I'm 31 and still get treated like a kid. It's extremely degrading. I've spent almost a decade working 55 hour weeks in blue collar jobs, bought 4 houses, two of which have no mortgages and I'm the landlord of them all. I find it truly baffling as to what it takes for me personally to be seen as an adult.
Wow after hearing your experience as a I know I might be given this shitty treatment as a history professor once I am a history professor from my students.
@@lisastade4992 Depends on demeanour I guess. I'm becoming more hardened and less inclined to take mockery but I haven't actually exposed myself enough to be on the receiving end of it too much recently. It's honestly annoying to have shreds ripped into me by people who are one missed pay check away from relying on a food bank. Another thing I get a lot of is people having a dig at my luck with women. A lot of them are no oil paintings themselves. I might end up dishing out what I take next time something really annoys me.
This has happened to me too! My mother has known I'm autistic since I was first tested as a baby. She kept it a secret till I was diagnosed just last year. I am 44 this year and I have always been infantalized my whole life! Even by younger people. I was a nanny in college (I was 25) and a friend of the family was 14 and treated me like a child younger than her! I wonder if it's subliminal or something?
@@makichandes It is definitely subliminal. I’m 47 and male, and we have a 15 yr old girl volunteer at work. She treats me just like a child despite me not saying one word about being autistic.
@@makichandes I was the same . Parents were told I was autistic as a child .but kept it secret because they thought I would grow out of it or use it as an excuse . I was officially diagnosed in my late teens. And my parents told me they already knew . I feel betrayed to this very day .someone the other week tried to infantalise me and I told her I didn’t like her attitude .she tried to make me feel like I misunderstood her. Grrr people make me feel mad
yeah , movies and tv shows when they have a developmental / cognitive or learning disabled character, they are almost always portrayed in a very simplistic, childlike immature, naive mind set and personality, very very rarely has any movie really showed a disabled character as a complex dynamic ADULT in which they were .
I had people patronising me treating me like am 5 years old and it’s very annoying, your video was absolutely amazing I’ve enjoyed every little bit of it🙂
@@obitouchiha6439 um. Are you not aware of the economic state of America and how much houses cost now, even when you're renting? And it's even more difficult for a disabled person to move out since the disability system is a joke and jobs rarely pay a wage that match the prices of houses. You have to have very special circumstances and privilege in some areas to make it a lot of time. So saying "move out" as if he can just teleport out is kinda ignorant.
@@divamoosic Bold of you to assume that I have any privilege. I was born into a dirt poor family, but chose to get myself out of it before reaching my 20s. I got roommates, that's what my generation did when we became young adults to lighten the load in regards to rent.
Thank you thank you thank you! This is the reason I never tell people I’m autistic, even my own parents just don’t understand and have tried this with me before,but with them I’m able to shut it down more easily But one of my friends, when I told them, they said “thanks for telling me that!” And we kept talking like normal, and it was the most validating thing ever
Im a 27 Year old woman with ADD (ADHD inattentive) and currently in the process of getting my ASD diagnosis. THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I GET TREATED LIKE A FUCKN CHILD IS FUCKN INFURIATING 🤬 (sorry for the caps🤣) like there were times where some girls r like 3-4 years younger than me talk to me like a middle schooler BUT as soon as i say im 27 they’re like 😶 wtf i hate the fact sometimes no one takes me seriously 😔
I stumbled across this video while looking for a video talking about the infantilization of neurodivergent (more specifically autistic) coded characters, n it's shocking that you can see that ppl don't treat neurodivergent ppl seriously when they do the same thing with neurodivergent characters :( I have experienced that a bit because of my ADHD, but it's mostly because I carry tiny toys on my backpack to fidget n play when I'm stressed (I'm in college), so ppl make fun of me n call me a baby. I really like hearing ppl with different neurodivergencies talking about their struggles, it helps me to understand the traits to make friends n write characters! Really liked your video! 😊
omg i knoow right, it's so frustrating and i hate how neurodivergent characters get treated like kids 🤦🏻♂️ i;m so sorry you go through that but i hope this helps at least a bit 😋 thank youuu
I feel this at work, and I now when they treat me like a child I just start acting like a child. Yes, I am autistic and nearing my 26th birthday. I’m also in college for nursing. I just found your channel and I love your energy, by the way.
I know a person with Down's syndrome that is very much like an eternal 12 year old. So many people treat her like she is 6 or 7, which is totally unfair because again, she is like a 12 year old and deserves some respect
This video got me to subscribe I relate so much to everything here and it’s why I don’t want to tell people I’m autistic due to the “negative” and childlike stigma behind it I don’t want them to think any differently of me I just want them to know I’m slightly different that’s all
As a person with autism, my mum keeps saying “You’re not autistic, you just need to socialize” LIKE BRUH, ITS LITERALLY NOT JUST AN ANTISOCIAL DISORDER- It is how the brain functions. I am somewhat non verbal ( have trouble pronouncing words or speaking sometimes ), and when people meet me they make fun of me and say “Awww! You made it all the way here!” Like, stop infantilitizing me. I’m fine in my head. They usually watch stereotypical movies like Music by Sia, Rain Man, and much more. bye lol
Darn that must be so frustrating for you :( Like what on earth, do they not realise having thoughts in your head and communicating them are two different things? It seems those people you met, while they might have the ability to communicate, they clearly aren't fine in the head like you are! Stay strong and kind, hanako! Don't listen to their meanness :(
@@ishaalimtiaz6715Hi! This is actually my old acc 😭 but my mum has gotten better at understanding autism in general, thankfully. Plus, I’m actually doing a lot better now! But thank you so much for the kind words, it really means a lot to me.
Honestly, at that point, it's best to give them nasty side eyes and then ask in a really concerned tone "Sir/Ma'am? Are you hallucinating? Am I a dog to you? Should I call an ambulance or something???"
My sister got diagnosed at 14/15. As soon as she got diagnosed, our whole family, particularly grandparents, started treating her like a child, speaking to her as if she couldn't understand them (for some context, she got a 9 in GCSE Maths, and is planning on becoming a Primary School Teacher). I think that they think they're being helpful, but it just feels horrible and infantilising. I'm really worried, because I'm on a waiting list for a diagnosis and I worry that they'll do it to me when I get diagnosed.
that fully sucks and its exhausting for her and can make you feel scared 🥺 i'd say remind her and yourself that you're both adults are caple of anything, you can do this and it's their small minds, not your existence
I'm 23, and I made the mistake of applying for handicapped support. I have Autism too. I immediately got infantilized by those, not one, but TWO psychiatrists who tried to talk further education out of me. They were all like "But you went to this school, you will not hack it here" bla di bla deh blah... when I go to University, I won't apply for handicapped support anymore. I hate talking to mental health professionals, because I made the experience that I got infantilized by mental health professionals themselves. And I'm sick of it. The best therapy for me is sitting at home, playing Minecraft and cuddling with my cats, than going somewhere after work, when I'm exhausted af, where I don't even want to be.
awee i'm so sorry and yeah i get that, it is mentally exhausting sometimes to constantly talk about it and then be infantilized, definitely take care of yourself
There's a real issue in uni that most teachers, no matter how nice and good they are, refuse to give you the support you need, even if you have a paper FROM YOUR DOCTOR explaining the situation. A colleague sent a document requesting to make her tests in a different room because she can't concentrate with classroom noise. Technically she has this, but everytime the professors say "we don't have anyone to watch you and make sure you won't cheat". I asked to give presentations to the professors only, not in front of class, no one lets me do that. All of these things are allowed by law, but good luck getting it.
"How was I infantilized as a kid"? Because kids get treated like younger kids all the time, especially disabled kids. There's a reason why it's called "infantilization" and not "kid-ization".
Autistic here, and my experiences were actually the opposite! I was usually seen as a demon or a problem child. I would actually wish people would see me as innocent so they would protect me and be gentle with me, instead of bullying me. 😢 “Cute” and “Innocent” I tend to read as someone approachable, lovely and non threatening. Traits I want to be. There is even a character I relate to - Elias Ainsworth from the anime The Ancient Magus Bride. Elias wants to learn and understand people, but he’s a demonic fae with the skull of a wolf and people are afraid of him.
I kinda have that same problem too. and what's worse. Is that the "state" and or "system" can legally take away some people's rights. and you don't have to do anything wrong. some adults still have rights taken away while being judged. anyone in your situation probably need to leave. and Never be found again.
Thank you for talking about this, I've noticed several times that after I would tell coworkers that I am autistic, they'd start acting different. It was never anything super obvious, or at least not super obvious to me, but it is still very annoying and disheartening to know that telling someone I am autistic could lead to them seeing me as less than, and like a child instead of the adult I am.
I’ve been in university for 2.5 years now and I am still being treated like a 5 year old. At this rate, I would like to have a 1 on 1 confrontation, but I have not been able to do so because I’m super hesitant and weary on how the said people would react to it.
oh that's the worst, i'm so so sorry that's the worst, i get why you would be wary, i'd feel the same but i do feel like saying something is a good thing 💖 you deserve to be treated with respect
Its funny today I had a dog training class (I am a dog trainer) and I was telling the owners about this movie I watched its called 100% wolf 🐺 good movie btw anywho I got really excited and was hand flapping and when I later got into the car and was talking to my husband and was like is it weird that I watched kid cartoons? He said it dosnt matter what they think be who you are! You been trying most of your life to hide your true self and you finnaly understand that your autisic. (I got diagnosed at 33) he also told me the newer generation are a lot more acceptable when it comes to things like that. I am so lucky to have found someone that gets me and im finnaly able to slowly take down the mask. Sorry for the long comment my husband is my only friend. I love your videos
His definitely not wrong, you should be able to enjoy what you want and enjoying it is great 😋😋 I totally understand that feeling but you should enjoy it
Thanks for making this video! I use to be annoyed when some teachers ( not all) would treat me a certain way when they found out I had a disability. Also, just in general as a young person I get tired of being treated like a little kid and I'm in my 20s LoL. Glad there are some people who treat me like an a adult. P.S. Reid is very cute I agree XD.
@@StyleboyEsposito Oh yes I know the feeling. Despite being disabled we should still be treated like adults and not delicate goods like my friend said. I was told once ( also due to having a disability) that we don't know what we feel in regards to being gay. I mean yeah figuring out your gay can be hard mentally but pretty sure we know what we like more than the other LoL. Also, yes Reid is 😘😋. Like those types sometimes.
@@djvinylgoblin omg I'm so sorry someone said that to you, you are valid within your sexuality and your disability ✨ and oooh yaass thays is so true, I see that too
With the fidget toys now at my school since there only 150 something kids in who school , everyone knows everyone and alot I mean alot us us is diagnosed with anxiety and ADHD autism etc. and the school knows this so almost all class room has fidget toys in a box infront the class if you want one and I love that ☺️ and yes it a public school and it that small lol
people just straight up refuse to treat me like im human. i am not a baby, i am not a dog, i am not a child. i fucking hate it. im just tired of trying to prove that im a sentient human being for so long and STILL being treated like shit
i do love big bang theory though , its just funny as hell, and that show is a comedy, i think the drama movies are worse at disabled folks because they are trying to show them in a more '' serious'' - as in not in a fun way, but they associate that child like adult in a drama movie, especially with the added icing on the cake '' pity'' * gag me* but so many movies really show disabled in a pity image as well as child like and somewhat incompetent
@@StyleboyEsposito i actually own a ton of '' gimp movies'' i hada friend, Marcy , she was CP and legally blind, she collected movies and she had a ton of films with disabled characters, i can tell you the list, (ill do that this evening), they are fun movies and are pretty good, but yes i do wish theyd show disabled adults, in a more dynamic light, especially the lifetime movies of the 80s and 90s, my god, every disabled character was portrayed in a very childlike way, even actual children are usually portrayed in a more dignified manner than that, ffs
okay, liked and subbed ! you had me at okay o gotta loose the glasses now they make me look for fuckin gay '' ( comingfrom the flaming gay guy lmao i love it, and i relate, i have been treated like a child - not just a child but an incompetent incapable child because i have a couple of learning disabilities, at my job no less ! i worked in the lab at UVM microscopy lab for almost 5 years when i lived up north, and as skilled as i was and how people constantly commented on my high skills in the sciences in general and at my work at hand: people still treated and talked to me in that preschool teachjer voice, well it was only 2 co-=workers, but still it was pretty intense one even used to pat me on the head, i pulled her aside and told her real quick that i will not tolerate it, she laughed it off as ''cute'' so i got the boss and talked to her again, only then did this crap curb, no it didnt completely stop,m this woman was insufferable. lol but yeah, i was like bruh, my IQ is 127, okay ? okay, i have a processing disorder, reading comprehension and math issues, but if yous how me visually / physically what to do, i catch on faster than most folks do and i can do the task to perfection, so yes very relatable .
why thank you for liking and subbing 😋 but oooh that sounds so patronising and frustrating to deal with so good on you for saying stop and getting your boss to talk about it with her 👏🏻
I swear infantilization from neurotypicals is the one thing keeping me from completely unmasking. Like.. When people find out I'm autistic and start treating me like a child, I feel compelled to double my camouflaging efforts and prove how much of an experienced, invulnerable, jaded, cynical, seen-it-all, uninnocent and totally un-childlike adult I am.
I'm 21. I have physical and psychological traits that people usually relate with childhood, I'm short and have a high pitch, I'm "innocent" and am not very socially intelligent. But I've also gone through a lot of experiences, I've independized earlier than most people I know. I'm smarter than most people when it comes to more intellectual reasoning. I'm a very good med student even when I had no support from my family, was going through various mental illnesses and had to work to sustain myself. Regardless of all of that, people keep treating me as if I were twelve. I don't want you to infantilize me. I don't want you to assume I won't understand that. I don't want you to do everything for me. I just want you to ask me if I need help
Stuff like Sheldon Cooper is the reason why I refused to accept I'm autistic for so long. That and the fact that I already get treated like a child, because I'm a 1,57m (5'2") guy, and people literally seem to just forget they're talking to a grown a$s man in the middle of conversation... I've been through more in the 21 years of my life, than most people go through ever, and yet people keep talking to me like I'm clueless... It makes me feel like I really do just need that stoic, cold mask on all the time, so people actually take me somewhat seriously.
Neurotypical’s forget that us autistic people have different personalities just like they do. When I in my 20s my family infantilize me because so enjoyed cartoons and comics and still do? To be fair, it took me a while to be able to financially take care of myself. In a lot of ways I internal infantilize myself.
i have not thrown up for like 10 or something years. but if i experience the kind of infantilisation where people use *the voice,* i will probably be tasting my own bile that day god i'm sorry to people who get treated like that
Thank you! I'm tired of everyone treating me like I'm some little kid. I'm 22, and while I admit I feel like a teenager and not an adult, I don't tell people I'm autistic (despite it being super obvious) because I don't want to risk someone only knowing autism through Rain Man and "inspirational" viral social media glurge about how wonderful it is that an autistic kid learned to use a spoon. I don't need help opening a bottle of soda, using the bathroom, or pushing the buttons on the elevator, thank you very much! (That was not directed at you but at the people who do this). If I'm lucky, their first thought is Sheldon Cooper (far from ideal, but at least it's a successful adult with a job and friends this time). If I'm terribly unlucky, they think of Chris Chan. I grew to hate him because in middle school some kids compared me to him when they found out I'm autistic. I unfortunately don't have the abilities to blend in and seem normal so I'm "obvious".
See that’s what hurts, like you can be fully comfortable in your identity because then you’re stuck with being treated like a child 😤 and then you don’t get support but then you risk the comments that leave you feeling like a stereotype
@@StyleboyEsposito Yes, 100% this! I try to be understanding to the neurotypicals who are well-intentioned and trying to make what they think are accommodations, I try to be polite and respectful towards them about it, but I get frustrated sometimes because even after explaining it, they still don't get it. An unfortunate nickname I had in middle school was Rain Woman because I always wear a raincoat (it's my thing, I've always loved wearing a raincoat and still to this day wear it almost like a dress). The really rude ones asked me if I wear a raincoat because I drool (I hate to admit it but I do have excessive saliva and have drooled on occasion, and it sometimes really affects my speech). My best friend who also has ASD is the only one who "gets" me but she's more able to navigate the NT world and helps me out a lot. She's five years younger than me but she's almost like a big sister figure sometimes (more than my actual big sisters were, but that comes down to age, I was born in 2001, my older sisters were born in 1976, 1982, and 1985 so there was an atypical sibling relationship with them). I noticed though I have a tendency to show off my intelligence, I always thought it was that I enjoy stuff and I want to share with others so they can experience the joy I did, but I wonder if a part of it is subconsciously trying to "prove" I'm not someone to pity. I don't try to be mean with flaunting my intelligence, though. I didn't know I was even doing it until someone pointed it out to me.
That and the fact I'm a late diagnosed women - I have mostly flown under the radar when I was unemployed since I was married and it was just too much effort to sign on. As someone who wasn't diagnosed I suspect it wouldn't have been believed even if I was when it came to accessing job-seekers benefits. I am a senior academic but I never for a minute believe that I cannot become unemployed again but jobseeking as an autistic person as a circle of hell and they do speak out of both sides of their mouth on help or the lack of it.
A lot of times I stim with a pacifier and when I'm in the hospital or group home, especially the staff openly mock me and make fun of me when all I'm trying to do is bring myself back to a state where I can function properly. It really sucks sometimes. No pun intended that I am ridiculed and thought lesser of just because I sometimes stem with my pacifier.
Spoiler alert for the new D&D movie: Xenk has some strong autistic traits (coming from a person who is on the spectrum), and he's the most bad@$$ character ever. 2nd favorite character in the movie (1st favorite goes to the pudgy dragon).
The part about fidgets was so relatable for me. Im autistic ( diagnosed recently ). I stim at school by shaking my pen or tapping on the table and I think both of those are more distracting than a fidget and they take up my writing hand cause it's the type of fine motor that I can't accomplish with my other hand. Also, I feel like people treat me like im stupid a lot??? Even before I was diagnosed people treated me like I was eiher stupid or a child, it might've had something to do with my issues talking? Idk. Humanity sucks a bit
Agghhhh I hate this, I have very mild high functioning autism which used to be called Asperger’s and I’m 25 and I don’t have a car or have a job just being honest. I have a lot of bad character but I don’t make it as an excuse at least. I own up for my actions and shortcomings so face it we can be assholes too! I get very angry when my family says I can’t on my own even though I have lies and made up the excuses. I also have other psychological problems as well such as Complex psychosomatic Issues I live with from me acting the victim and people pleaser in school. So don’t end up like me no matter if you have textbook Asperger’s or mild high functioning Asperger’s including other people with High Functioning forms of ASD so please talk to a therapist if you are having problems with self confidence or character in school or morals though I can understand for some of you it can be hard especially if not having a voice to express it at times or other co occurring conditions such as Generalized Anxiety OCD or OSDD’s etc. with it.
im on this program where people come in to help me and take me out and one girl comes in and shes like "whats ur favorite show" and im like "idk whats urs" and u know what she says? SHE SAYS BLUEY! don't get me wrong bluey is a great show and all but saying that to a 22 year old? i'm sure 22 year olds out there watch it too but like that's what you had to bring up? you couldn't of brought up shows that i used to watch as a kid? that was the least u could've brought up lol
I'm 31 and still get treated like a kid. It's extremely degrading. I've spent almost a decade working 55 hour weeks in blue collar jobs, bought 4 houses, two of which have no mortgages and I'm the landlord of them all.
I find it truly baffling as to what it takes for me personally to be seen as an adult.
Ooooh it's truly frustrating 🤦🏻♂️ I'm so sorry you have to go through that
@@StyleboyEsposito yeah it is. "Choir boy" was one of the terms for me apparently.
@@mrdojob oooh I didn't knooow
Wow after hearing your experience as a I know I might be given this shitty treatment as a history professor once I am a history professor from my students.
@@lisastade4992 Depends on demeanour I guess. I'm becoming more hardened and less inclined to take mockery but I haven't actually exposed myself enough to be on the receiving end of it too much recently.
It's honestly annoying to have shreds ripped into me by people who are one missed pay check away from relying on a food bank.
Another thing I get a lot of is people having a dig at my luck with women. A lot of them are no oil paintings themselves.
I might end up dishing out what I take next time something really annoys me.
People still call me cute and innocent without even knowing I’m autistic :(
It's not the worst, only if you don't like it and if it's repetitively over and over again ✨
This has happened to me too! My mother has known I'm autistic since I was first tested as a baby. She kept it a secret till I was diagnosed just last year. I am 44 this year and I have always been infantalized my whole life! Even by younger people. I was a nanny in college (I was 25) and a friend of the family was 14 and treated me like a child younger than her! I wonder if it's subliminal or something?
@@makichandes It is definitely subliminal. I’m 47 and male, and we have a 15 yr old girl volunteer at work. She treats me just like a child despite me not saying one word about being autistic.
@@makichandes I was the same . Parents were told I was autistic as a child .but kept it secret because they thought I would grow out of it or use it as an excuse . I was officially diagnosed in my late teens. And my parents told me they already knew . I feel betrayed to this very day .someone the other week tried to infantalise me and I told her I didn’t like her attitude .she tried to make me feel like I misunderstood her. Grrr people make me feel mad
bro that’s what i’m saying .😭
yeah , movies and tv shows when they have a developmental / cognitive or learning disabled character, they are almost always portrayed in a very simplistic, childlike immature, naive mind set and personality, very very rarely has any movie really showed a disabled character as a complex dynamic ADULT in which they were .
yesss i knoooow, we need them to be more complex and dynamic 👏🏻
My 25 year old co worker tried to high five me like I'm a special needs kid. I was 33..
Oooh that’s the worst 🤦🏻♂️ like we’re not five
Literally the worst thing ever. If anyone high fives me outta nowhere I SWEAR TO GOD
I had people patronising me treating me like am 5 years old and it’s very annoying, your video was absolutely amazing I’ve enjoyed every little bit of it🙂
Ooooh it's the worst 🤦🏻♂️ but I'm glad you enjoyed the video
My parents still treat me like a small child. I’m 27 and they won’t let me drive a car nor get a drivers license.
ooh that's so frustrating, i'm so sorry
Can you learn without their help? If you have then money then do it behind their backs.
Move out. Problem solved.
@@obitouchiha6439 um. Are you not aware of the economic state of America and how much houses cost now, even when you're renting? And it's even more difficult for a disabled person to move out since the disability system is a joke and jobs rarely pay a wage that match the prices of houses. You have to have very special circumstances and privilege in some areas to make it a lot of time. So saying "move out" as if he can just teleport out is kinda ignorant.
@@divamoosic Bold of you to assume that I have any privilege. I was born into a dirt poor family, but chose to get myself out of it before reaching my 20s. I got roommates, that's what my generation did when we became young adults to lighten the load in regards to rent.
Thank you thank you thank you! This is the reason I never tell people I’m autistic, even my own parents just don’t understand and have tried this with me before,but with them I’m able to shut it down more easily
But one of my friends, when I told them, they said “thanks for telling me that!” And we kept talking like normal, and it was the most validating thing ever
you're very welcome 💖 i know that feeling, it's very frustrating but i'm glad your friend validated you
Im a 27 Year old woman with ADD (ADHD inattentive) and currently in the process of getting my ASD diagnosis. THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I GET TREATED LIKE A FUCKN CHILD IS FUCKN INFURIATING 🤬 (sorry for the caps🤣) like there were times where some girls r like 3-4 years younger than me talk to me like a middle schooler BUT as soon as i say im 27 they’re like 😶 wtf i hate the fact sometimes no one takes me seriously 😔
OMG ISN'T IT ANNOYING 😳🤦🏻♂️ see you know my pain and that is so annoying
Ugh during my school years there were these kids who'd talk to me like I was a baby because I'm autistic!
Oooooh that's the worst 🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
I stumbled across this video while looking for a video talking about the infantilization of neurodivergent (more specifically autistic) coded characters, n it's shocking that you can see that ppl don't treat neurodivergent ppl seriously when they do the same thing with neurodivergent characters :(
I have experienced that a bit because of my ADHD, but it's mostly because I carry tiny toys on my backpack to fidget n play when I'm stressed (I'm in college), so ppl make fun of me n call me a baby. I really like hearing ppl with different neurodivergencies talking about their struggles, it helps me to understand the traits to make friends n write characters! Really liked your video! 😊
omg i knoow right, it's so frustrating and i hate how neurodivergent characters get treated like kids 🤦🏻♂️ i;m so sorry you go through that but i hope this helps at least a bit 😋 thank youuu
I feel this at work, and I now when they treat me like a child I just start acting like a child. Yes, I am autistic and nearing my 26th birthday. I’m also in college for nursing. I just found your channel and I love your energy, by the way.
i hate that, i'm so sorry you go through that, just know you're not alone and awe thank you 😋
I know a person with Down's syndrome that is very much like an eternal 12 year old. So many people treat her like she is 6 or 7, which is totally unfair because again, she is like a 12 year old and deserves some respect
yesss i agree, i know people with down syndrome and other disabilities also go through thisss
Even autistic kids are infantilized too much. I see it happen with my students all the time. Their allistic peers treat them like babies 😔
it's so frustrating and exhausting omg 😅
This video got me to subscribe I relate so much to everything here and it’s why I don’t want to tell people I’m autistic due to the “negative” and childlike stigma behind it I don’t want them to think any differently of me I just want them to know I’m slightly different that’s all
Awwee thank you so much :) and doesn't it such and make it hard.
As a person with autism, my mum keeps saying “You’re not autistic, you just need to socialize” LIKE BRUH, ITS LITERALLY NOT JUST AN ANTISOCIAL DISORDER- It is how the brain functions. I am somewhat non verbal ( have trouble pronouncing words or speaking sometimes ), and when people meet me they make fun of me and say “Awww! You made it all the way here!” Like, stop infantilitizing me. I’m fine in my head. They usually watch stereotypical movies like Music by Sia, Rain Man, and much more.
bye lol
omg stoopp people say that, omg that's so patronising, i'm so sorry and yesss, the sterotypes don't help art all
Darn that must be so frustrating for you :( Like what on earth, do they not realise having thoughts in your head and communicating them are two different things? It seems those people you met, while they might have the ability to communicate, they clearly aren't fine in the head like you are! Stay strong and kind, hanako! Don't listen to their meanness :(
@@ishaalimtiaz6715Hi! This is actually my old acc 😭 but my mum has gotten better at understanding autism in general, thankfully. Plus, I’m actually doing a lot better now! But thank you so much for the kind words, it really means a lot to me.
Honestly, at that point, it's best to give them nasty side eyes and then ask in a really concerned tone "Sir/Ma'am? Are you hallucinating? Am I a dog to you? Should I call an ambulance or something???"
My sister got diagnosed at 14/15. As soon as she got diagnosed, our whole family, particularly grandparents, started treating her like a child, speaking to her as if she couldn't understand them (for some context, she got a 9 in GCSE Maths, and is planning on becoming a Primary School Teacher). I think that they think they're being helpful, but it just feels horrible and infantilising. I'm really worried, because I'm on a waiting list for a diagnosis and I worry that they'll do it to me when I get diagnosed.
that fully sucks and its exhausting for her and can make you feel scared 🥺 i'd say remind her and yourself that you're both adults are caple of anything, you can do this and it's their small minds, not your existence
I'm 23, and I made the mistake of applying for handicapped support. I have Autism too. I immediately got infantilized by those, not one, but TWO psychiatrists who tried to talk further education out of me. They were all like "But you went to this school, you will not hack it here" bla di bla deh blah...
when I go to University, I won't apply for handicapped support anymore. I hate talking to mental health professionals, because I made the experience that I got infantilized by mental health professionals themselves. And I'm sick of it. The best therapy for me is sitting at home, playing Minecraft and cuddling with my cats, than going somewhere after work, when I'm exhausted af, where I don't even want to be.
awee i'm so sorry and yeah i get that, it is mentally exhausting sometimes to constantly talk about it and then be infantilized, definitely take care of yourself
There's a real issue in uni that most teachers, no matter how nice and good they are, refuse to give you the support you need, even if you have a paper FROM YOUR DOCTOR explaining the situation. A colleague sent a document requesting to make her tests in a different room because she can't concentrate with classroom noise. Technically she has this, but everytime the professors say "we don't have anyone to watch you and make sure you won't cheat". I asked to give presentations to the professors only, not in front of class, no one lets me do that. All of these things are allowed by law, but good luck getting it.
"How was I infantilized as a kid"? Because kids get treated like younger kids all the time, especially disabled kids. There's a reason why it's called "infantilization" and not "kid-ization".
that's so trueeeee!!!!!
Autistic here, and my experiences were actually the opposite! I was usually seen as a demon or a problem child. I would actually wish people would see me as innocent so they would protect me and be gentle with me, instead of bullying me. 😢 “Cute” and “Innocent” I tend to read as someone approachable, lovely and non threatening. Traits I want to be.
There is even a character I relate to - Elias Ainsworth from the anime The Ancient Magus Bride. Elias wants to learn and understand people, but he’s a demonic fae with the skull of a wolf and people are afraid of him.
oooh I've heard that a lot of autistic people go through that and I'm so sorry you go through that 🥺 that sucks and is so emotionally draining
I kinda have that same problem too. and what's worse.
Is that the "state" and or "system" can legally take away some people's rights.
and you don't have to do anything wrong.
some adults still have rights taken away while being judged.
anyone in your situation probably need to leave. and Never be found again.
Thank you for talking about this, I've noticed several times that after I would tell coworkers that I am autistic, they'd start acting different. It was never anything super obvious, or at least not super obvious to me, but it is still very annoying and disheartening to know that telling someone I am autistic could lead to them seeing me as less than, and like a child instead of the adult I am.
I’ve been in university for 2.5 years now and I am still being treated like a 5 year old. At this rate, I would like to have a 1 on 1 confrontation, but I have not been able to do so because I’m super hesitant and weary on how the said people would react to it.
oh that's the worst, i'm so so sorry that's the worst, i get why you would be wary, i'd feel the same but i do feel like saying something is a good thing 💖 you deserve to be treated with respect
Its funny today I had a dog training class (I am a dog trainer) and I was telling the owners about this movie I watched its called 100% wolf 🐺 good movie btw anywho I got really excited and was hand flapping and when I later got into the car and was talking to my husband and was like is it weird that I watched kid cartoons? He said it dosnt matter what they think be who you are! You been trying most of your life to hide your true self and you finnaly understand that your autisic. (I got diagnosed at 33) he also told me the newer generation are a lot more acceptable when it comes to things like that. I am so lucky to have found someone that gets me and im finnaly able to slowly take down the mask. Sorry for the long comment my husband is my only friend. I love your videos
His definitely not wrong, you should be able to enjoy what you want and enjoying it is great 😋😋 I totally understand that feeling but you should enjoy it
@@StyleboyEsposito thank you 😊 🙏
Good movie btw
Thanks for making this video! I use to be annoyed when some teachers ( not all) would treat me a certain way when they found out I had a disability. Also, just in general as a young person I get tired of being treated like a little kid and I'm in my 20s LoL. Glad there are some people who treat me like an a adult. P.S. Reid is very cute I agree XD.
Oooh it's the worst 🤦🏻♂️ so you know the feeling and isn't he just 😋
@@StyleboyEsposito Oh yes I know the feeling. Despite being disabled we should still be treated like adults and not delicate goods like my friend said. I was told once ( also due to having a disability) that we don't know what we feel in regards to being gay. I mean yeah figuring out your gay can be hard mentally but pretty sure we know what we like more than the other LoL. Also, yes Reid is 😘😋. Like those types sometimes.
@@djvinylgoblin omg I'm so sorry someone said that to you, you are valid within your sexuality and your disability ✨ and oooh yaass thays is so true, I see that too
With the fidget toys now at my school since there only 150 something kids in who school , everyone knows everyone and alot I mean alot us us is diagnosed with anxiety and ADHD autism etc. and the school knows this so almost all class room has fidget toys in a box infront the class if you want one and I love that ☺️ and yes it a public school and it that small lol
Aweeee yesss why is your school so goood 😋 like that's amazing
people just straight up refuse to treat me like im human. i am not a baby, i am not a dog, i am not a child. i fucking hate it. im just tired of trying to prove that im a sentient human being for so long and STILL being treated like shit
eeww why do people treat you less than human 😳 that's so annoying i'm so sorry, and i swear trying to prove to everyone is the most exhausting thing
i do love big bang theory though , its just funny as hell, and that show is a comedy, i think the drama movies are worse at disabled folks because they are trying to show them in a more '' serious'' - as in not in a fun way, but they associate that child like adult in a drama movie, especially with the added icing on the cake '' pity'' * gag me* but so many movies really show disabled in a pity image as well as child like and somewhat incompetent
i agree with the drama movies doing this, it's so frustrating and really demoralizing 🤦🏻♂️
@@StyleboyEsposito i actually own a ton of '' gimp movies'' i hada friend, Marcy , she was CP and legally blind, she collected movies and she had a ton of films with disabled characters, i can tell you the list, (ill do that this evening), they are fun movies and are pretty good, but yes i do wish theyd show disabled adults, in a more dynamic light, especially the lifetime movies of the 80s and 90s, my god, every disabled character was portrayed in a very childlike way, even actual children are usually portrayed in a more dignified manner than that, ffs
okay, liked and subbed ! you had me at okay o gotta loose the glasses now they make me look for fuckin gay '' ( comingfrom the flaming gay guy lmao
i love it, and i relate, i have been treated like a child - not just a child but an incompetent incapable child because i have a couple of learning disabilities, at my job no less ! i worked in the lab at UVM microscopy lab for almost 5 years when i lived up north, and as skilled as i was and how people constantly commented on my high skills in the sciences in general and at my work at hand: people still treated and talked to me in that preschool teachjer voice, well it was only 2 co-=workers, but still it was pretty intense one even used to pat me on the head, i pulled her aside and told her real quick that i will not tolerate it, she laughed it off as ''cute'' so i got the boss and talked to her again, only then did this crap curb, no it didnt completely stop,m this woman was insufferable. lol but yeah, i was like bruh, my IQ is 127, okay ? okay, i have a processing disorder, reading comprehension and math issues, but if yous how me visually / physically what to do, i catch on faster than most folks do and i can do the task to perfection, so yes very relatable .
why thank you for liking and subbing 😋 but oooh that sounds so patronising and frustrating to deal with so good on you for saying stop and getting your boss to talk about it with her 👏🏻
I swear infantilization from neurotypicals is the one thing keeping me from completely unmasking. Like.. When people find out I'm autistic and start treating me like a child, I feel compelled to double my camouflaging efforts and prove how much of an experienced, invulnerable, jaded, cynical, seen-it-all, uninnocent and totally un-childlike adult I am.
i completely get that, i feel that exactly, like having to prove how much of an adult i am and it's so frustrating 🥺
I'm 21. I have physical and psychological traits that people usually relate with childhood, I'm short and have a high pitch, I'm "innocent" and am not very socially intelligent. But I've also gone through a lot of experiences, I've independized earlier than most people I know. I'm smarter than most people when it comes to more intellectual reasoning. I'm a very good med student even when I had no support from my family, was going through various mental illnesses and had to work to sustain myself.
Regardless of all of that, people keep treating me as if I were twelve. I don't want you to infantilize me. I don't want you to assume I won't understand that. I don't want you to do everything for me. I just want you to ask me if I need help
you're a multi-faceted human and i get that, you want to be treated as an equal you know
It's almost 2024. High time this treatment of the autistic was called out. Neurotypicals need to upgrade their understanding.
TELL IT TO THE BAAACCCKKKKK
my fucking MOM thinks I'm gullible and can't be relied on to make good choices without allistic assistance and oh my fucking GODS am I sick of it
The video that everyone needs to watch! Listen up people!!!!!
Awwee thank you so much 🥰
Stuff like Sheldon Cooper is the reason why I refused to accept I'm autistic for so long.
That and the fact that I already get treated like a child, because I'm a 1,57m (5'2") guy, and people literally seem to just forget they're talking to a grown a$s man in the middle of conversation...
I've been through more in the 21 years of my life, than most people go through ever, and yet people keep talking to me like I'm clueless...
It makes me feel like I really do just need that stoic, cold mask on all the time, so people actually take me somewhat seriously.
oooh i get that and oh gosh noooo 😳 see that's even worse, and that is so annoying, you don't have to be that why for people to take you serious
Neurotypical’s forget that us autistic people have different personalities just like they do. When I in my 20s my family infantilize me because so enjoyed cartoons and comics and still do? To be fair, it took me a while to be able to financially take care of myself. In a lot of ways I internal infantilize myself.
I'm surprised you haven't blown up yet tbh
Your so sweet and funny 🙂
Awee thank you 😋
@@StyleboyEsposito your welcome 😄😄😄
i have not thrown up for like 10 or something years. but if i experience the kind of infantilisation where people use *the voice,*
i will probably be tasting my own bile that day
god i'm sorry to people who get treated like that
Thank you! I'm tired of everyone treating me like I'm some little kid. I'm 22, and while I admit I feel like a teenager and not an adult, I don't tell people I'm autistic (despite it being super obvious) because I don't want to risk someone only knowing autism through Rain Man and "inspirational" viral social media glurge about how wonderful it is that an autistic kid learned to use a spoon. I don't need help opening a bottle of soda, using the bathroom, or pushing the buttons on the elevator, thank you very much! (That was not directed at you but at the people who do this). If I'm lucky, their first thought is Sheldon Cooper (far from ideal, but at least it's a successful adult with a job and friends this time). If I'm terribly unlucky, they think of Chris Chan. I grew to hate him because in middle school some kids compared me to him when they found out I'm autistic. I unfortunately don't have the abilities to blend in and seem normal so I'm "obvious".
See that’s what hurts, like you can be fully comfortable in your identity because then you’re stuck with being treated like a child 😤 and then you don’t get support but then you risk the comments that leave you feeling like a stereotype
@@StyleboyEsposito Yes, 100% this! I try to be understanding to the neurotypicals who are well-intentioned and trying to make what they think are accommodations, I try to be polite and respectful towards them about it, but I get frustrated sometimes because even after explaining it, they still don't get it. An unfortunate nickname I had in middle school was Rain Woman because I always wear a raincoat (it's my thing, I've always loved wearing a raincoat and still to this day wear it almost like a dress). The really rude ones asked me if I wear a raincoat because I drool (I hate to admit it but I do have excessive saliva and have drooled on occasion, and it sometimes really affects my speech). My best friend who also has ASD is the only one who "gets" me but she's more able to navigate the NT world and helps me out a lot. She's five years younger than me but she's almost like a big sister figure sometimes (more than my actual big sisters were, but that comes down to age, I was born in 2001, my older sisters were born in 1976, 1982, and 1985 so there was an atypical sibling relationship with them).
I noticed though I have a tendency to show off my intelligence, I always thought it was that I enjoy stuff and I want to share with others so they can experience the joy I did, but I wonder if a part of it is subconsciously trying to "prove" I'm not someone to pity. I don't try to be mean with flaunting my intelligence, though. I didn't know I was even doing it until someone pointed it out to me.
I’m 37, I try not to tell everyone I on the autistic spectrum or have ADHD.
That’s how it is in my school. It sucks.
I know it does and it’s frustrating
Wow I LOVE your vibe :) in just the first 30 seconds I subscribed
aweee thank you so much 🥰
That and the fact I'm a late diagnosed women - I have mostly flown under the radar when I was unemployed since I was married and it was just too much effort to sign on. As someone who wasn't diagnosed I suspect it wouldn't have been believed even if I was when it came to accessing job-seekers benefits.
I am a senior academic but I never for a minute believe that I cannot become unemployed again but jobseeking as an autistic person as a circle of hell and they do speak out of both sides of their mouth on help or the lack of it.
A lot of times I stim with a pacifier and when I'm in the hospital or group home, especially the staff openly mock me and make fun of me when all I'm trying to do is bring myself back to a state where I can function properly.
It really sucks sometimes. No pun intended that I am ridiculed and thought lesser of just because I sometimes stem with my pacifier.
oh that sucks 🥺 especially because that's something to soothe you and people mocking you hurts
Spoiler alert for the new D&D movie:
Xenk has some strong autistic traits (coming from a person who is on the spectrum), and he's the most bad@$$ character ever. 2nd favorite character in the movie (1st favorite goes to the pudgy dragon).
oooh i might have to see it now 😋
The part about fidgets was so relatable for me. Im autistic ( diagnosed recently ). I stim at school by shaking my pen or tapping on the table and I think both of those are more distracting than a fidget and they take up my writing hand cause it's the type of fine motor that I can't accomplish with my other hand. Also, I feel like people treat me like im stupid a lot??? Even before I was diagnosed people treated me like I was eiher stupid or a child, it might've had something to do with my issues talking? Idk. Humanity sucks a bit
Omg I love your glasses!
hehehe thank you 😋
Agghhhh I hate this, I have very mild high functioning autism which used to be called Asperger’s and I’m 25 and I don’t have a car or have a job just being honest. I have a lot of bad character but I don’t make it as an excuse at least. I own up for my actions and shortcomings so face it we can be assholes too! I get very angry when my family says I can’t on my own even though I have lies and made up the excuses. I also have other psychological problems as well such as Complex psychosomatic Issues I live with from me acting the victim and people pleaser in school. So don’t end up like me no matter if you have textbook Asperger’s or mild high functioning Asperger’s including other people with High Functioning forms of ASD so please talk to a therapist if you are having problems with self confidence or character in school or morals though I can understand for some of you it can be hard especially if not having a voice to express it at times or other co occurring conditions such as Generalized Anxiety OCD or OSDD’s etc. with it.
im on this program where people come in to help me and take me out and one girl comes in and shes like "whats ur favorite show" and im like "idk whats urs" and u know what she says? SHE SAYS BLUEY! don't get me wrong bluey is a great show and all but saying that to a 22 year old? i'm sure 22 year olds out there watch it too but like that's what you had to bring up? you couldn't of brought up shows that i used to watch as a kid? that was the least u could've brought up lol
Thank you. God bless
You’re welcome 😇