Sibling Loss: The Overlooked Grief
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- Опубліковано 26 сер 2024
- The death of a Sibling changes and challenges everything. When a Sibling dies you lose a shared past and the anticipated future.💔 I have recently supported many siblings who have lost a brother or sister through the Opioid Crisis. 😔
If you have lost a sibling please teach us what was helpful for you by leaving a comment below.
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• Sibling Loss: The Over...
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Been going through this since my sister passed in 2018. Everything is always about my mom. I get she lost her child but dang that was my sister
I lost my gentle kind brother 20 weeks ago unexpectedly. I am the oldest and Steve was 18 months younger than me, and it was 4.5 years after his birth that the next child was born. I explain to people that my parents were fully formed as people when they started having children. But us children/siblings helped to shape and form each other, we had a huge influence on the people each other became. Our siblings have been part of our entire existence. I don’t have memories of my life without Steve in them. I feel like I have lost part of myself. I am so terribly sorry for the loss of your sister 💔 We are members of a club that you wish NOONE ever had to be a part of.
Thank you cus that's what I'm going through right now. I lost my brother a week ago and my mother even told me it's not about you and he was my only brother and I was there when he died. It's a pain and image I'll never be able to unfeel or unsee.
I'm going through the same thing, unfortunately.
Ewwww how selfish of you. Disgusting. That’s your mom’s child. What a sick jealous outlook
When my brother died in an accident, one of the few ppl that ever cared enough to ask me how I was doing for me and not anyone else was some random stranger outside the hospital that didn’t know me or my situation. She sat with me for probably 20 minutes on the ground outside the hospital 5 years ago today in 35° weather while I cried. I don’t even know her name, but I’ll never forget her kindness and her ability to hold space for a stranger’s grief.
My only older brother passed a couple of months ago on May 04, 2023. His name is Jaime Felipe Amaya. Today is his birthday and I miss him so much. I feel alone in my grief. The “friends” that I thought would be there for me are nowhere to be found. I’ve been handling his personal affairs and haven’t had much time to grieve. Between work, and researching what to do next has been very tough. I’m doing the best that I can but feel like I’m on autopilot. My heart goes out to anyone watching this video and reading the comments because there is a reason why you felt the need to search for a video like this. Maybe you feel alone and put aside like I do. We will get through this. I don’t know how, but we will. One hour, minute at a time.
❤❤
Sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to your family. I more than understand and I’m literally on autopilot myself. Although once im alone and the autopilot comes off the pain I feel is so excruciating I don’t think it’s ever going to go away but I’d like to think that maybe one day I can turn most of that pain to happy thoughts and memories and energy to continue living how’d they want us to.
You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Play just lost my brother 3 days ago to cancer most painful thing in my life I don't know how I'm going to get through this please people keep me in prayer my God is my only hope and strength
I lost my older brother, Matt on February 4 2023 to opioids. My only sibling. I thought he’d be here until the end 💔
I lost my brother 💔 he was my best friend and my soul mate. I feel guilty because I was calling him for days and texting him and he wasn't getting back to me. Every day that went by I got more and more worried. I finally broke down crying in my house for an hour before I left my house before I got into my car to drive over to his apartment.
When I took the key to open his apartment door, I felt such a bad gut feeling. It felt like someone was in his apartment. I walked into his bathroom and he was face down. I turned him over and said Kevin. I took his arm and said please Kevin.
I cry every day. I can't believe I found my brother Kevin dead on his bathroom floor. This was January 3, 2022. The police are still trying to find out who killed my brother.
My heart is forever broken 💔 I will never be the same again. My brother was always there for me. I love him so much. He will always remain in my heart forever. I love you Kevin so much.
Oh my god, Donna! How traumatic for you! I'm so sorry to know that you are the person who found your brother like that.
My heart goes out to you and I do hope that your heart will mend in time. I don't consider myself as someone who prays, but maybe in my own way, I do and my thoughts are with you and your brother's soul. Maybe Kevin and my brother are up there in heaven praying for us that we can heal and go on with our lives.
My Brother was incredibly special to me as well. My heart is broken, too. We must find a way to move forward... but never forget. I know you won't forget your brother and somehow, he will always be with you.
Be well, Donna. Take care of yourself and your Heart.
Thinking of you Donna ❤️
So he had been dead several days?
I am so sorry. Truly, I lost my 23 year old brother July,18,2022. I'm 25 and I was 6 months pregnant when he died. We are still unsure of how he died and why ... I feel your pain. I Did not find my brother though is girlfriend did. I see how it effects her I feel the loss, you are not alone.
Oh no! What is there to say? There's a tear in my eye and I'm not exactly a crier. Honey, not your fault. You had something, I believe God, telling you something was wrong and you needed to go check. If you would have taken what you think was the first chance you couldn't have saved him. If the perpetrator would have still been present, you might have also been murdered. I'm trying not to preach that's not what you need right now. Do you think you're having survivor's guilt in a way? You are not alone. I done lost someone who I regarded as a brother, to drugs. mercy. I was in my own alcoholism. I knew he was struggling. I had thoughts of if only I would have stopped drinking long enough to help him, that he would be alive today. I'm sober since 4 Jun 2012. Adam died in 2010. AA done helped me realise it wasn't my fault and there was nothing I could have done drunk or sober. I need you to realise that it's not your fault and there was nothing you could have done. You cannot carry that feeling of guilt, could have should have would have. Please don't think that way. I hope you read every word of this. I don't have to have met you I already love you or I would not be writing. You in my prayers
When I was 6 years old I lost my 5 year old brother. 1978 I don't think people back then recognized this kind of trauma. I have struggled with this all my life. I'm 51 years old now.
My younger Sister Debbie passed unexpectedly January 8, 2024. Having lost both parents within 6 months of each other and now my first baby doll…I’m the eldest sibling. This hits so differently. It was a gut punch I’ll never forget. I love that girl. We only had her celebration of life service February 3, 2024, so at this writing it’s still so so fresh. Her favorite color was orange so I use the orange heart 🧡 in her memory.
Sister passed away 2 weeks ago from Sepsis. Sending hugs
@@jennifertucker2581 sending love and hugs your way too. You must talk it out when you’re ready. It’s still pretty fresh.🕊️
My older brother passed away 10 days ago. I loved him dearly. I don’t know where to even begin. 🕊
I'm sorry. 💔
So very sorry , I share your grief ,i lost my brother 2 days ago.
I lost my beautiful sister Joni yesterday,my heart is broken,she was not only a sister she was my very first best friend.i will miss her gentle heart,she did not judge she only loved.May you rest in heavenly peace sweetJoni,until we meet again i love you,Jeanie🕊🤍🤍
To everyone in these comments grieving and not knowing where to begin or how to feel. I just want to tell you that it will get easier to manage the pain. My lil brother passed away four years ago at age 21 due to an overdose. Aside from my brother. He was my bestfriend. I didn’t know what to do for many months straight my mind was scattered full of emotion but with the power of god and the will to continue to live for him. It gets easier. His name is Daniel Joshua Castro. Forever. Young 💚
I lost my older brother. I found him hanging outside of our house an hour after new year. I had called him many times but he never picked up so I assumed he just didn't wanna talk, he sometimes does that. When I went outside, I saw him standing strangely. I yelled his name out a few times but I didn't receive an answer. At that moment, I was probably the most scared I had ever been. I ran inside and told my mom to call my brother inside. And that's when things went downhill. My brother had committed suicide right before the new year... I am only 17, I suddenly have so many responsibilities on my hands and I have to stay strong for my parents. Being someone with severe depression and trauma, this all feels like a dream... He left me with another trauma. I miss him and I loved him. Rest in peace, brother...
God bless you for this. “Take care of your mom” or “how’s your mom? Or everyone else” … that hits home.
28 years since my brother's funeral, and I still remember the receiving line of adults patting my tiny arm and telling me to take care of my mom.
@@barryberkmanblock ❤
Its been a rough ride emotionally for everyone. Mom is ok, it's still very hard for her to except and cope at times but everyone does their fair share to give her support. Thank you for your kind words!
Same for me, when my sister died I my mom was two weeks away from giving birth to our younger sister. I remember my dad telling me that I had to take care of my mom and not to make her upset. That stuck with me for a long time, I was seven when my sister died and spent the rest of my childhood and adolescence with worrying about not upsetting her. I couldn’t cry because she would cry, I wasn’t allowed to feel because my parents loss was greater then mine. It’s so invalidating when you’re a second tear person after the loss of such a big part of your life. Ever since I have kind of been a loner and isolate when I’m having a hard time since I was left alone so much while she was sick and after she died and then our sister was born. I didn’t matter in my family unless they needed me for something. It still is that way, now that I’ve been so sick with autoimmune diseases no one calls because I can’t do things for them. Now the only times I matter is when I’m sick enough to be in the hospital. My sister and I have both been so sick but why did her illness take her and mine keep me here to suffer without her. We we’re connected at the hip and I’ve had to go through life without that one person
Exactly! When my brother died, my uncle literally walked up to me and said "you need to be strong for your mother". I wanted to tell him, "I need strength too!"
My brother unexpectedly passed away at 24 in January. He was my only brother. I hope I can be enough for our parents. It’s so painful.
So sorry for your loss. I am dealing with the same. My only brother was killed 3/16 tragically. Weeks before his 25th birthday. I don’t even know where to begin. The pain is unimaginable.
Lost my sister about a week ago she was 24 about 3 years younger than me. And the amount of time I didn't spend hanging out with her even though I lived in the same building is really breaking My heart. I know I don't really like hanging out with very many of my friends and family so I hope that she knew it wasn't just her. And it's not like I knew she was going to die because she died suddenly. I just hope one day I get to see her again and we can hang out like we did when we were little kids
I lost my brother suddenly in 2003. The last time I saw him I was kicking out if a dinner for my father. I lived out of town and did NOT want to talk to his old friends. I felt guilty for not doing more. I’m sure they did too. Then I went back to where I lived, and it was like it never happened. Please talk to someone. It helps.
Just lost my 24 year old sister to a drug overdose, she was older than me but I can understand how you feel
My sister passed a week ago. This is all new to me and has sucked the life out of me. But with God’s grace and mercy,I will get through this.
I wish this kind of content had been available years ago when my sister died. It was an eviscerating experience and I had no support because it was simply not acknowledged as significant by anyone. My sister was my best friend all of my life. She died young and i cared for her as she died. The planet cracked that day. I'll miss her for the rest of my life. It's simply a huge wound I've just had to grow to accept. But I'll never get over it.
My brother Joakim took his own life 3 months ago, I talk to him every day, like he is still here, and he is then, it helps a little in this enourmous grief.
My family just buried my older brother the other day. I've been trying to process losing him for a little over a week. I'm now the oldest of my siblings and cousins, and he left behind two beautiful, wonderful kids who will only know him as photographs and stories. He was supposed to be there for me when our parents passed,. Instead, I was there for our parents when he passed. Thank you for this video, which plainly stated a lot of things I've been thinking and feeling, but it's nice to hear from the outside. To everyone who has commented or found this video for reason I did, I wish you nothing but the best. Know that your pain is real, it is shared, and you are loved.
Yes siblings loss is under recognized and it does change ones view of life, it erases the possibility of a future, it is horrible, my sister passed away a year ago, I am still grieving her loss
I am a twice suicide survivor. I’m glad I found you. I lost my only sibling, my brother to suicide. And now I have lost my youngest child, my son to suicide. I am struggling to survive this grief. It consumes my every waking hour. And even in my sleep through nightmares! Losing them is hard enough. But losing them this way is so much harder. I worry for my children more than ever now. I’m in therapy but I’m so distraught that I do not leave my house if I dont have to. I use to visit my daughter at least every other week. I don’t anymore. I am hurting & there is no way to hide it. I do the best I can when I do see them. I want to be there more for them more but I dont know how. It causes me more grief when I am with them. We do talk daily. But that’s not the same. I try to hide my sorrow as much as I can. But sometimes I can’t. I hope that what I learn from you will help me in my suicide grief journey.
Thank you so much for this, Jo. My brother's name was Daren. He was our light and the glue that held our family together. He died, unexpectedly one month ago. He was the youngest, the only boy and he loved us, his sisters, so much. Our family feels different...smaller...something's missing....broken. I only hope that he is in a better place now, at peace. Thank you for thinking of him in your meditations.
My little sister passed away 8 months ago. She like your brother, held our family completely together. She was the breath of fresh air that we always needed. My family has also changed. A piece of the puzzle will be forever missing. There is just a sadness when we are together.
I can certainly appreciate your situation and I'm very sorry for your loss, Grace.
As you're the one here, writing in this thread and expressing your feelings perhaps now, you will be the one who can bring a breath of fresh air to your family. And hopefully, in time, things will get better. If they don't, then know what to expect and have peace in the fact that you give a shit enough, to share and look for answers.
Now that some time has gone by since Daren died, and I've become a bit more adjusted to my new reality, I've been making more of an effort to stay in touch with my 2 sisters.
My older sister has started to lean on me in a way that she never did before...in a really good way. We promised each other that we would go through this together. I've also been there for my Mom in a way, that I've never had to be, before. It's brought us closer and...she's 80 now. It's really hard for her to have lost her only boy. She's getting old in her ways and I just want for her to have some peace and as much happiness as possible in her last years.
As a free spirited person who has always just done whatever, I now feel as though I have more of a responsibility to my family and especially to my Mother. It's sort of a role that my Brother took on after my Dad died.
But there's still my little sister. If I don't call her, I would probably never hear from her! This is no different than before, though. My brother's passing didn't make a difference where hers and my relationship is concerned, although I hoped that it would.
She's not once, expressed any grief over our brother's passing. But she's cried over the passing of her deceased husbands great nephew. I couldn't believe my ears when she went on and on and on about a person who she hardly knew! But never expressed her feelings about our brother!
It makes me feel so sad and I don't even know what to say to her! She even told me that her ex's family has made her feel like more of their family, than our family does. It really hurt me to hear her say that, when I'm the one who always calls her, just to say hi and see how she's doing. She never does that with us girls. Most of the time, she doesn't even ask me how I'm doing or even what I'm up to :(.
She only calls my older sister when she needs something. Now that my older sister doesn't grow what my sister used to call for, my older sister doesn't hear from her either.
I really hoped that would change, but it hasn't. I don't think there's anything that I can do now, except what I've always done. And I'm not going to stop.
So Grace, stay strong and do your best to nurture the relationships that you already have with your family. And accept love and nurturing from those who offer it to you as long as it's healthy.
This stuff sucks but we still need to keep moving forward and take care of ourselves. It's okay though to feel sad when you feel sad. I hope your sister comes to you in your dreams, like my Brother does. He just always says 'hi', asks me how I'm doing and tell me that he's fine...that he's just taking a little break. 💔🥰
RIP my brother. Please come and see me again, soon! It's been a little while 🙏
Janice
Oh yeah...and tomorrow, November 5th, would have been my brother's 55th Birthday. I always loved calling him for his birthday! Often times he was working in the bush for his B-day and had no cell reception, but he always got back to me when he could to acknowledge the call and so say thank you. Damn...
my younger brother died 2 weeks ago, unexpectedly also. only boy.. so i understand how you feel… he was only 28
@@br0kensun I'm so sorry to hear that. May he rest in peace. Please take care of yourself. The healing path for you and your family can be a bit rough so please remember to take good care of yourself. 🙏
I lost my brother in 1991. I was 19, he was 16. It was sudden and totally unexpected. I saw him 90 minutes before he died. That was the last time I hugged him and heard his voice. He had asked to borrow my truck for prom 😂😂. Of course, I told him yes.
I digress, I’m writing this for me to be honest. I’ve never dealt with it appropriately. Not through addiction or gambling or anything terrible, but I’ve lived with such an empty void for 33 years. It has become who I am. As our parents have aged and had health issues, I have felt so alone and afraid. When mom and dad pass, it will be just me. Yes, I have a loving wife and three kids, but I feel alone/empty. Of my own volition and by recognizing this, I have started with a counselor for the first time in 53 years. I’ve never wanted to deal with it. Yes, I cry when I’m alone sometimes, think about what could have been or tell myself an idealized version of what I think life would be like should he still be here. I weep over every little slight, fight, or when I didn’t want little bro tagging along. Makes me feel all the more terrible because I’d give just about anything to have him here now. I am angry with him because I’m not sure if it was an intentional act or just a terrible accident although it really doesn’t matter as the end result is either way, he’s not here. He left me…. Or that’s the way I feel. If I could have one hour with him I’d hit him right square in the mouth then spend the rest of that time hugging him and telling him how MUCH I love him and how I have missed him. He’s never met my wife or kids, he’s a picture to them. He hasn’t been there to help me deal with Dad and his health issues (Dad has been devastated ever since although you can’t tell as an outsider). He wasn’t here to at least hold my hand and Mom’s hand as she battled and beat cancer. Then, I feel guilty about wanting him back or wanting to change the past because I wouldn’t have met my wife or have the kids I have now.
I have been so angry with God for allowing this. I turned my back on God completely until about 5 years ago. God and I reconciled about 5 years ago and He has sent me on this journey to this point ever since. One of the things I’m committed to doing is sharing with others to attempt to help by sharing. I get joy through helping others.
If there is someone reading this in a similar situation or to whom this has happened to recently I want to tell you that you are NOT alone. There is no right or wrong way to grieve, only a healthy and unhealthy way. I encourage you and pray you will waste no time in seeking advice and guidance on a healthy way to grieve. God bless and all my love!
I lost my brother in 1981. I so wished I have gotten help for my grief instead the road I went down not having children or letting anyone get close to me. I seem to miss him more the older I get and find myself wondering what he would be up to and how my life may have been different. I'm almost 60 years old and I miss you Russell.
Brandon Alan Taylor is my beloved brother who passed on 8/5/24. Thank you so much for this loving helpful video as I work through my grief and continuing on in this world without him. ❤
I recently lost my younger brother at age 49. He was the most amazing man, brother, husband and son I’ve ever known. So kind to everyone n full of life. Died suddenly. I’m having a hard time with accepting this as realty. My mind can’t wrap around it. We were extremely close. We had big plans together for our future! My heart is forever broken.
My sister, Crystal, 9 1/2 years younger, passed last year a month after she turned 33 from a brain aneurysm caused by Lupus. I was blessed to have her as my sister in the mess of a dysfunctional family dynamic we have. We were soul sisters from the beginning and each others biggest supporters. I miss her more than words can express and feel lost in my grief as I alone now have to navigate between both of our difficult parents. Being in a support group with others who shared the same loss was most helpful. She was and is my ray of light in what feels like a dark empty place now.
my only and older brother Eggy passed away at 36 3 weeks ago, and he was my mom soulmate, her safety net and harbor. While i'm grieving myself i also grief for my mom for having to get through all this, if i could take his place instead to lessen her pain i'd do it gladly.. i'd never be capable enough to fill his shoes. The thought of growing old without him is unbearable.
I just lost my brother 3 weeks ago in a tragic car accident…he knew me better than I even knew myself . 💔
I lost my sister a year ago . She battled with cancer for 7 years .
Her 21 year old daughter died a year prior to her death .
I cannot get over the loss of her . I cry all the time . My other sister is having a hard time too . Knowing that I can’t see or hear her voice again is hard .
Her name is Paula Needler Karpinski .
I thought I heard her call my name when I was in my car in the driveway. It was so clear and it was as if she was sitting right next to me .
My faith makes me believe I will see her again it’s just hard living in this world without her 😢
My sister died early this morning. I have listened to your video 2x now. You have so aware this grief is extreme. I care for my 90 year mother and have been preparing for her passing. Not my sister. I'm in San Diego if you can refer me to someone it would be very helpful. She was a friend and mentor just like you said.
Thank you Jo. My 70 year old fraternal twin, Cherie, died unexpectedly. We always talked about what
it would be like when we got to 90:) Today is the 6 month anniversary and I am just sad. I think the loss of the shared history,
the unique sense of family humor is the most painful part, as well as being the last survivor of my nuclear family.
Spot on. We were like Twins. She was Arnold and I was Danny DeVito. But she always treated me like we were equals. “We’re twins.” Best wishes to anyone that is watching this video. It’s been over five years and it hurts the same every day.
My sister, Kim, passed on February 15 after a 3 1/2 year battle with cancer. She was 43. Her daughter just celebrated her 10th birthday party this weekend. Some days are harder than others, and this is one of them. I give thanks that my sister is now free of cancer and no longer in pain. And I know Kim was grinning like a fool, watching my niece singing karaoke to Taylor Swift with her girlfriends yesterday. But that doesn’t change the fact that cancer is a rat bastard, and I miss my sister.
Thank you for addressing when siblings don’t get along. It doesn’t mean you don’t grieve. My sibling who just died earlier this evening and I were “estranged”. It was sad, but necessary. Anyway, thanks for having that part in there. ❤️
I'm sorry, Brenda, to know about the loss of your sibling. This is very fresh for you and I'm glad that you found this video so soon.
It helped me and I think I need to watch it again.
Condolences to you and your family.
I lost my big sister 6 months ago at the age of 38. She was more of a parent and friend when we were growing up with my bro. Her life was inspirational and I looked up to her as a role model. My sister became the sole breadwinner when my parents retired. She was supposed to visit over the Christmas holidays, sadly she didn't even make it to Christmas. My parents are devastated and it breaks my heart to see them hurting. It hurts me everyday, whenever I think of the lost times and the future without her. I joined a grief support group, and it helps me somehow. I love and miss you Phostine.❤
My younger sister was my best friend and support after my daughter died. She died 13 months after my daughter. The world has gone dark and silent without them both.
Sibling Loss is widely under recognized yet it changes one's view of life... This video is dedicated to Worldwide Bereaved Siblings Month. 👫👬👭 Please leave a comment to teach us all what has helped you in the loss of your sister or brother. 💞 If you want to learn about joining my private online membership called The Grievolution Collective you can find information here. www.jomcrogers.com/grievolution-collective.html
This was spot on. My 30 year old son Tommy took his own life in July. I only have 2 boys and now my 22 year old son is going through what you talked about. Thank you for sharing this about siblings. I’m dealing with it as a parent and trying to console my son as well. It’s just a living nightmare every day. I’ve decided.. it’s a “life sentence “😢
He certainly is. I am the younger brother who lost his brother in February. It's like a never ending depressed state of being. I suppose we can only wonder who has it easier being left here to mourn or on the other side. I'm sorry for yours and his loss. And the rest of your family.
We buried my only brother 4 days ago. there are 3 of us girls and he was probably closer to me as he was exactly 1 year older than me. we grew up in an environment that was not kind to either of us. we both turned to drinking and drugs. I have 4 years clean and he tried and tried to to do the same. His demons wouldnt leave him alone and he fought so hard. my best friend, my protector, my everything. this world is a cruel nasty place. my pain for him is unbearable, I just want him home, he meant more to me than i could ever express. Thank you for your thoughtful video
I lost my brother 34 days ago. His name was John. Please keep us I'm your prayers. I'm heartbroken 💔 thank you
Thank you for your spot-on analysis. I lost two brothers, many years apart. Of course, each loss was different but the first was far more difficult because it happened in childhood. I was seven and my 8 year old brother died unexpectedly from a burst appendix. As you describe, it's a double loss because your parents are no longer the same people, and while they go through the various and horrific stages of grief, you are left to sort it out on your own. Birth order is never discussed. I had been the middle child and was suddenly thrust into the older child's role, while having to fill the void left by my older brother. I had a real case of survivor's guilt. I got through it somehow, but spent many years in anger and depression. It affected all of my relationships, since I would never let people get close enough to hurt me again. Finally, I got some very helpful therapy and was able to marry and raise children of my own. At 52, my younger bother died.
I lost my brother a month ago from pancreatic cancer and it feels unreal. It feels wrong that I’m here and he’s not. I wouldn’t have been the person I am without him and I’m afraid of the person I will become without him. I love you so much bro and I’m going to do everything I can to make you proud. ❤
I lost my younger brother in March 2020. He died of a heart attack . He left behind 2 beautiful kids and a wonderful wife. We have been devastated. He was the light of the party. But life had more in storage for us. My oldest brother died in April 2021 and another one died in December 2021. The last one died 3 days ago . He was 62. Also from a heart attack. To this point I don't even want to tell anybody I know. It sounds like a very unique story. I feel numb. I don't know what to think. I don't want to cry, I don't want to pray. I feel so sad, with no energy to keep living a normal life. I imagine this is normal considering the circumstances.
My oldest brother, Ed Jr., unexpectedly died on September 9, 2023 at the age of 86. I'm 81 and the only one left of my immediate family.
❤❤
Thank you for this video. My older brother was a pedestrian hit by a car and killed last weekend at age 50. We were estranged for several years. Family trauma and some mental health so my mom and I knew we had to separate. Regardless, I loved him so much. I knew he was in pain and trying to heal his wounds from the trauma years. He found his healing through music and the people in Ashland, OR. He became an icon there a one man didgeredoo playing band. The people of Ashland have done so much to honor him including a candlelight vigil last night. Your video helped me so much by not looking back at decisions to take space in our relationship. At the time, it was necessary. Thank you for that important reminder. My two other siblings and mom say it feels surreal and they are not experiencing heavy emotions as I am. Thank you for the reminder we all grieve differently. I have reached out to many friends he had in Ashland via social media and connecting with them has been a great source of healing...knowing how well loved he was..really fils my heart...still, this is complicated grief. His name is Mark Langille or as the people of Ashland and Joshua Tree know him, Marcus Fire.
My brother of 5 years older than me just passed from depression 💔. Ive never felt this pain before- this emptiness. I feel when he did what he did he took my soul with his. I see no future for me. The future i had anticipated doesnt seem so clear as it was when he was still here with me. 10 days after his birthday he did it😞- i feel so broken , so lonely- helpless. Like ive been thrown in the deep end of a pull with a bag over my head.
My older sister passed away at 20 years old 5 years ago in a tragic car accident. She was my best friend. I was a teenager when she passed, and I felt (and still feel) immense pressure dealing with the grief that you so articulated so well on top of trying to figure out the world.
hi cassandra, i had chills reading your comment just now as my older sister also suddenly passed away when she was 20 years old. she had compromised health and her body could not keep going. i was 18 at the time and am now 22. i really resonate with your feelings of heaviness and confusion. it will be her 4 year anniversary this sunday and i cant quite believe it. sending you and your sister love and peace
Are you okay now😢
My brother, Eric, died unexpectedly at 44 in February. I'm the oldest and we had two younger sisters. He had a wife and two children. We are a very close family. The confusion of roles has been pronounced as you said. We always joked that he was the voice of reason and our rock, after growing up with a bunch of emotional chicks. I struggled with addiction a few years ago and caused my family a lot of heartache and while I am grateful to be sober and capable of my big sister role once again, I have had some passing thoughts that it should have been me. I don't dwell there, it just helps to admit I've had them. Thank you for this video. You have very beautiful energy. Namaste.
My big brother passed away a month ago on the 11 of July 2024 when Liam was 22. and this video has hit every nail on the head on how unrecognised mine (19) and my younger brothers (17) grief is. I felt that i had not only lost my big brother but my mum to and that made the process a lot harder as she would often lash out at me when consumed by her grief. I have often been told to take care of my mother and that I’m “lucky” to not have been the child to have done this to my parents. (My brother took his own life) I was always asked how my parents and brother or even my grandparents were doing never how myself was handling my grief. Me being the next eldest I felt that I had the responsibility to fill in many of the roles that were missing now that my parents were grieving and i largely felt that my grief had to pushed aside to care for my parents and younger brother. I often felt that my parents would have preferred that it was me to have passed away instead or that it was my fault for not seeing any signs of his mental health issues before it was too late. And due to the lack of art I gave to my grief I had little to no improvement to my own personal mental health even now that the funeral has passed. Im currently seeking resources to help me try and understand and navigate my grief and how I can also support my brother without diminishing my own needs and this video has helped so thank you.
I'm glad I found your page. It's been very helpful. I'm the oldest of 3 sisters. We were very close, especially as adults. They were my best friends. We did everything together. I lost my youngest sister 8 years ago from complications after a surgery. She fought to stay with us and her son. But, ultimately passed away after 4 months. I lost my other sister 4 years ago. She passed away suddenly from a pulmonary embolism. I visited her that day. She made dinner for us. We discussed plans for Thanksgiving. She wasn't feeling well, so I asked if I should stay until she felt better. She said no, I'm tired, I'm going to try to get some sleep. I said ok, told her I loved her, then left. A little over an hour later I received a call from my nephew telling me the paramedics were there and that she was gone. I miss them terribly, even after all this time. Losing them, I had no one to talk with over shared childhood memories, as my parents had passed also. All our plans for the future were lost along with them. Not a day goes by without thinking of them.
Brittany Leiot 🕊️
Forever 23 years young
She was born with biliary atresia and at the time of her passing was one of the oldest survivors.
The doctors did so much research on her that she said, "I'm tired of being a guinea pig."
I know in my heart that current BA survivors benefit from her medical struggles.
It's almost been 20 years and I've finally learned how to cry.
It took 18 years to acknowledge that as her baby sister, I have survivor's guilt. I pray that I learn to live so that I can honor her.
I lost my older brother almost a week ago to an unexpected allergic reaction... he was only 29. He had his entire life ahead of him. He was the most amazing, passionate, fiery, funniest, kind, and caring person I ever got to experience. I already miss you so much Ryan. He left behind his girlfriend and their newborn baby who was only 7 weeks old. His son will never get to personally know the truly amazing man he was, but he will know him through all of our stories and memories.
My younger sister and I feel somewhat overlooked and forgotten since his passing... everyone says my mom, dad, his girlfriend, and their baby are affected the most- but that's simply not true. We lost our older brother. Our protector. Our best friend. It's just not fair. No one truly understands the pain of what it's like to lose a sibling until it happens to them...
I just wish I had more time with him and made more time to see him and text him. What's helping me through this is my spirituality and I know he's still with me- I feel his energy and spirit and protection with me. I was just talking to him 15 minutes ago and then this video pops up in my recommended with 3333 views... thank you for this video Ryan. I love you always.
I relate to this so much, unfortunately. I'm so sorry for your loss because I understand the pain. My brother (only sibling) was 3 years younger, but BY FAR the more "grown up" of us two. He got his degree before me, he got a "real job/career" before me, got married, bought a house, and had kids before I did. (A 4 year old son and a 7 month old son - who looks EXACTLY like him, btw!)
I loved with my whole soul. He died December 15, 2018 after just turing 34 3 weeks prior. I struggled with addiction in my 20's and I really let him down on a repeated basis for years. I embarrassed him, caused him worry... but every time I got put in a hospital he was there. He dropped everything to be at my emergency intervention. He defended me when our mutual friends were critical of me and my choices/behavior/lack of progression in life. When his wife tried to take back my role as a bridesmaid in their 2011 wedding because between the time she asked me to be in the wedding to the time the wedding happened, I'd gone through the intervention I mentioned and to be there for me, my brother had to scrap plans they'd made for that day. She was literally furious over it and texted me just before I handed over my phone at rehab calling me "crazy Megan" and "ruining her life" (Yes, she's a vindictive entitled brat.) He told her directly, "If you take my sister out of the ceremony and embarrass her like that I'm not marrying you." (My brother and I shared the same large friend group).
At his funeral, I was a speaker. Despite being terrified of public speaking I just HAD TO do it. I had to do one last thing for him. I needed to atone for the shit I dragged him into and all the holidays I missed because I was too depressed to shower and do my hair. I am not religious but I just needed him to know the last thing I did regarding being part of his life, was to suck it up, face fear head-on, and speak of him with a farewell message that showed him how much he was loved and admired.
I said, in part, "I guess I hit the brother lottery when Adam and I got paired up. Sorry if you all are jealous. (got a laugh 😂) In my life, I have let my brother down. I have embarrassed him, caused him to worry... and he forgave me for all of it. I'm not a religious person, but I carry a belief that not only is the act of forgiveness a selfless gift from somebody, it's a gift that not all people possess the strength of character, the kindness of the heart, the grace to give. Not all people CAN forgive someone. They can say it. But my little brother forgave me for real. I did not deserve it. He was my life partner and I will always be "Adam's sister" no matter how much time passes after today." (Have on tape so it's literally what I said.)
Holy crap I am so sorry for this tangent I went on! I decided to leave it in case someone who maybe needs to hear something I said stumbles upon my words.
I wish you peace. ❤
*Adam Nicholas Kearns (1984-2018) Father, Husband, Son, Brother, Grandson, Cousin, Colleague, Mentor, Neighbor and Friend.*
Love you, Buddy. It should have been me, not you... NOT YOU. I will miss you for the rest of my days here on Earth. It should've been me, Buddy. I'm so sorry... I'd switch places in a nanosecond. People say that, but I mean it literally. I'd go this instant if you got to come back. Zero hesitation. It was never supposed to be you. You were so much more than I could ever hope to be. You were a better human by a million light years. I just miss you.
Are you okay now 😢
I relate to both of you guys so much. It’s been three months since I lost my big brother to cancer. He was only 26, and he was my favorite person on the planet. He was one of the strongest people Ive ever known, overcoming mental illness and addiction. I struggle as well but he was always there to pick me up from the hospital or visit me in rehab. He was more than my brother. He was my protector, best friend, and role model all in one. It only took four months to completely destroy all our lives. He leaves behind three kids under 4 years old, and it’s not fucking fair. My nieces and nephew deserve the amazing person that created them and loved them more than anything. I want to be here to tell them everything that he was but it hurts so bad rn
I just lost my brother last night. And it is about my mother. I have to be strong for her and my brothers children. I have to man up and 🎉deal with this on my own. To be strong for them. I must be the man that my brother would be for me. It’s not about me it’s about them and my poor brother.
My brother died a year and a half ago, age 41. He struggled with both depression and addiction for half of his life. After our mom died six years ago due to heart failure, he blamed himself for causing her stress, and he dealt with that by leaning on his addictions. I knew something bad was going to happen, but I ran out of ways to help. I gave up on trying. The bad thing did happen, and now I'm left with a big tangled mess of grief and guilt.
Just lost my brother suddenly. Autopsy needs to be performed. He is only 47. The pain is so unbearable.
💔 Sending a hug. I'm sorry.
My sweetheart younger brother Jonathan passed away 6 weeks ago. He was and is so pure & loving, gentle, selfless, without ego, quietly always taking care of others around him in the family, neighborhood, and work before taking care of himself. He had stopped responding to our Mom's calls and texts when our family dog who he loved and raised was about to cross the rainbow bridge. I thought it was strange he wasn't calling us back to fly here to visit her. In truth they passed away at the same time. But we didn't know until his building and police called us. He was only 41, and so much good life left to live and with us. I'm devastated he died alone. Your video spoke to my grief, angst, and guilt. We are a close loving family but I was waiting for a reconciliation that was supposed to happen when he visited us for our family pup and we were 1 month from visiting him. Our family friends and faith are getting us through. I had to search for sibling support because it's true I felt our sibling grief was forgotten. I want to say to you my sweet, dearest brother Jonathan, I and We Love You So Much ❤️ I wanted to die but I will live to care for what you leave behind and for our senior parents and our youngest brother. We will see you again soon and be reunited 💕❤️ 🐕🦺🐶❤️💕💗🌹
i lost my sister unexpectedly at the end of 2023. she was only 38. she had been sick for a week before being admitted into the hospital and 3 days before she got sent to the er, she had texted me out of nowhere to check up on me. it was like she just knew she didn't have much time left. it doesn't take the pain away after losing her, but i treasure that text from her now. it was one last time she was able to show she cared for me.
Rian N Caire, 02-28-2022. I miss that young man every damn day! I thank you for this video, it’s some validation to us siblings who have a hard time and don’t know how to tell our parents we are forgotten, and who have a hard time like myself asking for help and validation! Thank you! ❤️🙏🏻
It has been 6 years since my sister died. I haven't searched "sgrief sibling died" until now. I miss my sister more than any other. I hope I just have a chance to relax now that I am here. I hope to find something I can relate to. I am positive that I am not the only person who is looking this up, feeling lonely.
You are never alone, other person! 😌
I really wanted to hear this right know my brother died 2 years ago almost 3 and i'm feeling like It has been not progres on my grief I feel as sad as the first year so lonely but at the same time surrounded by a lot of people
I lost my brother a couple of days ago to hard-attack. He was my everything, he was a bestfriend and soulmate in so many ways. Always has my back and always stood up for me. The worst comments are when they only ask for everyone else than yourself of how one is doing after the death. Or when they tell me that «its gods plan» and so
My sweet sweet innocent big brother, who would always remind me that he is my big brother. Billy. William Matthew Tartanella. ❤
Please pray for him. He would have been 42 on April 5th.
I lost my beloved sister age 53 due to Covid complication in May 2021 . We were very very close from childhood. We used to Talk everyday . She was very spiritual . She was younger to me . Was our family support . I was Totally devasted . Was missing her very dearly , was crying all the time . She has 2 boys , I could not see my sister broken family . I was in too much pain. And then I lost my elder brother age 57 in Jan 2022 due to post Covid complication. I was very close to my brother too . I used to talk with my brother lot but since I was grieving I was not talking to him how I used to talk before . I didnot realize that my brother is also grieving . I feel very guilty for not understanding him. I could have. Help him somehow and he would be alive. I miss both of them so much. Not a single day pass without thinking of them and crying. They both were so dear to me. I feel so hopeless. Feel very lonely. Keep praying for their soul and ask god to give me strength.
Everything you said was everything I needed to hear. I can't thank you enough for your compassionate exploration of what you rightly call an overlooked grief.
You articulated a great deal of how I am feeling. You mentioned a double loss, and that is exactly how I am feeling. I lost my brother, but also my best friend 4 months ago. Nobody could make me laugh the way he did. I am feeling so lonely, despite the friends and family I have around me. My brother´s name was Dan. He was 42 years old, and died from complications of alcohol abuse.
I lost my brother Tony a week ago. He passed away from COVID-19. He had trouble breathing he thought he was going home the same day and he did not want to go on a ventilator but sure enough the nurse had him on it. His breathing got better but then his kidneys were failing. Then my sister in-law got the call that his heart stopped and they weren’t unable to revive him and he passed away. My family and I are devastated he was like a leader to the family and life of the party and he leaves behind his wife, 2 sons & 4 yo daughter. We are shocked thought he would be in our lives forever. We are doing our best to grieve and yes there are so many times we wish we can go back in time like we could of done something and he wouldn’t of died but you can’t bring him back. My sister told me, we have to look at the happy times. How he was with our family instead of looking at the negative. I know that’s what my brother would of wanted. Seeing family together. 🙏
So sorry for your families devastating loss.
I lost my youngest & only sister in Jan 2021.
I still cry most days.
James A. Massey Jr.
My baby brother my only sibling. He passed in tremendously tragic way by freezing to death. Police said his “friends” “had a choice to make of who’s life was worthy of saving and the picked the other guy not your brother”. The most disturbing statement I could hear. The 5 “friends” that stood on the ice in the UP in Michigan did nothing to help my brother. They waited 43 minutes to call 911 and first responders took 33 minutes to arrive! The “friends” have 7 literally 7 different stories of what happened none of their stories are remotely similar. They did t even bother to get my baby brother out of the water after pulling the other guy out. They now all 6 stood there while told me “we knew James was screaming in his helmet but bottom line is he created his own fate”!
I’ve pleaded with Delta County Sheriffs Department in Escanaba to do an investigation they flat out refused!
Our parents stopped talking to me altogether the after my brother’s memorial March 1, 2024! James passed from freezing to death on February 25, 2024! The “friends” told us he “drowned” however my brother had in a protective floating suit! When the death certificate was released is when we found out his actual cause of death and he had No Water in his lungs!
I am forever changed, forever heartbroken! My brother and I had an argument over the girl he was with she’s very much manipulative and lies incessantly. I was told James was going to come to my home this summer to make amends as he “didn’t like the way things were left with my sister all and all she’s my sister and I love her”. Although this is wonderful to hear I wish to God I could hear him say this, that we could apologize to each other and tell each other how much we love each other. The fact that we can’t eats at me the argument eats at me, the way he passed has me a complete mess yet I’m determined to get the proper authorities to do an investigation!! My brother shouldn’t have died in the freezing water on Days River Lake Bay De Noc!! These 6 “friends” had ropes and other life saving supplies the fact that they made a “decision of whose life was worth saving” has me so damn mad! Who were they to play God! Why didn’t they get James out of that water after getting Pat out???!! They should have pulled James from the water immediately as they did the guy right next to him! I can’t understand why they just stood there and deliberately did nothing to help my baby brother! The thought of his “screaming in his helmet he created his own fate” comment by a so called “friend”, the horrific fear he must of felt the torturous pain he must of felt haunts me!! My baby brother was a good man a good person he didn’t deserve this horror he was forced to endure at the decision of people he trusted people that were supposed to be “friends”!
I can’t understand our parents either! They just abandoned me as if I’m not allowed to grieve! My mother screamed at me in the phone while I was sobbing “Jennifer don’t take it so hard”!!! I’ve tried reaching out to them and they ignore my calls and texts. My mother is schizophrenic I don’t know if that has anything to do with this disowning of me. I truly believe that our parents wish it had been me. My brother was “their boy” I was always like a black sheep to them. I’ve been in grief counseling and took time off from work to try to get myself together. But I have memory loss that is not getting much better I’m told it’s from the trauma of James’s death and have been diagnosed with PTSD from trauma, bereavement, depression and even have had problems with nystagmus where my eyes will shake side to side really fast. The Dr says it’s due to stress but all this is just so hard and so much to try to handle. I’m scared to go back to work in 9 days because of my anxiety and memory issues. But I have to. I ask myself everyday what the hell really happened out on that ice?! I want answers and the “friends” now will not answer any questions. Nobody seems to have actual answers! There’s so many Why’s, What’s etc. I just can’t understand or get what James endured out of my mind.
Thank you for listening or reading.
Lost my sister Dionne 49 to Covid the day after Thanksgiving. My pain and grief is unrelenting. She was my big sister of 6yrs. I see her reflection as I look at my self in the mirror. Finding it hard to look at my mom or talk to her children. It's just an awful place. She had so much faith in God to heal...we all held this faith. She told me to just stay prayerful when we spoke last. I was the last to talk to her. My last words: I love you Dionne.
Thank you for going over the siblings issues. They had so much competition with me. Ended them all in rivaling me when our mother died. It was sick & still is since 2011. They were unable to acknowledge parental abuse of other siblings & grandchildren. Turned it into a war because the father/ mother put too much abuse into family. Parents were never accountable & turned the siblings against each other to hide their abuse. Parents played favorites with siblings that protected their lies & abuse/gaslighting others siblings. They never cared about the family. Only cared about abusive mentally ill parents. Lost my 5 siblings to feeling like they died after my mother / father died. They treated me like crap & rejected me each in their own way, kept me out and punished me, competed with me, lied constantly,were jealous of me, tried to provoke me, told me my parents didn’t love me etc etc… just unsupportive of my life & my children in every way, insulted my son & Godmother unjustly accused him, they all smear campaigned me, bullied me, told me I was never their for them when I was and did care for & loved them, they accused me of stealing from my mother after she died some crystal she gave me years ago,I supported them and their families, they were cold & sarcastic & cruel, & I visited them, they prevented me from having anything from my mothers house, they told me I had mortality issues when mom died because I was a little sad. they were so entitled & gave me garbage, they betrayed me, they were fake people to me, ganged up on me, abused me after funeral calling me names??? invited me for thanksgiving then had me sit away from the family with strangers, they insulted my cooking, they never asked-manipulated my father into buying them a house with the inheritance just before he died, they avoided contacting me, then they told me I did that to them. They are drunk & disorderly and abuse each other as well. Because I went no contact. I know it’s none of my business what others think of me. And anything others say about me does not reflect any truth about me but is actually a projection of who they are. Because I refused to tolerate their immature disrespect. I can go on & on.
I’m grateful for your message on sibling grief. My brothers name was Bill. He died four years ago of cancer at the age of 57. He is missed, but remembered fondly. 🦋
My brother just past away 3 days ago. His name is Miguel Angel Medina. He was living in the street for a while. He didn’t have a good relationship with our father, wasn’t allowed to in his property and he died outside the gate on the sidewalk right in front of his house. I was supposed go by my my dad that day, but I didn’t. And I feel like if I would’ve gone I probably would have found him alive or could’ve helped him. This pain is the worst I’ve ever felt. I will never be the same after this. 💔
My sister died 30 years ago this year. I was 17, she was 20 and in the USMC. Still feels like yesterday. Lost my brother to suicide in 2016. Never grieved as a family for either loss. I was in a bad place mentally for a long time but managed to somehow pull my head outta my ass. No joke, it’s truly one day at a time. Forgiving myself has always been impossible.
Lost my brother Michael when I was 19 and he 21 in 1978. Lost my youngest brother, Matt at 23 and I was 35 in 1995, lost my last sibling and brother Mark who was like a best friend and son in 2000. Now I am the only survivor of my family of origin since losing my father in 2015. Lost my only son, Michael at 29 one month after my father in 2015.
It’s very difficult to put all of this in perspective. You are the first person I have ever known to address sibling loss.
It has been over 40 years since I lost my
older brother Michael. I was telling someone about how he died and my parents reaction…and just started crying like it had just happened again. I have been resilient but after losing my son and father so close together and at the same time leaving my job and several other stressful events at the same time with the history of sibling loss, it seems I was free falling for years and it has taken me so long to come back. I still struggle with the aftermath of it all.
Thank you so much for what you do. I am learning so much from your videos and it all rings true what you are saying has very much been my experience.
🙏 Namaste
My goddness 💔💔💔 My heart is breaking for you. God bless you man. I hope you get to see them again someday.
due to traffikers aka cult my whole usa family is replaced by cult s lot and now they trying to kill me, i feel heavy loss,,,,, ❤ thanks for being here
My sister passed away on Sunday after battling cancer for 7 years. My heart is shattered. I want to be with her so badly. I don’t think I can continue. It hurts to much
I lost my only sibling..my big brother in 1990 it was a tragic sudden death...he was my soulmate...true love from the heart...it still hurts everyday...i lost my hero...i cant let him go...and i have been persecuted for my grief...they treated it as a mental illness and drugged me up and now i have scary voices that i cant get rid off without meds...i need my brother to protect me...and hes not here😢
Just lost my sister last week. We didn't really have a close relationship as she was with someone she shouldn't have been with. And we as a family blame him for her death caused by alcohol.
The last year due to an issue our relationship was very strained. But I never stopped caring about her. And the thing that is getting to me the most is in the hospital she was mumbling a lot but she clearly said my name at least 3 times. 😥 I was shocked as her son and our mam were there but she was asking for me. I just put my hand on her and said I'm here ❤
Lost my sister She was 27 I miss her so much She was like a mother to me It is very hard to my parents We lost her In 2019 going to 2020 It is very hard for my mother because my mother was very close cause that was her very 1st daughter and it will always be hard...💔 We still celebrate her birthday Every year We have pictures of her everywhere We talk about her and that's how we live She is not gone she is still here she is visiting us In spirit She is still around... We love her so much 💗 ❤️ 💓 It's very hard for the whole entire family
Her name was Gabby
You hit every nail on the head. I feel like I have lived 2 lives...and the one I previously lived ended the day my kid brother died. He was 36. Honestly, it took my joy, my security, and my only ally for when we lose our parents. I avoid my family now bc its so sad to be missing such a crucial piece. Forever changed and am afraid I have already lived my
best life. 😢 Im starting to forget his voice.
We went through 2.5 (or so) years of court proceedings after my brother was killed. He was trying to be a Good Samaritan, and was ran over 3 times in the process; thus losing his beautiful life….. we were raised to be good people and to help others. I idolized my brothers (both of them). I try to do my best to make my brother proud and maintain a close relationship with my family, but it cannot be denied that family dynamics change after a traumatic and tragic loss…. My family means everything to me and it’s hard not to be terrified of what’s going to happen next. Not being afraid to answer the phone when certain people call…… My brother, Rob was a good man. A wonderful brother and friend. And I miss him every single moment…
It’s been three months since I lost my big brother to cancer. He was only 26, and he was my favorite person on the planet. He was one of the strongest people Ive ever known, overcoming mental illness and addiction. It only took four months to completely destroy all our lives. He leaves behind three kids under 4 years old, and it’s not fucking fair. My nieces and nephew deserve the amazing person that created them and loved them more than anything. I want to be here to tell them everything that he was but it hurts so bad rn
I lost my little brother. I don’t know what or how to feel or move on. I have no good memories. But I didn’t get the chance to forgive him yet for all the abuse he’s done to me and my parents.
I lost my eldest sister 2 weeks ago, she was 70, we are all over 50 & our parents are long gone...It is so hard to cope with this big loss, as we all knew her from our birth, we grew up together & shared many good memories together ...She was our rock of stability our family matriarch...We are all in shock & grief from this...Thank you for this sibling video.
I lost my elder 72 yr old sister 1 month ago. I am 56 n single.After my mum pass away 15 yr ago, she is like a mum to me. Can u imagine losing your mum twice. Life is really so tough, u have to cope all over again. It is painful to be alive now and I hope I can be gone soon too.
My brother Geoffrey Alexander Arwood, 1970-2024, it’s been 4 weeks and I am still in disbelief.
My older brother passed away on Easter; April 9th 2023. He was 32 years old, he was a control technician at a chocolate factory. I was 24 at the time of his death, now I’m 25. He was my only sibling. Seeing my mom cry for him is so painful because there’s nothing I can to fix it. Last time I spoke with him we got into a huge fight and I feel guilty for saying mean things. I hope he forgives me. I love you Marcos (Marc) 😢
I’m so sorry for your loss. I lost my sister a month ago to Lake Michigan. It’s a pain i never thought I’d have to feel.
I wish i had more time with her and did all i could.
Please be well out there.
On may 3rd my brother Dominique Anderson was murdered in Pearland Texas. I miss him so much. We all do
My only sister, Helen died in February 2 years ago of cancer . She was only 1 year older than l . Up until 2 years ago ...l had an ally in the world ...our parents had already passed away . All we had was eachother left of our family of origin..When she died , l felt alone in the world ...We both had spouses and children .. Her spouse has been rather disrespectful to me in many ways .. her children have been distant ...perhaps all in their own greif. I dont know . I am just heartbroken. Thanks for listening.
Lost my brother 2 and a half years ago, the process is nothing like you can explain, not even going to try, I've not been the same person since, feels like my whole life is slowly falling apart even though I take positive steps forward.
My little brother Niels passed away on the same day as he was born, when I was just two years old. In fact, my earliest memory was attending his funeral and standing in between my mum and dad looking over his grave. I am currently 28 and have just begun to understand what this loss meant to me and how it has affected me. There is tremendous guilt, because I lived, so why didn't he? Unfortunately that question will never be answered. But I am determined to start dealing with this grief and start letting go of this immense pressure that I have put on myself all my life. To be the perfect daughter for my parents, to be the perfect older sister for my other siblings. It's finally time now to take care of me.
Yes, i just buried my older brother today in NY. I was virtual, while his girlfriend came on ZOOM to show me the whole funeral taking place. We were not very close due to many kinds of awful behaviors and abuse that went on between us since our childhood. So I kept away from him, then his girlfriend called me an hour before he passed away. We both immediately took care of all the details to have him buried properly. It has been very painful for me all of these years. I am mourning along with his girlfriend and hopefully we will remain friends.
I just lost my sister 3 days ago 😢my heart is full of loss.. sometimes the stupidest song makes me cry sometimes i don’t cry for hours then it comes 🖤🖤😭 i live far away from home but we talked every single day.. i feel regret that i didn’t go home while i had her in my life she supposed to come to see me next year 😢. She was only 19 years old.. it was a car accident it wasn’t her fault i just don’t know how not to blame god to take her away. She was so young and hard working everyone loved her❤ and now it’s just empty.. my husband is my rock he support me thru this 😢 idk what i would do without him.. i am talking with my mom and brother daily but i still find myself crying and texting her multiple times a day, i know she is not going to answer but it helps..🖤🖤🖤
My sister Jan died on Monday 2 days ago. Parents always teach you to look after your little sister, when they die there is a sense of guilt that you didn't stop them dying. It's ridiculous but it's a deep seated feeling.
Thank you for sharing. My sister lost her life at the age of 20 in Lake Michigan. It’s been so hard on all of us. I appreciate this video so much.
I lost my younger brother and only sibling who was 48 with 3 kids. He passed last June. Then I lost my dad in July..my moms been gone 34 years. I have never felt so mush pain. It feels like my heart was ripped out. I feel very alone.
Thanks for the encouragement. Nice well rounded sharing. I lost my sister Carol;,1 week ago. I feel it's compounded because she was the eldest & the leader of our pack of 4 kids & it was a sudden illness & she was gone in 3 months. I especially liked your closing remarks to reconcile your grief while finding your own new identity. Blessings to you in the name of the Lord!
I lost my sis n my best friend 2-3-2024 😢😢😢 I can't take the pain in my heart any longer 💔 😪 it's just not fair
thank you for highliting the many aspects of this loss. so different from any other form of
bereavement... my younger brother just passed unexpectedly, so a lot of what you point out I haven't yet had time to learn. It was only a few weeks ago. Yes, I am also noticing a drastic
change in my perception of time, both expanding and contracting. Your point about siblings having a shared unresolved future struck me. I am the oldest of six, so my own mortality and a sense of needing to stick around are clashing inside of me. I also had a near-death experience at 21, which most definitely gives my grief an undeniable twist. Your message touched my heart, thank you.
Thank you for sharing and giving words to feelings.
I lost my brother 10 months ago and this was the first New Year without him. I am rather unsupported from family (i.e. lowest on the pecking order). The best thing I have done with my therapist is the compassionate other exercise... Created my own imaginary perfectly compassionate person and used that imaginary person to comfort myself.
I lost my brother in childhood, though he was 12 years older than me and a (very) young adult when he died. I'm close to 40 now, and this video still brought me to tears at multiple points. This is the most well-rounded video about sibling grief I've ever watched, thank you for acknowledging so many ways this grief impacts us throughout our lives.
Abdulahi Osman. My beloved brother passed away at 23 in his sleep. I need to find a way to hold his memories in my heart
Such a young passing...🙏