"Daddy, can you help me with the pumpkin?" "Yes, this is the body of Denise, I murdered her 25 years ago, she was your real mother." So, that child is...at least 25?
"I'm getting close, Dan" "How many babies are in us right now" "Stickier than I remember" "It's so wet" "Phil's going in raw" "I dare you." "To lick it?" "It slapped your chin" "It's time to get deep" "This was not the satisfying finger sensation I wanted" "Nose first" "Hard p"
They seem so much looser around each other on camera and just more relaxed in general lately. Seems like the tour did them a lot of good--they got to see that not all of their subscribers are teenage girls (which would be fine!) but the whole experience just seems to have helped their confidence and camera personalities exponentially!
Thought i was the only one! This and their lil mukbang were such a joy to watch i didnt want them to end. They jsut seem so happy and honestly this is the soft nice content i need right now lmao
”I’m getting close Dan” ”Let’s do it together” “This is the last time we’re touching knives” “It’s a lot stickier than I remember” “I’m going in” “It’s really satisfying after you start” “Ohhhhhh... Derekkkk...” “Calm down there bub” ... ...
@@imliterallyjesse "Berry" by definition according to Encyclopaedia Britannica: "Berry, in botany, a simple fleshy fruit that usually has many seeds, such as the banana, grape, and tomato. As a simple fruit, a berry is derived from a single ovary of an individual flower. The middle and inner layers of the fruit wall often are not distinct from each other."
dan: someone’s just gonna take this video.. without the video.. and just the sounds are gonna be disgusting _it only took you like ten baking videos to realise this._
Fun quotes form this videos “ testicles” “ flags this you have a responsibility” “It’s time to get deep” “It’s a lot stickier than I remember” “ pumpkin spice is cinnamon and lies” “It’s so wet” “ Phil’s going in raw” “This is an ASS pumpkin” “AHAHAHAHAHAH” *snort* “ yack” “This is some vore roll play” “This pumpkin is my self esteem...empty” “I’m doing hippo dan” “I can’t believe you invented drag” “I was a sexy emo” And last but not least “ oOf” And “WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING” This has been twat central and thank you for listening to my ted talk
Phil is either high on drugs and I want some of the same stuff or he's so ridiculously happy that he just can't stop giggling and I...want some of the same stuff.
Phil: Why doesn't it smell like pumpkin spice? Dan: Because pumpkin spice is made out of cinnamon and LIES Phil Me after buying pumpkin spice Pop Tarts
"He is beauty, he is grace"
"He has the better version of my face"
*died*
👋👋👋👋🙏🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
“Stabbing things is fun!”
“For legal reasons, that’s a joke”
ραllιƨ is stressed 😂😂 ayyyy
For serious indian mafia please don't -
i'll leave
@Tomboy Crazy another cultured person
Im sorry bout the memes
@@kriaallison congratulationsss
"I was a sexy emo"
mate, you still are
Honestly tho
Phil: "What's a sexy emo?"
Me: Y O U. A N D. D A N! 😊
Pretty Odd is a Bop fuckkk it’s true
Pretty Odd is a Bop okay kill me with the profile pic why don’t ya
Pretty Odd is a Bop i couldn't have said it better myself
Dan :"I'm not getting too emotionally attached to mine"
Also Dan :"I'm really bonding with it already "
"we will never be those instagram people, phil. and chances are if ur watching this u aint either"
wow thanks for calling me out like that dan
honestly though i felt attacked
I mean it hurts but it's true. My Instagram is a disgrace. 👍
mel I read that as dan said it but like same
I KNOW RIGHT
Raise your hand if you feel personally victimized by Dan Howell
The scariest thing about this video was the sheer volume of quotable phrases...
„One thick p“ ~ Phil Lester, 2018
"I'm close dan"... "you're close too" ~ Phil 2018
I agree
Can't have a dan and phil video without some questionable things said
Jungwoo Snoopy that is the truest thing i've ever heard
(edit: lol just noticed that you stan nct slsjdkdk you are truly an intellectual my friend)
"I wonder how many babies we have in us now"
-Phil Lester 2018
Lol
NOT CALLING PHILLY THIS BUT DAMN THAT SOUNDED SLUTTY😂
@@ghxstely wow
Phil: what do you have
Dan: *A KNIFE*
Phil: *n o*
"That's because pumpkin spice is just _cinnamon and lies_ Phil."
Ffs Dan I can't with you 😂
Omg I'm trying to find this again and I can't find it what's the timestamp
"He's beauty
He's grace
*_He has a better version of my face"_*
Can we get that shit on my gravestone
*Thanks*
Olivia Rose same
I ruined the 666 no crafting here
To be fair if someone said that you probably would 😂😂
phil's face after looked slightly offended
honestly me too bro
" That's because pumpkin spice is just cinnamon and lies, Phil."
-Dan, Halloween 2018
cinnamon and lies will be the name of my band if I ever start one
that quote is now gonna be on my ig bio 😂
He's right tho
If Phil doesn’t make Halloween baking this year I swear tg I will... respect his decision and understand that he’s a human being, but I’ll be sad
yeah ❤️
Same :>
Heheh
Well I'm not sure about baking, but he did answer one of the most important questions of the age. "Does pumpkin spice go with everything?"
I hope he does a baking video this year
"This pumpkin is my self esteem. Empty." - this is so relatable!
jass ann yassss queen
*Dan and Phil being sexually inappropriate for 20 minutes straight*
*how did I fukin know someone was going to point out straight*
Shut up 🤐
That time when you haven't even watched the video but you still like this comment because it's true about every one of their vids
forget the post baking universe, it's all about the post pumpkin carving universe now with all these innuendos
@@annabel7896 its the phandom mate
Can someone make a “Dan and Phil make inappropriate joke for 10mins straight” thank you for ur service
Taylor Hayes *just plays this video*
Taylor Hayes i mean you’re already watching a 20 minute one
"Phils going in raw people"
Taylor Hayes there’s actually nothing straight about it 😂
@@rubyink7314 Thank you for this comment
Whose back for Halloween 2019? Mourning spooky week
I love your profile pic! The best team! Although we didn't do too good this season... 😐
Kiana wait spooky week isn’t happening anymore?!😱 why? That was my favorite part of dan and Phil.😭
f
F
F
“Gimme ur iPhone *or ill scoop ya* “ - Daniel James Howell 2k18
Needs to be on a tshirt
My future yearbook quote
*jAmEs h0wArD* ok I’ll go lmao
Dan: testicles
Phil: *looking around nervously* what about them?
;3
5:47
he needs that monetization
Shook
‘D-dan? The camera is on...’
"That's because pumpkin spice is just cinnamon and lies"
i thought he said lice😭😭😭😭😭
"We are not those Instagram people"
"The chances are if your watching this your not either"
😤😔 the truth hurts
"Daddy, can you help me with the pumpkin?"
"Yes, this is the body of Denise, I murdered her 25 years ago, she was your real mother."
So, that child is...at least 25?
i was thinking about it too
DG A, thank you, that makes me feel less like an obnoxious nitpicker.
Hahaha
i’m so glad someone else picked up on this
It literally screamed because my name is Denise 😂👏
You... you could take so many quotes out of this video that are just....... I don't even know where to start
Imagine all the Twitter and Tumblr posts with quotes at the bootom of a gif or a screenshot only from this video
Pat Black “I’m going stick my fingers in my eyebrows” yep
PHIL:im close
Phil:your close too
Dan:testicles
“I’m getting close, Dan” 👀
@Amber Brooke Thank you (:
“omg it’s so wet”
“phil’s going in raw people”
Who else is watching in October 2020 please tell me im not the only one?
It's an annual tradition
I'm seeing them on my recommended and I keep getting heart attacks thinking that they've posted again ..but nope😣
*waves* Hello, fellow 2020 people-
Yeppp😭😭😭
I am!
They’ve given up on baking. Oh no Gordon Ramsey really did get to them...
What are you
An idiot sandwich🍔
You fucking doughnut 🍩 of course you don’t microwave a fucking salad 🥗 😂😂😂
@@lupe937 my favorite insult of his.
Gordon Ramsey? What does he have to do with this?
"I'm getting close, Dan"
"How many babies are in us right now"
"Stickier than I remember"
"It's so wet"
"Phil's going in raw"
"I dare you." "To lick it?"
"It slapped your chin"
"It's time to get deep"
"This was not the satisfying finger sensation I wanted"
"Nose first"
"Hard p"
Just close your eyes and believe
"Stabbing things is fun!"
"it's time to get deep" &
"This was not the satisfying fingersensation i wanted"
I would like this but it has 420 likes and....
Kyra Brown that's a fanfic all in itself
"I'm getting close, Dan"
I'm sorry everyone is dying at the innuendos and I'm crying in laughter over Dan dropping thr camera in the pumpkin
*hi...how ya doin..?*
I couldn’t get over
“yOU MAd LaD”
I pretty much just died laughing at 13:57 I don't know why
SAME SJDNSJSJSK
unrelated, i was the thousandth like and I feel legendary
“Calm down there bub” - dan. WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS
ccassyyy X RIGHT I HAD IT BEFORE BUT PLEASE GIVE ME THE TIME XOXO
medisnotonfire THERE YOU GO XOX 18:45
ccassyyy X legit why has no one noticed this
I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS COMMENT
There so freaking cute idc if they’re just friends or not THATS SO ADORABLE
I missed watching dan and phil together. Their content just makes me so happy
Samee
Johnny The Homicidal Maniac ikr 😫
They aren't dead ajahwibekcnw
your fellow weeb hehe they went on hiatus thoooooo
same:(
Dan and Phil making inappropriate noises for 20 mins
+innuendos
Do you mean: all of their videos?
oh my god the amount of innuendos in this video, how is this still monetized?
They're probably on Google preferred so they're more likely to get ads
they’ve been waiting all year for this too
RIGHT XD
I'm shook 😂 😂 😂
They don't need monetization anymore.
I like how every time Phil makes an inappropriate “joke” it’s a huge deal with a sound effect, but when Dan is inappropriate it’s
@Emily Hume you really scared the shit out of me with this joke dude
@Emily Hume
Timmy
@@aura8808 oh shi-
I can’t believe dan has been in his costume for 11 years
This is the blessed comment of the season
That was like crappy sand paper, smooth
this comment needs more attention
sᴀᴍᴇ
He was p r e p a r e d
He is beauty
He is grace
He has a better version of my face ...
Best quote in my opinion.
I thought he was going to say:
He is beauty
He is grace
He is Dan's face
Dans little ‘ hi how you doin’ LITERALLY HAS ME SCREECHING HOW COULD THIS GROWN ASS MAN BE SO ACUTE
'Acute', I see what you did there
I know
Hi howl you doing
I replayed it so many timessss
r I GH T?!
I like how he murdered Denise 25 years ago yet she has a child who sounds about 5
Lmao! Didn't notice that. 😆
The man absorbed Denise’s eggs and had a child asexually
@@saddog6456 science 🤠
@@saddog6456 what the fuck?
I noticed that and immediately had to search the comments.
Alternate Title: Dan and Phil Make Innuendos while Carving Pumpkins for 20 Minutes Straight
Alternate Title: Dan and Phil Somehow Make Pumpkin Carving 18+
20 minutes "Straight"
EriiaTheNeko this is funnier now
This is literally just DanAndPhilCRAFTS but with more innuendos in high quality
Quipplecake
And less Satan
dont cry, carve
S T A B B I N G T H I N G S A R E F U N
Pretty Odd is a Bop YOU ARE RIGHT, PRETTY ODD IS A FREAKING 🅱️OP
a m y I couldn’t get into it tbhhh
Pretty Odd is a Bop hey moon, please forget to fall down
SHARP AND MESSY
*No one:*
*Pumpkin-pregnant Dan: ma baybee*
"This pumpkin is my self esteem... EMPTY"
Same
Mood
Retweet
YEET
My science teacher said if it has seeds in it it is a fruit lol that's funny
“calm down there bub” is the cutest thing said in this video
Juice 🍉 I thought I was the only one who noticed!
Audrey Doyle Me too!
when was ittt
i cried
Audrey Doyle thank youu
I was not expecting Dan and Phil to bring up testicles while carving pumpkins
You should have been, though
K. M. Scythe that’s true tbf
So it’s now October 1st 2019 and I feel obligated to watch this now
It is now October 1st 2020
@@meelliottw its been 2 years 😔
It’s gonna be Halloween 2020. U watching it again?
A year later, and my life is falling apart and their content is the last thing keeping me sane 😭
Poison Wilde same 😔
"we are not gonna be those instagram people, phil, and chances are if you're watching this, you're not either"
i FEEL ATTACKED but i agree dan u right
*Dan and Phil confirming that their branding is actually just kinks and innuendos*
Phil has never sounded SO Northern as he did while saying "how many babies are in us right now?"
"Gimme the cigarette. I'm smoking it." -- I stand corrected
5:50 oh my god you’re right
I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING
I THOUGHT THAT TOO HAHA
"What about the axe in yehr 'ead?"
That too
Everything is Phil's child. Someone needs to draw a family portrait. Phil, Dil, Steve, Norman, Simon, the pumpkin, and all the others. Please.
Dan wearing those candy necklaces is my new aesthetic.
Same
best phil lines:
"that's the last time we're touching knives today"
"i'm getting close, dan"
"it's a lot stickier than i remember"
'' how many babies are in us right now ''
“My arm’s gonna be massive by the end of this.”
“it’s so wet”
“this is not the satisfying finger sensation i wanted”
“a really beautiful face or a beautiful ass”
“It’s one thick p”
“Stabbing these little babies to DEATH”
“They’re, like, proper sharp things”
Goddd i love all th replies.... And tje comment itself. ♥️ ♥️
They seem so much looser around each other on camera and just more relaxed in general lately. Seems like the tour did them a lot of good--they got to see that not all of their subscribers are teenage girls (which would be fine!) but the whole experience just seems to have helped their confidence and camera personalities exponentially!
My thoughts exactly! It's amazing to see this and it feels so nice to be seeing them as they are.
I was thinking that too. It's so nice to see them so happy
Thought i was the only one! This and their lil mukbang were such a joy to watch i didnt want them to end. They jsut seem so happy and honestly this is the soft nice content i need right now lmao
also the video opening to dan goin "hi :D" almost legitimately made me cry for real ,,my soul needed that nourishment
I have never been prouder nor happier
I like how Dan dropped everything to listen to Phils story at 11:47 - very attentive.
”I’m getting close Dan”
”Let’s do it together”
“This is the last time we’re touching knives”
“It’s a lot stickier than I remember”
“I’m going in”
“It’s really satisfying after you start”
“Ohhhhhh... Derekkkk...”
“Calm down there bub”
...
...
Elizaveta Uvarova this whole video was just a smut
ohhh nooo
ive been dying through this entire video
sooo many innuendos...
“Phils going in raw”
Derek Discanio is quaking
*"It's quite an intimate experience"*
"GIMME YOUR IPHONE, OR I'LL *SCOOP* YA!"
-Daniel Howell, October 31st, 2018
scooping is no joke. i accidentally stabbed myself with a pumpkin scooper and i was dripping blood and now have a scar.
Phil: "so wet"
Dan: "Oh my god your actually just going in... Phils going in raw people!"
SO MANY INUENDOS IM CRYING!
Lol in the beginning Phil said "I'm getting close Dan"
Im seven minutes in and my mind has gone wild. Whyyyy
INuendos
Who's here to cry because it's almost been 2 years 🤪
It's now 2 years 😭😭😭
Oh noes 😔😔😔
(violent crying)
I come back and watch this every year
“ we will never be those instagram people, phil. and *chances are if you’re watching this, you ain’t either* ”
hurt.
He called me out. I wasnt ready
yOOOO HAHA i felt personally attacked lmfao
_why is it true tho_
the truth hurts
Had to pause the video for a moment to let that sink in. Ouch.
Dan created a Trumpkin.
"you are more beautiful than the pumpkin you think you look like" is such a sweet way to end the video tbh
youtube: recommends this to me:
me: *its that time of the year again*
“That’s the last time we’re touching knives today”-Phil 2k18
“I’m getting close, Dan”-Phil again 2k18
“It’s stickier than I remember”- also Phil 2k18
hahaha i commented the 'best phil lines' and they were literally those 3
I'm glad I'm not the only one that picked up on all of those 😂
Breadbin Urine your username >
“These pumpkins are my self esteem. Empty.” Same Dan, same.
Well they're filled with air and a few seeds
*"How many babies are in us right now?* Phil there's no need to remind everyone you're a cannibal.
He could be saying he's preggo *ya know*
omg lmaoo
fun fact: pumpkins are technically considered berries
i'll see myself out
w o t
I cannot believe I finally found someone else who accepts this as fact. Thank you
@@Youdontneedtoknowwhy HOW PLS EXPLAIJ
@@imliterallyjesse "Berry" by definition according to Encyclopaedia Britannica: "Berry, in botany, a simple fleshy fruit that usually has many seeds, such as the banana, grape, and tomato. As a simple fruit, a berry is derived from a single ovary of an individual flower. The middle and inner layers of the fruit wall often are not distinct from each other."
@@Youdontneedtoknowwhy NO WAY OMG MY BRAIN IS FRIED
Half the video was Phil making inappropriate jokes and I’m living for that 😂😂😂
“Im getting close dan” *moans*
Philip Lester i swear to Jesus
THE INNUENDOS ARE DISTURBING
UwU Yoongi WHEN WAS THISSSS??? I must knowwww...for research purposes
Never mind!! I found it. It’s GLORIOUS
@@annaleev674 4:54, There u go
ok but yoonmin
victoriaa soto okay but yes
*DANS SNORT AT **8:15** IM SCREAMING*
THAT'S THE CUTEST THING OH MY GOD
Aww
i replayed it several times
*UWU INTENSIFIES*
charlotte cactussssss
Phil - “ but that’s the first edge of my quiff”
Me - “ so it’s a quedge”
*hysterical laughing and disappointed noises*
My last two brain cells during an exam
Baby Swift stop with your unfunny and stale jokes
Ruby yy what you on about that is a spicy and funny joke you just need a sense of humour
TRUEEEE
Caitlyn Kinsella that is not funny it is unoriginal edit:just like Dan and Phil
Ruby yy it doesn’t have to be original to be funny
*wow I can’t believe Phil invented drag*
Phil: he is beauty
he is grace
Dan: he is a better version of my face
- , _, -
I loved that
Julia S same
13:58 The feral energy of this is astounding
"How many babies are in us right now"
Phil. Why.
dan: someone’s just gonna take this video.. without the video.. and just the sounds are gonna be disgusting
_it only took you like ten baking videos to realise this._
Yea.. I feel always bad for people in my house at the time in the other room..
Phil:That's the last time we touch knives today.
Dan: Don't say that Phil. That's not... No.
...so it's NOT the last time you're touching knives today, Danny? >___>
@@vp3841 Aw, you knew just what to add to make me laugh at 5 am
who’s back here in october 2020 for some nostalgia cause we miss dan?
Also imagine being the person who told Phil to draw on cat whiskers in pinof 1 and started their whole cat whisker thing
Imagine the power that person withholds
I wonder if Phil’s first subscriber still watches them 🤔
Anime 456 don't worry, I do.
Jk that wasn't me.
@@Anime-mi9xo They're friends, so probably.
I always think about that person!!
Fun quotes form this videos
“ testicles”
“ flags this you have a responsibility”
“It’s time to get deep”
“It’s a lot stickier than I remember”
“ pumpkin spice is cinnamon and lies”
“It’s so wet”
“ Phil’s going in raw”
“This is an ASS pumpkin”
“AHAHAHAHAHAH”
*snort*
“ yack”
“This is some vore roll play”
“This pumpkin is my self esteem...empty”
“I’m doing hippo dan”
“I can’t believe you invented drag”
“I was a sexy emo”
And last but not least
“ oOf”
And
“WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING”
This has been twat central and thank you for listening to my ted talk
“Stabbing these little babies to death”
Twat Central *-VORE-*
GIMME THE IPHONE OR ILL SCOOP YA
7:42 not a specific quote but um...
I could only imagine what their neighbors think
innuendos and questionable quotes
1:13
4:23
4:54
5:14
5:50
5:56
6:01
6:58
7:02
7:06
7:16
8:23
10:04
10:13
so basically half of the video
this is like a jumpscare list but for if you're not a phannie
Thank
did you mean: the entire frickin video
@@anyasvt 0:00 to 20:19
"Daddy? Could you help me with my pumpkin?"
"YeS! tHiS iS tHe BoDy Of DeNiSe ThAt I mUrDeReD 55 yEaRs AgO- She was your real Mother"
It’s 25-
@@samhitha5365 lol
So does that mean they actually have matching aprons because Dan said about not wanting to wear the same one as Phil because it'd be embarrassing?
Probably
I think Phil just bought his and Dan decided not to buy that.
No he meant they can't wear the aprons they've worn before
I love your Randy profile pic
*s p o o p y*
someone needs to make a compilation of Dan and Phil out of context
it already exists. not sure if there's an updated/recent version, tho.
Yes !
Rachel Simmons yes!!😂
Yes
"GIMMIE YOUR IPHONE OR ILL SCOOP YA" *imaginary jabbing*
I died 😂
Twentyønechemical greendiscø me too
pov: youre here a year later, rewatching, to cope with your emotional trauma
yeah
I’m watching videos for nostalgia (not just Dan and Phil, but mostly them) and I’m crying for every one. I want to go back! 😣
He is beauty
He is grace
*He has a better version of my face*
Wilbur's beanie omg meee
Phil is either high on drugs and I want some of the same stuff or he's so ridiculously happy that he just can't stop giggling and I...want some of the same stuff.
Ok true but Dan laughs so much too I think they're both on drugs *where can I find me some*
dan makes phil ridiculously happy you didn't hear it from me
"Give me your IPhone...Or I'll scoop ya"
*Violently jabs the scoopy-thing at the camera*
Phil: Why doesn't it smell like pumpkin spice?
Dan: Because pumpkin spice is made out of cinnamon and LIES Phil
Me after buying pumpkin spice Pop Tarts
"We are not those Instagram people"
"The chances are if your watching this your not either"
😤😔 the truth hurts
Dan: they’re full of seeds aren’t they
Phil: how many babies are in us right now
Dan: flag this.!you have a responsibility. Flag this.
0:14 im crying look at dans hand
why was that the funniest part of this video
god fucking damnit i can’t be loud everyone is asleep
Either I'm tired or that's the funniest thing ever
@amazing existential danosaur I see you everywhere.
@@vishakhadwivedi6653 good
“Umm calm down there bub” - Daniel Howell 2018
Oml I thought I was the only one who picked up on it
time stamp?
steph 18:48
Army ayy
*sobs*
Dan: “I went as a sexy emo..”
Me: Dan, you’re always a sexy emo.
"I have less of a plan about this than I did when I applied to do frickin law at university."
i recover from a sexual innuendo, just to be hit with another one
“Testicles have seeds”- Dan
“Think How many children are inside of us.”- Phil
Pasta Productions y I subscribed
Only not because they aren't a full human/zygote/embryo until fertilization
(Still funny tho)
anyone else here in September 2020 trying to remember the good times?
*(Me before watching the video):If Dan doesn't carve a Shrek into his pumpkin I'm suing*
*(Me after watching the video): Same thing pretty much*
This has such a strong Dan and Phil crafts vibe
He is beauty
He is grace
He a better version of my face
Phil: “Stabbing things is fun”
Dan: for legal reasons “that’s a joke”
4:35