WHEN BEING THE SAFETY NET WOMAN GOES WRONG
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
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No lies detected, I've learned this lesson the hard way. Now I cut them off soon as they try to love bomb me and I'm running background checks like I'm the FBI.
Met a man shortly before the pandemic started.. things were going okay until he became financially unstable...it started very slowly.. then snowball effect... every phone call he did the dry begging routine.. 🙄 complaining about how broke he was and this and that.. he started "making jokes" about coming to live with me and having "2 of everything" (meaning he thought he would junk up my house with his rubbish, instead of purchasing a storage unit)... and that he'd commender one of my guests rooms and install a 🔐 LOCK ON THE DOOR... 😅 ... all this talk went on bcx as he knew his funds were low he would get evicted... LADIES listen for signs of coming problems. Men are testing to see your reaction to things. Every time he would say he moving.. I'd say WHERE?? AIN'T no space for you here.. still living peacefully in my 4 bedroom 4 bath ALONE!!!!!! be blessed ladies.
That's exactly how it happened to me. He was so quick and rushing and I was excited and boom.... A bunch of problems in my lap to deal with .
Dated this 52 year old grown boy who wanted to quickly move in! He wanted to know if I would have his back if he needed me. He was in credit card debt and I found out that he sparingly worked. But he wanted to start a car restoration business...🙄🙄🙄! I told him to get somebody else to do it! Please and thank you!
I experienced that a couple years ago....he wanted me to be his safety net and he only brought stress, his hardships and tainted opinions. He had his own place but couldn't afford to maintain adulting he lied about working. I returned him to the streets as he was no use to me. I didnt need the stress.....
@@vincyspice1 wow...sounds like we dated the same guy! I am content with my kids! I refuse to take care of a grown man! I just can't do it. This guy wanted me to add him as an authorized user on my credit cards to help build his credit. I was like umm No!!! He quickly lost interest when he realized that I was NOT going to provide for him! What is the world coming to??? 🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️
Ewwww
I had to move out my house because a bum wouldn’t leave. Never again, don’t leave anything here! If you earned the privilege to spend the night you have to leave in the morning! You can only see me 2 days out the week!
I cannot stand a man who cannot stand on his own. I automatically lose respect for him. They're supposed to protect, provide, pursue, and love us women and they can't do that.
TRUE!
I had a man talking about marriage during the pandemic . He asked me if we had to be married to live together and I said yes we do. A week later I found out he didn’t pay his rent during the pandemic and was being evicted.
Wow!! Why doesn’t this surprise me?
And this is why NO man comes to my home period! I just got rid of one who had a problem with that lol. I have a child, a little girl at that, to protect. I’ve had my fair share of weirdos to know they can’t be trusted. I’d hate for them to f around and find out.
🎯
Ladies *do not* allow a man to enter your home for the first 6 months of dating. Lie and say you live with your father or uncle. Do a background check on any & every man you date.
I learned this lesson the hard way in my 20s and 30s. Multiple men who moved it. And in both cases it was gradual. It always started off with a toothbrush. Then I look up and he had a drawer. The the drawer turned into a closet and they had moved in. In the love bombing stage, I didn't mind them coming over all of the time. Sometimes, this stuff happens without a conversation. Now? When you come to my house, you are take ALL your stuff with you when you leave.
Stop entertaining men who don’t have their OWN place to stay.
@@bidah007 Well when we first go out they do have a place to stay. All three had apartments supposedly of their own. But little did I know the living situation was shaky. One's house was about to be foreclosed and I didn't know and the other was about to be evicted and I didn't know.
Stop inviting men to your house until they have invested time and money into you...consistently
Women do take responsibility. I'm so sick of men talking about women to women. When are they going to talk to men about being a man. I'll be waiting for that day.
👌🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Exactly..I’ve been saying this for years now. I’m tired of dudes talking to us when it’s clear the males are not doing to work to become men.
Okay!!👏🏾👏🏾
AMEN,Sista!
Ladies guys lie. An associate of one of my brothers bragged on about “I work EVERYday.” Then we come to find out he worked only 20 minutes a day max cleaning his landlord’s 🚽 bathroom.
Whoa..WHAT??
I have been unconsciously a safety net in all my relationships and its not fair and it doesn't pay!
AMEN!
Women should not be safety nets that's a parents job and if they are grown they need to manage their lives so that they can take care of themselves. I will never do that again. Most men move on after you've stretched yourself far and wide to help them.
While I do believe this phenomenon is not exclusive to blk males, I do think it's the majority, forien & domestic.
my question is this: What if you know someone like this? How much do you listen to this?? How much/how long do you advise? I'm kind of avoidig someone right now, we been talking about her being in this position for a year. If I can cleaRly see, that she's not growing but I am... what do I do and what do I say bc honestly I'M NOT ANSWERING THE PHONE ON THIS ISSUE NO MORE!!!
Thanks for sharing.
🤎🤎🤎