I ripped a page out of my mother’s bible back in the 90s, it’s 2024 going into 25 & she still doesn’t know, that’s how much she has read the Bible in the intervening years
The Bible is huge, even someone who reads it regularly might not notice a single page missing unless it was a part that they happened to read frequently. How can you even be sure that she hasn't noticed? There's no way you could ask her about it without revealing what you did, is that something she would just randomly mention?
@@mikean7074 because the 1 Bible in the house is still under the bed in my old room in the same place it was when I left it she hasn't bothered to find it let alone read it, I don't think Jesus would be particularly pleased with such neglect of his supposed divine words
So three nuns go to heaven, and St. Peter says "We're pretty full up, so you have to answer a Bible study question to get in. But you ladies were nuns, so I'm sure this will be simple for you." The first nun steps up, and St Peter asks "Who was the first man?" And she says "Adam", and so he lets her in. The second nun steps up, and he asks "Who was the first woman?" And she says "Eve", and in she goes. Then the third nun steps forth, and St. Peter asks "What was the first thing Eve said to Adam?" Now the third nun was pretty well stumped. She didn't remember anywhere in the Bible where that came up, and she says "Boy that's a hard one." And in she went...
One thing I've heard from Christians when I tell them something ugly from the bible is, "Where did you find that?" They should be telling ME! Another is, "The bible does NOT say that! You must be reading THE DARK BIBLE!" Worst of all, in response to being called out for not reading their bible, a Christian told me, "I don't need to READ it, when I BELIEVE it."
Usually they know everything, even the numbering of the verses. Except for the ugly parts of the beibel. Then they don't even know that it's in there at all.
I hate that I got so many of these right. Your story about Mt. Ararat reminds me of a time when my dad told me that the Ark of the Covenant had been found in Ethiopia and that there was a picture of it in our bible. It was a rock.
superstition - noun 1a: a belief or practice resulting from ignorance, fear of the unknown, trust in magic or chance, or a false conception of causation b: an irrational abject attitude of mind toward the supernatural, nature, or God resulting from superstition 2: a notion maintained despite evidence to the contrary Merriam-Webster
@@kevchard5214 No one has shown proof in 2000 years, so it is not true, just another ancient near eastern superstition. That is why I prefer eastern philosophy.
Another thing about the tower of babel is that god's master plan was to have his word written down. So why would he confuse the languages of the world and make the task of spreading his word much, much more difficult and prone to errors?
In the Hebrew Bible, almost all of the laws and history are for the Israelites. They don’t care about other people. Those others can be slaughtered or enslaved, for all Yahweh and the authors care. In “love thy neighbor,” Neighbor refers to the other Israelites around.
@@bigrigJim Inflation is not controlled by the president, it is the corporations. They "test" the market to see how high they can go. When corporations like Walmart, Amazon, Home Depot, etc. start lowering prices it is because they have reached a level where people are no longer buying which is what they are doing now. These things don't happen over night. Part of the problem with pricing is that tRUMP put a tax on goods from China... guess who pays for that??
@@marciwilliams8654 When we lost energy independence, the price of fuel nearly doubled. When the cost of fuel goes up, the cost of deliveries goes up , and the prices of all items go up across the board. That's economics 101. The "corporations" insure a free market , and that is what allows prices to come down. And Tariffs on products from China is, or was, a good thing. For the first time in 40 years I started seeing "made in USA" stamped on products in the industry I am in . That's worth paying a little more for something.
Fun fact: ancient people often found the bones of extinct ancient (usually mammoths) and didnt understand how the bones fit together. The femurs of most mammals look alike so they thought they were the bones of giant humans. Many of these bones were found buried under greek and roman temples and likely influenced mythology and the concept of "giants" in the Bible.
I'm sorry when he reached the songs of Solomon I completely broke down and started laughing hysterically I'm at work and everyone thinks I've lost my mind. I tried to get through it but every time he started talking and he added that music and it just completely broke me I couldn't stop laughing
I just read that story in Matthew. According to that version, the caretakers ran and told everyone how great Jesus is, for destroying their property, I guess???
I know more than my mother and I remind her constantly. I tell her about the absolutely terrible things her god does. She doesn’t believe me, so I give her the verses and make her read them out loud. Absolutely glorious. 😂😂😂
@@NJ-ju8fr Your thoughts are mine about 12 years ago. Go read the Bible. When you discover that I'm correct, you'll have a choice to make. You can make excuses for it, or you can see it for what it is and discard it as nothing more than ancient myth. I think you're the one that's scared.
I enjoyed this so much Seth 😁 You are so entertaining and funny! Spot - on with your hilarious 'game show' to illustrate the absurdity of passages in the Old Testament 😅😂😂
I love this quiz. Thank you for making it and letting me know that I am not the one who read these things as just wft. Big hugs the more I read the Bible the more I spiral down and I don't know what to do.❤
I like to catch Christians with Bibles where Luke 14:26 has been replaced with Matthew 10:37, or even an edited version of Matthew that is more " positive."
Oh Seth, you always amuse me! For what it's worth. Your videos are so therapeutic to me. Idk if that's sad or not 😅😂 Also, it's so crazy to me I got 75%ish of these right. I always thought so many "believers" knew a tone more about the Bible than me. It always astounds me how little they actually study it. Studying the Bible is what made me an athiest, go figure. 😂❤😊
I tried crickets once. Once you get past the idea that it's a bug, they're not bad. I had a friend who ate deep-fried scorpions. He said they reminded him of popcorn. I'll take his word for it. I grew up southern baptist, and I swear, they NEVER shut up.
"The Nephilim" are an example of the stories that ancient Middle Eastern men made up when they found the fossilized bones of Elasmosaurus and other prehistoric aquatic reptiles in the deserts of Israel.
@@misterdoctor9693 _"You can always hit that 1.5x play speed button"_ Yes, thank you. I recalled this just after posting, but left it for whatever observational value it may have, if any..
I started this thinking that maybe I'll guess a few, but apparently I know more than I'm aware of. The song of songs sounds like some teenager scribbles on the side of the manuscript, writing raunchy limericks about melons and peaches and eggplants and... the guy was really into fruits and vegetables. Must be all the thirst from living in that climate.
Seth, I laugh along with you at the absolute biblical nonsense of the good book. Well done, sir. There's no way I could believe in 7-year old rulers and 900 year old people 😂 Thank You
Not exactly surprising, especially when they are meant to be descendants of gods. Tutankhamen was ruler at 9 and apparently Shapur II of a Persian empire was crowned in the womb, and it seems a few were rulers as soon as they were born.
OMFG..."spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Also, I actually did better than I thought I would. Been a LONG time since I read the Bible. Only missed 5: 1. Age of Moses Upon Death (I was leaning towards 120; but I wasn't sure when in the timeline God limited mans' lifespan). 2. Who was the 7 year king - I just had no clue 3. Who ate Locust & Wild Honey - I remembered the story, but I thought for some reason it was Elijah 4. How the Taxes were paid by fish heads - I just didn't remember the story at all 5. How many legs an insect had - I never remembered hearing about 4 legged insects at all.
I don't feel well so I'm at home in bed trying to sleep. Except I can't because I keep losing my shit (esp over the game show noises 🤣) the Bible is absolutely fucking insane. I think the book sounds like a great idea. Do a children's bible stories collection...but for adults, fully illustrated 😂 Thanks for being so thorough Seth lmao
Ah, the Song of Songs, the only sexy book in the bible. My favorite reading of it had to be when David Fitzgerald got his wife to help recite some of it in front of a live audience accompanied by some swanky porn music. Of course a close second would be a hysterical literature version done by a lady from I believe the Netherlands. LOL.
This was fun! I love the comment about the Tower of Babel. I wonder about another aspect of the pig story. The Legion demons don’t want to be cast out, so they beg Jesus to send them into the herd of pigs, presumably to possess them instead. But… then they instantly kill the pigs. So… what was the point? They could’ve hung about making the pigs do weird stuff for a few years. Maybe Jesus wasn’t expecting that either and hot footed it away before the farmer discovered all the floating bodies. And here’s another- why did they ‘make signs’ at Zachariah like he was deaf?
1:10 I've not only got three copies of the buybull on my shelves. I've only got a copy of the Cure'em, I mean Koran. When I mentioned it to a bible-thumper, she asked, "How often do you read them?" I didn't bother to respond because I knew that, no matter how often I read them, it would never be enough for her. Honest to Pete, I spent one summer slogging through the Old and New Testicles. That's enough to satisfy me.
@timothymulholland7905 It was my job to keep my dad from falling asleep deep enough to start snoring. The pastor was legit boring though...explained the same point three complete times in only slightly different ways. "This sermon could have been a very short email" energy.
That reminds me of a rhyme my dad taught me: "Adam and Eve and Pinchme went down to the river to play. Adam and Eve were drowned. Who do you think got away?" (Be ready to pinch whomever you say this to 😀).
Well, can't say I got the more obscure ones like David's poor ammo choices or the Bible not knowing how many legs insects have, but I'm pretty happy with myself for getting about 3/4 of them right without needing to listen to the answers.
Jesus, together with Paul (Bunyan, that is), chopped down the cherry tree using George Washington's axe before leaving on the ship of Theseus. Then they all did Jaeger shots.
What was God's purpose in creating evil if his goal is to separate it from good and torment it for eternity? If the answer is to teach us the difference between good and evil, then why was his first command to Adam and Eve "But of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat."?
Tower of bable.... Not because the tower would reach heaven but because with cooperation and a common language, man could be like a god. It was not because of the height of the building... God was afraid that mankind may outdo him.
As a Scottish natural non believer, I’d identified as such until 2007 when I discovered Christopher Hitchens and the term Atheist, though he himself identified as a non theist. The ‘unfortunate’ aspect of that term Atheism is that you can be accused of having a ‘belief system’ called that, which is clearly ridiculous, but would never have been attributed to any ‘non believer’. An issue I have with most religion based anything in US, is the inevitable opportunity to ‘make a fast buck’ out of most things, like we’re hearing an example of here. This guy’s tales of ridicule are interesting, though reaction from existing believers may well fuel their Sports Team Supporters Mentality in retaliation, making us Atheists sound like a ‘team’ which we, at least till now were not. There’s a line between conveying the freedom to announce your non belief, and ending up seeming no better than one of the religions themselves, should you subscribe to such groups as this attempt
I'n an athiest (note the small a). I do believe people with religion are idiots, although some are good at heart, not scammers like Oral and Anal Roberts.
And yet you're here. What did you search? What were you looking for? I never met another atheist although I've never believed my entire life and I'm 71. Just like sports or bird watching or game playing, people gather when they have similar interests. In America, we are surrounded my religious people. You can't get away from them. So some of us like to hear from people who don't believe. Otherwise, were all individual. This is nothing compared to what Christian fascists are trying to do in this country. What nice is, you can just keep scrolling. Everything isn't for everyone. This country is rife with religion and it's encroaching on everyone else's life even people of other religions and people of no religion.🤷🏽♀️ That's nice for you you were allowed to not believe. Even though I've never believed I had to go through catechism, being baptized and being confirmed. Many of us were indoctrinated. They were not allowed to be a natural non-believer - so lucky you.
I bought what they called "Chapul High Protein Cricket Flour Bars" because The Sharks on The Tank bought into it, literally. During the demo the presentation included some disclaimer about people not worrying if something was crunchy, as it was the nuts and not the crickets in that particuler type of bar, LOL. So I had to try them and you would never know they were made with cricket flower, really. On Master Cheif one of the professional chefs commented on a dish. He that that you would ask for seconds if you know what it was: Rocky Mountain Oysters. I haven't been able to try that yet, but upon his recommendation, why not?
Thinking Atheist, Seth, this was fun. And yes, I knew them all. Like most atheists and few believers. Atheist Edge had their best run when they did their trivia game. They did include other religions, and announce answers and winners at the next one. 👍🏼🌊💙💙💙🌊🥰✌🏽
my question is: how does an all knowing deity not know what his own sons are up to? Like he didn’t know they were in pound town with those poor human women? I sincerely can’t believe I was part of this religion for three decades 🤦🏾♀️
that's because for the jews their god wasn't all knowing. the bible makes so much more sense when you take into account who wrote it and what were therm characters supposed to be like.
It isn't just a serpent that speaks. Genesis also has the burning bush, and Lot's wife turns into a pillar of salt, followed by both daughters conceiving children with their own father. Judges has talking trees that ask an olive tree to be their king. It refuses, then I think the trees ask a fig tree, then a thornbush, and then a vine, to be their king. I love the fictional "speaking" parts in the Holey Baloney ❤😂 #ReligionIsFiction, obviously.
Yes write the book! I would definitely read a seth translation of the bible, maybe send one to my brothers kids who are being raised evangelical & home schooled by parents that believe the world is only 6000 years old & dinosaur fossils were put there by god to test our faith
I got the number of stones david picked up wrong atheist card revoked talking about feet ruth rested her heaad at boaz feet or should we call him blowaz ??
And I find myself yelling the answers at my phone… Ty for the game show! I will edit with my score: I want to say 12/ 15 but I lost count listening to g to the wonderful rhetoric. Ty.
I started reading the Old Testament once, didn't get past Page 2, so I would fail a quiz. Same way I would fail a physics/high math quiz yet it only took me about 2 minutes to determine Terrance Howard was full of krap on the Joe Rogan Podcast.
Have been listening you for quite a while now and just dawned on me where I have heard your radio cadence! Late night AM radio in Oklahoma had....Garner Ted Armstrong! Been bugging me for years!
I'm a bit disappointed that "prophet excrement" was number 4 and not number 2
😆😆
Seth dropped the ball there.
Prophet fuel. The next great renewable energy source.
Seth is just preparing the test for Oklahoma's required Bible classes.
The test wont contain anything actually from the Bible only conservative christian lies just like the Bible.
I ripped a page out of my mother’s bible back in the 90s, it’s 2024 going into 25 & she still doesn’t know, that’s how much she has read the Bible in the intervening years
😂 good one
You can try to leave only the covers and replace the middle and see if the same is true. 😅
@@realitywave lol that's exactly why to be honest all stores were closed
The Bible is huge, even someone who reads it regularly might not notice a single page missing unless it was a part that they happened to read frequently. How can you even be sure that she hasn't noticed? There's no way you could ask her about it without revealing what you did, is that something she would just randomly mention?
@@mikean7074 because the 1 Bible in the house is still under the bed in my old room in the same place it was when I left it she hasn't bothered to find it let alone read it, I don't think Jesus would be particularly pleased with such neglect of his supposed divine words
So three nuns go to heaven, and St. Peter says "We're pretty full up, so you have to answer a Bible study question to get in. But you ladies were nuns, so I'm sure this will be simple for you."
The first nun steps up, and St Peter asks "Who was the first man?"
And she says "Adam", and so he lets her in.
The second nun steps up, and he asks "Who was the first woman?"
And she says "Eve", and in she goes.
Then the third nun steps forth, and St. Peter asks "What was the first thing Eve said to Adam?"
Now the third nun was pretty well stumped. She didn't remember anywhere in the Bible where that came up, and she says "Boy that's a hard one."
And in she went...
😮😮😮😮😮😮😅😅😮😊
One thing I've heard from Christians when I tell them something ugly from the bible is, "Where did you find that?" They should be telling ME!
Another is, "The bible does NOT say that! You must be reading THE DARK BIBLE!"
Worst of all, in response to being called out for not reading their bible, a Christian told me, "I don't need to READ it, when I BELIEVE it."
The "DARK BIBLE " which one is that?😂
It is true no matter what it says.
(or what happens in reality)
It cannot be more idiotic when even "institutions" like Dinesh D'Souza says that...
Usually they know everything, even the numbering of the verses.
Except for the ugly parts of the beibel. Then they don't even know that it's in there at all.
"I don't need to READ it, when I BELIEVE it" sounds like the same rationale for conspiracy theories.
Theists follow other peoples interpretations of their holy texts and think they are experts in their texts.
I hate that I got so many of these right. Your story about Mt. Ararat reminds me of a time when my dad told me that the Ark of the Covenant had been found in Ethiopia and that there was a picture of it in our bible.
It was a rock.
Its funny, atheist know more about the bible than theists.
I’m blown away that seemingly intelligent people still believe the ark story!
@@ginafrancis4950 But they are not intelligent.
This is an absolute hoot. I was laughing out loud, especially at one of the choices of the demons being cast out into MTG.
How do you know for sure that didn't already happen to MTG? 😊
Ezekiel bread really is a great example of how few people actually know/care what the Bible says.
My god, what the hell must have Ezekiel's bread tasted like?
@@kevinramsey417Tastes great.
Never heard of it, it must be a USA thing. In parts of Asia excrement is still used as fuel for the fire.
My son ate fried scorpions in Thailand on a dare. Doesn't taste like chicken, he said.
Great episode. You should do more of these.
superstition - noun
1a: a belief or practice resulting from ignorance, fear of the unknown, trust in magic or chance, or a false conception of causation
b: an irrational abject attitude of mind toward the supernatural, nature, or God resulting from superstition
2: a notion maintained despite evidence to the contrary
Merriam-Webster
True christianity !!!!!
@@kevchard5214 No one has shown proof in 2000 years, so it is not true, just another ancient near eastern superstition. That is why I prefer eastern philosophy.
@@iitywybmad29 Exactly!!! In 2000 years they have disproved more than proved.
"At this point the apologists start arguing with each other."
Wait, only at this point? I'm pretty sure they were doing that all along! :)
Follow the Gourd!
Love your sense of humor ! 😂
I totally want to buy a copy of Bible stories by Seth…… I’ll read it while I wear my Cat shirt 😂🤣😂
Me too!
I probably won't eat bugs, but if my protein powder was sourced from crickets or something I wouldn't care.
It's that damn crunch I couldn't handle
So you would in fact eat bugs? Just ground down bugs!
@@dreamingflurry2729 yeah, why not?
Idc.
@@BIayne Well, you said "I probably won't eat bugs..." - but if you eat them in powder form you are still eating bugs (not that I am criticizing it)
oh this was such a great idea Seth. please make more its hilarious *****
Another thing about the tower of babel is that god's master plan was to have his word written down. So why would he confuse the languages of the world and make the task of spreading his word much, much more difficult and prone to errors?
You hit the nail on the head. Their god is a dumbass. Why? Because the people who made it up were dumbasses.
Stop asking questions it’s embarrassing
Cuz then UA-camrs couldn’t make channels about ordering food in perfect chinese😮
In the Hebrew Bible, almost all of the laws and history are for the Israelites. They don’t care about other people. Those others can be slaughtered or enslaved, for all Yahweh and the authors care. In “love thy neighbor,” Neighbor refers to the other Israelites around.
@@scienceexplains302 ever read Leviticus 19:34?
We had a boy "king" here in USA from 2016 - 2020. His mental maturity was more like 4 years old, than 7.
No we had a bunch of boy and girl tards who hated him. Congratulations
Now get out of my country
oh I remember that . Back when everything cost less and we didn't have runaway inflation.
@@bigrigJim Inflation is not controlled by the president, it is the corporations. They "test" the market to see how high they can go. When corporations like Walmart, Amazon, Home Depot, etc. start lowering prices it is because they have reached a level where people are no longer buying which is what they are doing now. These things don't happen over night. Part of the problem with pricing is that tRUMP put a tax on goods from China... guess who pays for that??
@@marciwilliams8654 When we lost energy independence, the price of fuel nearly doubled. When the cost of fuel goes up, the cost of deliveries goes up , and the prices of all items go up across the board. That's economics 101. The "corporations" insure a free market , and that is what allows prices to come down. And Tariffs on products from China is, or was, a good thing. For the first time in 40 years I started seeing "made in USA" stamped on products in the industry I am in . That's worth paying a little more for something.
worst thing is, our "boy king" seems to have further regressed to that of a 2 year old.
Ok, I started cracking-up about the rubbing of the foreskin on Mosses' feet.
Yeah…like was this the first time circumcising came up in the Bible? If so…why was that where she went???
@@agiraffe3673 That's a really good question. Sometimes I think they put some of the bible themes in a random idea generator just to baffle people.
Fun fact: ancient people often found the bones of extinct ancient (usually mammoths) and didnt understand how the bones fit together. The femurs of most mammals look alike so they thought they were the bones of giant humans. Many of these bones were found buried under greek and roman temples and likely influenced mythology and the concept of "giants" in the Bible.
Thanks Seth. Just what I needed today. This was a fun way to start the day. 🖖
Oh, please! Make this a regular thing 😂
That Ezekiel bread had to taste like shit. Literally.
I really enjoyed this episode. Thank you.
Soo, if God confused everyone's languages, how come we're able to understand those languages today? The spell wear off? 🤔😹
Right?? Even as a little kid I sensed something was off about this one lol
The devil created Rosetta Stone that is what happened.
@@survive323 That darn devil. Always got some way to muck up God's plans LOL
@@survive323 LMFAO!!!!!!🤣🤣🤣
@@CatDaddyGuitar Why did I just read that in a Texan-Hill-Billy-Accent? :P
This was awesome! More please! 😂😊
I'm sorry when he reached the songs of Solomon I completely broke down and started laughing hysterically I'm at work and everyone thinks I've lost my mind. I tried to get through it but every time he started talking and he added that music and it just completely broke me I couldn't stop laughing
The average Jehovah's Witness kid knows more than adults at other churches. Probably why they outgrow it at an early age.
I resemble that remark
Seem to remember that the only group that knew the Bible better than atheists was Mormons, er, LDSers.
Laughed my ass off! Thanks Seth
And here I thought a group of pigs was called a police station.
Well pig farming is obviously not kosher, so fuck 'em I guess?
I just read that story in Matthew. According to that version, the caretakers ran and told everyone how great Jesus is, for destroying their property, I guess???
I'm very sad to admit that I missed one question. I'm so dumb.
LOL not really.. the whole Bible is dumb.
I know more than my mother and I remind her constantly. I tell her about the absolutely terrible things her god does. She doesn’t believe me, so I give her the verses and make her read them out loud. Absolutely glorious. 😂😂😂
I became an atheist trying to defend the Bible against charges that it condones rape.
Delete your first sentence. I’m not God but I’m scared for your soul.
@NJ-ju8fr What else would you call hiding in the bushes, waiting for a maiden to come along?
@@NJ-ju8fr Your thoughts are mine about 12 years ago. Go read the Bible. When you discover that I'm correct, you'll have a choice to make. You can make excuses for it, or you can see it for what it is and discard it as nothing more than ancient myth. I think you're the one that's scared.
@NJ-ju8fr To make the process quicker, I would google "evil Bible". Keep your Bible handy to make sure they're not lying about what it contains.
I enjoyed this so much Seth 😁 You are so entertaining and funny! Spot - on with your hilarious 'game show' to illustrate the absurdity of passages in the Old Testament 😅😂😂
👋Loved listening to these Bible stories... Laughed...😂
I love this quiz. Thank you for making it and letting me know that I am not the one who read these things as just wft. Big hugs the more I read the Bible the more I spiral down and I don't know what to do.❤
I like to catch Christians with Bibles where Luke 14:26 has been replaced with Matthew 10:37, or even an edited version of Matthew that is more " positive."
You catch them carrying it?
Oh Seth, you always amuse me! For what it's worth.
Your videos are so therapeutic to me. Idk if that's sad or not 😅😂
Also, it's so crazy to me I got 75%ish of these right. I always thought so many "believers" knew a tone more about the Bible than me. It always astounds me how little they actually study it. Studying the Bible is what made me an athiest, go figure. 😂❤😊
Roman Meal Bread, bred little Romans.
If the Bible is taught in school like you do, Seth, I support it 😊.
I tried crickets once. Once you get past the idea that it's a bug, they're not bad.
I had a friend who ate deep-fried scorpions. He said they reminded him of popcorn. I'll take his word for it.
I grew up southern baptist, and I swear, they NEVER shut up.
Love the format and music! Very entertaining. You’re giving off George Carlin vibes 😅
"The Nephilim" are an example of the stories that ancient Middle Eastern men made up when they found the fossilized bones of Elasmosaurus and other prehistoric aquatic reptiles in the deserts of Israel.
Seth always says the most interesting things in the most frustratingly slow way.
Maybe I'm just slow, but his pace is perfect for me. You can always hit that 1.5x play speed button.
@@misterdoctor9693 _"You can always hit that 1.5x play speed button"_
Yes, thank you.
I recalled this just after posting, but left it for whatever observational value it may have, if any..
Thing is, you can understand every word he says & that's important. Very articulate.
The only kingdoms a seven year old should ever be allowed to rule is Lego Kingdom, Playdough Land, and the Lord of the Tricycles 😂
I started this thinking that maybe I'll guess a few, but apparently I know more than I'm aware of.
The song of songs sounds like some teenager scribbles on the side of the manuscript, writing raunchy limericks about melons and peaches and eggplants and... the guy was really into fruits and vegetables. Must be all the thirst from living in that climate.
One of those half-breed giants was gamekeeper at Hogwarts!
So 😂so 😅love❤this!
Thank you! 🤩 I’m glad you did this. Even my 15 year old benefited as part of our home education 😅❤🎉
ROUSs?? Hahahaha made my morning 😂
I don't think they exist
These stories are totally believable 🤣🤣🤣
Ezekiel: *SMASH* "What is this, a Jerusalem for ants?"
It needs to be at least...three times as big!
Seth, I laugh along with you at the absolute biblical nonsense of the good book. Well done, sir. There's no way I could believe in 7-year old rulers and 900 year old people 😂 Thank You
Not exactly surprising, especially when they are meant to be descendants of gods.
Tutankhamen was ruler at 9 and apparently Shapur II of a Persian empire was crowned in the womb, and it seems a few were rulers as soon as they were born.
This is fantastic, thank you Seth
OMFG..."spiced wine of the juice of my pomegranate" 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Also, I actually did better than I thought I would. Been a LONG time since I read the Bible. Only missed 5:
1. Age of Moses Upon Death (I was leaning towards 120; but I wasn't sure when in the timeline God limited mans' lifespan).
2. Who was the 7 year king - I just had no clue
3. Who ate Locust & Wild Honey - I remembered the story, but I thought for some reason it was Elijah
4. How the Taxes were paid by fish heads - I just didn't remember the story at all
5. How many legs an insect had - I never remembered hearing about 4 legged insects at all.
Lolzzz...Yes please, to Seth Andrews' Bible Stories!😁⚘🤟
Is this new, modern, alleged "Ezekiel Bread" cooked over dung? If not, they should prepare to be smited .
I don't feel well so I'm at home in bed trying to sleep. Except I can't because I keep losing my shit (esp over the game show noises 🤣) the Bible is absolutely fucking insane. I think the book sounds like a great idea. Do a children's bible stories collection...but for adults, fully illustrated 😂 Thanks for being so thorough Seth lmao
Well done and funny. I hope you will do more.
Ah, the Song of Songs, the only sexy book in the bible. My favorite reading of it had to be when David Fitzgerald got his wife to help recite some of it in front of a live audience accompanied by some swanky porn music. Of course a close second would be a hysterical literature version done by a lady from I believe the Netherlands. LOL.
An audiobook narrated by Seth would be hilarious 😆
Imagine these quiz questions being used in the presidential debate. 😂
And Seth wins the Broyhill dining set and the World Book encyclopedias!
This was fun! I love the comment about the Tower of Babel.
I wonder about another aspect of the pig story. The Legion demons don’t want to be cast out, so they beg Jesus to send them into the herd of pigs, presumably to possess them instead. But… then they instantly kill the pigs. So… what was the point? They could’ve hung about making the pigs do weird stuff for a few years. Maybe Jesus wasn’t expecting that either and hot footed it away before the farmer discovered all the floating bodies.
And here’s another- why did they ‘make signs’ at Zachariah like he was deaf?
I didn't know about the excrement one, but I was 100% confident in picking it as the right answer because it is the Bible, after all!
1:10 I've not only got three copies of the buybull on my shelves. I've only got a copy of the Cure'em, I mean Koran. When I mentioned it to a bible-thumper, she asked, "How often do you read them?" I didn't bother to respond because I knew that, no matter how often I read them, it would never be enough for her. Honest to Pete, I spent one summer slogging through the Old and New Testicles. That's enough to satisfy me.
When I fell asleep in always boring church, my mom would pinch me.
@timothymulholland7905 It was my job to keep my dad from falling asleep deep enough to start snoring. The pastor was legit boring though...explained the same point three complete times in only slightly different ways. "This sermon could have been a very short email" energy.
I thought only the RCC was SO boring. The priests just droned on and on about sin, hell, abortion, premarital sex, etc. (Boomer)
That reminds me of a rhyme my dad taught me:
"Adam and Eve and Pinchme went down to the river to play.
Adam and Eve were drowned. Who do you think got away?"
(Be ready to pinch whomever you say this to 😀).
Ahhh snatch the Grasshopper from my hand Pebbles...
Well, can't say I got the more obscure ones like David's poor ammo choices or the Bible not knowing how many legs insects have, but I'm pretty happy with myself for getting about 3/4 of them right without needing to listen to the answers.
Got about 65% right, but it has been some time since I read the bible and (believed) and now
Jesus, together with Paul (Bunyan, that is), chopped down the cherry tree using George Washington's axe before leaving on the ship of Theseus. Then they all did Jaeger shots.
What was God's purpose in creating evil if his goal is to separate it from good and torment it for eternity? If the answer is to teach us the difference between good and evil, then why was his first command to Adam and Eve "But of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat."?
Tower of bable.... Not because the tower would reach heaven but because with cooperation and a common language, man could be like a god. It was not because of the height of the building... God was afraid that mankind may outdo him.
I scored 100% but I've been listening since '15.
"She [Delilah] cut his hair."
Nope. That's a good trick Bible question: Who cut Sampson's hair?
💖💓💗👏💯 love your tellings and sense of humor!
As a Scottish natural non believer, I’d identified as such until 2007 when I discovered Christopher Hitchens and the term Atheist, though he himself identified as a non theist.
The ‘unfortunate’ aspect of that term Atheism is that you can be accused of having a ‘belief system’ called that, which is clearly ridiculous, but would never have been attributed to any ‘non believer’.
An issue I have with most religion based anything in US, is the inevitable opportunity to ‘make a fast buck’ out of most things, like we’re hearing an example of here.
This guy’s tales of ridicule are interesting, though reaction from existing believers may well fuel their Sports Team Supporters Mentality in retaliation, making us Atheists sound like a ‘team’ which we, at least till now were not.
There’s a line between conveying the freedom to announce your non belief, and ending up seeming no better than one of the religions themselves, should you subscribe to such groups as this attempt
I'n an athiest (note the small a). I do believe people with religion are idiots, although some are good at heart, not scammers like Oral and Anal Roberts.
And yet you're here. What did you search? What were you looking for? I never met another atheist although I've never believed my entire life and I'm 71.
Just like sports or bird watching or game playing, people gather when they have similar interests.
In America, we are surrounded my religious people. You can't get away from them.
So some of us like to hear from people who don't believe. Otherwise, were all individual.
This is nothing compared to what Christian fascists are trying to do in this country.
What nice is, you can just keep scrolling.
Everything isn't for everyone. This country is rife with religion and it's encroaching on everyone else's life even people of other religions and people of no religion.🤷🏽♀️
That's nice for you you were allowed to not believe. Even though I've never believed I had to go through catechism, being baptized and being confirmed.
Many of us were indoctrinated. They were not allowed to be a natural non-believer - so lucky you.
Thanks!
I bought what they called "Chapul High Protein Cricket Flour Bars" because The Sharks on The Tank bought into it, literally. During the demo the presentation included some disclaimer about people not worrying if something was crunchy, as it was the nuts and not the crickets in that particuler type of bar, LOL. So I had to try them and you would never know they were made with cricket flower, really.
On Master Cheif one of the professional chefs commented on a dish. He that that you would ask for seconds if you know what it was: Rocky Mountain Oysters. I haven't been able to try that yet, but upon his recommendation, why not?
Thinking Atheist, Seth, this was fun. And yes, I knew them all. Like most atheists and few believers. Atheist Edge had their best run when they did their trivia game. They did include other religions, and announce answers and winners at the next one. 👍🏼🌊💙💙💙🌊🥰✌🏽
Thanks for the juice oh Great One!
my question is: how does an all knowing deity not know what his own sons are up to? Like he didn’t know they were in pound town with those poor human women? I sincerely can’t believe I was part of this religion for three decades 🤦🏾♀️
that's because for the jews their god wasn't all knowing. the bible makes so much more sense when you take into account who wrote it and what were therm characters supposed to be like.
This is a good reason why you should never watch youtube videos with headphones on.
Ow.
This was a fun quiz to do with my girlfriend. Kinda wished Seth kept track of the numbers for us, though
You need to do more of these please
It isn't just a serpent that speaks. Genesis also has the burning bush, and Lot's wife turns into a pillar of salt, followed by both daughters conceiving children with their own father.
Judges has talking trees that ask an olive tree to be their king. It refuses, then I think the trees ask a fig tree, then a thornbush, and then a vine, to be their king.
I love the fictional "speaking" parts in the Holey Baloney ❤😂 #ReligionIsFiction, obviously.
Yes write the book! I would definitely read a seth translation of the bible, maybe send one to my brothers kids who are being raised evangelical & home schooled by parents that believe the world is only 6000 years old & dinosaur fossils were put there by god to test our faith
I got the number of stones david picked up wrong atheist card revoked talking about feet ruth rested her heaad at boaz feet or should we call him blowaz ??
Great program but too easy. I was hoping for a mention of Jael.
I live in a country where you can have a child king and children are welcome in most pubs.
And I find myself yelling the answers at my phone… Ty for the game show! I will edit with my score: I want to say 12/ 15 but I lost count listening to g to the wonderful rhetoric. Ty.
I started reading the Old Testament once, didn't get past Page 2, so I would fail a quiz. Same way I would fail a physics/high math quiz yet it only took me about 2 minutes to determine Terrance Howard was full of krap on the Joe Rogan Podcast.
Seth this was great but I still think it was MTG. LOL
Spit out my coffee on the mtg one🤣
All the mommies literally popped 😅
The nepfilums were 450ft. Tall. What a silly book. 😅
The nephilim have a lot of similarities to the Titans, the original Pantheon Greek gods.
The only one I got wrong was luke's profession, and the number of stones david had.
Have been listening you for quite a while now and just dawned on me where I have heard your radio cadence!
Late night AM radio in Oklahoma had....Garner Ted Armstrong!
Been bugging me for years!
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
More, more😂😂😂😂😂
*pointy devil loins*