I’m a bit older and I thought I could date older men because I’m older too well the same thing happened down right abusive 56 I was so disappointed I stop dating over a year working on myself
Sis>>I feel your pain! I'm STILL Healing & Undoing the Programming/Conditioning from the Trauma of being with a "grown-boy" who was 14 years older than Me...LESSON LEARNED
Most older men trying to live through these youngster women. They've lived there lives already. If u asked me, most of them going through midlife crisis and don't want to accept that they getting older.
That's true. I've met older men with children trying to date me and IL be thinking like you want me to be a stepmom. They think it's normal. They had their time and need to look for someone in a similar situation
You are correct. The old man I married did this to me. That was a horrifying experience. I'd not EVER encourage a young woman under 30 to marry an old man. The imbalances between them are just too great. I was 23 when I married that guy, and we had a child. My pregnancy was high risk, so age makes no difference in that aspect either.
@@riorio-rt1oq that's part of the reason. But the truth is men are not as mature as women so when we get with a chick our age or older, we try our best to keep them and spend our time tryna fulfill the expectations and have to protect you and pay for everything while if I'm with a younger chick, she is emotionally gonna chase me because I'm more mature than men her age. So I can spend my time on my goals n other shit without worrying what I should do 24/7 to please her so she wont leave me for a better man.
As a woman in her 20’s. Ive realised that they tend to gravitate towards us only sexually. Otherwise every woman will be snapped up by 25 but it’s rarely the case. I’ve dated older men and I realise that their ex wives are much older and the ones who recently married. Married women 28+. So I’m not sure. 🤷🏽♀️ I’m starting to think this is a myth. I looked at studies and women in the west aren’t married until 28-35+ on average. So when we say prefer young, in what way? Because it is very important to know. Being viewed as desirable for only sexual activities isn’t a compliment to me.
They are predators. Older men like that purposely go for someone younger bc they can control them financially and emotionally. Women their own age can see through the bs and don’t want to be with a manchild
@@amarjotsingh8455 The gag is, those types of men do not tend to have a lot of money? I guess it’s about who the little money that they have can spread the furthest with?
@@ninapeterson275 Yea But still the average 35 year old man is still more established than a 22 year old women who just got out of college and is figuring out her life. The older man in the situation (on average) still has some sort of house, cars, savings etc and a lot of times older men sabotage younger women careers bc they are jealous of a woman bettering herself to where eventually she can make more etc. overall they are predators
It's not a compliment...It's disgusting...I have nieces your age and I would be horrified if they showed up with a man my age...Men use younger women as symbols of their dying youth...I avoided older men in my twenties because they behaved all creepy and predatory...Gross...
Getting old is inevitable; Maturation is a choice. Apostle Paul said when I was a child I thought as a child, spoke as a child, understood as a child but when I became a man I put away childish things.
That is so true but some men remain as children because of their upbringing. There’s a man who is in his sixties but has the mentality of a twelve year old boy.
It started for me when I was 17 or 18. One man looked like he was in his 80s. It's still happening and I am 29. I need to be more aggressive because it is downright disrespectful and predatory.
@@Yahkeam Compared to guys in their 30s and beyond, 22 is a child. There has to be something perverted about a man looking for intimacy with a woman young enough to be his daughter.
I had a friend 46 telling me he can’t stand women his age because they’re angry unhappy etc married a women 27 and now his wife and him have these fights where he had the nerve to try to use me to cover something up and I didn’t allow it and lost a lot of respect for him
“He is a pervert” 😂😂😂the way you delivered that . HILLARIOUS! And yes! …You hit on the the nail. We think that older men are wise, secure , powerful and that they will provide some sort of safety. The safety that most likely we didn’t received from a fatherless childhood . A bit late but i learnt my lesson. Now I want to work on myself and hopefully God will place the right man in my life when and if the time is right !
I was 18 dating a 36 year old man. I dated him for year and half and I remember having self doubt about everything I did. When I called it off he kept coming back. I didn’t know it was a soul tie until later on. When I turned 20 I started dating a 46 year old man. He approached me and convinced me he was different. Coming to find out he was married and was having sex with his wife, his baby mama as well as me. I learned my lesson with both men. Both men gaslight me, manipulated money from me, used me and hurt me emotionally and verbally.
Some of these older women are too bitter and have lost the capacity to love unconditionally and let go. I'm unhappy with that, that's why I have been dating a younger woman for the last two years. Marriage next on the agenda.. Personality and maturity says a lot....
I was dating someone 17 years older than I was. Conclusion. I had daddy issues and I was inspired my his finances, after doing some growing and healing, I came to find out , that he was a lost soul and was broken from his divorce and couldn’t take the fact that he didn’t have his children 24/7 anymore. The best you could do for yourself is to keep working on you.
I’m 19 and I have had men in their 30’s-40’s every week contacting me trying to pay me for pictures. I go on their FB pages and they have wives and kids! I block them immediately, but it’s just sad that you would feel attracted to someone who is in the same grade as one of your children! Disgusting! Young women get a man who is close in age with you. You and your partner should grow together.
@@LA-wv7gf Same Way They Got My Ex-Fiance 😔 Good Bless You Mama My Ex Mother In Law.... Told Me She's A Woman Now & Can Have Sex With Whoever She Wants Now "Legally" Because We're 19 I'm So Hurt
Well said. My husband is sleeping with a young woman the same age as his daughters…he’s 34 years older than her. It’s sick and it’s destroyed everything they’ve ever known about their father.
Tony, not lying I divorced my older husband almost a year ago he was running circles around me .. I was young & dumb &couldn’t see through muddy water!
You do understand that the older a man gets the more developed his brain is right? Even if you dated a guy your age that doesn't mean when he's older he'll be the same as he was. Maybe women should stop choosing the wrong men instead of bringing an entire age group down.
@@onesolejeanius3498 It's ridiculous when these women give the "Young and dumb excuse" if he was such a bad guy then why did they choose to stay with him? And you're both adults. There's no excuses. Men are the natural leaders in a relationship. It's natural that a younger woman would want an older man. Can't believe she divorced him just because of his age.
This is true! My ex-husband was 11 years older than I. His first wife was only four years younger than him and he would comment that he had to teach her to do everything! I was naive but had spiritual grandparents. As I matured in the LORD I saw clearly how stagnant he remained. They are abusive, mean, condescending, controlling, and worse. It won’t last because if it is not Godly, it won’t grow!!! I could write a book and one of my goals (after 20 years, with only my children to show as blessings) is to warn women that you don’t want that energy!!! Don’t procrastinate and become spiritually famished!!! You can never get time back!!!
I think that in today's society two people should have to qualify before getting married. It is terrible how fast and easy so many get married. I come across married women often and I can tell good and well when they are hunting for someone on the side.
No lies been told!!! I knew a guy he was 56 y/o, he was into me and I am 28 y/o. He told me he only dates females between 23-27 y/o...😩😩😩 I call that a pervert 😒🤦🏽♀️.
Its an ego thing they are getting older and unattractive and having a woman half their age who is more attractive than they are is a self esteem boost. Plus they cannot keep women their own age they won't put up with their grown boy behavior, wandering eye, etc.
I like older men but all that you are saying is true. But I have always stood on my own two feet and never back down from my beliefs. They always stop dealing with me bc I’m too independent and I talk back a lot 🤣
Honestly it's disgusting when I see an old man trying to make his move and in my mind I'm thinking, "Lord Jesus this person is older than my dad not to mention my grandfather," it's disgusting on so many levels and to think they don't see anything wrong with it is disturbing. Had this one grinning all the time on my way to work even offered to give me his numbers and would basically harass me for my numbers everyday then one day I snapped when I realised he thought I was playing when I refused to give out my numbers when I tell you he got in line chile - disgusting.
@Wise4Sure 😅😅😅😅😅😅....Idk...Maybe I just don't pay attention to they creepy selves!😅😅😅...Even at at 40, I still would feel creeped out if a 60 year old tried to flirt!
an 80 yr old in my neighborhood creeped on me for 3 yrs since i moved here. nobody would believe how perverted and controlling he was to me. he made friends with everyone in the neighborhood while tormenting me. hed take me out to eat and convince me he was my only real friend and told me hed nibble my ear rub my feet and if he was 50yrs younger hed marry me. one time he made me get in his car when i was at the beach, go to a restaurant and told me he was falling in love with me. now i cant walk down the street cause i dont want to be harassed or obsessed over by him
@@scaldon2 Then maybe start making women under 25 wives? It’s rarely happening enough according to studies. Then you blame women for it. Do you have a young wife or kids yourself?
@@scaldon2 Lol it does not matter what men can have. It’s women who choose who procreates not men. And no one is choosing an old man unless he is super rich. Also, women push out the babies. Pregnancy is difficult. What 60 year old woman wants a baby at 60? Even if it could happen most wouldn’t want to 😂😂😂
You telling the truth Tony. Don't play yourself into believing that the older man has more to offer because you will be surprised down the road. In most cases they have motives which extend long-term like someone to care for them later in life while you're left feeling burdened and resentful because you are still able to "Dip It and Do It" When you are younger it seems cute. But wait until you get older but his older is way older than yours and things start getting outta balance. Also it is true, older men cheat on younger women too. So don't get it twisted. When he's strictly looking for much younger, it's not a compliment like you're winning. Remember, "Time Is Undefeated" 💯
Wow I just said this!!! I met a guy recently he looked about 45… I figured so. But he told me he’s 39. He later revealed that he lied because he thought I wouldn’t talk to him. Lol my ex is 44… that didn’t go so well because he didn’t have it all together either. Older don’t mean wiser.
Most of them are broke and broken. They made terrible financial choices in their lifetime. Then they would deceive you into thinking that the county’s financial situation is in decline and they are the only ones with financial security in town. They’d blame it on Trudeau and would coded-ly ask if you were sexually pure and would stare down at that cute young blonde I was staring at. He claimed to be 71 but he looked like a walking corpse. I’m only 18 by the way and that shit about women leaving their prime even at 22 😂 will only leave them in the hands of deranged men. But if I were honest, it’s not about age, some young men are just as bad and show the signs that when they get older, they’d be chasing younger women like our living forefathers are doing. Women should stay away from these type of men. We should go for men that like us for who we are not just our youth. I’m not promoting late marriage, but don’t let these immature 30 year olds or living corpses deceive you.
🙏 thank you, thank you, thank you for explaining this with such clarity. I am 12 years younger than my husband and as I matured during our 12 year relationship and broke from his control, he found a girl 22 years his junior to cheat with. I found her and we talked and we both realized she was just as naive as I was when he found me. We supported each other and let the world know who he truly was. Now I’m looking after me and I have a new friend too. Women, stop attacking other women, your man is the problem!
I agree with you to an extent, because every man has his own agenda when it comes to seeking women. What caught my attention in your post is the mentioning of the 12-year age difference between you and your ex. I recently turned 35 and a 23 year old woman is the youngest I'd go when it comes to dating. I'm also open to dating older women, but they can't be more than three years older than me at this point. Keep in mind I am not married and don't have kids.
Please leave him. All of you. I wasted age 18-23 with a grown boy 11 years older than me. Any accomplishment you make, he will be resentful. He kept trying to trap me with a kid. Over 5 years, he went from a "good man" to verbal abuu, emotional abuu, then eventually physical abuu. Leave b4 it's too late. You are the prize. Watch all Tony's video and read the books. I wish i had this knowledge at that age. I would not have stayed past a year.
Rule number 1 don’t rub your accomplishments in a man’s face. You are emasculating him by doing so and naturally he will be resentful. Let the man provide and lead and just relax into your femininity.
What A Word!!! Deliverance in 30 minutes!! That's all I dated were older men, because my Dad was much older than my Mom and he took care of his family. But as I look back, both parents went through heart ache and their marriage failed after 32 years of marriage. My relationships failed of dating older men. I did not need a Daddy, I had a good father. I needed a good man!!! Tony, keep being used of God!!
me too i think i try to get with older men who remind me of my dad but my dad was always there. but the older men ive been with always proved to be immature
Once I dated a man that was ten years older than me. He would speak down on me. Telling me I didn’t know any better, he’s been there done that, etc. Never again! I want to grow with someone not a surrogate father.
It depends on the individual. A grown boy and a mature man differs. Yet, one can’t say that it is solemnly due to “control”. However, the reality is that it doesn’t apply to all.
@Chan Britt she’s one of those “fashionista” types that tony is talking about so I wouldn’t take her too seriously. Just bc a man is older with some money it doesn’t mean they are high value
@Chan Britt In my culture, it is common for Congolese and Angolan women tend to marry older men hence. It’s about the individual, as Tony Gaskin said : there is a difference between a grown boy and a man.
@@amarjotsingh8455 Ah beg you pardon? I think we are all entitled to share our opinions. And even if, we agree or disagree, let us respect each other. There’s no need to categories or insult a person you do not know. Have a blessed evening.
When my husband met me I was later 20's he was 36, I was far ahead with maturity , education and life goals . But this man was far ahead of me with Emotional and mental Manipulation till this day. I didnt see it coming each and every time he pulled his slick moves, then hide hands. Listen to Tony ladies...
You ain’t lying the narc I was with is now with a 21 yr old girl and he’s 38.... 17 yrs difference.....I looked at him and started laughing when I found out her age he was furious with me bc he wanted me to feel jealous.... Not jealous of a child potna bye 🐦 🧠
@@joannasmith2670 He have her right where he wants her, she has family and older sisters they can tell her better but he prolly manipulated them too... I’m sure she is a hot in the ass girl bc real mothers would’ve been caught on to protect their kids from ppl like this
@@LA-wv7gf No there is 17 yrs age difference between him and her.... I was just stating that his son is 17 and how would his son look at his dad talking to a girl 21yrs old
They can’t impress or do enough for women their age so they seek younger women or he’s still in the party stage(even though he’s older) and he doesn’t take life or relationships seriously. He can be behind in life
(SIGH) 🙄 So then according to YOU …older men actually PREFER old women …but since he can’t “impress” his “preference” he (SIGH) reluctantly just acquiesces and SETTLES for a younger; hotter; purer; more feminine; less run-through; less jaded; less experienced; more fertile YOUNGER woman? 🤔 Oh those poor sad men ☹️ who have to SETTLE for young women after they get “rejected? …by the OLD post-wall women. Must SUCK! 😢
Most of them want to groom young girls. When your young your less focus on commitment and your naive. Your more impressionable and easy to manipulate!! When I was 20 I was with a 37 year old man and got pregnant. Lawwwwd if I could go back and change it I wouldn’t cuz I have my daughter and she perfect but I wish I would of did things differently. And also men who date younger, really can’t find women there age who would even find them attractive/ will put with there childish ways.
This is truth. I was 19 dude was 44 and i have a son with him that he doesn’t take care of. I can’t change it however, i am getting closer and breaking chains by now every thing is making sense on why it occurred.
@@blackbeauty2781 I said what i said! & Yes, GROOM!! Obviously you need to further look up the definition of what groom means. When your young and especially a slow bloomer/ don’t really know how to date maybe because you weren’t allowed to under your parents roof and when your finally out on your own; no longer under your parents roof/protection.......your left to the wolves. Men can sense that and use that to there advantage. A man can make the young girl into who what he THINKS is a good woman and break her down till she’s weak/insecure and depends on him for approval because he’s “trained” her to be like that cuz she knows no better. Grooming means, “a form of abuse that involves manipulating someone until they're isolated, dependent, and more vulnerable to exploitation.“ or to “guide / making them into something”. Grooming has MANY different meanings, it just depends how you use it. For example Politicians, superstars, actors, business men/women, ect are all groomed to a certain image/role of something. Children are groomed by there parents. Your guiding that person to be someone you think they should be. It could be good or bad. & for a women to be attracted to man doesn’t necessarily mean only looks lol. That’s high school/grown girl thinking. To be attracted to someone takes a collective of things. There (personality, looks can be one, the way they think, there goals and ambitions. Ect.) Being attracted to someone is FAR from looks.
@@ElauntraSeoul .. How’d you get that response from my comment 🤷🏽♀️ and you also changed your wording and your immediate statement wasn’t that long lol 😒! My comment is not for the faint at heart or sensitivie individuals! And like I said, grown men are not in it to groom you.. Your life’s story wasn’t necessary hun
@@blackbeauty2781 yes I agree..I chase a 50 years man and im 37..but wanted marriage..he ghosted me..for a 25 I think that he moved in with and not married..when I was 20 I was mature and got ghosted a lot..long story short I have almost single forever..
Makes a lot of sense. Once that young woman matures in the BRAIN and leaves him...he’ll trade her in for a younger model who he can manipulate. & the cycle continues. 😂 It’s hilarious
Come onnn!!!! "If you want financial security... get on your grind; And while you're on your grind and you're in the fields working, like Ruth, you're gonna meet your Boaz!" A word 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I’m 30 and get hit on by older men all the time. I look a lot younger than I am and sometimes they look shocked (and slightly disappointed) when they find out my age. I was once turned on by this, but now that I’m a grown woman, I find it to be quite disgusting. Despicable.
I know a man in his early sixties that go after women in their twenties or early thirties!🤮 He said he does not want an old woman🥴. But he old though! He has daughters older than that!🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️. So wrong.
Don't judge all older men some are looking for something serious some men close to my age range act the same i don't find it wrong to like older men and want to get with em if they is want u like is more to a person than Just thier age
Amen . Man strength is in his gentleness. My husband was 12 years older than me. There was no baby/daddy mess between us. We respected each other. Being a survivor of the Vietnam War he was humble, sensitive, loving and patient. But don’t disrespect him or anyone is loved. And the people that new him knew not to cross him. I was very independent but he was sensitive to my needs and I was sensitive to his. And when his health started to deteriorate, I was there. Unfortunately, we both got Covid-19. He died in the hospital. I recovered at home. So my husband being 12 years older was good for me and a blessing. He died 7/31/20 at 76 the week of both our birthdays . July 27 and 28. I turned 64.
You have effectively described every man I've ever been seriously involved with. Every. Single. One. Insecure, immature, controlling, silly, old men. Gee, I wish I'd known about you years ago before I met these defective men. Thank you, Tony. Lord have mercy. Thank you.
no offense, but what does it say about you if you're attracting these type of men?! black parenting can be VERY TOXIC and leads to damaged kids who then become damaged adults. maybe you have to heal yourself until you truly love yourself, and will then begin projecting the energy that won't attract dusties. OR, maybe i'm just misassuming, and there's nothing wrong with you, and you just had a string of bad luck regarding dating. either way, hope you find the person you want in the future.
I was 21 dating a 56 year old man. Looking back on it i feel disgusted and repulsed but I honestly did not know any better and wish I could’ve loved myself and realized what I was doing. He was lacking control in his own life and that’s why he was attracted to me, because he knew he could control me. I thought he was different and an exception to the rule, but I found out the hard way that was not true. He exclusively dated girls 18-25 while being a literal old man. He was older than my dad but he gave me attention and told me things that made me feel like I mattered to someone meanwhile I was not even taking care of myself and doing the inner work and therapy I always needed. I now focus on working and getting my bag right, and spending time focusing on myself learning how to love myself first. No man could ever validate me anymore because I do that for myself. Anything an older man likes to promise he can give you are all things you can give to yourself if you do the work and love yourself first . Thank you for the video ❤️
I became a woman when I discovered where my strengths laid and it didn’t lay in me being tough but it laid in me being vulnerable. It was weird at first and I tried hard to fight it because I’ve always been a tough chick but eventually I accepted this is what being a woman is all about and let me tell you now that I felt the freedom of vulnerability and sensitivity of a woman I don’t give a damn what anyone say about me and I don’t need to be tough, right, perfect because there’s nothing more freeing than knowing as a woman you can cry, fuck up, be wrong, and get broken and still be a beautiful, gentle, loving woman and nothing and nobody can stop it, now that’s strength 🙄 I will die a single black proud mother before I ever let another grown ass boy disrespect me, because nigga, I’m worth it and I deserve to be loved correctly!🖕🏾
These men are not cultivated to know how to love women. Look at the community of men today. This is why so many women are building security on their own. We've all had enough with these man-child behaviors.
There's nothing wrong as a woman being feminine. This whole feminist agenda to make women men has warped women. Good for you. However, a bit of constructive criticism for you. Please don't use the kind of profanity you have in you're post. It's better to exercise more self control in how you speak and conduct yourself and will make you a better woman. Anyway, good luck to you in your growth.
I see it as insulting. Several men in range from 50s-70s have been interested and wondering why in their mind they would think a woman in her 30s would be interested in them.
@@nemoxx96xx58 lies younger woman are better in every aspect compared to a older woman they have way less baggage , they tend to be hotter and happier than older females.
I get approached by older men most of the time and since watching you I tell them they are too old for me. Most get offended or try to talk me out of it. And the 2 times where I went against the rule I realized I should have stuck with my first mind. No men more than 5 years older. No exceptions.
Older men have been approaching me since I was at least 18. I was never attracted to them. Last year, I tried giving one a chance. He was 15 years older. After a week, I just couldn’t do it anymore. The age difference caused me too much anxiety. The next time an older man approached me, I was honest with him when he kept being pushy. I told him, I’ve tried being with an older man, it wasn’t for me. I have heard Tony’s video, but I am open to 10 years at the most.
@@nessparadis6948 I definitely have learned this one for myself as well. One of the guys even tried to convince me that I'm not going to find a mature guy at my age 🤣 turns out he was just as immature as a guy my age & was actually married to make matters worse & lying about his age. I found all of this out within the first 3 days doing a little digging.
As a younger woman I’m sick of being hit on by old ass men. They even proposition with money. And I know too many other young women who use these guys while dating a guy their own age at the same time. Why don’t we stick to 5 years older/younger max? Because I don’t want an old guy but some really try to sell themselves with money. It’s not a real relationship. I think the 5 year older/younger rule is good
I am 20 and I only date men close to my age cause I find them more attractive and Most older men that find women in their early 20’s attractive tend to only obsesses over these girls no matter how old they are themselves, so even if he’s 20 years older than you, there will be a day when you won’t be young enough for his tastes.
This is all incredibly true because I just got out of one of these situations. Tony knows what he is talking about. As women we automatically think an older man is more mature based off of age which is NOT always the case! I’m 27, this grown boy is 36. There were so many red flags like him following and liking young college girls in early 20’s on Instagram. Then come to find out he had a secret tinder account where he was going to hook up with these girls! Ladies please be safe out there, stay prayed up, listen to your intuition, and keep getting new knowledge! Most importantly NEVER be afraid to walk away from someone who isn’t meant for your destiny! God will always replace with something better we just have to do the work and trust in him!
Amen on the last part. Please believe there are still men in their 30s with genuine intentions dating women in their 20s. I recently turned 35, have no kids, not married, and don't exclusively seek women younger than me; I'm open to a certain extent. My limits in age at this point are no older than three years and no younger than 23.
@@themechanic7732there’s an old saying in English: “youth is beautiful”, which usually explains why most, not all, men (and women) are more attracted to a younger opposite sex, vis a vis. Assuming we’re talking about heterosexual relationships.
"He's a pervert!" LOL, haha. Your delivery of that word was priceless. On a serious note, if all men are the same, or should I say, as you put it, fall into 2 basic categories, you have truly brought me clarity. I will " mentally" modify my thinking and understanding when it comes to relationships, to a point. You've provided nugget for me.
They want a NURSE. And someone to CONTROL. Even if he has money... Don't Do It Ladies. He's sweet for now. BUT, his ATTITUDE will soon change. RUN!!!🏃♀️ 🏃♀️ 🏃♀️
Yep this happen to my sister now she's had to start working part time to take care of her much older sickly husband their whole marriage has been an issue especially with his health problems. I knew he tricked her because he wanted a care taker not a wife
I've never been into older men. But I know so many women who date and marry only much older men. And some end up being a nursemaid. Because of health issues that occur.
Sisters, please listen to Mr.Gaskins. He’s telling the 💯 truth! Older men just want to control and manipulate younger women while having an other woman on the side and the audacity to think of themselves as a prize and a younger woman is just a housemaid and a cook.
I'm glad you put this video out. At my church there were men who were old enough to be my father that would flirt with me and try to talk to me. It was really disturbing.
Glad I watched this video, I’m 23 and this guy I work with is 36 I thought he was 27 but no.That’s a 13 year difference . The way he acts around me I can tell he been plotting, thankfully I dodged a bullet lol uncle Tony ain’t lying💯
I used to tell myself I want to be with an older man because I thought he'd be more mature (which I felt was true), but I wasn't being completely honest with myself because I may have turned away a mature guy closer to my age. Recently I discovered a man who is extremely mature and wise and his wife is actually five years older than him. They are happy and respect each other. So then I thought there may be something deeper than maturity for me wanting to be with an older guy. I realized there were fears that were influencing my attachment to be with an older man, and this video is confirming a lot of things I'm realizing lately. I am glad my mind has opened and I've opened my options to a man who is closer to my age. You're right women can think that a man closer to their age= less mature, but if he is mature, then what's the excuse? And if an age compatible and older man are both mature, the first case is actually better for a woman because with an older man there are higher chances of being widowed. So while women are going for an older man bc of the perceived pros, there are not that many benefits if you compare a mature young man vs. mature older man.
Sir Bless your heart, I concur with all you are saying I was in a 10 yr gap difference for 12 years yes from 20's to 30's and I outgrew him. When tried to leave he called me every name in the book and found every reason to dumb me down. Until I prayed for strength, left and Never returned. He still alone to this day. Loving self is the best and waiting on God
This is a very interesting perspective. My husband is older than me and I absolutely love it! Honestly, I was bored with men my own age and completely DONE with younger men. My husband and I have an amazing relationship, so I feel we are possibly the exception to the rule (my opinion) We have a very strong spiritual compatibility, which helps us a lot in our relationship. I'm grateful for us, and it sort of baffles my mind how blessed we have been.
May I gently ask why you watch Tony’s videos if you have such an amazing relationship? Please don’t be offended, just wondering☺️. Because I would not be here if I was happily married.
Thank you so much for this video Tony! I just turned 24 & I caught myself dating grown boys who are in their 30’s. I had this surfaced level mindset that guys older than me are more “mature.” Aaliyah said it best, “age ain’t nothing but a number.” The last grown boy I dealt with was mentally & emotionally immature. Lived with his cousin & his best friend at the age of 33. & even told me he’d be upset if I was sexually active with anybody bc I haven’t given myself up to him yet. The min he said that, I burned that bridge w him & ghosted him like I owed him $5. I met him off tinder too (deleted that app & any other dating app) I refuse to let anybody’s dusty ass son use & manipulate me bc they’re trying to fulfill sexual fantasies. Disgusting! I’m taking your advice Tony & cutting my age limit to 5 years. If you’re older than that, you’re a pervert. Yes, there are exceptions but honestly, that’s just rare at this point of life. Going to be patient & keep working on myself till God places the right MAN in my life! Thank you for all the advice Tony!
@Jackie Hellesoe This is scary familiar because you literally described my ex. He also lives with his cousin and best friend, and is now 34. I don’t like talking negatively on others but that was the most emotionally abusive relationship I’ve ever been in. Kudos to you for seeing red flags in that guy and cutting him off immediately
yeah and when you women get old yall secretly try and want to have sex with young attractive men. But then try to shame and call older men perverts for getting with young women. Hopefully God will never place a right man in your life.
This left me feeling so spiritually naked, exposed and vulnerable. You’ve told nothing but the truth. I’ve loved this horror story. Thank God I managed to get away childless, nursing ‘only’ my spiritual and mental wounds. I will NEVER shortchange myself like that again. I am destined to live a prosperous and comfortable life regardless. Mindset of scarcity be damned!
I dated an older man. He often mentioned wanting total submission. It was more than me listening to him, it was literally him wanting complete control over everything including how I decorated my home. He was rich, but my now husband who is only a year older is richer🤷🏽♀️ Don't get with an older man for security, because that security comes with a lot of BS. Find you someone worth way more than what they bring financially.
Sounds good. I like having no man (or woman). I know no body asked, just saying being able to absolutely do whatever you want at anytime is so much better than dealing with a relationship. Just not worth it to me.
yeah, i'm a divorced man, and will NEVER get married or do relationships again. relationships have TOO much compromise, and people are too quick to throw away a relationship instead of fight for it. i get all the play from women i want by working as a bouncer, and i'm good. my focus is on my only son and myself, and that's it!
Glad you made this video other videos promoting dating older men make it seem like you about find Denzel Washington. Like tony said you getting insecure and manipulative men. Especially if you haven’t focused on your brand and he hasn’t either. He won’t inspire you, he won’t motivate you , he will feel low cus you have dreams and will diminish them. He is going to slow you down it’s not worth it.
This is no lie, my ex looked for a younger women 18 years younger she was 20 he 38 and she was lost and confused, she’s close to our daughters age, bought her things, a nice arm trophy, today she’s 31 after he left her and training is over she can’t even move on properly. It’s perverted cause I know what he was doing why he choose her so young...
What’s y’all cap? I date 10 years older. I’ll admit, I started dating older men when I was young. Definitely had daddy issues. But Now I can’t date a man my age because I’m usually not interested after I realized he’s still building or wants kids etc. I have a strong personality, but I like the traditional way of the man leading and I don’t just date any kind of older guy.
Hmmm...Yeah, as long as they're not creepy and targeting you for misuse, you're fine, but at the root of it, it's for the same reasons...The difference is in how he treats you...
I'll say 13 is my cap. I've taken the time to know myself so I can definitely be honest with myself and say my attraction to older men is just my natural preference. If I see a man, he looks older, mature, and well put together then naturally I'll find myself attracted. I've met guys around my age who tried to manipulate and control and I've came across older men with that same behavior. On the other hand, I met older men who were genuine about dating and a relationship but after you get to know someone it's just small qualities you don't see yourself being around but not because he has a HUGE deal breaker.
Tony, you got my mom hollering, “Tell it Tony!!” in the background😂😂 Thank you for sharing your wisdom...this is definitely some of the same things my mom has been telling me over time.
I met one. But I stand my own ground. I spoke up for myself. Now he's gone for good. This event happened before I found the clip. To be honest, I never ever regreted what I said to him. Then I found your video is so accurated. Many ppl struggled including myself because of this specific type of man is mentally malnipulative by verbal abused and their stoic mindsets. They dont want to grow. Your video gave me a strong confirmation. Thank you so much.
Thank you for this. You are speaking the truth to me. This older man is pursuing me and it just feels "off" and listening to you, you validated why it is not setting well with me.
This is 100% true. Most of them also have a serious lust issue and want to be with younger women as s 3 x dolls or as TG would say c-buckets smh! I was approached by a man who 20+ year older than me, I did some research and found out his ex wife had their kids when she was 20 & 22yrs old... she’s 35!! He is 51. 🥴😱🤮
I was 18 when I had my first relationship with a guy a decade older than me. He didn't take 'no' for an answer and would get upset at me if I tried to refuse sex. I was naive in thinking that it's probs just me, but my god you're right. He was a pervert and extremely manipulative!! I can see that now.
I date older for maturity purposes. Between 2 to 7 years older. It’s just easier in my opinion because they have experience, maturity, and can advise on things. This is not the case all the time. But I have dated around my age. It comes with complications too.
I am in my forties and I had an 80 year old man approach me at the grocery store. He told me his age, told me he was actually married but he and his wife live in separate houses! He also wAs bold and stated he doesn’t need Viagra! I busted out laughing! He was trying to give me his number. Ill never forget that. 😂✌🏽
@@alicehardy8040 he was all dressed up wearing colonge, and I thought to myself, does he come to the store regularly to hunt down women on a regular basis. Creepy!
Wow, I didn't know I needed to hear this until you said it. I trust your insight! When I think about it, a man must be insecure if he is choosing someone younger.
He’s is 1000 correct! On so many points! The guy I’m dating now said he dates younger women because he think he’s immature, we’re 9 years apart. I would leave but I’m too far deeply I love with him. I know it’s dangerous but he treats me so well and he’s so smart he had a terrible past and so did I we don’t reflect that on each other but I don’t know . Everyone has problems and issues , he never mistreated me or makes me feel inadequate, we listen to each other …it’s been a year now idk know y’all.
i have never ever ever been attracted to a man older than 2-4 years older than me its actually a turn off and reminds me of being with a father figure.... i prefer my age or a year or two younger.... my husband is my age and i think thats a good thing...lol
Age does not guarantee maturity experience does . referring to men on average and knowing they take a long time to mature . concerning a woman it's takes time for a woman to learn her value to learn her worth and once she does she will not tolerate grown boy tactics it's not enough to sustain her she will get to were she will grow out of that right away once it's shown to her . nothing against younger women but it takes pain and loss and maturity to learn your value until then a grown boy will have a field day with your lack of mental development . But once you do come into learning your worth you will not tolerate a man's nonsense you will be able to decipher a mature man from a boy in a man's body . Thank you for your honesty in this video .
Tony i really appreciate what you are doing!! I was married to a guy 12 older than me. That wasn’t enough I dated a man 21 years my senior, I’m 39 and he just turn 60. In the beginning I really thought it was organic because you always came to my place of business. I really thought we had a connection, we started dating in October 2017 and I broke up with him October 2020. He abused me physically, mentally, verbally, emotionally, and finically. He is very insecure too. I have always been more mature for my age however, I’m not dating anyone who is not within an appropriate age range. Again thank you for what you are doing
Had the same experience and he is now still looking for younger women ...can't be happy with an attractive intelligent women who brings something to the table . The man I dated ..was accusing , abusive and very immature and not very intelligent or interesting. He needed a younger woman because I truly believe deep down he never grew up. Old and searching women out due to his sick thoughts and ideas. I pulled his card and sent him packing . Just disgusting. Thanks for your input. I also think they are so insecure they are needing validation.
@@tinaryan7059 you are absolutely right! My ex was dating a young girl whom could have been his granddaughter he was 61 and she 20. He was very immature, controlling, and perverted! I’m so thankful I broke up with him. However, the flesh gets weak but I have to remind myself I’m more worthy and don’t deserve him, I deserve much better
@@kimberlydwilson6544 sister I am praying for us both . Broke it off with mine after finding him looking up how to get young women to talk to him on UA-cam matter of fact. It's a little lonely . Figured I would throw myself into work . Just tired in my soul. Feel free to message me on here if it will let you . I always try to help like friends. We are woth diamond's and more rare than any precious stone according to God. Some people will never be just thankful. I want to marry my best friend next time. Here's to a good prayer and alot of faith !🙏
The majority of the older men that I know and am related to and associate with are ALL multimillionaires (MAJORITY!) Most are happily married and accomplished …which is how we know each other. But at 65 I can still tap out the majority of untrained men …regardless of age or size and many trained men who are “young.” I don’t know what delusional world YOU live in but their is absolutely NOTHING to “compete” for or about. But, in general, there is NO “competition!” Even if we’re talking exclusively about “younger men with money!” You see, one thing that both Warren Buffet and I learned long ago is that once you reach a certain level …money is no longer an issue and there truly is not a vast amount of disparity in what you’re able to have or what you’re able to do. In other words if I were to become a multiBILLIONAIRE and upgraded from being s multiMILLIONAIRE …what would change? …Absolutely *_NOTHING!_* My lifestyle would be EXACTLY as it is now. There is NOTHING that I need that I don’t already have. It would just be more money to give away. I would still be equally as frugal and down to earth as I am now. And my wife is the same way. Neither of us is easily impressed with material. In fact SEVERAL of the wealthy older men I know have dramatically DOWNSIZED their lifestyle and the size of their homes in order to live a simpler life. I know of NO “younger men with money” that ANY older man (who is a REAL man with money) could possibly “envy!” I find that those who floss the least often have the MOST and especially with young men …who so often are INSECURE and feel a need to prove something; with them, those who floss the most and are the most materialistic often have the LEAST! You are not even in the same LEAGUE so therefore YOU are not even in a position to “compete” because you are NOT even allowed to sit at the table if all you have is being a (snicker) “young man with money.” Lions don’t care about the opinions of antelopes.
I love them too. I feel attracted for them and I love the power they make you feel because your presence is delightful in his eyes. Right now I'm dating a man on his 40s but our relationship is transactional, so It's not that bad. I really like this guy but I'm aware of how manipulative he can be, so that's what I'm watching these videos
@@sewblue187 dont worry, i guess some people is more serious and some just want to live the moment. Yes you're right, it would be complicated for an old man TO take seriously a young woman. I had a cold shower of reality this weekend
My my my Mr Gaskins you are hitting the nail on the head i dated a guy who was 22 years older than me and u are truly helping me to understand the reason behind this man totally disrespecting me he doesn’t value my opinion at all as a matter of fact he doesn’t even want to hear my opinion he has told me why don’t you just shut up. It truly hurts to know that I actually loved him and thought he loved me but after listening to Mr Gaskins i am sure that love has nothing to do with his intentions but he will not be able to use me anymore cause i am out
I have experiences exactly what you are saying oh my goodness what you saying makes everything make sense that i went through while dating him i ended up leaving it wasn’t for me
It might have something to do with notches in the belt. He said that grown boys are obsessed with notches and want to taste every flavor of the rainbow: black, white, old, young, blonde, brunette, mixed, asian etc.
OMG!!! You are describing my was-band of 20 years. Lord, I am so glad another man is speaking out about it. He was the type that believed that only other MEN outside the household was able to chime in about issues WITHIN our household. Tony is speaking the ABSOLUTE TRUTH...the kicker is that I met him at church! BEWARE BEWARE BEWARE
“If you are looking for an older man, I am here to tell you, he is looking for you, but he is looking for you for the wrong reasons.” TG
True.
Exactly
💯💯
Only blk women would agree smh....
Modern black women are out of touch with what a older man want....
I was talking to a man 15 years older than me, and he was the worst. He was very mean, controlling, and manipulative. 🤦🏾♀️
Ex-husband was only 6.5 yrs older...same track different cho-choo!
@@concernedcitizen8448 good one
I want marry a older guy like 30 year's old and only 23 year's old
I’m a bit older and I thought I could date older men because I’m older too well the same thing happened down right abusive 56 I was so disappointed I stop dating over a year working on myself
Sis>>I feel your pain! I'm STILL Healing & Undoing the Programming/Conditioning from the Trauma of being with a "grown-boy" who was 14 years older than Me...LESSON LEARNED
Most older men trying to live through these youngster women. They've lived there lives already. If u asked me, most of them going through midlife crisis and don't want to accept that they getting older.
That's true. I've met older men with children trying to date me and IL be thinking like you want me to be a stepmom. They think it's normal. They had their time and need to look for someone in a similar situation
C S don't you feel disgusted by him? Honest question no offense
You are correct. The old man I married did this to me. That was a horrifying experience. I'd not EVER encourage a young woman under 30 to marry an old man. The imbalances between them are just too great.
I was 23 when I married that guy, and we had a child. My pregnancy was high risk, so age makes no difference in that aspect either.
@@CS-pl1re lol sugardaddy
The same men saying to women “clock is ticking”
He said if you want emotional security “Go to Jesus”... you want financial security “Get on ya grind” 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
that's a word!!!!
If you want emotional security you need to figure out why you do the things you do & to face your past trauma.
Audrey D but I think we all want emotional security in a relationship. that’s the entire point of a relationship.
Right that’s why Iam working on my finances at 30.. these men 10-15 yrs older doing worst than me at times… I will secure my own bag 💰💰💰
I agree
They prefer very young & naive for their own exploits. So, be careful out here.
They think we hating when we tell them
@@riorio-rt1oq Sadly, yes.
Yup to train them how they want and they don’t want the woman to have their own minds easier to manipulate them!!!
So true
@@riorio-rt1oq that's part of the reason. But the truth is men are not as mature as women so when we get with a chick our age or older, we try our best to keep them and spend our time tryna fulfill the expectations and have to protect you and pay for everything while if I'm with a younger chick, she is emotionally gonna chase me because I'm more mature than men her age. So I can spend my time on my goals n other shit without worrying what I should do 24/7 to please her so she wont leave me for a better man.
As a woman in her 20’s. Ive realised that they tend to gravitate towards us only sexually. Otherwise every woman will be snapped up by 25 but it’s rarely the case. I’ve dated older men and I realise that their ex wives are much older and the ones who recently married. Married women 28+. So I’m not sure. 🤷🏽♀️ I’m starting to think this is a myth. I looked at studies and women in the west aren’t married until 28-35+ on average. So when we say prefer young, in what way? Because it is very important to know. Being viewed as desirable for only sexual activities isn’t a compliment to me.
They are predators. Older men like that purposely go for someone younger bc they can control them financially and emotionally. Women their own age can see through the bs and don’t want to be with a manchild
@@amarjotsingh8455 The gag is, those types of men do not tend to have a lot of money? I guess it’s about who the little money that they have can spread the furthest with?
@@ninapeterson275 Yea But still the average 35 year old man is still more established than a 22 year old women who just got out of college and is figuring out her life. The older man in the situation (on average) still has some sort of house, cars, savings etc and a lot of times older men sabotage younger women careers bc they are jealous of a woman bettering herself to where eventually she can make more etc. overall they are predators
It's not a compliment...It's disgusting...I have nieces your age and I would be horrified if they showed up with a man my age...Men use younger women as symbols of their dying youth...I avoided older men in my twenties because they behaved all creepy and predatory...Gross...
I was 19 my son sperm donor was 44 in 2010 when i met him. That’s a 24 year difference.
Getting old is inevitable; Maturation is a choice. Apostle Paul said when I was a child I thought as a child, spoke as a child, understood as a child but when I became a man I put away childish things.
Amen!
yay stacie love it
That is so true but some men remain as children because of their upbringing. There’s a man who is in his sixties but has the mentality of a twelve year old boy.
Amen Sister 💐
Good example
AGE doesn't equate to WISDOM. Only true character matters within a reasonable age range, when choosing a man.
🤙🏽🤙🏽
Say that shit again for the people in the back !!!!
I always prayed for this .
Amen I say this exact thing to everybody that thinks age determines maturity and wisdom
True WISDOM come from GOD.
“Somebody who is operating purely is not looking for somebody from a whole another generation.” 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾. Yes, indeed, Tony.
My daughter is 22 years old and gets hit on/ogled all of the time by men in their 30s, 40s, etc. She thinks it’s gross. Good!
It's pedophilia. So glad she knows how to avoid perverts.
@@d_roi8689 don't be disingenuous. 22 is not a child.
It's not pedophilia. But she is young for those dudes. Although she is not a child but not a woman
It started for me when I was 17 or 18. One man looked like he was in his 80s. It's still happening and I am 29. I need to be more aggressive because it is downright disrespectful and predatory.
@@Yahkeam Compared to guys in their 30s and beyond, 22 is a child. There has to be something perverted about a man looking for intimacy with a woman young enough to be his daughter.
Because often times when women are very young we're still finding ourselves in many ways. Which older men love to exploit...
I had a friend 46 telling me he can’t stand women his age because they’re angry unhappy etc married a women 27 and now his wife and him have these fights where he had the nerve to try to use me to cover something up and I didn’t allow it and lost a lot of respect for him
Your are right about that sis💜
Will keep your pants up that's probably the only thing he wants anyway as long as you keep your panties on when you can explore everything.
@@MrMannface then don’t complain when you can’t get laid.
Bingo
“He is a pervert” 😂😂😂the way you delivered that . HILLARIOUS!
And yes! …You hit on the the nail. We think that older men are wise, secure , powerful and that they will provide some sort of safety.
The safety that most likely we didn’t received from a fatherless childhood . A bit late but i learnt my lesson. Now I want to work on myself and hopefully God will place the right man in my life when and if the time is right !
Correct
I was 18 dating a 36 year old man. I dated him for year and half and I remember having self doubt about everything I did. When I called it off he kept coming back. I didn’t know it was a soul tie until later on. When I turned 20 I started dating a 46 year old man. He approached me and convinced me he was different. Coming to find out he was married and was having sex with his wife, his baby mama as well as me. I learned my lesson with both men. Both men gaslight me, manipulated money from me, used me and hurt me emotionally and verbally.
I'm so sorry you went through this sis
@@vh7637 it’s ok, I’m in therapy now and I’ve made a vow to remain abstinence until marriage. ❤️
UA-cam Sheraseven1...hope your okay
I feel you HARD on this Sis-keep healing and growing. Sending you love and support.
@@happylindsay4475 thank you 🙏🏽 ❤️
Young ladies you better leave those old men alone. They're old and sick looking for a Nurse. Don't get stuck having to take care of one.
Depends on the type of men...
Or being a widow before the age of 45.
Some of these older women are too bitter and have lost the capacity to love unconditionally and let go. I'm unhappy with that, that's why I have been dating a younger woman for the last two years. Marriage next on the agenda.. Personality and maturity says a lot....
If a young man has health issues that are hereditary or something from a freak accident, you’ll still be a caregiver😂
I was dating someone 17 years older than I was. Conclusion. I had daddy issues and I was inspired my his finances, after doing some growing and healing, I came to find out , that he was a lost soul and was broken from his divorce and couldn’t take the fact that he didn’t have his children 24/7 anymore. The best you could do for yourself is to keep working on you.
Same.. 18 yrs older & same shit:/
I’m 19 and I have had men in their 30’s-40’s every week contacting me trying to pay me for pictures. I go on their FB pages and they have wives and kids! I block them immediately, but it’s just sad that you would feel attracted to someone who is in the same grade as one of your children! Disgusting! Young women get a man who is close in age with you.
You and your partner should grow together.
@@popa213 A 5 year or less age difference is decent, but larger than that is not good. Tony is telling the truth.
It really is disgusting
You still can grow despite the age
@@LA-wv7gf Same Way They Got My Ex-Fiance 😔 Good Bless You Mama My Ex Mother In Law.... Told Me She's A Woman Now & Can Have Sex With Whoever She Wants Now "Legally" Because We're 19 I'm So Hurt
Well said. My husband is sleeping with a young woman the same age as his daughters…he’s 34 years older than her. It’s sick and it’s destroyed everything they’ve ever known about their father.
Tony, not lying I divorced my older husband almost a year ago he was running circles around me .. I was young & dumb &couldn’t see through muddy water!
Good for you!!👑
You do understand that the older a man gets the more developed his brain is right? Even if you dated a guy your age that doesn't mean when he's older he'll be the same as he was. Maybe women should stop choosing the wrong men instead of bringing an entire age group down.
Same met him at 21 he was 28 I'm 27 and just left just wasted my time but I learned to love myself
@@ryanj357 that's what I'm saying you can't let one man speak for his whole generation
@@onesolejeanius3498 It's ridiculous when these women give the "Young and dumb excuse" if he was such a bad guy then why did they choose to stay with him? And you're both adults. There's no excuses. Men are the natural leaders in a relationship. It's natural that a younger woman would want an older man. Can't believe she divorced him just because of his age.
I tell men all the time. I don’t need a daddy. I have one.
Exactly.
and a granpa too
@@queens3696 🤣🤣🤣
This is true! My ex-husband was 11 years older than I. His first wife was only four years younger than him and he would comment that he had to teach her to do everything! I was naive but had spiritual grandparents. As I matured in the LORD I saw clearly how stagnant he remained. They are abusive, mean, condescending, controlling, and worse. It won’t last because if it is not Godly, it won’t grow!!! I could write a book and one of my goals (after 20 years, with only my children to show as blessings) is to warn women that you don’t want that energy!!! Don’t procrastinate and become spiritually famished!!! You can never get time back!!!
omg can u please explain more🥺
@@nh003 I blew many years of my life on older men and they were all toxic and manipulative and narcissistic, never again.
Ladies, also keep in mind a lot of these older men have estranged wives that they forget to mention.
Facts
I think that in today's society two people should have to qualify before getting married. It is terrible how fast and easy so many get married. I come across married women often and I can tell good and well when they are hunting for someone on the side.
@@14kurtismiller Some married people are worse then single people because married people are the biggest flirts.
Preach it sister
Sure do cause who's going to take care of him when his old azz have a heart attack???
No lies been told!!! I knew a guy he was 56 y/o, he was into me and I am 28 y/o. He told me he only dates females between 23-27 y/o...😩😩😩 I call that a pervert 😒🤦🏽♀️.
Its an ego thing they are getting older and unattractive and having a woman half their age who is more attractive than they are is a self esteem boost. Plus they cannot keep women their own age they won't put up with their grown boy behavior, wandering eye, etc.
So true so true
TRUE💯
Facts
*In a nutshell.* 💯
Exactly👏👏👏
I like older men but all that you are saying is true. But I have always stood on my own two feet and never back down from my beliefs. They always stop dealing with me bc I’m too independent and I talk back a lot 🤣
That's what you think
Hey Sis same same
Lol
Talk back a lot 🤣 me two!
Same
Honestly it's disgusting when I see an old man trying to make his move and in my mind I'm thinking, "Lord Jesus this person is older than my dad not to mention my grandfather," it's disgusting on so many levels and to think they don't see anything wrong with it is disturbing. Had this one grinning all the time on my way to work even offered to give me his numbers and would basically harass me for my numbers everyday then one day I snapped when I realised he thought I was playing when I refused to give out my numbers when I tell you he got in line chile - disgusting.
It really is disgusting...creepy as heck🤢...I don't have to worry about it now, though because I'm "too old" for older men...😅bvs... *shivering*...
@Wise4Sure 😅😅😅😅😅😅....Idk...Maybe I just don't pay attention to they creepy selves!😅😅😅...Even at at 40, I still would feel creeped out if a 60 year old tried to flirt!
an 80 yr old in my neighborhood creeped on me for 3 yrs since i moved here. nobody would believe how perverted and controlling he was to me. he made friends with everyone in the neighborhood while tormenting me. hed take me out to eat and convince me he was my only real friend and told me hed nibble my ear rub my feet and if he was 50yrs younger hed marry me. one time he made me get in his car when i was at the beach, go to a restaurant and told me he was falling in love with me. now i cant walk down the street cause i dont want to be harassed or obsessed over by him
- to easily manipulate them.
- because they’re less likely to care if you have your shit together.
@@scaldon2 men risk it too. Older male sperm has been linked to Down syndrome. It’s not just the woman’s fault. It’s take two to tango
@@scaldon2 Then maybe start making women under 25 wives? It’s rarely happening enough according to studies. Then you blame women for it. Do you have a young wife or kids yourself?
@@amarjotsingh8455 Correct. In fact. Many sperm banks do not accept applications from men over 35.
@@scaldon2 your obsession with women’s bodies is gross and no woman wants a baby with a 60 year old man 🤢🤢
@@scaldon2 Lol it does not matter what men can have. It’s women who choose who procreates not men. And no one is choosing an old man unless he is super rich. Also, women push out the babies. Pregnancy is difficult. What 60 year old woman wants a baby at 60? Even if it could happen most wouldn’t want to 😂😂😂
You telling the truth Tony. Don't play yourself into believing that the older man has more to offer because you will be surprised down the road. In most cases they have motives which extend long-term like someone to care for them later in life while you're left feeling burdened and resentful because you are still able to "Dip It and Do It" When you are younger it seems cute. But wait until you get older but his older is way older than yours and things start getting outta balance. Also it is true, older men cheat on younger women too. So don't get it twisted. When he's strictly looking for much younger, it's not a compliment like you're winning. Remember, "Time Is Undefeated" 💯
From experience you’re 100% correct
Wow I just said this!!! I met a guy recently he looked about 45… I figured so. But he told me he’s 39. He later revealed that he lied because he thought I wouldn’t talk to him. Lol my ex is 44… that didn’t go so well because he didn’t have it all together either. Older don’t mean wiser.
Most of them are broke and broken. They made terrible financial choices in their lifetime. Then they would deceive you into thinking that the county’s financial situation is in decline and they are the only ones with financial security in town. They’d blame it on Trudeau and would coded-ly ask if you were sexually pure and would stare down at that cute young blonde I was staring at. He claimed to be 71 but he looked like a walking corpse. I’m only 18 by the way and that shit about women leaving their prime even at 22 😂 will only leave them in the hands of deranged men. But if I were honest, it’s not about age, some young men are just as bad and show the signs that when they get older, they’d be chasing younger women like our living forefathers are doing. Women should stay away from these type of men. We should go for men that like us for who we are not just our youth. I’m not promoting late marriage, but don’t let these immature 30 year olds or living corpses deceive you.
🙏 thank you, thank you, thank you for explaining this with such clarity. I am 12 years younger than my husband and as I matured during our 12 year relationship and broke from his control, he found a girl 22 years his junior to cheat with. I found her and we talked and we both realized she was just as naive as I was when he found me. We supported each other and let the world know who he truly was. Now I’m looking after me and I have a new friend too. Women, stop attacking other women, your man is the problem!
I agree with you to an extent, because every man has his own agenda when it comes to seeking women. What caught my attention in your post is the mentioning of the 12-year age difference between you and your ex. I recently turned 35 and a 23 year old woman is the youngest I'd go when it comes to dating. I'm also open to dating older women, but they can't be more than three years older than me at this point. Keep in mind I am not married and don't have kids.
Yep a pedo will always be a pedo.
Please leave him. All of you. I wasted age 18-23 with a grown boy 11 years older than me. Any accomplishment you make, he will be resentful. He kept trying to trap me with a kid. Over 5 years, he went from a "good man" to verbal abuu, emotional abuu, then eventually physical abuu. Leave b4 it's too late. You are the prize. Watch all Tony's video and read the books. I wish i had this knowledge at that age. I would not have stayed past a year.
This is my life ... mine is 12 years older and resentful of every success I’ve had. Sadly, I have children with him.
@@beibei7176 your children need to see self love in a happy, healthy and whole mom. Wishing you and your family the best
True
Rule number 1 don’t rub your accomplishments in a man’s face. You are emasculating him by doing so and naturally he will be resentful. Let the man provide and lead and just relax into your femininity.
@@ritaaleksandrovna4518 correct!
You ain't lying. I learned the hard way
Love how Tony feels no way to bring out the dictionary 😩😂love his no filtered, no shame attitude.
Facts
What A Word!!! Deliverance in 30 minutes!! That's all I dated were older men, because my Dad was much older than my Mom and he took care of his family. But as I look back, both parents went through heart ache and their marriage failed after 32 years of marriage. My relationships failed of dating older men. I did not need a Daddy, I had a good father. I needed a good man!!! Tony, keep being used of God!!
me too i think i try to get with older men who remind me of my dad but my dad was always there. but the older men ive been with always proved to be immature
Once I dated a man that was ten years older than me. He would speak down on me. Telling me I didn’t know any better, he’s been there done that, etc. Never again! I want to grow with someone not a surrogate father.
Been through this too
But that's the cons of dating a man who is older .That's why a lot of men like dating younger women ...with older women there's nothing new with them.
Okay! Say it again
I think it’s a control thing
It depends on the individual. A grown boy and a mature man differs. Yet, one can’t say that it is solemnly due to “control”. However, the reality is that it doesn’t apply to all.
@Chan Britt she’s one of those “fashionista” types that tony is talking about so I wouldn’t take her too seriously. Just bc a man is older with some money it doesn’t mean they are high value
@Chan Britt In my culture, it is common for Congolese and Angolan women tend to marry older men hence. It’s about the individual, as Tony Gaskin said : there is a difference between a grown boy and a man.
@@amarjotsingh8455 Ah beg you pardon? I think we are all entitled to share our opinions. And even if, we agree or disagree, let us respect each other. There’s no need to categories or insult a person you do not know. Have a blessed evening.
Chan Britt in 99% its for a bad reason (mentally/emotionally etc abusive narc. guys w little to no morals and just disgusting)
When my husband met me I was later 20's he was 36, I was far ahead with maturity , education and life goals . But this man was far ahead of me with Emotional and mental Manipulation till this day. I didnt see it coming each and every time he pulled his slick moves, then hide hands. Listen to Tony ladies...
You ain’t lying the narc I was with is now with a 21 yr old girl and he’s 38.... 17 yrs difference.....I looked at him and started laughing when I found out her age he was furious with me bc he wanted me to feel jealous.... Not jealous of a child potna bye 🐦 🧠
Thats just nasty. Someone go save that child. She looking for her daddy
@@joannasmith2670 He have her right where he wants her, she has family and older sisters they can tell her better but he prolly manipulated them too... I’m sure she is a hot in the ass girl bc real mothers would’ve been caught on to protect their kids from ppl like this
@@LA-wv7gf No there is 17 yrs age difference between him and her.... I was just stating that his son is 17 and how would his son look at his dad talking to a girl 21yrs old
Facts!!! Laugh at him. Go level up with a better MAN 💋
@@annadenise8902 Thanks 💃🏾
They can’t impress or do enough for women their age so they seek younger women or he’s still in the party stage(even though he’s older) and he doesn’t take life or relationships seriously. He can be behind in life
Well said😁🥰
(SIGH) 🙄 So then according to YOU …older men actually PREFER old women …but since he can’t “impress” his “preference” he (SIGH) reluctantly just acquiesces and SETTLES for a younger; hotter; purer; more feminine; less run-through; less jaded; less experienced; more fertile YOUNGER woman? 🤔
Oh those poor sad men ☹️ who have to SETTLE for young women after they get “rejected? …by the OLD post-wall women. Must SUCK! 😢
Most of them want to groom young girls. When your young your less focus on commitment and your naive. Your more impressionable and easy to manipulate!! When I was 20 I was with a 37 year old man and got pregnant. Lawwwwd if I could go back and change it I wouldn’t cuz I have my daughter and she perfect but I wish I would of did things differently. And also men who date younger, really can’t find women there age who would even find them attractive/ will put with there childish ways.
Groom? Not even! At that age it’s all about his needs and wants.. Most mature women ain’t having the bs no matter what he looks like
This is truth. I was 19 dude was 44 and i have a son with him that he doesn’t take care of. I can’t change it however, i am getting closer and breaking chains by now every thing is making sense on why it occurred.
@@blackbeauty2781 I said what i said! & Yes, GROOM!! Obviously you need to further look up the definition of what groom means. When your young and especially a slow bloomer/ don’t really know how to date maybe because you weren’t allowed to under your parents roof and when your finally out on your own; no longer under your parents roof/protection.......your left to the wolves. Men can sense that and use that to there advantage. A man can make the young girl into who what he THINKS is a good woman and break her down till she’s weak/insecure and depends on him for approval because he’s “trained” her to be like that cuz she knows no better. Grooming means, “a form of abuse that involves manipulating someone until they're isolated, dependent, and more vulnerable to exploitation.“ or to “guide / making them into something”. Grooming has MANY different meanings, it just depends how you use it. For example Politicians, superstars, actors, business men/women, ect are all groomed to a certain image/role of something. Children are groomed by there parents. Your guiding that person to be someone you think they should be. It could be good or bad. & for a women to be attracted to man doesn’t necessarily mean only looks lol. That’s high school/grown girl thinking. To be attracted to someone takes a collective of things. There (personality, looks can be one, the way they think, there goals and ambitions. Ect.) Being attracted to someone is FAR from looks.
@@ElauntraSeoul .. How’d you get that response from my comment 🤷🏽♀️ and you also changed your wording and your immediate statement wasn’t that long lol 😒! My comment is not for the faint at heart or sensitivie individuals! And like I said, grown men are not in it to groom you.. Your life’s story wasn’t necessary hun
@@blackbeauty2781 yes I agree..I chase a 50 years man and im 37..but wanted marriage..he ghosted me..for a 25 I think that he moved in with and not married..when I was 20 I was mature and got ghosted a lot..long story short I have almost single forever..
He's looking for you for the wrong reasons just as you're looking for him for the wrong reasons.That gave me meaning
Makes a lot of sense. Once that young woman matures in the BRAIN and leaves him...he’ll trade her in for a younger model who he can manipulate. & the cycle continues. 😂 It’s hilarious
@Toni Denise what is you’re Instagram so we can DM I want too know you’re life story you seem like you sure have great stories too tell
Come onnn!!!! "If you want financial security... get on your grind; And while you're on your grind and you're in the fields working, like Ruth, you're gonna meet your Boaz!" A word 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
I’m 30 and get hit on by older men all the time. I look a lot younger than I am and sometimes they look shocked (and slightly disappointed) when they find out my age. I was once turned on by this, but now that I’m a grown woman, I find it to be quite disgusting. Despicable.
Same 😂
That's just reality. You can be all hurt by this but women do the same when they are disappointed by the men they're interested in's lack of means.
@@theplasmacollider6431 literally made no sense
I know a man in his early sixties that go after women in their twenties or early thirties!🤮 He said he does not want an old woman🥴. But he old though! He has daughters older than that!🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️. So wrong.
He's on the blue pill...they turn out to be pathetic old men with health issues.
He probably got the worms. 😆
@@evolvinglove7786 lol
Don't judge all older men some are looking for something serious some men close to my age range act the same i don't find it wrong to like older men and want to get with em if they is want u like is more to a person than Just thier age
Me too...
Love how he said “he’s a pervert” and it went straight to commercial😂😂😂
Amen . Man strength is in his gentleness. My husband was 12 years older than me. There was no baby/daddy mess between us. We respected each other. Being a survivor of the Vietnam War he was humble, sensitive, loving and patient. But don’t disrespect him or anyone is loved. And the people that new him knew not to cross him. I was very independent but he was sensitive to my needs and I was sensitive to his. And when his health started to deteriorate, I was there. Unfortunately, we both got Covid-19. He died in the hospital. I recovered at home. So my husband being 12 years older was good for me and a blessing. He died 7/31/20 at 76 the week of both our birthdays . July 27 and 28. I turned 64.
So sorry for your loss🙏
So very sorry for your loss. 🙏🏿
🌹🙏🏾🌹🙏🏾🌹
Sorry for tour loss, thanks for sharing your beautiful story ⚘
💐💐💐
You have effectively described every man I've ever been seriously involved with. Every. Single. One.
Insecure, immature, controlling, silly, old men.
Gee, I wish I'd known about you years ago before I met these defective men.
Thank you, Tony.
Lord have mercy. Thank you.
Heavy on the “lord have mercy” in my case.
no offense, but what does it say about you if you're attracting these type of men?!
black parenting can be VERY TOXIC and leads to damaged kids who then become damaged adults.
maybe you have to heal yourself until you truly love yourself, and will then begin projecting the energy that won't attract dusties.
OR, maybe i'm just misassuming, and there's nothing wrong with you, and you just had a string of bad luck regarding dating.
either way, hope you find the person you want in the future.
@@yesihavealastname1562 Agreed
@@yesihavealastname1562 No lies detected. If every man you were with was like that, maybe it's time to take a look in the mirror. I'm just saying.
@@yesihavealastname1562I think the creator of this content is also majorly projecting but it’s also apparent that he’s preaching to the choir.
I was 21 dating a 56 year old man. Looking back on it i feel disgusted and repulsed but I honestly did not know any better and wish I could’ve loved myself and realized what I was doing. He was lacking control in his own life and that’s why he was attracted to me, because he knew he could control me. I thought he was different and an exception to the rule, but I found out the hard way that was not true. He exclusively dated girls 18-25 while being a literal old man. He was older than my dad but he gave me attention and told me things that made me feel like I mattered to someone meanwhile I was not even taking care of myself and doing the inner work and therapy I always needed. I now focus on working and getting my bag right, and spending time focusing on myself learning how to love myself first. No man could ever validate me anymore because I do that for myself. Anything an older man likes to promise he can give you are all things you can give to yourself if you do the work and love yourself first . Thank you for the video ❤️
@@RavenMarie2001 you learned. Choose your own age but choose right. There are many young men who'll end up like that53yr old you dated.
I became a woman when I discovered where my strengths laid and it didn’t lay in me being tough but it laid in me being vulnerable. It was weird at first and I tried hard to fight it because I’ve always been a tough chick but eventually I accepted this is what being a woman is all about and let me tell you now that I felt the freedom of vulnerability and sensitivity of a woman I don’t give a damn what anyone say about me and I don’t need to be tough, right, perfect because there’s nothing more freeing than knowing as a woman you can cry, fuck up, be wrong, and get broken and still be a beautiful, gentle, loving woman and nothing and nobody can stop it, now that’s strength 🙄 I will die a single black proud mother before I ever let another grown ass boy disrespect me, because nigga, I’m worth it and I deserve to be loved correctly!🖕🏾
Beautiful one question are you married ir are you engaged
Amen
I felt this shit in my spirit ❤️❤️❤️
These men are not cultivated to know how to love women. Look at the community of men today. This is why so many women are building security on their own. We've all had enough with these man-child behaviors.
There's nothing wrong as a woman being feminine. This whole feminist agenda to make women men has warped women. Good for you. However, a bit of constructive criticism for you. Please don't use the kind of profanity you have in you're post. It's better to exercise more self control in how you speak and conduct yourself and will make you a better woman. Anyway, good luck to you in your growth.
The bible says growing old doesn't guarantee good sense 💯💪👌
😅😆😆🤣
Preach, I agree. Cause what matters is what a person brings to the table in a relationship. Age is number like quantity but quality takes it further.
@@alwaysjolly1096 💯
Babe I’m about to get in the word !
I felt that Tony..."Be on ur grind in the field like Ruth, and you'll find ur Boaz"
I see it as insulting. Several men in range from 50s-70s have been interested and wondering why in their mind they would think a woman in her 30s would be interested in them.
This is so true. I’m 22 but I always attracted older men. I think it’s because we give them more excitement and stroke their ego.
Excitement to use you because they think you’re gullible and easier to be lie to
@@jordyaaaa2990 lies men prefer younger woman because they tend to be hotter and have less baggage and are less stressful.
@@themechanic7732 Nice to know you’re watching, hopefully you’re learning from Tony’s videos .
@@themechanic7732 lies! It is for sexual and perverted reasons has absolutely nothing to do with baggage. 🤢🤢bunch of disgusting predators
@@nemoxx96xx58 lies younger woman are better in every aspect compared to a older woman they have way less baggage , they tend to be hotter and happier than older females.
I get approached by older men most of the time and since watching you I tell them they are too old for me. Most get offended or try to talk me out of it. And the 2 times where I went against the rule I realized I should have stuck with my first mind. No men more than 5 years older. No exceptions.
Older men have been approaching me since I was at least 18. I was never attracted to them. Last year, I tried giving one a chance. He was 15 years older. After a week, I just couldn’t do it anymore. The age difference caused me too much anxiety. The next time an older man approached me, I was honest with him when he kept being pushy. I told him, I’ve tried being with an older man, it wasn’t for me. I have heard Tony’s video, but I am open to 10 years at the most.
@@nessparadis6948 I definitely have learned this one for myself as well. One of the guys even tried to convince me that I'm not going to find a mature guy at my age 🤣 turns out he was just as immature as a guy my age & was actually married to make matters worse & lying about his age. I found all of this out within the first 3 days doing a little digging.
As a younger woman I’m sick of being hit on by old ass men. They even proposition with money. And I know too many other young women who use these guys while dating a guy their own age at the same time. Why don’t we stick to 5 years older/younger max? Because I don’t want an old guy but some really try to sell themselves with money. It’s not a real relationship. I think the 5 year older/younger rule is good
I am 20 and I only date men close to my age cause I find them more attractive and Most older men that find women in their early 20’s attractive tend to only obsesses over these girls no matter how old they are themselves, so even if he’s 20 years older than you, there will be a day when you won’t be young enough for his tastes.
True
The ACCURACY and the perfect way you put this!!! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
This is all incredibly true because I just got out of one of these situations. Tony knows what he is talking about. As women we automatically think an older man is more mature based off of age which is NOT always the case! I’m 27, this grown boy is 36. There were so many red flags like him following and liking young college girls in early 20’s on Instagram. Then come to find out he had a secret tinder account where he was going to hook up with these girls! Ladies please be safe out there, stay prayed up, listen to your intuition, and keep getting new knowledge! Most importantly NEVER be afraid to walk away from someone who isn’t meant for your destiny! God will always replace with something better we just have to do the work and trust in him!
Ew did we date the same man-child?? 🤮🤮🤮
Lol all me n of any age do the same thing and all men love young woman all men of any age love young woman it is what it is...
Amen on the last part. Please believe there are still men in their 30s with genuine intentions dating women in their 20s. I recently turned 35, have no kids, not married, and don't exclusively seek women younger than me; I'm open to a certain extent. My limits in age at this point are no older than three years and no younger than 23.
@@themechanic7732there’s an old saying in English: “youth is beautiful”, which usually explains why most, not all, men (and women) are more attracted to a younger opposite sex, vis a vis. Assuming we’re talking about heterosexual relationships.
This is great! "HE'S A PERVERT"
Period!
Pretty much
"He's a pervert!" LOL, haha. Your delivery of that word was priceless.
On a serious note, if all men are the same, or should I say, as you put it, fall into 2 basic categories, you have truly brought me clarity. I will " mentally" modify my thinking and understanding when it comes to relationships, to a point. You've provided nugget for me.
They want a NURSE. And someone to CONTROL. Even if he has money... Don't Do It Ladies. He's sweet for now. BUT, his ATTITUDE will soon change. RUN!!!🏃♀️ 🏃♀️ 🏃♀️
Yep this happen to my sister now she's had to start working part time to take care of her much older sickly husband their whole marriage has been an issue especially with his health problems. I knew he tricked her because he wanted a care taker not a wife
This is so true. I have experience this. I was young and dumb. I married guy 14 years older than me. I Agree with Tony.
I've never been into older men. But I know so many women who date and marry only much older men. And some end up being a nursemaid. Because of health issues that occur.
And lack of sex because of E.D problems.
You have two types of men, you have grown boys, and you have grown men, point blank period! Blessings TG to you and the Queen! 🙏🏾
Sisters, please listen to Mr.Gaskins. He’s telling the 💯 truth! Older men just want to control and manipulate younger women while having an other woman on the side and the audacity to think of themselves as a prize and a younger woman is just a housemaid and a cook.
I'm glad you put this video out. At my church there were men who were old enough to be my father that would flirt with me and try to talk to me. It was really disturbing.
Your not his daughter
That hit hard when you said a “10 year old dating a new born “or a “20 year old dating a 10 year old”. I understand now. Thank you, Tony.
That’s a false equivalence, ya’ll will letch on to anything that strokes your egos.🤦🏾♂️
Glad I watched this video, I’m 23 and this guy I work with is 36 I thought he was 27 but no.That’s a 13 year difference . The way he acts around me I can tell he been plotting, thankfully I dodged a bullet lol uncle Tony ain’t lying💯
I used to tell myself I want to be with an older man because I thought he'd be more mature (which I felt was true), but I wasn't being completely honest with myself because I may have turned away a mature guy closer to my age. Recently I discovered a man who is extremely mature and wise and his wife is actually five years older than him. They are happy and respect each other. So then I thought there may be something deeper than maturity for me wanting to be with an older guy.
I realized there were fears that were influencing my attachment to be with an older man, and this video is confirming a lot of things I'm realizing lately. I am glad my mind has opened and I've opened my options to a man who is closer to my age. You're right women can think that a man closer to their age= less mature, but if he is mature, then what's the excuse? And if an age compatible and older man are both mature, the first case is actually better for a woman because with an older man there are higher chances of being widowed. So while women are going for an older man bc of the perceived pros, there are not that many benefits if you compare a mature young man vs. mature older man.
five years ain't substantially older tho. older really starts at ten years.
Great take on the matter
@@yesihavealastname1562 I would say even older than 10 years, more like 15+ for me.
Wow your extremely self-aware. Great comment 👍
Sir Bless your heart, I concur with all you are saying I was in a 10 yr gap difference for 12 years yes from 20's to 30's and I outgrew him. When tried to leave he called me every name in the book and found every reason to dumb me down. Until I prayed for strength, left and Never returned. He still alone to this day. Loving self is the best and waiting on God
This is a very interesting perspective. My husband is older than me and I absolutely love it! Honestly, I was bored with men my own age and completely DONE with younger men. My husband and I have an amazing relationship, so I feel we are possibly the exception to the rule (my opinion) We have a very strong spiritual compatibility, which helps us a lot in our relationship. I'm grateful for us, and it sort of baffles my mind how blessed we have been.
May I gently ask why you watch Tony’s videos if you have such an amazing relationship? Please don’t be offended, just wondering☺️. Because I would not be here if I was happily married.
@@mymakersdaughter6041 I don’t mean any harm either and I was thinking of asking the exact same question. 🤷🏽♀️
@@mymakersdaughter6041 😂😂💪🏾💪🏾🤦🏽♂️
@@SixFootofFitness 😂😂😂💪🏾🤦🏽♂️
I wanted to ask the same questions above.. why you here if your relationship so perfect?
Thank you so much for this video Tony! I just turned 24 & I caught myself dating grown boys who are in their 30’s. I had this surfaced level mindset that guys older than me are more “mature.” Aaliyah said it best, “age ain’t nothing but a number.” The last grown boy I dealt with was mentally & emotionally immature. Lived with his cousin & his best friend at the age of 33. & even told me he’d be upset if I was sexually active with anybody bc I haven’t given myself up to him yet. The min he said that, I burned that bridge w him & ghosted him like I owed him $5. I met him off tinder too (deleted that app & any other dating app) I refuse to let anybody’s dusty ass son use & manipulate me bc they’re trying to fulfill sexual fantasies. Disgusting! I’m taking your advice Tony & cutting my age limit to 5 years. If you’re older than that, you’re a pervert. Yes, there are exceptions but honestly, that’s just rare at this point of life. Going to be patient & keep working on myself till God places the right MAN in my life! Thank you for all the advice Tony!
You crack me up girl😂😂😂
@@shelleydavis5231 😅😅
@Jackie Hellesoe This is scary familiar because you literally described my ex. He also lives with his cousin and best friend, and is now 34. I don’t like talking negatively on others but that was the most emotionally abusive relationship I’ve ever been in. Kudos to you for seeing red flags in that guy and cutting him off immediately
I'm screaming you said I ghosted him like.i owed him.five dollars I just got kicked out of the library reading this lol
yeah and when you women get old yall secretly try and want to have sex with young attractive men. But then try to shame and call older men perverts for getting with young women. Hopefully God will never place a right man in your life.
This left me feeling so spiritually naked, exposed and vulnerable. You’ve told nothing but the truth. I’ve loved this horror story. Thank God I managed to get away childless, nursing ‘only’ my spiritual and mental wounds. I will NEVER shortchange myself like that again. I am destined to live a prosperous and comfortable life regardless.
Mindset of scarcity be damned!
I dated an older man. He often mentioned wanting total submission. It was more than me listening to him, it was literally him wanting complete control over everything including how I decorated my home. He was rich, but my now husband who is only a year older is richer🤷🏽♀️ Don't get with an older man for security, because that security comes with a lot of BS. Find you someone worth way more than what they bring financially.
Lol me I didn't allow him.
Sounds good. I like having no man (or woman). I know no body asked, just saying being able to absolutely do whatever you want at anytime is so much better than dealing with a relationship. Just not worth it to me.
yeah, i'm a divorced man, and will NEVER get married or do relationships again.
relationships have TOO much compromise, and people are too quick to throw away a relationship instead of fight for it.
i get all the play from women i want by working as a bouncer, and i'm good.
my focus is on my only son and myself, and that's it!
Glad you made this video other videos promoting dating older men make it seem like you about find Denzel Washington. Like tony said you getting insecure and manipulative men. Especially if you haven’t focused on your brand and he hasn’t either. He won’t inspire you, he won’t motivate you , he will feel low cus you have dreams and will diminish them. He is going to slow you down it’s not worth it.
💯💯💯
This is no lie, my ex looked for a younger women 18 years younger she was 20 he 38 and she was lost and confused, she’s close to our daughters age, bought her things, a nice arm trophy, today she’s 31 after he left her and training is over she can’t even move on properly. It’s perverted cause I know what he was doing why he choose her so young...
I honestly feel disgusted by those creepy old dudes
Wowww
What’s y’all cap? I date 10 years older. I’ll admit, I started dating older men when I was young. Definitely had daddy issues. But Now I can’t date a man my age because I’m usually not interested after I realized he’s still building or wants kids etc. I have a strong personality, but I like the traditional way of the man leading and I don’t just date any kind of older guy.
Hmmm...Yeah, as long as they're not creepy and targeting you for misuse, you're fine, but at the root of it, it's for the same reasons...The difference is in how he treats you...
19 years , loool
jnfqt 🤣🤣 that’s when I think it gets sketchy
I'll say 13 is my cap. I've taken the time to know myself so I can definitely be honest with myself and say my attraction to older men is just my natural preference. If I see a man, he looks older, mature, and well put together then naturally I'll find myself attracted. I've met guys around my age who tried to manipulate and control and I've came across older men with that same behavior. On the other hand, I met older men who were genuine about dating and a relationship but after you get to know someone it's just small qualities you don't see yourself being around but not because he has a HUGE deal breaker.
I'm 24, currently I'd say my cap is 8 years lol.
Thank you God for Tony Gaskins Jr. Thank you Tony for continuing to be transparent with us women, the information you are providing is greatly needed.
Amen
God bless him 🙏🏾
Old men also choose young girls for nasty sex acts that women their age want agree with
@@mosthated.e.2422 Vain demon
Tony, you got my mom hollering, “Tell it Tony!!” in the background😂😂
Thank you for sharing your wisdom...this is definitely some of the same things my mom has been telling me over time.
LOOOOVE IT!!!
I met one. But I stand my own ground. I spoke up for myself. Now he's gone for good.
This event happened before I found the clip. To be honest, I never ever regreted what I said to him. Then I found your video is so accurated. Many ppl struggled including myself because of this specific type of man is mentally malnipulative by verbal abused and their stoic mindsets. They dont want to grow.
Your video gave me a strong confirmation. Thank you so much.
Thank you for this. You are speaking the truth to me. This older man is pursuing me and it just feels "off" and listening to you, you validated why it is not setting well with me.
This is 100% true. Most of them also have a serious lust issue and want to be with younger women as s 3 x dolls or as TG would say c-buckets smh! I was approached by a man who 20+ year older than me, I did some research and found out his ex wife had their kids when she was 20 & 22yrs old... she’s 35!! He is 51. 🥴😱🤮
Omg!
@@Yna-u3g my jaws dropped when I did the math. He married her years later to “save face” I guess but WOW these grown “older” boys are horrible!
@@loveofmylifedance Yes they are😳
@@LA-wv7gf They be desperately trying to hang on to youth
*“… I did some research…”* 😂 💯
I was 18 when I had my first relationship with a guy a decade older than me. He didn't take 'no' for an answer and would get upset at me if I tried to refuse sex. I was naive in thinking that it's probs just me, but my god you're right. He was a pervert and extremely manipulative!! I can see that now.
I date older for maturity purposes. Between 2 to 7 years older. It’s just easier in my opinion because they have experience, maturity, and can advise on things. This is not the case all the time. But I have dated around my age. It comes with complications too.
2- 7 years IS around your age, unless you're 16
@@Jeanninecomeau I agree. 7 years is not that much older in mindset and life progress once you hit your 30s
That's not older lol.
I am in my forties and I had an 80 year old man approach me at the grocery store. He told me his age, told me he was actually married but he and his wife live in separate houses! He also wAs bold and stated he doesn’t need Viagra! I busted out laughing! He was trying to give me his number. Ill never forget that. 😂✌🏽
🤪
@@alicehardy8040 he was all dressed up wearing colonge, and I thought to myself, does he come to the store regularly to hunt down women on a regular basis. Creepy!
Lol, he’s trying so hard to add you to his life insurance policy 😅
@@gabrielagarza5811 😅
@@peaceful_and_blessed2879 thats a yes!!
Wow, I didn't know I needed to hear this until you said it. I trust your insight! When I think about it, a man must be insecure if he is choosing someone younger.
He’s is 1000 correct! On so many points! The guy I’m dating now said he dates younger women because he think he’s immature, we’re 9 years apart. I would leave but I’m too far deeply I love with him. I know it’s dangerous but he treats me so well and he’s so smart he had a terrible past and so did I we don’t reflect that on each other but I don’t know . Everyone has problems and issues , he never mistreated me or makes me feel inadequate, we listen to each other …it’s been a year now idk know y’all.
If he’s not controlling , manipulative , narcissistic, etc and not hurting you physically,mentally or emotionally I’d say stay
Live your life! If you’re happy that’s all that matters. This internet shit has nothing to do with your life.
When I was in pain I use to disagree with you soooo much. Now with my healed heart, I really appreciate your messages ❤. Thank you for your honesty
i have never ever ever been attracted to a man older than 2-4 years older than me
its actually a turn off and reminds me of being with a father figure....
i prefer my age or a year or two younger....
my husband is my age and i think thats a good thing...lol
Don’t go chasing waterfalls 🤣🤣🤣 it’s my motto now
Age does not guarantee maturity experience does . referring to men on average and knowing they take a long time to mature . concerning a woman it's takes time for a woman to learn her value to learn her worth and once she does she will not tolerate grown boy tactics it's not enough to sustain her she will get to were she will grow out of that right away once it's shown to her . nothing against younger women but it takes pain and loss and maturity to learn your value until then a grown boy will have a field day with your lack of mental development . But once you do come into learning your worth you will not tolerate a man's nonsense you will be able to decipher a mature man from a boy in a man's body . Thank you for your honesty in this video .
Not even that listen at the 29-31 minute mark. Experience that hasn’t been properly understood and reflected on is just experience.
@@nessparadis6948 well of course I'm referring to proper experience not just any experience .
Tony i really appreciate what you are doing!! I was married to a guy 12 older than me. That wasn’t enough I dated a man 21 years my senior, I’m 39 and he just turn 60. In the beginning I really thought it was organic because you always came to my place of business. I really thought we had a connection, we started dating in October 2017 and I broke up with him October 2020. He abused me physically, mentally, verbally, emotionally, and finically. He is very insecure too. I have always been more mature for my age however, I’m not dating anyone who is not within an appropriate age range. Again thank you for what you are doing
Had the same experience and he is now still looking for younger women ...can't be happy with an attractive intelligent women who brings something to the table . The man I dated ..was accusing , abusive and very immature and not very intelligent or interesting. He needed a younger woman because I truly believe deep down he never grew up. Old and searching women out due to his sick thoughts and ideas. I pulled his card and sent him packing . Just disgusting. Thanks for your input. I also think they are so insecure they are needing validation.
@@tinaryan7059 you are absolutely right! My ex was dating a young girl whom could have been his granddaughter he was 61 and she 20. He was very immature, controlling, and perverted! I’m so thankful I broke up with him. However, the flesh gets weak but I have to remind myself I’m more worthy and don’t deserve him, I deserve much better
@@kimberlydwilson6544 sister I am praying for us both . Broke it off with mine after finding him looking up how to get young women to talk to him on UA-cam matter of fact. It's a little lonely . Figured I would throw myself into work . Just tired in my soul. Feel free to message me on here if it will let you . I always try to help like friends. We are woth diamond's and more rare than any precious stone according to God. Some people will never be just thankful. I want to marry my best friend next time. Here's to a good prayer and alot of faith !🙏
Same thing here with every older man I dated, I will pass.
💎Having knowledge and experience don’t mean you have wisdom, wisdom comes from God💎
That is why older men envy younger men with money because they know they can't compete
The majority of the older men that I know and am related to and associate with are ALL multimillionaires (MAJORITY!) Most are happily married and accomplished …which is how we know each other. But at 65 I can still tap out the majority of untrained men …regardless of age or size and many trained men who are “young.”
I don’t know what delusional world YOU live in but their is absolutely NOTHING to “compete” for or about. But, in general, there is NO “competition!” Even if we’re talking exclusively about “younger men with money!”
You see, one thing that both Warren Buffet and I learned long ago is that once you reach a certain level …money is no longer an issue and there truly is not a vast amount of disparity in what you’re able to have or what you’re able to do. In other words if I were to become a multiBILLIONAIRE and upgraded from being s multiMILLIONAIRE …what would change? …Absolutely *_NOTHING!_*
My lifestyle would be EXACTLY as it is now. There is NOTHING that I need that I don’t already have. It would just be more money to give away. I would still be equally as frugal and down to earth as I am now. And my wife is the same way. Neither of us is easily impressed with material. In fact SEVERAL of the wealthy older men I know have dramatically DOWNSIZED their lifestyle and the size of their homes in order to live a simpler life.
I know of NO “younger men with money” that ANY older man (who is a REAL man with money) could possibly “envy!” I find that those who floss the least often have the MOST and especially with young men …who so often are INSECURE and feel a need to prove something; with them, those who floss the most and are the most materialistic often have the LEAST!
You are not even in the same LEAGUE so therefore YOU are not even in a position to “compete” because you are NOT even allowed to sit at the table if all you have is being a (snicker) “young man with money.” Lions don’t care about the opinions of antelopes.
I love older men. I don’t take them serious when it comes to A relationship.
I love them too. I feel attracted for them and I love the power they make you feel because your presence is delightful in his eyes. Right now I'm dating a man on his 40s but our relationship is transactional, so It's not that bad. I really like this guy but I'm aware of how manipulative he can be, so that's what I'm watching these videos
@@sewblue187 dont worry, i guess some people is more serious and some just want to live the moment. Yes you're right, it would be complicated for an old man TO take seriously a young woman. I had a cold shower of reality this weekend
My my my Mr Gaskins you are hitting the nail on the head i dated a guy who was 22 years older than me and u are truly helping me to understand the reason behind this man totally disrespecting me he doesn’t value my opinion at all as a matter of fact he doesn’t even want to hear my opinion he has told me why don’t you just shut up. It truly hurts to know that I actually loved him and thought he loved me but after listening to Mr Gaskins i am sure that love has nothing to do with his intentions but he will not be able to use me anymore cause i am out
I have experiences exactly what you are saying oh my goodness what you saying makes everything make sense that i went through while dating him i ended up leaving it wasn’t for me
Can u also do a topic with "why young men like older women" I wonder Mr Gaskins! God bless!
Yes please! I keep attracting younger men 😐
It might have something to do with notches in the belt. He said that grown boys are obsessed with notches and want to taste every flavor of the rainbow: black, white, old, young, blonde, brunette, mixed, asian etc.
YESSSSSSSS💫💫💫👍👍
Yessss please. Because that topic needs to be discussed too.
I'm enjoying knowing my younger men🙂
What's embarrassing is when you look a lot younger than you actually are and these 19- 25 year olds get attracted to ya I kinda laugh it off
That's a compliment though lol
@Golden Girl what’s you’re Instagram we probably the same age I’m 26 do you have Instagram @ ?
Tony I totally agree age does not equal wisdom.People do not believe this if a person doesn't seek to change they will stay the same.
OMG!!! You are describing my was-band of 20 years. Lord, I am so glad another man is speaking out about it. He was the type that believed that only other MEN outside the household was able to chime in about issues WITHIN our household. Tony is speaking the ABSOLUTE TRUTH...the kicker is that I met him at church! BEWARE BEWARE BEWARE
thanks Concerned