The Histrionic Male
Вставка
- Опубліковано 3 лип 2022
- Histrionic Personality Disorder is part of the Cluster B group of personalities and is characterised by exaggerated emotionality and attention seeking behaviours such as being seductive, amplified gestures, rapidly shifting and shallow emotions.
In this video Darren Magee looks at some of the common characteristics and behaviours in a man with histrionic personality and outlines how they manifest in relationships.
If you find this video interesting or helpful please consider supporting me on Patreon
/ dfmagee
#histrionicpersonalitydisorder #histrionic #DarrenMagee
I broke up with my ex boyfriend, and while I was packing his things, I came across paperwork saying that he had been diagnosed with histrionic personality disorder. He told me about the anxiety and depression diagnosis, but not this. We were together for 12 years...and after watching this video and many others on the topic. Everything is making so much sense now.
I often think HPD is often best spotted on social media. They're the attention seekers. The ones who post photos or stories that beg for compliments or sympathy. The gym shots, the vaguely sexualised ones, or the ones of them looking Ill or in a hospital bed.
What's wrong with gym shots
@@TheBroSplit they’re very often attention seeking.
@@BrendaLG they are it's a little show off. But then that means all those fitness guys, including myself have a sort of histrionic PD?
I totally agree. This disorder is a person has insecurities.
@@TheBroSplit I'm guessing they mean all of that together. Even then it's a stretch. HPD is all consuming and ruins lives. It's one thing to be sexual on your own platform and another to sexualize yourself at inappropriate times to people you're not even attracted to because not having that attention makes you feel abandoned.
I think one of the main ways it can also manifest in men is the constant need to be the comedian.
Definitely! Everything is a performance!
I see their behavior as being a,' Moochie and a Fraud'.
From what I've observed without a professional background is; they tend to be; terrible with money, always need a place to live, tend to have alcohol abuse issues, a victim mentality, low self worth/esteem due to refusing to do their inner child/shadow/spiritual work, any true work. They refuse accountability, self awareness, ownership to evolve as a grown man.
Definitely. Real developmental issues.
This was my experience but he’d make out like he owns his shit and tell ME to take responsibility and then tell MY friends how I blame him for my problems and exaggerate issues between us to the point where my friend Unfriended me and made out like I was a monster after to get back at me for starting to reach out for help in the community because of the psychological abuse I was experiencing with him denying all the things he did and telling me I made it all up??
He seemed to truly believe that he was the responsible grown up one who would shame me for being a grown woman who still blames others for my problems which is exactly what my parents did when I tried holding them accountable for their behaviour that was affecting and hurting me a lot!
He was always high on his own supply. Constantly escaping and dissociating and never remembered a thing about what he’d done the next day. Never remembered anything actually, which is sad. The moments of his life were spent just escaping reality and never resembling anything then denying the way he did behave because he just can’t remember it
As a male with traits of this personality disorder including anxious/ambivalent attachment style I couldn’t agree more. It’s almost as if there was nothingness within me and only the presence of another person helped me see who I am. I cannot be accountable if I am not able to figure out what my accountability is and I hate it.
I am an F60.4 man and I am unironically sorry for being all that stuff that you've mentioned. I hope we all (people with this kind of disorder) can overcome this. Even if I actually care only about my own change. Maybe that would also affect me if *everybody* can overcome that. HPD in a man is just... Freaking cringe. I hope to get over it.
I also think they like to portray themselves as very deep feeling, warm, sensitive people.
But they don’t actually have any deep emotions and can be very cold. It’s a shock that they can behave like that and it really hurts when you realise that they actually just don’t care at all.
And how exactly do you know that?
@@tuffyluv because I met someone like that. But thanks for attempting to defend someone you don’t know from someone else you don’t know.
@@justlivinglife465 thanks for generalizing a group of people based on ur interaction with one.
This is actually very common IMHO because the behavior is celebrated and rewarded in society. I think it is also a learned behavior. I see it a lot in my culture (Latin culture), which is also highly narcissistic. The female/male roles taught are male:narcissist and female: histrionic or borderline. Thank you.
You are all wrong. You do not understand personality disorders. They are NOT learned behavior, and Latin culture is not highly narcissistic. Someone living with a personality disorder will not typically be celebrated or rewarded for their behavior, at least not long term. They typically end up excommunicated from their social circle and family. And both men and women suffer from NPD and BPD.
Personality disorders come about due to genetics and dysfunctional childhood dynamics. They are not learned. They are maladaptive coping mechanisms.
People who are attention loving, post a lot of selfies, wear flashy clothes, etc are not narcissistic although sometimes PD people will use these tactics to get supply.
Trust me, when you have an up close experience with someone with a PD, you will KNOW. Its nothing like what you are describing.
@@ed8329you are correct people with hpd are shunned from family or close circles or even at gatherings because of their overtly seductive inappropriate behaviour.. people see them in bad light..it's not a good specially for women it's self destructive.
@@ed8329 You made an erroneous assimption re: the above person's comment about Latin culture. The OP said they see it a lot in Latin culture. You replied that Latin culture is not narcissistic. While you're both right in a sense, there are a lot of aspects re: Latin culture that is narcissistic. I live in Mexico and I see it a lot. Is it 100% of the culture. I would say no, as that's a huge assumption and it's a big country.
But spoiling the children like they do here; calling them king, queen, etc., and then the harsh society and struggling financial situations for a lot leads a lot to grow up very arrogant in a bullish sort of manner. I've seen it. It's a different kind of arrogant than what I see in the US. It's this "you can't touch me because I'm the best person in the world", etc. This is both males and females. Is it everyone? Nope.
(I also had an extremely arrogant and macho boss who is from Mexico. Big whoop, right? He didn't care about what you could and couldn't say here, like he didn't know labor laws even though he was a manager. I saw his social media once...it's all him flexing his muscles because he thinks he's the know it all of bodybuilding, which he's not because he admitted to not working out every body part like those he idolized. He basically turned himself into a show pony)
@@jonnuanez7183 Narcissism is a personality disorder that occurs in an individual. Sure, an entire group of people could have NPD and therefore their culture would be narcissistic. But that won't happen to an entire continent (Latin America). Arrogance is its own issue and doesn't always correlate with NPD. Feel free to learn about NPD and other personality disorders from mental health professionals, there are many of them on UA-cam who are accredited. But calling a culture "narcissistic" is really goofy and indicates a lack of understanding of the meaning of the word. People really overuse the term and its lost its meaning.
@@ed8329 You didn't read and understand what I said, just like the other person. I have a complete sentence where I said that Latin culture is too huge to be called narcissistic (hint: it's the last sentence in the first paragraph), though there's quite a bit of it going on. Just like the other person said that it's not the whole society but a lot of it going on.
Please reread what I wrote before responding. Thank you.
Its interesting because the cluster Bs can all kind of intertwine and each person is unique. But I think the most defining feature of hpd is their constant need for attention and thier constant need to flirt with everyone and everything even if they have no interest in that person. Which is quite odd really. Its like thier obsessed with knowing they are attractive and desirable to the point that it causes major issues. While they dont always cheat per se its not easy to be dating someone whos goal is to constantly make you feel jealous and insecure
Yup. Come home and tell you all the different women who complimented him or asked why he’s not married. Showing women he has no interest in personal intimate videos/pictures of his current partner just to get an reaction of both parties. Telling you about female friends who he “thinks” likes him.It’s very ODD!
Triangulating us very narcissistic
Oh my! This perfectly describes my estranged husband! I thought he was a covert narcissist (although I did receive the devaluation / discard / silent treatment / aggressive behaviour - mental and physical). It always seems to be his way or the highway! A child in a man’s body - never grown up emotionally!
i am in the same boat. Since i am not a dr, i have trouble telling the difference .my husband is either a covert narc or has HPD...hard to tell as a "layperson". very exhausting, i am becoming the proverbial "grey rock"..even this can make him go into a meltdown, like a little toddler !!! always wants attention
@@belgadog99 hpd is highly comorbid with npd. In fact, many want to be removed and be move under npd subtype. So you’re not wrong about what you have observed.
"He may even blame the partner, blame the kids for holding him back from some kind of greatness." OMG rotfl! My ex had this kind of story right before he left, claiming I'd ruined his chances at some kind of huge promotion to District Manager when we moved so I could start my career, even though that move had been planned for ages. I knew it was a lie, too. Who promotes a part-time temp employee to full-time District Manager - a position he never applied for and has never had in his life? But no, of course my success was his failure. I was like "no, dude, that did not happen" rotfl the stories they tell...
Mine hassled me for apparently holding him back from pursuing another woman who he thought was into him! 🤣 In reality she wasn’t. She is a 9 and he’s a 3 but he thought he was pretty deserving.
@@lucibloom5966 😂😂
These are disorders. How about some compassion for all involved.
A very good cover story for their failures
I met a older guy I believe to have this. I couldn’t put my finger on it but I knew him constantly talking about him self and his accomplishments/future goals, how everybody loves him, speaking in 3rd person at random times, constant mood changes,and making scenes when he enters a room we’re all very on the spectrum and it’s over whelming/weird….
These people post on Facebook things like 'I'm so upset'. No explanation, making all their (usually hundreds of) 'friends' hurl themselves into a mad panic to find out what's wrong. Probably broke a fingernail 😜🤣
Or somebody else’s lol
Thank you for covering male HPD - literature doesn’t dare go deep into detail as it dies with female HPD ! I love your format. Concise, accurate and accessible.
I know that my sister in law is a histrionic female. I am realizing her brother, my late husband, was the male version. Which was less flamboyant, etc… but this is so spot on my head is spinning.
Thanks, Darren. Your presentation on the Histrionic female was insightful. It seems the lines between narcissism and HPD are often blurred; like standing on the county line with one foot in each county.
There's some discussion about whether HPD should be removed from the DSM. Many people view it as a form of NPD.
@@gardener3017 so much overlap between them. It's apparently very common if someone has one of them, they're likely to have at least one of the others. It'll be interesting to see how our understanding of these things improves over the years.
@@th8257 Histrionic PD is a form of narcissism...
I had a female lesbian therapist who used to wear big leather bdsm cuffs to our therapy session and she would draw attention to them regularly while I was speaking, which made me feel
Super duper uncomfortable! I didn’t continue with her despite liking her methods. I wasn’t sure if she was asserting her sexuality to me or hitting on me but it was too much. Not an appropriate context to wear bdsm leather cuffs imo.
Your therapist was mentally ill.
Yeah…that is really creepy behaviour.
WTF 😝 Very unprofessional.
The reason why they're many is because it's praised in society and glorified
This is so helpful and i do hope young people can benefit from it.
The first time I went into a lawyers office, desperately needing to save myself I just didn't know how to explain what i was going through. I had no one to turn to , and it was a time we did not betray our husband.
Omg! Right? 😳
I went to see a psychiatrist after my GP diagnosed me with bipolar 2 and the psychiatrist quickly labelled me as histrionic and not bipolar. I came home and checked histrionic criteria , i feel so offended .
Bipolar 2 and histrionic are vastly different. I'm surprised they had such differing opinions.
Omg 🙌🏻 YES!
He invited me to his going away party as he was heading overseas. I’d broken up with him a few days before but agreed to come and told him numerous times I was on the train and then when I got there he told me he wasn’t coming because his other friends weren’t coming…which hurt me a lot and when I got mad at him for wasting my time, understandably so, and he then got mad at me for getting mad about it?? He then decided that I was deliberately rubbing it in his face that no one showed up to say goodbye and completely deflected from the fact that he stood me up!
My phone battery died Half way through the argument and I walked around so upset for an hour before going g home and charging the phone and had a bath.
When I finally responded he’d attacked me for apparently lying about the phone dying just to deliberately ignore him! I stupidly fell into his trap and kept trying to prove that I wasn’t lying but he wouldn’t believe me. SO aggravating!
I blocked him after that and couldn’t be bothered…good riddance. I was hoping he’d never come back but he did after two weeks and then started punishing me for not being there to support him while he was overseas screwing every woman who would have him, not giving a shit about how he’d treated me.
He’d exclude me at parties then turn around and start cuddling me when no one was around the next morning while I was asleep then tell me later that I sexually harassed him because I thought he was wanting me and took him somewhere so we could fool around??
He would always text me and made me think he was into me and I felt close to him eventually.
I literally texted him twice in 8 months and asked if I could come over for sex and after that he accused me of being a sex pest who was always harassing him for sex??? He told me at the end that he was not that into me?? After texting me every day multiple times a day for 8 months?? I said why did he keep coming over if he thought the sex was boring and he wasn’t into me? He told me because I NEEDED IT??? Wtf?? I’m a very attractive woman. I don’t have any problems finding men who are interested and he thinks he’s a ten but he’s actually a 3! Just an annoying twat!
He’d pick arguments with me constantly then one day out of the blue he texted me to say he wanted for us to stop having sex (two days after telling me how good in bed I was and how other women don’t know what they’re doing??) When K simply said “ok” and have no emotional reaction he started telling me the sex was boring and he’s had better, he can do better and there are better women??
Who says that after you’ve already agreed to his boundary without question??
He’d then accuse me of raging at h despite the text in record showing no emotional reaction from me? He insisted I was raging though 😆 When I finally did snap and say something back to him he went and told my only support network bestie and she contacted me to basically say she can’t believe she let me into her house what a monster I was??
I knew he was baiting.
They are the most ridiculous people. I could go on and on about the craaaaazy shit that went on before I finally blocked him but suffice to say everything you said confirms my suspicions that he was a male histrionic with a strong narcissistic streak! So glad I showed him that he will never have access to me again and Im not longer an option.
They do just feed on the drama
This and more, .... 100% spot on, Thanks Darren!
Fascinating channel , thank you .
great content!
Thank you for replying to my comment. I will check put the playlist you recommended. This video was also very interesting. Thank you so much for this amazing videos.
Definitely learning much more everyday here Darren, appreciates you a lot for sharing this video with us! I really enjoyed all of the explanations here! Great video and keep educating us!❤
I thoroughly enjoy your videos, I learn so much from them. Congrats on that increasing subscriber count! 🥳
Don't forget about wearing a cape!
I have been diagnosed with histrionic characteristic (mild), I never develope the desorder but I have characteristics for sure I also have ADHD. Any questions just ask;) btw I raised by a father with NPD and BPD with so sociopats traits.
I believed I met a guy who has HPD personality desorder and ADHD, we are very similar, but a huge differences is that I have empathy and im genuily interested to people, he just speak about himself.
At the beginner I thought he was a Narcs then I realize he had HPD, he is also a cheater.
Honestly people who really develope cluster B, for me are to avoid.
Thanks for this great video!
Spot on thank you.
Thanks Darren for another great video. I don’t know if you need any more positive feedbacks but I wanted to leave the following, I hope it blesses you or maybe someone else can use it too.
I noticed these days some people like complaining against others calling a spade a spade. They are keep complaining that explanations and naming things are labelling. As if talking against labelling is the new fashionable thing to do. Yet when it suits them and their agendas then they label whoever or whatever they want. If you dare to say the truth, help others to stand up or help others to see things more clearly, and when this doesn’t suits them, well, then they are immediately labelling you a “labeller” 🤦🏼♀️😆🤣. One rule for them completely another for someone else.
In reality it is normal and logical to name, label and use explanations to help us communicate as long as it is not done to cause suffering! We need to use terms and descriptions to engage in a healthy way and interact in a commonsensical manner. This is a necessary part of life. More importantly using our language is precious to us. When someone starts fiddling with the healthy way we are engaging, then it is a tell tell sign of an unconscious agenda.
Most people heard the saying: Give back to Caesar what is Caesar’s and to God what is God’s. Meaning give respect, credit and place healthy boundaries where it is due.
Darren you help people see where respect, credit and healthy boundaries are needed to be placed. You are doing a great job making these free videos. Your efforts are valuable contributions to this world and our conscious development. I hope you will not let anyone stop you from saying the truth. Because what you say and the way you say it is very helpful to so many people who have been suffering due to lack of information.
Thank you Darren. I find your videos very helpful. I'd be very interested on what you would have to say about the mental health aspects of menopause, and it's potential impacts on relationships.
Thank you for your suggestion
I'm a psych student of over 8 years! Been studying officially and unofficially now for 8 years, I'm Autistic so it's a long-term intense special interest, as is research in general.
Anyway I wanted to say it's nice to hear a familiar accent discussing cluster B PDs, I'm from N.I myself and feel like here is a difficult place to practice or study psych as a lot of people still have the notion that we are just making things up lol.
I find myself watching lectures or videos often from every country but my own, so this is a nice experience. ☺️
On HPD: I always try to explain that it's not that people with PDs don't love people, it's that the *way* they experience 'love' and act it out, is unhealthy and damaging. It's not an absence of love, but an inability to express love in any sort of healthy or nurturing or balanced way. They may feel love intensely but it is experienced as obsession, pain, it could trigger a core wound that causes the person to 'act out' in whichever way they tend to. People often assume that people with PDs behave the way they behave to personally harm them, but it's really a pathological way of behaving in response to 'love' or intimacy. They generally are not thinking of their partner, as they're overwhelmed with their inner turmoil.
HPD is different to NPD, BPD, and ASPD and for me it's been quite a difficult PD to grasp. I have so much experience with ASPD, NPD and BPD but so little with HPD. What makes it stand out to me is that the PD has formed, not in a way that is congruent with survival. With BPD, and NPD, the behaviour comes from fear of abandonment, fear of engulfment, fear of betrayal, fear of losing control, fear of intimacy, therefore the pathological behaviours are constructed in a way that will protect the person with the PD from their fear. HPD has formed to, what? Guarantee a string of inconsistent and damaging attention? That really stumps me.
Even within ASPD it's clear which parts make up the whole PD. People with this PD will often feel empty, chronically bored, they'll feel a hatred and detest for others that they can't explain, they'll 'act out' in order to receive what feels like a reward to their brain. They may harm people because their brain is picking up 'bad' behaviour as 'good' 'rewarding' behaviour. Again with ASPD there is this deep rooted survival element. 'im on my own and everyone else is meaningless so f*ck them! I will have the last word!'. That's pure survival.
But HPD? How does one's brain start mapping that pathology out? To receive attention, especially meaningless, shallow, attention is not at all rooted in survival. I understand that possible if during childhood the person was ignored and neglected to an extreme degree that they then may develop a personality that includes malingering and attention seeking. However, I can't grasp yet how it reaches full blown HPD. To me there seems to be no logic, no real pattern, and no explanation. People with HPD have been found to have on average lower intelligence than those with other PDs. Is that a possible factor in the pathology? As people with HPD don't seem to have the same level of manipulative skill as those with Aspd, NPD, or BPD, they have shallow, rapid cycling emotions, they lie so often that people around them quickly recognise their malingering, they tend to have extremely short volatile relationships which are even more short and unstable than someone with BPD. They are truly a living characateur of a human, and it tends to be blatantly obvious. With no attempts or real ability to hide it.
I'm not saying that Disorders need to make logical sense, it's just something that I get stuck on due to HPD breaking the pattern in so many different ways compared to other PDs and other cluster B PDs. The only thing it seems to have in common is the dramatic nature. Everything else is so opposite. We usually talk about PDs being rooted in trauma, or in the structure of a person's brain. We usually have a baseline idea of 'why', but for HPD I can't for the life of me figure out 'why'.
Sorry for the rambling, you can see why I've spent so long within psychology 😂 This stuff keeps me up at night and will likely fuel my next few years of research.
Most histrionic women are sexually abused as child and neglected and put down by their parents and relatives..I think these people are hurt inside but they show outwardly that they are happy.
As I'm listening to this, isn't this histrionic thing an increasing 'sight' in people these days, much more than the narcissistic personality? And does the histrionic personality eventually turn into narcissism? Thank you for these beautiful insights.
There are a lot of similarities and crossovers, and they can be co morbid
@@DarrenFMagee Thank you for the info. (I just watched the Video on the female version and heard you explaining that already)
There's some discussion about removing HPD from the DSM as some people simply view it as a form of NPD. It'll be interesting to see how our understanding of these things advances over the years.
@@copacetictranquillam8154 It's really common with cluster B personality disorders - if someone has one, they very often have at least one of the others too.
@@th8257 which makes therapy even more impossible if you can't isolate if therapy will help or hurt the individual. BPD you're lucky enough to potentially heal, but other areas you're likely going to get worse with therapy but no one knows if they can't tell because all the symptoms are all mixed together. It's as if we need to be putting more heavy emphasis on early detection in elementary and high school >_>
You explain PD’s perfectly…..
Hey, not saying you're wrong with the things you say, but especially the more extreme traits and harmful behaviors towards others are not found in every histrionic person. I can confirm many tendencies described, but being even a little self-reflected and empathetic makes you not act on impulses, like every other person. I'm diagnosed with histrionic personality disorder myself, and especially in my youth I basically lived the disorder. Never though did I lie and/or cheat myself through a relationship or bent a story my way in order to grab attention. Don't get me wrong, I had plenty of dramatically dysfunctional relationships when I was young and basically lived life like a story, but that doesn't mean that I was a deceptive A-hole.
I am now in my forties and had a lot of therapy and experience, and many of my histrionic tendencies are still there somewhere, especially the emotional part, but I am very aware of what's dysregulation and what's not and there's no more drama in my life.
But not even in my most dramatic, histrionic dysfunctionality have I been the way that video describes. Histrionic personality disorder doesn't mean you are not aware of hurting someone and also doesn't mean you care less.
That said, I am absolutely sure there's also enough A-holes out there who are exactly as described. You don't need a personality disorder though to be a toxic jerk.
2 years ago I heard a renowned psychologist said that the board behind the DSM-5 were considering 'erasing' HPD because the symptoms overlap too much with the other cluster B PDs, especially NPD. And I agree. What Darren described here really matches some of the behaviors of the narcissistic ex. I said 'some' because he was a lot more manipulative and antagonistic than a mere acute attention seeker described here. Histrionic wants any amount of attention from anyone, but attention is not enough for narcs, they wanna be worshipped.
So I agree with those doctors, HPD is like "NPD-Light"
I think at the root, NPD is “I am special/best”, while HPD is “I am loved”. Both disorders need attention, but the root cause is different.
3:50+ "He will get distressed if she doesn't answer all his texts & his phone calls straight away." "He may become a pest to her friends & her family & will ingratiate himself in all the other people in her life.." Yes, yes, thank you.
As a documented victim of crime I've known & trusted very few people (to this day ,I have only known like 4 people long term in healthy mutual friendships, which I know is relatively normal0)& someone *used their family (a geologist father, a lawyer mother, an autistic brother) to get into my life (their friend contacted me to set us up "He likes you would you talk with him?") & they bought all kinds of 'liberal books' about feminist lesbian cancer fighters (that I dont read I am post-feminist not feminist & I told them this: because the books were the first red flag) & unhinged brilliant women, & they worked really hard to play some kind of character & I got scared.
I told them how I felt that it was like "walking on eggshells" I only found out later this is a common phrase!! So scary to find this out!!
In the hard work which was the process of their using pathological lying to get to know me they told me they admired me, that I was a "genius" for accomplishing all I have accomplished in the face of adversity, & why ,that I was helping them at a turning point in their life after "suicidal" suffering & issues with authority (which they begged me to help them with) & after graduating & their "being ready to get a job & start a new life".
They became a person I never realized was inside of them & would catch anyone off guard.
I tried to dump them like 15 times & they (as you said) would call call call call dozens of times, until I answered.
Then they disappeared.
They literately vanished.
They forced me to beg for a painting I made as a child on social media for months & they actually mailed it back to me.
Then, they all of a sudden were a pro-child abuse pro-domestic abuse (I am a victim of both from several adults as a child it is in myth records) right wing extremist & posting secret illegal media made of me they made in the last place I lived.
They made illegal media of me here up by the preserves after whining about wanting to beat me with a wooden bat as a way to "deal with their authority issues" at a place that I go to to feel safe after a life time of criminal abuse & have gone to my whole life & of course I said no.
It was not a relationship, it was a long distance abuse situation or a lie with only a hand full of days when they would visit & I worked so hard to take care of them every time they visited.
This is a crime called rape by deception.
Now many years later all their close friends (that they had all along) are new age right wing extremists on the net who have overthrown abortion & he lives at home incompetent & unemployable & toxic & abuses me year after year by sharing illegally made videos of me on discord & on the dark net & the net he made overtly at the last place I lived probably to make money & to attract more criminals & transwomen with visceral hatred of children & women to me (they warned me about transwomen hating women btw). They are all hoping that womens rights will be so demolished that they can 'legally' share illegal abuse on the net to really bring it all home.
As an unemployed living at home abuser with no internet or career life on the net he works really really hard to ruin my life which was his intention all along as a hopeful member of the Wikileaks cult & their diabolical hatred of children, women & swedes.
I know a few people who match HPD and also know other people who might be full blown NPD and I do not find them the same. NPDs try to manage you and HPDs just want your continuous attention, but they do not desire to somehow take master you. They would become sad and amp up their attention seeking behaviour, but woul rarely put down etc. HPDs are draining, but NPDs outright malitious.
Thank you. Its weird you are describing my ex boyfriend and my life the last 3 years. I'm still so sad.
Excellent 👍😍🤩
Darren, have you ever heard of codependent from a very large cluster b family who then marries a codependent woman who is also from a cluster b family then together have a borderline daughter? You wouldn’t believe what this is like!
Had an ex BF like this. Eccchhh.
❤yup more projection going on from these people than an infinite number of movie theatres
Please could we look at dealing with a family member who is being controlled by a NPD partner.
there was a guy in my school he used to give me hints dat he liked me, eventually i liked him too, but one day he'll be giving so much attention to me next day he behaves like I'm a stranger, so wen i stop giving him attention, withdraw from dis sh*t for my self respect. then he'll get upset and again tries to win my attention back. once i asked him does he like me or not, and he said we're just friends, and still was behaving like flirting with me. he has a lot of female friends, and he talks with everyone in the way they like them, and wen someone has spotlight he makes fun of them, does dis mean he has hpd. but finally i gave up, i understood how he treated me was so brutal. pls anyone if u kno say, if dis is hpd or not.
OMG. Sounds exactly like my husband.
Can Dislexia be related to any of these PD's?
I have a few histrionic traits. I always go into public wearing a little flair, passively fishing for attention, speaking in an old-timey inflection, and it's all in the name of presentation as a sharp-witted goth clown. The forgetfulness and lack of following through have to do with low trait conscientiousness, and that can be adjusted the easiest. As for the attention-seeking, that may take some more time because being the class clown/teacher's pet is hard to resist. LoL
Can you do a video explaining Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome?
I already have, hope you find it helpful
@@DarrenFMagee thank you, found it. Do you have any videos on early childhood exposure to sex? Same age and age gaps? Not necessarily in the traditional sense that people usually associate with childhood sexuality being exploratory and gradual, but I mean early intentional, or accidental sexual encounters during childhood. For example I became sexually active around 8 as a result of being around low income kids my age who might have had neglectful or abusive environments (as I did) and I dont seem to find much of any information on the long term effects. All I can really guess is, similar to persistent thumb sucking, it might have a negative impact on the natural progression of emotional and sexual relationships as someone like Freud would explain. like if someone accidentally learned advanced physics before they learned basic math, they're going to struggle in some areas and be hyper involved in others (like maybe sex addiction or struggles with boundaries)
Do you have any videos covering that sort of topic?
So I don’t have anything on that particular topic no. Is it something you’d like me to cover in the future?
@@DarrenFMagee yah that would be awesome :)
it's a sensitive topic people dont like discussing, it makes people feel uneasy when it comes to childhood sexuality in general let alone abuse, so it tends to get completely overshadowed by just intense anger and disgust and social persecution even though it's not necessarily abusive, but an indirect consequence of other forms of neglect and abuse. Like self soothing, which would be particularly attractive for children from chaotic households. Escapism essentially. But then that escapism leads to life long complications with relationships and risky sexual behavior. With the recent changes in political attitudes in places like the US where more and more people seem to be pushing for earlier and earlier sexual education, it's a bit concerning as someone who experienced the fall out of too much, too soon.
Thanks for the speedy reply by the way. Love the videos, you should try and do some collabs or something with Dr K or Dr Ramani, it would be so cool to have entite networks of mental health professionals finally start making a presence where its needed most, online. I appreciate what you do.
This is my husband
Nice explanation, but no word about the causes of the disorder and treatments for histrionics
Easy: They just need to get a grip on reality and understand that they are not the center of the universe! Because unless they do, nothing will work. 😂
I just dropped a post on what’s going on with me and the wife. Basically, a toxic guy who was removed for aggression is now bad mouthing us and even with MASSIVE PROOF, we’re being gas lit.
How do you tell the difference between histrionic personality and narcissistic personality?
they overlap and can be co-morbid. the differences are outlined in dsm-5. hpd just wants to be seen and heard and revels when he's appreciated, npd needs worship and often hates people who dont seem to like him, which doesnt happen with a person with hpd. hpd is kind of a slight narcissist, but only kind of. they're really different disorders, but all cluster b disorders share many common symptoms
No, histrionic PD is a form of narcissistic PD. Narcissism is the title to the wide spectrum of a variety of narcissistic PDs such as histrionic PD.
They are draining.
VERY!!! My mum was one and my godfather is as well. They are the masters of hoovering.
So draining, especially long term.
Makes me think of Bill Murray on “What About Bob?”
I wonder if HPD is also expressed by bi-polar people, especially when they're manic.
Have to be careful - Bi polar isn't a personality disorder, although its symptoms can look like one. Bi polar is classified as one of the "mood disorders". That doesn't mean though that you can't have both. It's one of the challenges for psychologists and psychiatrists. Things like Borderline Personality Disorder can sometimes be mis-diagnosed because they often look like bi polar - and vice versa.
Aren't personality disorders by definition occurring in all situations during one's life? So if they occur exclusively during mania, the behavior probably is more associated with bipolar disorder than a PD
You all make very good points! It‘s the opposite: Histrionics are sometimes bi-polar, but not always. It depends on their life situation and how stable it is.
@@karadiberlinoI am bipolar but I relate to HPD characteristics a lot
Y Narcisistic lying, fraud, manipulation hurt us ...y 🤔 I go through constant feeling of pain coz I feel very helpless n arrested n blocked all my way of feeling free n relaxed ..what we should do when we can't leave the relationship immediately 🤔
How do you tell the difference between a histrionic narcissist and a grandiose?
From my experience, histrionics are usually covert narcissists but they can be grandiose. It‘s just a subform of narcissism that is either one or the other.
Can there be a co-occurrence of narcissism in Histrionics?
Histrionic PD is by definition a subform of narcissistic PD.
The sad thing is females will enable this behaviour on Social Media if you point it out to the male. Say you have issues and encourage the abuser to continue because it’s normal to want to talk to women flirt and do the things people do …The Man sees you as stifling his masculinity which has to be flexed. It’s a no win.
You would never be able to convince anyone it’s abnormal and that the person can’t be self contained.
Always best to walk away.
❤️
Sounds like certain mbti types in particular when they're less healthy. Dominant extravert intuitive/sensor with Introverted feeling as second function
All this describes my ex. He's a Narcopath (Malignant Narsaccist). Omg, I never knew people like him existed.
Good thing you got rid of him.
As a man - this is the main reason i like the idea of a father or brother validating the daughter/sister' new boyfriend/future husband. We men know men and what a stand up man is like and conducts...within a few exchange/interaction. Same goes for women validating sons/brothers new girlfriend...because women know women nature. Plus, we are not dating the guy, have no emotional by-pass when evaluating his character....if anything our standards will be high....because he'll be part of the family/team...and we don't want to bring the team/family down with a 'rotten apple'.
@@kamalvipul9213That‘s a very toxic and incestuous mindset to have! Very sexist as well and to be honest I find your comment utterly disgusting. 😟🤢
I was married to this for many years. I wish that I know this earlier. This is my ex to a T.
I think my ex-spouse may have been like this.
Asian men fit THIS category 🤕thanks intense toxic training from Bollywood 😭
My main issue with all of this is that we seem to rush too much to label people and categorize them. I feel like everyone is different and some personality traits could be inherited or be from how they were raised and or life experiences/traumas.
Slapping a label on someone because they wanted to show off a watch doesn't seem productive to me. Most people crave attention and now the young people are raised on video games they don't get the attention they need and so their attention seeking behaviors can become more dramatic. Also some folks just want to be different and will dress unconventionally to stand out from the crowd more. But none if these thing are negative. They might seem annoying to some people but it's just part of who they are and I don't see it as destructive.
Yeah, nobody is saying someone has HPD because they are wearing a watch lol. As with literally all disorders and afflictions, you have to meet most diagnostic criteria to be diagnosed. Not literally one thing lol. Why make such a weird exaggeration?
And this isn't about them being "annoying" this is about a lot of them being really draining and toxic to the people around them because their life is just a series of performances and them trying to garner as much attention as possible. Not just annoying. Damaging. Very damaging.
Sounds like you missed a lot of the points in this video. Go watch the female one too.
James o brien on lbc bloody hell he constantly uses the pronoun I myself, me or my. I counted and he said a mixture of them 15 times in one minute.
Sounds exactly like a covert narcissist with a new label
They often are! Many of them are grandiose but many of them are covert narcs. Esp when they are all about their image and/or want to come across as a good person. Bigots and hypocrits, often they are hypochondriacs.
Nah a covert narcisist wouldn't be jumping on tables naked etc.. Think of michael scott from the office for Histrionic. I noticed Histrionics also seem to have a much higher capacity for empathy, especially for strangers.
Narcissism?
I know more guys with traveling uteruses than women.
What is a „travelling uterus“?
Hysteria was once thought to be caused by an uterus that was deprives of orgasms.@@karadiberlino
It is very very common nowadays in teens mainly girls for whatever reasons. A nightmare for opposite sex who has no interest or evolves out of such poor dynamics.
A poser
*poseur
Most guys (especially between today's 30's-50's) behave like this.
I would say 40-80.
I don’t see any connection between term ‘histrionic’ and attention seeking behavior.
Use a thesaurus
@@DarrenFMagee common usage doesn’t make logic. Where is your loyalty?
@@DarrenFMagee😂😂😂❤
*wink*
At the end of the day a person is just a person. Don't let people like this ( no offense) try to describe you into a box like your just a definition in a encyclopedia. You are not.
From my experience if you want to know about your self look to the people around you. If you want to know the people around you look at your self. People are not all that different. We all have the same traits on different levels. And just because someone put a bad taste in your mouth or you put a bad taste in there's doesn't mean one of you is a narcissist or any of this other crap they lable. Even mother teresa can be analysed into being a narcissist but that doesn't mean jack. You are a individual not a name. And you are part of a giant family of experiences that shape the world and people on it.
Columbus didn't discover the people of the Americas. Nor did Europe name them. They had already discovered them selves thousands of years before he was born. And just like that you have already discovered your self and the people around you. When a stranger gives you a name or a name to the people around you, don't let that name have power over you. People are not black people are not white yellow or brown. They are people. A slave is a slave because they accept the name and all of the descriptions given to that name for them selves.
Stop looking for some high priest to tell you about your world. Live your life and experience it. Tell your self you matter. We are all made in GOD'S image. That means your neighbor. And that means YOU. Get out there and communicate with the people around YOU... I think you would be surprised that the people so easily put into boxes are actuall people just like you. And that a emotional neutrality towards conversation with someone and boundaries goes a long way to you allowing your self to experience the world around you rather then explain why parts of the world should be sectioned off.
You really need a hobby.
Shut up Richard
Richard, you are correct.
Systematically driving someone mad because of your insane behaviour is a bit more than merely “leaving a bad taste in their mouth” 🤣
Ironically the histrionic male I knew loved putting Me in a box! 😂 Do you preach your sermons to the disordered ones or just their victims?
That sounds like D.J. Trump! -- He blames others for exactly what he is and has been like.
Donald is borderline.