My issue with this discourse and any online conversation about celebrities bodies and surgery is that they pick someone apart, they get work done because they are constantly being photographed and picked apart, they get criticized for having work done, and everybody feeding into this obsession have a sense of selfrighteousness about doing so. They act like they're doing good and if you don't agree you're either delusional or being a part of they problem. Nobody taking accountability for how they make celebrities insecure or how they're making others obsessed by constantly talking about it. Maybe it's an issue as seeing celebrities as non human and seeing a girl who happens to sing get filler or lose weight as something she's specifically doing to trick you or advertise to you instead of just seeing a person existing. Idk if I'm making sense lol Can't wait to watch the rest of the video and hear your take!
You really hit the point, when you described disordered eating and obsession with being thin as a competition. When I had a friend that just wasn’t in the mood to eat and I ate my food, I would feel the need to bring up that how little I usually eat.
Thank you for this video. Honestly whats most disgusting to me is that people dont appear to care about whether shes healthy or not, i have saw people say she looks like the devil or that she looks really ugly or like a fishstick : ( Thats so rude i dont understand how anyone can feel comfortable calling someone that. Its disgusting and doesnt help anyone.
Wow yes, I can totally relate to this Eastern-European "eat everything that's on your plate" mindset, it regularly causes me issues when I underestimate the portion I've taken for myself and eat way beyond satisfaction. Like it's uncomfortable even without struggling without EDs. Your story with your husband reminds me of this rift in our mindsets with my friend who has some alcoholism, and they'll always finish their drink, not to let it go to waste, while I've thrown away half cans of beers when I realised the night was over, we are just going home now, and anything I'd drink now would just contribute to hangover.
I found that very valuable too, I have two (concerningly) thin friends (I'm the big one lol) and I always struggled what's to offer them, because "tough love" absolutely doesn't work here
Hey Dr. Ana, thank you for your honesty and I admire your strength in sharing your story. I don't think I could share something like this... I would feel so vulnerable and fragile.
Thank you! Honestly, secrecy is a huge part of the disorder, and I was so hush-hush about it for the first few years of having this channel. It wasn’t until I finally opened up that I realized the secrecy was giving it more power than it deserved.
Very good perspective here. As someone who has struggled with disordered eating myself, I find it worthwhile to point out that image, weight, and numbers are only surface level concerns. What an ED or DE patterns are about is control. There is often something else going on in a person's life (ongoing stressors) that cause a person to then nitpick over the one thing they have control over...their body and looks.
6:00. Totally! It’s bizarre to me. I’m having to distance myself from 2 of my closest friends, or who I thought were. They have started getting really weird about eating, food, and the scale. They constantly tell each other their weight, what they ate (or rather, didn’t) and how much they worked out.. I’m sitting here wondering, what in the actual Wintergirls sh** is this? I’ve always struggled with disordered eating, and now I’ve been diagnosed with epilepsy. I absolutely cannot starve myself anymore or make myself throw up every day anymore, or it can cause grand mal seizures. Also, that wouldn’t help me heal in general. The way they talk about their bodies and food disgusts me, I physically cannot hear it or be around it. And it makes me so sad, because I love my friends for way more than their bodies and I wish they saw themselves as more than a number.
I hate to say that I'm not too surprised with Ariana as I've seen the signs for so many years. I'm actually more shocked with cynthia, she was very into fitness and a few years ago looked so so healthy. I hope both of them get better soon.
Wow, really glad I watched this. It is totally counterintuitive to me that telling somebody with an eating disorder that they have lost weight to an unhealthy/dangerous level only reinforces the disorder. A while back I was involved with a woman who was super petite but always called themselves fat, even though they looked like a light breeze could knock them over. I never told them they were too thin, emaciated, etc, just that they were absolutely not fat, nowhere near being fat. And it didn't seem to have any sort of positive impact on their eating habits. Not sure if what I said helped, hurt, or made absolutely no difference.
Sometimes people say things like that as a way of reassurance-seeking when they’re feeling body distress, and the responses they get may give them a temporary moment of relief but then the reassurance-seeking compulsion worsens. Hardly anyone knows not to feed into it, don’t feel bad! You responded the best you could with the information you had. ❤
Thank you so much for sharing your insight. I found your videos because of your video about your ED. Still trying to create a healthier relationship with food, but that video helped me to feel like it was a possibility. I appreciate the way you shed light on this topics and draw upon your experiences.
Omg the body checking is so real! Though not a wrist grab, the whole “yes and?” Music video is like one big body check camera feed. Like the way she moves is DEFINITELY very coded and it’s unsettling.
I love that you always approach a topic with sincerity and candour, even when it's getting personal for you. Thanks for sharing! And congrats on the baby!
I was really upset seeing the opportunity for her to launch into the "I was even more unhealthy when I was eating more" script when prompted by an interview, with people cheering it on. I have heard it so many times.
This is interesting as someone who suffers more from overeating disordered tendencies, because from my understanding restricting is required particularly in more severe cases of overeating EDs. And about Ariana, I don’t like commenting on another person’s but especially a woman’s body. I don’t know if she has a restrictive ED or if she’s potentially sick in a different way. That said…I am worried about the little girls who are going to see Wicked, & are going to get Glinda doll, & think that such a small body is aspirational. Particularly little girls with parents that can’t or won’t discuss how to have a healthy relationship with food & one’s own body.
another celebrity - ice spice - was known for being thick and recently she has lost a lot of her weight especially with her latest insta post making people worried People are also joking about ozempic but eating disorders are quite a real problem nowadays that people don’t know how to help with at all. Btw Ariana Grande has impersonator that she hates - named PaigeNiemann - who pretends to be her copying her looks and also been losing a lot of weight. its insane to say at least…
I by no means am a source of anything other than anecdotes. But it is definitely true that people with EDs also have a passive or conscious death wish. As someone who spent a lot of times in some of the more concerning online communities of that nature. They are intimately intertwined
Hi, Ana! Thank you so much for talking about this in such a responsible way. Would you mind to make more videos on the topic? I like the way you bring studies and researches in a light and succinct way. I feel like my group of friends is a little bit on the verge of a competitive e.d. lately and I might get some new insights with your views and experiences.
This is so helpful - one of my favourite people in the world has a restrictive ED and I’ve always wanted to make her feel cherished because I know she’s struggling, but I’ve never known quite how to be there for her in the ways she needs. These pointers are so helpful - thank you for sharing this and for sharing your own experience! I love your channel 💞 PS congratulations on your pregnancy! I’m currently four months with my 1st and overwhelmed with excitement and nerves all at once lol - I have a feeling you’ll be an amazing mom 🥰
thank you so much for sharing your experience, it has helped me realise how unhealthy my behaviour was getting. I never thought I had a serious issue and hearing you makes me think I have to continue on my healing path even tho I'm much better now
I'm a male who struggled with a restrictive eating disorder. It got really bad around the time I was 18 to 19. I got more comfortable eating freely up until early this year, when I developed this huge crush and my eating disorder reemerged. I think I lost around 20-30 pounds over the course of three months. I appreciate you sharing this story and understand the struggle
It is interesting to hear this mechanism for it being negative for the person with the disorder, but when it comes to a public figure I wonder if society _not_ calling it out as unhealthy would be worse overall since then her fans that don't currently have the disorder and would be thinking more "rationally" would be less likely to want to emulate her. The harms to her millions of fans by society not vocally calling out just how unhealthy and concerning her health status is could be far worse than her issue of her individually being put into greater risk.
My issue is with the women I've seen in comment sections saying her 'muscular physique' is 'goals'. Most people don't understand the lengths you have to take to get there and the danger of being swallowed up by an obsession they never even intended to have. I have lived it and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I never intended to become sick and I also never realised how long it would take me to get better (if I ever fully will) I thought we got rid of h3r0in chic as a society, I don't want it back and I don't think its out of line to dissuade people from wanting to emulate it.
Congrats on the pregnancy!!! I do wanna say I have a history with anorexia specifically and I never thought of it as a competitive disorder. I definitely kept it to myself a lot and the height of the disorder was during COVID so it really wasn't that hard to hide it. I also didn't really view it as "I need to get sicker" but I do still have thoughts today of "I'm not sick enough to get help" even though it does still have a huge affect on my life today. It's really interesting to think of it like that. Like it makes sense that in actuality it wasn't "I need to get thinner" because at the end of the day it was unhealthy so it does make sense that it was "I need to get sicker". I learn new stuff from you with topics I've always struggled with and it's amazing. I'm gonna go cry now (in a good way, thank you I felt very heard and seen with this video).
I have multiple invisible disabilities so I'm the first person to say that health status cannot be seen. We have no idea what could or couldn't be going on with a stranger or even someone we know well. But what concerns me is young people thinking that thinness is peak "health" and/or "attractiveness." Also B'sha'ah Tovah on your pregnancy!
For me the issue is not her own psychology, it is that of her young fans. She is this generation of young people’s Kate Moss except she is in an even more influential position, with her most recent role boosting that influence even more.
THANK YOU. Thank you so much for making this video. Seriously. I've been seriously freaked out by this discourse over the last while, since as the debate's been largely on 'is she healthy (as internet denizens are concerned)', rather than on 'no matter what, is this really helpful to discuss?'. Because every comment on 'she looks sick' has been... well, yeah, it's just more fuel to add to the fire. Not only to the fire of a condition she may or may not be experiencing, but of the fire of everyone out there with restrictive EDs. As after all, we tend to take being called 'healthy' as something to be ashamed of - so, people using Ariana Grande as a cultural yardstick of 'this is what unhealthy is meant to look like'/'this is anorexia' are inadvertently setting a bar that those with restrictive EDs now feel they have to achieve. In calling her 'unhealthy' and attempting to shame her out of a disorder that ultimately, we have no right to pry into, we're actually shaming the sick among us for not being her, and made her into the arbitrary number - or the arbitrary size - that we feel we have to be. That's so, so scary. I'm recovered from atypical AN, but truthfully, it never really disappears - and the thing as, as someone who even in the depths of a hideous disease never was able to measure up to that yardstick, I felt - and feel, still - that I will never really be that sick, because not skinny enough. And, y'know, given that those of us with restrictive EDs do on some level have an unconscious or semi-conscious death wish, using celebrities as the benchmark of 'close to death' is as saying to many people that 'you don't wish to die that badly, so you don't have an issue' - or, at least, that's how we're gonna read it. Never mind that a death wish *should* be cause for worry. It's so incredibly disrespectful to Ariana to comment on her looking 'bad', in that ultimately, diseases aren't chosen, and if it is AN, AN is not a choice - it's an illness that's incredibly difficult to escape. So commentary on her appearance is not only shaming her/disrespecting her worth as a human, but also doing so while giving her implicit praise for any potential restrictive ED *and* granting her enough misery to reinforce the core of said potential ED. And since she is the modern cultural yardstick for what AN is 'supposed to' look like, it's therefore implicitly commenting on the bodies of all of us with restrictive EDs - 'if you are this sick, shame on you, because you're ugly, and if you're not, you aren't sick enough to be worth listening to'. The disrespect to Ariana is also going to, if she does have an ED, avoid talking about it. Restriction, after all, thrives in silence; and if she's being shamed for sickness, that's not exactly fuel to admit it. If it's another health problem and not an ED, it's a hideous pressure on her to open up about something that is her personal business. Ughhhh. So, seriously, thank you for making this video. It's so, so appreciated, honestly. P. S. Congratulations on the pregnancy!
Question regarding 3:48, does this also apply to those of the opposite spectrum of an eating disorder? Like if/when overweight/obese people are being told that they look fat, it triggers/motivates them too eat more? Just a genuine question because I'm struggling with it.
thank you for this!! I'm tired of seeing people fuel so so so much attention into female celebrities bodies. Just stop!! There are conversations to be had about why skinny women are casted more, but that doesn't mean it's okay to point to specific women and make all sorts of comments on their bodies...
Using the words 'accusing' for having a plastic surgery/beauty treatment is the most concernig and dangerous thing. Person decided what to do to their own body, in majority of cases within a reason, and people treat them as if they commitet a crime.
Yeah the thing is, it is completely unintuitive to someone who has never had a disorder to know how to react. I know because my ex and my sister had an eating disorder. now you explained it (bit late) but like it is you have to not address the elephant in the room, but dance around the elephant in the room. If I notice your relationship to food is deteriorating, for example I made food but you regularly do not finish your plate I will say something of that, but usually the objective perspective is all that I have. I don't know the relationship to food of even my best friends, but I would be able to tell if they went very anorexik or boolimia. The most straightforward thing when someone has lost weight, is to mention someone has lost weight. It isn't to ask about their favorite food. I could and I will, but I am sure that if you hadn't told me I wouldn't and likewise many people don't. I mean it is weirdly political. Usually politics is also about dancing around the truth.
11:20 I am not a licensed psychiatrist, didn't do psychology in the first place, but my problem is, I can't. I can't lie in this situation. How can I love you more than you love yourself, especially because you are probably unable to treat me better than you treat yourself. You are probably treating me terribly, and yourself terribly. I cannot connect with most unresolved trauma individuals because I cannot lie and I cannot pretend. I get sucked into the discourse. I cannot keep a mental distance. The only thing I can do is to part ways in good faith and let my discontent be known. I don't know what I would do as a parent when my child would have this disorder, I am 25 and I have no children, but maybe in 20 years I'll get into this situation. I would feel very sad. Like I didn't do well enough to protect my daughter from dangerous ideologies. I would inadvertently take responsibility, even if it wouldn't be my fault.
I have ARFID, as well as some health issues, and people thinking I had anorexia was kind of damaging. I feel like my diagnosis was missed for a long time because it didn't present the way an eating disorder usually would. If I had been aware, I'd have gotten treatment, but I thought I was physically sick rather than mentally as well. I'm pursuing recovery now, and it's extremely difficult. At my worst, I definitely suspect it was subconscious self harm or a subconscious death wish. I don't know why, though. I didn't notice my eating disorder until I was so sick it was hardly possible not to start questioning things. I appreciate this video, people shouldn't really jump to conclusions about other people's health staus, disorders or weight. Plus I like to know how to support people with anorexia, since I don't relate to some parts of that disorder. I have to be careful what I say about my own experience around them.
Hey, I'm a fan from Brazil and I really love all of your content, I watch your videos every single week. I would really love to buy your workbooks/journals, but Amazon won't ship it to Brazil :( Is there any way I could buy it digitally? Maybe on PDF so I could print it (I have trouble reading on Kindle, but that would be a great option too)
I am not here to pick on a public figure. That said, the industry, can cause mental and emotional damage. You put yourself out their and all the haters rush in. These faceless and feckless comics are scum and bottom feeders. I have compassion on the hurting, yet, I know I risk losing myself trying to help them, without proper tools and a healthy skill set. She needs love and support as we all do.
I really hope Ana will be making content in relation to pregnancy and parenthood. Postnatal mental health, how having a child can open up past wounds, maybe books such as "The book you wish your parents read" or "parenting with PTSD", more about parenting philosophies and trends, etc. I'm here for it. 🙂
I was treated for an ED when I was 15, so I remember what that was like, this past year I just felt nauseous 🤢 all the time 🤢 and I lost a bunch of weight but not on purpose, I’m better now, thankfully and my face looks younger when I’m healthy. But I’m saying, our world is a lil nauseating lately, 😢 it can be emotional like I couldn’t eat but I wasn’t trying to be skinny. I’m so happy now my boo 👻 bees 🐝 are back
I completely agree I was banned from the snark page on Reddit for Ariana grande because I said you guys aren’t helping her disorder by constantly picking at her appearance
This was such a good video! Is it an eating disorder if I eat everything that’s on my plate so Im more full & don’t get hungry later or in the middle of the night? Eating feels more that a chore as an adult so I sometimes like to eat one big meal to avoid having to eat again later. I love leftovers though!
my parents grew up during the cultural revolution in china so I was also taught to finish everything on my plate, but my mom would also criticize me when I was fat :(
It was a bit of a throw away point, but long term lyme disease is a real thing. I personally have the UK variant and while it's not very understood I can vouch for their being real with physical symptoms. I've been to psychologists, doctors, infectious disease specialists and even had some relatively effective treatment. No cure, unfortunately, but treatment that's helped with a number of symptoms at the very least. What's clear though is that it's physical and real. It took a good few years to even touch on it being Lyme disease and until then it was anti-depression meds, that obviously didn't help at all, and seeing a psychologist who said they were convinced it wasn't psychosomatic. (There's some debate as to whether it's specifically Lyme disease in a long term form, or whether it's similar to Long Covid and is actually an autoimmune reaction or something similar left behind after a viral infection. Either way, the symptoms are physical and very much real.) Either way, just wanted to leave this comment because I honestly found it very insensitive for you to suggest that the last 10 years of disability I've experienced with this illness was just faked. I'm not saying some Celebrities haven't faked illnesses or used real illnesses to garner sympathy and mask personal failures... but the illness itself is real and there are real victims, so please bear that in mind before doubting someone.
Really appreciate your thoughts in this video and sharing your own experience. Also, congratulations on the pregnancy, how exciting! Kimberly Foster has a video discussing this issue, and one of her points was that because of Ariana Grande’s position as the lead in a big movie that a bunch of girls are going to go see, this is not only about Ariana Grande anymore. It’s also about how girls and teens will compare their body to hers and see her as someone to emulate. When we talk about this issue, how Ariana might personally respond or take the criticism cannot be our only consideration. I don’t know the right way to talk about this, but I know we do have to talk about it somehow. If you watch Kimberly’s video, note that a good half of it is responding to people’s comments. The real meat of the video is in the first half.
Amazing and morbid subject. Auto Munchausen? Appreciate your personal & professional insights. I remember a great defensive third baseman in MLB whose power production went way up with steroids. Older BB fans will know who I'm talking about. He loved the attention and said the steroid problems were worth the fame. But 50% or more were using steroids so he just kept taking more, more, more and got into a kind of death spiral of low testosterone inducing depression.. So as his connective tissue and kidneys and testicles and mental health suffered he added cocaine and heroin to the steroid use. Died at the age of 41, damaged, depressed and miserable.
Wow I didn’t expect you to make a video on Ariana Grande but I’ve seriously been thinking the same thing for months Ana! I loveee the way you see things in our world 🫶
Congratulations. Be careful and pay attention to your hormones. But don’t let them dictate your emotions. I’ve had my hormones fool me for no logical reason. I’ve had times where I fast and I’m OK for 3 days. I’ve had other times when my appetite is gone and the thought of food makes me nauseous. It’s been a roller coaster ride learning. Some people like me thin and others like some weight. My body and hormones don’t want to be ill or a victim. I’m used to doing it on my own. Asking for help and blabbing about feelings is useless. Psychologists cost money - and I have to talk, talk and talk. I know metric and American measurements. Do what’s best. So what serves you best without over analyzing. So many people eat without appreciating. Our family had the don’t waste food mindset. I’m not as fastidious about things as you are Dr. Ana. I can’t savour food anymore. I just eat for nutrition. The words you use when you speak in your inner voice are thee most important words of all! Be cognizant of being cavalier with the self dialogue. Maybe they need a hug. Even if it’s virtual
I know people can wear whatever they want, but as someone who struggled with a restrictive ED for years, it is so triggering to see A.G.'s bones so visibly. I feel that her pride in her thinness literalky is being put on display with her wardrobe choices, and it makes me feel upset because of the young girls who lool up to her and may aspire to shrink down to her size. It would somehow feel different to me if AG dressed more conservatively and didnt display her potential ED.
I like artists and care a little what goes on with them but Ariana Grande is not one of them; I do get concerned though when they get so thin, I remember back in time when Whitney Houston turned into a skeleton - because of drug use. It was scary to see her. it is always some type of big problem when people lose too much weight and it is interesting to know why,, but when they gain ppl also jump on them and complain - even more - especially nowadays with internet..When I was eating little when younger I maintained my weight mostly. May metabolism already sucked. Now, I cannot stay hungry anymore. I probably eat instead of socializing.
Ummm... She's definitely very skinny but i think some of those pictures were edited to make her look way more skinny than she actually is and that is a horrible thing to do
Most likely more than half the people making little videos about her weight don’t even really care. They just want content and likes. ….on a more positive note, congratulations!!
I wonder why is it okay to tell a thin person (which Ariana has always been) to “eat a cheeseburger”, but telling an overweight person to stop eating would be considered offensive. That’s why I never believed in body positivity - you’re only allowed to be positive about your body if you’re fat, and no one can comment on it
As an overweight person, I've been told that more than I could count, both by my relatives and boyfriends, and they never saw anything wrong with it. Please don't turn this into an oppression contest, because NO MATTER the weight, women can never win and be considered enough
@@anahatabetamercetias an insult maybe. That’s not what I meant. Nobody goes around expressing concern about people who are overweight (75% of Americans) and telling them they should “eat less”
@@anya_d yes, they do. Shame goes both ways. You seem to have a bias and when someone disputes it you change the goalpost of what you're meaning. It goes both ways, both side of the criticism are wrong, body positivity also goes both ways. The reason there's a focus on fat people is because of societies abhorrent treatment of fat people vs skinny people. It's systemic. Not just a mean thing said here or there, although that is a small part that contributes to a larger issue.
@roberttorres6552 you can be whining all day lol. I'm not here to protect the evil whether the devil is eating her from inside out or not. Plus u didn't describe how my morals make me a hypocrite. Idc about the evil thats all cuz protect them at what cost?
wanting to understand someone's thought process does not mean you want you root for them. that's literally how you prevent bad things from happening in the first place
My issue with this discourse and any online conversation about celebrities bodies and surgery is that they pick someone apart, they get work done because they are constantly being photographed and picked apart, they get criticized for having work done, and everybody feeding into this obsession have a sense of selfrighteousness about doing so. They act like they're doing good and if you don't agree you're either delusional or being a part of they problem. Nobody taking accountability for how they make celebrities insecure or how they're making others obsessed by constantly talking about it.
Maybe it's an issue as seeing celebrities as non human and seeing a girl who happens to sing get filler or lose weight as something she's specifically doing to trick you or advertise to you instead of just seeing a person existing. Idk if I'm making sense lol
Can't wait to watch the rest of the video and hear your take!
Don't blame regular society. That's a media problem. Media push to the masses. Nobody forces surgery on anyone but themselves. Or anything else.
Interesting to hear about the competition aspect of ED considering that both Ariana and Cynthia are being accused of having this disorder.
You really hit the point, when you described disordered eating and obsession with being thin as a competition. When I had a friend that just wasn’t in the mood to eat and I ate my food, I would feel the need to bring up that how little I usually eat.
That casual pregnancy announcement tho. Congrats! 🎉🎉
I said wait whattt. CONGRATS!
Pregnant!!! WHO?
Yess congrats to dr. Ana!
Thank you ☺️
@@xxaavviieerrrrr my dyslexic brain saw ! as and l... Any, congrats doc!
Thank you for this video. Honestly whats most disgusting to me is that people dont appear to care about whether shes healthy or not, i have saw people say she looks like the devil or that she looks really ugly or like a fishstick : ( Thats so rude i dont understand how anyone can feel comfortable calling someone that. Its disgusting and doesnt help anyone.
Agreed
Wow yes, I can totally relate to this Eastern-European "eat everything that's on your plate" mindset, it regularly causes me issues when I underestimate the portion I've taken for myself and eat way beyond satisfaction. Like it's uncomfortable even without struggling without EDs. Your story with your husband reminds me of this rift in our mindsets with my friend who has some alcoholism, and they'll always finish their drink, not to let it go to waste, while I've thrown away half cans of beers when I realised the night was over, we are just going home now, and anything I'd drink now would just contribute to hangover.
Any child would be lucky to have a mother like this!
agreed, my parents are so stupid
@tianna13 most people are, and so, most parents are. 😆
Having a clinical psychology trained parent is a cheat code envious!
Am I the only one who just heard you're pregnant? Congratulations!
I’m just learning this too 😂 Congrats!!
I didn’t hear that too? Where does it say that
omggg ive been watching her since she started thats actually adorable
Yep she said it, Congratulations🎂
Thank you! I had posted the announcement over on my second channel Book & Hearth, since I keep most of the more personal videos on there recently 😊
I never saw it as someone having a death wish. Thanks for the advise on what to say instead of commenting on their bodies!
I found that very valuable too, I have two (concerningly) thin friends (I'm the big one lol) and I always struggled what's to offer them, because "tough love" absolutely doesn't work here
Hey Dr. Ana, thank you for your honesty and I admire your strength in sharing your story. I don't think I could share something like this... I would feel so vulnerable and fragile.
Thank you! Honestly, secrecy is a huge part of the disorder, and I was so hush-hush about it for the first few years of having this channel. It wasn’t until I finally opened up that I realized the secrecy was giving it more power than it deserved.
@AnaPsychology I think I might have an eating disorder too, I just feel so much shame about it I find it hard to get help.
I wish I had more help during my Ed, I was just told to "eat more" would have been nice to be around someone understanding or helpful
Very good perspective here. As someone who has struggled with disordered eating myself, I find it worthwhile to point out that image, weight, and numbers are only surface level concerns. What an ED or DE patterns are about is control. There is often something else going on in a person's life (ongoing stressors) that cause a person to then nitpick over the one thing they have control over...their body and looks.
Congratulations on your pregnancy! So exciting ❤ hope it's all going well so far xx
Thank you!! 😊 it is!
6:00. Totally! It’s bizarre to me. I’m having to distance myself from 2 of my closest friends, or who I thought were. They have started getting really weird about eating, food, and the scale. They constantly tell each other their weight, what they ate (or rather, didn’t) and how much they worked out.. I’m sitting here wondering, what in the actual Wintergirls sh** is this?
I’ve always struggled with disordered eating, and now I’ve been diagnosed with epilepsy. I absolutely cannot starve myself anymore or make myself throw up every day anymore, or it can cause grand mal seizures. Also, that wouldn’t help me heal in general.
The way they talk about their bodies and food disgusts me, I physically cannot hear it or be around it. And it makes me so sad, because I love my friends for way more than their bodies and I wish they saw themselves as more than a number.
I hate to say that I'm not too surprised with Ariana as I've seen the signs for so many years. I'm actually more shocked with cynthia, she was very into fitness and a few years ago looked so so healthy. I hope both of them get better soon.
Orthorexia is an eating disorder centered around hyper "healthy" eating and over-exercising.
Wow, really glad I watched this. It is totally counterintuitive to me that telling somebody with an eating disorder that they have lost weight to an unhealthy/dangerous level only reinforces the disorder. A while back I was involved with a woman who was super petite but always called themselves fat, even though they looked like a light breeze could knock them over. I never told them they were too thin, emaciated, etc, just that they were absolutely not fat, nowhere near being fat. And it didn't seem to have any sort of positive impact on their eating habits. Not sure if what I said helped, hurt, or made absolutely no difference.
Sometimes people say things like that as a way of reassurance-seeking when they’re feeling body distress, and the responses they get may give them a temporary moment of relief but then the reassurance-seeking compulsion worsens. Hardly anyone knows not to feed into it, don’t feel bad! You responded the best you could with the information you had. ❤
That was the only video needed for this topic. Thank you!!
Thank you so much for sharing your insight. I found your videos because of your video about your ED. Still trying to create a healthier relationship with food, but that video helped me to feel like it was a possibility. I appreciate the way you shed light on this topics and draw upon your experiences.
I’m so glad it helped a little🥹 thanks for being here!
Omg the body checking is so real! Though not a wrist grab, the whole “yes and?” Music video is like one big body check camera feed. Like the way she moves is DEFINITELY very coded and it’s unsettling.
I love that you always approach a topic with sincerity and candour, even when it's getting personal for you. Thanks for sharing!
And congrats on the baby!
Wow this is very eye opening. Thanks for sharing your experience as well Dr Ana. Cheers
I was really upset seeing the opportunity for her to launch into the "I was even more unhealthy when I was eating more" script when prompted by an interview, with people cheering it on. I have heard it so many times.
This is interesting as someone who suffers more from overeating disordered tendencies, because from my understanding restricting is required particularly in more severe cases of overeating EDs.
And about Ariana, I don’t like commenting on another person’s but especially a woman’s body. I don’t know if she has a restrictive ED or if she’s potentially sick in a different way. That said…I am worried about the little girls who are going to see Wicked, & are going to get Glinda doll, & think that such a small body is aspirational. Particularly little girls with parents that can’t or won’t discuss how to have a healthy relationship with food & one’s own body.
Good comment. Grande is a public figure & and sadly, a role model for many young girls.
another celebrity - ice spice - was known for being thick and recently she has lost a lot of her weight especially with her latest insta post making people worried
People are also joking about ozempic but eating disorders are quite a real problem nowadays that people don’t know how to help with at all.
Btw Ariana Grande has impersonator that she hates - named PaigeNiemann - who pretends to be her copying her looks and also been losing a lot of weight. its insane to say at least…
I by no means am a source of anything other than anecdotes. But it is definitely true that people with EDs also have a passive or conscious death wish. As someone who spent a lot of times in some of the more concerning online communities of that nature. They are intimately intertwined
Hi, Ana! Thank you so much for talking about this in such a responsible way. Would you mind to make more videos on the topic? I like the way you bring studies and researches in a light and succinct way. I feel like my group of friends is a little bit on the verge of a competitive e.d. lately and I might get some new insights with your views and experiences.
This is so helpful - one of my favourite people in the world has a restrictive ED and I’ve always wanted to make her feel cherished because I know she’s struggling, but I’ve never known quite how to be there for her in the ways she needs.
These pointers are so helpful - thank you for sharing this and for sharing your own experience! I love your channel 💞
PS congratulations on your pregnancy! I’m currently four months with my 1st and overwhelmed with excitement and nerves all at once lol - I have a feeling you’ll be an amazing mom 🥰
Congrats Dr Ana, wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy and painless delivery
Congratulations Ana!! So happy for you🎉💖
thank you so much for sharing your experience, it has helped me realise how unhealthy my behaviour was getting. I never thought I had a serious issue and hearing you makes me think I have to continue on my healing path even tho I'm much better now
That was so insightful. Thank you
I'm a male who struggled with a restrictive eating disorder. It got really bad around the time I was 18 to 19. I got more comfortable eating freely up until early this year, when I developed this huge crush and my eating disorder reemerged. I think I lost around 20-30 pounds over the course of three months. I appreciate you sharing this story and understand the struggle
It is interesting to hear this mechanism for it being negative for the person with the disorder, but when it comes to a public figure I wonder if society _not_ calling it out as unhealthy would be worse overall since then her fans that don't currently have the disorder and would be thinking more "rationally" would be less likely to want to emulate her. The harms to her millions of fans by society not vocally calling out just how unhealthy and concerning her health status is could be far worse than her issue of her individually being put into greater risk.
wow i love this video! so insightful and respectful and seeing the human in ariana.
Congrats and thank you for this video. Including sharing your own vulnerabilities. ❤
Legit tea. I have body dysmorphia long since i could remember and can confirm this.
My issue is with the women I've seen in comment sections saying her 'muscular physique' is 'goals'.
Most people don't understand the lengths you have to take to get there and the danger of being swallowed up by an obsession they never even intended to have.
I have lived it and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I never intended to become sick and I also never realised how long it would take me to get better (if I ever fully will)
I thought we got rid of h3r0in chic as a society, I don't want it back and I don't think its out of line to dissuade people from wanting to emulate it.
Omg Anna I remember watching that video , I didn’t know you were struggling through such a hard time 😢😭
Also CONGRATSSSSS🎉
Congratulations, i wish you the best with ur pregnancy, may it go smoothly🎂👍
This was unexpected, I had totally wrong assumptions about how to approach someone with an eating disorder. I hope more people find this video.
Congrats on the pregnancy!!!
I do wanna say I have a history with anorexia specifically and I never thought of it as a competitive disorder. I definitely kept it to myself a lot and the height of the disorder was during COVID so it really wasn't that hard to hide it. I also didn't really view it as "I need to get sicker" but I do still have thoughts today of "I'm not sick enough to get help" even though it does still have a huge affect on my life today. It's really interesting to think of it like that. Like it makes sense that in actuality it wasn't "I need to get thinner" because at the end of the day it was unhealthy so it does make sense that it was "I need to get sicker".
I learn new stuff from you with topics I've always struggled with and it's amazing. I'm gonna go cry now (in a good way, thank you I felt very heard and seen with this video).
This was fascinating. Thank you
3:53 is exactly how i feel but in another context, every time someone say something about me i feel like i'm being attacked :(
Hi Ana, can you do a video about the steps you took to move to Europe? Living in NA myself and am weighing the move.
Was about to dislike bc I thought you were gonna say she is not (allegedly) anoxeric. Thanks for adding to the discourse, this is very insightful!
Great and useful tips! Thank you!
I have multiple invisible disabilities so I'm the first person to say that health status cannot be seen. We have no idea what could or couldn't be going on with a stranger or even someone we know well. But what concerns me is young people thinking that thinness is peak "health" and/or "attractiveness."
Also B'sha'ah Tovah on your pregnancy!
I have never heard this about anorexia. Thank you for sharing and especially educating. This will help a ton.
For me the issue is not her own psychology, it is that of her young fans. She is this generation of young people’s Kate Moss except she is in an even more influential position, with her most recent role boosting that influence even more.
Some public figures are mentally ill. It'd be ableist to disparage them for something out of their control.
@ who is condoning disparagement?
6:42 Now that you’re WHAT??? Omg congratulations!!!! You’re gonna be the bestest mom
Congratulations on your pregnancy and thank you for sharing your story with us
So nice to see people care though, usually they act like the only unhealthy body is an overweight one when an underweight one is just as dangerous 😢
Absolutely, society has no problem commenting on overweight folk, especially women.
Interestingly enough, I really enjoy the different perspectives of 97% of those who gave commentary.
THANK YOU.
Thank you so much for making this video. Seriously. I've been seriously freaked out by this discourse over the last while, since as the debate's been largely on 'is she healthy (as internet denizens are concerned)', rather than on 'no matter what, is this really helpful to discuss?'. Because every comment on 'she looks sick' has been... well, yeah, it's just more fuel to add to the fire. Not only to the fire of a condition she may or may not be experiencing, but of the fire of everyone out there with restrictive EDs. As after all, we tend to take being called 'healthy' as something to be ashamed of - so, people using Ariana Grande as a cultural yardstick of 'this is what unhealthy is meant to look like'/'this is anorexia' are inadvertently setting a bar that those with restrictive EDs now feel they have to achieve. In calling her 'unhealthy' and attempting to shame her out of a disorder that ultimately, we have no right to pry into, we're actually shaming the sick among us for not being her, and made her into the arbitrary number - or the arbitrary size - that we feel we have to be. That's so, so scary. I'm recovered from atypical AN, but truthfully, it never really disappears - and the thing as, as someone who even in the depths of a hideous disease never was able to measure up to that yardstick, I felt - and feel, still - that I will never really be that sick, because not skinny enough. And, y'know, given that those of us with restrictive EDs do on some level have an unconscious or semi-conscious death wish, using celebrities as the benchmark of 'close to death' is as saying to many people that 'you don't wish to die that badly, so you don't have an issue' - or, at least, that's how we're gonna read it. Never mind that a death wish *should* be cause for worry.
It's so incredibly disrespectful to Ariana to comment on her looking 'bad', in that ultimately, diseases aren't chosen, and if it is AN, AN is not a choice - it's an illness that's incredibly difficult to escape. So commentary on her appearance is not only shaming her/disrespecting her worth as a human, but also doing so while giving her implicit praise for any potential restrictive ED *and* granting her enough misery to reinforce the core of said potential ED. And since she is the modern cultural yardstick for what AN is 'supposed to' look like, it's therefore implicitly commenting on the bodies of all of us with restrictive EDs - 'if you are this sick, shame on you, because you're ugly, and if you're not, you aren't sick enough to be worth listening to'. The disrespect to Ariana is also going to, if she does have an ED, avoid talking about it. Restriction, after all, thrives in silence; and if she's being shamed for sickness, that's not exactly fuel to admit it. If it's another health problem and not an ED, it's a hideous pressure on her to open up about something that is her personal business. Ughhhh.
So, seriously, thank you for making this video. It's so, so appreciated, honestly.
P. S. Congratulations on the pregnancy!
This is very insightful.
The movie to the bone really gets it.
Question regarding 3:48, does this also apply to those of the opposite spectrum of an eating disorder? Like if/when overweight/obese people are being told that they look fat, it triggers/motivates them too eat more? Just a genuine question because I'm struggling with it.
Thank you for this. I relate to this so much, all the way down to the Eastern European upbringing.
thank you for this!! I'm tired of seeing people fuel so so so much attention into female celebrities bodies. Just stop!! There are conversations to be had about why skinny women are casted more, but that doesn't mean it's okay to point to specific women and make all sorts of comments on their bodies...
Using the words 'accusing' for having a plastic surgery/beauty treatment is the most concernig and dangerous thing. Person decided what to do to their own body, in majority of cases within a reason, and people treat them as if they commitet a crime.
Yeah the thing is, it is completely unintuitive to someone who has never had a disorder to know how to react. I know because my ex and my sister had an eating disorder. now you explained it (bit late) but like it is you have to not address the elephant in the room, but dance around the elephant in the room. If I notice your relationship to food is deteriorating, for example I made food but you regularly do not finish your plate I will say something of that, but usually the objective perspective is all that I have. I don't know the relationship to food of even my best friends, but I would be able to tell if they went very anorexik or boolimia. The most straightforward thing when someone has lost weight, is to mention someone has lost weight. It isn't to ask about their favorite food. I could and I will, but I am sure that if you hadn't told me I wouldn't and likewise many people don't. I mean it is weirdly political. Usually politics is also about dancing around the truth.
11:20 I am not a licensed psychiatrist, didn't do psychology in the first place, but my problem is, I can't. I can't lie in this situation. How can I love you more than you love yourself, especially because you are probably unable to treat me better than you treat yourself. You are probably treating me terribly, and yourself terribly. I cannot connect with most unresolved trauma individuals because I cannot lie and I cannot pretend. I get sucked into the discourse. I cannot keep a mental distance. The only thing I can do is to part ways in good faith and let my discontent be known. I don't know what I would do as a parent when my child would have this disorder, I am 25 and I have no children, but maybe in 20 years I'll get into this situation. I would feel very sad. Like I didn't do well enough to protect my daughter from dangerous ideologies. I would inadvertently take responsibility, even if it wouldn't be my fault.
I have ARFID, as well as some health issues, and people thinking I had anorexia was kind of damaging. I feel like my diagnosis was missed for a long time because it didn't present the way an eating disorder usually would.
If I had been aware, I'd have gotten treatment, but I thought I was physically sick rather than mentally as well.
I'm pursuing recovery now, and it's extremely difficult.
At my worst, I definitely suspect it was subconscious self harm or a subconscious death wish. I don't know why, though. I didn't notice my eating disorder until I was so sick it was hardly possible not to start questioning things.
I appreciate this video, people shouldn't really jump to conclusions about other people's health staus, disorders or weight. Plus I like to know how to support people with anorexia, since I don't relate to some parts of that disorder. I have to be careful what I say about my own experience around them.
Congratulations on your pregnancy. ❤🎉🥰
Hey, I'm a fan from Brazil and I really love all of your content, I watch your videos every single week. I would really love to buy your workbooks/journals, but Amazon won't ship it to Brazil :(
Is there any way I could buy it digitally? Maybe on PDF so I could print it (I have trouble reading on Kindle, but that would be a great option too)
I am not here to pick on a public figure. That said, the industry, can cause mental and emotional damage. You put yourself out their and all the haters rush in. These faceless and feckless comics are scum and bottom feeders. I have compassion on the hurting, yet, I know I risk losing myself trying to help them, without proper tools and a healthy skill set. She needs love and support as we all do.
@@roberttorres6552 you risk losing yourself by caring for the evil lol. That'll catch onto u later in life
I really hope Ana will be making content in relation to pregnancy and parenthood. Postnatal mental health, how having a child can open up past wounds, maybe books such as "The book you wish your parents read" or "parenting with PTSD", more about parenting philosophies and trends, etc. I'm here for it. 🙂
I was treated for an ED when I was 15, so I remember what that was like, this past year I just felt nauseous 🤢 all the time 🤢 and I lost a bunch of weight but not on purpose, I’m better now, thankfully and my face looks younger when I’m healthy. But I’m saying, our world is a lil nauseating lately, 😢 it can be emotional like I couldn’t eat but I wasn’t trying to be skinny. I’m so happy now my boo 👻 bees 🐝 are back
I completely agree I was banned from the snark page on Reddit for Ariana grande because I said you guys aren’t helping her disorder by constantly picking at her appearance
Would you say that those with ARFID have a subconscious death wish? I have struggled with ARFID since I was a kid & meat was introduced to me.
What country did you move to, just curious
This was such a good video! Is it an eating disorder if I eat everything that’s on my plate so Im more full & don’t get hungry later or in the middle of the night? Eating feels more that a chore as an adult so I sometimes like to eat one big meal to avoid having to eat again later. I love leftovers though!
my parents grew up during the cultural revolution in china so I was also taught to finish everything on my plate, but my mom would also criticize me when I was fat :(
It was a bit of a throw away point, but long term lyme disease is a real thing. I personally have the UK variant and while it's not very understood I can vouch for their being real with physical symptoms. I've been to psychologists, doctors, infectious disease specialists and even had some relatively effective treatment. No cure, unfortunately, but treatment that's helped with a number of symptoms at the very least. What's clear though is that it's physical and real. It took a good few years to even touch on it being Lyme disease and until then it was anti-depression meds, that obviously didn't help at all, and seeing a psychologist who said they were convinced it wasn't psychosomatic.
(There's some debate as to whether it's specifically Lyme disease in a long term form, or whether it's similar to Long Covid and is actually an autoimmune reaction or something similar left behind after a viral infection. Either way, the symptoms are physical and very much real.)
Either way, just wanted to leave this comment because I honestly found it very insensitive for you to suggest that the last 10 years of disability I've experienced with this illness was just faked.
I'm not saying some Celebrities haven't faked illnesses or used real illnesses to garner sympathy and mask personal failures... but the illness itself is real and there are real victims, so please bear that in mind before doubting someone.
Really appreciate your thoughts in this video and sharing your own experience. Also, congratulations on the pregnancy, how exciting!
Kimberly Foster has a video discussing this issue, and one of her points was that because of Ariana Grande’s position as the lead in a big movie that a bunch of girls are going to go see, this is not only about Ariana Grande anymore. It’s also about how girls and teens will compare their body to hers and see her as someone to emulate. When we talk about this issue, how Ariana might personally respond or take the criticism cannot be our only consideration. I don’t know the right way to talk about this, but I know we do have to talk about it somehow.
If you watch Kimberly’s video, note that a good half of it is responding to people’s comments. The real meat of the video is in the first half.
Amazing and morbid subject. Auto Munchausen? Appreciate your personal & professional insights.
I remember a great defensive third baseman in MLB whose power production went way up with steroids. Older BB fans will know who I'm talking about. He loved the attention and said the steroid problems were worth the fame. But 50% or more were using steroids so he just kept taking more, more, more and got into a kind of death spiral of low testosterone inducing depression.. So as his connective tissue and kidneys and testicles and mental health suffered he added cocaine and heroin to the steroid use. Died at the age of 41, damaged, depressed and miserable.
Wow I didn’t expect you to make a video on Ariana Grande but I’ve seriously been thinking the same thing for months Ana!
I loveee the way you see things in our world 🫶
Congratulations :). This just makes me feel really sad for people with this disease. It just seems like your mind is being really mean to you.
Congratulations. Be careful and pay attention to your hormones. But don’t let them dictate your emotions. I’ve had my hormones fool me for no logical reason. I’ve had times where I fast and I’m OK for 3 days. I’ve had other times when my appetite is gone and the thought of food makes me nauseous. It’s been a roller coaster ride learning. Some people like me thin and others like some weight. My body and hormones don’t want to be ill or a victim. I’m used to doing it on my own. Asking for help and blabbing about feelings is useless. Psychologists cost money - and I have to talk, talk and talk.
I know metric and American measurements.
Do what’s best. So what serves you best without over analyzing. So many people eat without appreciating. Our family had the don’t waste food mindset. I’m not as fastidious about things as you are Dr. Ana. I can’t savour food anymore. I just eat for nutrition. The words you use when you speak in your inner voice are thee most important words of all! Be cognizant of being cavalier with the self dialogue. Maybe they need a hug. Even if it’s virtual
I've always had a crush on Arianna grande..I hope she's ok 💛
yah no like totally
OMG YOURE PREGNANT !!! Congratulations 🩷🩷🩷🩷
I know people can wear whatever they want, but as someone who struggled with a restrictive ED for years, it is so triggering to see A.G.'s bones so visibly. I feel that her pride in her thinness literalky is being put on display with her wardrobe choices, and it makes me feel upset because of the young girls who lool up to her and may aspire to shrink down to her size.
It would somehow feel different to me if AG dressed more conservatively and didnt display her potential ED.
13:00 This makes me feel the impulse to go see if eugenia cooney is still alive.... this is morbid, yes. 😢
So the contagious in the crew of Desperate Houswives ...
You should talk about Eugenia Cooney. The online bullying against her is insane
I like artists and care a little what goes on with them but Ariana Grande is not one of them; I do get concerned though when they get so thin, I remember back in time when Whitney Houston turned into a skeleton - because of drug use. It was scary to see her. it is always some type of big problem when people lose too much weight and it is interesting to know why,, but when they gain ppl also jump on them and complain - even more - especially nowadays with internet..When I was eating little when younger I maintained my weight mostly. May metabolism already sucked. Now, I cannot stay hungry anymore. I probably eat instead of socializing.
I think people should just stop commenting on OTHER PEOPLES bodies. Like i dont care about anyones body except my own lol
If you know it’s triggering, don’t indulge.
SHE IS PREGNANT ???? I wish I was Ana Yudin's daughter !!! ( T∀T)
Ummm... She's definitely very skinny but i think some of those pictures were edited to make her look way more skinny than she actually is and that is a horrible thing to do
You're pregnant? Congratulations!
Most likely more than half the people making little videos about her weight don’t even really care. They just want content and likes. ….on a more positive note, congratulations!!
💯
Ariana no more grande
they don’t want you to read the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki because it sets you free
"They don't want you to" lol. I don't think anyone cares
The young lady is a vegan. Do you or your commentators understand the stress and tribulations of living in a non vegan world?
Is Ariana G trying to compete with Eugenia Cooney?❤
I wonder why is it okay to tell a thin person (which Ariana has always been) to “eat a cheeseburger”, but telling an overweight person to stop eating would be considered offensive. That’s why I never believed in body positivity - you’re only allowed to be positive about your body if you’re fat, and no one can comment on it
? I hear people tell large people to stop eating or eat less, work out all the time.
People tell fat people to stop eating and exercise all the time... Just look at the fit to fat subreddit
As an overweight person, I've been told that more than I could count, both by my relatives and boyfriends, and they never saw anything wrong with it. Please don't turn this into an oppression contest, because NO MATTER the weight, women can never win and be considered enough
@@anahatabetamercetias an insult maybe. That’s not what I meant. Nobody goes around expressing concern about people who are overweight (75% of Americans) and telling them they should “eat less”
@@anya_d yes, they do. Shame goes both ways. You seem to have a bias and when someone disputes it you change the goalpost of what you're meaning. It goes both ways, both side of the criticism are wrong, body positivity also goes both ways. The reason there's a focus on fat people is because of societies abhorrent treatment of fat people vs skinny people. It's systemic. Not just a mean thing said here or there, although that is a small part that contributes to a larger issue.
🇵🇸 I am the daughter of Gaza, I ask you by God to pray for us, my Muslim brothers and sisters 🇵🇸❤؛؛؛♡♤؛؛؛؛
No thanks.
I'll keep advocating for you.
@@Voidapparatewhat the hell 😭😭
Is the set of all sets a member of itself?
Who cares?
I have no empathy for her since she's rooting for Jeffry Dhamer
Have you ever said something stupid only to regret it later. You ain't no saint and your false morals make you a classical hypocrite.
@roberttorres6552 you can be whining all day lol. I'm not here to protect the evil whether the devil is eating her from inside out or not. Plus u didn't describe how my morals make me a hypocrite. Idc about the evil thats all cuz protect them at what cost?
wanting to understand someone's thought process does not mean you want you root for them. that's literally how you prevent bad things from happening in the first place
@@jwseven77 you literly have no idea what you talking about fan boy. Do some research first.
girl what