5 signs of emotional abuse | Haleh Banani

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 81

  • @sleeping_beauty8558
    @sleeping_beauty8558 Рік тому +27

    You described my husband to the t. The degrading, the excessive controlling, the constant criticism, the accusations and blame he somehow shifts solely on me all the time. The silent treatment. The threats. The gas lighting. The passive aggressiveness that never ever pauses. It’s toxic! I can’t express my feelings or my needs without some word getting twisted and twisting my feelings or my needs into something bad.
    I’m not a co dependant. SubhanAllah, I know I have what it takes Alhamdullah to succeed without him. But he’s had me trapped in a foreign country for the past ten years by using my children as pawns. May Allah protect me and all women from diseased hearted men.

    • @nellywilde9541
      @nellywilde9541 Рік тому +1

      May Allah swt help you through this sister

    • @missahmed786
      @missahmed786 Рік тому +1

      How r u dealing with him now???? R u stilll with tht man???

    • @sleeping_beauty8558
      @sleeping_beauty8558 Рік тому

      @@missahmed786 I am and live in Jordan of all places. I'm not a citizen nor do I have residency, my ex purposely kept me undocumented so I would have little chance of a fair custody agreement or getting a job.
      He’s still refusing to register our American divorce in local court to avoid the red line he’d be forced to adhere to once it is.
      Ironically the legal paper (marriage) that’s meant to secure my rights as a wife, mother and human , he’s using to maintain his rights to insult me, threaten me and cross boundaries I’m trying to protect all on my own. Despite my ex’s abuse and his family’s refusal to help, my es is p@lestinian btw., my personal story doesn't affect my deep sympathy and compassion towards the P@lestinians in G@za. I feel impotent knowing | can't criticise the government here because I'd be thrown in prison and most likely be deported. Loosing all access to my children. But the more I read about the Jordanian stance on the P@lestinian issue the more self restraint I must practice. Maybe the fact that I was betrayed, oppressed and gaslight by the one person who was supposed to protect me, has helped me relate with the P@lestinians in G@za on a deeper level than most.
      I understand and feel their pain.
      Hasbunallahu Wa Nimal Wakeel fi all the oppressors worldwide!
      I pray for justice and FREEDOM for all victims of Gaslighting and Oppression specially the P@lestinians in G@za. I mention gaslighting specifically because I’ve witnessed how dangerous and destructive this tactic can be.

    • @Sk24266
      @Sk24266 9 місяців тому +1

      Seems like you are describing my husband

    • @LamiaTabassum-fn5ig
      @LamiaTabassum-fn5ig 6 місяців тому +1

      i am going through the same. but cant take it any more. how r u coping? can i knw?

  • @faymoosa5064
    @faymoosa5064 Рік тому +18

    Narcissist are not willing to change. 😢

  • @asfiahussain4927
    @asfiahussain4927 6 місяців тому +3

    May Allah reward you to explain these all signs,because sometimes it is not easy for the person to explain ,what kind of zulm or evil he or she is receiving from another person

  • @rajashah702
    @rajashah702 6 місяців тому +4

    😭😭This is what i am facing right now with my husband. All what you said describe him. Thanks a lot. Bless you ❤❤

  • @waheedasyedshameemahmed6673
    @waheedasyedshameemahmed6673 Рік тому +10

    Assalamualaikum sister. Iam in a abusive relationship even I am educated and working. I have been married for 12 years, I don’t have a child. My husband as you mentioned is controlling me in everything. I can’t speak to him normally. I am living this life just for my mother as a formality for the world. I don’t know what is the solution for this and how long this will go. He is just using me for money so that I can earn and give him. I am not involved in any important decision he makes like buying a asset. He and his family discusses everything and takes decision. I am just like a thing in his life to use me when he needs. I am emotionally broken. Just praying to Allah that he shows some mercy on me.

    • @mahrukhameer3250
      @mahrukhameer3250 7 місяців тому +2

      Sister Allah has provided you the way of seperation. I know it's difficult to say but Allah will give you vastness as mentioned in Qur'an. Do istekhara and Allah will make your way clear for you

    • @hameedjavad130
      @hameedjavad130 2 місяці тому

      Same here

    • @meinkagazorqalam
      @meinkagazorqalam 2 місяці тому

      @@waheedasyedshameemahmed6673 i have been there for 16 yrs. Left since 2 months. Felt peace since the very first day he left.

  • @latinalife2458
    @latinalife2458 Рік тому +2

    Oh sister am glad I found the video
    I been abuse for 18 years, a year ago he was dating and dumping me in his country with lies and lies .
    Now he wants to take even my little from me. The boys are 18 now and willing to help him in any way !!! It hurts me so much when they talk because he has manipulated so much!

  • @anujarahim8533
    @anujarahim8533 Рік тому +2

    Jazaki Allahu khairan katheerah dear sister, that was spot on 🎉

  • @gul.12
    @gul.12 2 роки тому +5

    Thank u sister.May Allah reward you.🤲🏼As always your lectures are so inspiring,waiting for your more lectures.🌹

  • @numidiajurjur3467
    @numidiajurjur3467 2 роки тому +5

    Tooooo late to know😓the damage invade every aspect.

  • @zuraydadamon1332
    @zuraydadamon1332 2 роки тому +5

    Sister Haleh you are a blessing you opened my eyes and help me to be a confident muslima shukran may Allah bless you abundantly Ameen

  • @Tailltaill602
    @Tailltaill602 Рік тому +2

    This is such a reassuring and enriching video... Jazaka Allahu khayr Haleh.

  • @sanji546
    @sanji546 2 роки тому +8

    Our mothers put us in this situation asking to sty in abusive marriage

  • @mikaeels.6477
    @mikaeels.6477 Рік тому +11

    The cold shoulder (stonewalling) is a form of emotional abuse. This is a very very low level of behavior from the person who does it.

  • @peaceinyourheart116
    @peaceinyourheart116 3 місяці тому +1

    This is so hard being in an abusive relationship... it is so sad

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  2 місяці тому

      Salam Alaikum sister!
      Being in an abusive relationship can be incredibly difficult and emotionally draining. It's important to acknowledge your feelings and know that you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness.
      Here are some steps you can take to address the situation and find support:
      1. Recognize the Abuse - Understanding and acknowledging the signs of emotional abuse is the first step towards addressing it. Trust your feelings and instincts.
      2. Seek Support - Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or community leaders who can provide support and guidance. You don't have to face this alone.
      3. Educate Yourself - Learn more about emotional abuse and its impact. This knowledge can empower you to make informed decisions about your relationship.
      4. Consider Professional Help - Speaking with a trained professional can provide you with the tools and strategies to cope with and address the abuse. Our Banani Method trained coaches are available to offer personalized support. You can learn more about scheduling a session here: [halehbanani.com](halehbanani.com/).
      5. Evaluate Your Options - If the abuse is impacting your well-being, it may be necessary to reevaluate the relationship. Your safety and mental health are paramount.
      Remember, you are not alone, and there are resources available to help you navigate this challenging situation. May Allah ﷻ grant you strength and guide you towards peace and healing.
      Best regards,
      Aisha, on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani.
      Haleh Banani's Support Team

  • @Ela-mj5bc
    @Ela-mj5bc 2 роки тому +29

    With narcissist personalities is very hard to deal with .

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  2 роки тому

      That is true

    • @paryanatahiri3433
      @paryanatahiri3433 2 місяці тому

      @@Ela-mj5bc my husband is a narcissist and also has OCD its been a month if our marriage he has beaten me to death and emotionally he has tortured me since the engagement

    • @Ela-mj5bc
      @Ela-mj5bc 2 місяці тому +1

      @paryanatahiri3433 no one should stay in a abusive relationship if you can support yours self and having your family by your side tell him bye bye.Especialy religious men they think they are sent from above to tell us women how should we be.

  • @HomeFrendsten
    @HomeFrendsten Рік тому +2

    Thank you for this video,narcstc mothrs complain about daughtrs or sons since infancy

  • @foreveryoung806
    @foreveryoung806 2 роки тому +3

    Salam honourable Sister Haleh..thank you for letting us have this to be aware.of such..But this concept can also be applied for other types of relationship like parents and child? Amongst friends?

  • @meandme7798
    @meandme7798 Місяць тому

    Alhamdullilah! I am in all of these 5 signs. Alhamdullilah!!!Allah have given me a strong heart and mind, I go with it just to make it all less stressful for me and my son. Alhamdullilah! Allah is holding me up and keep me unshaken.

  • @antionettemurray6389
    @antionettemurray6389 Рік тому +2

    You articulate this subject very well. Thank you for your input and your UA-cam channel.🥰😇

  • @yazzbazzs3602
    @yazzbazzs3602 2 роки тому +6

    Nothing but truth🙏

  • @englishandbiohub6621
    @englishandbiohub6621 5 місяців тому +1

    My mother is like this 😮so hard to speak the truth and i cane even lie to just keep her happy bit i want her happy too and my mental peace too

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  5 місяців тому

      Thank you for your comment. I understand how challenging it can be to balance honesty with keeping your mother happy, especially when it affects your mental peace.
      It's important to address your feelings and try to overcome any resentment. Forgiveness can be a powerful tool in healing.
      If you and your mother need support in managing your emotions and overcome the emotional abuse, consider setting up an individual session with a Banani Method trained coach. You can find more information here: [halehbanani.com](halehbanani.com/).
      Best regards,
      Aisha, on behalf of Sr. Haleh Banani.
      Haleh Banani's Support Team

  • @KamaraMabinty-ye3kp
    @KamaraMabinty-ye3kp Рік тому +3

    This is exactly my husband he Always make decisions when he is upset he will talk at me for one or two hours sometimes I said to him I am not a child I am your wife

  • @fatmatabintasow4668
    @fatmatabintasow4668 Рік тому

    This is what am going through for the past 12 year and he so nice to my family and his family so even if I try to explain nobody will believe me😢

    • @Sumayyah-ho1wl
      @Sumayyah-ho1wl 10 місяців тому

      SubhannAllah. Don't be sad Allah is with you. He see you tears. He hear your cries. Turn to Allah.

  • @badesabamir576
    @badesabamir576 Рік тому +2

    Jazakillah kher

  • @user-zm3no5xb6t
    @user-zm3no5xb6t 19 годин тому

    He said I’m not pretty. Then why do these men say they like you or be with you?

  • @farashe1893
    @farashe1893 9 місяців тому

    These all totally what I feel in my relationship with my husband right now, How to deal with such abussive husband which always make me feel I’m the one wrong

  • @baigayat9137
    @baigayat9137 6 місяців тому

    We are so many with more or less the same issues with our spouses however, one of my professors at the mosques told me that the mistake was done from the beginning when I said yes to this marriage. It hurts to hear that but it’s true I do have my responsibility in this whether I like it or not or whether I believe that he’s the one making the marriage toxic more than me or not. So let’s just try our best. Marriage is not a life sentence, we should be able to get out of it but I understand the feeling of being trapped. May Allah make it easy and help us to learn from this hardship and not lose focus on our akhira. Sometimes it’s necessary to leave the marriage, but some other times if there’s enough maturity, there’s hope to work on it and crush the shaytan .Let’s not give up sisters. I share your pain and will be making dua for you InshaAllah. Don’t forget me in yours as well please.

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  5 місяців тому

      Salam Alaikum sister @baigayat9137 In Shaa Allah things will turn up great for all of us. Sister Haleh has a course called The Mindful Heart Acadamy, it has training, inspiration, practical tools in supportive community for women to achieve emotional strength and personal transformation. Sister Haleh is doing live session every Thursday at 1PM CST as well. See you there In Shaa Allah - HB's Support Team

  • @ahmadmaryam5420
    @ahmadmaryam5420 Рік тому

    This is my life right now

  • @HomeFrendsten
    @HomeFrendsten Рік тому +2

    toxic people also manipulate

  • @irm2708
    @irm2708 8 місяців тому

    He does everything but i have to stay 😢😢😢

  • @MohammedAli-vp9ie
    @MohammedAli-vp9ie Рік тому

    I'm unsure if I'm in an emotional abusive relationship or not even if I am I could never leave may Allah make it easy for me

  • @NRK7861
    @NRK7861 Рік тому

    Omg that is soo true my friend is going through that what should they do please help me so I can help her?..

  • @nuzhathjahan7184
    @nuzhathjahan7184 7 місяців тому

    You described my husband 😔

  • @LoveLifeLive1
    @LoveLifeLive1 Рік тому +1

    My husband had all the five properties and he was a narcissist... He alawys thinks that all was my fault. So he divorced me.

  • @rejhana1012
    @rejhana1012 2 роки тому +1

    You spoke against the husbands rights in Islam with the psychologie, in point 2 and 3..

  • @IfeomaAgha-ho9st
    @IfeomaAgha-ho9st Рік тому +1

    I caught my man touching another woman who came to serve us in our room with him tying only towel on his waste in my present, I confronted him and he angryly told me he is a man and I should not just start😭 no respect for me at all.... I'm still with him to save up little more before I ran for my life

  • @zohrabismillah9489
    @zohrabismillah9489 10 місяців тому

    Jzk for sharing

  • @yougotthiss
    @yougotthiss Рік тому

    How to get out when you have been gas lighted and you have an imposter syndrome in result.

  • @diniadem7852
    @diniadem7852 Рік тому

    Please sister answer me my question I am not in a good situation please my question is I’m married and I express my feelings when I’m very and also sad I cry allways,but my husband allways very angry on me and he thinks that I’m idiot,like I’m not strong enough instead of respecting the way I express my feelings . So what I have to do please

  • @petrichor3685
    @petrichor3685 2 місяці тому

    how can i reach out to you for therapy?

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  2 місяці тому

      Salam Alaikum.
      You can make an online booking through this link
      live.vcita.com/site/haleh.banani
      or drop us an email at support@halehbanani.com
      May Allah clear your mind and ease your restless heart.
      Regards,
      Aisha
      HB's Support Team

  • @MarilyCarpiso
    @MarilyCarpiso 9 місяців тому

    In Islam, what must we do if we have a husband who does that to us?

  • @LamiaTabassum-fn5ig
    @LamiaTabassum-fn5ig 6 місяців тому

    sister banani, do u provide therapy online? would like to know urgently. please help me

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  6 місяців тому

      Salam Alaikum sister @LamiaTabassum-fn5ig thank you for reaching out. Yes, sister Haleh is offering online coaching sessions, kindly find the link live.vcita.com/site/haleh.banani
      you can book a session online. Should you need further assistance kindly send an email at support@halehbanani.com - HB's Support Team

  • @spoonsofrowza
    @spoonsofrowza Рік тому +1

    My husband doesn’t want me to finish my education and says I should obey him for the betterment of the marriage and religion but I know by education I am not doing anything haram, I wear proper abaya,hijab,niqab and never talk to any male in the university but still he says it is my duty to stay home and not study anymore but I do feel like maybe in the future I will need to get jobs to financially support myself so I want to finish my education 😢 I don’t know what to do

    • @Sumayyah-ho1wl
      @Sumayyah-ho1wl 10 місяців тому

      It's not haram to educate yourself. Please don't give up your education.

  • @lambda1917
    @lambda1917 10 місяців тому

    God himself controls our life, so does it mean we have toxic relationship with him?

  • @tabbuansari6298
    @tabbuansari6298 Рік тому

    Can I take a session with you plz

  • @th5384
    @th5384 Місяць тому

    Salam Aleykum sister, I really need your help, me and my revert wife really need your help. Been with her 17 years and its kind of on the brink.. i have signed up. My name is Tariq, what do i need to do to set up a zoom call or something. Your help would mean the world, Jazakallah sis

    • @haleh_banani
      @haleh_banani  Місяць тому

      Salam Alaikum brother Tariq.
      Hope that all is well on your side.
      For online booking kindly refer to the link live.vcita.com/site/haleh.banani or for further assistance please drop me an email at support@halehbanani.com
      Regards,
      Aisha
      HB's Support Team

  • @ReihanaIfthikar
    @ReihanaIfthikar Рік тому

    How can I contact you sister.. to get some guidance L

  • @ature2003
    @ature2003 Рік тому

    Asalaam Walakum I tried not to escalate and remain feminine, I cannot deal with Beta type men no dis respect

  • @Tangentbordsblues
    @Tangentbordsblues Рік тому

    Having to wear an ugly tablecloth

  • @rehanagondal4865
    @rehanagondal4865 Рік тому +1

    I have vome out of my marriage after 55 years . I need to talk to someone . How can i contact you please dear sister

  • @Nadaflowers4
    @Nadaflowers4 Рік тому

    Thank you for sharing your beautiful 🎤 speech ❤️