Being your Own Life Coach | John Muldoon | TEDxShanghaiAmericanSchoolPuxi

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 728

  • @icakad3805
    @icakad3805 3 роки тому +1238

    I have a notebook with 76 things that I am thankful and number 76 is actually youtube recommending me this video

  • @HallieEva
    @HallieEva 2 роки тому +512

    My mom use to tell me she was proud of me and how much she loved me so after she died a would flash back automatically to her saying those things when things would get rough times so she made a positive impression that will last my entire life. So always give positive words to the people you love including yourself.

    • @joynotoneofthem1244
      @joynotoneofthem1244 2 роки тому

      Wwxxe n we p m

    • @daala6698
      @daala6698 2 роки тому +7

      Not my mother. They said they were proud of me but in my grown years, even being older, I only once asked her and my dad, For what? and they couldnt think of anything. I felt so sad.

    • @Suewi7
      @Suewi7 2 роки тому +6

      I wish had parents like yours, a lots people not so lucky as you are.

    • @Stompii01x
      @Stompii01x 2 роки тому +8

      @@daala6698 your parents might not have known, but I am proud of you.
      I'm just a stranger on the internet and what you said really hit home.
      I'm proud of you because you are an amazing person.
      I hope you can realize that

    • @ghostfrys
      @ghostfrys 2 роки тому +1

      @@Stompii01x 💖✨

  • @candykandy
    @candykandy 3 роки тому +339

    1. Give sincere thanks 3 times a day.
    2. Be great. Say you’re great.
    So simple yet so effective. Great talk!

    • @layotheleprechaun
      @layotheleprechaun 2 роки тому +2

      And if you’re not feeling great, how can you change this! 😎

    • @janineshideler4051
      @janineshideler4051 Рік тому +5

      Telling yourself that you are great shouldnt end there, to have a positive effect you need to tell yourself the reason why, or else those are wasted words.

    • @FlameBoyAnimations
      @FlameBoyAnimations Рік тому

      @@janineshideler4051 agreed

    • @mrssomeone2143
      @mrssomeone2143 Рік тому +3

      @@janineshideler4051 you don't need reason because it is hope that you are saying

    • @hannahbenz9394
      @hannahbenz9394 Рік тому +3

      I watched him last year and I mastered the "I'm great" habit. Tbh it really make me feel great about myself. Really nice tip👍

  • @stephaniehappycamper998
    @stephaniehappycamper998 3 роки тому +410

    Living out of my truck because of things out of my control, but the happiest I’ve ever been listening to Ted talks like this. You are the voice on my cassette

    • @moraleslauralucia
      @moraleslauralucia 3 роки тому +9

      Love this ❤️

    • @outresru7751
      @outresru7751 3 роки тому +15

      TED talks and podcasts are the best!
      I suggest to you listen to My True North and The Yes Theory Podcast 🥰
      wish you all the love and happiness ❤️

    • @WhiskyGravy
      @WhiskyGravy 3 роки тому +14

      Hope things are still going well! You ARE taking control of your Life! Hugs!
      May I also suggest a Tedx Talk: Magnus Walker, Following your Gut Feeling.
      God bless!

    • @MimiCavelli
      @MimiCavelli 2 роки тому +7

      The less you own the happier you are!

    • @cartergomez5390
      @cartergomez5390 2 роки тому +5

      @@outresru7751 Wow, this is awesome! I listen to podcasts a lot and today I'm driving somewhere for 2 hours. I will record the podcast on my phone to listen to it on the way there and back.

  • @lauraw.9876
    @lauraw.9876 Рік тому +14

    John Muldoon, you went to see your old teacher, and gave him a new memory to carry with him the rest of his life! And letting him know what a positive impact HE had on YOU was (I'll bet) such a valuable new memory for him.

  • @Tami-po3gr
    @Tami-po3gr 4 роки тому +252

    “Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside; dreams. Who looks inside; awakes.”
    🌻

    • @compupawn6064
      @compupawn6064 4 роки тому +13

      "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?"

    • @visionshark1910
      @visionshark1910 4 роки тому +3

      Well said 🦈

    • @Good.human.M
      @Good.human.M 4 роки тому +3

      Well said indeed 👏

    • @tamgsmith8077
      @tamgsmith8077 3 роки тому +2

      Thanks Tami that was a good one.

    • @laurahale9309
      @laurahale9309 3 роки тому +6

      @@compupawn6064 I can't know your heart, but I can know mine.

  • @coleloveland7821
    @coleloveland7821 3 роки тому +124

    I started doing exactly what he told us to do about a year or two ago and I've found peace and joy since then. If you found this video you are lucky, watch it and absorb as much as you can and your life will change.

    • @angelaroberts2882
      @angelaroberts2882 3 роки тому +5

      I hope so… gonna listen now. Thanks for the encouragement!

    • @stephanieleung91
      @stephanieleung91 3 роки тому

      @@angelaroberts2882 Po

    • @mysmirandam.6618
      @mysmirandam.6618 Рік тому +1

      No coincidence that I found this rn

    • @fatemehp1689
      @fatemehp1689 7 місяців тому

      ولی من که انگلیسی متوجه نمیشم

  • @1Ma9iN8tive
    @1Ma9iN8tive 3 роки тому +136

    1 - Choose to live an integrous life. Integrity in your daily routine.
    2 - Choose to pass your wisdom on not your suffering, your woe, and/or your trauma. Your Wisdom or your woe - choose your wisdom.
    3 - Choose to take risks don’t wait for proof. Don’t default to regrets. The majority of your fears don’t come true. Don’t look backwards for guidance - don’t look far over to chart new … who you were doesn’t know. Seek the unknown as the possible in your newness…and nowness.
    4 - Choose new words. Every word is a new universe at your service. These words have power to heal, frequencies to restore, vibrations to revitalise, energy to empower, momentum to transform.
    5 - choose to get up every day and bless your day. Base your gratitude for your new day on your being alive. This day will never come again.
    My addition
    6 - Learn to say “no” to time wasting - both yours and others that may impact your life negatively.
    7 - In a life of wisely practised “no’s” Dedicate one “yes” (no matter how small) to a spiritual inspiration gifted to you in your dreams. They only come once in a lifetime … (only on the rarest of occasion will two be gifted to an individual). When you say yes to that special dream you are dedicating your commitment to unborn generations long after your lifetime … the fruits of your dedication you shall not taste in your lifetime - but you “should” say yes to that dream never-the-less and manage any time wasting that seeks to derail your commitment. For dreams like these are answers to prayers your ancestors offered for you in their time as guiding wisdom you may employ to sow the seeds of inspiration as spiritual food your grandchildren’s grandchildren 7 generations beyond your life.
    Caroline Myss’s top 5 (plus 2)

  • @jenbanda8004
    @jenbanda8004 Рік тому +74

    Be your own coach
    1. Identify your emotional patterns
    2. Identify what you want to be - the opposite of bad emotional patterns
    3. Consciously change your thinking pattern to be more positive

  • @bigfish8280
    @bigfish8280 9 місяців тому +3

    Truly amazing and brave for this man to share his deepest and most private thoughts and experiences with the world.

  • @micaonyx5301
    @micaonyx5301 3 роки тому +25

    I have never seen or heard of this guy until today. I'm thankful that he showed up in my recommendation.

  • @salvadorhpo2030
    @salvadorhpo2030 3 роки тому +1438

    As a father I can tell you that there is a big chance your dad did not have those tapes in the car only for himself... I am going through a rough time in my life (100% sure I'll get through) and Iisten to ted talks and CD's while my son is in the car with me on purpose. I want my son to ge the wisdom for life before he actually needs it.

    • @98Ashlynne
      @98Ashlynne 2 роки тому +71

      That is an awesome comment. Your so right.

    • @arianamooon
      @arianamooon 2 роки тому +45

      Not to be underestimated the fact that he will now to go to books and videos instead of people around him on a lower level or at least know of the existence of such help. My mother had self-help books around I’m not sure if she read them or not.. I was in the library while other kids were taking drugs. It’s a struggle but I have seen so many parish. I’m surprise I am alive. And I know it’s because I cling to self-help and the idea of transformation and hope that I can achieve a good life. I am praying and working to change my life in to being able to parent my daughter where I am trapped in the cold right now. What I want the most is to enjoy my daughters presence and to teach her so she may understand what took me years of suffering and observation and failures to understand. I can lessen her load, I treat her like the blessing she is and I wish more parents honored this… the power they hold. The power we hold, in our child’s life. Many parents want to omit personal testimony, or true realness transparency of their life. Many people like to hide.

    • @dollyk263
      @dollyk263 2 роки тому +29

      I also listen to to TEDx Talks and Jordan Peterson so that my daughter can learn from them. Am praying it will work.

    • @uhanadi3j
      @uhanadi3j 2 роки тому +12

      I am sure that you will overcome the circumstances you're going through. My prayers to you & all of us

    • @pbinsb3437
      @pbinsb3437 2 роки тому +22

      You're the best dad...ever.
      My parents went through hard times and us kids didn't know until homes and cars were repossessed. I didn't go on my personal quest until I had hard times. Would have been nice to have started the most important education a whole lot younger.
      You're on the right path with your family. Keep it honest.

  • @k.g.m.254
    @k.g.m.254 3 роки тому +199

    I adore the manner in which he does the speech. Conversational like. I, like so many, can retain much more when I don't feel information is thrown AT me vs. SHARED in a conversational style. Major kudos for this. 👍👍

    • @kobe51
      @kobe51 2 роки тому +5

      Yes, i never got the impression that he is giving a lecture

    • @토킹어바웃-k2l
      @토킹어바웃-k2l 2 роки тому +4

      oh actually as an English speaker as a second language i thought the talking style was not preferable a bit compared to the lecture style. then I learned that how it feels varies depending on listeners and the circumstances from your comments. Thank you!

  • @lolaapelt8616
    @lolaapelt8616 3 роки тому +123

    Love that idea....be your own coach. Takes all of the hokiness out of the idea. What a beacon of hope this guy must be for so many young folk's. He's in the right career

  • @SorVanna
    @SorVanna 3 роки тому +57

    I will never forget my American History teacher, Mr. Hague, for believing in me when I didn’t know who I was. History teachers rock!!!

    • @samanthaangell956
      @samanthaangell956 Рік тому +1

      Seriously! I had TWO history teachers do this for me. History teachers really do rock.

    • @marialunsford8308
      @marialunsford8308 Рік тому

      Mr Don Cifra. Plantation Florida 💯 mine

  • @luchialiu
    @luchialiu 3 роки тому +65

    The how he gives - 1. Identify emotion/behavioral pattern 2. Source it 3. Think about what/who you want to become (goal) 4. Override the old behavioral patterns w new ones.

    • @juileb197473051
      @juileb197473051 3 роки тому +1

      We cannot change the other person, but we can choose the way we react to the situation. Develop the creators knowledge of situations, time and people have not changed since the beginning. You got your haves and your have nots, your oppressors and your peers being oppressed.

    • @amalshannoon3420
      @amalshannoon3420 Місяць тому

      Thank you very much

  • @mattpredictsofm.
    @mattpredictsofm. Рік тому +918

    As much as we control our mind and thoughts, I believe it is essential to seek professional help especially in areas of lacking. Personally, having overcome the pressure of loan debts following a life coach's advice and building up my finances with the help of one too, I do know the prominence of one to keep you going when times are tough.

    • @maryalchester
      @maryalchester Рік тому +4

      The only time you fail is when you fall down and stay down. When you connect to the silence within you, that is when you can make sense of the disturbance going on around you.

    • @Joannahunter_415
      @Joannahunter_415 Рік тому +3

      @@maryalchester Forehand I know the powers of affirmations too and coaches too. Coming from someone who's witnessed consecutive ups and downs, debt, bankruptcy, you name it but at the end, staying positive is worth it. Matter of fact having received advice from my coach, I started my pod and passively earn and hold a $293k ptf with Yvonne Annette Lively. So yes babe, life coaches are indeed important.

    • @mvanwie
      @mvanwie Рік тому +1

      ​ @Joanna Hunt Hold on, the portfolio manager with Morgan stanley? Was recently on a finup with Tate?

    • @denisegamble2973
      @denisegamble2973 Рік тому

      @@mvanwie How reliable are these Pms?

    • @bradsandler3526
      @bradsandler3526 Рік тому +1

      @@denisegamble2973 Given the massive flood of con artists, it may be difficult to find the proper person, thus it is important to check licensing. Although her website and resume are comprehensive. A 15 mroi on average is certainly wild.

  • @Coachfitz_
    @Coachfitz_ 3 роки тому +144

    This life coach journey is definitely insightful. When people truly commit to changing, dreams start coming true

  • @flip1980ful
    @flip1980ful 2 роки тому +51

    Most everything takes some practice before we get it. My parents told me devastating things about myself before and around 13 years old; my siblings believed these things too and speak the same way to me. I don’t speak with them anymore and it’s the best thing I ever did.

  • @ifnotnowthenwhen9063
    @ifnotnowthenwhen9063 Рік тому +88

    After listening to his speech I feel recognise my negative voices which came from my negative parents .My head is full of them .I am trying to balance them with positive thinking and definitely not doing the same mistake with my kids.This video should be in every school curriculum to teach teachers to use their mouth wisely and more positively towards their students.Amazing talk one of the best.

    • @lindsaylind7501
      @lindsaylind7501 Рік тому

      Very well said. Thank you for sharing i will take this as an advice

    • @learnasl1644
      @learnasl1644 Рік тому +3

      I'm a mom of 6. Thank you for sharing! Grateful for your transparency.

  • @MsFaithful
    @MsFaithful Місяць тому +3

    I cried while watching, I've been a lot in this life, and I'm in the process of healing.

  • @devonnabrown1234
    @devonnabrown1234 11 місяців тому +2

    Refresher is important as you age. Updating and learning new ways of thinking and behonest with yourself, as you age..... priceless. Humans help rescue other humans. Thank you.

  • @KaiteGordon
    @KaiteGordon 10 місяців тому +3

    I have been in a slap and only 10 minutes into listening to this I'm already thinking positive! Thankyou

  • @anitalenz5877
    @anitalenz5877 3 роки тому +31

    A testament to the power of teachers.

  • @steph_and_airi
    @steph_and_airi 3 роки тому +28

    Thank you. For most of my life I've been struggling through one form of unhappiness or anger or upset or another. And my answer is almost always I'm fine. Even to myself. It's fine. I'll be fine. This will work out fine. It's only been recently that I've started getting really honest with myself and really sharing how not fine I sometimes feel. And you know what, I am happier and more at peace with myself and I have been in a long time. today was kind of a rough day. And I needed to be reminded of everything I have to be grateful for. And actively think about those things. My daughter, who's eight, often hears me talking on the phone or to myself and I've noticed that she started to pick up a lot of the same negative habits that I have. I am trying very hard to change that because I don't want her to go through life angry and unhappy because she is the brightest light of my life. She has such Joy and love in her heart. This just basically reminded me to make sure that I watch my thought patterns. Not only in my head but also out loud. The viewpoint that I have is often narrated throughout my day in the way that I see things, in the way that I speak to others, in the way that I deal with situations. If we could all just be a little more grateful we'd all be a lot more happy.

  • @thanhhà1-c8e
    @thanhhà1-c8e 17 днів тому

    Express gratitude three times a day.
    Strive for greatness. Remind yourself that you're great.
    It's so simple, yet incredibly powerful. Great message!

  • @JulieMelillo
    @JulieMelillo 4 роки тому +68

    As a life coach, you don't need to trick yourself. One thing that helps is to shift your focus from "Me, my, myself, I" to the rest of the world. A lot of suffering comes from the self-focus. Look at how many times he uses these words. You can definitely coach yourself though, but you have to learn how. A lot is shifting away from the ego (what people think of you, writing narratives in your mind so you feel better), to asking questions like "What can I do about this?" And then taking small actions towards it.

    • @imanjoseph612
      @imanjoseph612 3 роки тому +16

      He said exactly that. He was asking himself how he could change it and what action to take.

  • @HIGHLANDER_ONLY_ONE
    @HIGHLANDER_ONLY_ONE 3 роки тому +10

    I've been reading The Secret, and I listened for weeks the CD that went with the book, and I started listening to Deepak Chopra, and Louis Hay. One day at 2 AM going upstairs I hadn't super happy and grateful for all I have. The feeling was amazing, and I started practicing this gratefulness often. I started a practice of being grateful that I created myself, and since practicing it, my life has changed considerably. It's AMAZING!!! Thank you for this video!!!

  • @citizenjournalist2401
    @citizenjournalist2401 3 роки тому +167

    I bet dad had those tapes going in the car not just for himself...🙌🏼👏🏼dad💯

    • @anitatrlin4484
      @anitatrlin4484 3 роки тому +8

      Agree I play mai back ground motivation for mai children too they hate it 😂😂😂😂😂but watching this they may dad get it too

    • @caseteamcouture8633
      @caseteamcouture8633 3 роки тому +3

      I do the same!! Hopefully my daughter picks up that her life can get better.

    • @GoingMerry-xb7wu
      @GoingMerry-xb7wu 5 місяців тому

      Btt5

  • @jennifers6560
    @jennifers6560 3 роки тому +69

    This was great. I feel like he was totally himself just telling his story.

    • @kylegary6311
      @kylegary6311 2 роки тому +3

      I think you're right. I feel the same way.

  • @julierichens4218
    @julierichens4218 3 роки тому +41

    This young gentleman was so profoundly humble and thought-provoking. I am really grateful that I got to listen to him. I like everything he had to say and I think it's quite beneficial. I give him a great big thumbs up!

  • @caseteamcouture8633
    @caseteamcouture8633 3 роки тому +12

    I will never look at the silence I receive when I ask “ How are you ?”as bad or that the question goes ignored or unanswered as personal. I used to automatically say “ I’m good” every time I was asked.. even when I DEFINITELY wasn’t. I’m happy to realize that I have been working on me.. accidentally and purposely..and being more authentic and honest with ME. This video taught me that I am my own coach! Thanks!!

  • @h.davidburstein3578
    @h.davidburstein3578 3 роки тому +133

    Great talk. Although it took a while to get to the main bits of advice, the story helped the process of softening us up to receive his message. This deserves a lot more views. Thanks

    • @elizabethseiden9938
      @elizabethseiden9938 2 роки тому +3

      Amazing video!! Powerful message!! I’ve been trying to transform myself into the best version of myself that I can be!!! For many years I let myself down not knowing why.

  • @ryansturdivant387
    @ryansturdivant387 3 місяці тому +4

    This is the most relatable Ted speaker I've seen so far

  • @DavidBrowningBYD
    @DavidBrowningBYD 2 роки тому +27

    This is brilliant, and exactly what I need today. The first time someone suggested--well, actually offered unsolicited advice in a harsh way--that I should no longer claim my issues, my sadness, my defects as my identity, I had no clue what he meant. It took me years to understand his suggestion, and it remains a lifelong task. I'm sure it is for many people.

  • @DTrainsWife01
    @DTrainsWife01 2 роки тому +8

    My 6th grade social studies teacher was also my favorite teacher ever. He was very supportive and kind during a difficult time in my life. Social Studies was not my favorite but Mr. Robinson was the BEST!

    • @bajone02
      @bajone02 2 роки тому

      My 6th grade teacher was Ms Kenzerski. I did like how she dressed and she was quite a bit younger than the other teachers I usually had. She made an impression since I can still remember THAT name after about 55 years. She called me out one day because I made a face when somebody answered a question since the answer wasn't how I would have responded. The kid answering the question was just taking their time getting to the point that I would have said first. So the response was right eventually but the reaction I made as an animated kid was evidently the last straw for Ms K I have no clue what else was in her life that day because she let me have it . I didn't make any noise or shout out the answer or wave with a panic to get her to call on me next. I probably did make a smirky know-it-all face, but everyone was watching the teacher instead of me, so Ms K was the only one to really see my face. I was a smart kid and I did know a lot of the answers. She turned her head over toward me and said without batting an eye " hey Miss Smith, you always think you are so smart!". Silence as everyone turned sharp in their seat to see the geeky me turn all red in the face and look as dumbfounded as the rest of the kids with their jaws all dropped. Then everything in the class went back to normal. I think maybe I was kind of like Hermione Granger in those days. I have since forgiven Ms K but I did determine to keep my facial reactions a bit more controlled, at least in her class, after that. God bless you, Ms K. I hope you resolved whatever was bothering you that day so long ago.

  • @cap8487
    @cap8487 3 роки тому +19

    And every teacher and parent should hear 👂 your story...

  • @conradgiese3248
    @conradgiese3248 Рік тому +7

    Never heard of this guy but wow! Inspiration at its finest.

  • @lindseymartin7051
    @lindseymartin7051 3 роки тому +13

    I listen to things like this to help me overcome my anxiety and depression through a self made cognitive therapy if you will… thank so much for sharing

  • @melaniefox-smith8776
    @melaniefox-smith8776 4 роки тому +18

    You owe your sister for that awakening moment

  • @MinorThreat69
    @MinorThreat69 4 роки тому +437

    Thanks dude, what a great ted talk 👍🙂, my ADHD usually prevents me from watching these from start to to finish, but your humour and straight up honesty had me captivated right till the end. What a life story you shared! I'm a dad myself now and quite often super angry about stuff. Gonna read up on thought patterns and self affirmation now. Cheers from down Under ✌️

    • @evanspocket
      @evanspocket 3 роки тому +50

      Something that helps me with listening to Ted talks is listening to them at 1.5x speed. And while I listen I cook or do something productive. Helps me a lot, and your comment made me think of it and thought I should share :)

    • @juileb197473051
      @juileb197473051 3 роки тому +3

      Lmao

    • @robertzimberg
      @robertzimberg 3 роки тому +24

      The late Dr. Paul Kazmierzki, Director of the Learning Development Center at Rochester Institute of Technology, taught us: "Even people with ADD/ADHD can naturally have great focus on those things that they are highly interested in."
      So part of the secret of attention, completion and success, is to find a vocation (job), avocation (hobby), and inspiration which we find interesting, exciting, and meaningful. Because that will hold our attention and help us be more confident, competent and successful!

    • @revatherealestateagentandr8964
      @revatherealestateagentandr8964 3 роки тому +13

      @@evanspocket and Ro Zim: thanks for the tips, I appreciate you taking the time to put them here.

    • @lindamcadarra402
      @lindamcadarra402 3 роки тому +7

      I don’t know you but thanks, thanks for sharing!

  • @Serenitygracehope
    @Serenitygracehope 2 роки тому +16

    That was one of the best talks I have ever heard. Maybe not the message alone but the speaker. He is INCREDIBLE!

    • @cc1k435
      @cc1k435 2 місяці тому

      He sounds like a teacher (as he is one, of course), knowing his points but not sounding too rehearsed about it.

  • @johnayala2540
    @johnayala2540 3 роки тому +6

    The key to happiness is to talk to yourself...really good stuff. Gem gold

  • @philippevandensande2993
    @philippevandensande2993 Рік тому +1

    'I give sincere thanks every day.'
    My English is not good enough for this, but I'll try :
    I start every day praying and thanking for all the good things donated to me...
    Not only to God, but also to my mother and father, the grandparents, the teachers, my neighbourhood, my country... Even to UA-cam giving me this diamond !

  • @SamUndJet
    @SamUndJet 3 роки тому +11

    John Muldoon’s students are fortunate to have him at the helm of their school. His life experiences and ability to reinvent himself have given him a super strength for understanding the human heart, especially the heart of an angry kid. Thank you for sharing your story, Mr Muldoon, with candor and humility. I shall now go forth and practice gratitude and being great. In other words, Mr Muldoon has persuaded me to try mind over matter, or should I call it, mind over what’s-the-matter?

  • @bourge66
    @bourge66 3 роки тому +15

    Thank you @JohnMuldoon. I’m so grateful that a UA-cam platform kept your TEDtalk alive for me to watch it 3 years later this very morning! It inspired me to do the work of discovering my thoughts.

  • @Transform_with_Tea
    @Transform_with_Tea 2 роки тому +17

    This is very helpful with the chapter of life I’m in right now. I actually prayed about this a few hours ago and boom here you are with the answer. Thank you buddy

  • @Manal_aka
    @Manal_aka 3 роки тому +18

    This should be called “ How to HEAL” ❤️

  • @jodycasey4541
    @jodycasey4541 3 роки тому +17

    Giving this gentleman a high five for this great talk! Love this channel!

  • @karenkutensky2380
    @karenkutensky2380 3 роки тому +11

    Anger. Yes there’s so much out there. Listen to the voices, choose wisely. 💕

  • @rosaliaali3099
    @rosaliaali3099 3 роки тому +5

    Thank you for this talk. Thank you Mr. Muldoon for sharing your story

  • @ashleyanastasia7779
    @ashleyanastasia7779 3 роки тому +21

    I love that you set rules for yourself, that you coach yourself, and that you take it seriously!
    I sometimes struggle with taking the self-coaching deeply seriously, but I definitely have set stringent rules for myself throughout my life, and I love it. I'm actually watching this to get inspiration for a second monthly challenge for this month.

  • @Kathrynlove
    @Kathrynlove 3 роки тому +27

    Right. Like my Mom never loving me and telling me all my life that I was bad. So. I believe that I am bad even though I don't believe that I am bad...I have been struggling all my life...I am going to tell myself everyday positive things. I am really hard on myself. I will be great and I will be grateful.

    • @vickiellenwilliams9531
      @vickiellenwilliams9531 3 роки тому +9

      Tell yourself I love you Kathryn as soon as you wake up! Every day. Go ahead and treat yourself the way you wanted your Mom to! It’s your turn to be supported.

    • @eh4074
      @eh4074 3 роки тому +9

      I love that you are empowering yourself! Her lack of love or inability to show it has everything to do with her, and nothing to do with you. Stay strong! Like he said it does take work, but I guarantee that you are worth love, and can do good things with your life.

  • @nickryan3053
    @nickryan3053 Рік тому +2

    John probably has no idea the impact his presentation has had on our lives. Thanks for sharing.

  • @honeybee7768
    @honeybee7768 3 роки тому +8

    I liked his talk and he made some great points based on his real experience. However, I think what helped him the most to get out from under his anger was making the conscious effort to be sincerely grateful to others and to tell them. This propelled him into the PRESENT moment and it involved ACTION as well as CONNECTION with others, so it must have improved his relationships, too. I am going to try this! I have often written gratitude lists as a way to overcome my depression, but it only helped a little and after awhile, it got repetitive and almost robotic so it lost its power. He does a good job with the questions to ask ourselves, too. I think the message here is - talk to yourself honestly, but also talk to others :).

  • @sangeethamarella31
    @sangeethamarella31 2 місяці тому +1

    Not me thinking to myself today that I've got to be my own coach and guide myself coz no one knows me better than I do.. And later on stumbling across this gem. Talk about synchronicities💖

  • @franboone5421
    @franboone5421 2 роки тому +1

    Louise Hay was a pioneer for her “Mirror work!” At a seminar I attended many years ago in Toronto, she asked the audience to look into a mirror and say,” I love you! I really love you!” And remember to look in the mirror daily!
    Of course I don’t always remember to do it! A good Ted talk to reflect on the importance of positive 😍 self talk so I must get to it!

  • @MadelinePierce-p9y
    @MadelinePierce-p9y Місяць тому

    Came across this video and I do believe that we should be able to believe in ourself so that we can go on life without regrets.

  • @lakitagalebeautycare9354
    @lakitagalebeautycare9354 2 роки тому +2

    I was this movie star," but in my mind I was nothing!" I actually tricked my mind for years. Every day I wish that school would just burn up. The girls mocked me and whipped me after school a lot. I still didn't stop. I have really, "done it this time!" I want to thank you for accepting me into the circle. Every week I have to make listening to you my priority. Sir(John MUL), I am the happiest girl in the world, "speakers are gifts from God!"

  • @darlenekeo
    @darlenekeo Рік тому +1

    One of the best speeches to help myself and my children. Sincerely. THANK YOU 💜

  • @cacurazi
    @cacurazi 3 роки тому +6

    16:14 "The sweet, sweet joy of an unbelievable moment in life might be fleeting for someone that has predominantly negative thought patters."

  • @lerakrasimirova2245
    @lerakrasimirova2245 2 роки тому +5

    This is probably my favourite Ted talk of all time . Thank you for sharing your story with us. I felt every word you said. Thank you once again.

  • @veearya562
    @veearya562 2 роки тому +9

    Very impressive and so very true! Our biggest and most challenging task is to coach ourselves to the life we want.

  • @outresru7751
    @outresru7751 3 роки тому +37

    wow! I always wondered if people like me existed who kept a track of their own thoughts, feelings and how my brain generates chenicals depending on how I Choose to react to a situation (not how my brain wants to)
    I'm 17yrs old and due to covid, I've been keeping track of my emotions and my thoughts by journaling a lot. I always think while writing that who that lukcy person would be who would read my diary after I die because I write everything so well with humour and life lessons!😂😂
    We humans learnt about how physical body works, and how the materialistic world, businesses and all work. But what we don't realise we need to study is the mind and emotions. Emotions are the basis of what we do, yet we are very lenient when it comes to emotions cause nobody can "see it" and we push things away.
    So I take time every 2 days or atleast once a week to reflect what's happening with me and guve advices to myself in my journal, it's hard sometimes but I have to because I'm the only one who can keep me sane and keep me happy y'know 💕😃

    • @Pursuepeace0715
      @Pursuepeace0715 3 роки тому +4

      thanks for posting this. I sometimes feel out of control. sometimes my thoughts overwhelm as if if I need to make a conscious effort to think positive
      when I "go dark" that is what call going negative. I have this self talk "now you know thst is not true let's break down every negative thought " or if i think about past mistakes. I have to tell myself " ok whats the point if reminiscing that happened years ago we can't fix it but we learned never do it again right?. Its a constant conversation but it helps.
      then I find myself worrying about the future getting older, life etc.. then I stress or have anxiety over it. I know its crazy. but working on how to fix or deal with it.

    • @outresru7751
      @outresru7751 3 роки тому +6

      @@Pursuepeace0715 your welcome! my family shares a lot about almost everything, so I get thr knowledge of all the good and bad in world and get overwhelmed sometimes. But in the end I realise that, it is only ME who can either fix or destroy myself, so it's all put choice. It's a choice to be happy and it's a choice to be sad, if you want to be sad we are just surrendering to something we can't even see i.e., our thoughts.. so yeah.
      "Your condition right now, is not your conclusion."
      I feel thoughts are there just to keep us on our toes about the possible situations y'know, it's the mind job. But your inner conscious, it's there to remind us what we really should do.
      take care, have a good day!💕

    • @CaRaLaaLaa
      @CaRaLaaLaa 2 роки тому +1

      I absolutely love that last line! We are the only ones who can keep ourselves sane and happy!

    • @CaRaLaaLaa
      @CaRaLaaLaa 2 роки тому

      I absolutely love that last line! We are the only ones who can keep ourselves sane and happy!

    • @outresru7751
      @outresru7751 2 роки тому

      @@CaRaLaaLaa 🥰 in the end, it's all about our ego and our expectations. We should be aware of how much we need, we need a healthy amount of all which we get through experience :)

  • @cesastein9812
    @cesastein9812 3 роки тому +37

    Your Ted Talk was wonderful and insightful. Thank you for your honesty which will help the young and not so young.

  • @melaniemimiterrell5462
    @melaniemimiterrell5462 2 роки тому +1

    I'm 64 and have gone back to work after being on disability it's for 13 years. When I'm asked how i am my reply is 1 of several. I'm HAPPY or, I'm about to have the best next 6 hours of my day!

  • @kaycollins7684
    @kaycollins7684 3 роки тому +4

    This is the best Ted talk,I've ever heard!!I have listened to them for years. This guy is smart ,charming and funny!!he helped me so much,he made so much since to me!! It was like a aha moment as Oprah would say!!!!!

  • @congruent-thoughts8781
    @congruent-thoughts8781 2 роки тому +8

    Whoow! What a fantastic Heroes journey. What a great story and metaphor for all the kids on your school. They are so fortunated to have you as a good example from where some of the boys or girls are and how they can come out of it on own hand. As a MasterCoach, MasterTrainer and PsychoTherapist I bow in front of you. We had a simular experience and see what I do for living now. 😀 It seems to me you also have studied on UC Santa Cruz. You have this very special spirit I know only from there.
    Thank you so much for sharing your story. 🙏💐🕊

  • @pauljubb7305
    @pauljubb7305 2 роки тому

    Thank you for all the affirmations that I've been using for the last 50 years.

  • @jeannieneuser5316
    @jeannieneuser5316 2 роки тому +10

    Somehow, I stumble across this approximately annually... And I am grateful every single time I listen.
    Thank you, John.
    God bless you. 💖

  • @cap8487
    @cap8487 3 роки тому +24

    Awesome!!!! Every child should hear your story💗

  • @tapashchatterjee3512
    @tapashchatterjee3512 2 роки тому +1

    IGNITING / MOTIVATING / EMPOWEING.......A MUST WATCH.......

  • @MotivationHaus
    @MotivationHaus Рік тому +1

    This guy is amazing, very intelligent, creative and comedic.

  • @jt2756
    @jt2756 2 роки тому +10

    This is very accurate. Reminds me of the work of Louise Hay and Wayne Dyer but not as spiritually driven. Manifesting, being selective of your thoughts, staying positive. If you say you are then you will be

  • @eddiegonzales3262
    @eddiegonzales3262 2 роки тому +10

    I wish my life was just filled with people from tedtalks

  • @bigfish8280
    @bigfish8280 9 місяців тому +1

    It's different when you are born with talent and are already great but you are down on yourself. That building yourself up to be great

  • @cindirose3390
    @cindirose3390 3 роки тому +22

    I truly enjoyed this. Thank you for taking the effort

  • @williamlamb2023
    @williamlamb2023 Рік тому

    It seems this is the best Ted speech I’ve heard in a while. What I took from it, is to value your thoughts before acting. Question them. Thanks John, I will forward this to my father, he will also enjoy your. Be your own coach, productive.

  • @enriquealmandoz8602
    @enriquealmandoz8602 Рік тому +2

    It takes a lot to talk so openly about oneself! Great story, never give up!

  • @lilycarone5116
    @lilycarone5116 2 роки тому +1

    The power of our mind! We can't just let it do it's own thing! I agree! Fantastic speaker.

  • @softjet6293
    @softjet6293 3 роки тому +23

    Would make a great comedian..I know he’s serious but the audience is laughing. Great presentation.

  • @josenoya-InspirationNation
    @josenoya-InspirationNation 3 роки тому +13

    Loved the perspective on the fake it till you make it and that it doesn’t work. You have to really self reflect and be honest and find out why you feel the way you do! Thank you!

  • @yesreneau
    @yesreneau 2 роки тому +3

    Wow. This man has a way with words

  • @mariabuckley1749
    @mariabuckley1749 3 роки тому +20

    I loved this talk, thank you.

  • @ojarquin74
    @ojarquin74 Рік тому +3

    Thank you for advice and for doing this lecture. This speaks to me. I’m working everyday on me and trying to enjoy my life. A million thank you 🙏

  • @jennifergilman8546
    @jennifergilman8546 2 роки тому +6

    Thank you John! I will be sharing w/so many…you told what I call “ Golden nuggets” for life’s lessons! I know this also may help some young men and women! Thank you so much!

  • @lindastewart4679
    @lindastewart4679 3 роки тому +15

    I really liked the suggestion that we should think about how our brain works, and what we keep telling ourselves every day. Be aware of that, and then you can change it. That really meant a lot to me, because I know that I have certain patterns that I need to change. But knowing that is different from thinking that your brain is doing this and seeking to change it by decision. Loved the speech! I will share it.

  • @rubinartstudios
    @rubinartstudios 2 роки тому +3

    Thank you, remembering how I also helped people. as you are helping me now...' Why does it take so long to reexamine my. lives? .I need to show off now.) My mother also reminded me of all my shortcomings.!!!... we do not need to do this to our children, why do we do it to them at times????? I am 85 years old and keep growing. It is a good feeling, and I do remind. anyone I meet ,reminding them to remember that life needs to be cherished-- Namaste.______
    Fiammetta Rubin N.D.( I worked on that one!!!!!.....I hated myself once......

  • @christinagaffney9124
    @christinagaffney9124 2 роки тому +5

    What a great Inspirational talk.
    I understand you 1000% .
    ❤💙👏👏👏👏👏👏👏

  • @genrenato
    @genrenato 2 роки тому +8

    I’m so happy to watch this video! The part about how being angry changes everything hit me so hard. I used to be so angry about a lot of things, most of which I wasn’t brave enough to confront or even acknowledge. Anger was my default reaction to any unpleasant thing simply because it was familiar, but in reality I hated it and pushed a lot of people away. Cue the pandemic and an outburst that led to self isolation, I was able to confront myself about everything, and that has changed my mindset for the better (hopefully forever). A HUGE weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I just feel so light, happy, and appreciative about everything! There’s a lot of things that can do us good if we just choose to forgive and let go. Let’s all be kind to ourselves, so we can be kind to others!

    • @JB-3794
      @JB-3794 2 роки тому +2

      The pandemic. I'm glad you mentioned it. I think it was a time of self reflection for a lot of people.

  • @veeherreraJanecka
    @veeherreraJanecka Рік тому

    Turning 60 this year has been life changing. I have decided to be okay with being happy. I’ve taken care of others for my entire s life. And though I will always want to give back I also need to take care of me too.

  • @pablosmitty4024
    @pablosmitty4024 3 роки тому +7

    Excellent presentation. It’s extremely important that we question where our emotions are based. It’s too easy to say I spilled a glass of water and that set me off. We have to recognize that feeling rage at spilling water, is a symptom.

  • @watchinglistening101
    @watchinglistening101 3 роки тому +6

    ONE OF THE BEST SPEECHES !!!!
    Used to be one of my lines teaching fitness classes.
    MIND over MATTER.

  • @playsavedthechild.2848
    @playsavedthechild.2848 3 роки тому +1

    John Muldoon thank you for a positive talk and reaching out... to people who might learn from your experience.
    to readers in the comments.
    He never mentioned PLAY...
    But perhaps play... is how one talks to yourself... and create "create-attempts"...
    of your actions correlated to and accepting realities of what is...
    Be your friend... is what he seems to say.
    No matter whaat ...
    well the world is there it influences us...
    But it is not all of us
    We are potentially living many lives...
    and being our own friend is important
    especially if we lack them among people.
    And i know...
    Play saved the Child.
    And in a way i hear this affirmed by the message of John.
    Create a bit of happiness... and it can open a new door and direction.

  • @laurinstarck1071
    @laurinstarck1071 2 роки тому

    This is the best Ted Talk I’ve watched hands down. It’s completely authentic , and genuine and honest, It is applicable to everyone, in any stage of their life or career. I loved it!

  • @vernaharris4700
    @vernaharris4700 3 роки тому +104

    Most young people who comitted suicide would probably still be alive today if someone just showed a little interest in them.

    • @robinr5669
      @robinr5669 3 роки тому +13

      Sometimes we do absolutely everything we can and they still do it.

    • @lucyko3000
      @lucyko3000 3 роки тому +3

      Yeah. I showed interest in the person I loved but he just had this idea that he is/or wants to be lonely and in fact he did. And im trying and looking for reasons ro go on and its really hard. So interest does not help if a person is not interes5ed in himself.

    • @vernaharris4700
      @vernaharris4700 3 роки тому +4

      @@lucyko3000 This is a good point. This is why I said most young people not all.❤

    • @lindacorrin7847
      @lindacorrin7847 6 місяців тому

      Amen 🙏

    • @freddyperla7944
      @freddyperla7944 2 місяці тому

      The environment is a good determinant of how people behave so design is paramount. Houses are designed to separate people. Think about how big bedrooms are. Likewise buildings are also designed to separate people. Change the physical environment, behaviors change.

  • @johnayala2540
    @johnayala2540 3 роки тому +14

    One of the best talks I've heard. I saw myself in this man whrn I was his age. It's freaky to hear your life story being narrated by a stranger who grew up in the other side of the world but the similarities are shocking in a good way. I'm not that weird after all😏

  • @MeganS1995
    @MeganS1995 9 місяців тому +1

    When he said that the voices talk to each other, I thought of Internal Family Systems therapy and how it explains the system of cognition through parts as well as a Self (your authentic core personality). There are exiles (shadows in Jungianism) that were disowned/rejected and hold extreme beliefs, feelings, and behaviors. These parts push their way into consciousness, often when triggered... Then there are managers and firefighters who try to keep the exiles out of conscious awareness (like through defense mechanisms). Very, very deep healing therapy that can help you make sense of your internal system!

  • @chilatelover
    @chilatelover 2 роки тому +4

    very few of us get taught proper self care and a good life philosophy. We have to get this wisdom from multiple sources some more obvious than others. ...since so many institutions fail us. Bravo for posting this. There is no shame in cassettes by the way.

  • @sarahmcnicol.lifecoach
    @sarahmcnicol.lifecoach 2 роки тому +4

    Happily there’s so much helpful content widely available these days for managing our unruly minds. This engaging story is easy to get drawn into and the tips are super simple to follow. Thanks