"personal style" discourse! should we drop aesthetic labels & micro-trends? | Internet Analysis
Вставка
- Опубліковано 28 чер 2024
- internet analysis: personal style! // Check out Parade's summer sale! Use code FERG50 to get 50% off sitewide: yourparade.com/ferg50.
Full video episodes of Internet Analysis are available to watch/listen on SPOTIFY! Follow the show here: open.spotify.com/show/1lec8eA...
♥ Instagram: / tferg__
♥ Second Channel: bit.ly/tfergvlogs
TIME STAMPS:
00:00 - intro
2:40 - have tiktok & microtrends 'ruined' personal style?
4:58 - Parade!
6:48 - which fashion influencers can we trust??
8:43 - tiktok shop & the infamous black tie wedding guest dress
11:20 - the core-ification of everything
14:45 - perception, in-groups, subculture
16:45 - living the life vs just buying the aesthetic?
19:43 - I hired a stylist in search of my personal style
21:27 - my biggest issues with finding my style
27:45 - more advice!!
RESOURCES & REFERENCES:
• Body Image & "Flatteri...
• Deep Dive into the Kib...
• are "body type" tests ...
• "link in bio" & affili...
• I Bought The Same Dres...
• house flippers & the h...
How to do Nothing, Jenny Odell - bookshop.org/a/15495/97816121...
Coming back around on getting dressed (by Haley Nahman) - haleynahman.substack.com/p/16...
TIKTOKS FEATURED FROM:
/ gremlita
/ jennytarbell
/ itsdaniaraujo
www.tiktok.com/@officialmacro...
/ oldloserinbrooklyn
www.tiktok.com/@lildummydev?l...
/ s.s.training
www.tiktok.com/@pigmami?lang=en
heidsbecker
www.tiktok.com/@deadeyebrakem...
www.tiktok.com/@stephneusews?...
www.tiktok.com/@alioops?lang=en
www.tiktok.com/@elliot_duprey...
www.tiktok.com/@gigglysquad?l...
www.tiktok.com/@guyfieri.supe...
www.tiktok.com/@thatadult?lan...
www.tiktok.com/@infinitycutte...
www.tiktok.com/@thepaytonproj...
www.tiktok.com/@thatgingerpri...
www.tiktok.com/@em__sarah__?l...
www.tiktok.com/@emmkick?lang=en
www.tiktok.com/@jsanmiguel95?...
www.tiktok.com/@e.cxhi?lang=en
Tiffany Ferguson (she/her), 28 years old. #internetanalysis #personalstyle
Business Inquiries: tiffanyferguson@select.co
This episode was co-written by Sheriden Smith! - Фільми й анімація
PERSONAL STYLE, BABY! would love to hear what your most "YOU" items of clothing are!!
Mine is a black satin bolero from the 90s that I thrifted! I don't wear it often cause I'm scared of messing it up and also, it's quite extra lol. It feels so me tho, especially the puffy sleeves it has. Also, my giant spiked choker! It's my baby 🥹 I wear it anywhere and everywhere, even just the grocery store, the spikes are like 4-5 inches. It also doubles as self defense if I need it 🤭
mine are a pair of pleated green plaid trousers with a tapered leg
any of my childhood tees i still wear + thrifted grandma shirts :)
vintage-style offwhite blouse with poofy flowing sleeves, paired with a set of moss green trousers got me living my vintage/renn faire/somewhat cottage-core dream lol
I love circle skirts! It just feels great, and I love the twirl.
As someone who grew up poor and only wore hand me downs until I was in college, I don’t have a style and honestly, I don’t personally mind. Half the time I wear graphic t-shirts and jeans. I’m incredibly relieved I didn’t have to worry about clothing trends a kid, it seems expensive and tiring to keep up.
What kind of graphic tees do you get?
Having a style doesn't mean being trendy or spending a lot. Our outfits say things. You just told a story about what you usually wear and what your clothes mean to you. That sounds like a style. Even if you don't think about it very much, your jeans, your tees, and the art on your graphic tees, were all designed by people who put in a fair amount of thought. (For more information, see Miranda's "pile of stuff" monologue from "The Devil Wears Prada.")
You have more personal style than anyone who just buys every trendy item because it makes them feel something.
style can be communicated through the same outfits worn differently. Do you ever tuck in your shirt cause it looks nice with your pants? Or to look professional in an interview? Then you've styled yourself! Everyone has a sense of style, realising it is just down to how much time they spend thinking about it outside of getting dressed. Buying clothes isn't style, as the person above me stated
Same here. My wardrobe is mismatched: shirts, short pants, jeans of various length, and shein type of outfits for outings. I have depression so it's overwhelming and trying to put an intricate look together. I have gufted bags that I barely use
@@Aelffwynn I always thought a style meant a type look or aesthetic. I kind of have an eclectic style I suppose but you’re right, everyone has a style or fluctuates between them. Didn’t consider that, thanks for the insight
I think we are all WAY overthinking things. Once I became an adult, I realized that what I liked on other people and what looked good on my body were different things. Once I understood that my body is the only one that looks exactly like me I realized the point is to find clothes that feel and look good on me (to me, my mom disagrees 😆) and nothing else matters.
Now I mostly prioritize how the material feels on my skin (so only natural fibers), have worn the same clothes for 10 years and have been recently trying to learn how to sew my own clothes because I honestly hate everything I see in the stores now.
Same! I actually enjoy the kibbe method, seasonal analysis etc exactly because of it. I'm not shooting in the dark, I just buy what suits me and makes me happy, and if a trend happens to fall under this venn diagram, great. If not, I'll be wearing hot pink jumpsuits until the end of times
Natural fibers are impossible to come by at a inexpensive price point, so learning to sew is amazing.
I'm a teacher so it's sweet when my elementary students draw me and I get to see my "uniform" from their pov!
My kids once drew me with a skirt, although I had never ever worn a skirt to work. It was an insight.
I once saw someone comment “I’m boringcore and averagemaxxing. You couldn’t pick me out of a crowd” and I could not stop laughing
I'm NPC-coded
im giving ✨background character✨
Love this comment thread :)))
anonimaxxing
My most 'me' items? Anything I wear on the weekend :') I hate the way my work wardrobe takes over the majority of my life.
The reason I got into personal style was because I wanted to make my professional outfits feel more like "me."
I don't really have to dress professionally much anymore, but I've been enjoying learning how to make my practical outfits feel more fun.
same i wear a uniform and often dont have time to change after i get off work. upside people like fedex drivers and sometimes i get free food
True!!! Love finding work items that still incorporate my style, like in my profile picture. Love wearing that shirt in my regular life too!!! 🎉
SAME 😢
My job doesn't have a uniform exactly, but I work in a lab testing petroleum products, so my work clothes have to both conform to safety requirements and be something I don't mind getting dirty. With those guidelines in mind, almost all of my workwear is clothing that I don't love and feel like myself in.
I can't pick an aesthetic, and I kinda love that. I love dressing super emo one day, hippie the next, and super girly and frilly the day after that. It's more fun to be able to be multiple things and not limit myself to one aesthetic.
Yes I love this
This!!! I also cannot commit to one aesthetic, it’s way more fun to be versatile!
yep i can wear a frilly skirt one day then baggy jeans sweatshirt and ball cap the next. its an amazing form of freedom. no boundaries
me tooo! i always found it silly to have to fit in a certain style and aesthetic
You still have a personal style. There’s going to be cuts or lengths or types of shapes of clothes within those aesthetics that you gravitate towards. There’s going to be textures or material you avoid at all costs. Or, if you’re a rare person who isn’t bothered by ANY of these things at all, not a one, then that in and of itself is your style personality. 🤷🏻
I don't think everyone HAS a personal style. Just like how everyone takes photos but not everyone is a photographer, everyone wears clothes but not everyone has a personal style, and that's okay. Some people wear clothes as art or expression, and others wear clothes for comfort/practicality. Everyone will have some level of aesthetic preference, but that doesn't always amount to a style.
i think that depends on how you view what personal style is
I'm not sure I agree with you, because photography is an art, so the equivalent is not personal style but design or red carpet, where fashion is an art and not just clothes. Personal style would be more like taking photos one way or another, so most people (if not everyone) have it, just in different levels
i REALLY disagree as a fashion nerd lol. your clothes and the way you dress yourself absolutely say something about a person, even (or especially!) when they don't intend it. plus i'm sure there's pretty much no one on earth you could convince to wear Any piece of clothing. everybody has at least some opinions on what they will and won't wear, even if they don't dress explicitly for personal expression. caring more about comfort/ practicality does not mean that you don't have personal style, it means that that is your style! and you can still do work to uncover your preferences and make more informed decisions about your clothing that will help you feel better in your clothes. for example, discerning if you find tight or loose clothing more comfortable + if you have material preferences (like natural over synthetic) can help you decide if you'd prefer leggings or cotton sweatpants.
@@valentinevintel9814 Personal style is artistic expression as well. That's why I think it's an excellent comparison. People do photography at different levels, for different reasons. Some of it is purely utilitarian, like taking a picture of where you parked your car in a large lot to help you find it again when it's time to leave; at a few levels up from that people enjoy it as a casual hobby and put some thought into the basic principles of it to try to capture the beauty of some moment in their life; you also have a large middle level that includes people going out of their way to try to get excellent shots and people who do photography as a professional service (for example, wedding photographers or press photographers), and it's a blend of utility and artistic expression; and there's a highest level of abstraction where every aspect of photography is considered purely in service of creating a particular piece of artwork, and that's what I'd compare high fashion to, where all of the clothing is made for artistic expression and any aspect of clothing as a functional item is almost completely out the window.
@@jaylynn8630 I'm not sure all clothes can be considered artistic expression, since most pieces are no more than clothes. Style can be art, but the vast majority of people having a very distinct personal style just have it for personal taste and not as a form of art, like they have nothing to say through their clothes, it's just them being themselves
The crochet pieces I make for myself are my absolute favorite and feel the most "me" ❤ They are made to my measurements, in my favorite colors and I get to wear my art.
bestie yesss! nothing feels better than being wrapped up in the products of your own efforts..❤
So sweet, I love that for you guys ❤ I should start crocheting again
Good one! Me too 😁
i embroider on my clothes all the time and i feel the same way!
I knit and sew my own clothes and I agree, I adore the pieces I've made for myself. How else am I going to get a dinosaur tank top or a dinosaur hoodie as an adult? ;)
The concept of a collective loss of personal style is strange to me, just because irl I see so much more experimentation and uniqueness lately than I did before Covid. I feel like I'm living in a maximalism driven cambrian fashion explosion. Even emo is back.
The comparison to the Cambrian explosion is actually perfect, thank you.
I don’t think emo ever really disappeared, but it’s been sort of collected as an aesthetic now rather than a representation of the subculture which I find interesting, but for music-based subcultures specifically a lot of trends/styles are becoming more popular where a politically motivated and music based subculture is boiled down to “studded belts, black clothes, and eyeliner” which sort of muddles baseline understanding and morals behind those subcultures. I think goth is the best example of this lol but grunge, punk, and emo are also currently being heavily influenced and changed right now too
Ballerina in the chat chiming in: I think the thing that irks me the most about stereotypical ballerina-core trends is that they emulate the uniforms most of us wore in our early days of training, and those pieces are the opposite of empowering or comfortable to me. For most of us, those times involved a lot of mental and physical challenge as well as a huge amount of vulnerability (on the worst end of the spectrum, abuse) and growing up we felt like one of the biggest rewards of graduating and being hired as a professional was that we could wear whatever we wanted that was more comfortable and expressive. So I think our distaste for it is usually from a place of frustration that people cherry pick the aspects that they think are cute and get to do so without experiencing our difficulties or trauma that we associate with them lol. Which is the tiniest thread tying it back into being similar to aesthetics of marginalized people that are co-opted, but it’s pretty obviously not the same when it’s a hobby or sport you’ve chosen instead of a community you’re born into. The light pink tights and general prejudice against people in bigger bodies do also stem from white supremacy which is a less surface level reason to not like the popularization of it tho.
As a former ballerina I agree 1000% on this ❤
Yeah, I do modern ballet as a hobby and I'm fat, and many of the balletcore things that I wear (which is not all that much but still) are very pointedly not shown on bigger bodies. The fatshaming in balletcore is pretty common I've found.
!!!
i've had a boss say they found my style very confusing bc i enjoy switching it up btw a basic all black to really loud patterns and i'm like....i like all of it! why do i need to limit myself when i'm having fun!
i think people just need to get back in touch with their feelings and start thinking about clothes that make them feel comfortable and happy. or to realize sometimes clothes are just so you aren't just walkin' around butt naked and exposed to the elements (not to judge butt nakedness in any capacity)
you won't need to be dressed to the nines all the time to be loved and feel content. you can have that in a worn out tee and jeans too.
As a Canadian, can we talk about the struggle of having to deal with insane seasonal changes that mean I have to own at least 2 entirely separate wardrobes. Like, it takes me all winter to figure out my personal style and then once I finally do, oh look, it’s summer. Can’t wear those sweaters anymore. Then by the time I get comfortable with my summer clothes… oh would you look at that, it’s snowing!
I grew up in a warm country and moved to Canada like 2-3 ish years ago and I don't think I fully grasped how hard it is to dress during winter with the snow, and I live in a place that doesn't get as cold as other canadian cities get. I also have a high sensitivity to the cold, more so than the average person. Some days I just focus on not catching pneumonia, let alone dressing well. Last winter I thrifted a couple of really high quality wool coats that were my go-to and focused on accessorizing with fun brooches.
The decluttering videos, “If you haven’t worn it in the last 4 months, get rid of it” always get me! 😂 I’d be screwed by autumn, let alone winter!
I'm in Finland and relate to this so much.
I should probably chill tf out as a German with relatively mild winters but I still find it so hard to dress for four seasons. I need clothing for moderate weather, sure. But then also winter outfits that work for being outside for a long time, ones that work for inside AND outside on communting days and in summer how do I know whether I encounter a building with aircon or not (still kind of rare here)? It's a lot and even though the entire world makes fun of Germans for wearing functional clothing instead of emphasizing looks, I completely get it.
same for us New Englanders in US. One day we could potentially have all season in one day. Its really hard to juggle seasonal items.
You might not be a “fashion influencer” but the second you mentioned a pasta print from Parade I clicked buy so fast. Seriously I immediately went to the parade site and bought a pasta nightgown and headband. So thank you, I have been looking for pasta themed loungewear for years.
HAHA such a specific wishlist! Love that you finally found some pasta pieces
its definitely interesting finding out people are struggling so much with finding their style. i've literally always wanted to look like the carpet of a roller rink
Lol I know I feel like I've just intuitvely gained an idea of what I want to wear and go from there
Black tie wedding girl: why is she not GOING TO A STORE? Go try things on! Make a day of it and make it fun, in a shop with people who might know what to point you toward as appropriate options.
Because she'd have to pay more than slave wages for the items
@@Littlebeth5657 You're on point! I get not everyone can just spend more then 50€ on a dress but you can a) look for a fancy dress in regular stores and home for a sale. And b) buy second hand online from a store you can even return if it doesn't fit right. Especially evening dresses are there so much cause people wear them twice and then change size or style and sell them. You can get something decent for a steal or very very pretty for under 100. With maybe one hour of scrolling their catalog...
cant make as much content (and therefore money) off of that ! not to be cynical lol
if you ever want to know your personal style, start teaching! my kids come in with “ms marlena braids” and want to wear bracelets and rings on every finger 😭 they also come to me first thing when they have temporary tattoos to say that we’re matching!
For sure! Or you can be me with ombre blonde hair I wore in a braid and I was told I looked like Elsa at LEAST once a week, lol.
Maybe elementary level kids aren't the best to seek this feedback from. 😆
Electric Grandpa? Well my grandpa was an electrician- so I now know exactly what that looks like😅
Authentic electric grandpa core!!
I've been in the dark academia subculture since Tumblr days (no, it did not come from tiktok) and I've lived to see it become mainstream and then unlikable once again. To be honest, I love micro-aesthetics! This was already my personal style, but now with the name and the community, there is a marketing platform for companies to actually make clothes that I enjoy, whereas previously it was very difficult to find academia clothes for spring/summer seasons. I think when you're primarily producing and consuming fashion for media's sake as an influencer, it can really start to look like everyone is part of a micro-aesthetic and that they're all meaningless. But if you're actually just part of one of these aesthetics in your personal life, there aren't that many people in the general public who do it and you still look unique. But now you can actually find the clothes and have a few internet friends who bond with you over it. Some might say it's not really "personal style" if you're in a community but 1. none of us are actually unique and 2. I still have my own flair from within dark academia that makes me look different than others in the community (namely that I wear a lot of dark green which is not a typical color for the aesthetic)
couldn't have said it better myself
@LUCYDebDolly honestly I'm glad she did that. smart kids dress in lots of different ways. I just prefer the dark academia look but it's certainly not something that indicates your status as an intelligent person. i went to a really top boarding school for high school on scholarship and there was a huge variety in styles of dress
YES thank you for saying it came from Tumblr!!!!! ugh I hate that people think it started on tiktok
People think that dark academia started on tiktok?? *gasps in millennial*
Oh, I wish I had gotten into dark academia when it was on tumblr 😢
Normalise wardrobe code-switching! You don't need one defined style if you don't want, you can change it up! If I'm going to hang out with normies I go for the "millennial mum" look and if I'm going out with my queer friends I dress fruity as hell and the rest of the time it's "reformed emo" or "kid from stranger things". And I enjoy all those styles on different days, why limit myself to a single aesthetic?
I do the same thing. I like being a bit of a social chameleon. My personality is complex, and I emphasize different parts of it with different styles! One person can’t just be one note or one “core”
totally agree! our styles can be just as complex as we are! love the yoohyeon profile pic btw
@@sl0wtwn ahaha thank you
Exactly! I go from fantasy princess, to 50's housewife, to gym girly, to hippy, to joggers, to shapeless maxi dresses. Sometimes in one day. It's fun to have different styles to match your mood of the day rather than your personality.
THIS THIS THIS
i think about this stuff all the time because i work in a management position at a store for a large fashion retailer that largely makes clothes for young women and teenage girls. from what ive seen, the brand (and others like it) are struggling because rather than creating and setting the trends, they struggle to keep up with the microtrends (and usually over-invest in them). which directly affects each store and it’s staff who are too underpaid to deal with the constant pivoting. not to mention the decrease in product quality because of the quicker production required to keep up with microtrends.
it’s like they are relying entirely on the customer to tell them what they want the company to make- which isn’t how fashion historically works.
anyways- i’ve been approached by many a teenage girl asking me if we have “that top that’s really popular on tik tok” enough times i know exactly which one they are talking about. very different from the days of me just trying to find clothes similar to whatever alex russo from wizards of waverly place wore
this is a good point bc i think a lot of the loss of personal style is link in bio culture… teenagers just want to click to know the exact brand and item a person is wearing instead of hunting for a similar style that suits them and their lifestyle & price point (the hunting can also make you think about if you really want it that badly before you buy it 💀)
my “personal style” is a mixture of clothes that are colors i like (mauve/millennial pink, moss green/sage, think desaturated floral colors and anything that isn’t dark) and some vintage style dresses and skirts lol. i can’t imagine switching between aesthetics every month on a whim 😭 and in my attempt to be more eco-conscious, i barely buy new clothes, even if i would looove a closet full of vintage-style dresses and skirts (not that i can afford them). honestly my only advice for finding your own style is basing things around colors more than style - it’s always easier to find something you like if you have a palette to work with that you enjoy, rather than trying to find what style or cut is the trendiest at the moment!
I definitely agree with this I have a bubblegum pastel rainbow colour palette that I keep for all my clothes (although I have black clothes for school and work) it's nice because the colours feel like me :)
Yeah same, and if you buy within your pallette you can always match clothing, everything goes together.
Aesthetics are the ultimate symbol of commodification of the experience of growing up. Hear me out.
I'm currently reading a novel called Camilla, written in the 1790s. It's about a group of upper class young people (aged 15-21) coming out into the world. These characters have the SAME fundamental issues teenagers face today: insecurity, wanting to be accepted by their peers, being unsure of their identity etc.
What is NOT the same is how they solve these problems. Not once were any of their concerns solved by buying anything. On the contrary, characters that are too concerned with dress and fashion are seen as vain, and ridiculous. Instead, they lean on their family, friends and eachother. They do what feels right and learn from their mistakes.
My theory is that aesthetics are just yet another attempt to solve the problems of young adulthood through consumerism. Buying into a subculture helps to create a sense of community and belonging. And these days, it's easier to purchase than it is to socialise.
The only problem with aesthetics as a form of self-expression and connection, is that it's ultimately shallow. You cannot connect with other people purely by owning the same stuff as them.
Unlike the teenagers of the 1790s that are the subject of Camilla (and young people in the past in general), modern young people are mainly connecting with others not through shared experiences, but through things that symbolise belonging to a specific group.
Whether that shift is positive, negative or neutral, is up for debate. All I am saying, is that the shift has happened.
My two cents as someone who has had a personal aesthetic since I was a young teenager, is that having a strong sense of personal style actually does help with connection, but not just connection with other people with the same style. I'm an awkward, neurospicy person, and I don't initiate conversations with people very often. But the fact that I'm dressed like a 1950s Ms Frizzle invites a lot of other people to initiate a conversation about my fun outfit, and it can sometimes lead to deeper friendships forming down the line. A strong sense of style can be an interesting icebreaker. I don't often run into anyone with a similar style, but I did at the coffee shop a few months ago, and now we're crafting together and forming a friendship. The whole conversation was started because she complimented me on my outfit, which got us talking about our mutual interest in historical fashion and then our crafting hobbies.
Just throwing this out there because I do agree that if a young person thinks finding their sense of style is a necessity for "adulting," you're so right that that is not going to work and playing into consumerism. If someone is expressing themselves this way because it's just more fun and easier than trying to fit in, it can end up leading to deeper connections in an interesting way some of the time.
I have a strong sense of personal style and that's really worked for me. I get asked a lot about where I shop, but the truth is that it's not about where I shop. this year, I've had a rule that any clothing I get has to be either secondhand or I have to make it, and it's actually been so much easier to stick to that rule than I realized.
Something that has helped me recently is to have my list of non-negotiables for any piece I purchase from here on out.
* Pockets. I love pockets and I am done living without them. While of course not every item will have pockets, at this point there is always a layer, sometimes two, that has pockets.
* MUST have fabric that is majority a natrual fiber, I live in a famously hot and humid place. While being cooler, these fabrics also tend to stink less than bacteria throwing a party on some polyester.
* Comfortable fit. I am not being pinched or squeezed by anything any more. If it's uncomfortable, I will not be wearing it regularly, no matter how much I like the look. I practically gave up pants and I do not miss them.
* Sticking to silhouettes I like. I like stretchy and flowy fabric on my body and to be covered enough that I can move any way I please and not risk flashing folks. I like to contrast this with a more structured jacket or vest.
While I have less clothes than ever before, I actually really feel excited to wear them. I can mix and match the strutured elements with the flowy element so even though im wearing the same dress in different colors, it feels different with swapping outer layers, hats, and other accessories.
And I feel the most me in these clothes. These non-negotiables mean I am TRULY comfortable, I feel happier and look more relaxed, which naturally boosts confidence. I find that by focusing more on my experience of wearing the clothes, than how others percieve me looking in them has led me to a wardrobe that is ACTUALLY me and elevates my experience in life.
I love this because I follow the SAME rules! I want my items to be comfortable, I stopped wearing jeans like, 10 years ago because I hate how uncomfortable they are. I basically live in leggings now because I want to be able to move and not feel like I’m being squeezed to death 🤣. I also love flowy fabric, most of my clothing is some form of a dress. I even have “house dresses” for when I’m in goblin mode and I’m working around the house/ garden. I’m too old to be worried about something slipping or falling out.🤣
It's fun to follow a theme or name your outfit, but tiktok, as always, takes this SOOO far it becomes completely ridiculous 😂.
Everyone seems to label themselves. It's weird there
Here's how my mum taught me to shop for clothes and it's helped me
- if you don't love it or need it, don't buy it
- think about what the elements of the clothes you do love, what is it you like about these garments, and make the most of it when it's in style
- if you really love the way you look in a piece you're not going to care that much if it's on trend
- if you feel tired with an item put in the back of your cupboard for a couple years and then revisit and you're still not feeling it, donate it
- the only persons opinion that really matters on your sense of style is your own
My favourite clothing piece is one i got second hand, it's from a french brand and it's a little summer dress with a 50s inspired cut and simple print
As someone older who isn’t easily influenced because I avoid most social media like the plague I say what what you feel the most comfortable in. I have a basic asf uniform most days wide leg jeans/pants and a button up. I feel comfortable so automatically I feel confident. I don’t mind that my closet is mostly basics it is what it it is. I’m an earring girl and that’s what usually stands out for most people when I get compliments. You kind of have to understand and know who you are to get to the personal style of things. Trying to fast track it by copying aesthetics is a cop out. Just love and life will help give you some of the answers.
I love looking for quirky pieces at thrift stores! I do thrift basics as well, but the real fun of thrifting is finding weird shit
I’m sending you iron absorption thoughts!
I’m a 90s goth, which is very mall goth but also 90s teen girl silhouettes in black, or white and black stripes. I pretty much only thrift and I definitely lean on my favorites. I have a recognizable, specific style but it came from only wearing black tshirts and jeans for like 5 years and finally seeing that I was bored of it and craved flouncy sleeves, rivets, and peplums.
Your video made me think about the ongoing discussion about goth being a music based subculture and the validity of goth aesthetic from people who dont listen to the music. I always get excited if I see another goth in the wild because I feel like we’re flagging when we wear goth stuff. But I also am not harmed whatsoever by goth aesthetic on people who dont listen to the music. I listen to enough goth music to make up for those who don’t.
I found my personal style and developed it little by little over the years, only for people to tell me it's cottagecore. "You look like a witch living in a cottage," "You give off the vibes of an ISPY book," "You seem ethereal," "Earring lesbian with cozy vibes."
What I would give for someone to just tell me they like my style instead of associating it with an internet fashion label :') Don't get me wrong, those are all complements but I feel like my part and effort to look good (without actually looking at social media as a copy and paste template) seems dismissed in a way.
Overall this is silly to complain about how I want personal credit for my own silly outfits that I wear but oh well😅
I buy a few basic things on Amazon... tank tops, robes, sweats... but most of my actual going out clothes are from thrift stores collected in the past 20 years. Comfortable mom is my aesthetic.
Most “me” items are ironically my mom’s and my grandmother’s pieces lol. Very kindly, they pass on their vintage/old clothes or they just give it when I say I like them and I combine them with modern pieces. I have actually shared with them that when I wear their clothes I feel supported and comforted because I remember them wearing these when I was a kid and admiring them so much❤ Also the fact that cloth quality was so good that my mother could keep clothes that were not high end or anything in perfect shape for 30-40 years speaks volumes. But that’s another tangent.
"Normcore Pagliacci" 😂😂
My question about personal style: why does everyone need to have one? I don't think I have a personal style, and the idea that it would be important to me feels so strange. I certainly love my clothes and like to dress well, but different days call for different things. So why have just one style?
thats another aspect of it; the idea that we need to perfectly fit into one singular box. but its impossible. humans are too complex, we're always changing and learning new things. we're eventually going to grow out of the label we decided will define us. or at the very least, we will expand the label to include more aspects into it to make it less narrow. but even then, i totally agree with not sticking to one singular thing, its too suffocating.
I use Pinterest a little differently. I search for clothing items I own on Pinterest (like "green sweater") and look at the different ways people style them. Usually, I can recreate a couple of the looks with other items I own and I pin those looks. This way my Pinterest board is less aspirational and is more of a reflection of my personal style.
You may look like a mormon mommy vlogger but you are my comfort channel. I love your videos and get so excited when you post a new one!
So, my mother has always shared the thought that Iris Apfel was known for: "Fashion you can buy, but style you possess. The key to style is learning who you are, which takes years. There's no how-to road map to style." Fashion is always changing, and trends are always evolving, so when you're trying to keep up with that, you don't have time to settle into or understand what it is you truly like, versus the impression you're trying to give by keeping up with fashion trends. I grew up with hand-me-downs, but I also grew up with a mother who was widely known for her sense of style. She is glamorous in formal-wear, but her streetwear is quite smart and sheik, but effortlessly. Don't get me wrong, she has a ton of clothes and shoes, but she mastered repurposing pieces in so many different ways, that you'd be none the wiser that she was repeating. With that example, I learned to use what I had efficiently. Repeating and repurposing. I eventually started building my own wardrobe, and buying investment pieces, staples, and working around them, but also finding things that I could use interchangeably throughout my outfits. I don't know what exactly my style is classified, but my staple are suspenders. With jeans, shorts, dress pants; I'll style them casually with a t-shirt, maybe a graphic tee, polo, or dress it up with an Oxford/dress shirt. My shoes range from corduroy, to leather, to canvas. I enjoy my style, and I feel like it evolved with me as I get older, and look for more comfort, or for clothes that transition better from work to play, things that reflect me and my lifestyle. Like Iris said, it takes time, and cultivating a relationship and understanding with yourself. What YOU want, what YOU feel comfortable in, and what YOU can wear for as long as possible.
I love how your mother’s street wear was “sheik”. One Chic Chick. 😉
I grew up not poor, but definitely lower middle class. My parents had my grandparents as a safety net, but my bag lunches growing up were always crackers and peanut butter and an apple. I also went to schools with uniforms up until college. I feel like those two factors allowed me to form my own sense of style. I wear what I like, I decorate how I like, and I love it ✨
I feel like one of my talents is using what I have to create great spaces/outfits. Also just the basic skill of being happy with what I have.
I have tattoos of things I loved at the time but I no longer love that thing irl but I still don’t regret the tattoos because it’s where I was at in life when I got it, it’s like a human scrapbook
I was always wearing hand me downs as a child. But I loved them, 80s Adidias turqouise, violett tracksuits, volleyball team sweaters, etc. My most "me" item would be any sweater that has the 80s bowling-alley carpet or bus seat fabric patterns!
You’re one of my favorite commentary channels because you make videos based on topics rather than individual people. You always have nuanced takes and the topics are always relevant, interesting and well researched!
at the part where you’re talking about your channel seeming “boring” compared to other commentary youtubers. I actually look forward to your more down to earth style!! I love costumes and setpieces, it feels like watching a live performance (but educational). With your videos it feels like catching up with a very knowledgeable friend! Both are different, but still have their own strengths. I don’t think the big performances are necessarily the “highest form” or what you should be striving for (unless you want too), its just a different way of presenting information. You gain a different experience watching a live show than catching up with a friend. None is necessarily lesser than the other, just different!! Love your videos!!
i feel the same way, her videos are perfect for cozying up with a blanket and it's a unique vibe that always keeps me coming back
I only found my style when I stopped buying new clothes and started thrifting (while still being mindful about not over-consuming). I love natural fibers, particularly linen and silk, and I’ve gotten the coolest pieces secondhand. My friend described my style as “bougie whimsy goth” which seems like a good fit. I’m also in my early 30s and my style was all over the place throughout my teens and 20s - experimenting is half the fun, just don’t buy something super expensive until you have a good sense of what lasts in your wardrobe! The best part about having a cohesive style is how easily you can mix and match pieces - it helps eliminate the urge to shop because there are always new options to explore in your closet.
As someone who (as a teen) would regularly fall into new “aesthetics”, I think micro trends are incredibly harmful. When I was following trends, I’d often buy cheap items that were not made to last. I just wanted to be able to follow the trend quickly, like everyone else. I wasted so much money on clothing that went in the trash. In recent years, I’ve taken a step back from social media and it has helped me grow my personal style. It’s amazing how fast I stopped caring about trends after that.
I still love shopping, but I buy almost all my clothing second-hand and I try to buy ethical items. I’ve scored a lot of good pieces of Depop. Part of how I do this is by looking for specific brands I like, not looking for aesthetics or trends. I was able to get TWO ‘Dale of Norway’ sweaters for less than $150 (they are normally hundreds, each) because a lot of people gave up on their “dressing like and old person” trend.
the only fashion influencer i ever really followed and took advice from is/was ashley bestdressed. she doesn't post on youtube anymore but she posted a lot of styling tips and outfit ideas that resonated with me (and still do) because she gave you ideas on how to use the stuff you already own and stuff like what's versatile which is useful. she's clearly not pressed for cash anymore and her wardrobe has evolved in accordance with that, but i think her style evolution is a pretty interesting case study because she developed her style without the ability to just buy shit whenever she felt like it and the outfits she posts now genuinely seem like stuff that someone who actually HAS a sense of style would wear. because she's clearly spent the time and effort thinking about the types of clothes she wants to buy and collect and alter. following trends is what you get when you want to be involved but are not putting in the thought to figure out what you personally want to wear
I went thru a lot of identity shifts and also some major health complications in 2020/2021 and as someone who works in the fashion industry and like it's my job to have a POV these are all things I have been thinking about a lot lately!! I have soooo many private pinterest boards for work where I curate images for communicating concepts to make things digestible for all of the Gen X people I work with but am just now starting to create boards again that inspire my own personal sense of style. And it is absolutely WORK but so worth it. Went to Goodwill the other day and was trying on a bunch of stuff in a corner with my bestie and a bunch of other women of different ages since there weren't any fitting rooms- it felt like the most neutralizing ground of girlhood lol. It was honestly so fun and something I used to do more during my teen years. I feel like myself and a lot of my friends in our late 20s are all going thru a "second puberty" and getting to know our bodies and how to dress them now vs when we were teens.
My uniform is black boots, black fishnets, black shorts, black crop top sometimes with a vest. My friends daughter drew me and nailed it. I've always wanted to adventure outside of that so it's comforting to hear that it's a good thing.
When I was in middle school I had a blue hoodie that I wore every day, I had to get rid of it because the person who gave it to me never really treated me correct, at the time that person did mean the world to me though ( doesn’t really matter for this story ) anyhow I loved how beat up that sweater was, every stain on it represented a memory to me, I hope I can come across a piece I care for that much again.
When I was in middle school my uniform was a 1930s old school uniform blazer and a Columbo coat that for some reason was in my mother’s hall closet. This was the early 70s. Still look for replacements in my size to this day.
mina le has such a wealth of knowledge in fashion, i learn so much from her. you both do amazing work in bringing attention to social and cultural issues! 💖
I did Mandy's 75 hard style challenge and honestly it was the push I needed to get rid of clothes that I couldn't make work or I wasn't gravitating towards. I really like the idea of a style "thesis"!
I realized that athleisure was a cop out for me. I started finding other comfortable clothing that I ACTUALLY liked
yeah i never understood why people say that they exclusively wear athletic clothes and sweatpants because it’s comfortable. there are tons of other clothes out there that are extremely comfortable and actually look put together. wearing bummy clothes in public makes me feel uncomfortable and self conscious. plus i don’t find tight athletic clothes comfortable at all
Sometimes I feel like throwing my whole wardrobe out and starting over😂 So many choices🙌🏾
I’m in my “personal style” once a week otherwise I’m using the what’s clean styling technique.
The purpose of trends is to keep you buying new things constantly so companies can make the most profit possible. The only things that should matter with your personal style are: 1) do you like it? 2) Is it comfortable? (price, fit, and works for your lifestyle) and 3) does it make you feel confident? That's all. Everything else is irrelevant unless you care about "fitting in".
I've had a semi-formal personal style for many years now, and it doesn't really get swayed much by prevailing trends: I mostly wear either plain or subtly-patterned T-shirts & shirts(both long and short sleeve) in summer and long-sleeve shirts during winter, while mostly wearing either jeans or dress pants as well as dress shoes & loafers all year long, and on more formal occasions I augment a tie, waistcoat and/or blazer. I only wear sneakers & sportswear when actually doing sports. *The reason for this is to keep myself alert and awake (espcially in winter) atop the fact that such a style really suits me.* Despite this my clothes aren't that expensive, but usually mid-range of a fairly decent quality that last for 3-4 years- in fact, I've seen quite a few sweatshirts (something that looks bad on me) costing twice as much as my shirts in sports store chains!!
Also I have seen a lot is people labeling styles that already have a label. Like I wear decora fashion (which is a J fashion style that’s been around for about 3 decades) and a lot of people have come up and asked if I’m wearing kid core. I’ve also seen people use photos to show a new core or trend, using images of people wearing an already established alternative fashion.
I feel like I had a really solid sense of my style a few years ago. I was always wearing cool, unique thrifted pieces, and I was working at a job where I could really easily express my style. I worked at a paint your own pottery studio, and I didn't have much of a dress code, plus the apron always tied my outfits together so nicely. Now, I'm working a desk job from home and I'm so much more focused on comfort and practicality that I feel like I've lost my style. I have also been recovering from an ED and it's difficult to dress myself when my body is changing.
Anyway, here's some things I like to wear:
- big cozy knit sweaters
- long flowy skirts - especially interesting or unique ones
- oversized button up shirts
- I love my docs
- I have a signature red heart necklace that I wear most days
As a heavily tattooed person trust me when I tell you getting tattooed will not make you feel complete. There’s this phenomenon where every time you get a new tattoo all you see is the rest of your empty spaces and it makes you feel so naked and you never feel like you’re tattooed enough
I've slowly realized that, at this point, I like combining a traditionally masc piece with a fem one. "Masc grandma" is the phrase I've been using lately to describe it. Getting a big black/grey ink tattoo of wildflowers on my arm was also a GAMECHANGER. I love it. I feel hot. I feel "me" because gardening is a favourite hobby of mine. Paired with curly hair and bangs, I felt like you gave me an indirect compliment on my personal style!
Aww I love that!! And curly hair is my fav, I’m jealous!
I think something that helps folks develop an opinion and find things that make them feel more themselves is starting to think about style as self expression.. aka ART! Then we can look at our styling choices through the lens of design - contrast, movement, balance, etc.!
& BIG +1 to the Haley Nahman quote!
+
22:22 I love that your videos aren't flashy! They feel so cozy and down-to-earth :)
I think however you’re the most comfortable IS your personal style. You don’t have to throw together an unconventional outfit for it to be personal. Jeans and a t shirt can be your personal style if that’s what you truly enjoy wearing.
tiffany i watch every video you make. i have cited you in multiple school essays both in high school and college. i use you as a podcast and you are comforting and perfect and it’s always smart enough for me to care but put well enough that i can be really fucking high and still understand it. thank you for your unique and well-researched topics
Out of all the commentary channels I run to yours whenever you upload. I love your 'set design'! There's something so calming about your channel and congrats on la bebe 🩷
I think most ppl personal style tends to be influenced by what they wore in high school/early 20s, a refined version that includes hairstyles, make up and how you put an outfit together … maybe it’s just me
I just want you to know how much I value & appreciate your opinions in these video essays. This is something I’ve been thinking about for awhile now but was having a hard time articulating. Within the first 5 minutes of this video i thought to myself huh it really is okay that I don’t dress like everyone else because I enjoy what I wear even if that varies day to day. We’re just people not the box people try to put us in. So much love to you ❤️ keep doing what you love and that’ll never lead us wrong
I’ve never been this early! I’m so excited for this one as I was literally in the middle of binging your content.
It changes with the seasons how much I feel authentic in my style. Every summer reminds me of how much I rely on layering to feel like myself
But when you see someone with personal style it becomes so obvious! My mums best friend has such unique style that doesn’t fit in one aesthetic but that she loves and that I can see things at the thrift store and think “Rachel would love this”. And I would love to have something like that!
I find personal style for me means clothes that get me through the day successfully, in my case I used to be a super fashion focused kid and have grown to lose that sense of my identity so trying to rediscover it and balance it with my actual day to day routine has been interesting. Stopping your shopping or slowing it down is how I believe the only way to really find it is, to work with what you have and recognize those patterns. It's all science baby and we have to test the actual potential results. Not everything will be a success but trying new things from what you have and getting a negative or positive reaction for that day and taking a moment to acknowledge "Oh I didn't like wearing this out because I felt x reason" or the opposite. This can be a really fun challenge, I have a really colorful closet but recognizing the actual tones I am wearing and how they can pair together has made my day to day outfits really exciting. (I also wear a uniform for work, so excess clothes buying isn't necessary because I am wearing the same thing a good chunk of the days)
Clothing was so fun for me when I was young and couldn't drive or leave the house and had excess time to prioritize my appearance. Now I have places to be and my priorities are just different. I used to not be able to go for an unprepared walk because of heels and thick fabrics so instead of the attempted style and version of myself I wanted to be seen as I prioritized the action version of myself who can look good while being prepared for a wider attempt of things during the day and still feel like myself. Now I know what fabrics work for my day to day, what colors I enjoy, and I do store stuff away just so that it gives the item time to excite me again in the future. It's one bin full of majority off season stuff and a few items that I'll give time to cook.
I also do go out dancing and that truly is my time to express myself in a more exuberant way. It gives me the satisfaction of high tensity dress up time and then the release of more relaxed fits during the week. and monthly to bi monthly dress up time to explore certain things in private. Its all balance, play, and experimentation baby :)
Tiffany, Mina Le and Jordan Theresa. My holy trinity of video essays 🙏🏻💕
tiffany your the only mormon mommy for me !!! lmaooo great video as always
I believe they call themselves latter day saints now
I always liked to be intimidating, so Goth and Punk were always my go-to aesthetics. At some point in 2012-2016 I found out about Pastel Goth and that just became my objective. I guess I was tired of feeling unapproachable and not really that feminine the way I was dressing. In 2022, a whole SIX YEARS LATER, I was browsing my favorite alternative clothing website and they had an entire collection of lavender clothing and accessories. ON SALE, ALL OF IT. Girl I bought 2 combat boots and some platform mary janes (+ my new wallet), all lavender. And then, I realized I had NOTHING to pair them with. Maybe a buttoned shirt that had some lavender details. And now for 2 years I have been buying lavender clothing so that I can match it with my lavender shoes and my black and white wardrobe. Now I have 2 pairs of pants, 3 cropped tops, a crewneck and 2 pairs of socks for good measure, all lavender. And by God do I feel SO INCREDIBLY CUTE in them. Went to the movies with an all-lavender fit yesterday, and I am still happy about how cute I looked. Moral of the story - if you ever find something that brings you joy, make it a long term project. Your opportunity will come!
I think there's also a huge component of sexism in fashion as well. Like after a super trendy style runs its course, it gets labeled as basic or too millennial/cheugy. You could be trendy 2 months prior but then if too many women have a certain piece of clothing, that item is now "basic". Example: the denim vest that would have been super cute at any other point in time but now is not because of that Noah Kahan concert tiktok. Even becoming too alt in 2020-2021 was becoming "the new basic".
It feels like there's almost a societal expectation to be ahead of every trend as women and immediately discard the object as soon as too many other women acquire the same piece.
Love the last point that you made about fashion potentially leading us to overestimate clothes and underestimate people. I love fashion but def a good point always keep in mind!!!
I think I just need to admit that my style is just: polished hair, makeup and accessories with a uniform. I’ve been in a uniform most of my life and now at my work.
I'm confident I could easily nail down what my personal style is, BUT I do find that I often like to dress outside of it. I like to sometimes wear a "costume," an outfit that would look normal on someone else but feels inauthentic and out of place for me. Depending on my mood and where I'm going, it can be fun! My style is modest, with classic materials like linen, wool, and leather, lots of neutral tones with pops of floral colours. Big blocks of colour with almost no patterns, and delicate gold jewelry. But if I'm going clubbing, for example, I'll choose to show more skin, wear more colors and patterns, and jewelry that doesn't match my usual outfits. Or if I'm having a bad day I'll sometimes wear more eye catching pieces so I can feel pretty and get compliments. I think this is okay! Dressing 100% within your personal style is really helpful to avoid overconsumption and save room in your closet (and wallet), but as long as you're making smart choices I think it's okay to have "costume" pieces! (Bonus points if you let your friends borrow things!!!)
Haven’t finished the video yet but as a long time viewer (for the past few years I think?) I love that there are more videos coming out more frequently lately!
I have some pretty strong fashion opinions (those furry Chanel mules that were everywhere a few years ago? Couldn't stand them, I called them Chewbacca slippers. I also never got into peplum tops & dresses, and I've left the dad jeans in the fitting room because they just don't work for me), but I'm not sure that's enough to call myself 'fashionable.' While I love dresses, skirts and pretty flats, in reality, I value my comfort more than anything. I try to look put together by wearing elevated blouses (with interesting necklines such as square or sweetheart necks, frilly sleeves, satiny materials, etc.) and pairing them with well-fitting jeans. My go-to places for nice tops are Express, Loft & Banana Republic, and most of my jeans are from Hollister. That's become my go-to style because it's comfortable yet looks good, regardless of whatever new aesthetic becomes trendy.
I was dark acadamia for 3 years, but then i found out it was making me feel depressed and not smart enough. Now i wear flower maxi dresses and imagine i live in a Jane Austen book😌 Getting bangs helped me a lot too, with finding my personal style.
I've heard in a youtube video that talked about finding your art and drawing style: your style is how you do things. How do you draw ears and eyes? If you do it often, that is your style. And I think that applies to style as well. What you wear often IS your style. You can change it, but you already have a style. I think that this is a great starting off point. Having a style you can change at least to me is easier than floating around in nothingness, grasping for an elusive imaginary style.
I enjoy your very normal video style. Its one of the reasons I have been a sub for so long :)
rather than creating a pinterest board with other people's nice outfits (which becomes aspirational as Tiffany mentioned, and might not suit your body) i went through my camera roll and starred the pics where i felt my outfits made me feel the best in the past 3 years or so, and now i can clearly see a pattern. this helps me reduce the desire to purchase new things and also guides me when i do need to shop :)
What… everyone has a personal style, whether it is intentional or not, effortless or try hard, bought or donated. Everything you wear says something about you. Whenever you buy an item of clothing or an accessory for someone your FIRST thought is if you can picture them in it and if you can’t, you decide not to get them it…. that’s because everyone has a style.
This is so on point. I always wonder whether something is my "personal style" or whether it just looks good on someone else but wouldn't be my thing...
All the girlies are dropping bops today!!! Great work Tiff 💜
Saving this video for when I can finally start testing out what outfits make me me
working at a resale shop has helped me figure out my TRUE personal style and i will be forever thankful for it
As someone who is also currently pregnant, it honestly made me feel so much better to hear someone else talk about how it’s hard to have much of a “style” during this time because of all the body changes.
I’m very fortunate that I’ve already been very into stretchy and breathable fabric, so it’s only been within the past month or two that I’ve needed to add a few pieces to my wardrobe. And I’ve been very intentional to mostly look for clothes that I could still see myself wearing after my pregnancy.
I’ve been trying to stick to a mindset of a very condensed wardrobe of clothes that I’m still comfortable in. I won’t buy it if I don’t feel good in it. In only a few cases have I purchased true maternity clothes (aka pants), and that was strictly out of necessity (like buying one pair of maternity shorts because I only had one other pair that fit comfortably, and with how hot it’s been I cannot wear pants everywhere).
I LOVE fashion, and have a few “genres” that I like to balance between. But in my current phase of life, I cannot afford to meet all those desires without spending money that I don’t need to spend. My “most myself” styles will just need to sit on the back burner for a bit, and I can balance with clothes that I’m still comfortable in.
The most quintessential "me" outfit i have is a plain white long sleeve shirt, blue cotton overalls with a dasiy embroidered on the front and funky socks. The overalls are from Tree of Life and was a gift from my aunt :)
Some personal thoughts on you saying that your videos seem too “boring” compared to other video essayists/fashion influencers: I’ve been watching your videos since high school and im about to graduate college. i love the consistency, and tuning in whenever you posted was honestly one of the highlights of my week back in the day. Even though your videos might seem “simple” in comparison, it’s always evident as a viewer how much thoughtfulness and research you put into them all. that’s what has kept me around so long :) the setup doesn’t need to be as interesting when what you’re saying is so captivating. But, on the flip side, I’ve always just thought you were so beautiful! I’m definitely listening to what you’re saying, but sometimes i just look at the screen like “wow, she is so pretty!” haha. If you read this, just know that you’re doing amazing and as an Anthropology undergrad your videos are always sooo intriguing and full of the best little bits of knowledge on the Internet. Wishing you the best always, congrats on motherhood 🥹🩷
I'm a 90s grunge era gal. Idgaf what people think of my dress. I dress grunge or rocker. A lot of my everyday pieces are band t's, ripped jeans, flannels, oversized band hoodies with Doc Martens, combat boots, or Vans. Dark esthetic jewelry pieces when I even wear jewelry, and I don't usually wear makeup anymore but go dark when I do. My arm tattoo sleeve and piercings kind of hint to my style overall. And that's what it's been since the 90s when I was a teenager. I work from home and don't really care if someone thinks I'm 44 dressing "too young." It's the way I dress and I'm comfortable in it.
I would love to see you on twitch live streaming and chatting! I enjoy your videos so much about internet analysis and it could be nice to just casual chatting about it with you, would be a cool way to see other people's perspectives about those topics
Oo I can't wait to watch this one while I eat breakfast tomorrow! I work as a merchandiser so I think about style and trends 24/7. My personal style is like... you know when you see a cartoon character wearing something bright and weird and cool, and you're like "I wish those blue jeans with neon green rips were real," yeah, those are the pieces I gravitate toward. Artsy, unexpected, deliberate.
Omgggg I love that you used Jenny’s video!!!! She had the best content!
This was a great insightful video! I am always of the mind to tend to be extra kind to people when they are searching for aesthetics or labeling them as some thing one thing or another. On one hand it makes things searchable. The “rockstar’s girlfriend” look, which I’ve had for years being the rockstar and not the girlfriend (such is like lmao) is so much easier to search right now rather than “edgy girl”. On the other hand, and I am so serious about this, it can hurt when people look down on you for labeling something you like. When I was in my teens, I was actively searching for what my aesthetic was. My mom would just rip me a new one each time saying that we shouldn’t be focused on fashion in life and I shouldn’t be trying to pose as this thing or that thing. But really I just seriously wanted to express myself and I didn’t know how to do it. I was given practical shoes that could be dirty or cleaned up. I was given jeans and T-shirts and I was given conservative clothes that I could wear to church and that was it. I didn’t feel like me and I didn’t even know who I was. I saw people on TV wearing cool outfits and I wanted to express myself too. Eventually, a lot of people would say that I just had this very very 80s rocker type vibe whether I just had bangs or I had cut my hair in a shag or if I just had my hair curly. at the time I had decided that those were very different hairstyles and that it must be a sign that I should just explore the 80’s vibe. Again I was met with my mom reaming me out for trying to be something I’m not. It occurred to me that if a person is something like dark academia they don’t just come out of the womb that way. At some point you have to find pieces that you like and start wearing them. So I fought my family that claimed that I was being a poser by trying this or that out, and I just started experimenting with things. My overall rocker vibe does stretch to the different things that I do, but I can tell you that the thing I wore to the concert on Monday is not exactly the thing that I wore to church on the weekend. However, some pieces do get recycled. I’m definitely able to dress within my own taste and style but also look like five different people all week long lol. There’s things that I love and uniforms that reach to when I need to, but there’s also creative outfits that I’ll try here and there and then recycle those pieces for something else. At this point now my wardrobe is more of a collection and I just have to watch out for what pleather is deteriorating and shedding everywhere, lol, and what pieces catch my eye at a store or a thrift shop or online so that I can just add to and replace something.
i have nooo idea what my personal style is, and i’ve been in a multi-year process to revamp my closet to pieces that feel comfy and convey my personality as much as possible. but i also made a pretty drastic change to my hair recently, and i’m trying to figure out how to style pieces that play up my figure and my active lifestyle (ie durable but somehow cute (?) shoes). I LOVE THIS VIDEO. this was so thought-provoking. also loved your self-reflection part.
the 75 hard challenge seems perfect actually wow. now i’m thinking of doing that for this summer so i can figure out my own uniform, my own current style. and more importantly, i can see what pieces i wear a lot and what i should donate… and what pieces i should save up for/buy.
What’s funny to me is I only ever see people wearing these “aesthetics” on line. I have never been at the supermarket or coffee shop and saw someone dressed like a cottage core girly or a ballerina girly, hell, I haven’t even seen anyone dressed “high fashion” in my everyday life, except for social events like concerts or music festivals. For context I live in Atlanta GA.