The 18 Characteristics of Narcissists

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  • Опубліковано 27 тра 2024
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    Tim talks about the 18 Characteristics of Narcissism and some common narcissistic behaviours to look out for.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 258

  • @RippleDrop.
    @RippleDrop. Місяць тому +187

    The being nice 99% of the time is with strangers. They are predominantly abusive with people who can't escape them, like kids and spouse.

    • @lindamac45
      @lindamac45 27 днів тому +15

      absolutely. I constantly heard how wonderful and caring he was... just not at home.

    • @RippleDrop.
      @RippleDrop. 25 днів тому +4

      @@lindamac45 *exactly*

    • @julieschechter3995
      @julieschechter3995 24 дні тому +2

      Very true.

    • @harveymedia7
      @harveymedia7 21 день тому +2

      EXACTLY

    • @Odog78
      @Odog78 15 днів тому +2

      Preach

  • @jamescompany-xf6vi
    @jamescompany-xf6vi 9 днів тому +218

    Interesting video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her..

    • @coleman-zx9ne
      @coleman-zx9ne 9 днів тому +1

      its difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation, my relationship of 12 years ended, but i couldnt just let her go i did all i could to get her back, i had to seek the help of a spiritual counselor who helped me bring her back

    • @jamescompany-xf6vi
      @jamescompany-xf6vi 9 днів тому

      Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

    • @coleman-zx9ne
      @coleman-zx9ne 9 днів тому

      Her name is Shelly renee white , and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

    • @jamescompany-xf6vi
      @jamescompany-xf6vi 9 днів тому

      Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

    • @turymuri
      @turymuri 6 днів тому

      @@coleman-zx9ne That is really dangerous thing to do. You did not get same person back. She is a shell of what she used to be. This is working with Intranquil Spirit aka dead ones. Yes it can bring results very fast , but that is not genuine love or affection that is obsession. It can really backfire badly.
      Here’s the catch. If the Intranquil Spirit helps and your lover comes crawling back, your payment to the Intranquil Spirit is to assume its role. After you die, the Intranquil Spirit is free to travel to an afterlife realm while you are fated to become an Intranquil Spirit forever or until someone invokes your help with an unwilling love. (And of course, the Intranquil Spirit who once helped you is now invested in your death.)
      Wish you good luck thou!

  • @cicinomaden
    @cicinomaden Місяць тому +58

    I only get 16:
    1. Think they're better than everyone else
    2. Think they're more important than others
    3. They exaggerate their achievements, and expect you to acknowledge they're better than you
    4. They have insatiable appetite for praise, attention, admiration.
    5. Think everyone is jealous of them
    6. Their value is on their image.
    7. Arrogant
    8. They must never be wrong.
    9. Initially can act very caring, but as time goes you can see they feel entitled. Relationship is lopsided.
    10. Think rules don't apply to them.
    11. Exploitive to others. All about manipulating you to meet their needs. They play a long game, they will pretend to care to groom you and then they only get.
    12. Narcs can be the nicest people in the world 99% of the time, until they don't get what they want. There is hell to pay. (Some triggers: perceived rejection, not getting enough attention, or anything messes with their image)
    13. Jealousy issues. Get rid of friends, families, etc.
    14. Control issues
    15. Extreme sensitivities and tendency to easily hurt over the slightest things (stemming from their sense of shame)
    16. Need constant reflection/mirror

    • @Seekfind
      @Seekfind Місяць тому +3

      Sharing achievements thinking others are friends is not to put someone down.Some share because they think the other is the close friend.Then where comes the jealousy.Ok.when others donot reciprocate,I can take the other is not interested in updations and they want to be in distance.

    • @healinginjesus2112
      @healinginjesus2112 11 днів тому +1

      Thank you.

  • @jeryuen6563
    @jeryuen6563 Місяць тому +43

    Narcissus was not in love with himself, he was in love with the false image he saw in the water.
    The idea of a false self is the true idea of what a narcissist is.
    False.

    • @RippleDrop.
      @RippleDrop. Місяць тому +11

      Indeed. Narcissistic people loathe themselves behind the intense defense of grandiosity.

    • @andriyandriychuk
      @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +5

      There is no authentic personality behind narcissist. They are simulacrons.

    • @torasacramento4905
      @torasacramento4905 4 дні тому

      RIGHT! AND they rely on the reactions of OTHERS to reinforce the false personna they WISH was real. They devalue and discard others when the others "supply" doens't "work for the Narc to bolster his or her false identity anymore. They need NEW people to refresh their belief in their false self.. and it goes on and on and on

  • @anonomyss
    @anonomyss Місяць тому +127

    My parents were narcissists in different ways, and it took hitting rock bottom for me to realize that I was one too.

    • @yellowdayz1800
      @yellowdayz1800 Місяць тому

      Do you realize that to be a diagnosied narcissist - it has to border, at the least, a mental illness /handicap, minimal of severe emotional disregulation for it to be a professionally diagnosed NPD. Or you are just a run of the mill "narcissist"..... And your parents. Some, a true narcissist, are downright sociopathic and or pschopathic in how they like to be cruel to people and truly get off on it, most of them, for as long as life will allow them. Till most of them, in their older age, no one is around them or a few more victims they manage to drag into their web.😮

    • @yellowdayz1800
      @yellowdayz1800 Місяць тому

      Do you realize that to be a diagnosied narcissist - it has to border, at the least, a mental illness /handicap, minimal of severe emotional disregulation for it to be a professionally diagnosed NPD. Or you are just a run of the mill "narcissist"..... And your parents. Some, a true narcissist, are downright sociopathic and or pschopathic in how they like to be cruel to people and truly get off on it, most of them, for as long as life will allow them. Till most of them, in their older age, no one is around them or a few more victims they manage to drag into their web.😮

    • @yellowdayz1800
      @yellowdayz1800 Місяць тому

      @@icxcnika2 you folks don't get it..... A true narcissist is a pschopath

    • @TinaDougherty
      @TinaDougherty Місяць тому +4

      I agree. It would be extremely rare at least.

    • @laurem1274
      @laurem1274 Місяць тому +11

      It must be hard to become aware of this.

  • @jeffm8206
    @jeffm8206 15 днів тому +24

    Spot on Tim. And bingo on the they are never wrong and have no empathy. IMO, the vulnerable or covert narcissist is the most dangerous to deal with.

  • @FOX007-um1wr
    @FOX007-um1wr Місяць тому +62

    This is my late husband and my mother. My mother outright attacked me physically resulting permeant injury, which wasn't the first time, after her and my doctor got into it. I couldn't be around my mother, she wanted to kill me. I had been in fear all of my life around her. My father and two different doctors told me I had no choice be to cut my mother off.
    Her psychiatrist told me it was very dangerous for me to be around my mother, yet most everyone loved her, because she was so kind and had a big heart. None of these people knew who she was behind closed doors leaving me no where to turn, nobody to talk to. She would NEVER accept any responsibility for any thing she did to hurt people. Never!

    • @natural3362
      @natural3362 Місяць тому +8

      Go no contact break free

    • @jasonmuise7496
      @jasonmuise7496 5 днів тому +1

      I just sent my mother a good bye txt. Said 51 yrs old and can't be a part of it any more. I seek peace and joy. I must move on as hard as that is. My sister did the same a few yrs ago. Sad really.

  • @mariahwilliams5333
    @mariahwilliams5333 21 день тому +43

    What about stonewalling, gaslighting and blame shifting?

    • @qbik911
      @qbik911 7 днів тому

      Exactly. As INFJ he just describing my typical behavior while i am literally afraid to ask people for anything because of how similar we are to Narcs on surface while dont do the dark deeds.

  • @leajianlanyu1581
    @leajianlanyu1581 Місяць тому +14

    So true, this is exactly my experience of living with my ex. for 15 years! Blaming, calling me names, belittling and insulting me so that he got what he wanted, physical assaults, cheating and he said it was my fault, Calling me selfish and ugly, gold digger old bag, pouring coffee into my handbag, throwing my computer and breaking the screen, throwing my jewellery into a dust bin, blaming me that i was not there when he wanted kill himself several times, Saying to me “everyone says that you are cold!” “You never invite me to your club”, “you are so selfish”. Everything triggers him to blame me and to call me selfish, mean and send me 🤮 emojis. He calls me “having the victim mindset”. And he has found himself another attention and energy supply within 1 year. Thank you Tim for all your important work on this matter and this video is so spot on! 🙏🏻🙏🏻

    • @digoldstone8263
      @digoldstone8263 23 дні тому +1

      Same story. 16 yrs married. 8 months after I stopped feeding his supply he finds someone else.

  • @andriyandriychuk
    @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +15

    Perceived rejection and not getting attention is HUGE triggers.

    • @Pascale5625
      @Pascale5625 12 днів тому +1

      And criticism. They always need to be right or else.... Narc rage.

  • @andriyandriychuk
    @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +14

    Narcissist is one part a child never fully separated and never able to individuate and other part is grandiose simulacron of a person constructed to manipulate and destroy others in an attempt for another part (child) to separate through other people which is only possible by destroying personality of others.

  • @meangirlhockey2812
    @meangirlhockey2812 15 днів тому +48

    Always remember, it's not a disorder, it's a DECISION!

    • @nidaladil4150
      @nidaladil4150 11 днів тому

      It's a disorder

    • @joons3374
      @joons3374 8 днів тому +1

      Bullshit

    • @joons3374
      @joons3374 8 днів тому +1

      How dare you even day that

    • @IndrasChildDeepAsleep
      @IndrasChildDeepAsleep 7 днів тому

      Wow that's wrong. Sure decisions are made, lots of them, but the ones that comprise NPD behavior, are, unsurprisingly, part of NPD.

    • @Jessicahurst1
      @Jessicahurst1 6 днів тому

      Disagree.

  • @zendarawlings2237
    @zendarawlings2237 Місяць тому +40

    18 for 18. I wish I had known what a narcissist was before I got married, or even what manipulation was.

    • @tonyd.9156
      @tonyd.9156 16 днів тому +3

      Yep, the truth will set you free. Now, focus on healing your trauma.

    • @jeffm8206
      @jeffm8206 15 днів тому +2

      Yep, same here, now it's too late for me in so many ways.

  • @darrellbennett8027
    @darrellbennett8027 11 днів тому +3

    You should get an award for how spot on you are with your description of the narcissist!!!

  • @user-sg6sv9oi6i
    @user-sg6sv9oi6i 13 днів тому +6

    Shame is the key. Tim, you mentioned this, as did a psychologist on another UA-cam video had explained the same causal factors of narcissists' development.
    Thank you. This is very important information. Awesome job 💯

  • @lundsweden
    @lundsweden 13 днів тому +9

    I have bipolar traits (not enough to be diagnosed but have a sub clinical version).
    When I'm in a near- manic state I become more narcissistic than usual. It's usually Just after I've been really depressed.
    My doctor calls this a "manic defense against depression". This is not real narcissism, of course. I don't want to put anyone down, and really my (temporarily) inflated view of myself is enough "fuel" for me.
    I guess what I'm suggesting is that being narcissistic is not the same thing as being a narcissist (as in NPD).

    • @IndrasChildDeepAsleep
      @IndrasChildDeepAsleep 7 днів тому

      This. I have temporary narc traits, they come and go, and leave me feeling really guilty and/or ashamed. I am told it's part of my trauma responses but believe it might be something else as well.

  • @Lilmommabear4
    @Lilmommabear4 20 днів тому +5

    SO Spot on Tim!!!! Everything you mentioned in this video is exactly what I dealt with for 13-14 years and it affected me mentally and emotionally and I had to leave!! It was too much for me and extremely exhausting!! 😞😔

  • @artluvr6170
    @artluvr6170 Місяць тому +27

    As soon as they realize that you have figured them out, it’s over. They will discard you like yesterday’s trash. You caused them a narcissistic wound - a mortal wound.

    • @Yo-yo-dt5ze
      @Yo-yo-dt5ze 23 дні тому +4

      Yup I figured it out with my bf of 5 yrs he was a narc when he realized it he ghosted me and I haven’t heard from him since

  • @honorablehugh
    @honorablehugh Місяць тому +24

    This'll be the video and video title that makes this channel go viral

  • @howarddavies782
    @howarddavies782 6 днів тому

    Cracking video, it isn't until you hear other people talking about it that you realise that others genuinely understand what you are going through and that you are not alone.

  • @sarahjmount9221
    @sarahjmount9221 Місяць тому +5

    Right on, Tim. You described the personality disorder perfectly. Thank you for sharing your wisdom so freely. I needed to be reminded today, especially. I’m grateful to you for all you teach in your videos. It has helped me heal, become aware of others, and most importantly self-aware. Most of my family were narcissists. I went no contact with them finally when I started my recovery process after I discovered what complex trauma was; and that was what was wrong with me. Funny, though I’m still stuck in a relationship with a narcissistic man whom I’ve been living with for the past 10.5 yrs. I’m still working around it, though and getting better. I’ve learned to detach and have a plan in motion to get out.

  • @jsmith7240
    @jsmith7240 Місяць тому +9

    Yep, Tim nailed that one too. Thanks Tim for your work.

  • @SheenaRea
    @SheenaRea 15 днів тому +4

    My friend you summed this up perfectly. 1000% correct.

  • @LOVEISTRUTH300
    @LOVEISTRUTH300 Місяць тому +3

    I understand this. Thank you again for another great video Tim Fletcher💖💖💖

  • @feverandfret
    @feverandfret Місяць тому +44

    Narcissism also works in the negative, meaning, "No one said hello to me today. Everyone must hate me!"

    • @i.ehrenfest349
      @i.ehrenfest349 Місяць тому +9

      Wellllll….that’s insecurity, and while it can be narcissistic insecurity, it absolutely doesn’t have to be.

    • @moringagreen6925
      @moringagreen6925 Місяць тому +3

      That's cognitive distortion.

    • @davidrosen3736
      @davidrosen3736 8 днів тому +1

      Or paranoid disorder: such people always interpret everything negative

  • @user-sg6sv9oi6i
    @user-sg6sv9oi6i 13 днів тому +2

    Tim, you are on target 🎯 Thank you for sharing your knowledge with all of us. ❤️

  • @oliverhill113
    @oliverhill113 Місяць тому +4

    Brilliantly explained I think. Many thanks.

  • @braedenmckean375
    @braedenmckean375 22 дні тому +8

    I had a psychotic breakdown in my senior year of highschool about a year ago where I was showing some of these symptoms to some very good people who didn't deserve it. But since I've recovered, I've felt so guilty about how I behaved when I was sick. Part of me wants to reach out and apologize and let them know im doing ok, but the other part of me thinks the best gift I could give them would be to just let the past rest and move on and live my life, and acknowledge that maybe the damage I caused is too much to be reconciled and it would only cause them more pain to hear from me again. I dont know... but im encouraged that given i feel literally awful most days about how i acted during that time, and i still try to hold myself accountable that i dont think im a narcassist 😅 so thats good?!

    • @francestaylor9156
      @francestaylor9156 19 днів тому +5

      You could always write a letter. That way they can read it on their own time. It gives them the respect for their own space but also that you want to apologize for what you've done to them. As long as you don't expect anything in return, I think that means you're not acting like a narc.

  • @andriyandriychuk
    @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +4

    Best lectures on trauma.

  • @lauralynnmcculloch1186
    @lauralynnmcculloch1186 25 днів тому +14

    The nicer I am to my narcissist boyfriend the crueler he becomes. He will literally call me a whole, bxtch etc in my vehicle and get out and treat a stranger like gold.

    • @jennacallahan85
      @jennacallahan85 13 днів тому +7

      Please get away safely before it gets worse. Trust me I wish I would have.

  • @anne467
    @anne467 7 днів тому

    Great video thanks for sharing. He has every single one.

  • @lblincoe2094
    @lblincoe2094 Місяць тому +39

    I wish more sources included the covert/ vulnerable adaptation in their information. Some of these traits apply to both (have to be right, entitlement, no empathy, exploitative, double standards, for instance) but some are a direct contradiction.
    For example, a covert DOES think they're special and unique, but it's not in the context of their merit or being especially skilled or worthy or valuable, it's in the context of their misfortune and suffering; no one has ever suffered as they have suffered, no one will ever be as big of a victim as they have been, they are a special and unique kind of disadvantaged. A covert will specifically NOT believe they are awesome and perfect and godlike, instead they're the MOST incompetent and underprivileged and destitute and that's not fair.
    A grandiose narcissist thinks they deserve anything they want just because their inherent worth is priceless and owed deference and they're better than everyone, the covert narcissist, however, thinks they actually deserve everything because they're so worthLESS and so underprivileged and they've been SO deprived that they're owed recompense for all the wrongs they've suffered. They should never have to suffer a single frustration or ever have a single desire unfulfilled as a sense of justice to them, they are OWED privilege to make up for their underprivileged life and misery.
    Because life is supposed to be fair and equal for everyone, right? That's what they see; we were all given an even playing field, with the same advantage and privilege, and they were forced to start life at a deficit. We all were given the same opportunities and chances in their mind, and they've been left out. No one is entitled to have good fortune or luck, if they haven't also had the same luck and good fortune, and they were given a bum deal by the lottery of their birth, so now the world owes it to them to make up for that previous injustice.
    They are less than and worthless, but WE are responsible for that by daring NOT to be as weak and powerless as they are and for the offense of rubbing our advantage in their faces by way of our successes and happiness. We dared to commit the crime of being better than them and then we insulted them by refusing to acknowledge the injustice that had been done to them, now they are owed anything and everything they want and we are all sentenced to serve their interests at the sacrifice of our own.
    This is a VERY different attitude from the grandiose. They're both self absorbed and believe they deserve they deserve a place above all else, but for very different reasons

    • @yellowdayz1800
      @yellowdayz1800 Місяць тому

      No...... Not necessarily!!! Stop labeling.. We need to stop this. That is YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH A NARC. NARCISSIST ARE DIFFERENT IN HOW THEY GET CRUEL TO OTHERS..THIS IS NOT NOT THE NORMAL SELFISH WAYS OF A HUMAN. A TRUE NARC GETS CRUEL! AND THEY ARE AS DIFFERENT AS THEIR FINGERPRINTS. ONE GLOVE DOES NOT FIT ALL. THEY HAVE SIMULAR THINGS THEY DO... BUT THTAS IT!! DON'T LABEL ANYONE UNLESS THEY HAVE A PROFESSIONAL DIAGNOSIS! THIS US CRITICAL.
      COVERT MALIGNANT NARCISSIST ARE ABSOLUTELY CRUEL TO PEOPLE... I SLY WAYS THAT MOST OF THEIR VICTIMS WILL NOT KNOW ABOUT FOR YEARS. ALL YOU PEOPLE CLAIMING THAT THIS AND THAT IS A NARCISSIST... HALF OF YOU ARE JUST DEALING WITH A NORMAL SELFISH HUMAN BEING..MORE IS MOST LIKELY.
      IF THE PERSON YOU CLAIM TO BE A NARCISSIST.... ISN'T AS CRUEL AS HELL BEHIND CLOSED DOORS.. FOR A 100% SURE... DON'T ASSUME YOUR SUSPECT IS EVIL. BE VERY CAREFUL.
      SAID WITH ALL DUE RESPECT AND CAPD FOR URGENCY. I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT YOUR EXPLANATION OF COVERT IS NOT CORRECT... THEY ARE INSEDIOUS HELLIONS THAT ARE CRUELER THAN DAMN HELL.

    • @TinaDougherty
      @TinaDougherty Місяць тому

      Tim's Playlists go way back and are extensive to say the least, so you may find what you're looking for there.

    • @frizzyrascal1493
      @frizzyrascal1493 Місяць тому

      Covert Narcissism is a huge spectrum, but they all share at least five of the 9 traits that are needed to be diagnosed with narcissism.

    • @Stellared78
      @Stellared78 17 днів тому

      So true!

    • @TallGlass-fh8qf
      @TallGlass-fh8qf 15 днів тому +1

      This is always my issue with how NPD is taught. It rarely steps outside of the conventional and overt type of narcissist, even though there are many different manifestations of this personality disorder. I also dislike how the mainstream teachings tend to not explain it ultimately comes down to these behaviors being pathological, not just something you did for a short period of time or in a certain situation.
      The narc in my life is a covert narcissist that has crossover of vulnerable and antagonistic traits. So she is always in competition with you, because she cannot determine herself worthy without a finish line reflecting it (i.e. no ability to self-reflect). She is also always executing this behind a sweetheart, angelic demeanor that the public thinks is her…but only I know it is not. Unlike the overt, grandiose narc she will never explicitly state or bodily express anything…only her fleeting facial expressions and “I’m studying you” eyes give her away. So if one does not know what to look for, they will never notice she is a horrible person…

  • @OYensen
    @OYensen Місяць тому +10

    Spot on.

  • @IRISHWINECOOP
    @IRISHWINECOOP Місяць тому +2

    spot on Tim.

  • @lauralynnmcculloch1186
    @lauralynnmcculloch1186 25 днів тому +1

    This is excellent!!!

  • @eleanam4835
    @eleanam4835 10 днів тому

    This is one of the best summaries of a narcissist👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

  • @user-rt1cs8gp1o
    @user-rt1cs8gp1o 11 днів тому

    You have explained a person a I know perfectly.

  • @Relayzy1
    @Relayzy1 Місяць тому +11

    There's never 50/50 in any relationship...

    • @i.ehrenfest349
      @i.ehrenfest349 Місяць тому +3

      Well, some relationships come pretty close.

    • @jonathanmun4180
      @jonathanmun4180 Місяць тому +2

      You will find yours someday.. sorry.

    • @RippleDrop.
      @RippleDrop. Місяць тому +1

      No. It's only slave/master relationship. They take either side depending on the situation.

  • @gwendolynwehage6336
    @gwendolynwehage6336 16 днів тому +1

    This is all true! I have lived with and around narcissists all my life.

  • @jennifergaughan7604
    @jennifergaughan7604 9 днів тому

    Amen. I can't thank you enough. 100%

  • @lindamac45
    @lindamac45 27 днів тому

    Spot on!!!!

  • @dennisdiede
    @dennisdiede 28 днів тому +13

    Narcissism is "ME ONLY". Selfish is Me First, You second. Big difference

    • @andriyandriychuk
      @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +3

      They deal with false snapshot of other people. They don't see others as they are but how others should be and behave towards them. They don't understand why others don't treat them like they deserved to be treated. So everything is others fault.

  • @user-cb7cz3ty5p
    @user-cb7cz3ty5p 15 днів тому +1

    Truth is we have narcissism in different levels ... So there is no one person with no narcisistic traits at all... It is how far we go for our own gains self admiring vs other people
    So we naturally need to have that self love and go after our own achievements but narcisism goes to the extreme in deluting oneself into thinking that a person is better than anyone else and is entitled to use people to get whatever they want and generally it is validation admiration congratulations constantly

  • @lynnschaeferle-zh4go
    @lynnschaeferle-zh4go 12 днів тому +1

    It’s not exactly a decision when they are choosing cruelty for entertainment. We did fairly okay until the kids left home; they provided enough worship. Then I was boring and not 20 anymore. He was a professional covert manipulator and his goal was to be mean. At the beginning he was the nicest humble guy. He ended up a sadist who destroyed my life.

  • @delicatesoundasmr
    @delicatesoundasmr Місяць тому +3

    Please talk about counterdependence! It's so hard to find info on because everyone only ever discusses codependence.

  • @mariannekoroleva6495
    @mariannekoroleva6495 9 днів тому

    YES, in the language of the pride "I care really for somebody" calls "I am crapping in a sh*t" (=> case Lucy Fletscher)... Thank You!!:))!!

  • @user-kv9gs8kb6m
    @user-kv9gs8kb6m 11 днів тому +1

    Half of those 18 traits would qualify someone as a NPD Narcissist.
    However, almost every person you've ever met has at least one or two narcissistic traits. Therefore be aware of the label of "Narcissist" it's a generalized overused term that everyone is throwing around nowadays.
    Just because you recognize a trait in someone, doesn't necessarily qualify them as having NPD, or are a sociopath, psychopath, Narcopath, or suffering from severe psychopathy issues, it could be a number of other things. They could also be a scapegoat victim of a Severely NPD Narcissist who has learned how to recognize these traits in others and choose to not associate with people displaying these traits, whether or not they are actually a full blown NPD Narcissist or not
    Only real true qualified psychologists can actually determine if your dealing with a problematic NPD Narcissist individual or you have just identified some traits in someone that are part of their personality. Narcissism is a trendy key word being dropped on social media platforms for likes. Best thing is to get educated and understand that almost everyone you will ever interact with display some sort of Narcissistic traits. It's the psychological manipulative individuals that suffer from NPD, or worse, sociopaths, psychopaths and a whole lot of DSM definitions that you really need to watch out for.

  • @DJ-yj1vg
    @DJ-yj1vg 13 днів тому

    This just described my sister in law.

  • @pohkeee
    @pohkeee Місяць тому +13

    The describes most people I’ve ever known…and 98% of the public nowadays…🥴 currently, labeling countless people with it also seems to be a very popular pastime on social media

    • @IndrasChildDeepAsleep
      @IndrasChildDeepAsleep 7 днів тому

      I've only met a handful of people that have most of these qualities, and man did most of them wreck my life

  • @M_butterfly788.-tf8bd
    @M_butterfly788.-tf8bd 12 днів тому +1

    I don't think I'm special or unique in the sense that I am better than others or smarter or can only be understood by prestige people. I don't get it though my whole life my mother and others used to attack me and say “you think you’re SO special!!!” in a very nasty tearing-me-down mean and emotionally and mentally abusive way and I never even did or said anything wrong to warrant that. And then rarely I would hear someone in church lovingly say “you are special.” “you are unique” “you were created on purpose.” I would actually begin to barely feel my worth. and now here in this video I'm being told thinking or saying that I’m special and unique is narcissistic.

    • @sunshinesunflowerz1647
      @sunshinesunflowerz1647 10 днів тому

      There's nothing wrong with having a good relationship with one's own self-love. I mean that's inevitably what therapy is doing, right?

  • @joeycfitc2833
    @joeycfitc2833 29 днів тому +4

    Like when Brad got off the plane. Caused a narc injury. Now his kids no longer carry his name. Be careful who you marry. Narcissists are disgusting to the bone. This video is spot on.
    I also haven’t seen my kids in 4 years since I left my narc.

  • @user-hx4cz8do9e
    @user-hx4cz8do9e 10 днів тому

    Sir you are spot-on every point ! Well done
    But pls realise , there are women like this not only men. Mine is a full blown NPD ‘ beautiful ‘ WOMAN master at ALL 18 points you stated , having various supply. Pls put it out there
    Thank you

  • @user-hx4cz8do9e
    @user-hx4cz8do9e 10 днів тому

    Correct sir

  • @shockjay
    @shockjay 15 днів тому +1

    "Only the right people understand my greatness" is code for "nobody but God understands my greatness"

    • @gadoll11
      @gadoll11 13 днів тому +1

      Correction. Not even God understands them.

  • @Dawnarow
    @Dawnarow 10 днів тому +1

    It's all defense mechanisms because they are "confused" (halted development during childhood... sadly, these individuals were really attractive at some point / might still be......... and they'll die alone or trapping someone whom thinks they're hurt [most of em are psychopathologically unable to live their own emotions... not that they have none, but these are limited to faking joy and being hurt). I hope this helps someone. Sadly, Society is not equipped for this nightmarish stance they have against everyone.

  • @turymuri
    @turymuri 6 днів тому

    Love of my life left me two months ago.Two years of relationship ended so abruptly without any signs that it is going that way. She left me while i was at work. I kissed her in the morning for a goodbye as i always do, said see you baby in the evening. She said mhm and i went to work. Then out of sudden i got msg from her she is breaking up with me and that she is moving out of city .I never saw it coming. Refusing to give me closure. It hurts like hell getting no closure , funny thing she want no contact and i i want is closure which i will never get. My mind is in a bad state also my body but im getting better after two months,

  • @gretenaaden7613
    @gretenaaden7613 День тому

    They lie, lie and lie...have no consincessness... no regrets

  • @dsheppard8492
    @dsheppard8492 18 днів тому

    Some people are smarter, more capable and even better than ( many ) other people,,, just not everyone.

  • @jrsf222
    @jrsf222 Місяць тому +27

    Gaslighters, Liars, keep copies and pictures

    •  Місяць тому +2

      ..or find out the hard way.. yeah

    • @andriyandriychuk
      @andriyandriychuk 17 днів тому +2

      100%

  • @HereIGoo
    @HereIGoo 9 днів тому +1

    There’s levels to this game and you low effort people already look tired. Just because you can’t level up doesn’t mean we aren’t better than you. Just sit back and watch….

  • @felicitydowning7970
    @felicitydowning7970 8 днів тому

    What are the odds, I have come into contact with two in one year. My neighbour is evil!!! Thanks. ❤

  • @semperdecorus37
    @semperdecorus37 12 днів тому +1

    You guys must watch Dr Sam Vaknin who is an expert in this field. His work is insane!

  • @niclas889
    @niclas889 4 дні тому

    its not describing the neglectful, avoidant narcissist

  • @MJ-qb5ph
    @MJ-qb5ph 7 днів тому

    Total lack of empathy and curiousity are dead give always of the covert

  • @mariahwilliams5333
    @mariahwilliams5333 21 день тому +1

    What if they dont fit the dsm but they love bomb, gaslight and stonewall?? And they want to go to couples counseling and read books on narcissism?

  • @jasonmuise7496
    @jasonmuise7496 5 днів тому

    At 8:18 you mention the long game. It sounds like i'm the narcissist i thought we took time to build a relationship as friends ? I'm confused. I do the tests and score low so ?? I am male first born but the runt of the community. I figure i have lots of coping issues.

  • @nealwailing3870
    @nealwailing3870 12 днів тому

    'What time is it?' 'How, fucking dare you, you bastard!'

  • @AnPTsRoom7
    @AnPTsRoom7 Місяць тому +5

    Sir, do you provide any counseling services ?

    • @susannluckmann7705
      @susannluckmann7705 Місяць тому

      He does. Check the infobox, get well soon and good luck.

  • @donnamogavero9212
    @donnamogavero9212 13 днів тому

    Omg he has just described my wife perfectly. I admit I get immediately defensive and it's off to the races ugh

  • @prancey227
    @prancey227 Місяць тому +6

    What is the opposite of narcissism? Like when you feel like you know less than most people, or like you're a dumber person than most people?

    • @sarahw7616
      @sarahw7616 Місяць тому +11

      That would be victims of narcissists

    • @Heritagepostfarms
      @Heritagepostfarms Місяць тому +8

      Low self esteem?

    • @anonomyss
      @anonomyss Місяць тому +7

      Imposter syndrome if you really arent as bad as you think

    • @i.ehrenfest349
      @i.ehrenfest349 Місяць тому +1

      It can actually be a part of narcissism, because the self esteem of narcissists can fluctuate wildly. Or any of the possibilities the commenters above have mentioned.

    • @prancey227
      @prancey227 Місяць тому

      @@i.ehrenfest349 it can be narcissism if the symptoms are the exact opposite of narcissism?

  • @michendrennaicker7100
    @michendrennaicker7100 9 днів тому

    I feel like this isn't a black and white kind of thing, nobody is all good or all bad. It's kinda like that Chinese symbol of yin yang. It's just different shades of Grey on a spectrum.
    People can't be all good all the time or all bad but we fall somewhere on that spectrum. I mean I know that I don't get what I want the large majority of the time and I accept it, but once in a while it may upset me and I will voice it when I believe something or someone is not being unfair in my judgment and although it may be a subjective point of view, we can try to view it as objectively as possible.
    I mean I had an ex who would call me a failure and loser when we would argue but put me on a treat me like gold when things were good. I still would not say she was a narcissist, because I understand people get upset and say things,even if those things hurt, it's up to you as a person to either use it grow or learn,and people also change, if their environment improves and you lead by example, people do change.
    I mean, if you hit a dog everyday since it was born, it will bite the next kind hand that's trying to feed it,point is, it's not up to you to judge people because you may hardly know what has lead them to be how they are,instead decide if you are willing to help them grow and if they are willing to try, or see yourself out.
    Don't go around and label people to be narcissistic because we All display some traits at different times based on our own personal growth, the fact that one may do this to another is in of itself something narcissistic.
    I think as a society, we point the finger at others way too much, if you grow as a person, you can't be easily manipulated and your growth as a person rubs of on those around.
    And yes I know this guy says you gotta have atleast half of the traits to yourself be considered one,but at certain times I myself have displayed some of these things and for the vast majority, I haven't.
    So have my friends and family.
    My message is simple so I apologize for the banter.
    Look within before you look out, if you are strong, it doesn't matter what the world can do to you, but what you can do for the world,and don't be hard on yourself for not being perfect, we're all just trying to figure this thing called life, before it ends🤙🏼

  • @nealwailing3870
    @nealwailing3870 12 днів тому

    I have never known anyone who is any different...

  • @xooq_
    @xooq_ Місяць тому +2

    What are the 18 things

  • @grantaugustyniak6667
    @grantaugustyniak6667 17 днів тому

    🎯

  • @beatsbyjoeezy1440
    @beatsbyjoeezy1440 Місяць тому +7

    Instead of my gf learning not to get triggered by her own traumas, she expects me to not trigger them for her.

    • @TinaDougherty
      @TinaDougherty Місяць тому +3

      My dad frequently says to me, "why do you always do this to me!?!" as if someone else could possibly force him to become angry. He simply can not see that his anger is his own, so now we speak only sporadic pleasantries via text messages. It hurts to feel that his love was only conditional, as he clearly can not tolerate the fact that I have opinions that differ from his.

    • @RippleDrop.
      @RippleDrop. Місяць тому

      People can't help very easily to not get triggered. You might be able to control your behavior somewhat but not being triggered

    • @palmtrees2420
      @palmtrees2420 22 дні тому

      Don’t fucking marry her bro, please do yourself a huge favor and leave now before its too late.

    • @TallGlass-fh8qf
      @TallGlass-fh8qf 15 днів тому

      @@RippleDrop. That’s what he is saying, though. That she should focus on controlling her reactions and responses to her triggers, not essentially asking him to be preoccupied with managing her regulation. He is being instructed to walk on eggshells in “the name of love.”

  • @MsMol226
    @MsMol226 14 днів тому

    Lmao my husband to a T 😅😅

  • @obsidianwraith3982
    @obsidianwraith3982 10 днів тому

    This guy gave a great lecture as a grand overview & summary on the nature, but was total shit at numbering these out for those of us trying to take notes 1-18

  • @elainehiggins713
    @elainehiggins713 Місяць тому +10

    I’ve read comments by people who swear their mother was a narcissist, so was their father, all their siblings and their three exes. Okay.

    • @anonomyss
      @anonomyss Місяць тому +6

      And they are the only exception

    • @ZackWilliams_TheProducer
      @ZackWilliams_TheProducer Місяць тому +9

      It's a really really toxic trend. EVERY girl's ex is a "narcissist". What a convenient way to not take a look at yourself and your own flaws. A very relevant quote from the Bible "Why do you look at the splinter in your brother's eye, but ignore the plank in yours?"

    • @nmnteamdknn8405
      @nmnteamdknn8405 Місяць тому

      @@anonomyssmy own child calls me narcissistic, but that start at 18. Stayed about 2 years working, not paying any bill, not doing chores, coming home late… but I am the one who is narcissist… I think it’s the opposite

    • @anonomyss
      @anonomyss Місяць тому +2

      @@nmnteamdknn8405 You can both be narcissists, it's not mutually exclusive especially in a parent-child relationship. Not saying you are since idk you, but just pointing out that you both very well can be.

    • @stickeroonie
      @stickeroonie 19 днів тому +1

      It's getting ridiculous almost everyone is now a narcissist

  • @pulidobl
    @pulidobl Місяць тому

    💯

  • @rudolfsykora3505
    @rudolfsykora3505 22 дні тому

    How some people treat those who can do nothing for them..

  • @floaretudorache9287
    @floaretudorache9287 8 днів тому

    OMG my husband 200 percent
    Evil people

  • @miamicatdull
    @miamicatdull Місяць тому +1

    My soon to be ex-husband in a nutshell. He went as far as beating me and choking me up to control me.

  • @dennisdiede
    @dennisdiede 28 днів тому +2

    Narcissists can become violent IF they cannot be validated by someone else.

  • @billyb4790
    @billyb4790 13 днів тому

    It’s always “he” when talking about narcissists.
    I guess because when women do these things we give them a pass and simply expect better of men.

    • @jennacallahan85
      @jennacallahan85 13 днів тому

      Narcissists usually are men, women usually are more bpd. It’s the statistics.

  • @jordansjournal3077
    @jordansjournal3077 Місяць тому +4

    Narcissism is on a spectrum. We can’t say most people fit into or close to the DSM category, but yes, in our culture narcissism or selfishness has been on the rise. Why?
    A - People no longer believe in God, on average. When there’s no God, everyone does what’s right for themself. That’s the simple truth of what’s happened in the world and particularly in the West. And believing in God isn’t just for the uneducated. Do the research. The more advanced education you hold, the more likely you’ll realize it points to God.

  • @DNPMSW
    @DNPMSW 11 днів тому

    My Ex-Wife

  • @brians7901
    @brians7901 24 дні тому +1

    Brendan Schaub is a classic narcissist

  • @rachelc23
    @rachelc23 26 днів тому +1

    Yes no depth completely shallow and superficial ... totally empty. Sad.

  • @michellehatton3949
    @michellehatton3949 Місяць тому

    Are You telling me that You are a narcissist, Cowboy???

    • @TinaDougherty
      @TinaDougherty Місяць тому

      Of course he is, because *you* always have to be right, right 😉

  • @theraven1369
    @theraven1369 18 днів тому +1

    Hating on narcisistic personality disorder is not helping break down stigmatism, you can have narcisistic personality disorder without being a morally selfish person... Why bring up the DSM-5 if your not going to read it and misconstrue its true meaning??

  • @theartzscientist8012
    @theartzscientist8012 14 днів тому

    This guy is a narcissist. This isn’t true. There are many who are better people then others in their actions.

  • @lutdesimpelaere2947
    @lutdesimpelaere2947 23 дні тому +9

    This is Trump to a T

    • @Marc-io8qm
      @Marc-io8qm 17 днів тому +5

      Obama too

    • @Cassie-pt7mt
      @Cassie-pt7mt 15 днів тому

      Trump has never changed. He was the same guy when he was petted and praised by the sycophantic left.
      He didn't change.
      What changed was that the left will dispose of and destroy anyone and everyone who doesn't fall in line with their group think.
      And, arent Bill, Hillary, Obama, Michelle and Biden narcissists, too?
      Especially Obama and Hillary.
      Have you ever really looked at the death stares Obama would give to a reporter if they dared ask him a question that he didn't like? Holy Crap, he had the fox reporter's parent's telephone tapped.
      You are deluding yourself if you believe only one side is evil.
      And....
      Did you know that one of the first things that Trump did after purchasing Mar-a-Lago was to desegregate it?
      Before Trump owned Mar-a-Lago, no Blacks, Jews or women could play there.
      Did you know that Trump was given an award at Ellis Island, alongside Rosa Parks and Mohammed Ali, for his tremendous contributions to Under-served communities?
      Did you know that when Wollman Rink was in desperate need of repairs and Trump found out how much NYC was going to pay for those repairs, he told them that he could do it for 1/2 the price and in 1/2 the time. And he did. THEN HE DONATED IT TO THE CITY!!!
      Did you know that Trump donated all but $1.00 of his Presidential salary all 4 years???
      He gave up his businesses and worked for free as President.
      (I wonder how much of their salary the C's, Os, and Bs give? What a joke. They are takers. They don't give.)
      Did you know that long before Trump was President, he was driving in a car that had car trouble. A stranger pulled over to lend assistance. Trump asked him how he could repay him. The guy said that Trump could send the guy's wife some flowers. The flowers arrived...along with the man's PAID OFF MORTGAGE!!!!!
      Trump paid off a stranger's mortgage, simply because he helped him, as a thank you!
      Hey, did you know who was at Trump's wedding? Yep, Blue Dress and Bengazi. The left were sycophantic suckups to him, UNTIL he wanted to drain the cesspool Swamp of DC.
      You are a fool to have believed the leftist media.
      This quote comes to mind when I think of the left's crippling grip on media, academia and the narrative.
      "It didn't start with gas chambers.
      It started with one party controlling the media, controlling the message, deciding what truth was, censoring speech and silencing the opposition.
      It started with one party dividing citizens into "us" and "them" and then calling on their supporters to harass "them."
      It started when good people turned a blind eye and let it happen."
      Anonymous
      Which one are you, an "us," a "them," or a "good person"?

  • @doprisi
    @doprisi Місяць тому +7

    If only Donald Trump saw a therapist once..and was smart enough to understand this
    Edit: Sorry, I thought I would not offend anyone watching these videos. If you like to be objective for a few minutes, try to evaluate these psychological traits with the behavior of former US president Donald Trump.

    • @ChainShrine
      @ChainShrine Місяць тому +3

      If he went to therapy it would only be to seek pity and justify his victimhood. Like Tony Soprano

    • @nmnteamdknn8405
      @nmnteamdknn8405 Місяць тому +2

      Join him too

    • @anonomyss
      @anonomyss Місяць тому

      Homie is a straight sociopath

    • @anonomyss
      @anonomyss Місяць тому +3

      @@melissabodily3675 "Small loan of a million dollars" he was born into power and money.

    • @slimyspawntv
      @slimyspawntv Місяць тому +10

      The incessant hate for Donald trump is sad at this point

  • @yohizzle14
    @yohizzle14 Місяць тому +8

    It's OK to be white ❤❤❤