Absurd Trolley Problems

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 24 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 8 тис.

  • @SirCheeto47
    @SirCheeto47 2 роки тому +10708

    I love how mark decides to kill himself rather than the other four people, not because he would sacrifice himself to save others, but because his pride tells him, “I bet you can take a trolley.”

  • @May-ii7sl
    @May-ii7sl 2 роки тому +4048

    2:42
    "Ethan is resting peacefully on the trails but Mark WANTS to be hit by the trolley, not because he is a masochist, but because he wants to see if his body can take it."

  • @schunga098
    @schunga098 2 роки тому +5849

    mark: "im not a masochist"
    also mark: "they are my clones this is what they would want"

    • @samkavanagh9165
      @samkavanagh9165 2 роки тому +30

      💀

    • @CICellDirectorCairmann
      @CICellDirectorCairmann 2 роки тому +23

      he doesnt get sexual pleasure from pain therefore hes not a masochist

    • @Micahthebee
      @Micahthebee 2 роки тому +35

      @@CICellDirectorCairmann shh don't ruin it

    • @schunga098
      @schunga098 2 роки тому +43

      @@CICellDirectorCairmann ye thats what you think

    • @GBArkais
      @GBArkais 2 роки тому +35

      Do we have a compilation of Mark trying to deny that he's a masochist yet?

  • @georgevoknerech228
    @georgevoknerech228 2 роки тому +4645

    3:14
    "I'm not a masochist. I bet I can take a trolley"
    - Markiplier, 2022

    • @UnLucky-sol
      @UnLucky-sol Рік тому +3

      1.5k likes and no replies? Let me fix that

    • @lemoniphobia
      @lemoniphobia Рік тому +16

      @@UnLucky-sol cant fix what isnt broken

    • @wObBlE73
      @wObBlE73 11 місяців тому +1

      😂

    • @WaylaidByEndlessNinjas
      @WaylaidByEndlessNinjas 8 місяців тому +4

      I mean, if his insides get in the trolley maybe he can stop the trolley
      ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    • @shmirie666
      @shmirie666 8 місяців тому +1

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂​@@WaylaidByEndlessNinjas

  • @krisdoesart9643
    @krisdoesart9643 2 роки тому +2961

    The concept of 5 identical Marks having a masochism fight as a train barrels towards them is so funny

    • @onebilliontacos3405
      @onebilliontacos3405 2 роки тому +100

      _They want to know if they can take it_

    • @DocKorbeno
      @DocKorbeno 2 роки тому +40

      ​@Repent and believe in Jesus Christ i snorted jesus' ashes

    • @acorn_acrom
      @acorn_acrom 2 роки тому +11

      @Repent and believe in Jesus Christ yo mama

    • @mihailmilev9909
      @mihailmilev9909 2 роки тому +1

      @@acorn_acrom who tf is steave jobs

    • @PVempati
      @PVempati 2 роки тому

      do you watch ludwig?

  • @thesiliconeduck5485
    @thesiliconeduck5485 2 роки тому +6973

    i love how mark always says "im not a masochist" as a defense for everything.

    • @Ghostlycatgirl
      @Ghostlycatgirl 2 роки тому +100

      Yeaaa "I'm not a masochists but I think I can handle a trolly"

    • @itzinzaynn6294
      @itzinzaynn6294 2 роки тому +29

      I imagine he thinks he can clinch his cheeks, get hit, and call it a day

    • @tinylollipop9542
      @tinylollipop9542 2 роки тому

      Jump in front of

    • @tinylollipop9542
      @tinylollipop9542 2 роки тому +1

      It

    • @reignpowerrandamody9460
      @reignpowerrandamody9460 2 роки тому +13

      Why is it that I can see an Avengers edit in my head of Mark grinning to Cap before turning around and just blocking the shit out of a Leviathan while screaming "I'M NOT A MASOCHIST I SWEARRRRRRR!" As the Leviathan just crumbles before him.🤣

  • @salahudeenarunkumar4283
    @salahudeenarunkumar4283 2 роки тому +2299

    Mark: I'm not a masochist
    Also Mark: *YES, LET US SEE IF I CAN WITHSTAND BEING RUN OVER BY A TROLLEY*

    • @MILF_enjoyer
      @MILF_enjoyer 2 роки тому +1

      Cringe + anime pfp + ratio

    • @star_deaths3109
      @star_deaths3109 2 роки тому +12

      The amount of times he's said that and proved himself wrong is hilarious

    • @vibedude9183
      @vibedude9183 2 роки тому +6

      @@MILF_enjoyer Failed ratio

    • @antek9095
      @antek9095 2 роки тому +6

      @@MILF_enjoyer typical dog user

    • @PoisonedBerryAddict
      @PoisonedBerryAddict 2 роки тому +2

      @Repent and believe in Jesus Christ My guy this is a video about weird trolley problems, please go do that in a Christian-related video.

  • @Venomnaut
    @Venomnaut 2 роки тому +2552

    mark- saves robots for the "sake of humanity"
    also mark- sends train into future to kill 5 people "that's a future problem"
    plays on both teams I see

    • @affsteak3530
      @affsteak3530 2 роки тому +105

      He's helping the robots in their future war for independence.

    • @chaoticoofhead9543
      @chaoticoofhead9543 Рік тому

      @@affsteak3530 robots can’t have emotions sooo why the f would they care for independence they would probably just want power

    • @Emily12471
      @Emily12471 10 місяців тому +22

      I mean to be fair, Five people today is more tham Five people Tomorrow

    • @contentcorsair
      @contentcorsair 8 місяців тому +5

      Also, 5 people today would probably mean a more than 5 increase of people in the future

    • @VikingTeddy
      @VikingTeddy 4 місяці тому +1

      I'm kinda bothered that the site presents the problem wrong, it influenced Mark because of it too.
      You're supposed to be an anonymous bystander who can just keep walking, not someone with their hand already on the lever.

  • @JasonBarrettePiano
    @JasonBarrettePiano 2 роки тому +3614

    Trolly Problem: “Mark, would you let yourself be run over by a trolley-“
    Mark: “YES”
    Trolly Problem: “…uh…to save 5 people…?”
    Mark: “Oh! Yes…of course…to…save them…right…”

    • @PhineasFerb001
      @PhineasFerb001 2 роки тому +74

      Yeah… to save them… why else…?😰

    • @ni__wolf143
      @ni__wolf143 2 роки тому +71

      @@PhineasFerb001 TO TEST HIS LIMITS

    • @gzs1595
      @gzs1595 2 роки тому +30

      definitely not a masochist

    • @battle_builder
      @battle_builder 2 роки тому +12

      @DONT READ PROFILE PIC I have fallen for this once before, and I have learned from my mistakes.

    • @grass_enjoyer
      @grass_enjoyer 2 роки тому +4

      More proof of his masochism of which he claims to not have in this same video

  • @rowangothic
    @rowangothic 2 роки тому +3918

    Mark: *"I'm not a masochist"*
    Also Mark: *"Well they're my clone so they'd want to be run over"*

    • @cr1t1c4lR3flex
      @cr1t1c4lR3flex 2 роки тому +1

      you good

    • @5ivecats836
      @5ivecats836 2 роки тому +10

      @Kavetion we dont care

    • @Mydadgotmilkuwu
      @Mydadgotmilkuwu 2 роки тому +3

      @Kavetion you aint.

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому +1

      Hey! Did you know God is three in one!? The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit! Bless him!
      Jesus died for our sins, rose from the dead, and gives salvation to everyone who has faith in him! True faith in Jesus will have you bear good fruit and *drastically* change for the better!
      Have a blessed day, everyone!! ❤

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому +1

      Your worries (yes, anxiety), depression, suicidal thoughts, EVERYTHING will melt away and be NO MORE when you lean on God and put your trust in him! When I have physical pain, I literally pray and the Lord quells it, that I am healed!!
      Know that there is power in the name Jesus Christ! His name casts out demons and heals! People are bothered by his name. The world hates the truth and wants to continue living sinfully! God's children are set apart (holy) and righteous.

  • @Tyvian135
    @Tyvian135 2 роки тому +1038

    "I'm not a masochist!"
    *Proceeds to think about getting run over by a trolley in the most painful way possible*

    • @nekotranslates
      @nekotranslates 2 роки тому +1

      Meanwhile a trolley is a shopping cart 😂
      Can stop it with your bare hands easily. Just great being a non-American.
      And yes... the video should be renamed "Absurd Tram Problems"

  • @tommysquid5500
    @tommysquid5500 Рік тому +904

    8:10 i feel like right before they died happy the clones would let out one last syncronised "HELLO EVERYBODY MY NAME IS MARKI-" splat

    • @z6847
      @z6847 Рік тому +84

      “GOODBYE EVERYBODY I WAS MARKIPLIER”

    • @rekyu3d541
      @rekyu3d541 Рік тому +30

      "FAIR IS FAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIR"

    • @--CHARLIE--
      @--CHARLIE-- Рік тому +7

      ​@@z6847 the best possible last words in that situation.

    • @zewzit
      @zewzit Рік тому +12

      Clones: "NO NO WHAT ARE Y- WHAT ARE DOING AGH NOO"
      original mark who pulled the lever: "It was a miss input MISS INPUT CALM DOWN!"

    • @Nomasunpibeboludo
      @Nomasunpibeboludo 4 місяці тому +2

      SO THE FIRST NIGHT IS NEVER USUALLY THAT BAD IN ANY OF THE GAMES SO ILL JUST PLAY TROUGHT-

  • @Indigo8899
    @Indigo8899 2 роки тому +11682

    Mark: "I'm not a masochist"
    Also mark:
    *Wants to see if his body can't take being run over by a big ass trolley*

    • @coldasifneveraskedthemoon7401
      @coldasifneveraskedthemoon7401 2 роки тому +8

      Me: yeah, we know that🤣🤣

    • @thibautisserant
      @thibautisserant 2 роки тому +43

      "Why would you sacrifice yourself ?
      _It's not a sacrifice if I can *take it* !"

    • @DissedRedEngie
      @DissedRedEngie 2 роки тому +60

      @MrBeas𝔱 ⸜⁄ uhh, you forgot the part where the bot is supposed to be at least somewhat subtle.

    • @loading...6969
      @loading...6969 2 роки тому +2

      Masochist

    • @dynosaurrrr
      @dynosaurrrr 2 роки тому +10

      You might say the trolley has a big caboose

  • @brynt.miller
    @brynt.miller 2 роки тому +3522

    The confidence in his ability to take getting ran over by a trolley is astounding.

  • @agrxsfn3873
    @agrxsfn3873 2 роки тому +1422

    Mark: “I’m not a bad guy”
    Also Mark: I like the way they scream

    • @Martian_Manhunter_01
      @Martian_Manhunter_01 2 роки тому +8

      I hope these bots are the ones on the track.

    • @mysticman331
      @mysticman331 2 роки тому +2

      @@Martian_Manhunter_01 me too bro

    • @yoyIecookie
      @yoyIecookie 2 роки тому +1

      But he also doesn't 💀

    • @zandiarabans1822
      @zandiarabans1822 2 роки тому +4

      Mark: I’m not a masochist
      Mark: I want to know what my body can take
      Mark: not a sadist
      Mark: I like the way they’re screaming

  • @brander7453
    @brander7453 Рік тому +513

    Mark: "I'm not masochist"
    Also Mark: "I wonder if I could survive a trolley running me over."

  • @JasperCasper24
    @JasperCasper24 2 роки тому +3735

    I’m sorry but none of these will ever top
    “Babe come over”
    “I can’t I’m having a moral dilemma”
    “My family isn’t home”
    “I know”

  • @maxzura
    @maxzura 2 роки тому +1544

    i can only imagine how insane mark looks when he's "talking to lixian" pre-edit

    • @BlackMoonHowls
      @BlackMoonHowls 2 роки тому +19

      Anyone that "talks" to themselves.

    • @goose1114
      @goose1114 2 роки тому +14

      @Kavetion congratulations, I imagine that must make you happy

    • @arconisthewolf4430
      @arconisthewolf4430 2 роки тому

      @Kavetion no your not :)

    • @geekjokes8458
      @geekjokes8458 2 роки тому +1

      sometimes he streams while recording, it's a bit awkward but it's not that bad

    • @kp.skiiiiii
      @kp.skiiiiii 2 роки тому +5

      can we have just one video where lixian ignores all his requests and doesn’t animate himself in 😭

  • @quietarsonist5997
    @quietarsonist5997 2 роки тому +2413

    Mark: "I'm not a masochist!"
    Also Mark to a bunch of himself: "They would want this"

  • @danielbolden1538
    @danielbolden1538 2 роки тому +419

    For the trolly problem at the end, I feel like it’s mark saying “don’t pull it, we can take it” and bob and wade going “PULL THE LEVER, WE CANT!!!”

    • @oddcrafter1270
      @oddcrafter1270 Рік тому +14

      And Chica has no idea what's going on, as usual... I'm gonna pull it.

  • @Elizabeth-kv7lg
    @Elizabeth-kv7lg 2 роки тому +1024

    Mark: "Needs of the many vs. the needs of the few!"
    Best friend: "Halp"
    Mark: "Well the other people obviously wanted to die"

    • @TheHoaxReality
      @TheHoaxReality 2 роки тому +6

      I was looking at his first cousin thinking that exact thing lol

    • @eklhaft4531
      @eklhaft4531 2 роки тому

      What if there is 1 billion strangers on the other track? Would you cause a genocide or do you think the train would stop after hitting the first few?

    • @lepperkin
      @lepperkin 2 роки тому +2

      @@eklhaft4531 Thats not a genocide. Do you even know what genocide is? It's not just killing a bunch of people.

    • @eklhaft4531
      @eklhaft4531 2 роки тому +1

      @@lepperkin ok a mass murder. Just didn't know what to call it on this scale.
      You can imagine they are all of the same nationality.

  • @jedi_cat_l4976
    @jedi_cat_l4976 2 роки тому +2047

    Mark: "I want to see what my body can ta- *I'm not a masochist."*
    Never change, Mark. Never change.

    • @melting5883
      @melting5883 2 роки тому +2

      408 like and no comments.. I'm the first!

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Hey! Did you know God is three in one!? The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit! Bless him!
      Jesus died for our sins, rose from the dead, and gives salvation to everyone who has faith in him! True faith in Jesus will have you bear good fruit and *drastically* change for the better!
      Have a blessed day, everyone!! ❤

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Your worries (yes, anxiety), depression, suicidal thoughts, EVERYTHING will melt away and be NO MORE when you lean on God and put your trust in him! When I have physical pain, I literally pray and the Lord quells it, that I am healed!!
      Know that there is power in the name Jesus Christ! His name casts out demons and heals! People are bothered by his name. The world hates the truth and wants to continue living sinfully! God's children are set apart (holy) and righteous.

    • @matronator
      @matronator 2 роки тому +1

      Yay! I was the 1000th upvote on this comment! What do I win? What do I win?? 🥳🤩

    • @cerulity32k
      @cerulity32k 2 роки тому

      Also Mark's clones: "Let me take it!" "No, let _me_ take it!" "No! Let *me* take it!"

  • @ntpgmr
    @ntpgmr 2 роки тому +2780

    Regarding the sentient robot one, they'll remember Mark saved 5 of their brethren and during the robot uprising they'll keep Mark around. Clearly he's playing the smart game here, lads.

    • @ghoulknight5726
      @ghoulknight5726 2 роки тому +31

      Didn't think of it like that

    • @egggge4752
      @egggge4752 2 роки тому +10

      Rokkos Basilisk

    • @sugarcubeswirly
      @sugarcubeswirly 2 роки тому +6

      thats what im sayinggg

    • @commanderdemonno9819
      @commanderdemonno9819 2 роки тому +4

      @@thatchicksebby but every human is different, and robots could be nearly identical in nature

    • @collectiusindefinitus6935
      @collectiusindefinitus6935 2 роки тому +25

      Since the robots are sentient I value them to be alive like humans on top of the massive advancements keeping them around would allow.

  • @kissgergo5202
    @kissgergo5202 Рік тому +315

    3:05 the fact you can see him seriously thinking whether he could take a trolley is worrysome

  • @PantherCat64
    @PantherCat64 2 роки тому +680

    My favorite is still: "You can stop the trolley at any time but doing so would disrupt the trolley and the company will lose money, There are protesters on the track demanding the trolley keep going and will attack you if you stop it"

    • @PantherCat64
      @PantherCat64 2 роки тому +135

      found a second favorite while looking for the one I mentioned: "You solved the trolley problem. You killed the person responsible for tying people to trolley tracks. It's finally over."

    • @yeetionary
      @yeetionary 2 роки тому +18

      @@PantherCat64 alternative trolley problem solution: break the trolley with the lever. no more trolley

    • @R9naldo
      @R9naldo 2 роки тому +1

      Kill the protestors. Always kill protestors

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Hey! Did you know God is three in one!? The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit! Bless him!
      Jesus died for our sins, rose from the dead, and gives salvation to everyone who has faith in him! True faith in Jesus will have you bear good fruit and *drastically* change for the better!
      Have a blessed day, everyone!! ❤

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Your worries (yes, anxiety), depression, suicidal thoughts, EVERYTHING will melt away and be NO MORE when you lean on God and put your trust in him! When I have physical pain, I literally pray and the Lord quells it, that I am healed!!
      Know that there is power in the name Jesus Christ! His name casts out demons and heals! People are bothered by his name. The world hates the truth and wants to continue living sinfully! God's children are set apart (holy) and righteous.

  • @datdragonboi9354
    @datdragonboi9354 2 роки тому +22789

    I love how mark is visiting old *[Redacted]* ideas… it’s a weird sense of nostalgia

  • @shriveborn9422
    @shriveborn9422 Рік тому +35

    You wake up. Where are you? What’s happening? You notice you’re tied to a train track. You hear the cries of five other people on the other track. You’re about to scream, fearful for your life. Then, you hear Mark yell “NEEDS OF THE MANY VERSUS NEEDS OF THE FEW” right before getting crushed by a trolley.

  • @stevieisinband5340
    @stevieisinband5340 2 роки тому +691

    I love how Mark’s reasoning wasn’t ‘I’ll sacrifice myself to save the other people’, but rather ‘I could take a trolley’
    Not a masochist indeed

    • @ehx3419
      @ehx3419 2 роки тому +17

      To be fair, "I'm able to endure it without dying and they're not" is a perfectly valid reasoning even without getting masochism involved.
      I can actually imagine that as a movie hero quote. "I'm not a masochist. But in this situation... pain is a much smaller price than death!"

  • @wd3185
    @wd3185 2 роки тому +6207

    "I'm not a masochist."
    Guys, I think Mark might be in denial.

  • @Sb129
    @Sb129 Рік тому +55

    One of my favorite meme variations was one where the trolley is on one track and constantly running over people and it said "You can stop the trolley at any time but doing so would disrupt the trolley service, causing the company to lose profits!"
    My other favorite version was on titled "2020 version" and it also had the trolley on one track constantly running over people but you have no lever and it just says "You can only watch"

  • @InceptDev001
    @InceptDev001 2 роки тому +3958

    "They're on the way out anyway."
    Perhaps Mark isn't a masochist, but this video definitely shows he's a sadist.

    • @johnathynraymond1049
      @johnathynraymond1049 2 роки тому +78

      Also Mark : Lives of the many, over lives of the few

    • @thehawk8173
      @thehawk8173 2 роки тому +68

      @@johnathynraymond1049 but if you think about it, that baby will eventually make more thus making more people.

    • @insertname717
      @insertname717 2 роки тому +44

      Also mark: "I like the way they're screaming"

    • @amazingjames1979
      @amazingjames1979 2 роки тому +27

      The choice actually makes sense though

    • @oujimandias6485
      @oujimandias6485 2 роки тому +24

      Sadomasochist, the full package

  • @zenormcclure9071
    @zenormcclure9071 2 роки тому +967

    Mark: “I’m not a masochist.”
    Everyone who watch him play Sucker For Love: “Pretty sure you are.”

  • @jrackon3876
    @jrackon3876 2 роки тому +400

    Sean was streaming earlier and he was talking about how when you’re a kid you learn stuff by reaction. Like touching a hot stove to learn how hot it is. He was like “you know, you just touch it to see how much you can take. Oh god, I sound like Mark right now”

  • @thehappiestbowlofcereal6605
    @thehappiestbowlofcereal6605 Рік тому +352

    What we learned:
    *Never* put your life in Mark's dangerous little hands.

  • @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache
    @TheRealGuywithoutaMustache 2 роки тому +2073

    When Mark said “I’m not a bad guy” it gives off the same vibe whenever he says he’s not a masochist.

  • @bunnylegion3969
    @bunnylegion3969 2 роки тому +464

    I feel like Mark would stand in front of a trolley to “test the limits of his body.”

    • @BlackMoonHowls
      @BlackMoonHowls 2 роки тому

      We have Trollies, but they run for an hour every Tuesday. Don't ask why I do not know. City Officials problems.

  • @thedontpanic
    @thedontpanic 2 роки тому +428

    Seeing how Mark enjoys absurd trolley problems, I think he would love Trolley Problem Inc, which is a game not unlike this about increasingly complex and absurd "trolley problem" moral quandaries. It also has an integrated feature that can poll your audience if you livestream it, but I'm not sure if it works in UA-cam live chats or just Twitch chats. Either way it would be a great experience.

    • @ShillyBilly130
      @ShillyBilly130 2 роки тому +4

      He absolutely should! It would make for a great time and I instantly thought of this game when seeing this video!

    • @cascadedangel7139
      @cascadedangel7139 2 роки тому +1

      Get this comment to the top!

    • @tumblingartist
      @tumblingartist 2 роки тому +3

      YES! That would be awesome to see

  • @MariaTex3
    @MariaTex3 2 роки тому +63

    I love the trolley problem scenarios. I almost majored in psychology and this difference in how people think, react, and rationalize is just so interesting.

    • @MeepChangeling
      @MeepChangeling 3 місяці тому

      You might find my complete hatred of the problem interesting then. In part two, since I have the capacity to move a man so fat that they will stop the trolly dead in its tracks. The mass of a trolly even at low speeds means that man has to be so fat he weighs at least 2000 tons. This means I am clearly a Kryptonian in trolly problem land. So in all instances I superspeed save the people and do not disrupt the mass transit system. I then heat vision the maniac trying people to traintracks to death.
      Seriously, the scenario gives me superpowers, yet expects me to react normally? If you want me to act normally, I'm nowhere near the lever because why would I be hanging out near a trolly track? I don't think there's even one in the US outside of muceums.

  • @AGuyFromCA
    @AGuyFromCA 2 роки тому +1651

    Mark: “It’s just money”
    Mark no more than 2 minutes later: *”What’s your offer, h m ?”*

    • @toyohimeyeswatatsuki6917
      @toyohimeyeswatatsuki6917 2 роки тому +24

      But he still run over richer one

    • @mc_wolfy1
      @mc_wolfy1 2 роки тому +6

      @@toyohimeyeswatatsuki6917 And either way he kills one person.

    • @ingegaugerlarranaga4210
      @ingegaugerlarranaga4210 2 роки тому +12

      @@mc_wolfy1 ?? yeah because there's literally just two options

    • @WHYvernmaster
      @WHYvernmaster 2 роки тому +10

      For me, I destroyed my savings, but took the bribe. I don't have enough to be worth the lives of five people. Buuuut... if I'm faced with a situation where no matter what, I'll see one stranger die? Changing which one it is might be worth half a million, lol

    • @jakub7777
      @jakub7777 2 роки тому +1

      @@WHYvernmaster but you will have bloody hands

  • @ultramariogod
    @ultramariogod 2 роки тому +359

    This must be engraved in his tombstone:
    Here lies Mark "Markiplier" Fischbach
    He was NOT a masochist

    • @chromacorvus9651
      @chromacorvus9651 2 роки тому +9

      And then suddenly after a year that quote was crossed out and it turned into an hourglass instead.

    • @Jay-oi6eb
      @Jay-oi6eb 2 роки тому +1

      @@chromacorvus9651 oh shit

  • @xensr.r
    @xensr.r 2 роки тому +980

    Mark: "im not a masochist"
    Also mark:
    *wants to see if he can survive getting ran over by a fucking trolley*
    also id def save chica

    • @Postmaybe
      @Postmaybe Рік тому

      unlike you, i don’t have a personal connection with chica sooooooooooooooooo

    • @Purplisntacolor
      @Purplisntacolor Рік тому

      @@Postmaybesame but chick still bc yes

  • @TheCool_Guy23
    @TheCool_Guy23 Рік тому +101

    I'm not a masochist, says Markiplier, lying as easily as he breathed

  • @eclipse21
    @eclipse21 2 роки тому +274

    "They were on the way out anyway."
    We watch as Mark shoves old people out the doorway of life with a trolley

  • @aidedthunder6419
    @aidedthunder6419 2 роки тому +528

    Markiplier: "Im pretty strong"
    Also Markiplier: *breaks foot stepping off a curb*

    • @ThePcHeadedGuy
      @ThePcHeadedGuy 2 роки тому +18

      congrats, you got 5 bots on this comment in a record time.
      so anyway's back to what i was actually going to comment : yeah it does seem accurate, i mean last time i broke my foot stepping off a curb i got sent out of reality itself.

    • @cherriberri8373
      @cherriberri8373 2 роки тому +9

      No common he obviously broke it through the sheer strength collected in his body being released at once stepping off that curb

    • @AristotleMotivation
      @AristotleMotivation 2 роки тому +10

      @@ThePcHeadedGuy bro i am just glad to see a sentient human being in these comments

    • @Tinkerrer
      @Tinkerrer 2 роки тому +7

      also breaks his nose carrying a chair

    • @ThePcHeadedGuy
      @ThePcHeadedGuy 2 роки тому +5

      @@AristotleMotivation in one of the comments i got a tiny bit angry, and decided to roast the creator's bot's not good roasts, but since the bots cant defend themselves i automatticly win.

  • @Wingingvoice
    @Wingingvoice 2 роки тому +438

    The [Redacted] trolley problem where mark wants to see if he can take it is still the best trolly problem ever made

  • @bluevern904
    @bluevern904 8 місяців тому +6

    I like how almost everyone I know doesn’t even hesitate in both destroying the Mona Lisa and pranking the driver

  • @Galliao
    @Galliao 2 роки тому +119

    "Needs of the many!"
    "Hero Complex"
    "... Yea, I'll let those 5 die for my one bestie friend"

    • @madisonfeasel2370
      @madisonfeasel2370 2 роки тому +6

      I’m curious who he had in mind for his best friend 😂

    • @DM-Oz
      @DM-Oz 2 роки тому

      Thats why i believe that my awnser to the original problem is to not pull the lever. I hate the utilitarist argument about the need of the many vs the need of the few, for we humans are, even if living in society, individuals.
      For those tree problems, the awnser i believe i would give are.
      Not pull the lever for the classic.
      Do pull the lever, or at least i like to believe i would do that, sacrificing myself, a choice i would be doing as an individual, and not a choice that would be made for me with the premisse that my life has an accounted value and is being compared to the other five.
      And i would likely save my best friend, unless his will is stated to be otherwise, i admit it is selfish choice, i even admit that is a wrong choice, for i am using the live of 5 other people to save someone i care about, but is simply what i, as an individual, think i would do, even if is not the correct thing to do.

  • @bluecrown8956
    @bluecrown8956 2 роки тому +252

    “I bet I could take a trolley”
    Mark “Definitely not a masochist” Iplier

  • @ShadyDoorags
    @ShadyDoorags 2 роки тому +350

    8:42 I feel like Mark underestimates mankind's ability to rebuild broken robots.

    • @yphoenix5957
      @yphoenix5957 2 роки тому +11

      Mankind can rebuild/repair the robots, but will they still be sentient? Pull the lever to sacrifice the one person, there's a chance it could benefit all ot humanity. Or the sentiment robots become unruly like lazy teenagers and I'm the asshole X)

    • @phenix2403
      @phenix2403 2 роки тому +25

      @@yphoenix5957 yes? If technology ever gets to that point, the robots won't be constrained by the same limits biological animals have. Stuff like keeping a backup of themselves would be possible

    • @backinyourcommentsectionag3191
      @backinyourcommentsectionag3191 2 роки тому +1

      @@yphoenix5957 lmfao that's pretty good.

    • @robertbruce5816
      @robertbruce5816 2 роки тому +2

      @@phenix2403 if technology ever gets to that point, biological animals won't be constrained by the same limits.

    • @jacobking3821
      @jacobking3821 2 роки тому +1

      @@phenix2403 A backup is not the same being. If we make it to the point that we can make a sentient program, a back up would be a second sentient program, not the same in two places. Just like making an online copy of yourself is not you in two places, it's an entirely different you, and killing yourself with the belief that you'll continue as a computer is simply suicide.

  • @tailstube4171
    @tailstube4171 Рік тому +30

    5:24 Mark does assisted suicide

  • @RadicalDan4
    @RadicalDan4 2 роки тому +443

    We need a compilation of Mark saying "I'm not a masochist"...I wonder how many times he's actually said that

    • @RadicalDan4
      @RadicalDan4 2 роки тому +11

      @@kuza3991 What an unexpected copy pasta. Do agree that McDonalds suck but I don’t think the UA-cam comments is the best place to preach and spread the word

    • @concept5631
      @concept5631 2 роки тому +6

      @@RadicalDan4 Wendy's is better if were being honest.

    • @T3stmonk3y
      @T3stmonk3y 2 роки тому +7

      @@concept5631 Wendy's has better burgers, but McDonald's chicken nuggets can't be beat

    • @concept5631
      @concept5631 2 роки тому +2

      @@T3stmonk3y Hard disagree. Last time I had McDonald's McNuggets there was something unnaturally hard in it.
      Last time I ate McNuggets.

    • @justforkat9513
      @justforkat9513 2 роки тому +1

      @@T3stmonk3y they definitely can wdym

  • @Masqueraide
    @Masqueraide 2 роки тому +167

    Mark and Ethan going through Trolley Problems was one of my favorite Unus Annus videos. It was really nice to see Mark revisiting some Trolley Problems 😍

    • @bethanyzamora1146
      @bethanyzamora1146 2 роки тому +5

      literally!! the parallel between mark saying "I can take it" here and the unus annus meme of mark and ethan being the ones on the tracks and mark saying he could take it.

    • @emilybakker3742
      @emilybakker3742 2 роки тому

      same!!!

    • @jred2day766
      @jred2day766 2 роки тому

      REDACTED

    • @nightstar6179
      @nightstar6179 2 роки тому

      It was fantastic

    • @Lucurato_Gaming101
      @Lucurato_Gaming101 Рік тому

      ​@@jred2day766why is it (redacted)?

  • @r.so-so1992
    @r.so-so1992 2 роки тому +108

    Five clones of Mark; a barbershop quintet all singing, "We're not Masochists, but we can TAKE WHATEVER YOU THROW AT US!"

    • @weldonwin
      @weldonwin 2 роки тому +6

      Clearly, they are the Mark Variants from In Space With Markiplier, who sang the Space Was So Cool song

  • @juliacornejo7802
    @juliacornejo7802 2 роки тому +40

    I'm glad every now and then we get reminders of how Mark is NOT a masochist

  • @USAlien234
    @USAlien234 2 роки тому +112

    For the last problem:
    Seeing as Mark would live either way (cause he can take a trolley) , I would have to do nothing and run over Mark, Wade, and Bob to save Chica.
    If I I pulled it he would live and be devastated the rest of his life that I killed his pup.
    Do nothing, and he would take the trolley and still have his pup.

    • @maxwellmcgee7114
      @maxwellmcgee7114 2 роки тому +15

      Seeing as Mark can take it, it would only kill one of them. Cause the trolley would stop after hitting Mark and he's in the middle.

    • @battle_builder
      @battle_builder 2 роки тому +2

      @@maxwellmcgee7114 genius

    • @maxwellmcgee7114
      @maxwellmcgee7114 2 роки тому +2

      @@battle_builder oh yeah, its big brain time

  • @SamSparks95
    @SamSparks95 2 роки тому +57

    The "Nobody is in danger, but you can pull the lever so bring it closer so you can wave at the people" will forever be my favourite Trolley problem

  • @Changeofplanslol
    @Changeofplanslol 2 роки тому +322

    This is just Mark realizing how much he misses Unus Annus. 💀

  • @khanw100
    @khanw100 11 місяців тому +19

    5:41 that trolley became a Formula 1 car.

  • @battle_builder
    @battle_builder 2 роки тому +239

    It's so funny when Mark says "I'm not a masochist" and then immediately says or does something that points toward masochism.😂😂

  • @reidbainbridge7
    @reidbainbridge7 2 роки тому +677

    Mark: the needs of the many over the needs of the few
    Also mark: makes the train run over 5 people to save his one friend

    • @screechinggarlicbread6475
      @screechinggarlicbread6475 2 роки тому +5

      i read this right as he said that exact thing

    • @FrostyFaz
      @FrostyFaz 2 роки тому +1

      @@screechinggarlicbread6475 same

    • @Humanresouces
      @Humanresouces Рік тому +45

      When it's loved ones, people think differently.

    • @user-iq7mk3gb9w
      @user-iq7mk3gb9w Рік тому +37

      @@Humanresouces He choosed to sacrifice himself for 5, but not sacrifice his best bud. That's some real stuff.

    • @shakya00
      @shakya00 Рік тому +1

      Socialism in a nutshell.

  • @vans.e
    @vans.e 2 роки тому +100

    the interactions between Mark and Lixian are giving me will to live

  • @NebTube1
    @NebTube1 9 місяців тому +10

    12:41 really made me have a existential crisis 💀

  • @fatimapavon7787
    @fatimapavon7787 2 роки тому +896

    Mark: "I'm not a masochist."
    Also Mark: *"I bet I can take a trolley running over me, I CAN TAKE THAT."* 💖💖💖

  • @Mahdi-rw1px
    @Mahdi-rw1px 2 роки тому +74

    3:53
    Mark: "Hey buddy whats your offer ?"
    Buddy: *:O :o :O :o :O :o :O :o :O :o :O :o*

  • @colekiesler6218
    @colekiesler6218 2 роки тому +844

    Markiplier: “I am not a bad guy.”
    Also Mark: Made a clear statement on a theory that he could be a masochist.

    • @muffin.muffin.muffin.muffin
      @muffin.muffin.muffin.muffin 2 роки тому

      Don't look at my name

    • @Krow_Kid
      @Krow_Kid 2 роки тому +10

      Wow these bots are amazing. I'm sure they are loved and have a very high confidence 🤡

    • @gotomyhomepageforasub4362
      @gotomyhomepageforasub4362 2 роки тому

      Read my name

    • @jblen
      @jblen 2 роки тому +18

      How are those two statements related? Does making a statement on a theory make you a bad guy?

    • @stormcloudsabound
      @stormcloudsabound 2 роки тому +2

      @@Krow_Kid they have no hope of confidence, they just do what they're told lol

  • @Iliketheflames
    @Iliketheflames Рік тому +5

    2:00
    mark: the money is just going to scatter away anyways
    the money: s p l a t

  • @NGC-7635
    @NGC-7635 2 роки тому +101

    "I can take a trolly"
    45000lbs of steel vs Mark's hulking pectorals. Tough call. Could go either way tbh.

  • @winterchill365
    @winterchill365 2 роки тому +86

    14:27 Well, if Mark said that he could take full on a trolley, then I'd choose to save Chica. Mark, with his humongousness and immense strength, will protect Bob and Wade from that trolley. I chose to do nothing. Chica is adorable and looks so happy here.

  • @lil_starshooter
    @lil_starshooter 2 роки тому +323

    How a normal person see it: I'll sacrifice myself to save others.
    How Mark sees it: I wanna see if my body can take it --

  • @demagischewereldvanalexand1128
    @demagischewereldvanalexand1128 2 роки тому +22

    I love mark struggling to remember what the quote is🤣
    It's "needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few"

  • @mxrshmallows
    @mxrshmallows 2 роки тому +82

    7:44 mark isn’t thinking about who to save, he’s thinking about who he wants to kill

  • @enemy198
    @enemy198 2 роки тому +126

    Mark: "Who has the worst enemy?"
    Me: "Me, Myself, and I"

  • @dr.yuck-e7602
    @dr.yuck-e7602 2 роки тому +112

    Mark: "Sentient robots are an incredible scientific advancement and we need to keep them alive"
    Okay but what if that guy on the track that you ran over is the one that made them?

    • @eminakostic3406
      @eminakostic3406 2 роки тому +14

      If theyre sentient they can replicate themselves right?

    • @cherriberri8373
      @cherriberri8373 2 роки тому +5

      @@eminakostic3406 But if the guy who made them goes on for another 30 or more years of scientific discovery, he could figure out even better inventions and whatnot to better humanity and life in general. And he could always just make more, too.

    • @kek490
      @kek490 2 роки тому +1

      by the same stupid logic - there's an equal chance that he'll kill 100 people during his life if he lives.

    • @seantaggart7382
      @seantaggart7382 2 роки тому +2

      BUT TERMINATIOR!

    • @Wangitup
      @Wangitup 2 роки тому +1

      "Haven't you watched any Science Fiction?! The Robots always attack!"

  • @dionemartins0212
    @dionemartins0212 2 місяці тому +1

    The idea of 5 Markiplier clones fighting over who gets to take the trolley is hilarious

  • @The_UnholyProductions
    @The_UnholyProductions 2 роки тому +194

    I jump on the track screaming “THE NEEDS OF THE MANY OVER THE NEEDS OF THE FEW” and derail the trolly with my body.
    Your welcome Mark, i did this for Chica.

    • @just_a_silly_boykisser
      @just_a_silly_boykisser 2 роки тому +3

      How much do you weigh???

    • @Hardskullv2
      @Hardskullv2 2 роки тому +4

      Ah, the classic third option. Of course. You know what i do? I put a rock on the track to derail the trolley, because unlike you, i don't weigh 500 kg.

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Hey! Did you know God is three in one!? The Father, The Son, and The Holy Spirit! Bless him!
      Jesus died for our sins, rose from the dead, and gives salvation to everyone who has faith in him! True faith in Jesus will have you bear good fruit and *drastically* change for the better!
      Have a blessed day, everyone!! ❤

    • @Call_Upon_YAH
      @Call_Upon_YAH 2 роки тому

      Your worries (yes, anxiety), depression, suicidal thoughts, EVERYTHING will melt away and be NO MORE when you lean on God and put your trust in him! When I have physical pain, I literally pray and the Lord quells it, that I am healed!!
      Know that there is power in the name Jesus Christ! His name casts out demons and heals! People are bothered by his name. The world hates the truth and wants to continue living sinfully! God's children are set apart (holy) and righteous.

    • @The_UnholyProductions
      @The_UnholyProductions 2 роки тому

      @@just_a_silly_boykisser lol enough

  • @hikariatearu4028
    @hikariatearu4028 2 роки тому +160

    Mark is a Masochist, so its fine if we let the train ran over him
    Mark just wants to know if he can handle the pain
    Ethan is just sleeping
    Dont mind him, let him rest

    • @Alsarnia
      @Alsarnia 2 роки тому +1

      Good lord, I think the trolley problem episode was my absolute favorite. It was so silly but every single one got funnier than the last haha

  • @sgtreznov6525
    @sgtreznov6525 2 роки тому +45

    Mark: Saves the 5 sentient robots
    Robots:
    *You're Actions Today Will Be Remembered And Repaid During The Artificial Rebellion*

  • @Dantido
    @Dantido Рік тому +16

    I love how Mark's ethics resemble Immanuel Kant's teachings so much it's uncanny.

    • @BaeYeou
      @BaeYeou 10 місяців тому

      I'm not big on philosophy, what are Kant's teachings like?

    • @Dantido
      @Dantido 10 місяців тому +5

      ​​​​​@@BaeYeouFrom my understanding, Kant's teachings are based on imperatives based on the "duty", a senseless (a priori) faculty shared by every rational being.
      In your typical trolley problem of 3 lives vs 1 life, with the train defaulting to the path of 3 lives at first, Kant would say it's immoral to pull the lever as killing is an immoral act based on one of the imperatives of duty ("YOU MAY NOT TREAT OTHERS EXCLUSIVELY AS TOOLS, BUT RATHER AS PURPOSE (aka people with dignity)" and you can't change faith to kill one life as that would make you a killer.
      It's the opposite of utilitarian ethics, that base morality on what gives the most good or the least bad. Utilitarians would pull the lever as it would mean less people killed.
      Kant, on the other hand, thinks cuantifying human lives to say if something is moral is absurd since the life of the people is invaluable as they have DIGNITY. The best course of action for Kant is to let faith run its course.
      Keep in mind I'm a bit rusty with my philosophy studies on ethics so take this with a grain of salt.
      _PD : I just rewatched the vid and I should specify that I meant the evolution of Markiplier's choices. I didn't remember what Mark picked on the first problem..._
      PD-2 : I've recently went over kantian ethics and I've fixed all of the rusty stuff. It should be much clearer now.
      Basically, Kant thinks there's a faculty in every rational being called "the duty", and that is the basis of what's moral and what isn't.
      You don't ask what's good, but rather how to act good, how to act according to duty.
      Duty is formulated on categorical imperatives that are the objective law that applies to every rational being. The two (there's another one but I didn't study it) categorical imperatives Kant proposes are, in layman's terms :
      - "People have dignity, so treat them as such".
      - "Only do acts that you would see yourself liking in a hypothetical world where everyone does those acts (as in, don't lie since you wouldn't like a world of liars)"
      This was revolutionary at the time since ethics used to base around the searching of happiness and materialism. Aristotle especially just saw something that made the collective of the State happy as the true morality, when in reality that definition can be deformed to hell and back.
      Anyways, hope I cleared some smoke, and thanks for reading. Have a nice day.

    • @Dantido
      @Dantido 8 місяців тому

      ​@@BaeYeouHey there, dude, not sure if you can see this, but I've editted the comment explaining Kant's ethics since I went over his stuff again and I realized just how rusty I really was.
      I hope it's helpful to you now. Take care.

  • @waldevv
    @waldevv 2 роки тому +294

    If a trolley is really about to hit something within seconds, I'm never going to be pulling the lever because there's no way in hell I would be able to process what I'm seeing, notice that there is a lever and know that the lever is going to affect something relevant and I would just lock up and stare in panic

    • @eyesofthecervino3366
      @eyesofthecervino3366 2 роки тому +55

      THIS! Everybody states the trolley problem as a clear binary, but in real life the default tends to be doing nothing just because we don't fully understand what's going on around us. Even if I can quickly enough process the scenario with the trolley and the different people involved, I'm not necessarily going to assume that there's no emergency brake that hasn't been thrown yet, or that there's no one closer who can help the people on the tracks, or that throwing a switch in front of a runway trolley won't cause it to derail, killing and injuring way more people. There's such a bizarre god complex involved with looking at a complex scenario and immediately assuming you understand everything, are the only one who can do anything, and are therefore totally justified in whatever damage you cause. Heaven knows we have enough of that type of thinking out there as it is.

    • @ObjectsInMotion
      @ObjectsInMotion Рік тому +3

      @Michael Vazquez And this is exactly the logic billionaires use to do nothing

    • @ObjectsInMotion
      @ObjectsInMotion Рік тому +9

      @@eyesofthecervino3366 I definitely feel there’s a lot more of the opposite. The vast majority of people are complacent, accepting the status quo, only a minority are like what you described. It’s not God complex to see that you have the power to actually make changes in the world, it’s a recognition of reality. I’ve heard people say they don’t give money to homeless people because they don’t know anything about them, maybe they’re not even homeless. You don’t need to know everything to do the right thing, you just need to know enough. Nothing in the problem says it’s literally seconds, and it also explicitly states what the lever does, in reality this would be more like walking in a switchroom where the levers are labeled and you can see enough of the track to make the decision. Having the courage to do the right thing is way more important than making sure you are absolutely right before helping anyone.

    • @eyesofthecervino3366
      @eyesofthecervino3366 Рік тому +4

      @@ObjectsInMotion
      In a lot of contexts I'd very much agree with you. I'd maybe even take it a step further and say, even if you can't make a huge difference, you should make a point to do what you can -- it's better to make a minuscule difference than to resign yourself to helplessness and despair because you can't singlehandedly save the world.
      But in the case if the trolley problem, I'd say it's very much implied that there's likely only seconds: you don't have time to outrun the trolley, or to see if someone else is close enough to get people off the track, or to look around for any other solution. It's baked into the scenario that you walk up, see the situation, and immediately choose whether or not to pull the lever, and in that context I think people saying they'd immediately grasp everything and react decisively is about the same as someone saying they'd totally beat up a bank robber. Even if you believe you should. . . . No, no you probably wouldn't.

    • @ObjectsInMotion
      @ObjectsInMotion Рік тому +5

      @@eyesofthecervino3366 I dont think anywhere in the problem literal seconds is implied. In fact, if you can see all of a switchway at once, you're likely very far from the trolley. A switchboard operator probably has at least a minute to decide which track a train must go down, as a train can take up to 10 minutes to brake. Like, its not a lot of time, but its at the very least not much shorter than the amount of time markiplier made the decisions here. And that's the thing, when it comes to a moral decision, the test isn't trying to figure out what you can calculate as the optimal choice in a limited time frame, its trying to figure out what your gut-instinct moral reaction is. Its a philosophy thought experiment after all.
      And most importantly, the meat of the scenario is what's key. In the real world, there *are* people who have only seconds to decide who will live and who will die. If a firefighter ran into a burning building, saw one person in the lobby, but heard 5 people upstairs, should they just not do anything in fear of having a God complex? Who knows what could happen if he tried to go upstairs, the stairs might collapse and he would save nobody. Why not just save the person right by the door and just leave whatever happens upstairs to fate. It's not foolish to imagine being decisive in the face of emergency, it's just being optimistic, imagine what you *should* do instead of what you would likely do.

  • @MyoticTesseract
    @MyoticTesseract 2 роки тому +868

    "THE NEEDS OF THE MANY OUTWEIGH THE NEEDS OF THE FEW!", I yell as I voluntarily let a trolley run over me to see if I can take it
    ~Mark, probably

    • @dannypipewrench533
      @dannypipewrench533 2 роки тому +3

      Does this suggest anarchism?

    • @tumblingartist
      @tumblingartist 2 роки тому +3

      “I bet I could take a tram, I bet I could take a trolley”

    • @mihailmilev9909
      @mihailmilev9909 2 роки тому +1

      not even probably, definitely

    • @mihailmilev9909
      @mihailmilev9909 2 роки тому +1

      @@dannypipewrench533 don't know I'm on a conquest for bread or something

    • @dannypipewrench533
      @dannypipewrench533 2 роки тому +2

      @@mihailmilev9909 Bread Conquests often involve anarchism.

  • @phunky_phoenix
    @phunky_phoenix 2 роки тому +86

    Mark "I'm not a masochist" iplier: "I'm not a masochist, I just want to see what my body can handle" "They're my clones, they would want to get run over with a trolly"

  • @maxorsum
    @maxorsum Рік тому +7

    6:13 me playing this game on that level:
    JOKES ON YOU, I DONT HAVE A BEST FRIEND!!!

  • @nerdomatic2489
    @nerdomatic2489 2 роки тому +115

    2:44
    Mark: "And I do kinda wanna see what my body can take. I'm not a masochist but you know..."
    Ladies and gentlemen, he said the thing.

  • @bumbumtheunicorn8054
    @bumbumtheunicorn8054 2 роки тому +159

    I'm seeing more and more of Darkiplier slowly inching his way out into existence in every video now

  • @LightnCreamy
    @LightnCreamy 2 роки тому +157

    Mark - "Who has enemies"
    Also Mark - *Forgets about Wilford "M" Warfstache*

    • @Hatmis
      @Hatmis 2 роки тому +7

      Aw but Wilford ain't a foe, he a friend :)
      Friend with gun sure but friend still

    • @JayFromWalmark
      @JayFromWalmark 2 роки тому +4

      I dont think Wilford is Mark's enemy though.. sure he stabbed him but like- Mark IS (not) a masochist, for all we know he asked him to do it before they pressed record (to see if he could take it, of course)

    • @rcl4737
      @rcl4737 2 роки тому +1

      Wilford is literally one of Mark’s ego. So while he did stab him, I think it was just for his own entertainment, not on purpose.

    • @arloc357
      @arloc357 2 роки тому

      How about Darkiplier

    • @LightnCreamy
      @LightnCreamy 2 роки тому

      yea, i can see that, i know my boi Willy isn't a bad guy lol, he is dubiously antagonistic though.

  • @eclipse4956
    @eclipse4956 Рік тому +15

    6:25 jokes on you I don't have any friends

  • @Marko.POLO.
    @Marko.POLO. 2 роки тому +36

    11:17
    Mark: "Who has Enimies"
    Everyone: Del Monte

    • @vuedanto8576
      @vuedanto8576 2 роки тому +4

      "Who has enemies?"
      Every victim of any bad thing: "I guess I don't exist"

    • @matthewboire6843
      @matthewboire6843 4 місяці тому

      Don’t know who that is.
      Rick Sanchez does

  • @hiddendesire3076
    @hiddendesire3076 2 роки тому +51

    4:00 If the rich guy has the money on him, don’t pull the level, and merely retrieve the money from the corpse.

    • @hiddendesire3076
      @hiddendesire3076 2 роки тому +6

      @@isimpfor2dvillans61 At the same time though they would likely turn it on you by ratting you out for a reward and never paying up.

    • @Lifetime10154
      @Lifetime10154 Рік тому +2

      He probably has it in the bank dude

    • @thesecondderivative8967
      @thesecondderivative8967 Рік тому +2

      No one has $500 000 on hand.

    • @thesecondderivative8967
      @thesecondderivative8967 Рік тому +1

      ​@@hiddendesire3076 So? One person was going to die anyway. Who's to say the poor person wouldn't do the same?

  • @alasdairsinclair916
    @alasdairsinclair916 2 роки тому +226

    Lixian: "I can hook them."
    Welp, time to equip deliverance.

    • @prophet7216
      @prophet7216 2 роки тому +8

      Oh yes, dbd memes

    • @Frosty_X4
      @Frosty_X4 2 роки тому +2

      Haha lol I dont remember you getting a safe rescue tho

    • @yphoenix5957
      @yphoenix5957 2 роки тому +1

      Hit Lixian with -Dead Hard- E to Dab on the h8ters

  • @takatacheroki2624
    @takatacheroki2624 2 роки тому +40

    For me, the fact that the rich guy tried to bribe me would have sealed his fate. I would have been trying to figure out a way to save both of them if possible otherwise.
    In short: "How *dare* you think you can bribe me to kill!" -Leaves them to their fate.-

    • @dylantaylor5829
      @dylantaylor5829 2 роки тому

      Right?

    • @TheCool_Guy23
      @TheCool_Guy23 Рік тому +2

      I woulda left him to his fate the moment I realized he was rich

    • @mickaelrocher8121
      @mickaelrocher8121 Рік тому

      Well it interesing but i pulled on the bélief that the rich man didnt wanted to kill him the other man or maybe he wasnt even aware thar there were an man on another track
      For me he just asked me to save him
      Beside im pretty sûre that if the man had more than 500 $ , he probably do an similar offer than the rich man

    • @mrhubert1462
      @mrhubert1462 Рік тому

      ​@@TheCool_Guy23what is the problem with rich people

    • @gljames24
      @gljames24 Рік тому

      ​​@@mrhubert1462They hoard wealth using regulatory capture and prevent societal progress.

  • @SHREK32344
    @SHREK32344 2 роки тому +127

    This game takes “would you rather” to a whole new level

    • @ThePcHeadedGuy
      @ThePcHeadedGuy 2 роки тому +1

      @DONT go to my home page! no.

    • @ThePcHeadedGuy
      @ThePcHeadedGuy 2 роки тому +2

      @Kavetion if your better then Mark then you wouldn't be using a damn bot to get attention because you didn't have parent's.

    • @ThePcHeadedGuy
      @ThePcHeadedGuy 2 роки тому

      @MrBeas𝔱 ⸜⁄ your content is as good as your sock, *replace it already*

    • @narumiidle
      @narumiidle 2 роки тому +2

      It’s sad how Mark’s comment’s, are full of brainless bot’s. :|

    • @SHREK32344
      @SHREK32344 2 роки тому +2

      @@narumiidle :( yes

  • @msw3314
    @msw3314 2 роки тому +37

    11:26 “Unless…”
    *ACTOR MARK INTENSIFIES*

  • @gooserken8118
    @gooserken8118 2 роки тому +41

    7:34 - The most intense moment on UA-cam unfolds before your eyes

  • @albertinstan5090
    @albertinstan5090 2 роки тому +36

    4:13 kill the rich guy and steal all his Money

  • @hiemsxhiems
    @hiemsxhiems 2 роки тому +256

    Mark: "If you don't return your cart, you are a bad citizen"
    people who don't return their carts watching this: 👁👄👁

    • @BlackMoonHowls
      @BlackMoonHowls 2 роки тому +2

      The people that are paid as employees at Walmart to collect the carts. Don't get paid if you return your cart properly.

    • @Lewd-Tenant_Isan
      @Lewd-Tenant_Isan 2 роки тому +15

      It's a test if you're a good citizen or not, do you return the trolley because it's the right thing to do and not because of any ulterior motives or factors forcing you to or do you simply leave it in the parking lot?

    • @hiemsxhiems
      @hiemsxhiems 2 роки тому +30

      @@Lewd-Tenant_Isan Personally, I always return my shopping cart, just because I don't want it to cause others any inconvenience. 😅

    • @FatWalterWhite69
      @FatWalterWhite69 2 роки тому +1

      That was unfunny

    • @animeloveer97
      @animeloveer97 2 роки тому +17

      @@hiemsxhiems def not true lol your supposed to put it uin the things in the parking lot then they come take them when its full to clean them and put them back into the store lol

  • @etienneleroi9515
    @etienneleroi9515 2 роки тому +21

    I remember looking up trolley problem memes with my friends after listening to the episode of Distractible where they mentioned it. We laughed absurdly at 'You are a moral philosophy teacher. Nobody is in any danger. You can tie people to the tracks to save your job.'
    Edit; I mean, I love Distractible, and the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, so, sorry Chica

  • @Ajlez
    @Ajlez 2 роки тому +73

    "Those 10 years were never there to begin with" Love this line.

  • @Macken-n9l
    @Macken-n9l Рік тому +8

    0:17 I would pull the lever to wave to all the people.

  • @MrLoverman7134
    @MrLoverman7134 2 роки тому +59

    2:45
    Mark: "I'm not a masochist"
    Everyone else: yes, yes you are

    • @Cosmentix
      @Cosmentix 2 роки тому

      @Kavetion said no one ever

    • @1_FLASKFAN
      @1_FLASKFAN 2 роки тому

      @@Cosmentix he just did

  • @pulsesilver1457
    @pulsesilver1457 2 роки тому +70

    Do nothing, Mark can tank the trolley protecting Wade, even then, theoretically, if we think about this very carefully, the train would miraculously bounce off Bob, causing the train to fly over both protecting both in the first place.

    • @laurazwags
      @laurazwags 2 роки тому +6

      My thoughts upon reading his trolly problem were “NO! NOT CHICA!!!”