i've been natural for so many years you'd think I'd be at a better place with my hair.. i'm not lol but i'm learning how to love it in its natural shrunken state, no slicked edges or nothing.. the bar for black women to upkeep their natural hair when we've just been learning how to do it in the past decade is too damn high. If you see a black girl and her hair is not "laid".. leave that damn girl alone please. I am her, she is me.
I totally agree. Our hair shouldn't have to be laid. I want to normalize "undone" type 4 natural hair. I walk around in public with intentional or sometimes unintentional bedhead regularly. I just don't care anymore. My hair's gonna do what it does.
I wish black men did a better job at uplifting dark skin women with type 4 hair. Y'all are legitimately Gorgeous and I hope one day we as a collective of black men can love y'all the way we're supposed to. I'm glad yall found a safe haven where y'all can uplift each other. Much love to all of you.
Thank you, Ronald. As an older woman of African origin, I believe we black women have to love and respect ourselves first but our men really need to get their heads right. I understand for you all who live in a racist supremacist society that it may be hard but why would you not want children who look like you ? I have thick Afro hair (i refuse to use the letter and number, I am more than that) and have experienced white racism and really hope and pray that our black men wake up before its way too late.
black men watch their black mothers hate/hide their hair. of course they'll grow up hating it too. it starts with us black women loving our hair. thats just my opinion based off my experience. :)
You’ve got to let go of this desire for validation from black men, it will be to your detriment. Go where you are loved and celebrated, and more importantly learn to love yourself/your features. I have learned to love myself and now only dating men who don’t exhibit self hatred and genuinely desire me. I encourage other dark skin women to do the same, life is so much better on the other side 😊
I got rid of wigs lol. When other people with looser textures have a bad hair day they just rock it and keep it moving. I’m working on accepting myself in my natural state. I really like this video
That's amazing :) I'm glad I watched this video, I have way looser hair, 3b/3c, but it's still curly. It's so poofy and shrinks so much that I hate it sometimes, everyone else's is either straight, wavy or if curly then not poofy. It's annoying.
what helped me love my 4c hair is realizing that the only reason why it seemed "hard" to take care of was because i was trying to make it fit in with society's ideal hair type (straight). if 4c hair was the standard of beauty, straight-haired people would go through the same hell that black women go through to make their hair the standard. i also stopped trying to fit in with eurocentric standards of beauty in general, since i'm black. society might not like my hair, but that doesn't mean i have to hate it either. i'm not gon lie, sometimes it's hard. but i tell myself the same thing you told yourself: i'm not gonna let white supremacy make me look down on myself and my blackness. i love this video and how vulnerable you are. i'm glad i subscribed to you. :)
Reject even the categorization! It was a black man who didn't even respect his own culture who invented those characterizations. Reject them! Turn them upside down! If ADOS hair is properly categorized, the type that comes out of the /majority/ of our heads should be Type 1. Every hair stylist who claims to specialize in ADOS hair should realize your type is the most important type to learn, not the least. If someone tells you that you have "Type 4c" hair, correct them. Sister, your hair is Type 1 among ADOS people! We are beautiful because we are black, not in spite of it.
This video is so powerful. So many of us have/are currently going through this journey of loving our hair because we were raised to see it as something that is unmanageable, difficult and unprofessional. My biggest tip - wear it. Keep wearing it. Eventually you will start to see the beauty it in.
THIS! I have been natural for about 8 years and I am JUST appreciating my hair! It's taken THIS long! It's helped for me to learn my hair and what products work for ME. It's also helped me to find more people with hair like ME. Type 4 hair does not equal 4c (my type of hair).
As a black girl with 4c, i feel like the world has told us we arent good enough. I'm sorry to say, but so many black women wear wigs and fake hair or texlax their edges. That still shows that we as a community still don't love ourselves. I wish i could see more black girls with 4c styles and not these wigs and tons of fake hair taking out their edges. We have to step up. US. No one in the media is going up step up for us
That’s what I’m saying idc what they say , wearing different textures just shows how much we try to disassociate ourselves with our natural hairstyle, any other race of women wearing external always goes for their hair texture… why can’t we?
I was contemplating buying a wig until I realized why I wanted to buy it. I don’t truly love myself or my hair. But I’m going to wear my natural hair for a few weeks until I get it done for my bday
“Your hair can feel that you hate it” I needed to hear every single word in this video but that struck me immediately. What a perfect video to find on my wash day. Thank you so much for this.
You are not alone .. although I learned to love my 4c crown there are days I envy long straight beyond the shoulder styles …this too shall pass …stay encouraged
I have a friend (Turkish) who has long straight hair, that has to be washed every couple of days. Listening to the drama she goes through, made me appreciate my once a week wash day.
I had dreadlocks for 7 years and found the beauty in my hair only then. I didn't like the sleek look (I just felt too scalpy lol) with my locs and enjoyed how frizzy and thick it was. Fast forward to me combing them out and I have loved my hair even more. I think having locs for me gave me that realization that my hair is beautiful loose or locked in it's natural state.
I have locs now too and I'm debating on cutting them off or combing them out. 🤔 I hated my loose natural hair though so I'm not sure if I will be okay 😅
@@ondreatorrence4322 well, was that your reason for starting locs in the first place? I restarted my locs again after I played with my loose natural hair for a full year when I made my original post. Locs are my lifetime hairstyle but I enjoyed my loose natural after finding the right "products" that paired well with my texture. Plus, I'm a low maintenance gal so locs definitely help me in that regard.
It's so strange and yet comforting to find someone with the same inner monologue of what we go through on those difficult wash days and even more complicated styling days. This was beautiful. On my journey to love not only my hair but myself on a whole, I've been reminding myself that everything beautifully unique about myself has been pointed out in negative ways from people who are genuinely insecure and unhappy with themselves. Our haters always see the beauty in our differences before we do, you simply thank them and learn to see yourself from your own pov.
For me, I came to the realization that is not the texture, it's the length. I don't hate the texture of my hair but I wish it was longer, like long...I haven't organized all my thoughts yet, so much to unpack but, something about long hair and femininity goes together in today's society My hair is thin so I really didn't have a hard time washing. We learn to love our features, to love our skin and all comes down to loving our race, however I feel like the love for our hair is a conversation about our own views of femininity, not necessarily beauty standards, in the end, I'm sure it's all connected but I can't help but notice that I do find beautiful women who are black and have 4c hair but it's usually long.. I find many black women beautiful, like stunning with long or short hair, natural or relaxed, with protective styles or not.. Like I said a lot to unpack. I'm going do crochet braids now because my hair broke off
I feel like crying every time I see my hairline. Fed up with my 4c hair. Sometimes I feel black women with this hair type were given it as a punishment of some sort. Silly but I just can get my head round why we have this difficult woolly type unmanageable hair. Needing so much attention, taking up so much time and energy. Just plaiting my hair makes me ache:my arms, my neck, shoulders, back, you name it😡 I now know why, when I was younger; why my mum couldn’t be bothered with it. I disliked my hair then and still do now, 30 odd years on🥺
@@berthafligno2028 I feel the same honestly our hair can be a really difficult sometimes, expensive and time consuming as well and that’s just the reality of it some people may say well you spend more money wigs and weaves well I don’t wear wigs and weaves so I don’t spend more money on that but still it’s costly buying products with small amounts at high prices for our hair and it’s sold to us by everyone except black people so we don’t even profit off these products we spend so much money on smh
When you said what your former dean said to you I was like ‘yeeeeeeesssssss’ from the depths of my soul. I truly believe our hair feels and responds to the energy we give it. So much of the black woman experience has been about breaking us down and I think we have internalized so much of that hate and in turn projected it on the very parts of us that validate our blackness. So I speak to my hair, (I speak to my body too but that’s a whole other story) I use words that create love for myself to myself and I caress the parts of my body that were once points of self deprecation I.e my hair, tummy, thighs. You’re doing the Lord’s work sis. So rooting for you and sending you all the love and light🤎✨
I just came on here to tell you that although I am Korean and do not share the same type of hair as you, your video and the message contained in it resonated very deeply with me. SO much POC insecurities are rooted in white supremacy, and your raw words and beautiful video really helped me on a night when I felt very insecure and not very beautiful. Thank you.
@@r3tr0spctv43 i just see someone thanking the creator for a content that helped her out, no matter how little, concerning her insecurities. kelsia words, tho directed to herself as a black woman, can also resonate with a lot of other people who have different insecurities but see that everyone, no matter who they are or what race also do deal with their own insecurities. and seeing them try to break out of it is so inspiring. why are you so salty over it?
I'm black but I have a lot of Korean and half Korean friends. I know they go through some similar struggles with their hair and skin, even if they're not mixed, because some of them have wavy or super thick hair. And from a young age they are taught that only bone straight hair and milky skin are beautiful. It's very difficult to love yourself the way you are when society and even your family is telling you that you need to change. It's really great that these words resonated with you and can help you to feel more confident in yourself.
everytime a white person tells me "Oh!! I love your hair, it look so daamn good". Im like "thank you", but I cant believe it. Like how could he/she love my hair texture ?
I understand what you mean. I also feel like some white people are very passive sometimes for example a white woman complimented my hair but then proceeded to talk about how all black women hair is short.
Take the compliment and move on. It's not for them to love it . You were given that beautiful head of hair, whichever texture you have rock it with pride.
I know you guys are conditioned to hate it but it's genuinely so pretty and cute. The bounciness, the curls. Long or short. Its gorgeous. Black braiding styles are stunning, too. Really curly styles are amazing and pretty and I love watching videos of hair in the 3s and 4s because they just look good and it's a good learning experience, too. Even though I have wavy, thin hair lmao. It may not benefit my hairstyles or anything but I like to appreciate the styles and better understand what these women deal with and go through. For whatever it's worth, it really is a lovely hair type. I want to see a world that better appreciates it.
As a 4c girl, I really appreciate this video. My mom put relaxers in my hair ever since I was young. Due to this, my hair was super damaged and would never grow past a certain length. It was breaking off so much everyday, and I wasn't happy with how it looked at all. Recently, I got so tired of it that I began wearing wigs and hair extensions, which I'd never done before. Truthfully, I hated it so much. It was so hot and uncomfortable wearing fake hair, and I was constantly worried about people judging me if my hair was not perfect. I was always worried about the tracks showing, or the hair looking too stiff, or the wig not sitting right, etc. It gave me a lot of anxiety and I just couldn't do it. A few months ago, I finally had enough and just cut off my hair. Up until that point, I had never seen my natural hair. I felt soo ugly at first when I saw my 4c hair. I had always admired long and straight hair, and mine was the exact opposite. I felt so many negative feelings about my hair texture, and I didn't even want to leave my house for a while. The beginning was really tough. But as time went on, my hair started growing SO MUCH MORE than it ever had before, and it was much stronger too. My hair has grown so much in just a few months, which really shocked me, and it looks really cute too! I am really starting to appreciate my natural hair. I am so glad that I took a stand against these ideas that made me feel like my hair wasn't good enough. It's time to start empowering girls with kinkier hair textures because we are cute and pretty!!! :)
One thing I did and believe helped me love my hair was completely cutting out wigs, weaves and any form of hair extensions cuz that way I felt like my hair was all I had and it really helped me love and take better care of it. Your hair is beautiful.
I really don’t feel like that with my hair. I don’t even blow drymy hair , I let my hair breathe. I don’t like the vocabulary used to describe 4C. “it’s too hard , takes time, so painful , break combs” whatever. It’s because you are trying to make it something else of what it’s not! I don’t say it’s easy but If you like your hair , let them be , listen to them and talk nicely to them. We’ve been brainwashed to think that our hair is disgusting and not feminine , appropriate and I’m so happy that each day I wake up , I wear it proudly and don’t even think of what other might think of my hair. Side note : I have a lot of shrinkage and I wear it like an Afro or two buns, that’s it! And I love my hair
But that’s you not everyone is gonna feel the same about their hair or have the same experience with their hair people keep saying well your doing this doing that that’s why, well whose to say what you do is gonna work for someone else just cause it works for you cause that’s not how it works you can’t disregard what someone is experiencing with their hair cause what you do works for you everyone experience is gonna be different hence why we all have different feelings and opinions about our hair
@@lovelydiva06 that’s why the first sentence said “ MY hair”. My only problem here is that they talk bad about natural hair in general when it’s only THEIR natural hair that is hard to manage
Afro hair is so beautiful and it is sickening to know that as black children we are programed to believe it needs to be "tamed" in the eyes of our society's standard. Nothing we as afro people do about our hair will ever make us accepted and being okay with that is more important to teach. ✊🏽💞🙏🏽 #crownact
For me I have been getting bored because I finally reached my goal of mid waist hair last year. And it still shrinks to my shoulders. I spent so much time being “perfect” to get to this goal, that I didn’t really get to explore with it. Now, I’m finally using color and I was so upset with the fact that I wanted another color because I thought I was betraying my hairs journey. But in time, I’ve realized I don’t need to impress anyone about how much I love my authentic self. My authentic self wants color because I like to see physical change to represent who I am growing into. So my hair has been red a couple months now and I love it. I’m not afraid to put in extension braids or twists or a wig because I still know who I am under all this. I just try to be good to my hair, and not let it control who I am growing into as a woman. It has relieved so much pressure I didn’t know I had in me. And she still growing y’all! Also mirror affirmations work for me. Out loud or in your head.
Thank you for sharing! Up until a month ago I used to rotate hairstyles: from slicked back hair with ponytails that had a looser texture, to spring twists, faux locs and afro wigs. I rarely wore my natural hair free of extensions because I felt it wasn’t, “pretty”. And even though I would install styles and wigs that mimicked its texture, I only felt comfortable doing so because they were long or voluminous. I, unfortunately, had equated length and having loose curls with beauty As my 26th birthday approached I wanted to do something different. I wanted to wear my hair free of extensions - it felt important to do so. I remember asking God to give me the confidence to wear my hair in its natural state. A few days before my birthday I styled it in a wash-and-go. On the first day of wearing it outside I initially felt nervous, but shortly afterwards I felt so free. It was amazing. As I sat in the Uber with the window rolled down, I felt the wind through my hair and took a few selfies. I’ve been wearing wash-and-go’s for the past month and it has honestly been such an incredible feeling not having anything attached to my hair. It’s strange because 6 years ago I did the big chop to a little higher than scalp level, and it was the most confident I had ever felt, but overtime I let society dictate what is deemed beautiful I’m still learning to love my hair and I am so, so happy to be wearing it out free of extensions. It is honestly one of the best decisions I have ever made. In a year or so (maybe even sooner due to excitement) I’d like to have sisterlocks installed, or start traditional locs - it’s hard to decide because they’re both so beautiful 😂
I have a looser curl texture (3C) but before I knew how to take care of I hated how frizzy it was. I got bullied in school because of my appearance, and my hair was one of the main targets. I relaxed my hair for years until it was so heat damaged it started to break off, and in a last attempt to save my hair by starting to do wash & go's and hair masks, I saw how bad it got. I was started comparing my hair to old pictures of my "ugly" hair that people bullied me for and saw how beautiful my curls were. Now after I big chopped and learned to take care of my hair I love it. It's never too late to learn to embrace your curls. Own it. Love it. Take care of it. And it will do the same for you :)
I wish more people would talk about the reality of it taking hours upon hours to wash and style long, type 4 hair and how sometimes that aspect alone is reason enough to get a relaxer. I have 4b/c and I love my texture. I was natural for 5 years and learned how to take care of my hair and it was waist length. However it took me 7+ hours to do! I also have dandruff and need to wash my hair everyweek which is simply impossible for me to do with my hair in its natural state. I simply dont have the time to do that anymore so I got a relaxer. I'm in college and it drove me crazy how much TIME I was spending on my hair washing, detangling and twisting and it (even though i loved the way it looked). I just wish people talked about how not all black girls with type 4 hair that get a relaxer lack self love. Sometimes you simply dont have the time for it especially when your hair is long.
I agree. Self love didn't change the fact that my hair is very prone to tangles and shrinkage. Went back to relaxers and couldn't be happier. Also not everyone feels that spiritual/emotional connection to their hair. It's dead protein like fingernails so I wouldn't think of "speaking love" to it.
I'm type 4, mostly 4c with thick hair and it's always been longer (not waist length which I would LOVE but also be annoyed by lol It is a LOT). My hair has been natural my whole life because my relatives encouraged it, especially my parents. My junior year of high school I didn't have anyone to braid my hair (stepsisters always did it when they lived at home). So I would run the flat iron through it every other week so I wouldn't have to comb it. My dad and my mom kinda hated it, but I had AP classes and college applications and was exhausted. But I told my friends I was gonna be nice and kinked out come senior year because I would have time and I mostly wore an afro or puff that year 😭 When you don't have the energy to stand in the shower for an hour and then style it right after, it's really not self hate. It's learning time management. I bet your hair is beautiful both ways 💁🏾♀️ Being natural is just one of the many hair options we have as Black ladies.
I have severe dandruff and I would never get a relaxer because it was exacerbate it. It’s ok to get a relaxer but admit why you got it forreal and stand on it. Relaxers doesn’t help with dandruff at all. You don’t have time to do your natural hair but you have time to maintain relaxed hair which is chemically treated and harder to properly manage? It’s equivalent to natural color people getting their hair colored to manage it better but worse
@@_Kim_Possible @Kim Possible im not saying the relaxer cures dandruff, or makes my dandruff lessen. Im saying that it allows me to wash my hair more often since detangling and applying products to my hair is easier and faster! Being able to wash my hair more often allows me to go outside with a clean flake free scalp which is all i want. Also relaxed hair is NOT harder to manage! I follow the same wash day routine as i used to when i was natural. Wet hair, detangle, shampoo, deep condition. Because im relaxed although it the same steps as before the process goes much faster and is less of a headache because detangling is a breeze! After that to style i apply leave conditioner and heat protectant, blowdr, and put in to braids and im done!
I’m 14 and for 4 years my hair was always straight when I was younger but now I love it and leave it out beautiful as can be, it’s now down almost to the middle of my back but it shrinks to my neck. I can embrace it now that I’ve seen your video it has really inspired me, thank you so much get through it girl I can see the strength you hold❤️❤️❤️❤️
I have been fully natural for almost 6 yrs. I have type 4 hair (not 4c), and I think type 4abc is the most beautiful and diverse. It can be a lot of maintenance, depending on what look you are trying to achieve, but it's worth it 🖤
I struggled for years dealing withmy 4C hair. This self-hated of my hair is also from my family especially from my mother and her sister. I don't even to mention the pain. I'm only child with 4C hair. I guess my late Southern father was trying to remove the blackness by marrying my lighter skin, long, 3A hair mother. It didn't happen with me the oldest, but my sister and my late brother had curly/wavy hair. As time passes for me (I'm 54), I'm learning to love and embrace my 4C hair because it connects me to my ancestral motherland of Mama Africa, the thing in which white supremacy couldn't take away. 🙏❤
So eloquently said.. I am speechless (yet realize this is divine timing). I was literally sitting in front of the mirror looking at my post 7 month relaxed hair wondering if and when the time would come that I looked in the mirror and loved how I looked with my natural vs. with straight hair. I just 'feel' like my long pin straight hair best fits my longer face shape. The natural hair journey is just that.. A journey. Cutting my hair short would not be the best fit for my face shape. Nor do I want to spend money on fake hair, wear too tight braids that can cause breakage, nor wear plaits (in public) that make me feel like I'm 5 instead of 50 while waiting for my hair to dry into an acceptable curly style. There are so many other important things going on in the world yet looking in the mirror is the silent struggle. Self acceptance and ❤ is key.. We need more content like this to disrupt the programming. Peace. Love. Light. Healing
I have 3b hair. Very curly and frizzy. One day I went to the salon, the person who did my hair said she was in a rush and did my hair quickly. My hair was extremely damaged after coming back from the salon. My hair lost its softness and curl pattern and was always just frizzy. Even though I don’t have 4c hair (btw 4c hair is beautiful) I still could relate to this video a lot! I’m going to start loving my natural hair again! Thanks!!!
Never in my life have I related so much to a video about my 4c hair I almost cried during the video because I remember saying the exact same thing about my hair 'defying gravity' a few weeks ago. I feel so good to know that I am not the only one with these thoughts thank you for this wonderful video ❤
I love my hair (type 4 but mostly 4c coils) and it gets on my nerves almost every time I've had to do it or get it done. I've been natural my whole 26 years and I feel glad that my parents encouraged it so much. It really helped me notice whether the feedback I got from other Black girls was positive or internalized hatred. Most of the time it was positive and I think it's that they could tell I loved my hair and it was taken care of so well (lots of braided styles and a big puff every blue moon or an afro). I think when you take care of your hair, people care less about the texture and more about how healthy it is. It was really affirming to hear "look at all that pretty hair" as children (I have 4 sister and our textures are all different) when we'd have a million ponytails or just a fro. I try to do the same with my nieces when they were little. I can't swoop baby hair (my actual baby hair is super short and straight 😂🤦🏾♀️), and I am sometimes too lazy to lay anything. But I'm fine with that. I've tried styles that just won't work for my texture so I do all the styles that is meant for kinkier hair and not for looser curls. Everything isn't for everyone and that's okay too. Sometimes I'll take my hair out of braids or twists early just because I miss my hair, but I definitely get annoyed by the maintenance all the time. There's no rule that says we have to like it 24/7.
Thank you for sharing your journey. I am a fellow 4c natural and started my UA-cam channel from my desire to help spread more 4c content. This year makes 10 years on my hair journey, and despite a long period of length retention difficulty, I’ve absolutely loved my hair the whole time through. When it was a twa I must admit I sometimes doubted my beauty, but around the awkward length, I think I can say I had accepted every part of the journey. I am now just reaching hip length and still have the same passion for my hair. Hearing your experience helped remind me of my original passion to spread positivity and love of 4c hair, ESPECIALLY to fellow 4c girls. Because it took me years until I saw a girl on UA-cam with texture like mine, and then still longer before finding girls with waist length 4c hair. I want to be that girl on UA-cam for future 4c girls who are still struggling and searching for representation. I’m so happy you’re in a better place now, and I hope some of my videos can also help keep you inspired and hopeful in the days to come. *PS: we’re both black, naturals in Asia 🙌🏾 I live in Japan 🇯🇵 😆
I know how you feel. I cut my locs two years ago and have been trying to figure out. I have a cabinet full of draw string pony tails , wigs and clip in weaves and I've decided what was the point of attempting to embrace my natural by covering it up all the time. I realized my locs are where I was happiest and what feels more natural to me. So back to locs. Your honesty is so refreshing.
This is amazing and so encouraging Thank you for being a voice for the millions of black women who struggle with accepting themselves in their natural state xxx
This video was incredibly powerful. It was very raw, and honest, and I genuinely feel like I relate to this so much. Thank you for sharing your journey
I definitely appreciate you speaking your truth. It deeply resonates with me and what I’m going through right now. It truly is hard to go completely against the grain.
Your hair can hear you and knows that you hate it. This truly resonated with me. It goes beyond our hair sometimes to our skin, our nose, our face, our bodies. Thank you 🙏🏽 ♥️🙏🏽
I literally named my hair Loki after the God of mischief because it was so impossible. I hated how it never looked right so I mostly used wigs and braids. But then I fell into the 30 day hair detox with the Black girls Curls ladies and I bought the SeeSomeCurls hair class they have, and it's been a game changer. Wash day is now wash 2 hours and that includes drying time. My hair looks so well behaved! I need a hair cut as some parts are a little choppy from me cutting things out of anger or frustration or just heat damage. I strongly suggest you check it out if you want a simple routine what will leave you truly loving your hair! I'm pretty much obsessed with Loki now and can't stop looking and touching it. Like I have curls! I thought my hair was just undefined frizzy mess and that's all it would ever do but it was just me abusing her and treating her like a an unwanted stepchild smh.
I have 4c thin hair and I haven’t put heat in my head for over 2 years. My hair grows best when I leave it alone, but it also prevents me from dealing with my hair. I’m so quick to put on a wig or some braids whenever I don’t want to deal with my hair and after 4-5 years of being natural I’m still learning to love my 4c hair. My hair is down to my back now but like I said I don’t use heat so none of the styles I wear reflect that. I think the most frustrating thing is when people automatically assume “ your bald” or “ have no hair” because my shrinkage don’t reflect how long my hair actually is.
This is an accurate description of my relationship with my hair... One thing that made me love my hair more was just to stay further away from relaxers or texturisers and just keep it in protective styles longer cause wash days for me are quite long and I can't have wash days as often...
I am a mixed gi with 3c cus and i still watched this , felt it helped.me love my hair more ( because i didnt really like it and always wished it was like all my classmates , straight and long ) and fall in love with you and oyyr honestly i just hope you all finally love your hair type like u started loving mine and i love you all and i love 4c hair now i thinks its so pretty i love the afro style it looks so gold to me honestly like my hair can neither manage that afro style nor the slick gel soft style so its lime in between but i still love it i hope you all are having the best day ever and achieve all your goals and dreams ❤ ❤ ❤
This is beautiful. I wish I had the answer to how to engage and love our 4c hair in a healthy way but unfortunately, I dont. I personally feel like I cheated because I put my hair in locs to avoid having to deal or manage my hair. Often times, when i had to deal or manage my hair prelocs, I would end up frustrated, angry, and tired leading me to say some mean things about myself bc of my hair. Especially in comparison to my sisters hair even though we have the same parents her hair was looser than mines. In putting my hair in locs I learned to love my hair bc it grew longer and it was easier to deal with. but that's how I knew that I cheated bc I still havent learn to love it's very essence. The way I describe taking care of it as "managing" it or dealing with it as if it is something that needs to be controlled explains the plaguing blatant dislike I have for my hair when it was not in locs. I do think that with education and spending more time rechecking yourself when you have those negative thoughts are one of the first steps to loving your hair. But I havent really gotten there yet so take my thoughts with a grain of salt. Sorry for the long response. Your video just spoke to me.
Hoping to see more honest content like this from other creators. I think it'll generate more conversation on our hair, wig industry, hair care, and more.
Holy shit. Found this looking for tutorials for my 4c hair and BOY was this video a breath of fresh air. New sub here. You had me at the Dean’s words. As a black woman with 4c hair and an atypical body shape “for a black girl” I know what it’s like to internalize society’s disdain for a part of me that I can’t control. I’m still working through accepting my hair and body but know this: I’m working on it. Glad you’re here, Kelsia. Your voice is SO IMPORTANT. 💕
My hair is more like 4a/4b, but I just gave up relaxers 2 years ago. When I first big chopped after 14 months of transitioning, I wasn't totally in love with my hair. I had never had hair that short and I didn't like really short hair on me. But learning how to care for completely natural hair and how to style it was a fun journey for the most part. I found that I disliked my hair the most when I was struggling to do anything with it. I had horrible tangling and there was a point when I was just sick of it and the amount of time it took to detangle just for it to tangle back up. Then I started trying different things to fix the excessive tangling and I eventually found something that worked for me. I went to a natural hair salon and found a stylist to hype me up and give me a silk press. After having my hair straight for a couple of weeks, I started missing my coily hair. Since then my hair has been thriving and I've been having fun experimenting with different styles and temporary colors. I think that once you reach peak hair health, your hair becomes easier to manage and love. It's fun being able to go from a silk press one week to a full on fro the next to switching up the color without the damage. It's a lot of trial and error and problem solving, but our hair is beautiful and versatile and never boring.
@@scorieshair My hair had always tangled quite a bit ever since I started transitioning. It got slightly better after my big chop, but it still tangled a lot more than it should have. Then at one point it got really bad and I kept trying to troubleshoot. I tried using a chelating shampoo since I have hard water (even though I have a filter). It didn't change anything, but I kept the chelating shampoo because it's just nice to have when you have hard water. I trimmed my ends months before I went to the salon. It helped a little, but the tangling was still bad. I tried Olaplex. Didn't fix the issue. I also kept my hair stretched and started detangling in the shower or with a steamer with conditioner. This made detangling slightly easier, but it was still bad. Then I used the Curlsmith Bond Curl Rehab Salve. My hair loved it. The tangling issue was pretty much resolved. A couple of weeks after that I got a silk press and trim and while my hair was straight I cut out any single strand knots I found (there were a lot). I've continued to use the Curlsmith every other week since I figured out my hair is high porosity. Either that product is special or my hair just needed a real protein treatment. I had previously been using a fenugreek ayurvedic hair mask as a protein treatment. I still keep my hair stretched and detangle in the shower because it makes life easier, but the Curlsmith is what I really credit for solving my problem.
@@crackkillspuppies this is so interesting.. So you really did a lot to solve your problem and in the end you needed a good protein treatment. I wonder if this would also work for me because I am low porosity. I detangle before I shampoo, I shampoo in sections but it still ends of getting tangled and knotty again before I style it. I've been told I have a strong curl pattern. I will try your solution once I take out my protective style next month. Thanks for sharing, this is helpful.
This video brought tears to my eyes, I've struggled with my 4c hair for a very long time, even at this current moment because i have a scalp infection and it Literally eated away all my hardwork and i felt like hiding because i was so insecure and i would always wish for another hair type. But the moment i started loving it was the moment i started to accept, learn and care for it just as i would to a Plant to maintain its Growth and Health and my life become so much better and the infection started going away and my hair started to grow even more healthier than it was. Thank you for this video it honestly brought hope and joy to my heart
I Love and appreciate this so much, I'm 20 years old and along with starting to get insecure about my body and my skin tone (medium dark) ,I started to hate my 4c natural hair too. I texlaxed my hair too, and my hair is just damaged and I hate it, I miss my healthy kinks and I'm working on getting them back, and working on showing my whole self more love because I'm beautiful. Black women are beautiful, light ,medium , dark, we are all gorgeous!
I love this video so much and it hit home so much. I hated getting my hair relaxed but loved to see my natural growth underneath a few weeks later. As soon as I could, I stopped relaxing my hair after high school and I felt free. But I didn't know how to take care of my hair and eventually learned how along the way. When I started using social media I flowed what others did but it did resonate with me. Now, I know that I don't have to do something I don't like and I can take care of my hair the way I like. Unlearning and learning is challenging but worth it because now I can share with my niece and nephew what I learned during my journey. Thank you for sharing your experience with us :)
I have kinky hair that is almost bra strap length. The key to natural hair is being confident in styles that don't take forever to do. My hair is pretty thick and course so I wear it in twists most of the time. I think people say being natural is time consuming because they spend too much time doing styles that make it look less natural. Those often require more detangling and avoiding frizz - which adds to the maintenance. There are a lot of low maintenance styles for course hair (pin ups, twists, etc). But do you feel pretty when you wear them? I think that's the problem for a lot of women. Once I embraced the low maintenance styles, frizz and the kinks, being natural became easier. I no longer spend tons of money on products and I allow my hair/twists to frizz a bit. They sometimes look like locs and I am ok with that. It's so much freer when you actually accept the frizz.
I resonated with this 100%! I've been natural for almost 3 years now, and it just felt like the further I got in my natural hair journey the MORE I missed my relaxed hair. I just wanted to give up, but I knew my hair as a natural was SUPRISINGLY not as strong as my relaxed hair I had in the pass, if anything it became more fragile. I legit thought that going natural was embracing my GOD-GIVEN natural beauty, but I quickly realized it was time consuming and a JOURNEY. Honestly, this has touched my heart deeply and re-motivated me to not give up on my natural hair, thank you!
i truly loved this video and am very glad that you spoke to what has been on the hearts of many 4c girls for a long long time. your story is your own as much as it is the story of so many 4c black girls who simply want to love their hair as it is. and i think it's even more important seeing this video after hearing what TI's daughter had to say about her hair not "fitting her". i wish you luck and success on your hair journey. going natural wasn't really an option for me because i knew that the relaxer/perm/weave route was not for me. i didn't want to risk irreversible damage for easy hair. so i put in the work and cried over the failed twist-outs and prayed that God would end my suffering and let me wake up with 3c hair someday. through active learning, trial and error, and more, i was able to reprogram my mentality around doing my hair. now, every time i wash, style, or protect my hair, i see it as an act of love. i see every wash day, every 2-day mini-vacation to put in box braids, and every LOC moisture routine like a declaration of how much i love and appreciate my hair and guess what? my hair has never been more manageable, predictable, defined, etc. i literally went from never having a noticeable curl pattern, always having a lot of breakage and dryness, and always feeling defeated to smiling and rejoicing in how long and healthy my hair is. i wish i could travel back 8 years and tell myself "start treating your hair like you love it" every day, because i cannot attribute these improvements to any product or regimen. love, care, and gratitude made my hair healthy. plain and simple.
I loved seeing this aesthetic of videography and storytelling discussing reflections of a personal journey from a black woman 🥺. Keep up with the quality work, it will surely be worth it 💖💖. Love, another black woman.
Your hair is BEAUTIFUL 🥺😍. Loving your natural hair is loving a form of your true self . Honestly embracing this is accepting your true self and the authentic you . I wish we can normalize these. You embracing this and speaking about this is inspiring to many woman not just with 4C but 4a 4b 3c whatever it’s just another way of segregating us .
Wow!! A lot of truth here. More 4c ladies need to see it because I see so many people sharing the same sentiments on social media ALL THE TIME and it makes me sad as a fellow 4c.
Beautiful! Thank you for sharing. I've been natural for a long time but I didn't start wearing wash and go's up until about 2 months ago. I always "liked" my natural hair texture, but I felt embarrassed to wear it in its natural state outdoors. I was so nervous but I finally did it and it was so freeing😌😌I love it. The FIRST day I did it, I got complimented too.
Dealing with natural can be a real trip because some people see it as high maintenance or too much work, but I’ve found I don’t need to do a lot to keep it healthy and growing. I’m glad you were able to see things differently and find things that work for you. This video probably took a lot of work, I was touched by your story 💕
It is a process and self love on many levels is often not taught for many black women for generations. We learn through our own experiences and often need many reminders. Great series.
Loved this video. I actually contemplated texturizing my hair just a couple weeks ago and was watching videos to see people’s experience. I love my hair, but I wanted it to be easier to deal with is all, but I guess if looser hair was for me I would’ve been born with it. This video solidified my decision to not go that route. Thanks! *subscribes*
I did a lot of research to educate myself about my hair. I think we need to start having content like this series. It's not just me that has been watching girls texlax their hair. Thanks for this.
Your transparency is so refreshing and most importantly, relatable. There's not enough space for me to even begin to explain my thought process and attitude towards my hair over the years - since it's been in it's natural state. To say it's been challenging is an understatement lol - I need a new word for challenging. The unfortunate part is that most of us have been conditioned in this manner, but like all muscles in the body, the brain can also be exercised, reconditioned and transformed into a complete new outlook. No it won't be easy, at all, but it's tangible through constant work - positive affirmations, patience, and surrounding yourself with those who will uplift and not tear down.
This is amazing. I was just talking to God about this but with something else and it brought me back to the question of why do I feel this way. Thank you so much. ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you for this video ♥. My daughter is struggling with loving her hair and I showed her this video and it definitely made her smile and have a different outlook.
I'm really trying to get my boyfriend to love his own hair. I see him get frustrated and annoyed it wont do the things he wants it to, just as you said you experienced as well. Its a journey for sure.
Just came across your video and really enjoyed listening to your story. For me my natural hair journey has not been a long one but I’ve learned to follow girls with type 4 hair, similar to mine. I try to stay away from the type 3 hair bloggers as I am not able to relate to them. One of the first UA-camrs that I followed shared some really good advice that have stayed with me…and that is learn to love your own hair as it is different from everyone else and don’t try to make it look like someone else’s. It’s a journey and I am still on it and learning to love my natural hair. Everyday is a new experience and I am still experimenting and trying new and different things. Sometimes it turns out great and other times not so much. Thanks for sharing your story and know that you’re not alone ❤️
Appreciate your vulnerability 💕 I have had the same type of journey with my hair . The texturising, second big chop and all . I feel you . So thank you . ❤️
as a Christian homeschooler , I grew up knowing only white people. sometimes I would cry because I wanted to have hair like them. I'm still insecure about it right now. I have eczema on my hands so they get really irritated when I try to do my hair with any product. so I always think " if I had hair like the girls at church , my hands would be better and so would my life" . its so hard for me to be confident in my hair.
Honestly, the weird thing is I don’t care much for straight hair. I’ve always liked curls though, but just not mine if that made sense. Don’t get me wrong, I know that 4 type hair is technically the “curliest” type of hair but I’ve always thought 3 type hair was pretty, and for some reason never liked or cared much for 4 type hair. I’m trying to unlearn this, and to not dislike my hair texture but it’s hard. Sometimes I wish my hair wasn’t so “kinky”, or anything like that. :/
I'm just learning (last week) how to use gel with my hair to bring out the curls. Watch the No Oils or Butters gel challenge videos! You'll learn to love it more.
I felt that so deeply tho I have 3a 2c hair type , it's so touching how deep hair can be for some people . Your hair is absolutely gorgeous and I'm so proud of how honest you are with yourself
Gorgeous girl with your gorgeous skin and gorgeous kinky coily hair. I see you. Your beauty cannot be denied. This was video is the light that so many black girls and women need to see through the darkness of repression, oppression, and self-hate. Thank you💗💗💗
I was so glad to see this video. It reminded me to be grateful 🙏🏽 for what I have instead of complaining. My mother often told me ' There's someone worse off than you.'
I feel like most women who go natural should might as well get locs…they’re very versatile and can be very professional and clean depending on how you maintain them! With the amount of work it takes to be natural you should just get locs, and wake up everyday with hair that won’t stress you out
i've been natural for so many years you'd think I'd be at a better place with my hair.. i'm not lol but i'm learning how to love it in its natural shrunken state, no slicked edges or nothing.. the bar for black women to upkeep their natural hair when we've just been learning how to do it in the past decade is too damn high. If you see a black girl and her hair is not "laid".. leave that damn girl alone please. I am her, she is me.
I totally agree. Our hair shouldn't have to be laid. I want to normalize "undone" type 4 natural hair. I walk around in public with intentional or sometimes unintentional bedhead regularly. I just don't care anymore. My hair's gonna do what it does.
omg amen
@@wavyafro8741 omg ❤❤❤ me too, it's a global resistance!
👏🏾
I'm so proud of you. Your hair and you !re beautiful blessings to you on this journey 🙏🏿
The words of the dean, " your hair can FEEL that you hate it..." so deep, so true and so wise.
She's so wise man...
What is Dean ?
That one hit me
@@yiheejackson5603 A dean is the head of a college/university. Similar to a principal at a high school.
Facts
I wish black men did a better job at uplifting dark skin women with type 4 hair. Y'all are legitimately Gorgeous and I hope one day we as a collective of black men can love y'all the way we're supposed to. I'm glad yall found a safe haven where y'all can uplift each other. Much love to all of you.
@ronald keep hoping........
Thank you, Ronald. As an older woman of African origin, I believe we black women have to love and respect ourselves first but our men really need to get their heads right. I understand for you all who live in a racist supremacist society that it may be hard but why would you not want children who look like you ? I have thick Afro hair (i refuse to use the letter and number, I am more than that) and have experienced white racism and really hope and pray that our black men wake up before its way too late.
black men watch their black mothers hate/hide their hair. of course they'll grow up hating it too. it starts with us black women loving our hair. thats just my opinion based off my experience. :)
No one gono celebrate or destroy you but you ,therefore it all begins with you.
You’ve got to let go of this desire for validation from black men, it will be to your detriment. Go where you are loved and celebrated, and more importantly learn to love yourself/your features. I have learned to love myself and now only dating men who don’t exhibit self hatred and genuinely desire me. I encourage other dark skin women to do the same, life is so much better on the other side 😊
I got rid of wigs lol. When other people with looser textures have a bad hair day they just rock it and keep it moving. I’m working on accepting myself in my natural state. I really like this video
Keep doing it the other girls will follow through.
Exactly
That's amazing :) I'm glad I watched this video, I have way looser hair, 3b/3c, but it's still curly. It's so poofy and shrinks so much that I hate it sometimes, everyone else's is either straight, wavy or if curly then not poofy. It's annoying.
what helped me love my 4c hair is realizing that the only reason why it seemed "hard" to take care of was because i was trying to make it fit in with society's ideal hair type (straight). if 4c hair was the standard of beauty, straight-haired people would go through the same hell that black women go through to make their hair the standard. i also stopped trying to fit in with eurocentric standards of beauty in general, since i'm black. society might not like my hair, but that doesn't mean i have to hate it either. i'm not gon lie, sometimes it's hard. but i tell myself the same thing you told yourself: i'm not gonna let white supremacy make me look down on myself and my blackness. i love this video and how vulnerable you are. i'm glad i subscribed to you. :)
Yes to everything you said! The only reason our hair seems "hard" to deal with is because we're trying to make it be something it's not.
amen sister
Thank you!!!!!!! I have 4 C hair - it’s not a big deal to take care of off you stop trying to make it what it’s not. Our hair is beautiful!
When i look at it EVERYTHING takes WORK it's called maintainance you have to keep it up period.
Reject even the categorization! It was a black man who didn't even respect his own culture who invented those characterizations. Reject them! Turn them upside down! If ADOS hair is properly categorized, the type that comes out of the /majority/ of our heads should be Type 1. Every hair stylist who claims to specialize in ADOS hair should realize your type is the most important type to learn, not the least. If someone tells you that you have "Type 4c" hair, correct them. Sister, your hair is Type 1 among ADOS people! We are beautiful because we are black, not in spite of it.
This video is so powerful. So many of us have/are currently going through this journey of loving our hair because we were raised to see it as something that is unmanageable, difficult and unprofessional. My biggest tip - wear it. Keep wearing it. Eventually you will start to see the beauty it in.
Hi Jenn!! Big fan of your channel
Jenny... just came from watching your video where you recommended this one😁😁
As U Should 💕💚
THIS! I have been natural for about 8 years and I am JUST appreciating my hair! It's taken THIS long! It's helped for me to learn my hair and what products work for ME. It's also helped me to find more people with hair like ME. Type 4 hair does not equal 4c (my type of hair).
We love you Jenn J! ❤️
As a black girl with 4c, i feel like the world has told us we arent good enough. I'm sorry to say, but so many black women wear wigs and fake hair or texlax their edges. That still shows that we as a community still don't love ourselves. I wish i could see more black girls with 4c styles and not these wigs and tons of fake hair taking out their edges. We have to step up. US. No one in the media is going up step up for us
Say it again for the people in the back.
This 👆🏾👏🏽
A lot are hypocrites and don’t wanna do the job..
That’s what I’m saying idc what they say , wearing different textures just shows how much we try to disassociate ourselves with our natural hairstyle, any other race of women wearing external always goes for their hair texture… why can’t we?
I was contemplating buying a wig until I realized why I wanted to buy it. I don’t truly love myself or my hair. But I’m going to wear my natural hair for a few weeks until I get it done for my bday
“Your hair can feel that you hate it” I needed to hear every single word in this video but that struck me immediately. What a perfect video to find on my wash day. Thank you so much for this.
Seeing this made me break out in tears! The moment I was ready to comment - she said it the video… wow .
You are not alone .. although I learned to love my 4c crown there are days I envy long straight beyond the shoulder styles …this too shall pass …stay encouraged
I have a friend (Turkish) who has long straight hair, that has to be washed every couple of days. Listening to the drama she goes through, made me appreciate my once a week wash day.
I had dreadlocks for 7 years and found the beauty in my hair only then. I didn't like the sleek look (I just felt too scalpy lol) with my locs and enjoyed how frizzy and thick it was. Fast forward to me combing them out and I have loved my hair even more. I think having locs for me gave me that realization that my hair is beautiful loose or locked in it's natural state.
That's exactly how I started loving my hair too!
Me too!
i’ve just cut my locs and i wish it affected the way i see my hair now that i’ve cut it.
I have locs now too and I'm debating on cutting them off or combing them out. 🤔
I hated my loose natural hair though so I'm not sure if I will be okay 😅
@@ondreatorrence4322 well, was that your reason for starting locs in the first place? I restarted my locs again after I played with my loose natural hair for a full year when I made my original post. Locs are my lifetime hairstyle but I enjoyed my loose natural after finding the right "products" that paired well with my texture. Plus, I'm a low maintenance gal so locs definitely help me in that regard.
It's so strange and yet comforting to find someone with the same inner monologue of what we go through on those difficult wash days and even more complicated styling days.
This was beautiful.
On my journey to love not only my hair but myself on a whole, I've been reminding myself that everything beautifully unique about myself has been pointed out in negative ways from people who are genuinely insecure and unhappy with themselves. Our haters always see the beauty in our differences before we do, you simply thank them and learn to see yourself from your own pov.
love this comment!
That’s the message! You are so spot on 👌🏾
The script, emotion, openess. Truly an admirable and refreshing way that you have composed this love!
Agreed!!! Simply perfection!
For me, I came to the realization that is not the texture, it's the length. I don't hate the texture of my hair but I wish it was longer, like long...I haven't organized all my thoughts yet, so much to unpack but, something about long hair and femininity goes together in today's society
My hair is thin so I really didn't have a hard time washing.
We learn to love our features, to love our skin and all comes down to loving our race, however I feel like the love for our hair is a conversation about our own views of femininity, not necessarily beauty standards, in the end, I'm sure it's all connected but I can't help but notice that I do find beautiful women who are black and have 4c hair but it's usually long.. I find many black women beautiful, like stunning with long or short hair, natural or relaxed, with protective styles or not.. Like I said a lot to unpack. I'm going do crochet braids now because my hair broke off
I can feel that part, the length
This is how I feel rn ..the other day I wash my hair and it was time to twist and moisturizer I was so tired that I almost started crying
hang in there sis lmao..
I feel like crying every time I see my hairline. Fed up with my 4c hair.
Sometimes I feel black women with this hair type were given it as a punishment of some sort.
Silly but I just can get my head round why we have this difficult woolly type unmanageable hair.
Needing so much attention, taking up so much time and energy. Just plaiting my hair makes me ache:my arms, my neck, shoulders, back, you name it😡
I now know why, when I was younger; why my mum couldn’t be bothered with it. I disliked my hair then and still do now, 30 odd years on🥺
@@berthafligno2028I know the feeling 😭😭 don't talk down on your hair ....it's your crown and your beauty..it's part of u
@@berthafligno2028 I feel the same honestly our hair can be a really difficult sometimes, expensive and time consuming as well and that’s just the reality of it some people may say well you spend more money wigs and weaves well I don’t wear wigs and weaves so I don’t spend more money on that but still it’s costly buying products with small amounts at high prices for our hair and it’s sold to us by everyone except black people so we don’t even profit off these products we spend so much money on smh
Lmaooooo me af 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Getting locs is what finally made me not be so frustrated with my hair
same
When you said what your former dean said to you I was like ‘yeeeeeeesssssss’ from the depths of my soul. I truly believe our hair feels and responds to the energy we give it. So much of the black woman experience has been about breaking us down and I think we have internalized so much of that hate and in turn projected it on the very parts of us that validate our blackness. So I speak to my hair, (I speak to my body too but that’s a whole other story) I use words that create love for myself to myself and I caress the parts of my body that were once points of self deprecation I.e my hair, tummy, thighs. You’re doing the Lord’s work sis. So rooting for you and sending you all the love and light🤎✨
I just came on here to tell you that although I am Korean and do not share the same type of hair as you, your video and the message contained in it resonated very deeply with me. SO much POC insecurities are rooted in white supremacy, and your raw words and beautiful video really helped me on a night when I felt very insecure and not very beautiful. Thank you.
This is really not about you
@@r3tr0spctv43 i just see someone thanking the creator for a content that helped her out, no matter how little, concerning her insecurities. kelsia words, tho directed to herself as a black woman, can also resonate with a lot of other people who have different insecurities but see that everyone, no matter who they are or what race also do deal with their own insecurities. and seeing them try to break out of it is so inspiring.
why are you so salty over it?
@@r3tr0spctv43 Who hurt u
@@r3tr0spctv43 literally
I'm black but I have a lot of Korean and half Korean friends. I know they go through some similar struggles with their hair and skin, even if they're not mixed, because some of them have wavy or super thick hair. And from a young age they are taught that only bone straight hair and milky skin are beautiful. It's very difficult to love yourself the way you are when society and even your family is telling you that you need to change.
It's really great that these words resonated with you and can help you to feel more confident in yourself.
everytime a white person tells me "Oh!! I love your hair, it look so daamn good". Im like "thank you", but I cant believe it. Like how could he/she love my hair texture ?
Why wouldn’t they? It’s beautiful.
I understand what you mean. I also feel like some white people are very passive sometimes for example a white woman complimented my hair but then proceeded to talk about how all black women hair is short.
Take the compliment and move on. It's not for them to love it . You were given that beautiful head of hair, whichever texture you have rock it with pride.
I know you guys are conditioned to hate it but it's genuinely so pretty and cute. The bounciness, the curls. Long or short. Its gorgeous. Black braiding styles are stunning, too. Really curly styles are amazing and pretty and I love watching videos of hair in the 3s and 4s because they just look good and it's a good learning experience, too. Even though I have wavy, thin hair lmao. It may not benefit my hairstyles or anything but I like to appreciate the styles and better understand what these women deal with and go through.
For whatever it's worth, it really is a lovely hair type. I want to see a world that better appreciates it.
Because it looks good
As a 4c girl, I really appreciate this video. My mom put relaxers in my hair ever since I was young. Due to this, my hair was super damaged and would never grow past a certain length. It was breaking off so much everyday, and I wasn't happy with how it looked at all. Recently, I got so tired of it that I began wearing wigs and hair extensions, which I'd never done before. Truthfully, I hated it so much. It was so hot and uncomfortable wearing fake hair, and I was constantly worried about people judging me if my hair was not perfect. I was always worried about the tracks showing, or the hair looking too stiff, or the wig not sitting right, etc. It gave me a lot of anxiety and I just couldn't do it. A few months ago, I finally had enough and just cut off my hair. Up until that point, I had never seen my natural hair. I felt soo ugly at first when I saw my 4c hair. I had always admired long and straight hair, and mine was the exact opposite. I felt so many negative feelings about my hair texture, and I didn't even want to leave my house for a while. The beginning was really tough. But as time went on, my hair started growing SO MUCH MORE than it ever had before, and it was much stronger too. My hair has grown so much in just a few months, which really shocked me, and it looks really cute too! I am really starting to appreciate my natural hair. I am so glad that I took a stand against these ideas that made me feel like my hair wasn't good enough. It's time to start empowering girls with kinkier hair textures because we are cute and pretty!!! :)
One thing I did and believe helped me love my hair was completely cutting out wigs, weaves and any form of hair extensions cuz that way I felt like my hair was all I had and it really helped me love and take better care of it. Your hair is beautiful.
I really don’t feel like that with my hair. I don’t even blow drymy hair , I let my hair breathe. I don’t like the vocabulary used to describe 4C. “it’s too hard , takes time, so painful , break combs” whatever. It’s because you are trying to make it something else of what it’s not!
I don’t say it’s easy but If you like your hair , let them be , listen to them and talk nicely to them.
We’ve been brainwashed to think that our hair is disgusting and not feminine , appropriate and I’m so happy that each day I wake up , I wear it proudly and don’t even think of what other might think of my hair.
Side note : I have a lot of shrinkage and I wear it like an Afro or two buns, that’s it! And I love my hair
But that’s you not everyone is gonna feel the same about their hair or have the same experience with their hair people keep saying well your doing this doing that that’s why, well whose to say what you do is gonna work for someone else just cause it works for you cause that’s not how it works you can’t disregard what someone is experiencing with their hair cause what you do works for you everyone experience is gonna be different hence why we all have different feelings and opinions about our hair
@@lovelydiva06 that’s why the first sentence said “ MY hair”. My only problem here is that they talk bad about natural hair in general when it’s only THEIR natural hair that is hard to manage
Afro hair is so beautiful and it is sickening to know that as black children we are programed to believe it needs to be "tamed" in the eyes of our society's standard. Nothing we as afro people do about our hair will ever make us accepted and being okay with that is more important to teach. ✊🏽💞🙏🏽 #crownact
For me I have been getting bored because I finally reached my goal of mid waist hair last year. And it still shrinks to my shoulders. I spent so much time being “perfect” to get to this goal, that I didn’t really get to explore with it. Now, I’m finally using color and I was so upset with the fact that I wanted another color because I thought I was betraying my hairs journey. But in time, I’ve realized I don’t need to impress anyone about how much I love my authentic self. My authentic self wants color because I like to see physical change to represent who I am growing into. So my hair has been red a couple months now and I love it. I’m not afraid to put in extension braids or twists or a wig because I still know who I am under all this. I just try to be good to my hair, and not let it control who I am growing into as a woman. It has relieved so much pressure I didn’t know I had in me. And she still growing y’all! Also mirror affirmations work for me. Out loud or in your head.
You are amazing, thank you for sharing ❤️
this is so beautiful and RELATABLE!!! it’s hard when i constantly compare my hair to everyone else’s… love hate relationship
Thank you for sharing! Up until a month ago I used to rotate hairstyles: from slicked back hair with ponytails that had a looser texture, to spring twists, faux locs and afro wigs. I rarely wore my natural hair free of extensions because I felt it wasn’t, “pretty”. And even though I would install styles and wigs that mimicked its texture, I only felt comfortable doing so because they were long or voluminous. I, unfortunately, had equated length and having loose curls with beauty
As my 26th birthday approached I wanted to do something different. I wanted to wear my hair free of extensions - it felt important to do so. I remember asking God to give me the confidence to wear my hair in its natural state. A few days before my birthday I styled it in a wash-and-go. On the first day of wearing it outside I initially felt nervous, but shortly afterwards I felt so free. It was amazing. As I sat in the Uber with the window rolled down, I felt the wind through my hair and took a few selfies. I’ve been wearing wash-and-go’s for the past month and it has honestly been such an incredible feeling not having anything attached to my hair. It’s strange because 6 years ago I did the big chop to a little higher than scalp level, and it was the most confident I had ever felt, but overtime I let society dictate what is deemed beautiful
I’m still learning to love my hair and I am so, so happy to be wearing it out free of extensions. It is honestly one of the best decisions I have ever made. In a year or so (maybe even sooner due to excitement) I’d like to have sisterlocks installed, or start traditional locs - it’s hard to decide because they’re both so beautiful 😂
Thank you for sharing this! I recently went on my bday vacay with no wig a lawd it was a lot for me!
Is that you in your profile picture? Your hair is beautiful💗
@@esther9210 It is, and thank you! 🌻
This comment gave me so much hope ! Today is day 2 of wearing my hair as is and Chile I needed every bit of encouragement I just read here.
I have a looser curl texture (3C) but before I knew how to take care of I hated how frizzy it was. I got bullied in school because of my appearance, and my hair was one of the main targets. I relaxed my hair for years until it was so heat damaged it started to break off, and in a last attempt to save my hair by starting to do wash & go's and hair masks, I saw how bad it got. I was started comparing my hair to old pictures of my "ugly" hair that people bullied me for and saw how beautiful my curls were. Now after I big chopped and learned to take care of my hair I love it. It's never too late to learn to embrace your curls. Own it. Love it. Take care of it. And it will do the same for you :)
I’m glad you got to see the beauty of your curls :)
I wish more people would talk about the reality of it taking hours upon hours to wash and style long, type 4 hair and how sometimes that aspect alone is reason enough to get a relaxer. I have 4b/c and I love my texture. I was natural for 5 years and learned how to take care of my hair and it was waist length. However it took me 7+ hours to do! I also have dandruff and need to wash my hair everyweek which is simply impossible for me to do with my hair in its natural state. I simply dont have the time to do that anymore so I got a relaxer. I'm in college and it drove me crazy how much TIME I was spending on my hair washing, detangling and twisting and it (even though i loved the way it looked). I just wish people talked about how not all black girls with type 4 hair that get a relaxer lack self love. Sometimes you simply dont have the time for it especially when your hair is long.
I agree. Self love didn't change the fact that my hair is very prone to tangles and shrinkage. Went back to relaxers and couldn't be happier. Also not everyone feels that spiritual/emotional connection to their hair. It's dead protein like fingernails so I wouldn't think of "speaking love" to it.
I'm type 4, mostly 4c with thick hair and it's always been longer (not waist length which I would LOVE but also be annoyed by lol It is a LOT). My hair has been natural my whole life because my relatives encouraged it, especially my parents. My junior year of high school I didn't have anyone to braid my hair (stepsisters always did it when they lived at home). So I would run the flat iron through it every other week so I wouldn't have to comb it. My dad and my mom kinda hated it, but I had AP classes and college applications and was exhausted. But I told my friends I was gonna be nice and kinked out come senior year because I would have time and I mostly wore an afro or puff that year 😭 When you don't have the energy to stand in the shower for an hour and then style it right after, it's really not self hate. It's learning time management. I bet your hair is beautiful both ways 💁🏾♀️ Being natural is just one of the many hair options we have as Black ladies.
I have severe dandruff and I would never get a relaxer because it was exacerbate it. It’s ok to get a relaxer but admit why you got it forreal and stand on it. Relaxers doesn’t help with dandruff at all. You don’t have time to do your natural hair but you have time to maintain relaxed hair which is chemically treated and harder to properly manage? It’s equivalent to natural color people getting their hair colored to manage it better but worse
@@_Kim_Possible straight forward and truthful, i love that :3
@@_Kim_Possible @Kim Possible im not saying the relaxer cures dandruff, or makes my dandruff lessen. Im saying that it allows me to wash my hair more often since detangling and applying products to my hair is easier and faster! Being able to wash my hair more often allows me to go outside with a clean flake free scalp which is all i want. Also relaxed hair is NOT harder to manage! I follow the same wash day routine as i used to when i was natural. Wet hair, detangle, shampoo, deep condition. Because im relaxed although it the same steps as before the process goes much faster and is less of a headache because detangling is a breeze! After that to style i apply leave conditioner and heat protectant, blowdr, and put in to braids and im done!
I’m 14 and for 4 years my hair was always straight when I was younger but now I love it and leave it out beautiful as can be, it’s now down almost to the middle of my back but it shrinks to my neck. I can embrace it now that I’ve seen your video it has really inspired me, thank you so much get through it girl I can see the strength you hold❤️❤️❤️❤️
I have been fully natural for almost 6 yrs. I have type 4 hair (not 4c), and I think type 4abc is the most beautiful and diverse. It can be a lot of maintenance, depending on what look you are trying to achieve, but it's worth it 🖤
Things that are luxurious and beautiful are alot of maintenance !
I struggled for years dealing withmy 4C hair. This self-hated of my hair is also from my family especially from my mother and her sister. I don't even to mention the pain. I'm only child with 4C hair. I guess my late Southern father was trying to remove the blackness by marrying my lighter skin, long, 3A hair mother. It didn't happen with me the oldest, but my sister and my late brother had curly/wavy hair. As time passes for me (I'm 54), I'm learning to love and embrace my 4C hair because it connects me to my ancestral motherland of Mama Africa, the thing in which white supremacy couldn't take away. 🙏❤
So eloquently said.. I am speechless (yet realize this is divine timing). I was literally sitting in front of the mirror looking at my post 7 month relaxed hair wondering if and when the time would come that I looked in the mirror and loved how I looked with my natural vs. with straight hair. I just 'feel' like my long pin straight hair best fits my longer face shape. The natural hair journey is just that.. A journey. Cutting my hair short would not be the best fit for my face shape. Nor do I want to spend money on fake hair, wear too tight braids that can cause breakage, nor wear plaits (in public) that make me feel like I'm 5 instead of 50 while waiting for my hair to dry into an acceptable curly style. There are so many other important things going on in the world yet looking in the mirror is the silent struggle. Self acceptance and ❤ is key.. We need more content like this to disrupt the programming. Peace. Love. Light. Healing
I have 3b hair. Very curly and frizzy. One day I went to the salon, the person who did my hair said she was in a rush and did my hair quickly. My hair was extremely damaged after coming back from the salon. My hair lost its softness and curl pattern and was always just frizzy. Even though I don’t have 4c hair (btw 4c hair is beautiful) I still could relate to this video a lot! I’m going to start loving my natural hair again! Thanks!!!
Wow. That’s a really awesome exercise - leaving you me hair in its shrunken state for a week to remind yourself what you hair “really” wants to do. 🙌🏾
I honestly think 4C hair is the most beautiful of all hair. It's literally a crown, so so amazing ❤️❤️
Never in my life have I related so much to a video about my 4c hair I almost cried during the video because I remember saying the exact same thing about my hair 'defying gravity' a few weeks ago. I feel so good to know that I am not the only one with these thoughts thank you for this wonderful video ❤
I love my hair (type 4 but mostly 4c coils) and it gets on my nerves almost every time I've had to do it or get it done. I've been natural my whole 26 years and I feel glad that my parents encouraged it so much. It really helped me notice whether the feedback I got from other Black girls was positive or internalized hatred. Most of the time it was positive and I think it's that they could tell I loved my hair and it was taken care of so well (lots of braided styles and a big puff every blue moon or an afro). I think when you take care of your hair, people care less about the texture and more about how healthy it is. It was really affirming to hear "look at all that pretty hair" as children (I have 4 sister and our textures are all different) when we'd have a million ponytails or just a fro. I try to do the same with my nieces when they were little. I can't swoop baby hair (my actual baby hair is super short and straight 😂🤦🏾♀️), and I am sometimes too lazy to lay anything. But I'm fine with that. I've tried styles that just won't work for my texture so I do all the styles that is meant for kinkier hair and not for looser curls. Everything isn't for everyone and that's okay too. Sometimes I'll take my hair out of braids or twists early just because I miss my hair, but I definitely get annoyed by the maintenance all the time. There's no rule that says we have to like it 24/7.
Thank you for this video...
I really like the wisdom your dean shared with you.
This touched me in a deep place. Thank you for your honesty.
Thank you for sharing your journey. I am a fellow 4c natural and started my UA-cam channel from my desire to help spread more 4c content. This year makes 10 years on my hair journey, and despite a long period of length retention difficulty, I’ve absolutely loved my hair the whole time through. When it was a twa I must admit I sometimes doubted my beauty, but around the awkward length, I think I can say I had accepted every part of the journey. I am now just reaching hip length and still have the same passion for my hair. Hearing your experience helped remind me of my original passion to spread positivity and love of 4c hair, ESPECIALLY to fellow 4c girls. Because it took me years until I saw a girl on UA-cam with texture like mine, and then still longer before finding girls with waist length 4c hair. I want to be that girl on UA-cam for future 4c girls who are still struggling and searching for representation. I’m so happy you’re in a better place now, and I hope some of my videos can also help keep you inspired and hopeful in the days to come.
*PS: we’re both black, naturals in Asia 🙌🏾 I live in Japan 🇯🇵 😆
As an African American girl I do relate to all that was mentioned in this video! Thanks for posting, and please keep the videos coming🙂
This sooo powerful. And i appreciate it sooo much . Thank u . U are soo strong for imbracing the real feels you have
absolutely love how honest and moving this video is. i can definitely relate, thank you
I know how you feel. I cut my locs two years ago and have been trying to figure out. I have a cabinet full of draw string pony tails , wigs and clip in weaves and I've decided what was the point of attempting to embrace my natural by covering it up all the time.
I realized my locs are where I was happiest and what feels more natural to me. So back to locs.
Your honesty is so refreshing.
This is amazing and so encouraging Thank you for being a voice for the millions of black women who struggle with accepting themselves in their natural state xxx
This video was incredibly powerful. It was very raw, and honest, and I genuinely feel like I relate to this so much. Thank you for sharing your journey
I definitely appreciate you speaking your truth. It deeply resonates with me and what I’m going through right now. It truly is hard to go completely against the grain.
Your hair can hear you and knows that you hate it. This truly resonated with me. It goes beyond our hair sometimes to our skin, our nose, our face, our bodies. Thank you
🙏🏽 ♥️🙏🏽
I literally named my hair Loki after the God of mischief because it was so impossible. I hated how it never looked right so I mostly used wigs and braids. But then I fell into the 30 day hair detox with the Black girls Curls ladies and I bought the SeeSomeCurls hair class they have, and it's been a game changer. Wash day is now wash 2 hours and that includes drying time. My hair looks so well behaved! I need a hair cut as some parts are a little choppy from me cutting things out of anger or frustration or just heat damage. I strongly suggest you check it out if you want a simple routine what will leave you truly loving your hair! I'm pretty much obsessed with Loki now and can't stop looking and touching it. Like I have curls! I thought my hair was just undefined frizzy mess and that's all it would ever do but it was just me abusing her and treating her like a an unwanted stepchild smh.
Same here with 30 day detox. 6 mo in with no oils or creams. Just shampoo conditioner gel or foam. A breeze.
Me too! My way day last time was an hour 55 minutes :D They taught me a lot
How much was it?
@@XxMercuriiXx 45 for one month but if you get the 3 month packet its 35 a month.
Yasss queen, you are gorgeous and I love your hair if thats you in profile pic
This is such a beautiful piece, I love as naturals we need to appreciate 4c hair it's beautiful just like all the other curly hair types.
I have 4c thin hair and I haven’t put heat in my head for over 2 years. My hair grows best when I leave it alone, but it also prevents me from dealing with my hair. I’m so quick to put on a wig or some braids whenever I don’t want to deal with my hair and after 4-5 years of being natural I’m still learning to love my 4c hair. My hair is down to my back now but like I said I don’t use heat so none of the styles I wear reflect that. I think the most frustrating thing is when people automatically assume “ your bald” or “ have no hair” because my shrinkage don’t reflect how long my hair actually is.
This is an accurate description of my relationship with my hair... One thing that made me love my hair more was just to stay further away from relaxers or texturisers and just keep it in protective styles longer cause wash days for me are quite long and I can't have wash days as often...
I am a mixed gi with 3c cus and i still watched this , felt it helped.me love my hair more ( because i didnt really like it and always wished it was like all my classmates , straight and long ) and fall in love with you and oyyr honestly i just hope you all finally love your hair type like u started loving mine and i love you all and i love 4c hair now i thinks its so pretty i love the afro style it looks so gold to me honestly like my hair can neither manage that afro style nor the slick gel soft style so its lime in between but i still love it i hope you all are having the best day ever and achieve all your goals and dreams ❤ ❤ ❤
This is beautiful. I wish I had the answer to how to engage and love our 4c hair in a healthy way but unfortunately, I dont. I personally feel like I cheated because I put my hair in locs to avoid having to deal or manage my hair. Often times, when i had to deal or manage my hair prelocs, I would end up frustrated, angry, and tired leading me to say some mean things about myself bc of my hair. Especially in comparison to my sisters hair even though we have the same parents her hair was looser than mines. In putting my hair in locs I learned to love my hair bc it grew longer and it was easier to deal with. but that's how I knew that I cheated bc I still havent learn to love it's very essence. The way I describe taking care of it as "managing" it or dealing with it as if it is something that needs to be controlled explains the plaguing blatant dislike I have for my hair when it was not in locs. I do think that with education and spending more time rechecking yourself when you have those negative thoughts are one of the first steps to loving your hair. But I havent really gotten there yet so take my thoughts with a grain of salt. Sorry for the long response. Your video just spoke to me.
love the honest response. thank you for sharing this
thank you so much for this
Hoping to see more honest content like this from other creators. I think it'll generate more conversation on our hair, wig industry, hair care, and more.
Holy shit. Found this looking for tutorials for my 4c hair and BOY was this video a breath of fresh air. New sub here. You had me at the Dean’s words. As a black woman with 4c hair and an atypical body shape “for a black girl” I know what it’s like to internalize society’s disdain for a part of me that I can’t control. I’m still working through accepting my hair and body but know this: I’m working on it. Glad you’re here, Kelsia. Your voice is SO IMPORTANT. 💕
My hair is more like 4a/4b, but I just gave up relaxers 2 years ago. When I first big chopped after 14 months of transitioning, I wasn't totally in love with my hair. I had never had hair that short and I didn't like really short hair on me. But learning how to care for completely natural hair and how to style it was a fun journey for the most part. I found that I disliked my hair the most when I was struggling to do anything with it. I had horrible tangling and there was a point when I was just sick of it and the amount of time it took to detangle just for it to tangle back up. Then I started trying different things to fix the excessive tangling and I eventually found something that worked for me. I went to a natural hair salon and found a stylist to hype me up and give me a silk press. After having my hair straight for a couple of weeks, I started missing my coily hair. Since then my hair has been thriving and I've been having fun experimenting with different styles and temporary colors. I think that once you reach peak hair health, your hair becomes easier to manage and love. It's fun being able to go from a silk press one week to a full on fro the next to switching up the color without the damage. It's a lot of trial and error and problem solving, but our hair is beautiful and versatile and never boring.
Can you share what were the steps you took t fix the excessive tangling?
@@scorieshair My hair had always tangled quite a bit ever since I started transitioning. It got slightly better after my big chop, but it still tangled a lot more than it should have. Then at one point it got really bad and I kept trying to troubleshoot. I tried using a chelating shampoo since I have hard water (even though I have a filter). It didn't change anything, but I kept the chelating shampoo because it's just nice to have when you have hard water. I trimmed my ends months before I went to the salon. It helped a little, but the tangling was still bad. I tried Olaplex. Didn't fix the issue. I also kept my hair stretched and started detangling in the shower or with a steamer with conditioner. This made detangling slightly easier, but it was still bad. Then I used the Curlsmith Bond Curl Rehab Salve. My hair loved it. The tangling issue was pretty much resolved. A couple of weeks after that I got a silk press and trim and while my hair was straight I cut out any single strand knots I found (there were a lot). I've continued to use the Curlsmith every other week since I figured out my hair is high porosity. Either that product is special or my hair just needed a real protein treatment. I had previously been using a fenugreek ayurvedic hair mask as a protein treatment. I still keep my hair stretched and detangle in the shower because it makes life easier, but the Curlsmith is what I really credit for solving my problem.
@@crackkillspuppies this is so interesting.. So you really did a lot to solve your problem and in the end you needed a good protein treatment. I wonder if this would also work for me because I am low porosity. I detangle before I shampoo, I shampoo in sections but it still ends of getting tangled and knotty again before I style it. I've been told I have a strong curl pattern. I will try your solution once I take out my protective style next month. Thanks for sharing, this is helpful.
@@scorieshair You're welcome. I would love to hear if that ends up resolving the issue or if you find another solution.
This video brought tears to my eyes, I've struggled with my 4c hair for a very long time, even at this current moment because i have a scalp infection and it Literally eated away all my hardwork and i felt like hiding because i was so insecure and i would always wish for another hair type. But the moment i started loving it was the moment i started to accept, learn and care for it just as i would to a Plant to maintain its Growth and Health and my life become so much better and the infection started going away and my hair started to grow even more healthier than it was.
Thank you for this video it honestly brought hope and joy to my heart
This is beautiful. Thank you!
I Love and appreciate this so much, I'm 20 years old and along with starting to get insecure about my body and my skin tone (medium dark) ,I started to hate my 4c natural hair too. I texlaxed my hair too, and my hair is just damaged and I hate it, I miss my healthy kinks and I'm working on getting them back, and working on showing my whole self more love because I'm beautiful. Black women are beautiful, light ,medium , dark, we are all gorgeous!
I truly think your hair and type 4 hair in general is severely underrated and BEAUTIFUL!!! I love it. Best of luck to you on your journey.
I love this video so much and it hit home so much. I hated getting my hair relaxed but loved to see my natural growth underneath a few weeks later. As soon as I could, I stopped relaxing my hair after high school and I felt free. But I didn't know how to take care of my hair and eventually learned how along the way. When I started using social media I flowed what others did but it did resonate with me. Now, I know that I don't have to do something I don't like and I can take care of my hair the way I like. Unlearning and learning is challenging but worth it because now I can share with my niece and nephew what I learned during my journey. Thank you for sharing your experience with us :)
Keep doing this, Kelsia! I’ve been loving all your content.
Thanks Sha!😭
I have kinky hair that is almost bra strap length.
The key to natural hair is being confident in styles that don't take forever to do. My hair is pretty thick and course so I wear it in twists most of the time.
I think people say being natural is time consuming because they spend too much time doing styles that make it look less natural. Those often require more detangling and avoiding frizz - which adds to the maintenance.
There are a lot of low maintenance styles for course hair (pin ups, twists, etc). But do you feel pretty when you wear them? I think that's the problem for a lot of women. Once I embraced the low maintenance styles, frizz and the kinks, being natural became easier.
I no longer spend tons of money on products and I allow my hair/twists to frizz a bit. They sometimes look like locs and I am ok with that. It's so much freer when you actually accept the frizz.
I resonated with this 100%! I've been natural for almost 3 years now, and it just felt like the further I got in my natural hair journey the MORE I missed my relaxed hair. I just wanted to give up, but I knew my hair as a natural was SUPRISINGLY not as strong as my relaxed hair I had in the pass, if anything it became more fragile. I legit thought that going natural was embracing my GOD-GIVEN natural beauty, but I quickly realized it was time consuming and a JOURNEY. Honestly, this has touched my heart deeply and re-motivated me to not give up on my natural hair, thank you!
i truly loved this video and am very glad that you spoke to what has been on the hearts of many 4c girls for a long long time. your story is your own as much as it is the story of so many 4c black girls who simply want to love their hair as it is. and i think it's even more important seeing this video after hearing what TI's daughter had to say about her hair not "fitting her". i wish you luck and success on your hair journey.
going natural wasn't really an option for me because i knew that the relaxer/perm/weave route was not for me. i didn't want to risk irreversible damage for easy hair. so i put in the work and cried over the failed twist-outs and prayed that God would end my suffering and let me wake up with 3c hair someday.
through active learning, trial and error, and more, i was able to reprogram my mentality around doing my hair. now, every time i wash, style, or protect my hair, i see it as an act of love. i see every wash day, every 2-day mini-vacation to put in box braids, and every LOC moisture routine like a declaration of how much i love and appreciate my hair and guess what? my hair has never been more manageable, predictable, defined, etc. i literally went from never having a noticeable curl pattern, always having a lot of breakage and dryness, and always feeling defeated to smiling and rejoicing in how long and healthy my hair is. i wish i could travel back 8 years and tell myself "start treating your hair like you love it" every day, because i cannot attribute these improvements to any product or regimen. love, care, and gratitude made my hair healthy. plain and simple.
Great story, it absolutely resonates.
I loved seeing this aesthetic of videography and storytelling discussing reflections of a personal journey from a black woman 🥺. Keep up with the quality work, it will surely be worth it 💖💖.
Love, another black woman.
I love this ❤️this was beautiful. Thank you for being vulnerable , in a world full of judgement and opinions. I appreciate you and your journey.
Your hair is BEAUTIFUL 🥺😍. Loving your natural hair is loving a form of your true self . Honestly embracing this is accepting your true self and the authentic you . I wish we can normalize these. You embracing this and speaking about this is inspiring to many woman not just with 4C but 4a 4b 3c whatever it’s just another way of segregating us .
Wow!! A lot of truth here. More 4c ladies need to see it because I see so many people sharing the same sentiments on social media ALL THE TIME and it makes me sad as a fellow 4c.
Green Beauty, Craving Curly Kinks, Naturally High and many others are goals and have great advice on how to manage 4c :)
Beautiful! Thank you for sharing. I've been natural for a long time but I didn't start wearing wash and go's up until about 2 months ago. I always "liked" my natural hair texture, but I felt embarrassed to wear it in its natural state outdoors. I was so nervous but I finally did it and it was so freeing😌😌I love it. The FIRST day I did it, I got complimented too.
Dealing with natural can be a real trip because some people see it as high maintenance or too much work, but I’ve found I don’t need to do a lot to keep it healthy and growing. I’m glad you were able to see things differently and find things that work for you. This video probably took a lot of work, I was touched by your story 💕
It is a process and self love on many levels is often not taught for many black women for generations. We learn through our own experiences and often need many reminders. Great series.
I can so relate to this! Thanks for being so open and honest 💛
Always!
Loved this video. I actually contemplated texturizing my hair just a couple weeks ago and was watching videos to see people’s experience. I love my hair, but I wanted it to be easier to deal with is all, but I guess if looser hair was for me I would’ve been born with it. This video solidified my decision to not go that route. Thanks! *subscribes*
I did a lot of research to educate myself about my hair. I think we need to start having content like this series. It's not just me that has been watching girls texlax their hair. Thanks for this.
Your transparency is so refreshing and most importantly, relatable. There's not enough space for me to even begin to explain my thought process and attitude towards my hair over the years - since it's been in it's natural state. To say it's been challenging is an understatement lol - I need a new word for challenging. The unfortunate part is that most of us have been conditioned in this manner, but like all muscles in the body, the brain can also be exercised, reconditioned and transformed into a complete new outlook. No it won't be easy, at all, but it's tangible through constant work - positive affirmations, patience, and surrounding yourself with those who will uplift and not tear down.
This is amazing. I’m still learning how not to hate my 4c hair. I’m still ashamed to wear it in its natural shrunken state outside of the house
This is amazing. I was just talking to God about this but with something else and it brought me back to the question of why do I feel this way. Thank you so much. ❤️❤️❤️
Thanks for sharing!
Thank you for this video ♥. My daughter is struggling with loving her hair and I showed her this video and it definitely made her smile and have a different outlook.
I love this so much !!! " Your hair is a living part of you"
I'm really trying to get my boyfriend to love his own hair. I see him get frustrated and annoyed it wont do the things he wants it to, just as you said you experienced as well. Its a journey for sure.
Your videos are so transparent and refreshing 👌🏾
Thank you Mazvita! I'm glad you enjoy watching them
Just came across your video and really enjoyed listening to your story. For me my natural hair journey has not been a long one but I’ve learned to follow girls with type 4 hair, similar to mine. I try to stay away from the type 3 hair bloggers as I am not able to relate to them. One of the first UA-camrs that I followed shared some really good advice that have stayed with me…and that is learn to love your own hair as it is different from everyone else and don’t try to make it look like someone else’s. It’s a journey and I am still on it and learning to love my natural hair. Everyday is a new experience and I am still experimenting and trying new and different things. Sometimes it turns out great and other times not so much. Thanks for sharing your story and know that you’re not alone ❤️
Appreciate your vulnerability 💕 I have had the same type of journey with my hair . The texturising, second big chop and all . I feel you . So thank you . ❤️
I love this. It honestly came just in time.
as a Christian homeschooler , I grew up knowing only white people. sometimes I would cry because I wanted to have hair like them. I'm still insecure about it right now. I have eczema on my hands so they get really irritated when I try to do my hair with any product. so I always think " if I had hair like the girls at church , my hands would be better and so would my life" . its so hard for me to be confident in my hair.
I LOVE EVERYTHING about THIS content. 4c HAIR ROCKS!!
I never felt that way; but an excellent piece. Keep the content coming because this is new and refreshing!
Honestly, the weird thing is I don’t care much for straight hair. I’ve always liked curls though, but just not mine if that made sense. Don’t get me wrong, I know that 4 type hair is technically the “curliest” type of hair but I’ve always thought 3 type hair was pretty, and for some reason never liked or cared much for 4 type hair. I’m trying to unlearn this, and to not dislike my hair texture but it’s hard. Sometimes I wish my hair wasn’t so “kinky”, or anything like that. :/
I'm just learning (last week) how to use gel with my hair to bring out the curls. Watch the No Oils or Butters gel challenge videos! You'll learn to love it more.
hahah I made a whole video on it too!
I felt that so deeply tho I have 3a 2c hair type , it's so touching how deep hair can be for some people . Your hair is absolutely gorgeous and I'm so proud of how honest you are with yourself
Love love love. You're such a sweetheart and this video is so important, thank you for posting 🙏🏾
Glad it was helpful!
Gorgeous girl with your gorgeous skin and gorgeous kinky coily hair. I see you. Your beauty cannot be denied. This was video is the light that so many black girls and women need to see through the darkness of repression, oppression, and self-hate. Thank you💗💗💗
I love this video. It’s so beautiful and I can relate to this video so much so thank you!!🤍
You are so welcome! I'm glad you liked it
Kelsia…This is a beautiful digital diary entry! Thank you for sharing this piece with us. ❤
I was so glad to see this video. It reminded me to be grateful 🙏🏽 for what I have instead of complaining. My mother often told me ' There's someone worse off than you.'
I feel like most women who go natural should might as well get locs…they’re very versatile and can be very professional and clean depending on how you maintain them! With the amount of work it takes to be natural you should just get locs, and wake up everyday with hair that won’t stress you out