You will see in these comments why men, even good men, have a hard time telling the truth. Because when the truth doesn’t fit our fantasies, we are set on finding out the hard way. I even posed this question to my 16 year old son, and at 16 he knows that a man is not GENUINELY attracted to and desiring a relationship with a woman 10 or more years than him. And that is why I tell women all the time that y’all are falling for grade school games, and assume that because a man tells you he genuinely likes you, he’s telling the truth… and also, there exceptions to the rule, and if it’s an exception, we aren’t discussing that. This is about the majority. But I gotta keep telling the truth for those who are wise enough to hear.
Ughh Tony you were spot on, I'm only 30 but I've been through almost everything you just said. At least, now I know how he got my credit card number. 😫😭
I get it, I’ve experienced the nonsense that comes from dealing with a younger man…but honestly it wasn’t much different when the dude was 6 years older (I was 33 at the time). A player or immature man comes in all shapes and sizes…lol. But for real, what are we supposed to do if we’re 40+ ? Should we just give up all together? I’m sick of being single!!
I am 60 and have been told repeatedly that I look 40. Yes, I have dated much younger men and I have to agree with you. The younger man usually has mommy issues or they are looking at your stability. Now, this is how you are going to weed them out. 1. Start talking about how you are looking for a provider and that you are a queen looking for your king. 2. Tell them that you do not loan money or pay for dates. 3.Inform them that you do not believe in shacking because that is reserved for marriage. 4. Communicate to him that you do not let a man drive your car because you don't have another $80,000 to replace it and he is not on your auto insurance policy. Now he is going to continue to talk with you briefly but it won't be long before he realizes that you are dead serious. Next, you will probably get a stupid text telling you that he does't think that the two of you are compatible and or he doesn't feel a connection. Sometimes he may put you in the friend zone so just in case he hits rock bottom, he feels he can ask you for something. Simply tell your playboy that you don't have any room in your life for any new friends. (You can thank me later)
What if you just avoid them altogether, save yourself the time of having to explain yourself, and place your attention to men who more age appropriate?
Heck I just experienced this yesterday! I'm 63 and he is 69. We "seemed" compatible for a week, but then his true colors began to show. Trying to escalate the talk to a more physical nature. When that was getting him no where he said "I don't think we are compatible and said we could be friends. Now tell me, what kind of "friends" do you think he wanted to be when we are "not compatible " but he wanted something physical? Men think we are stupid or desperate or something. Blocked and deleted!
Actually, you're allowing way too much! I'm 60 also & look 40 with the younger tighter skin, no stretch marks ever & had two kids! I workout, I have a great body structure, and have always had a flat stomach with small waistline... etc! #1. When approached, I immediately let them know my real age & that I don't entertain men my Sons age 40 & 38. So, even if they are 10-15:years younger than me... NO exceptions! Therefore, there's absolutely no reason to give them my #... PERIOD! 2. If a man can't match what I have or more: his own. House, Car, Career, and Financially stabled, w/ low debt & Good Crefit.... then, there's no conversation to be had! Ladies, always know your Worth & Never Settle! I've never been that woman who would "pray" for a man & I've been married twice!! Both my sons are from the 1st marriage! I've retired from two careers by age 58 & I've been divorced 15yrs! I have 0 tolerance & I WILL NOT settle for "anything" just to say that I have a man! The only debt I have is my mortgage & I own both of my "high brand" model vehicles & don't nobody drive them but ME. And only I have access to my home! I know my worth, I have high standards, and I don't fall for ANYTHING! That said, Tony is correct in everything he's sharing about both men & MOST women! My point: not ALL women are as vulnerable & we do use our commonsense! 😉
I agree on this one. There are many women who are older that will run track around ladies my age. A lot of my generation are so toxic and OUT of shape. Flabby youthful and out of shape!
I'm not completely diagreeing with the man (Tony here) but I am going to add my 2 cents in. It really just boils down to looks, not so much age. If a woman in her early 40s is really attractive, she will receive attention from men in their late 20s and early 30s. If a woman is not good looking in her 20s, men would still pay more attention to that attractive 40 year old if they're both in a room. Also, be watchful of ALL people you date. Whether they are younger, older, your age. Does NOT matter. There's gold diggers of all ages. Be vigilant period.
I agree with you about the appearance. I am 35 and i am dating a 21 year old guy. I tried to avoid him but here we are. He always tells me how beautiful and sexy i am. Lol btw i don’t look like my age as an asian woman I usually attract younger guys.
Im 45 and i agree. This is a terrible age to be single. The older men want 20 and 30 somethings and the younger ones wanna eat good and drive your car.🤦♀
Why are older men so confident that women in their 20s and 30s want them for anything outside of money? I don’t get why their audacity is so high when they are average at best.
I wouldn't date a younger man, he's still try to figure out this thing called "life" which leaves him immature, unstable financially and total waste of time, he will end up setting me back in life.
Depends on what you consider younger. A younger man can have all the things you have. A lot of older don’t have much to show for all their years on this earth. There are exceptions to the rule.
Great advice because investing in a man not your husband is a huge mistake that you will never unravel so walk about and don't let him take you for your money or for anything else.
I’m sticking to my priciple of never giving a man a nickle. Im okay with buying reasonably priced gifts, but I can’t respect nor entertain a man that needs my dollar.
The same is true on the reverse. Older men are typically only appealing to young women because older men have more money. Young men are much more physically attractive and have more stamina than older men. Most women of all ages (including young women) physically prefer young strong men with good heart health and blood circulation. So this is not surprising to me.
@@genovasquez8361 yeah and you are totally not lying sooo hard right now..😂Brother i am 18. No young woman actually likes muuch older men. Some sellout for money which i would never do. There are also some mentally ill young women that had trauma from their fathers, they have father issues so you probably got with those. No healthy young woman would rather pick a middle aged man over a 27 ye old man
@bratesta that's why I cringe at these videos...women understand this about young men FOR THE MOST PART. A few lil dollars aint hurting nothing...keeps them from having to play nurse to an old dude.
When I was 22 my bf at the time cheated with an older woman. She was in her late 30s. She got pregnant and he called me to tell me because he didn't want me to find out from other people. Years later now they have moved overseas and have 2 kids. He still checks on me. But some women actually live happy lives with younger guys.
It can happen but likely not…I’m not upset at all about my age. I also believe that if I’m supposed to be with someone I will…if not then that is Gods will
@@tarag7292 to be honest I got over it so quick. She was financially stable and had a great career. She made a difference in his life so😹 I had to accept defeat. A
Ladies know your worth, know your value but most importantly have a relationship with God, no matter what age you are. Be careful who you entertain and always use discernment.
As a 45 year old woman, I can tell you for a fact that when women my age get with much younger (10+ years younger) men, we typically aren't taking it seriously either. As women, we do want love but there are certain periods where it is just for the thrill.
@@ieshjust16 No, I don't even think it's that. There are women who have been married, divorced, or who are just single, who happen to hook up with a much younger man during a time in their lives when they want to be single. I think it's untrue to assume that these older women are looking at these younger men as potential partners. In fact, that's usually not the case.
@KJ-yb2wf I guess I have to explain this like would explain it to a child. No, most older women do not want younger men. But when we do, I promise you that it's just for fun. Are you an older woman, or a woman at all? Don't try to challenge me. There is no fantasy about being with much younger men. But when it happens it is NOT something that a woman really wants long term. Period.
Im a 39 year old woman without children.... Most men around 50 or 60 want a relationship with me. They make me feel sick. Because they are my mothers age. Some of them have daughters my age. So im going younger.
Yep! That’s what they do! Old ass men don’t want mature women their age. It’s been this way since the dawn of time beloved. Enjoy wanting younger men for now. That’ll change for you as you start getting old-around 45 you’re probably not gonna want a younger man cause they all still cheat and will try and run game. Good luck but I feel you on not wanting the older men-hell I’m 52 and I damn sure don’t want no man in their 60s but I don’t want a younger man either. I guess I’m just assed out at this point.
You do just that "go younger" or stay in your own age range. An older man most of them will go after someone your age because it makes them feel younger and they feel as if they have accomplished something huge to get a young woman. Plus another thing they believe they can control a younger woman since she does not have as much experience as an older woman in many cases. If they make you feel sick as you conveyed, then they are not the ones for you if they have daughters your age which is "sickening."
So basically the older you get no one wants you because the men your age are seeking younger women and the younger men are also seeking the same so basically women are only looked at from a fleshly point of view no matter what else she has to offer...you're only worthy if you are considered "fresh" i.e you're young, even when you're young and have the so called "mileage" 😂...Eish how sad all this vanity is. Coz the sad reality is, everybody is going to get old.
Well, when I think about it; nowadays many young women have more mileage than some older women because of how relationships are today; multiple men, multiple kids by the age of 30, a woman can be washed up. Not all older women slept around like that.
I think men as they grow older and see younger men looking at their wives-turn to strategy. So they say, "Lets make it clear that noboby wants old ladies. " You might be listening to a narc and dont know it. Beware, narcs will look so innocent while killing your self confident and esteem at the same time. Ladies dont swallow abuse. Remember in the bible Sarah was 90 and the men wanted her. Watch out for narcs.😮
I am in healthcare. Women are now faced with men *****50 plus with all of their health issues (high blood pressure/diabetes/gout/depression/obesity). Some Women are dating younger.
Exactly! U know I’m just tired of men putting such emphasis on a woman’s age, body and financial status but meanwhile young and old they are literally a damn mess!! Why are women so subjected to this at all cost??
@kimkitty3914 Not saying that a 6-10 year gap relationship won't work but I think ppl are more compatible in a 5 year old radius. They usually lived in an Era of time of historical events of culture, music, economics, fashion, upbringing etc.
I already know what you’re going to say, because I lived through it. I had an honest relationship with authentic attraction with a younger man for three years. It did not last because it was not feasible. Our differences in maturity were not readily observable in the first six months. But as we were living together for nearly 3 years those quiet parts became louder. Things that he was still fascinated with I had already experienced, and had no more interest in. And it couldn’t be any other way, because he did not have the time on this earth to learn the things that I took for granted. however, he healed my heart from a lot of trauma and pain, and I will forever be grateful to him for that. When we separated, I was more Whole than I had ever been in my life, and I have continued to grow and prosper ever since. That was three years ago now and I am still happily single. I have never been so content and happy in my life. I think I owe a lot of that to the innocent form of love he willingly gave me.
I understand. My guy pursued me for fun & physical intimacy. We both went forward, eyes open. It was grand & glorious. It was a relationship of respect. I was myself for the first time ever,,I didn't give up myself to please a man..I liked me & he liked me. I'm grateful to him. It all depends on the individuals as you can't make general statements for the masses. No regrets.
That's so beautiful!! Your greatitude and trust restored . Those 3 years sounds as if there was healing . Past 3 years I've needed time to heal. Not even interested in dating or desiring being in a relationship. I'm greatful for peace and quiet. Focusing on my health and the Lord . That's where my healing comes from . No more treating a man like he's God. Enjoying peace 🕊️ and solitude.
THANK YOU FOR TRUTH!!!! The only thing I want to add is beware of the ones who will also marry you to cover up their deception, if they realize how desperate you are for marriage. If they don’t care about, lying, manipulating, and using you, then they definitely won’t care about insincere marriage promises. I am 52 with 3 grown children and 2 grandchildren and I learned this today from you, just now. He not only stayed “down on his luck” as he called it, but he tried to get half of everything in the divorce, including my 401 and assets. He even tried to get alimony. Thankfully he opened his mouth during a rant and said, “I don’t want anything from her”, and the judge didn’t allow him to change it. Please ladies listen intently to what this man is saying to you. I did and I’m forever grateful for the many ways that God is healing me. You sir are serving God and serving people….thank you.
I'm also greatful to hear truth spoken. I believe he's very compassionate and realizes womans needs and our vulnerability as a middle aged or older woman. When we believe it's love then it's so sad how we can be blindsided and or see the red flags. He's seen the aftereffects of women being abandoned and betrayed. It's really hard to trust again and be used again. If there's. Less manipulation and lies with dating a man a little older or younger, or exactly. Our age ..... Then why not set a boundary to lesson the chance of abuse , manipulation , liee, to occur as we are aging. I never get caught up in you look.decades younger. I desire a man to respect and look at my inner beauty more so then my appearance or turning myself into a pretzel 🥨 in bed . I'm ok with intimacy and not sex. Romance, not lust. Respect not disrespect. An honest man with similar values that I hold and not a player or untrustworthy man. Be wise out there. Be careful. Trust your intuition. Thank you for this message , . It was confirmation.
In terms of "mileage", many younger females have had way more sexual partners than alot of older women. The young ones are wild n out busy acting like City Girls. SMH
@@thelmathomas9399 Men like younger women I know I was more attractive when I was 25 v 35 At 25 i had men of all races looking at me In the modeling industry a woman nearing 30 is nearing the end of her career We didn't make the rules Nature did
This might have hurt my feelings if I hadn't already discovered this truth on my own. Once upon a time, when I dated much younger men, what saved me from ruin was a philosophy that I have always lived by: I don't give men money. I agree with 99% of what you said. Like you said, some women will not listen. I know a woman in her late 60s who moved across the world to be with a man less than half her age. She works 3 jobs to finance his lifestyle which, I'm pretty sure includes a wife and children since he's Muslim. He told her he was married to another woman to get German citizenship, which he claimed she demanded $10K for. That, my friend, was the first setup to get in her purse. The best antidote to being scammed by a man, younger or otherwise, is to love yourself so fiercely that you're willing to see and accept the truth. Just don't adopt his lies as your own. Remember, he's a party...not a partner. And don't give him money and he'll soon leave.
I’m 40 and I look BETTER than I did in my 20s. I look younger than my boyfriend who is 30?!? The exception. He’s leading & had everything before we met -I’m not in this man’s way lol
Wow that’s true, I look so young for my age and I feel young as well and I’m more sexually active than my younger partner. How about that he acts like a old man he wants it once a month😂
Same here! I’m in my 40’s and run circles physically and mentally around 20 year old men (and women). I get approached all the time by guys of all ages but I agree with what Tony says. FACTS. A man’s got to have sense in every category, be able to communicate properly, be genuine, be stable in every category, and not be looking for a mommy AT ANY AGE. And it sure does help if he can get it up still…
This is Not true for all. There are many of us that look real good for our age, skin also beautiful. Halle & Jennifer both struggle real hard throughout the decades with their relationships -young or older men. There are so many in relationships 7-12 gap that's healthy. Alike, there are a tremendous amount of garbage relationships. What I'm saying is a lot of us are the Exception. My relationship is 3 yrs strong and we are an 10yr gap and engaged. Yes, he didn't know my exact age for the 1st year, but by then he told me he loved me and never wants this love to end. We've been engaged now for 9 months. Sometimes it turns out well. He is 39 & takes me out still, surprises me with gifts still, dances with me, fills my vehicle up still, vacations still, pays for everything still with the exception of me tipping at dinner or me saying hold on, let me pay for your haircut this time.
Don't be disillusioned. He never said the exceptionally (genetically blessed) ones have better relationships. He said that men are not generally sexually attracted to most women older than 4o. I am 51, in fantastic shape, blessed with body, skin, face etc and the men keep calling....but guess what, Tony is still spewing FACTS!!!!!!
Honestly, in this day and age, finding a marriage minded man who is worth marrying is something to celebrate 💐 congratulations! I've been watching for a year and I think while this is all good info, it's not gonna cover everything that's out there. And that's ok; the goal is to increase the likelihood of finding a good man with this knowledge. Tony keeps me equipped with the right tools to keep on keeping on.
I would still be cautious until you are actually married! I mean if you’re sleeping together, you’re living in sin. That means God’s not running, so the enemy can blow it up at any moment!
My oldest brother & wife just celebrated their 25th wedding Anniversary he is younger 49 she is 58 they have 2 children out Of high school she works from home & he works as a supervisor at a medical company there home is almost paid off they have 3 cars several dogs etc a family man he is not into any outside mess he always on the job and in the yard lord lol... they have done wonderfully together over the yrs it works for some not all..myself never been in a relationship with a man no more than 5 to 6 yrs older I am 47 my son n daughter are out on their on I'm loving my singlenes celibate until I remarry divorced in 2008 ...decided not 2 date anymore too games because I know what I desire been their done that ...great info Tony👍💜
Excellent message! Unfortunately I know of a few women who have fallen victim to these games played by younger men. Heartbreaking because the women had genuine feelings for the men. So cruel.
Why women are still listening to men tell them who and what they are is beyond me. Love yourself, keep your body healthy and fit, and continuously invest in yourself and then allow a man that is vibrating on the same frequency to pursue you….everything else is just noise designed to destroy your self esteem
I'm 63 & established. Happily single don't even care to date. People think I'm in my 40's I have a 37 year old guy hitting on me, I mean chasing hard Lol I explained to him that 63 & 37 is BAT CRAP CRAZY & every woman that crosses his path is not meant to be a love connection. There is no way I believe he has any good intentions for me, but I have continued great plans for me & he will not be allowed to steer me off course.
By the grace of God. I am 60 and get hit on daily by younger men. I giggle to myself and move on down the road. Get a closer relationship with Jesus and God will bless you. Jesus Christ is Lord.😊
You are absolutely right! That 37 year old has NO good intentions for you because you could be his mom and why would he want that. He is no doubt looking for something that you have and thereafter he will share it and use it on another woman who will be "younger." You are right don't waste your time and he needs to keep on tracking but in another direction.
I am 62 yrs old and I have dated men 10yrs younger. It's not the age of a person, it's the level of maturity. Some men my age r still immature. I don't date a lot for certain reasons. I am comfortable in my own skin and don't mind being alone. I am stable but so r the younger men that I have dated. So no one has the right to judge another based on age. Think about it. No one is perfect. Everyone is looking for something. R we equally yoked or does one have more to offer than the other? Can we compromise? There r many facts to be considered in a relationship. As long as the 2 ppl involved can come to an amicable agreement, the matter of public opinion carries no weight.
I certainly understand because I am older than you are and look younger than I am people tell me. I do think that I am aging gracefully thank God. Anyway, Tony is right you can look great and younger, but the body is aging and is not the same as when we were younger; that comes with age. I also believe that older women must be very careful and understand what a younger man is actually looking for which is usually a place to stay, a car to drive, and whatever funds you might have in your account can attract a younger guy who means no good for an older woman. Many times he is playing games and is a player most of the time. Also, he will use the older woman to get the money he needs while he is going behind her back spending it on a younger woman with "your money." Of course, there are exceptions to the rule we know that there are some genuine men who truly love older women and they feel more comfortable with older women in lieu of his own age. I have met young men believe it or not from 27 to 40's which is ridiculous! I do not meet too many men my own age. I really believe something is wrong with the younger men who go after older women and I sense they have a real problem and need to seek professional help and especially go to God and ask him to help them make better decisions as to who they need to choose. I doubt that women who are cougars are in the mix for a guy who is way too young for her is interested in her for real.
My advice: Just don't do it; once you learn of his age, don't get involved. The time wasted could be time spent on improving yourself and attracting a man in your age group.
Thanks so much for this Tony! Although I look much younger than 57 and divorced, I realize my time has passed. Its time I focus on my purpose in life and live for God!
That's ridiculous. Women will ALWAYS be sought after as long as they take care if their health and try to look their best. My grandmother is in her 80s and she still dresses up, is chic and takes care if herself.
My man is 30, mature and has his life together. I am 50 something. We have a genuine connection and love and we have no issues. He has his money and I have mine. He’s not benefiting from me financially any more than I benefit from him. We’re equal. Only difference is in have more life experience. We work against all odds but we work. We’re happy and moving forward. One day it will end but it would be the same if he were my same age. We thoroughly enjoy our time together, love on each other and that’s it.
Yup it’s so sexist! When I was 30 people thought I was 18! I’m 43 now and aging very well and I see tons of women my age and older that are absolutely stunning!!! I hear it all the time younger men love older woman and not just to use them for money. This younger generation of women a lot of them don’t follow old fashioned ways and sleep around and a lot of younger men want us older women because we are old fashioned and more into one on one commitment. A lot of young men wish they could have a beautiful old fashioned woman!
I listened to this two to three times and agreed with every word. I am 62 years and an attractive woman, but I have that much sense that I am getting older. Women generally and men fight the time clock because the clock doesn't go backwards, and what we once was, we are not anymore. Period Now you can good genes, but the clock still goes forward. And if you are blessed in that area, you are blessed but still getting older while being blessed. I have been approached by men ten years or more, and Mr. Gaskins is correct. You are really not the exception to the rule. You are a notch or something else to fill a need or motive, but not the exception. If you do not allow God to temper you and give you wisdom about men, life, yourself and the game, you will have your head up in a cloud thinking "oooooo, I got it like that." And you may have it like that , but the reality is "why do they want someone with a decade difference in age?" After going through a hard fall with it and learning the lesson, you hear me, I choose to learn the lesson rather repeating it, God's wisdom will show you Truth and you have to choose Truth. And when I am approached now, God always leads me back to sound teaching on the subject of relationships and uses Mr. Gaskin is one of the voices. Ladies, ask God to place someone in your life that He can trust because He cares about you being duped and gamed. It may be hard because waiting for someone, but it will be worth the wait while keeping your peace and purse.
Wow... That was amazing what you've written!!! You made me cry a needed cry... I felt every word. Thank you for sharing and being so real and honest. I am sorry for all you've had to endure I don't know you but I feel as if you are a Very Beautiful Spirit & Human!!! I wish you only happiness,healing & peace. Again thank you for what you've written. God Bless 🙏
While I agree with everything you said from a broader perspective, I do think there are some younger men who are starting to look at women differently. I've had conversations with younger guys about why they are attracted to older women and the main thing say is that they prefer dating older women because younger women are too much drama. When I think about it, I can understand why they say that. A lot of these younger females are a flat-out hot mess! Their morals, values and lack of integrity leave a lot to be desired in a lot of cases. While a lot of men's behavior is driven by their primal instincts, on a certain level they also want to be with a woman that they perceive as having value. Value in the sense that she is of higher quality in terms of the content of her character. I don't know any man who wants to be with a woman he doesn't trust or have any respect for. They also want to be with a woman who has qualities that they feel will bring out the best in them. A lot of times younger guys see qualities in older women that they just don't find in younger women. It's not necessarily that they have mommy issue, they just don't want to invest their time and energy in younger women because they find the qualities they see in them to be unattractive. Older women, for the most part, tend to conduct themselves in a much more sophisticate way. They tend to be much more self-confident and self-assured, which are extraordinarily attractive qualities, so from that perspective the attraction makes sense.
PREACH QUEEN PREACH ..JUST KEEP PURSE 👛 CLOSE CARD HOME IN SAFE CARRY CASH AND SHARE BANKING ,CAR..HOME..KEYS WITH NO ONE A LOT OF TONY KNOWLEDGE IS TRUE ..HOWEVER QUEEN YOU ON POINT OMGOODNESS PLEASE DROP YOUR MIC .YOU SERVED THIS TRUTH STREIGHT WITH NO CHASER. I LOVE THIS .BLESS YOU AND ALL QUEENS ON EARTH OF ALL AGES .PROTECT THAT HEART AND THAT GIFT BUT ALONE THE CORRECT ONE IN .GOD WILL SEND HE WILL REALLY SEND TO YOU .GOOD COMES TO THOSE WHO WAIT 😘
Most younger men don’t even care if you’re “sophisticated” or not. They want whatever will benefit them in anyway they’re craving at that time😭, they’ll say younger women are too much drama simply because they have self respect & won’t value them as much or believe their lies the way a desperate, older woman would. And this is not for ALL but it’s a truth that I’ve witnessed more than a few times.
I agree. I don’t really look my age 68 and men are attracted to me as young as 35. I have 6 grown male kids. Had the oldest one when I was young so he is 51. So no way I’m dating a man younger or same age as my sons. Dating younger is not my cup of tea. I’m not that girl who is gonna show up with a 51 yr old bf just not. I’m fully mature and know what boundaries to set in my life.
Well at 63 I dont want a 73 plus year old man either so we ALL are screwed because in our society EVERYONE wants youth and yet we ALL are getting older by the day.
Now what he said about older women having more mileage on them and then wanting younger for that reason! This is an ignorant assumption.. some women haven’t been run thru or with a bunch of men.
This message is completely believable to me because younger women are not genuinely sexually attracted to older men either. Both the younger men and the younger women are genuinely attracted to the pocketbook and the wallet.😂
I think younger men are genuinely interested in sexual encounters with an older woman because in many cases she could be more experienced and he wants to experience her due to that. Also, as Tony mentioned he wants a Knot in his belt to say he has been with the older woman and she thinks that she has gotten her groove back as he conveyed as well. Good advice and video! Yes, they are after the pocketbook most of the time because there are a lot of scammers out there and women do need to protect herself. Never ever give a man any money whatsoever unless you are married and he has something to bring to the table just like you have. Don't let that young man make a fool out of you; it is senseless! Don't let him take you to the bank and use your money on a young woman or to satisfy himself in other ways.
looooooooooooooool exactly!!! I agree 100% with everything he said, and you can just replace the "older woman" with "older man" and the "young man" with "younger woman" and everything will still fit PERFECTLY! LOOOOOOLLL Just wait for an older man to stop paying things for his beuatiful younger wife to see what happens! LOOOOOLLL I am, as a woman, NOT HURT AT ALL by his words, he only said the truth.
Some are the older ones are scamming and playing games. I’m not helping a man no matter the age, you not living with me, you not driving my car, I’m not giving a man a damn thing 🤷🏽♀️
They should at least be on their own in the first place however women are never financially invested in a man and if they are that man should be worth it like I helped make money in stocks, fix cars, and promoted her business to make more. Not all men are takers
Thanks for the words of wisdom. As a divorced ,older woman who wouldn't mind being in a healthy relationship with a man someday, I never even considered a younger man. After seeing this video, I appreciate your advise. As a believer, I want God's best,not what satisfies my flesh. Discernment is key! Thanks again. Love this message❤
I’d never trust a younger man’s intentions towards me no matter how good I looked. There are too many younger women who also look good. There’s a reason they’re not going that route. 🤔 Genuinely attracted to and serious about having a forever relationship with are drastically different things.
IKR....I dated a man 6yrs younger than me....we married.....it was the worse thing I ever went thru....thats whn I was introduced to therapy 😢....thank God for deliverance 🙏
I’ve had multiple younger men approach me over the past 15 years and I have asked them why they want to date older females and one of the main reasons they told me is because a lot of these younger women sleep around heavily, I’m taking about 20 year old women have slept with 15-20 or more men! I’m 43 and that’s more than I been with in my life, a lot of younger men are attracted to older women for good reasons and they don’t care if a women has a few wrinkles or gray hair and besides there are people in their 20s and 30s that have wrinkles, over weight, have cellulite and gray hair! Age is just a number. I don’t see the big deal of someone dating a man 5-15 years younger when men date girls young enough to be their daughter or granddaughter!
These younger women, as well as women my age, are so blessed to have you pouring such wisdom into our lives. I am 68 years of age with discernment from God, and I can say that you are teaching nothing but the TRUTH!! It might be tight, but it’s right!! Blessings to you and your family, Tony. THANK YOU!!
I also have dated and married boys 10yrs younger, big mistake, they had mommy issues and were abusive, I had 3 kids but took good care of myself but was not totally committed to God and was led stray like a dog thank God I got out alive... I'm single and loving it, totally committed to God..keep telling the truth Tony! We as women are blinded by sex...
I am 53 & was living with a 37yr old last year. He was dead broke & I offered to help & paid for everything BUT I loved it. You know why? POWER. Now I understand what its like to be the main provider & understand why a man who pays for everything "plays" with everything. So just be mindful of this. Keep your financial independence & never put all your eggs in one basket as relationships only seem to last these days btw 5-7yrs. Live your best life. Would I do it again & pay for everything? Never. I wanted to see what it was like & I have no regrets.
Younger women only want men 10 to 20 years older for security, and daddy issues. So truly this message applies to older men and women. You are most definitely speaking the truth, receive this message ladies and you're getting it for free.
I can agree with this for many cases. In my 20s I never wanted a guy in his 30s or 40s. Just someone in my own age group. That made me feel more comfortable.
@@genovasquez8361 you just explained it at the end… You must be fine! 🤣…. I liked older men in my late teens. Very short lived. I grew up with athletes, coaches etc. After that I just wasn’t comfortable with liking someone 10 years my junior or 10 years my senior.
Security is important to every woman! Trust and believe, even women, who were born and raised in nuclear families and who do Not have "daddy issues, want security. Nothing New!
This reminds me of that movie “A Fall from Grace.” The man swooped in and played this older woman and destroyed her livelihood. Excellent take as always Tony.
I appreciate this guidance Tony. I’m 44 and definitely need a man’s perspective on this topic. Always appreciate your raw honesty and we definitely as woman need to be open to that unfiltered conversation. Thank you again.
Ive been a fan for a while but I didnt know exactly how honest you are until this video. Wish I wouldve seen it a long time ago! What you described these younger men will do & how far they will in fact go, happened to me, everything you said including the encouragement of his younger ex the whole time, was true! Took me for a 4yr run im still shocked about! He almost ruined my entire life for pure entertainment that him & his ex in the end, got back together to laugh in my face. Got played more than I couldve ever imagined was humanly possible and it was pure evil/hateful. Im 46now, multiple kids, and no matter what I try to do, men are definitely not interested anymore! Before that guy I was on the best track of my life for an older single mom, was good & looked good. I wasted it on the first younger, fast talking, player I had ever met. Thank you for doing this video, it was all true & it does happen.
Don't even triiiipp BooMa! We're still here and loved by the most High. Let's lean more on GOD and His guidance of our steps! That separation and the harsh circumstances that push us away hurt, but GOD I'm happy for You. We gotta be so happy about the truth being revealed! Whheeww..GOD ain't no joke. It's like HE says not My Daughter... It happened. We expect People to be genuine. Let all the embarrassment etc etc! I thank GOD that He ripped You from the foolishness You didn't see. YEESS You saved Your Babies from a future wolf! 🙌 Yeesssss You're free to be still with You/GOD. Let's all promise to embrace our solitude, pour into our own hearts, and focus on all the promises GOD has surrounded us with.
Very greatful. Wish I knew this inf. when I was in my 2Os and 30 and add on 2 more decades after that. 😢😮😂. Im the oldest of 4 sisters and the youngest was my brother. Had know idea how the game worked. Some of us go through hell and back again. I'm greatful to live my life in peace and feel complete being single. Enjoying my life more being single then being in a toxic relationship.
Tony gives good advice and I believe if you go to the Lord in prayer and ask him to guide you, the Lord will do just that. He will never fail you but wants the very best for you as you encounter men in your life. Just don't be vulnerable and desperate since men can pick that up quickly. Let me tell you a quick story, "A gentleman told me that women would come out of the store after shopping and flirt with him while he was sitting in the car to take people home from a livery service. He mentioned that he was not interested in them because they were pursuing him instead he noticed that the lady who did not do that caused him to be interested in her. After he got to talk to her, he asked for her phone number and the rest is history. They later got married and have a baby girl. He said he is so happy how things worked out and could not wait to get off work to go home and enjoy his little daughter and his wife!" That is a short story which is reality. So, wait on God to send you who He wants you to have at the right time if marriage is what you desire. Take care and be blessed.
This is right on time for me because a lot of younger guys are hitting on me since I have turned 41. I don't take it seriously, nor do I entertain it. I look at them side ways 👀 because we have absolutely nothing in common. Thank you for confirming my intuition about what is really going on. I appreciate your honesty 💯 Be blessed 🙏🏾
As a woman in my mid-40s, I am so happy that you are addressing this topic, Mr. Gaskins. You are confirming what I know to be true. I ask God to continue to sharpen my discernment and maintain my peace. I rather be told what I NEED to hear as opposed to what I WANT to hear. This message is helping me in my healing process. Tyler Perry's movie A Fall from Grace depicted this message Tony is speaking on. Grace's younger husband pull the bait and switch.
A woman is played because she let her guards down and became vulnerable and desperate most of the time. Sometimes people do things out of loneliness. Don't do that.
I agree age matters. A man that’s 10 years younger than a woman is looking for security. It’s the same with a woman that’s 10 years younger than a man she wants security, too. The reason it doesn’t look that bad for a man to be a cake daddy to a woman is because men are looked at as providers. I am 43 and I want to date a man that’s 50-55 for security. I want love too, but finances matter.
@@genovasquez8361 if she is 10 years younger than you, she is in no rush. She will take the time to wait you out. You will eventually spend money. Women are smart. It’s very few women with a man that is 10 years or more older than her that are not there for security. I am a RN and I see so many old men hospitalized, married to younger women, and their wives are not there for them. Women marry older men and have a younger man on the side that they are sleeping with and spending that old man’s money on the younger man.
You simply can't speak for most women. In my twenties up until now (50's), I've never looked for "security". There are tons of men who are attracted and open to dating someone 10 years older who aren't looking for security. Generalizations can be harmful too.
Even with all the disclaimers and (not for sensitive women) in tne title. The comment sections shows no matter how much work Tony put in their are women that still wont listen
I truly hope that older (and maybe younger) women will listen and follow your great advice Tony. That will save bitter tears and despair later on. Be SMART ladies!!!
Tony! I'm 40 and constantly get approached by younger men. Thanks for sharing this straight, no chaser message. I needed to hear it. Keep spreading the truth and stay blessed!
Tony you ain't lying! I got with someone that was ten years younger and let me say that i thank God that situationship ended 5 years ago! It was like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. 🙌🏽
Now the only thing I can debate with you on is have u actually taken a look at some of those teenage and 20 something year old ladies… some of them are built up like a bag of laundry and a lot of 40 and up bodies are killing it… I actively stay in the gym to keep things lifted and tight
@@Intentionalwithlelumnope. Not always true. I look physically better than I ever have and I’ve always been in shape. I’m 52. My body is more fit and toned and shapely than 20 & 30 year olds in the gym. No, I’m not delusional. Facts. They admit it too.
@@enlightenedone7083 I hear as well and that may be true for u but for the majority of people that isn’t the case.. I’m 43 my daughters are 21 & 22 and I look damn good but I know their skins youthfulness is not the same as mine and as I stated I look good always told I look like I’m in my 20s by they look like they are in their teens so there is always a difference.. and this is the case for most .. the look may be better but the youthfulness is not there when it comes to that
Yea… we definitely have to stop making assumptions about body parts and age. Some of it has to do with genetics but there are plenty of men and women who look amazing. Everything is tight, everything. If you actually take care of your body and skin AND your genetics are good you will age well. You hear many women say often they feel and look better in their 40s than they did in their 20s. Take the time to actually get to know a person is the best way to start something, but we have to stop making assumptions that women body parts fall apart at 50 or after. We all age it’s just a part of life.
I was with a man 12 years younger than me. He's a wonderful human being. We were together for 2 years. I left because he wanted a Mommy. Handle all his money, pay his bills, and do all related household stuff. Thank God he wasn't crazy and greedy. I will never do it again. You are absolutely right. Honesty hurts sometimes.
Glad you learned from your mistake and shared it on this platform because Tony is definitely telling women how to avoid pitfalls that men has for women who are not thinking. The man don't have to be greedy when it comes to money or crazy but he can have other strategies to play on a woman who is desperate and vulnerable. For instance, he can be sleeping around with other women and bringing stuff back to your bed and you might think he is being honest when he is a far cry from it. Don't be taken for a ride.
Hey Tony, I know more men that cut off their families for women more than the other way around. This goes both ways but I really don’t know a lot of women that discard their families immediate/extended for a man. Men seem more desperate or thirsty for women. Women are accustomed to moving thru life solo with or without men. But I would caution older men & women when dating or getting into relationship with younger ppl. Make sure it is real before we get wrapped up in a man or woman. There are exceptions as you said and thanks for your commentary. Also, realize that women and men are the same ppl they’ve always been, just older and hopefully wiser. The eyes see and like what they like. Attractive is attractive regardless of age but we have to use wisdom in dating. Really everyone regardless of age. There are a lot of ppl playing games out here.
This is A+ correct. The issue is that there is no virtually no one to date once you get passed a certain age and that is just the fact. Im 46 and options are very limited but you cannot be so blind that you play yourself. You have to look out for yourself.
I completely agree. I met a man in his early 40's, I was in my early fifties and this man thought he was going to move into my home, while l would still pay the mortgage, the bills, give him money, sex, wanted to impregnate and trap me (he clearly did not know how biology worked) and allow him to cheat on me. When he found out I was not the one to be played with and I broke it off, he got angry, said I was old and washed up and that he never wanted me anyway. I still get approached by men in their 30's and early 40s, most of these men do not know if they are coming or going and I tell them I am not interested. They will see that I am well put together and somehow think I have the financial means for them to use me. I will now only date men that are aged 50 and older. One who is taking care of his health (not looking for a nurse with a purse), manages his weight and his hygiene, is financially established enough to pay his bills, has his own home and is emotionally and spiritually in tune. I am sure there is an older man that is aged 50 and older that wants to date within his age range and is not about playing games. I know it will take longer to meet him, but I am still hopeful. In the meantime I am being content, enjoying my life, hanging with friends and family and not being desperate.
@@TempermentalTart He was 7 years older and he thought I was old. I looked younger than him and was in a better shape health and otherwise. He was mad he could not use me.
Most men think differently some men will not really care about the body of the lady but how you make him feel, but you are making lots of sense, thanks.
Exactly no brainer… this should be a standard for dating anyone.. older, younger or same age That would be disgusting and a huge turnoff if I man asked for or expected money and/or regular gifts😐😣😠 gross🤮
U c why I make bee line left when younger men approach me… I don’t take any of them seriously cause before they even try it I let them know I’m too old for them and go find someone their age
My husband is 9 years younger and he takes care of me but then again he’s from a different country. He’s more mature than anyone Ive dated in the USA. It’s really bad out here.
Tony, you are doing God’s work. This is confirmation for what I learned the hard way. I married a younger man, 12 years younger who I thought was mature, the sex was great but when his mask fell, it was over. Marriage lasted less than a year.
He breaks her mentally and financially because she allows him to do it. She has no standards and is probably desperate and vulnerable desiring attention that she probably has not had in a very long time. When he gets her confidence and trust fully in him by the fake way he treats her, then he goes after her money taking her all the way to the bank. Useless and waste of her time. Always.
I needed to hear this Tony. I know I look good for my age but younger guys always seem interested in me. It's hard to meet older, attractive, available men!!! Got to get out there more!
She certainly was because her husband asked her more than one time to marry her and she finally accepted. I am glad she finally found love although she was one of the most beautiful women and entertainers. I believe he really loved her and cared about her genuinely.
Bottom line is that 99.9% of older women get played by younger men. This happens because the younger man will give off the illusion that he's genuinely interested in the woman & he see a future with her when in all actuality its a game from jump. He really just want the bragging rights and stability as tony said. Its always exceptions to the rule, but somewhere down the line, you will catch feelings, because, our end goal as women, is to be married with kids and have a husband that loves us unconditionally. The women that get it gets it. Thank you soo much Tony!
Women get played because sometimes they feel very alone and lonely they are also desperate and vulnerable. This is standing on dangerous grounds because a man can sense when a woman is desperate or otherwise and he will take advantage of an older woman especially. She generally has funds most of the time as Tony mentioned and the younger man pretends he wants a relationship with her so he can take her to the bank. I say any woman needs to wake up and see the daylight and know what scammers do and stop allowing them to take you out wine and dine you from your pocketbook and not his. Let him go because he is not worth doing anything with. And yes he may want bragging rights to say he has been with an older woman who is a cougar, but don't let him BRAG on You. It is senseless keep it moving!
The conclusion of the matter after every video is, love yourself and cultivate a relationship with God. No one can run game on you when you are moving through life with God.
Great topic! Coach Tony, I like that you emphasized "PURE & GENUINE". Love the honesty that is hard to ingest. Semantics sends the majority spinning their wheels and lost in translation. Coach you explained yourself thoroughly and expressly. Keep going sir!
I read most of the comments. I think alot of peoples are misunderstanding Tony's point. First of all, I am 60 and is happily married to my Soulmate for 39 years. We both look like we are in our 40s with a young personality. Anywho, Tony is not speaking for EVERY older woman young man relationship. He is basically saying that in MOST cases, when a younger man is dating or pursuing an older woman 10 years or older than him, his motive is a come up. Point, blank, period.
I know what you’re saying is so true. I didn’t know the whole game, but I knew to run every time they approached me. You just filled me all the way in and I’m here for it. Hurt my feelings to help me. Thank you sir.
My opinion .... It takes a mature man that set limits and will date only women his age ( or 5;years younger or older) It's seems most men are attracted to younger women to gratify there sexual desires. What about the inner beauty. ?? I'm putting my trust and faith in God ...... That he will place a nice Christian man in my path. I don't want to be used , manipulated or abused .... Especially. When the older we get....if there's more lies and deception.... It's so much harder to be resilient. And remain faithful. There's men and women that are using one another . It's all very sad. .
@@genovasquez8361 You seem to be everywhere throughout these comments looking for some attention with this rhetoric. A nearly 50 year old man preying on 23 year olds is quite pathetic. As a woman, I can guarantee the only ones to respond to you are those who've been severely damaged and looking for a father figure and/or those who need a sponsor aka sugar daddy.
@@genovasquez8361 That doesn't make sense. Attraction and lust are two different things. Replace lust with the word attraction, then your comment would make sense. If you're lusting straight off the bat then that's a problem. It will never last if you're lusting. Men like you confuse lust with love. It can never be love if lust is the initial feeling.
I believe Tony is a narc. He says he trying to be helpful. But, I think he sending his wife a message. If you older and younger men are attracted to you its not a sin. In the bible when a man died. Someone married his wife Usually wife had a younger man to impregnate and carry on the man who died name.😊 Narcs will take revenge on you. He is a nice covert narc and you ladies dont recognize him. Jesus Christ is Lord.😊
Hello Sir, I am a 56 yr old lady with a 33 & 26 yr old son and daughter. I’ve watched and liked many of your vids… and honestly can’t recall ever commenting. But THIS vid!!! Omg was definitely an eye opener for me! I’ve been out of the dating scene for 15 yrs at least but have considered at least starting with phone convos. Don’t wanna say too much more but I appreciate hearing pointers and value the opinions from real men … thank you and know you are an exceptional, intentional and awesome coach!!!
Hello Tony, Thank you for the truth! It certainly makes sense about not dating over five years younger than your age. I am black and Puerto Rican and look clear/white and I am 68 years old. It is really tough to find a decent man who really loves me for me. I am very patient and waiting and working on me, my brain and my business while I wait. God bless you and your family for all you do to enlighten us. 🙏🏼
Tony is RIGHT... There are SO MANY older LADIES on Tik Tok WARNING younger ladies talking about now they're homeless & living in the car in a whole different state off the strength of a dude!😢
Dang this hurt my heart. But its only confirmation. I got one thats 15 years younger. I never date young because of the maturity level. But this one slid his way in somehow🤷🏾♀️ Its only been a month and God keeps telling me "aht aht this is not the one"😅 😢 and ive been battling with breaking this soul tie because i earnestly know better! Please pray for me...
I just allowed myself to get played by one as well. My intuition told me at the beginning no but I proceeded anyways. I forgive myself for making the mistake or not listening to my intuition and moving on. This video was much needed.
You will see in these comments why men, even good men, have a hard time telling the truth. Because when the truth doesn’t fit our fantasies, we are set on finding out the hard way. I even posed this question to my 16 year old son, and at 16 he knows that a man is not GENUINELY attracted to and desiring a relationship with a woman 10 or more years than him. And that is why I tell women all the time that y’all are falling for grade school games, and assume that because a man tells you he genuinely likes you, he’s telling the truth… and also, there exceptions to the rule, and if it’s an exception, we aren’t discussing that. This is about the majority. But I gotta keep telling the truth for those who are wise enough to hear.
Ughh Tony you were spot on, I'm only 30 but I've been through almost everything you just said. At least, now I know how he got my credit card number. 😫😭
It's game 🎯
I get it, I’ve experienced the nonsense that comes from dealing with a younger man…but honestly it wasn’t much different when the dude was 6 years older (I was 33 at the time). A player or immature man comes in all shapes and sizes…lol. But for real, what are we supposed to do if we’re 40+ ? Should we just give up all together? I’m sick of being single!!
I will stay single before I settle for a old man.
@@ITSCRYSTALRENEE Thats what they told Tina Turner. But she kept it moving.
FYI: You DO NOT have to be an older woman for this to happen to you. Speaking from experience 😓 Keep your eyes open ladies 👀
This is true can happen to any person. I think in the example in the video is accurate but yes at any age as well.
He didn't say you had to be older. I'm not old but the message still applies
💯
Facts the 50 on up just as deceitful
RIGHT!. I had a 401K at 24 yrs old. This is just how men play games in general.
I am 60 and have been told repeatedly that I look 40. Yes, I have dated much younger men and I have to agree with you. The younger man usually has mommy issues or they are looking at your stability. Now, this is how you are going to weed them out. 1. Start talking about how you are looking for a provider and that you are a queen looking for your king. 2. Tell them that you do not loan money or pay for dates. 3.Inform them that you do not believe in shacking because that is reserved for marriage. 4. Communicate to him that you do not let a man drive your car because you don't have another $80,000 to replace it and he is not on your auto insurance policy. Now he is going to continue to talk with you briefly but it won't be long before he realizes that you are dead serious. Next, you will probably get a stupid text telling you that he does't think that the two of you are compatible and or he doesn't feel a connection. Sometimes he may put you in the friend zone so just in case he hits rock bottom, he feels he can ask you for something. Simply tell your playboy that you don't have any room in your life for any new friends. (You can thank me later)
What if you just avoid them altogether, save yourself the time of having to explain yourself, and place your attention to men who more age appropriate?
🎯🔥
Heck I just experienced this yesterday! I'm 63 and he is 69. We "seemed" compatible for a week, but then his true colors began to show. Trying to escalate the talk to a more physical nature. When that was getting him no where he said "I don't think we are compatible and said we could be friends. Now tell me, what kind of "friends" do you think he wanted to be when we are "not compatible " but he wanted something physical? Men think we are stupid or desperate or something. Blocked and deleted!
You betta say that!
Actually, you're allowing way too much! I'm 60 also & look 40 with the younger tighter skin, no stretch marks ever & had two kids! I workout, I have a great body structure, and have always had a flat stomach with small waistline... etc! #1. When approached, I immediately let them know my real age & that I don't entertain men my Sons age 40 & 38. So, even if they are 10-15:years younger than me... NO exceptions! Therefore, there's absolutely no reason to give them my #... PERIOD! 2. If a man can't match what I have or more: his own. House, Car, Career, and Financially stabled, w/ low debt & Good Crefit.... then, there's no conversation to be had! Ladies, always know your Worth & Never Settle! I've never been that woman who would "pray" for a man & I've been married twice!! Both my sons are from the 1st marriage! I've retired from two careers by age 58 & I've been divorced 15yrs! I have 0 tolerance & I WILL NOT settle for "anything" just to say that I have a man! The only debt I have is my mortgage & I own both of my "high brand" model vehicles & don't nobody drive them but ME. And only I have access to my home! I know my worth, I have high standards, and I don't fall for ANYTHING! That said, Tony is correct in everything he's sharing about both men & MOST women! My point: not ALL women are as vulnerable & we do use our commonsense! 😉
There are many younger women who have more mileage than an older women though.
I bet
💯
I agree on this one. There are many women who are older that will run track around ladies my age. A lot of my generation are so toxic and OUT of shape. Flabby youthful and out of shape!
@@genovasquez8361 ....same applies to males on that statement.
Yes...plus alot more tattoos.
Don't let anyone tell you who you should and should not date it's your life. Just be careful at All ages and stay in prayer for your heart protection.
I'm not completely diagreeing with the man (Tony here) but I am going to add my 2 cents in.
It really just boils down to looks, not so much age. If a woman in her early 40s is really attractive, she will receive attention from men in their late 20s and early 30s. If a woman is not good looking in her 20s, men would still pay more attention to that attractive 40 year old if they're both in a room.
Also, be watchful of ALL people you date. Whether they are younger, older, your age. Does NOT matter. There's gold diggers of all ages. Be vigilant period.
You said it best for the women that keep up their youth and appearance
Absolutely correct!
Agree with you. It's not always about the age...
I agree with you about the appearance. I am 35 and i am dating a 21 year old guy. I tried to avoid him but here we are. He always tells me how beautiful and sexy i am. Lol btw i don’t look like my age as an asian woman I usually attract younger guys.
Agree 💯
Im 45 and i agree. This is a terrible age to be single. The older men want 20 and 30 somethings and the younger ones wanna eat good and drive your car.🤦♀
Why are older men so confident that women in their 20s and 30s want them for anything outside of money? I don’t get why their audacity is so high when they are average at best.
I'm 30 and all that applies to me. That's why I dont even bother dating. More of healing from trauma and working on myself.
@@genovasquez8361 you sound like a predator
@@ieshjust16same !!! This the most peaceful I ever felt in my life. Blessings to you on your journey ❤
Unfortunately, most Black American women need the healing bc we get played so much. It doesn't start in our older years. @@ieshjust16
Whether it hurts or not, I don't care. I am with you when you are right.
I wouldn't date a younger man, he's still try to figure out this thing called "life" which leaves him immature, unstable financially and total waste of time, he will end up setting me back in life.
Depends on what you consider younger. A younger man can have all the things you have. A lot of older don’t have much to show for all their years on this earth. There are exceptions to the rule.
These old dudes can and will do the same thing. Age don't equal mature, got his ish together.
Never invest in any man who is not your husband. I don’t care how much he is spending time with you.
Come on now!
This needs to be pinned.
And if this not considered, the Rollercoaster keeps riding.
Great advice because investing in a man not your husband is a huge mistake that you will never unravel so walk about and don't let him take you for your money or for anything else.
💯
I’m not giving any man $$$…,,young or old. Periodt!!!
👏
💯
You ain't never lied!
Periodt!
Or middle-aged, PERIODT!!
I’m sticking to my priciple of never giving a man a nickle. Im okay with buying reasonably priced gifts, but I can’t respect nor entertain a man that needs my dollar.
Exactly.
Preach. A lot of us had to learn the hard way! Thank God for UA-cam
Bravo! You are smart. Stay away from Pimps.
Facts!! 💯
you don't even buy gifts. Nothing. Zero
The same is true on the reverse. Older men are typically only appealing to young women because older men have more money. Young men are much more physically attractive and have more stamina than older men. Most women of all ages (including young women) physically prefer young strong men with good heart health and blood circulation. So this is not surprising to me.
😂 blood circulation
@@muicreativeproductions416😅😅😅😅😅😂😂😂 I'm in tearsssss right now lol
@@genovasquez8361 yeah and you are totally not lying sooo hard right now..😂Brother i am 18. No young woman actually likes muuch older men. Some sellout for money which i would never do. There are also some mentally ill young women that had trauma from their fathers, they have father issues so you probably got with those. No healthy young woman would rather pick a middle aged man over a 27 ye old man
This is true about the woman who wants sex and money.
@bratesta that's why I cringe at these videos...women understand this about young men FOR THE MOST PART. A few lil dollars aint hurting nothing...keeps them from having to play nurse to an old dude.
When I was 22 my bf at the time cheated with an older woman. She was in her late 30s. She got pregnant and he called me to tell me because he didn't want me to find out from other people. Years later now they have moved overseas and have 2 kids. He still checks on me. But some women actually live happy lives with younger guys.
It can happen but likely not…I’m not upset at all about my age. I also believe that if I’m supposed to be with someone I will…if not then that is Gods will
That's terrible.
@@tarag7292 to be honest I got over it so quick. She was financially stable and had a great career. She made a difference in his life so😹 I had to accept defeat. A
😮wow! Sorry that happened
@@shebrownsuga it's 🆗
Ladies know your worth, know your value but most importantly have a relationship with God, no matter what age you are. Be careful who you entertain and always use discernment.
As a 45 year old woman, I can tell you for a fact that when women my age get with much younger (10+ years younger) men, we typically aren't taking it seriously either. As women, we do want love but there are certain periods where it is just for the thrill.
🙄 mid life crisis ay
@@ieshjust16 No, I don't even think it's that. There are women who have been married, divorced, or who are just single, who happen to hook up with a much younger man during a time in their lives when they want to be single. I think it's untrue to assume that these older women are looking at these younger men as potential partners. In fact, that's usually not the case.
@@IK_4 girl did you watch the video or are you just here to argue?
@KJ-yb2wf I guess I have to explain this like would explain it to a child. No, most older women do not want younger men. But when we do, I promise you that it's just for fun. Are you an older woman, or a woman at all? Don't try to challenge me. There is no fantasy about being with much younger men. But when it happens it is NOT something that a woman really wants long term. Period.
@@ieshjust16 You're asking me, yet you're here arguing with me. Why? 🤔 I am also 100% certain that you aren't a woman either.
Im a 39 year old woman without children.... Most men around 50 or 60 want a relationship with me. They make me feel sick. Because they are my mothers age. Some of them have daughters my age. So im going younger.
Yep! That’s what they do! Old ass men don’t want mature women their age. It’s been this way since the dawn of time beloved. Enjoy wanting younger men for now. That’ll change for you as you start getting old-around 45 you’re probably not gonna want a younger man cause they all still cheat and will try and run game. Good luck but I feel you on not wanting the older men-hell I’m 52 and I damn sure don’t want no man in their 60s but I don’t want a younger man either. I guess I’m just assed out at this point.
🤭
Facts! 💯🙌 been there, too!
You do just that "go younger" or stay in your own age range. An older man most of them will go after someone your age because it makes them feel younger and they feel as if they have accomplished something huge to get a young woman. Plus another thing they believe they can control a younger woman since she does not have as much experience as an older woman in many cases. If they make you feel sick as you conveyed, then they are not the ones for you if they have daughters your age which is "sickening."
Girl a 50 yr old is not your parents age. They only 10 yrs older than you.
This applies to all age groups… anyone can get scammed
So basically the older you get no one wants you because the men your age are seeking younger women and the younger men are also seeking the same so basically women are only looked at from a fleshly point of view no matter what else she has to offer...you're only worthy if you are considered "fresh" i.e you're young, even when you're young and have the so called "mileage" 😂...Eish how sad all this vanity is. Coz the sad reality is, everybody is going to get old.
Well, when I think about it; nowadays many young women have more mileage than some older women because of how relationships are today; multiple men, multiple kids by the age of 30, a woman can be washed up. Not all older women slept around like that.
I think men as they grow older and see younger men looking at their wives-turn to strategy. So they say, "Lets make it clear that noboby wants old ladies. " You might be listening to a narc and dont know it. Beware, narcs will look so innocent while killing your self confident and esteem at the same time. Ladies dont swallow abuse. Remember in the bible Sarah was 90 and the men wanted her. Watch out for narcs.😮
I have always wondered what happens when an old man who chooses a 20-something has a heart attack. I wonder how long their "trophy" will stick around.
@@joylindadichamounix Ikr. Or if they have PED 🤣
So those are the same thoughts I had while listening to his commentary
I am in healthcare. Women are now faced with men *****50 plus with all of their health issues (high blood pressure/diabetes/gout/depression/obesity). Some Women are dating younger.
Exactly! U know I’m just tired of men putting such emphasis on a woman’s age, body and financial status but meanwhile young and old they are literally a damn mess!! Why are women so subjected to this at all cost??
Agreed with your comment 100%
I would say 5 years is plenty of years a man can be older more than 6-10 years I have a problem.
@kimkitty3914 Not saying that a 6-10 year gap relationship won't work but I think ppl are more compatible in a 5 year old radius. They usually lived in an Era of time of historical events of culture, music, economics, fashion, upbringing etc.
I'm approached by men 15 to 30 years younger than me, not any my age.😂 I always dress modestly!
I already know what you’re going to say, because I lived through it. I had an honest relationship with authentic attraction with a younger man for three years. It did not last because it was not feasible. Our differences in maturity were not readily observable in the first six months. But as we were living together for nearly 3 years those quiet parts became louder. Things that he was still fascinated with I had already experienced, and had no more interest in. And it couldn’t be any other way, because he did not have the time on this earth to learn the things that I took for granted. however, he healed my heart from a lot of trauma and pain, and I will forever be grateful to him for that. When we separated, I was more Whole than I had ever been in my life, and I have continued to grow and prosper ever since. That was three years ago now and I am still happily single. I have never been so content and happy in my life. I think I owe a lot of that to the innocent form of love he willingly gave me.
Understood 😂
I understand. My guy pursued me for fun & physical intimacy. We both went forward, eyes open. It was grand & glorious. It was a relationship of respect. I was myself for the first time ever,,I didn't give up myself to please a man..I liked me & he liked me. I'm grateful to him. It all depends on the individuals as you can't make general statements for the masses. No regrets.
That's so beautiful!! Your greatitude and trust restored . Those 3 years sounds as if there was healing . Past 3 years I've needed time to heal. Not even interested in dating or desiring being in a relationship. I'm greatful for peace and quiet. Focusing on my health and the Lord . That's where my healing comes from . No more treating a man like he's God. Enjoying peace 🕊️ and solitude.
Thank you for this comment! It was much needed.
Younger men are starting to see how valuable PEACE is over looks and age.
THANK YOU FOR TRUTH!!!! The only thing I want to add is beware of the ones who will also marry you to cover up their deception, if they realize how desperate you are for marriage. If they don’t care about, lying, manipulating, and using you, then they definitely won’t care about insincere marriage promises. I am 52 with 3 grown children and 2 grandchildren and I learned this today from you, just now. He not only stayed “down on his luck” as he called it, but he tried to get half of everything in the divorce, including my 401 and assets. He even tried to get alimony. Thankfully he opened his mouth during a rant and said, “I don’t want anything from her”, and the judge didn’t allow him to change it. Please ladies listen intently to what this man is saying to you. I did and I’m forever grateful for the many ways that God is healing me. You sir are serving God and serving people….thank you.
Thank goodness! You really dodged a bullet 😯
I'm also greatful to hear truth spoken. I believe he's very compassionate and realizes womans needs and our vulnerability as a middle aged or older woman. When we believe it's love then it's so sad how we can be blindsided and or see the red flags. He's seen the aftereffects of women being abandoned and betrayed. It's really hard to trust again and be used again. If there's. Less manipulation and lies with dating a man a little older or younger, or exactly. Our age ..... Then why not set a boundary to lesson the chance of abuse , manipulation , liee, to occur as we are aging. I never get caught up in you look.decades younger. I desire a man to respect and look at my inner beauty more so then my appearance or turning myself into a pretzel 🥨 in bed . I'm ok with intimacy and not sex. Romance, not lust. Respect not disrespect. An honest man with similar values that I hold and not a player or untrustworthy man. Be wise out there. Be careful. Trust your intuition. Thank you for this message , . It was confirmation.
In terms of "mileage", many younger females have had way more sexual partners than alot of older women. The young ones are wild n out busy acting like City Girls. SMH
Yup but men like younger women period 🤷🏾♀️
@@thelmathomas9399 Pandering? Ain't my fault that's what they like 🤷🏾♀️
@@thelmathomas9399 doesn't matter how ran through a younger woman is, she still will be chosen first. Harsh truth.
@@thelmathomas9399
Men like younger women
I know I was more attractive when I was 25 v 35
At 25 i had men of all races looking at me
In the modeling industry a woman nearing 30 is nearing the end of her career
We didn't make the rules
Nature did
Yes men like younger women but they brainwash themselves when they fall in love with n older woman.
This might have hurt my feelings if I hadn't already discovered this truth on my own. Once upon a time, when I dated much younger men, what saved me from ruin was a philosophy that I have always lived by: I don't give men money. I agree with 99% of what you said.
Like you said, some women will not listen. I know a woman in her late 60s who moved across the world to be with a man less than half her age. She works 3 jobs to finance his lifestyle which, I'm pretty sure includes a wife and children since he's Muslim. He told her he was married to another woman to get German citizenship, which he claimed she demanded $10K for. That, my friend, was the first setup to get in her purse.
The best antidote to being scammed by a man, younger or otherwise, is to love yourself so fiercely that you're willing to see and accept the truth. Just don't adopt his lies as your own. Remember, he's a party...not a partner. And don't give him money and he'll soon leave.
Even if you don't give him money he'll keep pushing. Annoying smh I think I said too much 😂
your friend knows whats up- she wants the adventure
And otherwise. Yes. Because they are your age doesn't mean you vet them out either.
Truth❤
Great advice
I’m 40 and I look BETTER than I did in my 20s. I look younger than my boyfriend who is 30?!? The exception. He’s leading & had everything before we met -I’m not in this man’s way lol
Same! I’m 46 and look better than I did in my 20s and 30s. 🤗
@@natasha2877 me am 48yrs he is 37yrs
Wow that’s true, I look so young for my age and I feel young as well and I’m more sexually active than my younger partner. How about that he acts like a old man he wants it once a month😂
Same here! I’m in my 40’s and run circles physically and mentally around 20 year old men (and women). I get approached all the time by guys of all ages but I agree with what Tony says. FACTS. A man’s got to have sense in every category, be able to communicate properly, be genuine, be stable in every category, and not be looking for a mommy AT ANY AGE. And it sure does help if he can get it up still…
@@sandramatthew931 😂😂😂😂😂😂 OMG! I'm falling on the floor right now.
This is Not true for all. There are many of us that look real good for our age, skin also beautiful. Halle & Jennifer both struggle real hard throughout the decades with their relationships -young or older men. There are so many in relationships 7-12 gap that's healthy. Alike, there are a tremendous amount of garbage relationships. What I'm saying is a lot of us are the Exception. My relationship is 3 yrs strong and we are an 10yr gap and engaged. Yes, he didn't know my exact age for the 1st year, but by then he told me he loved me and never wants this love to end. We've been engaged now for 9 months. Sometimes it turns out well. He is 39 & takes me out still, surprises me with gifts still, dances with me, fills my vehicle up still, vacations still, pays for everything still with the exception of me tipping at dinner or me saying hold on, let me pay for your haircut this time.
Don't be disillusioned. He never said the exceptionally (genetically blessed) ones have better relationships. He said that men are not generally sexually attracted to most women older than 4o. I am 51, in fantastic shape, blessed with body, skin, face etc and the men keep calling....but guess what, Tony is still spewing FACTS!!!!!!
Honestly, in this day and age, finding a marriage minded man who is worth marrying is something to celebrate 💐 congratulations! I've been watching for a year and I think while this is all good info, it's not gonna cover everything that's out there. And that's ok; the goal is to increase the likelihood of finding a good man with this knowledge. Tony keeps me equipped with the right tools to keep on keeping on.
I would still be cautious until you are actually married! I mean if you’re sleeping together, you’re living in sin. That means God’s not running, so the enemy can blow it up at any moment!
Thanks ... do you gal women tis women that ...
Yall, be missing the part of the exception to the rule
My oldest brother & wife just celebrated their 25th wedding Anniversary he is younger 49 she is 58 they have 2 children out Of high school she works from home & he works as a supervisor at a medical company there home is almost paid off they have 3 cars several dogs etc a family man he is not into any outside mess he always on the job and in the yard lord lol... they have done wonderfully together over the yrs it works for some not all..myself never been in a relationship with a man no more than 5 to 6 yrs older I am 47 my son n daughter are out on their on I'm loving my singlenes celibate until I remarry divorced in 2008 ...decided not 2 date anymore too games because I know what I desire been their done that ...great info Tony👍💜
Excellent message! Unfortunately I know of a few women who have fallen victim to these games played by younger men. Heartbreaking because the women had genuine feelings for the men. So cruel.
There are older men who are scamming too 🤷🏽♀️
That's sad, these women are genuine and being used.
Tony putting disclaimers and ‘viewer discretion warnings’ is hilarious!! Tony said don’t come for him. 😩😩😩
This is cracking me up lolol
Right. He knows he did some reaching with this one. Still love lil bruh tho😅😅😅😅😅
Why women are still listening to men tell them who and what they are is beyond me. Love yourself, keep your body healthy and fit, and continuously invest in yourself and then allow a man that is vibrating on the same frequency to pursue you….everything else is just noise designed to destroy your self esteem
Thank you for this comment!
@soulmood7777 thank you, cause everyone on UA-cam seems to be an expert, Love ya self folks
@@sandiburwell878exactly
I'm 63 & established. Happily single don't even care to date. People think I'm in my 40's I have a 37 year old guy hitting on me, I mean chasing hard Lol I explained to him that 63 & 37 is BAT CRAP CRAZY & every woman that crosses his path is not meant to be a love connection. There is no way I believe he has any good intentions for me, but I have continued great plans for me & he will not be allowed to steer me off course.
Hang out, have fun, just keep the "goodies" to yourself. He can only take what you give him
@@crystalclear7550 LOL I'm not mistreating him or anything but he's gonna get that he's met someone that knows about 🐱 management😂
By the grace of God. I am 60 and get hit on daily by younger men. I giggle to myself and move on down the road. Get a closer relationship with Jesus and God will bless you. Jesus Christ is Lord.😊
You are absolutely right! That 37 year old has NO good intentions for you because you could be his mom and why would he want that. He is no doubt looking for something that you have and thereafter he will share it and use it on another woman who will be "younger." You are right don't waste your time and he needs to keep on tracking but in another direction.
Bad company destroys good character, 1Cor 15:33
I am 62 yrs old and I have dated men 10yrs younger. It's not the age of a person, it's the level of maturity. Some men my age r still immature. I don't date a lot for certain reasons. I am comfortable in my own skin and don't mind being alone. I am stable but so r the younger men that I have dated. So no one has the right to judge another based on age. Think about it. No one is perfect. Everyone is looking for something. R we equally yoked or does one have more to offer than the other? Can we compromise? There r many facts to be considered in a relationship. As long as the 2 ppl involved can come to an amicable agreement, the matter of public opinion carries no weight.
Denial
I certainly understand because I am older than you are and look younger than I am people tell me. I do think that I am aging gracefully thank God. Anyway, Tony is right you can look great and younger, but the body is aging and is not the same as when we were younger; that comes with age. I also believe that older women must be very careful and understand what a younger man is actually looking for which is usually a place to stay, a car to drive, and whatever funds you might have in your account can attract a younger guy who means no good for an older woman. Many times he is playing games and is a player most of the time. Also, he will use the older woman to get the money he needs while he is going behind her back spending it on a younger woman with "your money." Of course, there are exceptions to the rule we know that there are some genuine men who truly love older women and they feel more comfortable with older women in lieu of his own age. I have met young men believe it or not from 27 to 40's which is ridiculous! I do not meet too many men my own age. I really believe something is wrong with the younger men who go after older women and I sense they have a real problem and need to seek professional help and especially go to God and ask him to help them make better decisions as to who they need to choose. I doubt that women who are cougars are in the mix for a guy who is way too young for her is interested in her for real.
Apt!❤
My advice: Just don't do it; once you learn of his age, don't get involved. The time wasted could be time spent on improving yourself and attracting a man in your age group.
Young whipper snapper, and "HE GONE BREAK YOUR BACK!"😂😂 I'm weak...First time watching you and I just subscribed to your channel.☺️🩷
Thanks so much for this Tony! Although I look much younger than 57 and divorced, I realize my time has passed. Its time I focus on my purpose in life and live for God!
Hello!!! 👍🏽
I don't necessarily agree with you. Don't give up on yourself.
That's ridiculous. Women will ALWAYS be sought after as long as they take care if their health and try to look their best. My grandmother is in her 80s and she still dresses up, is chic and takes care if herself.
@@beverleyreid7572 She is a married woman. Is best to live for God and avoid getting into sin. That is not giving up on yourself.
My man is 30, mature and has his life together. I am 50 something. We have a genuine connection and love and we have no issues. He has his money and I have mine. He’s not benefiting from me financially any more than I benefit from him. We’re equal. Only difference is in have more life experience. We work against all odds but we work. We’re happy and moving forward. One day it will end but it would be the same if he were my same age. We thoroughly enjoy our time together, love on each other and that’s it.
When the manisphere speaks of older women they mean women 27 and older lol
That's because they're stuck still persuing the girls who rejected them when they were younger...
Right but they are still young at 50 with a dad bod 😂
@@la6136 🤣 for real
@@genovasquez8361 they're all predators
Yup it’s so sexist! When I was 30 people thought I was 18! I’m 43 now and aging very well and I see tons of women my age and older that are absolutely stunning!!! I hear it all the time younger men love older woman and not just to use them for money. This younger generation of women a lot of them don’t follow old fashioned ways and sleep around and a lot of younger men want us older women because we are old fashioned and more into one on one commitment. A lot of young men wish they could have a beautiful old fashioned woman!
I listened to this two to three times and agreed with every word. I am 62 years and an attractive woman, but I have that much sense that I am getting older.
Women generally and men fight the time clock because the clock doesn't go backwards, and what we once was, we are not anymore. Period
Now you can good genes, but the clock still goes forward. And if you are blessed in that area, you are blessed but still getting older while being blessed.
I have been approached by men ten years or more, and Mr. Gaskins is correct. You are really not the exception to the rule. You are a notch or something else to fill a need or motive, but not the exception.
If you do not allow God to temper you and give you wisdom about men, life, yourself and the game, you will have your head up in a cloud thinking "oooooo, I got it like that."
And you may have it like that , but the reality is "why do they want someone with a decade difference in age?"
After going through a hard fall with it and learning the lesson, you hear me, I choose to learn the lesson rather repeating it, God's wisdom will show you Truth and you have to choose Truth.
And when I am approached now, God always leads me back to sound teaching on the subject of relationships and uses Mr. Gaskin is one of the voices.
Ladies, ask God to place someone in your life that He can trust because He cares about you being duped and gamed.
It may be hard because waiting for someone, but it will be worth the wait while keeping your peace and purse.
Well said my Queen. Nothing but the truth spoken. Tony is blunt with it but that it is what is needed!
Glory Be To God Most High 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
Thank You For Sharing This Statement 😉👍🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼
Wow... That was amazing what you've written!!! You made me cry a needed cry... I felt every word. Thank you for sharing and being so real and honest. I am sorry for all you've had to endure I don't know you but I feel as if you are a Very Beautiful Spirit & Human!!! I wish you only happiness,healing & peace. Again thank you for what you've written. God Bless 🙏
While I agree with everything you said from a broader perspective, I do think there are some younger men who are starting to look at women differently. I've had conversations with younger guys about why they are attracted to older women and the main thing say is that they prefer dating older women because younger women are too much drama. When I think about it, I can understand why they say that. A lot of these younger females are a flat-out hot mess! Their morals, values and lack of integrity leave a lot to be desired in a lot of cases. While a lot of men's behavior is driven by their primal instincts, on a certain level they also want to be with a woman that they perceive as having value. Value in the sense that she is of higher quality in terms of the content of her character. I don't know any man who wants to be with a woman he doesn't trust or have any respect for. They also want to be with a woman who has qualities that they feel will bring out the best in them. A lot of times younger guys see qualities in older women that they just don't find in younger women. It's not necessarily that they have mommy issue, they just don't want to invest their time and energy in younger women because they find the qualities they see in them to be unattractive. Older women, for the most part, tend to conduct themselves in a much more sophisticate way. They tend to be much more self-confident and self-assured, which are extraordinarily attractive qualities, so from that perspective the attraction makes sense.
PREACH QUEEN PREACH ..JUST KEEP PURSE 👛 CLOSE CARD HOME IN SAFE CARRY CASH AND SHARE BANKING ,CAR..HOME..KEYS WITH NO ONE A LOT OF TONY KNOWLEDGE IS TRUE ..HOWEVER QUEEN YOU ON POINT OMGOODNESS PLEASE DROP YOUR MIC .YOU SERVED THIS TRUTH STREIGHT WITH NO CHASER. I LOVE THIS .BLESS YOU AND ALL QUEENS ON EARTH OF ALL AGES .PROTECT THAT HEART AND THAT GIFT BUT ALONE THE CORRECT ONE IN .GOD WILL SEND HE WILL REALLY SEND TO YOU .GOOD COMES TO THOSE WHO WAIT 😘
Most younger men don’t even care if you’re “sophisticated” or not. They want whatever will benefit them in anyway they’re craving at that time😭, they’ll say younger women are too much drama simply because they have self respect & won’t value them as much or believe their lies the way a desperate, older woman would. And this is not for ALL but it’s a truth that I’ve witnessed more than a few times.
I agree. I don’t really look my age 68 and men are attracted to me as young as 35. I have 6 grown male kids. Had the oldest one when I was young so he is 51. So no way I’m dating a man younger or same age as my sons. Dating younger is not my cup of tea. I’m not that girl who is gonna show up with a 51 yr old bf just not. I’m fully mature and know what boundaries to set in my life.
I sure like what you said makes lots of sense.🎉
My much younger fiance and I are planning to get married we'll see how it goes.🎉❤
@@M2NT4just cuz you're older does not mean you're desperate.😅
Well at 63 I dont want a 73 plus year old man either so we ALL are screwed because in our society EVERYONE wants youth and yet we ALL are getting older by the day.
Where is that society girl
Now what he said about older women having more mileage on them and then wanting younger for that reason! This is an ignorant assumption.. some women haven’t been run thru or with a bunch of men.
This message is completely believable to me because younger women are not genuinely sexually attracted to older men either. Both the younger men and the younger women are genuinely attracted to the pocketbook and the wallet.😂
I think younger men are genuinely interested in sexual encounters with an older woman because in many cases she could be more experienced and he wants to experience her due to that. Also, as Tony mentioned he wants a Knot in his belt to say he has been with the older woman and she thinks that she has gotten her groove back as he conveyed as well. Good advice and video! Yes, they are after the pocketbook most of the time because there are a lot of scammers out there and women do need to protect herself. Never ever give a man any money whatsoever unless you are married and he has something to bring to the table just like you have. Don't let that young man make a fool out of you; it is senseless! Don't let him take you to the bank and use your money on a young woman or to satisfy himself in other ways.
looooooooooooooool exactly!!! I agree 100% with everything he said, and you can just replace the "older woman" with "older man" and the "young man" with "younger woman" and everything will still fit PERFECTLY! LOOOOOOLLL Just wait for an older man to stop paying things for his beuatiful younger wife to see what happens! LOOOOOLLL I am, as a woman, NOT HURT AT ALL by his words, he only said the truth.
Some are the older ones are scamming and playing games. I’m not helping a man no matter the age, you not living with me, you not driving my car, I’m not giving a man a damn thing 🤷🏽♀️
They should at least be on their own in the first place however women are never financially invested in a man and if they are that man should be worth it like I helped make money in stocks, fix cars, and promoted her business to make more. Not all men are takers
@@ThePhillyDream true
Thanks for the words of wisdom. As a divorced ,older woman who wouldn't mind being in a healthy relationship with a man someday, I never even considered a younger man. After seeing this video, I appreciate your advise. As a believer, I want God's best,not what satisfies my flesh. Discernment is key! Thanks again. Love this message❤
Yasssss I'm with that! I also prefer older men, even though younger men approach. I'm flattered but DEFINITELY NOT INTERESTED
Yes Glory Be To God Most High 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼☺️☺️☺️🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼
Amen 🙏
Men scam younger women as well.
I’d never trust a younger man’s intentions towards me no matter how good I looked. There are too many younger women who also look good. There’s a reason they’re not going that route. 🤔
Genuinely attracted to and serious about having a forever relationship with are drastically different things.
IKR....I dated a man 6yrs younger than me....we married.....it was the worse thing I ever went thru....thats whn I was introduced to therapy 😢....thank God for deliverance 🙏
I’ve had multiple younger men approach me over the past 15 years and I have asked them why they want to date older females and one of the main reasons they told me is because a lot of these younger women sleep around heavily, I’m taking about 20 year old women have slept with 15-20 or more men! I’m 43 and that’s more than I been with in my life, a lot of younger men are attracted to older women for good reasons and they don’t care if a women has a few wrinkles or gray hair and besides there are people in their 20s and 30s that have wrinkles, over weight, have cellulite and gray hair! Age is just a number. I don’t see the big deal of someone dating a man 5-15 years younger when men date girls young enough to be their daughter or granddaughter!
These younger women, as well as women my age, are so blessed to have you pouring such wisdom into our lives. I am 68 years of age with discernment from God, and I can say that you are teaching nothing but the TRUTH!! It might be tight, but it’s right!! Blessings to you and your family, Tony. THANK YOU!!
Lisa from what I see by your profile pic you look great!!!!! 💕💕💕💯💯💯
I'm in agreement with you , Lisa. Blessings. Gift of discernment is a gift!!
@@kimmathe6701 yes it is!!! Blessings!!
I also have dated and married boys 10yrs younger, big mistake, they had mommy issues and were abusive, I had 3 kids but took good care of myself but was not totally committed to God and was led stray like a dog thank God I got out alive... I'm single and loving it, totally committed to God..keep telling the truth Tony! We as women are blinded by sex...
I am 53 & was living with a 37yr old last year. He was dead broke & I offered to help & paid for everything BUT I loved it. You know why? POWER. Now I understand what its like to be the main provider & understand why a man who pays for everything "plays" with everything. So just be mindful of this. Keep your financial independence & never put all your eggs in one basket as relationships only seem to last these days btw 5-7yrs. Live your best life. Would I do it again & pay for everything? Never. I wanted to see what it was like & I have no regrets.
Younger women only want men 10 to 20 years older for security, and daddy issues. So truly this message applies to older men and women. You are most definitely speaking the truth, receive this message ladies and you're getting it for free.
I can agree with this for many cases. In my 20s I never wanted a guy in his 30s or 40s. Just someone in my own age group.
That made me feel more comfortable.
@@genovasquez8361 you just explained it at the end… You must be fine! 🤣…. I liked older men in my late teens. Very short lived. I grew up with athletes, coaches etc. After that I just wasn’t comfortable with liking someone 10 years my junior or 10 years my senior.
Security is important to every woman! Trust and believe, even women, who were born and raised in nuclear families and who do Not have "daddy issues, want security. Nothing New!
This reminds me of that movie “A Fall from Grace.” The man swooped in and played this older woman and destroyed her livelihood. Excellent take as always Tony.
I appreciate this guidance Tony. I’m 44 and definitely need a man’s perspective on this topic. Always appreciate your raw honesty and we definitely as woman need to be open to that unfiltered conversation. Thank you again.
Ive been a fan for a while but I didnt know exactly how honest you are until this video. Wish I wouldve seen it a long time ago! What you described these younger men will do & how far they will in fact go, happened to me, everything you said including the encouragement of his younger ex the whole time, was true! Took me for a 4yr run im still shocked about! He almost ruined my entire life for pure entertainment that him & his ex in the end, got back together to laugh in my face. Got played more than I couldve ever imagined was humanly possible and it was pure evil/hateful. Im 46now, multiple kids, and no matter what I try to do, men are definitely not interested anymore! Before that guy I was on the best track of my life for an older single mom, was good & looked good. I wasted it on the first younger, fast talking, player I had ever met. Thank you for doing this video, it was all true & it does happen.
Don't even triiiipp BooMa! We're still here and loved by the most High. Let's lean more on GOD and His guidance of our steps!
That separation and the harsh circumstances that push us away hurt, but GOD
I'm happy for You. We gotta be so happy about the truth being revealed! Whheeww..GOD ain't no joke. It's like HE says not My Daughter...
It happened. We expect People to be genuine. Let all the embarrassment etc etc!
I thank GOD that He ripped You from the foolishness You didn't see. YEESS You saved Your Babies from a future wolf! 🙌
Yeesssss You're free to be still with You/GOD. Let's all promise to embrace our solitude, pour into our own hearts, and focus on all the promises GOD has surrounded us with.
Single, unbothered, and at peace.
This happens with men of any age.
I wasn't blessed to have a father or other male relatives to teach me these kind of things about men. I thank God for the work Tony does.
Tony spoke all facts, it's like he's been spying on me wow. He's gifted.
Very greatful. Wish I knew this inf. when I was in my 2Os and 30 and add on 2 more decades after that. 😢😮😂. Im the oldest of 4 sisters and the youngest was my brother. Had know idea how the game worked. Some of us go through hell and back again. I'm greatful to live my life in peace and feel complete being single. Enjoying my life more being single then being in a toxic relationship.
Tony gives good advice and I believe if you go to the Lord in prayer and ask him to guide you, the Lord will do just that. He will never fail you but wants the very best for you as you encounter men in your life. Just don't be vulnerable and desperate since men can pick that up quickly. Let me tell you a quick story, "A gentleman told me that women would come out of the store after shopping and flirt with him while he was sitting in the car to take people home from a livery service. He mentioned that he was not interested in them because they were pursuing him instead he noticed that the lady who did not do that caused him to be interested in her. After he got to talk to her, he asked for her phone number and the rest is history. They later got married and have a baby girl. He said he is so happy how things worked out and could not wait to get off work to go home and enjoy his little daughter and his wife!" That is a short story which is reality. So, wait on God to send you who He wants you to have at the right time if marriage is what you desire. Take care and be blessed.
This is right on time for me because a lot of younger guys are hitting on me since I have turned 41. I don't take it seriously, nor do I entertain it. I look at them side ways 👀 because we have absolutely nothing in common. Thank you for confirming my intuition about what is really going on. I appreciate your honesty 💯 Be blessed 🙏🏾
As a woman in my mid-40s, I am so happy that you are addressing this topic, Mr. Gaskins. You are confirming what I know to be true. I ask God to continue to sharpen my discernment and maintain my peace. I rather be told what I NEED to hear as opposed to what I WANT to hear. This message is helping me in my healing process.
Tyler Perry's movie A Fall from Grace depicted this message Tony is speaking on. Grace's younger husband pull the bait and switch.
I’m seeing women my age getting played by men our age. Let alone a young one.
A woman is played because she let her guards down and became vulnerable and desperate most of the time. Sometimes people do things out of loneliness. Don't do that.
I agree age matters. A man that’s 10 years younger than a woman is looking for security. It’s the same with a woman that’s 10 years younger than a man she wants security, too. The reason it doesn’t look that bad for a man to be a cake daddy to a woman is because men are looked at as providers. I am 43 and I want to date a man that’s 50-55 for security. I want love too, but finances matter.
🎯
@@genovasquez8361 if she is 10 years younger than you, she is in no rush. She will take the time to wait you out. You will eventually spend money. Women are smart. It’s very few women with a man that is 10 years or more older than her that are not there for security. I am a RN and I see so many old men hospitalized, married to younger women, and their wives are not there for them. Women marry older men and have a younger man on the side that they are sleeping with and spending that old man’s money on the younger man.
You simply can't speak for most women. In my twenties up until now (50's), I've never looked for "security". There are tons of men who are attracted and open to dating someone 10 years older who aren't looking for security. Generalizations can be harmful too.
Even with all the disclaimers and (not for sensitive women) in tne title. The comment sections shows no matter how much work Tony put in their are women that still wont listen
😆
I truly hope that older (and maybe younger) women will listen and follow your great advice Tony. That will save bitter tears and despair later on. Be SMART ladies!!!
Tony! I'm 40 and constantly get approached by younger men. Thanks for sharing this straight, no chaser message. I needed to hear it. Keep spreading the truth and stay blessed!
Tony you ain't lying! I got with someone that was ten years younger and let me say that i thank God that situationship ended 5 years ago! It was like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. 🙌🏽
Thank you, Tony, for your professionalism, care, and sincerity about what you do.
Now the only thing I can debate with you on is have u actually taken a look at some of those teenage and 20 something year old ladies… some of them are built up like a bag of laundry and a lot of 40 and up bodies are killing it… I actively stay in the gym to keep things lifted and tight
That elasticity still ain’t the same.. I hear u tho but there is a difference
@@Intentionalwithlelumnope. Not always true.
I look physically better than I ever have and I’ve always been in shape. I’m 52. My body is more fit and toned and shapely than 20 & 30 year olds in the gym. No, I’m not delusional. Facts. They admit it too.
@@enlightenedone7083 I hear as well and that may be true for u but for the majority of people that isn’t the case.. I’m 43 my daughters are 21 & 22 and I look damn good but I know their skins youthfulness is not the same as mine and as I stated I look good always told I look like I’m in my 20s by they look like they are in their teens so there is always a difference.. and this is the case for most .. the look may be better but the youthfulness is not there when it comes to that
@@Intentionalwithlelum I know what you mean. I’m almost 42 and my skin is not the same anymore even with fitness. But each person is different built
Yea… we definitely have to stop making assumptions about body parts and age. Some of it has to do with genetics but there are plenty of men and women who look amazing. Everything is tight, everything. If you actually take care of your body and skin AND your genetics are good you will age well. You hear many women say often they feel and look better in their 40s than they did in their 20s.
Take the time to actually get to know a person is the best way to start something, but we have to stop making assumptions that women body parts fall apart at 50 or after.
We all age it’s just a part of life.
I was with a man 12 years younger than me. He's a wonderful human being. We were together for 2 years. I left because he wanted a Mommy. Handle all his money, pay his bills, and do all related household stuff. Thank God he wasn't crazy and greedy. I will never do it again. You are absolutely right. Honesty hurts sometimes.
Glad you learned from your mistake and shared it on this platform because Tony is definitely telling women how to avoid pitfalls that men has for women who are not thinking. The man don't have to be greedy when it comes to money or crazy but he can have other strategies to play on a woman who is desperate and vulnerable. For instance, he can be sleeping around with other women and bringing stuff back to your bed and you might think he is being honest when he is a far cry from it. Don't be taken for a ride.
Hey Tony, I know more men that cut off their families for women more than the other way around. This goes both ways but I really don’t know a lot of women that discard their families immediate/extended for a man. Men seem more desperate or thirsty for women. Women are accustomed to moving thru life solo with or without men. But I would caution older men & women when dating or getting into relationship with younger ppl. Make sure it is real before we get wrapped up in a man or woman. There are exceptions as you said and thanks for your commentary. Also, realize that women and men are the same ppl they’ve always been, just older and hopefully wiser. The eyes see and like what they like. Attractive is attractive regardless of age but we have to use wisdom in dating. Really everyone regardless of age. There are a lot of ppl playing games out here.
This is A+ correct. The issue is that there is no virtually no one to date once you get passed a certain age and that is just the fact. Im 46 and options are very limited but you cannot be so blind that you play yourself. You have to look out for yourself.
This is what we say with these young girls going for older men...
Exactly!
It reflects mommy/daddy issues regardless of gender for sure
Yet many of these old men cheat on or mistreat their much younger wife. Its better a man loves your soul more than your age or looks.
I completely agree. I met a man in his early 40's, I was in my early fifties and this man thought he was going to move into my home, while l would still pay the mortgage, the bills, give him money, sex, wanted to impregnate and trap me (he clearly did not know how biology worked) and allow him to cheat on me. When he found out I was not the one to be played with and I broke it off, he got angry, said I was old and washed up and that he never wanted me anyway.
I still get approached by men in their 30's and early 40s, most of these men do not know if they are coming or going and I tell them I am not interested. They will see that I am well put together and somehow think I have the financial means for them to use me. I will now only date men that are aged 50 and older. One who is taking care of his health (not looking for a nurse with a purse), manages his weight and his hygiene, is financially established enough to pay his bills, has his own home and is emotionally and spiritually in tune.
I am sure there is an older man that is aged 50 and older that wants to date within his age range and is not about playing games. I know it will take longer to meet him, but I am still hopeful. In the meantime I am being content, enjoying my life, hanging with friends and family and not being desperate.
Ma’am he was just a lazy manipulative jerk. Y’all were in the same age group.
A man in his mid 40’s and a woman in late 40’s are in the same age group. A difference of 4 years?
@@KFontLab He was about 42 years old and I was 49 years old.
@@TempermentalTart He was 7 years older and he thought I was old. I looked younger than him and was in a better shape health and otherwise. He was mad he could not use me.
@miss5564 you articulated that very clearly.. thank you.
Most men think differently some men will not really care about the body of the lady but how you make him feel, but you are making lots of sense, thanks.
Most older woman don't want older men. Older men are worn out and lonely and they want someone to talk to or just to help them in the house
How to debunk this: Don’t give him ANYTHING. If he genuinely likes you, he’ll stay. If he doesn’t, he’ll leave.
True. He's leaving though.
Exactly no brainer… this should be a standard for dating anyone.. older, younger or same age
That would be disgusting and a huge turnoff if I man asked for or expected money and/or regular gifts😐😣😠 gross🤮
U c why I make bee line left when younger men approach me… I don’t take any of them seriously cause before they even try it I let them know I’m too old for them and go find someone their age
I make B-line from older men because they assume I’m in my 20s and I’m young and dumb.
My husband is 9 years younger and he takes care of me but then again he’s from a different country. He’s more mature than anyone Ive dated in the USA. It’s really bad out here.
Tony, you are doing God’s work. This is confirmation for what I learned the hard way. I married a younger man, 12 years younger who I thought was mature, the sex was great but when his mask fell, it was over. Marriage lasted less than a year.
I've been through it too, I'm only 30 but Tony read my life for the last couple years 😭
That could have happened with an older man too
Was it his age or was he just a jerk? I know men that cheat on younger women as well.
@@dawn2205 It was the age gap, different stages in life and expectations on both of our parts that could not be bridged. Love does not conquer all.
You know how it goes. I'm 63, and have seen this happen to lots of women, and still see this happening. He brake her mentally an financially. 😢
Older women. Having a man is not that important enough to give up money or your precious time.
He breaks her mentally and financially because she allows him to do it. She has no standards and is probably desperate and vulnerable desiring attention that she probably has not had in a very long time. When he gets her confidence and trust fully in him by the fake way he treats her, then he goes after her money taking her all the way to the bank. Useless and waste of her time. Always.
Not all men are like that some have true love
Tony much appreciation for your ministry because you're extending, encouragement, wisdom, & safeguards.
I needed to hear this Tony. I know I look good for my age but younger guys always seem interested in me. It's hard to meet older, attractive, available men!!! Got to get out there more!
Men slightly younger and slightly older are too old for me. Many are out of shape.
Tina Turner was DEFINITELY an exception to the rule.🤨
She certainly was because her husband asked her more than one time to marry her and she finally accepted. I am glad she finally found love although she was one of the most beautiful women and entertainers. I believe he really loved her and cared about her genuinely.
Bottom line is that 99.9% of older women get played by younger men. This happens because the younger man will give off the illusion that he's genuinely interested in the woman & he see a future with her when in all actuality its a game from jump. He really just want the bragging rights and stability as tony said. Its always exceptions to the rule, but somewhere down the line, you will catch feelings, because, our end goal as women, is to be married with kids and have a husband that loves us unconditionally. The women that get it gets it. Thank you soo much Tony!
Women get played because sometimes they feel very alone and lonely they are also desperate and vulnerable. This is standing on dangerous grounds because a man can sense when a woman is desperate or otherwise and he will take advantage of an older woman especially. She generally has funds most of the time as Tony mentioned and the younger man pretends he wants a relationship with her so he can take her to the bank. I say any woman needs to wake up and see the daylight and know what scammers do and stop allowing them to take you out wine and dine you from your pocketbook and not his. Let him go because he is not worth doing anything with. And yes he may want bragging rights to say he has been with an older woman who is a cougar, but don't let him BRAG on You. It is senseless keep it moving!
The conclusion of the matter after every video is, love yourself and cultivate a relationship with God. No one can run game on you when you are moving through life with God.
You are so eloquent. What a diplomatic way to present this material - bravo.
I’m only 30 but I’m taking all these points into account because we just know dudes young and old borrowed and blue ain’t playing fair
Listen to this yu are 30 or younger It will save yu lots of pain men can be great liars manipulating yu to gain anything to leave you
Great topic! Coach Tony, I like that you emphasized "PURE & GENUINE". Love the honesty that is hard to ingest. Semantics sends the majority spinning their wheels and lost in translation. Coach you explained yourself thoroughly and expressly. Keep going sir!
I read most of the comments. I think alot of peoples are misunderstanding Tony's point. First of all, I am 60 and is happily married to my Soulmate for 39 years. We both look like we are in our 40s with a young personality. Anywho, Tony is not speaking for EVERY older woman young man relationship. He is basically saying that in MOST cases, when a younger man is dating or pursuing an older woman 10 years or older than him, his motive is a come up. Point, blank, period.
I know what you’re saying is so true. I didn’t know the whole game, but I knew to run every time they approached me. You just filled me all the way in and I’m here for it. Hurt my feelings to help me. Thank you sir.
“If men your age desire a woman younger, then why would a man younger than you genuinely desire a woman older?” - Tony Gaskins
My opinion .... It takes a mature man that set limits and will date only women his age ( or 5;years younger or older) It's seems most men are attracted to younger women to gratify there sexual desires. What about the inner beauty. ?? I'm putting my trust and faith in God ...... That he will place a nice Christian man in my path. I don't want to be used , manipulated or abused .... Especially. When the older we get....if there's more lies and deception.... It's so much harder to be resilient. And remain faithful. There's men and women that are using one another . It's all very sad. .
@@genovasquez8361 You seem to be everywhere throughout these comments looking for some attention with this rhetoric. A nearly 50 year old man preying on 23 year olds is quite pathetic. As a woman, I can guarantee the only ones to respond to you are those who've been severely damaged and looking for a father figure and/or those who need a sponsor aka sugar daddy.
@@genovasquez8361 that ain't love bro, that's lust lol
@@genovasquez8361 That doesn't make sense. Attraction and lust are two different things. Replace lust with the word attraction, then your comment would make sense. If you're lusting straight off the bat then that's a problem. It will never last if you're lusting. Men like you confuse lust with love. It can never be love if lust is the initial feeling.
I believe Tony is a narc. He says he trying to be helpful. But, I think he sending his wife a message. If you older and younger men are attracted to you its not a sin. In the bible when a man died. Someone married his wife
Usually wife had a younger man to impregnate and carry on the man who died name.😊 Narcs will take revenge on you. He is a nice covert narc and you ladies dont recognize him. Jesus Christ is Lord.😊
Hello Sir, I am a 56 yr old lady with a 33 & 26 yr old son and daughter. I’ve watched and liked many of your vids… and honestly can’t recall ever commenting. But THIS vid!!! Omg was definitely an eye opener for me! I’ve been out of the dating scene for 15 yrs at least but have considered at least starting with phone convos. Don’t wanna say too much more but I appreciate hearing pointers and value the opinions from real men … thank you and know you are an exceptional, intentional and awesome coach!!!
If you are a 40 year old woman and you like a 20 year old boy, its because you are cognitively 20.
Lol.😅
😂😂😂 funny but sometimes this is very true
🤣… agreed
😂😂😂
👏🏽👏🏽
Thank you! Mine is 4 years younger, but I’m definitely listening and paying attention to signs and symptoms!
At this point, I just go to work and stay to myself. It’s all so discouraging tbh. 😔
🎯
Seriously! It’s sad.
Hello Tony,
Thank you for the truth! It certainly makes sense about not dating over five years younger than your age. I am black and Puerto Rican and look clear/white and I am 68 years old. It is really tough to find a decent man who really loves me for me. I am very patient and waiting and working on me, my brain and my business while I wait.
God bless you and your family for all you do to enlighten us. 🙏🏼
Tony is RIGHT... There are SO MANY older LADIES on Tik Tok WARNING younger ladies talking about now they're homeless & living in the car in a whole different state off the strength of a dude!😢
See....bump that.....u suppossed to get wiser the older u get tf😮
Dang this hurt my heart. But its only confirmation. I got one thats 15 years younger. I never date young because of the maturity level. But this one slid his way in somehow🤷🏾♀️ Its only been a month and God keeps telling me "aht aht this is not the one"😅 😢 and ive been battling with breaking this soul tie because i earnestly know better! Please pray for me...
I just allowed myself to get played by one as well. My intuition told me at the beginning no but I proceeded anyways. I forgive myself for making the mistake or not listening to my intuition and moving on. This video was much needed.
Relationships are truly a meeting of the minds; point blank, period. You need to be smart/pay attention to "red flags" no matter the age.
Thank you kindly Tony for putting me on to the game. Some things I knew and some things you enlightened me on. You are appreciated!!!
I would rather be hurt with the truth than killed with a lie.
Thank you for the message Tony. This was so good and a confirmation