I wanted to let you know that since I was diagnosed with ADHD and Autism at the age of 46 I've become active in my local communities various Autism support groups... a common topic of discussion in those groups is that we'll share helpful UA-cam channels like yours with each other so we can all have good self help resources since the medical community is basically devoid of any real help for us. A common trend I've noticed is that when I bring up your name, usually the women in the room light up with excitement. Especially younger women in their late teens or early 20s. "I absolutely love her!!!" etc... You've become somewhat of an Autistic feminine icon in my mind. I'm glad you're here for my own benefit but I thought it important to point out that you seen to have a core audience that's historically been very underrepresented in this space. Well done
Hyper focus made me create and learn a lot of things ppl don't expect. That's sounds amazing at first. But the problem is... easily you can frustrate or make ppl looks like dumb or idiot without notice you making someone feel bad. I made a lot of enemies, and naturally ppl tried avoid me when I was thinking that I was just being helpful. You try to make good, and they interpret as you being show off. That's what not diagnosed autism can do to an adult who don't know that has autism. I felt that on my skin, and get to 29 with nothing accomplished and with zero professional network. Now that I know i'm autistic, everything makes sense. It's very depressing and frustrating to being able to perform in a lot of things above average, and not having a professional life. All countries should do their best to identify kids with autism soon as possible, so they can know their condition. This is good for the child, and if the government think straight, that's good for the country as well. Because a lot of ppl with autism, due to their hyper focus, can actually perform much better than average in specifics jobs and skills, causing specific areas to be pushed further than we expect in therms of knowledge and technology, which leads to humanity evolving to another level.
Hyperfocus when you have both ADHD and ASD is definitely something, but I'm lucky that for me it doesn't usually last more than a few hours. I neglect my self-care as it is, if I was stuck in hyperfocus for two whole weeks I'd probably die from dehydration or hunger. Also, don't worry about the babble. As a fellow babbler, it's actually nice to let someone else do the babbling and just listen. 😊
Yeah, for hours... I don't think people realize how hard it is to break out of it, and that sometimes you literally forget what you're doing because you're just focused on executing the task at hand. It's very frequent. 😑
Hi Olivia, a video chatting with your parents about their response when they returned home and saw the house and perhaps their perceptions of the consequences of your hyper focus/activity could be a future video?
Agreed, except not the part where her family puts her down for everything she already knows. Maybe they could just make a lovely video about their shock and awe about their kitchen being done by her and how amazing she is.
I'm 69 and self-diagnosed. Sometimes I think "No, you're not on the Autism Spectrum. You just want to be to explain why you're "different.". But this is another reason that shows me that I am. I can see so many times that I've hyper focused. I sew and when I was a lot younger and made a lot of my clothes I would start and not stop until I was finished, no matter how long it took. Sometimes my mother would have to stop me to eat or if I was working too late into the night. I was really into cooking a few years ago and have a zillion cookbooks about all kinds of cooking. I have a lot of books and sometimes spend hours and hours reading about just one subject. My "Save" for UA-cam is mostly about archaeology because that is an "almost" hyper focus. I do genealogy and because of my hyper focus and noticing details, I've solved a lot of ancestor brick walls. The most recent was I found that the ancestors who were written about in a book were the wrong people. I found the right people with all kinds of proof that was overlooked by the author of the book. I found the ancestry of the right ancestors in the "Old Country" (Switzerland) and have traced most of the branches of the family back to the mid-1500s. I wrote it all down in book form and .... have lost my hyper focus on the subject. I'm sure that happens. But I started a family group for this family on Facebook and people want me to finish and make it into a book. So I am having to make myself do it. It's not that I'm not interested anymore. It's just that I'm not motivated (?). Is that the right word? Has that ever happened to anyone before?
I call it the tunnel, and sometimes I have to ask my husband if he REALLY wants to bump me out of the productivity tunnel so i can attend to that minor thing?? Are you sure? Cause I just can't decide to jump back into the tunnel....
@@chrystallangille1667 I have experienced The Tunnel, and I know well the misery of having to interrupt something, come back to it later...and have absolutely _NO IDEA_ where I was, what I was doing, what I had planned to do, the order I'd planned to do it...ugh. Like opening a novel to a random page and trying to figure out the plot.
I can relate so much, it’s helped me a lot to get things done especially with cleaning or projects but on the other hand it drains me like nothing else. 😭 It doesn’t help that we can be perfectionists too, so then we can’t stop until things are just right and then also really hard on ourselves. I really enjoyed this, always feel like I’m not alone in the world! ☺️ We want to see the kitchen now! 😂
Great video! I have problems hyper focusing like that, and in recent years sometimes my body revolts and shuts down. So now I try to do a self reflection every hour or two. Check in with my body, make sure my needs are being met and I have permission to continue. I'll set a repeating timer if I have to. Same goes for making sure I eat properly.
This is the first time I hear the term Hyper Focus! I am 32 years old and also on the autistic spectrum. I have many hyper focuses in my lifetime. I was born and raised in Winston-Salem, NC on August 24th 1990.
I discovered that my superpower has a name just a few weeks ago too. :D You might be interested into looking for the difference between hyperfocus and hyperfixations, it's pretty cool!
@@ernestoponce2137 To put it simply: hyperfocus is a state of the mind, while hyperfixation is an interest/passion. So you can be hyperfocused on one of your hyperfixations.
This is 100% me. I got diagnosed as an adult too and I am also 27 years old now. I am blessed with an awesome job which became my special interest and naturally I am thriving at it due to hyperfocus. But it's gotten insane over the last few months. I've been doing (or not doing) what you describe for MONTHS now. And it is almost impossible to stop me. Even me boss is getting mad because he doesn't even want me to work that much and they're all afraid I'll end up with burnout but I CAN'T STOP. You are absolutely right with everything you say.
Hi Olivia! I've been enjoying your videos for a long time. No need to apologize about not getting videos out regularly! We totally get it! I would really love to see your kitchen (even with it being half done!) My husband and I are the worst at finishing our home projects so I've been there! Love & blessings beautiful girl!
Olivia, I totally understand your mind state. I've been hyperfocusing on autism since April 2nd, reading and researching like if my life depended on it (while working full time and getting evaluations organized for myself and 2 of my kids) but I'm going to reach the point of burnout if I don't find balance soon. The question is how...
I started a meditation practice that helps me a lot. I have to meditate in a formal setting with a group of meditators and have only been partially successful on my own. When I get hyper focused I can’t meditate at home and then the weekly meeting is key to resetting my brain
@@saconnon That's an interesting strategy! I haven't been able to meditate at home in weeks, but there is a renowned meditation center 5 minutes from my house. I'll give it a try. Thanks for sharing.
Thank u for bringing to light the consequences and burn out that comes with something that seems good … there’s always a good and bad . It’s important that we’re informed and equip ourself with the knowledge
After school I studied chemistry and biology to become a graduated biologist. After that I totally changed and started to become a tax advisor. Most people ask me what made me change. It was that I had the feeling my way as a biologist had come to a stop. I just didn't want to do further. When I found taxes as a new subject to learn it was really by accident. It could have been almost anything. I have the ability to make anything I set my mind to to my main focus. That's how my mind works. Give me something to do and I'll give it my all! Whatever it is. And I just concentrate on that. Most people just don't understand.
Thank you 🙏🏽 so much, Olivia! Your videos are very helpful and informative. Genuinely, I’m appreciative of your willingness to share your story & experiences with ASD. This year, I turned 53 y/o and only recently learned I’m on the autism spectrum (now my entire world makes sense & you remind me of myself (I’m a babbler and share many stems with you). My ability to hyper focus is exhausting but so worth it! 🙏🏽💜
I have both autism and ADHD and I’ve done things like this before. It felt like hyper focus in to an extreme but I also had an enjoyable time while I was working on whatever project I was hyper focusing on followed by the inevitable exhaustion. I couldn’t sleep either because I couldn’t stop thinking about my current project and what else I needed to do. The exhaustion after a hyper focus episode would usually transition into a period of not so great to bad mental health. My therapist caught on to this pattern and determined that in addition to autism and ADHD, I also have bipolar disorder type 2. It causes hypomania episodes which can cause you to be extremely project driven and be able to accomplish a lot with hardly any sleep since you can’t stop thinking about your project. A depressive episode usually follows and you tend to be depressed more often than hypomanic. I am being treated for bipolar type 2 currently and it makes a huge difference. I can still hyper focus on projects but they’re not as consuming and I can still sleep. I don’t go into the high of hypomania anymore. I also have not been depressed for a long period of time for the first time in years. There’s a lot of stigma associated with bipolar disorder, but I would encourage you to look into it. What you’re describing sounds a lot like what I dealt with too. It can make you miserable over time.
I loved being left home alone! On the rare occasions that happened, I got to work on rearranging my bedroom furniture, cleaning out my closet, etc. just because nobody could stop me. My MIL is the same way. When her overprotective husband leaves town, she does home projects and renovations because he doesn't let her for health issues. She has caused injuries doing these things but it's not a deterrent. I have also injured myself by not taking breaks weeding in my garden because I just want to get every last one before I go in. I have hEDS and my SI joint slipped and crippled me for a week with the pain lasting a month from doing this. My husband tries to remind me to take breaks but I always think I am Wonder Woman or something. Anyway, now I'm babbling! Highly relatable. I hope they love your work and that you can heal and relax a bit and take care of yourself. I'm sitting here with COVID right now doing forced relaxation and watching videos. Know your red flags. Set alarms. Have snacks or self care tools handy. Whatever helps you survive these efficient spurts. Thanks for sharing this!
Scope creep during hyperfocus.... that's why it takes me so long to finish "Andy Projects"... Agree it is at the expense of talking/meeting people/eating/sleeping fully. Leaves me emotionally empty when I come up for air a few weeks later
Hi Olivia, welcome back and congratulations on entering married life. Do send my regards to Alex, your parents, and particularly to your mother-in-law (I hope she recovers quickly!) Oh yeah... hyperfocus and its strengths and weaknesses, its opportunities and threats. I am also thinking of tackling this on my channel down the line and how it affects undiagnosed autistics like me. Do take care of yourself and give yourself some grace. We'll wait for your next video.
My special interest went from mental health studies like phycology, to just plain health conditions mental/emotional or physically, like in general. Used to be only mental "disorders" and 'special needs' stuff, but now it had added physical like regular doctor stuff also.
I’m a father of two wonderful boys around your age Olivia. I don’t have a daughter. But if I would, she should be like you. You are amazing and you would make a dad so proud. And I would told you to rest the next week for a well earned recovery.
I love your channel and have shared with friends too. I have been told I’m overly sensitive too my entire life. I was also diagnosed with autism a few years ago now and I finally understand also why I cannot deal with being hot or the smell of asparagus. I also have to sleep on jersey type sheets. I prefer Sheex brand, they’re amazing. Hyper focus in corporate workplace is one of the most misunderstood aspects of autism that if employers could find acway to educate on could highly benefit from hiring people with this. When I go into hyperfocus my quality and efficiency is insanely high.
I find it easy to really focus on things I love like loom banding, card making and other crafting. I find it hard to focus on things that are difficult or and boring/not enjoyable. I can find myself needing to take a break much sooner than if I was loving what I was doing.
I have both ADHD and ASD. OCD is also commonly associated with both ADHD and ASD and while I don't actually have OCD I do tend to have many traits that are often associated with it. "Hyperfocus" is usually more associated with ADHD than ASD as it's usually a learned behavior, used to cope with the problems those with ADHD have focusing on projects. We learn to block out any and all sustains so we can actually finish important tasks. But as you've noticed, the mechanism has it's downsides as, we can forget to eat, sleep, use the bathroom. If the task we're working on is important enough, we can seem like miracle workers at times. Another primary feature of ADHD is our tendency to completely underestimate the difficulty or amount of work involved in an idea for a project we have. I suffer greatly from this... It doesn't help that my ADHD and ASD often make me far more effective at many tasks than neurotipical people are as, my plans ALWAYS sound impossible from their perspective. So it's not like I can ask someone if my plan sounds unreasonable... My plans always sound impossible to the neurotipical. I'm regards to your kitchen remodeling project, I think your mistake was in sticking to the larger plan of "remodel the kitchen" as in, your goal was to "finish" instead you likely should have reassessed at some point and realized that simply "make a lot of progress on the kitchen remodel" would also be an excellent goal... and that is likely that, if you got even half of it done before your family got home, that would likely trigger their interest as well, and they could have helped you finish the rest rather than burning yourself out
It's easy in hindsight to say that stopping to "reassess the situation" would have solved the problem. It would be nice if it were that simple. Once a person finds herself in hyperfocus mode, by very definition of the word, it can be virtually impossible to stop without intervention of some kind. At least for many of us. The need for external structure and motivation is a real thing, more so for some than others, so you may have a different experience. At any rate, I don't think its quite fair to proclaim where someone "went wrong". We all have a different set and level of struggles.
My student has this problem. She is currently sinking into a depression cycle (I have referred her to the appropriate support agencies) because she has drastically underperformed in her secondary school final exams, which has consequences for her next qualification and college courses etc. She hyper focuses on playing Minecraft and literally will not do anything else. Struggling feeding herself, not showering (she stinks), has had to go to the dentist for serious work because she doesn't brush her teeth. Stays up late playing, then doesn;t get enough sleep, comes late to school, doesn;t catch up despite exemptions so misses out on learning for which the gaps become to great. SHe's been given a back door opportunity but it requires her to take ownership and study for it, and it's looking like she will fail this too. Parent does not want to take her special interest away from her but it has become an obsession which is impacting on her life in a major way. We're at a loss at what to do.
All the things. I get stuck in research for other people, random topics, things I never actually do. I compulsively make large purchases for projects that take me forever to complete bc they're really 2 person jobs(currently leveling my backyard 🤦🏻♀️) .
I have a little brother that's on the Autism Spectrum Disorder so I experience Autism Spectrum with my brother!! I have a mild intellectual disability and very independent!!!
I painted my walls at least 20 times due to hyper sensitivity to colors, and if there’s the slightest clash of undertones, I become extremely distressed. I spent over $10k on paint samples and supplies. In the end, I settled for a pure white with neutral undertones 😅. Probably bought and tested 100 different shades of white. 9 years later, my home remodel is still unfinished. I’ve spent $50k so far, and have only refinished the cabinets & painted the walls. Can’t decide on flooring, even after spending $300 on samples. It must be perfect.
What's very interesting is that I thought of you early Sunday and then I got your notification of upcoming video. I get the hyperfocus and I can see myself postponing going to the toilet... waking up in the middle of the night to try to get some of the things I can get done, especially upon getting a new job. So, i had to talk myself into ease about it because no one else was pressuring me but myself! And I got sick right away which was a sign of unnecessary stress because it's a job i can do at my pace. My hyper focus is on getting things done and that in itself makes me want to erase the world and daily routine to just do that all waking time. But with being a mom and having to take care of my child, it prevents me from going on a roll. But it causes me to find all ways to get her to be out with her dad or grandpas so that I can finish or work on my project, which is paintings atm, commissions I have to deliver. There's no rush to deliver but I put such pressure on me and I don't know why... i gotta be careful with the not going to peee and holding it in because it's not good. Be well, rest, eat well, otherwise body says enough is enough and breaks down to slow us the fuck down :) All the best with wedding plans
A tough thing is when your work schedule prevents a hyper focused. Things have slowed down a bit at work as we are ahead of production. I spend a lot of time anxiously waiting around. I’m sure when I land my teaching job hyper focus on that exceeding the contract hours. I just need that positive feedback though.
For me, hyper Focus at work is great - until somebody wants me to completely change directions. Often this causes what I call an "internal meltdown" (I mask heavily).
Totally relate! That's why I 'm stuck at the moment. There are so many other things defocusing me, that I can't "allow" myself to hyperfocus. I will crash if I am in and have to brutally stop it to do something else. I feel you!
I so recognize this xD leave me unsupervised and I might have totally redone something in the house or started a huge project while you were away 🙈🙈 I would never do this if someone was home. (I am currently undergoing assessment for ASD, 33 yo)
I'm currently hyperfixated on reading these two boxes of books I was given for free. My goal is to have them finished by November. The reason I remember to self care is my autistic need/love for routine.
Hey Olivia, I completely agree with you but with one twist in how i experience it. I actually find that I often choose to hyperfocus on responsibilities related to school (was a very seroous student feom the beginning) and work but i dont necessarily find it something i can breeze through in termd of abolity which makes me question why im hyperfocusing on it. For example, school was extremely stressful and it did not come naturally. i was mostly an all around A student (with some moments of Bs and rarely Cs but it did happen in college twice i got C+ but thats all) . I would stay up writing papers and completing work but i didnt enjoy it. My teachers praised me, my peers teased me for being "too smart" and my grades showed my high achievement but my mental health state told a different story that no one cared about because the product was exceeding expectations. I guess what im trying to say is that i dont think im naturally good at anything. i am actually not good at writing, math ir any other academic subject but i stress over it for hours, suffer day after day and somehow pull it off with an A. I enjoyed learning new things very much and would often think about what i learned outside of class which is probably every teacher's dream but i longed for a break in the pressure and the graded performance. I remember my 3rd frade teacher said "you are the last one to finish on tests and eriting assignments but it ends up great" which was to say it wasnt a big deal to need extra time to produce quality work. But by the time i was in 7th grade, my teacher said i am not going to survive high school (when i described my sleep schedule of napping when i got home from school and then staying up to complete my homework) and i survived high school and even college but onlh just barely. No one else would say that, theyd say that getting honors diploma isnt exactly "barely" but i was actually in a chronic mental health crisis throughout and would go months without showering and was in a mental breakdown and then somehow i cared very much about submitting my essay on time . 😅
Olivia, your courage, compassion, perseverance, insight, enthusiasm, optimism, generosity, kindness, and wonderful sense of humor are all greatly appreciated. Here is a poem I wrote last week that is, in my mind, absolutely true for you: Your Calling Your courage, compassion, and perseverance Radiate from within, and are apparent for all to see; Your honesty, integrity, and authenticity Were never in doubt; Your kindness, generosity, and humility Set you apart; Your vast powers of intellect and understanding, The immense strength and depth of your emotions, Your deep wisdom, and your empathy, And the great beauty, purity, and goodness Within your heart stand out as clear as the noonday sun - And all of this leaves you with the knowledge That you have a responsibility, and a calling - To find your peace, to come to truly know yourself - To discover your meaning, your purpose, and your truth - And to find the best ways to share your great gifts - Your knowledge, your creativity, and your love - To guide, nurture, and help heal others Who are experiencing suffering Like that which you have known; And who are carrying great burdens Like the ones under which You were once encumbered; And who are lost, despairing, and alone, As you once were - Giving them hope, inspiring them, Instilling insight, wisdom, And enlightenment, Healing their hearts, Restoring their spirits, And helping them find their way. Daniel Salzer May 25, 2023
Yeah my biggest issues with hyperfocusing is not knowing when to take a break/not noticing that I need one and frequently hyperfocusing on the wrong thing like a video game despite needing to do a ton of other work or chores around the house, etc. I can't aim my hyperfocus very well unless I'm at work. If I'm at work, I'll hyperfocus on work and it's great, but outside of work, I can only aim that hyperfocus energy at the right thing like 20% of the time.
It's sort of like having your own endogenous version of an amphetamine productivity binge. It's beneficial what one can get done in a short period of time, but it can be taxing on your physical and mental health. And it can set up false expectations if your bosses or teachers or parents see your ability to accomplish so much in a short time and assume that's just something you can accomplish normally and come to expect it regularly.
Please do a video about what your parents reaction to the Kitchen, Thank you for your Videos. My 3 yr. old Granddaughter is autistic and is living with me now. It's good to get an Idea of possible things to come.
I love your content, but I wish I could hyper focus. My brain barely allows me to do basic things that keep me functioning. I can go to my therapist and the store, but I still love awesome content.
Dear Olivia, thanks for this video. Do you know ways to actively trigger autistic hyperfocus? I'm stuck for weeks and desperately need a hyperfocus period. Thanks and Greetings from the other side of the world :)
I find something, I hyper focus on it, I forget what time and day it is until something breaks that focus. And it's the only reason I'm not a fan of it. I like it. It's useful. But it's useful only in a managed state at least in my opinion. Otherwise, to me personally it can hurt me.
So what did your parents think of the work that you did in the kitchen? I hope they liked it. Also, could you tell me what paint color that is behind you, if you know it? It's very pretty.
Hyper focusing usually makes me more isolated. I don't care about what's around. Unless I'm trying to blab about what ive been focusing on to people and then they ignore me and then I get upset...lol
I unwittingly found myself in a hyper-focused state a couple nights ago while climbing a route at my climbing gym, after trying to tell my climbing partner that autistic inertia and hyper-focus are NOT the same, and she was using the terms also in non-autistic contexts. I got so absorbed in what I was doing, at one point I got to where there was a rope from the adjacent route that ended up getting tangled in me and got in the way. I was so focused on climbing (and thinking about our discussion) that I didn't process things immediately, and it took me a minute before I realized she was yelling at me, as well as I was actually in some pain from the rope getting tangled up with me... When I realized well enough what was happening, I fixed the interfering rope situation, and noted the pain. I completed the route to the top, the descended. Once I got back to the bottom and was taking off my belay device, my mind played back what I had felt and heard while in that hyper-focus, and I processed it, delayed processing, which I reportedly was known to do as a little kid (but I don't remember the particular scenario I was told). My observation was this: if I could have progressed further without addressing that problem, I would have. It physically kept me from moving up. That interfered with me in an odd way that got my attention because it was completely unexpected and wasn't something I could instinctively fix. But, perhaps if my partner (and I think another climber) hadn't been yelling at me, I might have still continued. If I'd been coming after someone with intent on harming them in that state of focus, they'd need to physically keep me from moving closer, and pain might not be processed until they were already too late. So, given that explanation, I'd wager you'd need to do something like turning off the lights where they absolutely need them on to make progress. Perhaps put a note over the switch "take care of your body, we love you!" Be sure it can't be readily removed. I think it needs to be an odd problem to solve they're not prepared for: otherwise, consider that if they've already far exceeded bathroom break durations, they are already not processing pain, their body is already undergoing bad effects, and... trying to get in their way physically is unsafe for all involved. They might not consciously process what they did to solve the problem of you getting in the way until after. I'm thinking the hyper-focus mode is something nature gave us for high-priority survival purposes where a little body abuse is not the most immediate existential threat. Take care of the most immediate thing, then consciously process the rest later, when the immediate threat is no longer present. I was fascinated how I had the replay of senses (hearing, pain) after I got done with that route.
I can't believe that instead of getting praises for doing the work of like 2 to 3 people of different departments, I get sht on because I cannot train the other employees to match my level. "Ok boss, do you think YOU can match my level? Who do you think can scan a 100-page documents 10 documents straight for key info? Not you, I know that for sure since you can't even read 1 short paragraph without being confused??"
"What do you want me to do besides providing training materials, while NOT being HR? Read the materials with them aloud word by word, while Googling terms for them? Give them my genetics so they can hyperfocus?? Invent cure for cancer while on my lunch break?"
Is autistic “hyper focus” also generally considered to be very goal oriented? I have a history of obsessively feeling the need to finish making things I decided were important enough to make. I have been learning that sometimes it’s better to not start projects that are too major
Ok idk if this is a purely me issue but i cant just stop something midway. Was there was lack of clarification as to how you just decided to stop? How do you not go into a meltdown fighting off hyperfocus and forcing yourself to stop before completion? When i focus on a task i go untill I literally finish or burnout. I feel as though I develop some form of trauma when i burnout midtask due to the fact that i tend to shutdown while experiencing what i feel are just typical panic attacks when trying to refocus on a task. Idk if this is relevant, however I have used my ability to 'zone in', 'study mode', 'hyperfocus' whatever you prefer to call it, to escape trauma ever since 1st grade. I am literally alive only because of this skill, ABA, Speech therapy, grooming, SA by a member of my parent's church(LDS) who used the church's bigotry against trans ppl to coerce my silence, Bullying that crossed into legit attempts, Closeting, Conversion Therapy, abuse both physical and emotional, complex trauma from school, night terrors, 2nd SA, hyperfocus has been that escape from emotional pain i needed to minimize my attempts at self harm.
“I’m going to finish this dang kitchen, because nobody’s here to tell me that I can’t.” You go girl!
I have a mild intellectual disability myself and very independent I have a little brother that is autistic so I know what Autism is like!!!
I wanted to let you know that since I was diagnosed with ADHD and Autism at the age of 46 I've become active in my local communities various Autism support groups... a common topic of discussion in those groups is that we'll share helpful UA-cam channels like yours with each other so we can all have good self help resources since the medical community is basically devoid of any real help for us. A common trend I've noticed is that when I bring up your name, usually the women in the room light up with excitement. Especially younger women in their late teens or early 20s. "I absolutely love her!!!" etc... You've become somewhat of an Autistic feminine icon in my mind. I'm glad you're here for my own benefit but I thought it important to point out that you seen to have a core audience that's historically been very underrepresented in this space. Well done
Hyper focus made me create and learn a lot of things ppl don't expect. That's sounds amazing at first. But the problem is... easily you can frustrate or make ppl looks like dumb or idiot without notice you making someone feel bad. I made a lot of enemies, and naturally ppl tried avoid me when I was thinking that I was just being helpful. You try to make good, and they interpret as you being show off. That's what not diagnosed autism can do to an adult who don't know that has autism.
I felt that on my skin, and get to 29 with nothing accomplished and with zero professional network. Now that I know i'm autistic, everything makes sense. It's very depressing and frustrating to being able to perform in a lot of things above average, and not having a professional life.
All countries should do their best to identify kids with autism soon as possible, so they can know their condition. This is good for the child, and if the government think straight, that's good for the country as well. Because a lot of ppl with autism, due to their hyper focus, can actually perform much better than average in specifics jobs and skills, causing specific areas to be pushed further than we expect in therms of knowledge and technology, which leads to humanity evolving to another level.
Hyperfocus when you have both ADHD and ASD is definitely something, but I'm lucky that for me it doesn't usually last more than a few hours. I neglect my self-care as it is, if I was stuck in hyperfocus for two whole weeks I'd probably die from dehydration or hunger. Also, don't worry about the babble. As a fellow babbler, it's actually nice to let someone else do the babbling and just listen. 😊
Yeah, for hours...
I don't think people realize how hard it is to break out of it, and that sometimes you literally forget what you're doing because you're just focused on executing the task at hand. It's very frequent. 😑
Hi Olivia, a video chatting with your parents about their response when they returned home and saw the house and perhaps their perceptions of the consequences of your hyper focus/activity could be a future video?
This would be amazing!
Yes! I want to hear about your family's reaction if you are comfortable sharing please!
Agreed, except not the part where her family puts her down for everything she already knows. Maybe they could just make a lovely video about their shock and awe about their kitchen being done by her and how amazing she is.
I'm 69 and self-diagnosed. Sometimes I think "No, you're not on the Autism Spectrum. You just want to be to explain why you're "different.". But this is another reason that shows me that I am. I can see so many times that I've hyper focused. I sew and when I was a lot younger and made a lot of my clothes I would start and not stop until I was finished, no matter how long it took. Sometimes my mother would have to stop me to eat or if I was working too late into the night. I was really into cooking a few years ago and have a zillion cookbooks about all kinds of cooking. I have a lot of books and sometimes spend hours and hours reading about just one subject. My "Save" for UA-cam is mostly about archaeology because that is an "almost" hyper focus. I do genealogy and because of my hyper focus and noticing details, I've solved a lot of ancestor brick walls. The most recent was I found that the ancestors who were written about in a book were the wrong people. I found the right people with all kinds of proof that was overlooked by the author of the book. I found the ancestry of the right ancestors in the "Old Country" (Switzerland) and have traced most of the branches of the family back to the mid-1500s. I wrote it all down in book form and .... have lost my hyper focus on the subject. I'm sure that happens. But I started a family group for this family on Facebook and people want me to finish and make it into a book. So I am having to make myself do it. It's not that I'm not interested anymore. It's just that I'm not motivated (?). Is that the right word? Has that ever happened to anyone before?
My hyperfocus continues until I have satisfied my interest in something...and then poof...gone.
I call it the tunnel, and sometimes I have to ask my husband if he REALLY wants to bump me out of the productivity tunnel so i can attend to that minor thing?? Are you sure? Cause I just can't decide to jump back into the tunnel....
@@chrystallangille1667 I have experienced The Tunnel, and I know well the misery of having to interrupt something, come back to it later...and have absolutely _NO IDEA_ where I was, what I was doing, what I had planned to do, the order I'd planned to do it...ugh. Like opening a novel to a random page and trying to figure out the plot.
I LOVE my hyperfocus. But I don't like when it gets to the point that I can't sleep because my brain won't calm down.
I can relate so much, it’s helped me a lot to get things done especially with cleaning or projects but on the other hand it drains me like nothing else. 😭 It doesn’t help that we can be perfectionists too, so then we can’t stop until things are just right and then also really hard on ourselves. I really enjoyed this, always feel like I’m not alone in the world! ☺️ We want to see the kitchen now! 😂
Great video! I have problems hyper focusing like that, and in recent years sometimes my body revolts and shuts down. So now I try to do a self reflection every hour or two. Check in with my body, make sure my needs are being met and I have permission to continue. I'll set a repeating timer if I have to. Same goes for making sure I eat properly.
This is the first time I hear the term Hyper Focus! I am 32 years old and also on the autistic spectrum. I have many hyper focuses in my lifetime. I was born and raised in Winston-Salem, NC on August 24th 1990.
I discovered that my superpower has a name just a few weeks ago too. :D You might be interested into looking for the difference between hyperfocus and hyperfixations, it's pretty cool!
@@LaJarnigouenne hyper fixations. Now that's a new term I'm hearing for the first time too.
@@ernestoponce2137 To put it simply: hyperfocus is a state of the mind, while hyperfixation is an interest/passion. So you can be hyperfocused on one of your hyperfixations.
Okay. You got a point.
This is 100% me. I got diagnosed as an adult too and I am also 27 years old now. I am blessed with an awesome job which became my special interest and naturally I am thriving at it due to hyperfocus.
But it's gotten insane over the last few months. I've been doing (or not doing) what you describe for MONTHS now. And it is almost impossible to stop me. Even me boss is getting mad because he doesn't even want me to work that much and they're all afraid I'll end up with burnout but I CAN'T STOP.
You are absolutely right with everything you say.
Hi Olivia! I've been enjoying your videos for a long time. No need to apologize about not getting videos out regularly! We totally get it! I would really love to see your kitchen (even with it being half done!) My husband and I are the worst at finishing our home projects so I've been there! Love & blessings beautiful girl!
Olivia, I totally understand your mind state. I've been hyperfocusing on autism since April 2nd, reading and researching like if my life depended on it (while working full time and getting evaluations organized for myself and 2 of my kids) but I'm going to reach the point of burnout if I don't find balance soon. The question is how...
When you figure out the how part, please let me know, too.
I started a meditation practice that helps me a lot. I have to meditate in a formal setting with a group of meditators and have only been partially successful on my own. When I get hyper focused I can’t meditate at home and then the weekly meeting is key to resetting my brain
@@saconnon That's an interesting strategy! I haven't been able to meditate at home in weeks, but there is a renowned meditation center 5 minutes from my house. I'll give it a try. Thanks for sharing.
Thank u for bringing to light the consequences and burn out that comes with something that seems good … there’s always a good and bad . It’s important that we’re informed and equip ourself with the knowledge
After school I studied chemistry and biology to become a graduated biologist. After that I totally changed and started to become a tax advisor. Most people ask me what made me change. It was that I had the feeling my way as a biologist had come to a stop. I just didn't want to do further. When I found taxes as a new subject to learn it was really by accident. It could have been almost anything. I have the ability to make anything I set my mind to to my main focus. That's how my mind works. Give me something to do and I'll give it my all! Whatever it is. And I just concentrate on that. Most people just don't understand.
Thank you 🙏🏽 so much, Olivia! Your videos are very helpful and informative. Genuinely, I’m appreciative of your willingness to share your story & experiences with ASD. This year, I turned 53 y/o and only recently learned I’m on the autism spectrum (now my entire world makes sense & you remind me of myself (I’m a babbler and share many stems with you). My ability to hyper focus is exhausting but so worth it! 🙏🏽💜
I have both autism and ADHD and I’ve done things like this before. It felt like hyper focus in to an extreme but I also had an enjoyable time while I was working on whatever project I was hyper focusing on followed by the inevitable exhaustion. I couldn’t sleep either because I couldn’t stop thinking about my current project and what else I needed to do. The exhaustion after a hyper focus episode would usually transition into a period of not so great to bad mental health. My therapist caught on to this pattern and determined that in addition to autism and ADHD, I also have bipolar disorder type 2. It causes hypomania episodes which can cause you to be extremely project driven and be able to accomplish a lot with hardly any sleep since you can’t stop thinking about your project. A depressive episode usually follows and you tend to be depressed more often than hypomanic. I am being treated for bipolar type 2 currently and it makes a huge difference. I can still hyper focus on projects but they’re not as consuming and I can still sleep. I don’t go into the high of hypomania anymore. I also have not been depressed for a long period of time for the first time in years. There’s a lot of stigma associated with bipolar disorder, but I would encourage you to look into it. What you’re describing sounds a lot like what I dealt with too. It can make you miserable over time.
Kayla, these comments are quite informative and helpful, and I appreciate your sharing them.
I loved being left home alone! On the rare occasions that happened, I got to work on rearranging my bedroom furniture, cleaning out my closet, etc. just because nobody could stop me. My MIL is the same way. When her overprotective husband leaves town, she does home projects and renovations because he doesn't let her for health issues. She has caused injuries doing these things but it's not a deterrent. I have also injured myself by not taking breaks weeding in my garden because I just want to get every last one before I go in. I have hEDS and my SI joint slipped and crippled me for a week with the pain lasting a month from doing this. My husband tries to remind me to take breaks but I always think I am Wonder Woman or something. Anyway, now I'm babbling! Highly relatable. I hope they love your work and that you can heal and relax a bit and take care of yourself. I'm sitting here with COVID right now doing forced relaxation and watching videos. Know your red flags. Set alarms. Have snacks or self care tools handy. Whatever helps you survive these efficient spurts. Thanks for sharing this!
Scope creep during hyperfocus.... that's why it takes me so long to finish "Andy Projects"... Agree it is at the expense of talking/meeting people/eating/sleeping fully. Leaves me emotionally empty when I come up for air a few weeks later
Hi Olivia, welcome back and congratulations on entering married life. Do send my regards to Alex, your parents, and particularly to your mother-in-law (I hope she recovers quickly!)
Oh yeah... hyperfocus and its strengths and weaknesses, its opportunities and threats. I am also thinking of tackling this on my channel down the line and how it affects undiagnosed autistics like me.
Do take care of yourself and give yourself some grace. We'll wait for your next video.
I love your babbling; it resonates with my own thinking style.
My special interest went from mental health studies like phycology, to just plain health conditions mental/emotional or physically, like in general. Used to be only mental "disorders" and 'special needs' stuff, but now it had added physical like regular doctor stuff also.
I’m a father of two wonderful boys around your age Olivia. I don’t have a daughter. But if I would, she should be like you. You are amazing and you would make a dad so proud.
And I would told you to rest the next week for a well earned recovery.
I love your channel and have shared with friends too. I have been told I’m overly sensitive too my entire life. I was also diagnosed with autism a few years ago now and I finally understand also why I cannot deal with being hot or the smell of asparagus. I also have to sleep on jersey type sheets. I prefer Sheex brand, they’re amazing. Hyper focus in corporate workplace is one of the most misunderstood aspects of autism that if employers could find acway to educate on could highly benefit from hiring people with this. When I go into hyperfocus my quality and efficiency is insanely high.
I find it easy to really focus on things I love like loom banding, card making and other crafting. I find it hard to focus on things that are difficult or and boring/not enjoyable. I can find myself needing to take a break much sooner than if I was loving what I was doing.
I have both ADHD and ASD. OCD is also commonly associated with both ADHD and ASD and while I don't actually have OCD I do tend to have many traits that are often associated with it. "Hyperfocus" is usually more associated with ADHD than ASD as it's usually a learned behavior, used to cope with the problems those with ADHD have focusing on projects. We learn to block out any and all sustains so we can actually finish important tasks. But as you've noticed, the mechanism has it's downsides as, we can forget to eat, sleep, use the bathroom. If the task we're working on is important enough, we can seem like miracle workers at times. Another primary feature of ADHD is our tendency to completely underestimate the difficulty or amount of work involved in an idea for a project we have. I suffer greatly from this... It doesn't help that my ADHD and ASD often make me far more effective at many tasks than neurotipical people are as, my plans ALWAYS sound impossible from their perspective. So it's not like I can ask someone if my plan sounds unreasonable... My plans always sound impossible to the neurotipical. I'm regards to your kitchen remodeling project, I think your mistake was in sticking to the larger plan of "remodel the kitchen" as in, your goal was to "finish" instead you likely should have reassessed at some point and realized that simply "make a lot of progress on the kitchen remodel" would also be an excellent goal... and that is likely that, if you got even half of it done before your family got home, that would likely trigger their interest as well, and they could have helped you finish the rest rather than burning yourself out
It's easy in hindsight to say that stopping to "reassess the situation" would have solved the problem. It would be nice if it were that simple. Once a person finds herself in hyperfocus mode, by very definition of the word, it can be virtually impossible to stop without intervention of some kind. At least for many of us. The need for external structure and motivation is a real thing, more so for some than others, so you may have a different experience. At any rate, I don't think its quite fair to proclaim where someone "went wrong". We all have a different set and level of struggles.
My student has this problem. She is currently sinking into a depression cycle (I have referred her to the appropriate support agencies) because she has drastically underperformed in her secondary school final exams, which has consequences for her next qualification and college courses etc. She hyper focuses on playing Minecraft and literally will not do anything else. Struggling feeding herself, not showering (she stinks), has had to go to the dentist for serious work because she doesn't brush her teeth. Stays up late playing, then doesn;t get enough sleep, comes late to school, doesn;t catch up despite exemptions so misses out on learning for which the gaps become to great. SHe's been given a back door opportunity but it requires her to take ownership and study for it, and it's looking like she will fail this too. Parent does not want to take her special interest away from her but it has become an obsession which is impacting on her life in a major way. We're at a loss at what to do.
I your videos teach me so much about my granddaughter. Thank you for doing this for all of us. ❤
The positive: I can get job assignments done with extreme proficiency. The negative: I'll lose track of time and leave work 3 hours late.
All the things. I get stuck in research for other people, random topics, things I never actually do. I compulsively make large purchases for projects that take me forever to complete bc they're really 2 person jobs(currently leveling my backyard 🤦🏻♀️) .
I have a little brother that's on the Autism Spectrum Disorder so I experience Autism Spectrum with my brother!! I have a mild intellectual disability and very independent!!!
OLIVIA! ❤ Hope you are well! 😘
I painted my walls at least 20 times due to hyper sensitivity to colors, and if there’s the slightest clash of undertones, I become extremely distressed. I spent over $10k on paint samples and supplies. In the end, I settled for a pure white with neutral undertones 😅. Probably bought and tested 100 different shades of white. 9 years later, my home remodel is still unfinished. I’ve spent $50k so far, and have only refinished the cabinets & painted the walls. Can’t decide on flooring, even after spending $300 on samples. It must be perfect.
I call.periods of hyperfocus as my "mini manias". They're fun !! It feels good.
What's very interesting is that I thought of you early Sunday and then I got your notification of upcoming video.
I get the hyperfocus and I can see myself postponing going to the toilet... waking up in the middle of the night to try to get some of the things I can get done, especially upon getting a new job. So, i had to talk myself into ease about it because no one else was pressuring me but myself! And I got sick right away which was a sign of unnecessary stress because it's a job i can do at my pace. My hyper focus is on getting things done and that in itself makes me want to erase the world and daily routine to just do that all waking time. But with being a mom and having to take care of my child, it prevents me from going on a roll. But it causes me to find all ways to get her to be out with her dad or grandpas so that I can finish or work on my project, which is paintings atm, commissions I have to deliver. There's no rush to deliver but I put such pressure on me and I don't know why... i gotta be careful with the not going to peee and holding it in because it's not good. Be well, rest, eat well, otherwise body says enough is enough and breaks down to slow us the fuck down :)
All the best with wedding plans
A tough thing is when your work schedule prevents a hyper focused. Things have slowed down a bit at work as we are ahead of production. I spend a lot of time anxiously waiting around. I’m sure when I land my teaching job hyper focus on that exceeding the contract hours. I just need that positive feedback though.
For me, hyper Focus at work is great - until somebody wants me to completely change directions. Often this causes what I call an "internal meltdown" (I mask heavily).
Totally relate! That's why I 'm stuck at the moment. There are so many other things defocusing me, that I can't "allow" myself to hyperfocus. I will crash if I am in and have to brutally stop it to do something else. I feel you!
I so recognize this xD leave me unsupervised and I might have totally redone something in the house or started a huge project while you were away 🙈🙈 I would never do this if someone was home. (I am currently undergoing assessment for ASD, 33 yo)
I'm currently hyperfixated on reading these two boxes of books I was given for free. My goal is to have them finished by November. The reason I remember to self care is my autistic need/love for routine.
Hey Olivia,
I completely agree with you but with one twist in how i experience it. I actually find that I often choose to hyperfocus on responsibilities related to school (was a very seroous student feom the beginning) and work but i dont necessarily find it something i can breeze through in termd of abolity which makes me question why im hyperfocusing on it. For example, school was extremely stressful and it did not come naturally. i was mostly an all around A student (with some moments of Bs and rarely Cs but it did happen in college twice i got C+ but thats all) . I would stay up writing papers and completing work but i didnt enjoy it. My teachers praised me, my peers teased me for being "too smart" and my grades showed my high achievement but my mental health state told a different story that no one cared about because the product was exceeding expectations. I guess what im trying to say is that i dont think im naturally good at anything. i am actually not good at writing, math ir any other academic subject but i stress over it for hours, suffer day after day and somehow pull it off with an A. I enjoyed learning new things very much and would often think about what i learned outside of class which is probably every teacher's dream but i longed for a break in the pressure and the graded performance. I remember my 3rd frade teacher said "you are the last one to finish on tests and eriting assignments but it ends up great" which was to say it wasnt a big deal to need extra time to produce quality work. But by the time i was in 7th grade, my teacher said i am not going to survive high school (when i described my sleep schedule of napping when i got home from school and then staying up to complete my homework) and i survived high school and even college but onlh just barely. No one else would say that, theyd say that getting honors diploma isnt exactly "barely" but i was actually in a chronic mental health crisis throughout and would go months without showering and was in a mental breakdown and then somehow i cared very much about submitting my essay on time . 😅
Downside of hyperfocus? Burnout!
I've gone my whole life thinking either everyone was like that, or everyone wasn't like that and I was just broken.
Thanks for being so truthful, thanks for being you. I’m sure your parents will love the kitchen. Look after yourself. ❤
Olivia, your courage, compassion, perseverance, insight, enthusiasm, optimism, generosity, kindness, and wonderful sense of humor are all greatly appreciated.
Here is a poem I wrote last week that is, in my mind, absolutely true for you:
Your Calling
Your courage, compassion, and perseverance
Radiate from within, and are apparent for all to see;
Your honesty, integrity, and authenticity
Were never in doubt;
Your kindness, generosity, and humility
Set you apart;
Your vast powers of intellect and understanding,
The immense strength and depth of your emotions,
Your deep wisdom, and your empathy,
And the great beauty, purity, and goodness
Within your heart stand out as clear as the noonday sun -
And all of this leaves you with the knowledge
That you have a responsibility, and a calling -
To find your peace, to come to truly know yourself -
To discover your meaning, your purpose, and your truth -
And to find the best ways to share your great gifts -
Your knowledge, your creativity, and your love -
To guide, nurture, and help heal others
Who are experiencing suffering
Like that which you have known;
And who are carrying great burdens
Like the ones under which
You were once encumbered;
And who are lost, despairing, and alone,
As you once were -
Giving them hope, inspiring them,
Instilling insight, wisdom,
And enlightenment,
Healing their hearts,
Restoring their spirits,
And helping them find their way.
Daniel Salzer
May 25, 2023
Yeah my biggest issues with hyperfocusing is not knowing when to take a break/not noticing that I need one and frequently hyperfocusing on the wrong thing like a video game despite needing to do a ton of other work or chores around the house, etc. I can't aim my hyperfocus very well unless I'm at work. If I'm at work, I'll hyperfocus on work and it's great, but outside of work, I can only aim that hyperfocus energy at the right thing like 20% of the time.
It's sort of like having your own endogenous version of an amphetamine productivity binge. It's beneficial what one can get done in a short period of time, but it can be taxing on your physical and mental health. And it can set up false expectations if your bosses or teachers or parents see your ability to accomplish so much in a short time and assume that's just something you can accomplish normally and come to expect it regularly.
I put so much into focusing on my special interests that I get overwhelmed and tired.
Please do a video about what your parents reaction to the Kitchen, Thank you for your Videos. My 3 yr. old Granddaughter is autistic and is living with me now. It's good to get an Idea of possible things to come.
I have heard of the negative.
I am adhd.
Two of my children are autistic.
Blessings from Montreal Canada
We missed you! Do we get kitchen before and afters?:-)
I love your content, but I wish I could hyper focus. My brain barely allows me to do basic things that keep me functioning. I can go to my therapist and the store, but I still love awesome content.
Dear Olivia, thanks for this video. Do you know ways to actively trigger autistic hyperfocus? I'm stuck for weeks and desperately need a hyperfocus period. Thanks and Greetings from the other side of the world :)
I find something, I hyper focus on it, I forget what time and day it is until something breaks that focus. And it's the only reason I'm not a fan of it. I like it. It's useful. But it's useful only in a managed state at least in my opinion. Otherwise, to me personally it can hurt me.
i love cereal too lol. I hyper focus too. I just cant stop doing something sometimes.
So what did your parents think of the work that you did in the kitchen? I hope they liked it. Also, could you tell me what paint color that is behind you, if you know it? It's very pretty.
I love how u make videos when you’re a “hot mess” :) good work :)
Hyper focusing usually makes me more isolated. I don't care about what's around. Unless I'm trying to blab about what ive been focusing on to people and then they ignore me and then I get upset...lol
Your parents will be proud of you.
They will figure something is off as soon as they see the weeds.
What do you recommend to loved ones when your Autistic person becomes hyper focused that they are not caring for their needs?
I unwittingly found myself in a hyper-focused state a couple nights ago while climbing a route at my climbing gym, after trying to tell my climbing partner that autistic inertia and hyper-focus are NOT the same, and she was using the terms also in non-autistic contexts.
I got so absorbed in what I was doing, at one point I got to where there was a rope from the adjacent route that ended up getting tangled in me and got in the way. I was so focused on climbing (and thinking about our discussion) that I didn't process things immediately, and it took me a minute before I realized she was yelling at me, as well as I was actually in some pain from the rope getting tangled up with me...
When I realized well enough what was happening, I fixed the interfering rope situation, and noted the pain.
I completed the route to the top, the descended. Once I got back to the bottom and was taking off my belay device, my mind played back what I had felt and heard while in that hyper-focus, and I processed it, delayed processing, which I reportedly was known to do as a little kid (but I don't remember the particular scenario I was told).
My observation was this: if I could have progressed further without addressing that problem, I would have. It physically kept me from moving up. That interfered with me in an odd way that got my attention because it was completely unexpected and wasn't something I could instinctively fix. But, perhaps if my partner (and I think another climber) hadn't been yelling at me, I might have still continued. If I'd been coming after someone with intent on harming them in that state of focus, they'd need to physically keep me from moving closer, and pain might not be processed until they were already too late.
So, given that explanation, I'd wager you'd need to do something like turning off the lights where they absolutely need them on to make progress. Perhaps put a note over the switch "take care of your body, we love you!" Be sure it can't be readily removed. I think it needs to be an odd problem to solve they're not prepared for: otherwise, consider that if they've already far exceeded bathroom break durations, they are already not processing pain, their body is already undergoing bad effects, and... trying to get in their way physically is unsafe for all involved. They might not consciously process what they did to solve the problem of you getting in the way until after.
I'm thinking the hyper-focus mode is something nature gave us for high-priority survival purposes where a little body abuse is not the most immediate existential threat. Take care of the most immediate thing, then consciously process the rest later, when the immediate threat is no longer present. I was fascinated how I had the replay of senses (hearing, pain) after I got done with that route.
I can't believe that instead of getting praises for doing the work of like 2 to 3 people of different departments, I get sht on because I cannot train the other employees to match my level. "Ok boss, do you think YOU can match my level? Who do you think can scan a 100-page documents 10 documents straight for key info? Not you, I know that for sure since you can't even read 1 short paragraph without being confused??"
"What do you want me to do besides providing training materials, while NOT being HR? Read the materials with them aloud word by word, while Googling terms for them? Give them my genetics so they can hyperfocus?? Invent cure for cancer while on my lunch break?"
Is autistic “hyper focus” also generally considered to be very goal oriented? I have a history of obsessively feeling the need to finish making things I decided were important enough to make. I have been learning that sometimes it’s better to not start projects that are too major
my parents annoy me when I'm reading or playing videogames, maybe that's a downside of hyperfocus
Ok idk if this is a purely me issue but i cant just stop something midway. Was there was lack of clarification as to how you just decided to stop?
How do you not go into a meltdown fighting off hyperfocus and forcing yourself to stop before completion?
When i focus on a task i go untill I literally finish or burnout. I feel as though I develop some form of trauma when i burnout midtask due to the fact that i tend to shutdown while experiencing what i feel are just typical panic attacks when trying to refocus on a task.
Idk if this is relevant, however I have used my ability to 'zone in', 'study mode', 'hyperfocus' whatever you prefer to call it, to escape trauma ever since 1st grade. I am literally alive only because of this skill, ABA, Speech therapy, grooming, SA by a member of my parent's church(LDS) who used the church's bigotry against trans ppl to coerce my silence, Bullying that crossed into legit attempts, Closeting, Conversion Therapy, abuse both physical and emotional, complex trauma from school, night terrors, 2nd SA, hyperfocus has been that escape from emotional pain i needed to minimize my attempts at self harm.
How did it turn out? Do your parents like the kitchen?
Your video sounds like my normal. And yes it wears us out. Maybe we have to accept this downside?
👍👍🙏
Let us know about your parents reaction please lol
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