When my gayer side thinks, "Oh, you dizzy boy, you," and then I realize I'd thought that. LOL. I am mostly moderate, still maybe unlearning a lot, and yet, somewhere in my subconscious is this much more comfortable and much gayer side of me that slips out when I don't always know it. Haha. But I think that's maybe the better adjusted, healthier part of me. I still feel I was a little better about being gay, back in high school, and somehow, I went overboard in college and am still undoing the messed up uptightness. (I hope that made any sense at all.) -- Anyway, I liked the spinning, and it also told me I'm cool with Jackson being trans. But I've liked Jackson since I first found Will It Waffle, before he'd transitioned and during and now, so, cool.
A friend saw some pictures of me before I cut my hair and they just commented "you look so sad, so unhappy." And I started crying after they said that, because I was So sad and uncomfortable in that time of my life, and lots of family think I've made a bad decision to cut my hair and start presenting more masculine saying I was happier then. I got that into my head, especially when my mom revels about her "beautiful little girl" *vomit* and so just the acknowledgment that I was clearly not okay then was really amazing
Hey!! I'm a non-binary Individual who's close to starting Testosterone. My current experience is that my dad has been putting off talking about it and most of the time appears uncomfortable if I urge him to find time to take me to an appointment for it. Remember that you are not a burden and you deserve to find what makes yoi feel better. If thats hormones or simply a new name, you shouldn't feel bad for wanting it. Don't let someone's reaction to you dictate how you can and can't live. I've been out for 3 years or so and I've fought my way here, one click away from making an appointment. I just have to keep pushing for it and to be heard. It's hard to fight against people who are uneasy or dislike your transition, but surround ypurself with more welcoming people who can remind you that its not your fault if someone reacts poorly and you are deserving of medical and social respect.
Apathetic Lights I totally relate to all of this. I have been on T for just over a month now but I waited 3+ years to socially transition first and really take my time. I’m 33 and a teacher. The kids have been hella supportive, but the fam is now the biggest obstacle. I really appreciate what you said about not letting others reactions keep you from doing what you need to do for yourself. I have my brothers 1000% support & my mom has concerns but is hella understanding. I have to tell my sister I’ve started T and I’ve never actually come out to my aunt. she made me shave my armpits to go swimming in her pool last summer.... so yeah. Its hard but we have to take care of ourselves. I support you!!!!
@@rwyke1 ❤️❤️❤️❤️ We have to stand up for ourselves because it's never certain who else will stand up for us. I had to leave behind my mother and most of her side of the family because I came out. Keep pushing, I believe that you can do it, you already even started T and that means even if some people don't like you, yoyuve already taken control of yourself and they can't just suck the testosterone out of you and stop it. 😂 Stay safe!
I am new, and 100% in the "can you notice" phase with my close friends and family. 🤣 And my mom noticed my ultra blonde whiskers before I did, so the mom power is too real.
one thing thats super awkward after top surgery is family and friends literally physically leaning over to comment on "ooh your scars are fading well" but like every time im shirtless. like "can you chill lmao", i just wanna be shirtless and not get comments on my scars. relax.
I'm a trans guy and I've almost been 5 months on testosterone. I moved out and haven't seen my pets in like 3 months. I wonder what they're gunna do lmao
Your animals reaction does not change. 100%. I have an 11 year old cat and she didn’t even bat and eye. Nor did my dog who I only see once every few weeks because she lives with my parents. Trust me. Pets know it’s you.
When I started hormones MY CAT WAS COMPLETELY CONFUSED it took about a month for him to chill out. My other cat was fine. I also got a lot of comments (from women) about my facial hair and I would respond that yes it's like im 15. And I stopped getting comments like that cuz yes its puberty thanks for pointing it out. It worked as a good signal that they should stop for me.
I just started on testosterone 5 days ago so this is super relevant to me right now. I love that you posted this. There aren't any other videos talking about reactions to HRT.
omg MOMS I spent my first 2 years on T working in the same (family run close knit) Cabaret Theater that I had started working at 5 months before I started. And all of the mom people commented on my changes constantly. Like, it was a lot and mostly about facial hair
Since you mentioned resources, I think it'd be awesome if you made a video like "Trans People 101." A video that trans people can send to people in their life if they're not in a position to explain everything. Or a place to send people to other resources. Something that covers everything someone who has never been exposed to trans people should know. Great video as always!
Great suggestion! I'd love to make more 101 resources like that at some point. For now, you can show them my TED Talk. In addition to the talk itself, if you click on the tabs at the bottom that say "Reading List" and "Footnotes," I compiled a TON of resources for allies and trans people alike. go.ted.com/jacksonbird
I'm 9 months on T now and I'm definitely the "oversharing" type of person, so I have been very welcoming of all comments and questions from my friends and family. Heck, I have even posted UA-cam videos about it since there aren't a lot of Gen-Xer FTM UA-camrs out there. The only thing that currently irks me is the fact I still don't pass - despite my voice definitely having deepened a lot and the fact I dress and cut my hair in a very masculine way, I still get called "ma'am" by everyone who doesn't know me. The fact that my facial hair is still practically invisible (even if I let it grow out for 2+ weeks) doesn't help any. I look forward to the day when a stranger calls me "sir!"
It took me a few years to consistently pass. I think there's a confirmation bias we see online. Folks who can be read as male quickly on T are more likely to post photos and videos of themselves. The reality is that it can take a lot longer for most of us. Hang in there! I'm gonna check out your videos because I love seeing folks from generations above mine :)
If there's an issue with yoir voice still being a little higher/more androgynous you can look through videos explaing head voices and chest voices. Chest voices are deeper because there's more room for your voice to resonate. Of course you don't have to change anything about rhe way you speak if you don't want to. But if it's bothering you I think voice training is something you could look into that might help you get gendered correctly more often. Until then, its just waiting for all those lovely other changes T gives you and to hope for the best ❤️
@@nylonsghost7938 My voice has started to drop a lot in the last few months, so that's not the issue. The real issue is my body and how curvy I still am. The fat redistribution has started to happen, but my hips/thighs are still way too feminine and there's not a lot I can do to hide it (even with baggy clothing).
My mom noticed my ultra blonde whiskers before I did. 🤣 And from friends/family/coworkers (I'm transitioning openly at work because I like my job and I don't want to quit), I welcome the friendly "oh hey, I noticed [the voice, etc.]" because man, I've worked hard for this. I've also had people genuinely compliment me on the progress and then be like, "oh man, I'm so sorry if that was offensive" and I'm just like, "no, no--THANK YOU." I'm upgrading myself on purpose, glad to know it's showing.
I’m starting T in 8 days - I can barely believe it - so I’m watching all of these videos trying to prepare. Ahhhh im so excited!! But scared!! But excited!!
I'm a very androgynous non-binary person, going towards masculine representation. The only piece of transitioning I did before coming out was cutting my hair. My mom asked me if I was sure it was a girl's haircut. Of course I said yes as I had just minutes before cropped the photo to hide the man's face. Then there were the comments on how pretty I used to be before I cut my hair. I don't think that's a good thing to say whenever someone changes up their hairstyle even if they're not trans in any way. My hair style was also compared to my aunt's, which made me very conscious about it again. I've had it cut again since and now it's okay and I don't obsess over it anymore. After coming out it has been a lot more social, me getting braver to talk about it and advocating for myself, rn in the process of getting a binder, they're all order online and I need parental permission to use my money online even though I have my own debit card. Then there's been some talk about a name change with a couple friends, and there will be a long wait to get double mastectomy, first to be of age and then the whole diagnosis thing. So yeah, I'm still very much at the beginning, but we'll get there in time. I'm sure.
Oooo! Thank you for the "pets may act weird" comment! I'd been wondering about that, and how my cat will react, and how some pets "don't like men/women" and how a non-binary transition will play into that. lol
Thank you for this video. It helped my confidence and I am currently trying to get a gender therapist(FTM). And I am able to wear a tux to my junior prom and it really boosted my confidence that my parents are understanding more. BTW my names Davian and your channel and some others has really helped to to use them as a template to explain me being trans to family.
I’m 2 months on T now and even though I’m out to close friends and family I still go by female pronouns and my birth name bc I can’t decide what I want my new name to be and I don’t know how to ask people to call me something else without it being awkward :/
All my friends are starting hormones before me and my reaction is always just a sobbing mess. I become so overwhelmed with joy for them that I can’t even react properly. Can’t wait till it’s my turn to get those reactions from them.
Jackson Bird is my role model, he is the one who helped me realize I was non-binary, he is the one who makes me THINK about life and about society, he has helped me come out to my family as bisexual and non-binary, he has helped me so much. He will probably never read this, or maybe he will, I don't know, but I just want to say thank you, because no other UA-camr, no other human being has helped me in the way that Jackson Bird has. If someone asked me who I want to be like when I'm an adult, it would be Jackson. So...just thanks, thank you, for creating the content you do, because there is no way for me to express how thankful I am. I'm getting repetitive now, haha, I'll stop. Also, dude, I mean Wolfstar is my OTP.
A long time friend and his wife are over the top happy for me, and both mentioned that I just look and sound happier than they have ever seen. :) That was nice affirmation. Also, the pets comment is totally true: Cats think I am The Best thing to sleep on, and not just mine. Alllll cats. It seems estradiol has given me animal attraction as well as super powers and a clear mind. Thank you Jackson for sharing part of your life. It has helped immensely.
The whole 'not seeing that people change but only seeing it looking back' is so true. I have this friend who had already hit puberty and stopped growing as she entered highschool while I was young for my grade and hadnt had my growth spurt yet. Now she has become the shortest of the entire friendgroup and I got amongst the tallest and we now think it is hilarious that I used to be shorter. It is especially hilarious to the people who have only been with the friend group for two/three years because they can't imagine it having been that way around.
Oh thank god you addressed the pre-t/pre-coming-out stress I appreciate that SO MUCH! I have been on overdrive, hell near panic attack, these past couple weeks worrying about perceptions and how coming out would affect my work and social life and yada yada yada. And I think you’re right-I think coming out AFTER starting T would be best for my peace of mind. So thank you for sharing that nugget of knowledge.
I'm in my second week and I'm super heart on my sleeve! I have been excitedly telling everyone who's in my circle about my brand new pimples and smells.
Thank you, I think I really needed that. I’m hopefully starting hormones in August and I still have to “properly” come out to most of my family. I’m transmasc but on the nonbinary spectrum and I started socially transitioning last year already. Starting with a new name which all of my friends and family know of by now. But only a few know that I use male pronouns (in German) and well, that I am trans. I haven’t really put out the obvious yet I guess haha. Also because it took me a while to really realise what I want and who I truly am.
I was completely out to everyone for several years before I was able to medically transition because I came out when I was 14 or 15 and I've never really had a choice but to be open about being trans coming out during high school. When I started T near the end of junior year I definitely got some weird comments, especially after not seeing a lot of people all summer. It was weird because there were definitely people who said shitty things, but because everyone there had obviously gone through puberty not too long ago a lot of people where also really understanding. Because I started transitioning at 17 I definitely had it way easier than a lot of people who transition earlier because not, 2 years later, I'm at about the same place as my cis peers. It's not weird for a 19 year old cis guy to still have a patchy beard or a bit of a baby face.
A friend recommended your channel and I've been binging it all day. I'm pre-T and you're really helping me work through the doubts and fears I've been stuck in for a while.
Thank you for the very thoughtful exploration of this topic. Transition is wonderful but also very strange and a little scary and having these tools to navigate makes it so much better
Jackson, thank you for this video. Although I'm watching it 3 years or so after you made it, I found so much useful info in it. I'm in the infant stages of my transition (ftm), and reacting to people's reactions is something I def need to think about. So far, I have only come out to a couple of people (besides my therapist). It all gets really overwhelming to think about everything involved in transitioning. Your videos help a lot! I hope all is well with you and, again, thank you for this video.
Wow, thank you so much for this video!! Really useful stuff!!! I thought ftm youtube was something I needed as a baby trans, but this video is exactly what I need as an adult starting transition!! This is super helpful, and makes a lot of sense. Keep up the great work :)
Great video, thanks for creating this! I'm a bit over 3 months on testosterone right now and am kind of the opposite of you tho. I am encouraging my friends and family to point out changes they have noticed. It makes me feel more valid in pointing them out myself, bacause I sometimes feel like I might just be imagining them. I really like it when my friends playfully point out my voice breaks, saying that I would probably be mortified if someone I didn't know all that well point them out!
Yeah, that's the one I was curious about! Your pets thinking you're a different person because of scent for a few days. I have a lot of pets, the biggest currently being cats, and I'd been wondering when I change if they'll still recognize me or if they'll think "Wait.. Who are you?! What did you do with our person?! Where's Shad?! Help!" Also, more importantly, I wanted to ask you guys about how to come out to your parents. I've been hinting to pretty much everyone my entire life that I hate my current gender so much without being blunt about it, but I know none of them expect me to change, so how do I go about telling them without making someone pass out? I unfortunately have very sensitive and kind of old fashioned relatives. My main issue being one of my parents who was so proud to have a daughter but I hate it so much. Everything about being female sucks in my eyes and I've always been a man mentally, I'm just in the wrong skin. But how do I tell my family that? I'm kind of a poor speaker. Writing's so much easier but it'd be kind of weird to hand everyone in your family a letter and then dive behind the couch in case of explosions.
I just started T last week and this vid came out at a good time. For the most part, I am the first person who is trans that my family has met and to be honest I feel a lot of pressure. Mostly because now I have to be transgender spokesperson in my family for the time being
people have recommended me bra styles and tampon brands and it was even more awkward because they didn't know I was trans, they just thought I had short hair and wore more masculine clothes. Who thought that was an okay thing to say to anyone though? it's so weird
I'm trans and mon binary and I've been on hrt for more than a year and I have a bit of facial hair even and I'm still constantly misgendered. I think one of the weirder things is when people I'm around who I never formally came out to just kinda figure out via facebook or whatever. But the weirdest part is when they do when they know. My favorite is when they just use my correct pronouns and then thats it but I've had a few weird pulling me to the side and asking in like the weirdest way possible. The worst is when they just ask in front of everyone and I mean I'm not in the closet really but im not very forthright either. Its just so awkward and I hate being called ma'am constantly. I mean its been a whole year for gods sake and I still get misgendered so much. However (im an afab) I get hit on less often which is a plus for me.
This video is super helpful, thank you. Im currently starting the process to get started on hormones (just had my blood drawn for the first time woo) and only a handful of people know right now that I'm doing this. This addressed a fear I didnt quite have the words to describe so thanks for all the advice!
lol the first time my dog saw me leave my room in a dress and makeup I saw her tilt her head and stare like she didnt recognise me. until I pet her and she realised it was me lol
Thanks, this is just the video I needed. I am super nervous about medically transitioning at my workplace. While I am out to all my coworkers and don't hide my trans identity, I interact with quite a few parents and I never know which parents caught on and see me as a (trans)guy and which ones are oblivious. There is at least one father who I am almost certain still reads me as female (interactions with him are just very from-one-man-to-a-younger-woman, a bit patronizing, touching my shoulder a lot) and I am pretty nervous about how he will react once I start showing clear signs of being on T.
NB who went on T a few years ago now. In my case, something that made it easier to talk about was that 2/3 of my best friend's sons were/are at about that same stage of development in voice cracking and dubious facial hair growth (and the acne). So, it's something that's very easy to discuss openly and have them relate to. Also, wondered out loud at the bestie about why he didn't warn me how itchy bacne can be. 😾
I met up with a trans friend in a comedy workshop but I didn't recognise her. I said "Oh, hi K, nice to meet you" and she said "We've worked together before" and I said "Oh, sorry, I didn't recognise you. You've grown your hair and, uh, other things". I think she was ok but I was mortified,
the part about pets is really true! sadly my dog passed away a few months before i started T but when i got the big hair cut and he saw me for the first time he barked like crazy at me because he didn't recognize me!
One thing I'm kind of worried about is my dog's reaction. I know that sounds a bit weird, but he's a rescue and is very territorial and protective of the family, and doesn't like non-family members *especially men* . I should be starting testosterone at the end of summer, but then I'm also planning to go and work abroad for about four months (continuing HRT while I'm away). So yeah, I'm a little bit worried that I'll come home and he'll go mad and think I'm a stranger
If you can, every couple of weeks while you are away, send a t-shirt you wore that day home to your dog to sleep on :) Just tell your dog sitter it's so the dog does not miss you.
Erika Wright that’s a good idea thank you! He’ll be with my parents and sisters while I’m away, because he’s the family dog, so at least I won’t have to have a weird conversation about sending unwashed clothes home to a dog sitter 😂 He also tends to sleep with a blanket (he has several, he likes to make nests) so I could just tell them to swap it for a shirt. Thanks for your suggestion :)
thanks for all your insight. i have several people in my life doing some transition with gender n i appreciate all the helpful things to say or not say. love your videos and fun merchandise.
Well Jackson, can answer things about various genders on such. Back in the 90s studied up on various transmedicine. In 2001 i strarted transition as a binary transwoman and 20 years later did nonbinary stuff. I really would suggest study up on transmedicine first since endos do not know stuff. My first one completelely did not even realize that ppl need hormones for other stuff and cut off my e so i went to another dr (while missing he should have pointed out it had a medicine conflict) later some stuff caused an energy problem so another dr added a microdose of t, ammusingly was on a discord while ppl asked about what ppl like from e and my answer was my skin after.
I'm nb and I was planning to change my name. And sure the name I chose sounds like a male's name in the country I live in but it's a gender neutral name. And my mother didn't support me. Told me that I will never find a job tlwith this name. I told her I don't want people in my life who don't support me more to call them my family. She doesn't know I'm nb and with the way thing are going I don't think I wanna come out to her. Can't imagine what would happen if I were to take hormones. And this video helps me to keep going and never let anyone to tell me what to be. So glad UA-cam recommended this to me at the right time.
So I'm nonbinary, I haven't transitioned yet, but I'm out to a few close people. Whenever I speculate about going on testosterone (which I'm considering) and getting top surgery (which I really want) my dad gets really worried that I will suffer and doesn't want me to be 'messing with that stuff'. He loves me a lot and had an amazing time with his daughter but I don't know how to help him feel better about all of this.
Remember (and this applies to everyone, not just trans people) that for better or for worse, you are your own worst critic, so don't worry too much about how much people will notice changes in behaviour and physical attributes.
I was about 8, and I came downstairs more than half asleep at about 11 o'clock, asked my mum if I could go to the toilet, and peed on the carpet. '30 years I've been asking permission to piss. I can't squeeze a drop without say-so.'
Hey Jackson Bird: I just discovered that there's actually a Transgender Clinic in Massachusetts and a free legal services on changing names and gender markers the name of this Transgender Healthcare is Fenway Health
"Celebrating Trans Lives" -- iTunes has a button / section up for a selection of movies about trans folks for $4.99 each on sale. I have not seen pretty much any of these, and intend to take a look at two or three. @JacksonBird , I thought you and viewers would be interested. Just saw it, dunno how long it'll be up, and it's way before Pride month.
Drat. I should have copied down the titles of those movies to watch later. The button in iTunes for those is no longer on. They looked interesting. I doubt searching for "celebrating trans lives" will work within iTunes, but I'll try it. -- Jackson, maybe you'd like to do a video on trans movie recommendations, please?
Yesterday my dad said "why don't you just buy a fake beard instead of taking testosterone" and kept enforcing how difficult it is for me to transition. "that's so expensive" "if the therapist says no you can't do it" "they're doing it for the money" "your mother will never understand" excuses excuses excuses
Wow thanks dad yes my problems are solved I'll just get a beard and strap it on and call it a day. As if he knows anything about who I am. He gaslighted me at 15 and stopped me from transitioning for 12 years
I am nonbinary, transmasculine. One of my aunts, whom I had not even seen or talked to in almost a decade, emailed me and asked for "transformation photos" on finding out that I'd transitioned. I responded not so politely. That was a weird one. For the voice changes, most people just asked if I had a cold, and I just said yes and then they never mentioned it again. One friend I had not seen in quite a while noticed IMMEDIATELY as soon as I said hi, and obviously I told her and she was happy for me. I have a couple of friends I can go to and ask if they notice specific things that I get worried about. Otherwise nobody has much commented other than to say I seem a lot happier and more able to be myself. I've been on t for... oh geez. Maybe a year and a half? I don't track it or changes at all.
Someone once told me, off hand that if I went on T, I'd look like Bowie and it was probably the best compliment ever. Wouldn't mind looking like Bowie if I'm honest. I could definitely live like that. That said, still undecided on T.
this is a weird question that you are under ZERO obligation to answer, but do you have people close to you who are autistic or are you autistic yourself? I ask because the way you communicate is SO incredibly autism friendly. I always know what to expect from you, I know what you mean and I feel safe and comforted hearing you talk rather that confused and alert like when a lot of people talk about complex issues. I wish I knew how to better describe this, but i just think it is so amazing. You're my absolute favourite youtuber.
I'm curious too but I don't get that vibe from him, even though I know a ton of trans people are autistic (like myself). Of course everyone is different so maybe he is and I just don't notice.
some feelings that I have about my own transition and hormones because I have nowhere else to talk about it: -I don't really know how to deal with coming out at work, and especially advocate for myself regarding people using my pronouns because I'm nonbinary and use they/them pronouns, and I work with children. I'm mostly out to my coworkers (or at least I'm assuming that they've kind of figured it out by now, and I've told a lot of them), but I don't actually ask people to use my pronouns because of the kids. I don't want to be seen as being forcing some agenda on the kids and risk losing my job over it. Plus, I work with children with developmental disabilities so if any of them questioned why my coworkers were using they pronouns for me, I don't know if I would be able to explain it to them in a way that they could understand -The only change that I would actually want from going on testosterone would be the voice deepening, most everything else I feel fairly neutral about, except for facial and body hair. I really don't want that, but my brother and dad (especially brother) have a lot, and so I'm worried that I would develop a lot of it and quickly. I've considered talking to a doctor to see if I could go on T for just like 6 months until my voice dropped and then stopping, but I'm worried that I would develop body/facial hair too quickly and I would have that before my voice was to where I wanted it to be to stop testosterone
I do know one guy who grew a full mustache at just 5 months. But it really doesn't happen that quickly. It's also based on genetics. Being on T is like being a cis guy. For some trans guys who can't grow beards wouldn't have grown beards even if they were born cis. Does that make sense?
As an enby person considering starting T, I’m really nervous for changes because I know there are some that I’d really like and others that you know I wouldn’t hate but I don’t care for. Also with family members who just think I’m a trans guy in denial, I’m really nervous. How do I explain that yes, this is a path some trans men might take, but that’s not who I am or why I’m doing it? Jdjsj I’m just nervous about people’s reactions
Kerwin and I went to a buffet and I stood waiting for him (ftm) to pay for his meal..The cashier spoke to him thusly:"Yes mam,uh sir,uh mam!" Kerwin kept a strasight face and knew better than to look at me (he had already started taking testosterone and was in a grey area.) It was all I could do not to laugh and the cashier was sooooo embarrassed cause Kerwin would not fit into her little box. Second story; I went into Kerwin's area and he was at his computer. I casually looked at what he was looking at. He looked up at me and said"I went through puberty twice!" I said:"Inded you did." And then I asked THE question...And I got the answer...Same question you get asked...😃
Also, at work once, I had a bunch of customers over time who would do and say things that made me want to crawl into a hole and disappear. One person blurted out, "that's a BOYS name!" pointing out my name tag which thankfully doesn't deadname me, and I wanted to tell them that wasn't my problem, but as usual, I simply said nothing and took their obvious derision in stride. Another person repeatedly refers to be as Darling, dear, dahl, (an ausie expression used to refer to women) others are obviously confused and doubletake over pronouns and forms of address and it all just adds up to awkward. One person at one of my old jobs outright called me out for being a male child and said my mum should be here with me. Super awkward! This liminal space I live in right now can be hell if I focus on it too much. Not sure if anyone shares this experience though.
i could’ve gone SO much longer if she hadn’t discovered the bottle 🙈 my bad but it came at a good time bc i went out if state for 3 days immediately after and she had her meltdown away from me and realized that i was *20 years old* and could literally just leave or get a refill if she took my t
Hey I know it's off topic but I realy Realy need an answer to this: Can anybody here Show me a Trans- Men Who has DID ( diciotiate Identity dissorder) ? Because When you have DID and some of the Alters are female but others are male it's fucking crazy.. can I still be trans? Am I valid If I feel that way? IT would realy help to know someone Who goes through similar shit.. So please tell me if you know a Person with DID Who is also ftm-trans. Thank you! =) And Thank you for the allways helpful content here @Jackson =))
I accidentally told a trans guy “woah your voice dropped harder than my grades”
He laughed but I still feel bad about it
I can’t speak for him, but that sounds genuinely funny and complimentary 😅
LMAOOO I LOVE THIS
Without HRT Christmas is just Cismas
indeed
Mind blown
Smooth
Epic
That is just stupid. I bet you do not even know what CIS/TRANS is or where it comes from or used in.
can't believe you said "welcome to being unrelatable" while spinning around in your chair, i.e. doing one of the most relatable things ever
so unrelatable he doesn't even know what's relatable
I know right! That is my favorite thing to do(especially when I’m procrastinating).
SAME
I found thinking about reactions to other people's reactions quite relatable and interesting, but now I'm confused...
When my gayer side thinks, "Oh, you dizzy boy, you," and then I realize I'd thought that. LOL. I am mostly moderate, still maybe unlearning a lot, and yet, somewhere in my subconscious is this much more comfortable and much gayer side of me that slips out when I don't always know it. Haha. But I think that's maybe the better adjusted, healthier part of me. I still feel I was a little better about being gay, back in high school, and somehow, I went overboard in college and am still undoing the messed up uptightness. (I hope that made any sense at all.) -- Anyway, I liked the spinning, and it also told me I'm cool with Jackson being trans. But I've liked Jackson since I first found Will It Waffle, before he'd transitioned and during and now, so, cool.
A simple “you look happy” would feel great, I’d imagine!
For me, that feels very positive and affirming without feeling like you're under the microscope!
YEAH
So I said to my dad what do you think about trans poeple? "Do whatever you want sweetie."
“You sound sick” has become my life being three months on testosterone
A friend saw some pictures of me before I cut my hair and they just commented "you look so sad, so unhappy." And I started crying after they said that, because I was So sad and uncomfortable in that time of my life, and lots of family think I've made a bad decision to cut my hair and start presenting more masculine saying I was happier then. I got that into my head, especially when my mom revels about her "beautiful little girl" *vomit* and so just the acknowledgment that I was clearly not okay then was really amazing
You know if you weren't happy or not. If you weren't, it doesn't matter what your family says. You weren't happy
Hey!! I'm a non-binary Individual who's close to starting Testosterone. My current experience is that my dad has been putting off talking about it and most of the time appears uncomfortable if I urge him to find time to take me to an appointment for it. Remember that you are not a burden and you deserve to find what makes yoi feel better. If thats hormones or simply a new name, you shouldn't feel bad for wanting it. Don't let someone's reaction to you dictate how you can and can't live.
I've been out for 3 years or so and I've fought my way here, one click away from making an appointment. I just have to keep pushing for it and to be heard. It's hard to fight against people who are uneasy or dislike your transition, but surround ypurself with more welcoming people who can remind you that its not your fault if someone reacts poorly and you are deserving of medical and social respect.
Apathetic Lights I totally relate to all of this. I have been on T for just over a month now but I waited 3+ years to socially transition first and really take my time. I’m 33 and a teacher. The kids have been hella supportive, but the fam is now the biggest obstacle. I really appreciate what you said about not letting others reactions keep you from doing what you need to do for yourself. I have my brothers 1000% support & my mom has concerns but is hella understanding. I have to tell my sister I’ve started T and I’ve never actually come out to my aunt. she made me shave my armpits to go swimming in her pool last summer.... so yeah. Its hard but we have to take care of ourselves. I support you!!!!
@@rwyke1 ❤️❤️❤️❤️ We have to stand up for ourselves because it's never certain who else will stand up for us. I had to leave behind my mother and most of her side of the family because I came out. Keep pushing, I believe that you can do it, you already even started T and that means even if some people don't like you, yoyuve already taken control of yourself and they can't just suck the testosterone out of you and stop it. 😂
Stay safe!
I’m so glad to see another non-binary person who’s starting testosterone as well
That's so cool! I'm non-binary and would love to someday start Testosterone. I admire you!
I'm non-binary, I'm not allowed to bind, are there other ways to help with the dysphoria I feel about my chest?
Honestly your channel is still one of the positive trans spaces on UA-cam. So thanks for being awesome.
I am new, and 100% in the "can you notice" phase with my close friends and family. 🤣 And my mom noticed my ultra blonde whiskers before I did, so the mom power is too real.
Ben Smith the mom power can overpower anything, even the excited trans guy senses
one thing thats super awkward after top surgery is family and friends literally physically leaning over to comment on "ooh your scars are fading well" but like every time im shirtless.
like "can you chill lmao", i just wanna be shirtless and not get comments on my scars. relax.
Yes they are. Any idea when your social awkwardness will start to fade?
I'm a trans guy and I've almost been 5 months on testosterone. I moved out and haven't seen my pets in like 3 months. I wonder what they're gunna do lmao
Your pets will not recognize your sent because T changes it. Just spend time and let them get used to you being around so they know the true you.
Dc24kong _ Uhh, no? Animals have eyes and ears, they don’t solely rely on smell to recognize people lmao.
I know they don’t solely rely on smell. They just wont recognize you at first.
Your animals reaction does not change. 100%. I have an 11 year old cat and she didn’t even bat and eye. Nor did my dog who I only see once every few weeks because she lives with my parents. Trust me. Pets know it’s you.
@@melissadomagala5576 Your smell does change. That's a fact
When I started hormones MY CAT WAS COMPLETELY CONFUSED it took about a month for him to chill out. My other cat was fine. I also got a lot of comments (from women) about my facial hair and I would respond that yes it's like im 15. And I stopped getting comments like that cuz yes its puberty thanks for pointing it out. It worked as a good signal that they should stop for me.
The confused cat is featured in my pic btw.
I just started on testosterone 5 days ago so this is super relevant to me right now. I love that you posted this. There aren't any other videos talking about reactions to HRT.
Congratulations!!
Congrats man
@@nikhansen8775 Thank you!
@@davianlafountain9032 Thank you!
Congrats! That’s awesome dude! ❤️
omg MOMS
I spent my first 2 years on T working in the same (family run close knit) Cabaret Theater that I had started working at 5 months before I started.
And all of the mom people commented on my changes constantly.
Like, it was a lot
and mostly about facial hair
"Welcome to being unrelatableee" *immediately does the most relatable thing I've ever seen by getting dizzy from spinning in a swivel chair*
Since you mentioned resources, I think it'd be awesome if you made a video like "Trans People 101." A video that trans people can send to people in their life if they're not in a position to explain everything. Or a place to send people to other resources. Something that covers everything someone who has never been exposed to trans people should know.
Great video as always!
Great suggestion! I'd love to make more 101 resources like that at some point. For now, you can show them my TED Talk. In addition to the talk itself, if you click on the tabs at the bottom that say "Reading List" and "Footnotes," I compiled a TON of resources for allies and trans people alike. go.ted.com/jacksonbird
@@jackisnotabird Great! I forgot you had a TED Talk, but that is pretty awesome! Thanks!
Love your eyebrows
I've just stared at them for the whole video
I'm 9 months on T now and I'm definitely the "oversharing" type of person, so I have been very welcoming of all comments and questions from my friends and family. Heck, I have even posted UA-cam videos about it since there aren't a lot of Gen-Xer FTM UA-camrs out there. The only thing that currently irks me is the fact I still don't pass - despite my voice definitely having deepened a lot and the fact I dress and cut my hair in a very masculine way, I still get called "ma'am" by everyone who doesn't know me. The fact that my facial hair is still practically invisible (even if I let it grow out for 2+ weeks) doesn't help any. I look forward to the day when a stranger calls me "sir!"
It took me a few years to consistently pass. I think there's a confirmation bias we see online. Folks who can be read as male quickly on T are more likely to post photos and videos of themselves. The reality is that it can take a lot longer for most of us. Hang in there! I'm gonna check out your videos because I love seeing folks from generations above mine :)
If there's an issue with yoir voice still being a little higher/more androgynous you can look through videos explaing head voices and chest voices.
Chest voices are deeper because there's more room for your voice to resonate.
Of course you don't have to change anything about rhe way you speak if you don't want to. But if it's bothering you I think voice training is something you could look into that might help you get gendered correctly more often. Until then, its just waiting for all those lovely other changes T gives you and to hope for the best ❤️
@@nylonsghost7938 My voice has started to drop a lot in the last few months, so that's not the issue. The real issue is my body and how curvy I still am. The fat redistribution has started to happen, but my hips/thighs are still way too feminine and there's not a lot I can do to hide it (even with baggy clothing).
@@Kleineganz Oh damn alright. Then it's just a waiting game and I wish you the best!
My mom noticed my ultra blonde whiskers before I did. 🤣 And from friends/family/coworkers (I'm transitioning openly at work because I like my job and I don't want to quit), I welcome the friendly "oh hey, I noticed [the voice, etc.]" because man, I've worked hard for this.
I've also had people genuinely compliment me on the progress and then be like, "oh man, I'm so sorry if that was offensive" and I'm just like, "no, no--THANK YOU." I'm upgrading myself on purpose, glad to know it's showing.
I never thought I could love watching someone talking about their sponsor that much
I’m starting T in 8 days - I can barely believe it - so I’m watching all of these videos trying to prepare. Ahhhh im so excited!! But scared!! But excited!!
Aye, how's the T going?
I'm a very androgynous non-binary person, going towards masculine representation. The only piece of transitioning I did before coming out was cutting my hair. My mom asked me if I was sure it was a girl's haircut. Of course I said yes as I had just minutes before cropped the photo to hide the man's face. Then there were the comments on how pretty I used to be before I cut my hair. I don't think that's a good thing to say whenever someone changes up their hairstyle even if they're not trans in any way. My hair style was also compared to my aunt's, which made me very conscious about it again. I've had it cut again since and now it's okay and I don't obsess over it anymore. After coming out it has been a lot more social, me getting braver to talk about it and advocating for myself, rn in the process of getting a binder, they're all order online and I need parental permission to use my money online even though I have my own debit card. Then there's been some talk about a name change with a couple friends, and there will be a long wait to get double mastectomy, first to be of age and then the whole diagnosis thing. So yeah, I'm still very much at the beginning, but we'll get there in time. I'm sure.
Oooo! Thank you for the "pets may act weird" comment! I'd been wondering about that, and how my cat will react, and how some pets "don't like men/women" and how a non-binary transition will play into that. lol
Thank you for this video. It helped my confidence and I am currently trying to get a gender therapist(FTM). And I am able to wear a tux to my junior prom and it really boosted my confidence that my parents are understanding more. BTW my names Davian and your channel and some others has really helped to to use them as a template to explain me being trans to family.
Also I’ve been out for over a year and my friends are the main support system
I'm really happy for you! Much love from another trans dude :)
Omg I literally was in a terrible mental breakdown and just by watching ur videos I became feeling like much better, I'm so freaking thankful
I’m 2 months on T now and even though I’m out to close friends and family I still go by female pronouns and my birth name bc I can’t decide what I want my new name to be and I don’t know how to ask people to call me something else without it being awkward :/
All my friends are starting hormones before me and my reaction is always just a sobbing mess. I become so overwhelmed with joy for them that I can’t even react properly. Can’t wait till it’s my turn to get those reactions from them.
I feel you, did you get your turn yet?
How's it going?
Jackson Bird is my role model, he is the one who helped me realize I was non-binary, he is the one who makes me THINK about life and about society, he has helped me come out to my family as bisexual and non-binary, he has helped me so much. He will probably never read this, or maybe he will, I don't know, but I just want to say thank you, because no other UA-camr, no other human being has helped me in the way that Jackson Bird has. If someone asked me who I want to be like when I'm an adult, it would be Jackson. So...just thanks, thank you, for creating the content you do, because there is no way for me to express how thankful I am.
I'm getting repetitive now, haha, I'll stop.
Also, dude, I mean Wolfstar is my OTP.
A long time friend and his wife are over the top happy for me, and both mentioned that I just look and sound happier than they have ever seen. :) That was nice affirmation. Also, the pets comment is totally true: Cats think I am The Best thing to sleep on, and not just mine. Alllll cats. It seems estradiol has given me animal attraction as well as super powers and a clear mind. Thank you Jackson for sharing part of your life. It has helped immensely.
Cat attraction is just one of the many super powers estradiol has given me. :D
The whole 'not seeing that people change but only seeing it looking back' is so true. I have this friend who had already hit puberty and stopped growing as she entered highschool while I was young for my grade and hadnt had my growth spurt yet. Now she has become the shortest of the entire friendgroup and I got amongst the tallest and we now think it is hilarious that I used to be shorter. It is especially hilarious to the people who have only been with the friend group for two/three years because they can't imagine it having been that way around.
You are the first to talk about how pets react to changes. I have been wondering about that.
Oh thank god you addressed the pre-t/pre-coming-out stress I appreciate that SO MUCH! I have been on overdrive, hell near panic attack, these past couple weeks worrying about perceptions and how coming out would affect my work and social life and yada yada yada. And I think you’re right-I think coming out AFTER starting T would be best for my peace of mind. So thank you for sharing that nugget of knowledge.
I'm in my second week and I'm super heart on my sleeve! I have been excitedly telling everyone who's in my circle about my brand new pimples and smells.
MOMS.*oof* Mom-types are awkward. Especially the actual mom.
Great vid as always, Jackson, look at all the people in these comments feeling seen 🙂
Thank you, I think I really needed that. I’m hopefully starting hormones in August and I still have to “properly” come out to most of my family. I’m transmasc but on the nonbinary spectrum and I started socially transitioning last year already. Starting with a new name which all of my friends and family know of by now. But only a few know that I use male pronouns (in German) and well, that I am trans. I haven’t really put out the obvious yet I guess haha. Also because it took me a while to really realise what I want and who I truly am.
The “oh that made me dizzy” after saying how unrelatable it was, was the more relatable thing in the world.
I was completely out to everyone for several years before I was able to medically transition because I came out when I was 14 or 15 and I've never really had a choice but to be open about being trans coming out during high school. When I started T near the end of junior year I definitely got some weird comments, especially after not seeing a lot of people all summer.
It was weird because there were definitely people who said shitty things, but because everyone there had obviously gone through puberty not too long ago a lot of people where also really understanding. Because I started transitioning at 17 I definitely had it way easier than a lot of people who transition earlier because not, 2 years later, I'm at about the same place as my cis peers. It's not weird for a 19 year old cis guy to still have a patchy beard or a bit of a baby face.
If you ever get dizzy from spinning, just spin the other way a couple of times and you won't be dizzy anymore
A friend recommended your channel and I've been binging it all day. I'm pre-T and you're really helping me work through the doubts and fears I've been stuck in for a while.
Thank you for the very thoughtful exploration of this topic. Transition is wonderful but also very strange and a little scary and having these tools to navigate makes it so much better
I just started T today so this is perfect
CONGRATS !!!!!
me: trying to present more masculinely
nice person walking by: hello beautiful lady!
me: than- awww fuck
Jackson, thank you for this video. Although I'm watching it 3 years or so after you made it, I found so much useful info in it. I'm in the infant stages of my transition (ftm), and reacting to people's reactions is something I def need to think about. So far, I have only come out to a couple of people (besides my therapist). It all gets really overwhelming to think about everything involved in transitioning. Your videos help a lot! I hope all is well with you and, again, thank you for this video.
Wow, thank you so much for this video!! Really useful stuff!!! I thought ftm youtube was something I needed as a baby trans, but this video is exactly what I need as an adult starting transition!! This is super helpful, and makes a lot of sense. Keep up the great work :)
Great video, thanks for creating this! I'm a bit over 3 months on testosterone right now and am kind of the opposite of you tho. I am encouraging my friends and family to point out changes they have noticed. It makes me feel more valid in pointing them out myself, bacause I sometimes feel like I might just be imagining them. I really like it when my friends playfully point out my voice breaks, saying that I would probably be mortified if someone I didn't know all that well point them out!
Perfect timing! I got my prescription literally on Monday
My friends all agree I'm much happier after coming out so hopefully they'll notice how happy I'll be on T
How is it going?
@@Mango-cz2st I get to start T on the 29th
Yeah, that's the one I was curious about! Your pets thinking you're a different person because of scent for a few days. I have a lot of pets, the biggest currently being cats, and I'd been wondering when I change if they'll still recognize me or if they'll think "Wait.. Who are you?! What did you do with our person?! Where's Shad?! Help!"
Also, more importantly, I wanted to ask you guys about how to come out to your parents. I've been hinting to pretty much everyone my entire life that I hate my current gender so much without being blunt about it, but I know none of them expect me to change, so how do I go about telling them without making someone pass out? I unfortunately have very sensitive and kind of old fashioned relatives. My main issue being one of my parents who was so proud to have a daughter but I hate it so much. Everything about being female sucks in my eyes and I've always been a man mentally, I'm just in the wrong skin. But how do I tell my family that? I'm kind of a poor speaker. Writing's so much easier but it'd be kind of weird to hand everyone in your family a letter and then dive behind the couch in case of explosions.
i might start t this year, and i can't help but be so SO scared about people's reactions.
Figuring out wether to shave my legs or what to wear at formal events is the worst thing
I just started T last week and this vid came out at a good time. For the most part, I am the first person who is trans that my family has met and to be honest I feel a lot of pressure. Mostly because now I have to be transgender spokesperson in my family for the time being
people have recommended me bra styles and tampon brands and it was even more awkward because they didn't know I was trans, they just thought I had short hair and wore more masculine clothes. Who thought that was an okay thing to say to anyone though? it's so weird
I do feel like my cats noticed! Omg nobody else ever commented on that kind of thing, I thought it was only my impression lolol
I'm trans and mon binary and I've been on hrt for more than a year and I have a bit of facial hair even and I'm still constantly misgendered. I think one of the weirder things is when people I'm around who I never formally came out to just kinda figure out via facebook or whatever. But the weirdest part is when they do when they know. My favorite is when they just use my correct pronouns and then thats it but I've had a few weird pulling me to the side and asking in like the weirdest way possible. The worst is when they just ask in front of everyone and I mean I'm not in the closet really but im not very forthright either. Its just so awkward and I hate being called ma'am constantly. I mean its been a whole year for gods sake and I still get misgendered so much. However (im an afab) I get hit on less often which is a plus for me.
This video is super helpful, thank you. Im currently starting the process to get started on hormones (just had my blood drawn for the first time woo) and only a handful of people know right now that I'm doing this. This addressed a fear I didnt quite have the words to describe so thanks for all the advice!
lol the first time my dog saw me leave my room in a dress and makeup I saw her tilt her head and stare like she didnt recognise me. until I pet her and she realised it was me lol
Jack: "Welcome to being unrelatable!"
*chairspin*
"Oh, that made me dizzy..."
Me: *relates hard*
Does anyone else try to take a picture of their mustache hairs? You see them there but can never get a good shot of them 😂
Thanks, this is just the video I needed. I am super nervous about medically transitioning at my workplace. While I am out to all my coworkers and don't hide my trans identity, I interact with quite a few parents and I never know which parents caught on and see me as a (trans)guy and which ones are oblivious. There is at least one father who I am almost certain still reads me as female (interactions with him are just very from-one-man-to-a-younger-woman, a bit patronizing, touching my shoulder a lot) and I am pretty nervous about how he will react once I start showing clear signs of being on T.
NB who went on T a few years ago now. In my case, something that made it easier to talk about was that 2/3 of my best friend's sons were/are at about that same stage of development in voice cracking and dubious facial hair growth (and the acne). So, it's something that's very easy to discuss openly and have them relate to. Also, wondered out loud at the bestie about why he didn't warn me how itchy bacne can be. 😾
I know this video is 2 years old but I resently figured out that I'm agender and am trying to figyer out were I go from here.
I met up with a trans friend in a comedy workshop but I didn't recognise her. I said "Oh, hi K, nice to meet you" and she said "We've worked together before" and I said "Oh, sorry, I didn't recognise you. You've grown your hair and, uh, other things". I think she was ok but I was mortified,
the part about pets is really true! sadly my dog passed away a few months before i started T but when i got the big hair cut and he saw me for the first time he barked like crazy at me because he didn't recognize me!
One thing I'm kind of worried about is my dog's reaction. I know that sounds a bit weird, but he's a rescue and is very territorial and protective of the family, and doesn't like non-family members *especially men* . I should be starting testosterone at the end of summer, but then I'm also planning to go and work abroad for about four months (continuing HRT while I'm away). So yeah, I'm a little bit worried that I'll come home and he'll go mad and think I'm a stranger
If you can, every couple of weeks while you are away, send a t-shirt you wore that day home to your dog to sleep on :) Just tell your dog sitter it's so the dog does not miss you.
Erika Wright that’s a good idea thank you! He’ll be with my parents and sisters while I’m away, because he’s the family dog, so at least I won’t have to have a weird conversation about sending unwashed clothes home to a dog sitter 😂 He also tends to sleep with a blanket (he has several, he likes to make nests) so I could just tell them to swap it for a shirt. Thanks for your suggestion :)
@@lucasmannion8787 I am happy to help, and happy for you.
@@lucasmannion8787 Also, checkout susans.org if you have not found it already. Hugs!
You are always cool to me another good video take care till your next video
thanks for all your insight. i have several people in my life doing some transition with gender n i appreciate all the helpful things to say or not say. love your videos and fun merchandise.
I'm not going on HRT but I will be getting surgeries. Good video nonetheless. Thanks Jackson!
I’m pre T and my family is already coming with rude comments that makes me cry ...
That would probably be most of my family if I came out to more than a handful.
I super appreciate this video! Thanks for talking about this 😊
This is a good topic thank you for covering it!
Oh my, you are so wonderful. Thank you so much for these videos!!
Well Jackson, can answer things about various genders on such. Back in the 90s studied up on various transmedicine. In 2001 i strarted transition as a binary transwoman and 20 years later did nonbinary stuff. I really would suggest study up on transmedicine first since endos do not know stuff. My first one completelely did not even realize that ppl need hormones for other stuff and cut off my e so i went to another dr (while missing he should have pointed out it had a medicine conflict) later some stuff caused an energy problem so another dr added a microdose of t, ammusingly was on a discord while ppl asked about what ppl like from e and my answer was my skin after.
I'm nb and I was planning to change my name. And sure the name I chose sounds like a male's name in the country I live in but it's a gender neutral name. And my mother didn't support me. Told me that I will never find a job tlwith this name. I told her I don't want people in my life who don't support me more to call them my family. She doesn't know I'm nb and with the way thing are going I don't think I wanna come out to her.
Can't imagine what would happen if I were to take hormones.
And this video helps me to keep going and never let anyone to tell me what to be. So glad UA-cam recommended this to me at the right time.
Somehow I only just now noticed your eyes and I'm just captivated
question? how can I get a binder without having a personal account, im too scared to ask my parents right now, but chest dysphoria really sucks?
So I'm nonbinary, I haven't transitioned yet, but I'm out to a few close people. Whenever I speculate about going on testosterone (which I'm considering) and getting top surgery (which I really want) my dad gets really worried that I will suffer and doesn't want me to be 'messing with that stuff'. He loves me a lot and had an amazing time with his daughter but I don't know how to help him feel better about all of this.
I had to go to the hospital with my son for weeks when I saw my dog for the first time she was confused I had a beard lol
Hopfully I'll be on testronone soon. I'm currently 20 I'm a trans man ftm who is currently pre- T.
Remember (and this applies to everyone, not just trans people) that for better or for worse, you are your own worst critic, so don't worry too much about how much people will notice changes in behaviour and physical attributes.
my favorite reaction was when i went over to my friend's house and his sister went "oh wow, your balls really dropped!" upon hearing my voice
9:18 Yes. I'm open about things because I'm so awkward. Earlier today I randomly brought up the last time I peed myself as a talking point.
I was about 8, and I came downstairs more than half asleep at about 11 o'clock, asked my mum if I could go to the toilet, and peed on the carpet.
'30 years I've been asking permission to piss. I can't squeeze a drop without say-so.'
Hey Jackson Bird: I just discovered that there's actually a Transgender Clinic in Massachusetts and a free legal services on changing names and gender markers the name of this Transgender Healthcare is Fenway Health
I’m out at work but not really much with my family. We’re not that close and we don’t live near each other.
your hair looks so soft ^^
"Celebrating Trans Lives" -- iTunes has a button / section up for a selection of movies about trans folks for $4.99 each on sale. I have not seen pretty much any of these, and intend to take a look at two or three. @JacksonBird , I thought you and viewers would be interested. Just saw it, dunno how long it'll be up, and it's way before Pride month.
Drat. I should have copied down the titles of those movies to watch later. The button in iTunes for those is no longer on. They looked interesting. I doubt searching for "celebrating trans lives" will work within iTunes, but I'll try it. -- Jackson, maybe you'd like to do a video on trans movie recommendations, please?
Him: I'm going to talk about trans people ourselves reacting to other people's reactions to starting hrt
My brain: _______________________________
Yesterday my dad said "why don't you just buy a fake beard instead of taking testosterone" and kept enforcing how difficult it is for me to transition. "that's so expensive" "if the therapist says no you can't do it" "they're doing it for the money" "your mother will never understand" excuses excuses excuses
Wow thanks dad yes my problems are solved I'll just get a beard and strap it on and call it a day. As if he knows anything about who I am. He gaslighted me at 15 and stopped me from transitioning for 12 years
I am nonbinary, transmasculine. One of my aunts, whom I had not even seen or talked to in almost a decade, emailed me and asked for "transformation photos" on finding out that I'd transitioned. I responded not so politely. That was a weird one. For the voice changes, most people just asked if I had a cold, and I just said yes and then they never mentioned it again. One friend I had not seen in quite a while noticed IMMEDIATELY as soon as I said hi, and obviously I told her and she was happy for me. I have a couple of friends I can go to and ask if they notice specific things that I get worried about. Otherwise nobody has much commented other than to say I seem a lot happier and more able to be myself. I've been on t for... oh geez. Maybe a year and a half? I don't track it or changes at all.
Someone once told me, off hand that if I went on T, I'd look like Bowie and it was probably the best compliment ever. Wouldn't mind looking like Bowie if I'm honest. I could definitely live like that. That said, still undecided on T.
this is a weird question that you are under ZERO obligation to answer, but do you have people close to you who are autistic or are you autistic yourself? I ask because the way you communicate is SO incredibly autism friendly. I always know what to expect from you, I know what you mean and I feel safe and comforted hearing you talk rather that confused and alert like when a lot of people talk about complex issues. I wish I knew how to better describe this, but i just think it is so amazing. You're my absolute favourite youtuber.
I'm curious too but I don't get that vibe from him, even though I know a ton of trans people are autistic (like myself). Of course everyone is different so maybe he is and I just don't notice.
I also love the way he communicates and explains things. it's really cool
I never told my job an no one said anything about it one coworker ask why i sound deep but i sed just do. Besides that i haven't had anything
some feelings that I have about my own transition and hormones because I have nowhere else to talk about it:
-I don't really know how to deal with coming out at work, and especially advocate for myself regarding people using my pronouns because I'm nonbinary and use they/them pronouns, and I work with children. I'm mostly out to my coworkers (or at least I'm assuming that they've kind of figured it out by now, and I've told a lot of them), but I don't actually ask people to use my pronouns because of the kids. I don't want to be seen as being forcing some agenda on the kids and risk losing my job over it. Plus, I work with children with developmental disabilities so if any of them questioned why my coworkers were using they pronouns for me, I don't know if I would be able to explain it to them in a way that they could understand
-The only change that I would actually want from going on testosterone would be the voice deepening, most everything else I feel fairly neutral about, except for facial and body hair. I really don't want that, but my brother and dad (especially brother) have a lot, and so I'm worried that I would develop a lot of it and quickly. I've considered talking to a doctor to see if I could go on T for just like 6 months until my voice dropped and then stopping, but I'm worried that I would develop body/facial hair too quickly and I would have that before my voice was to where I wanted it to be to stop testosterone
I do know one guy who grew a full mustache at just 5 months. But it really doesn't happen that quickly. It's also based on genetics. Being on T is like being a cis guy. For some trans guys who can't grow beards wouldn't have grown beards even if they were born cis. Does that make sense?
As an enby person considering starting T, I’m really nervous for changes because I know there are some that I’d really like and others that you know I wouldn’t hate but I don’t care for. Also with family members who just think I’m a trans guy in denial, I’m really nervous. How do I explain that yes, this is a path some trans men might take, but that’s not who I am or why I’m doing it? Jdjsj I’m just nervous about people’s reactions
Kerwin and I went to a buffet and I stood waiting for him (ftm) to pay for his meal..The cashier spoke to him thusly:"Yes mam,uh sir,uh mam!"
Kerwin kept a strasight face and knew better than to look at me (he had already started taking testosterone and was in a grey area.) It was all I could do not to laugh and the cashier was sooooo embarrassed cause Kerwin would not fit into her little box.
Second story; I went into Kerwin's area and he was at his computer. I casually looked at what he was looking at. He looked up at me and said"I went through puberty twice!" I said:"Inded you did." And then I asked THE question...And I got the answer...Same question you get asked...😃
I'm nervous how people will treat me if I keep my long hair but start taking hrt. Like if they wouldn't take me as seriously
Also, at work once, I had a bunch of customers over time who would do and say things that made me want to crawl into a hole and disappear. One person blurted out, "that's a BOYS name!" pointing out my name tag which thankfully doesn't deadname me, and I wanted to tell them that wasn't my problem, but as usual, I simply said nothing and took their obvious derision in stride. Another person repeatedly refers to be as Darling, dear, dahl, (an ausie expression used to refer to women) others are obviously confused and doubletake over pronouns and forms of address and it all just adds up to awkward. One person at one of my old jobs outright called me out for being a male child and said my mum should be here with me. Super awkward! This liminal space I live in right now can be hell if I focus on it too much. Not sure if anyone shares this experience though.
LOL i got to like 7 months on testosterone before my mom found out sbsvsvsbsh
i could’ve gone SO much longer if she hadn’t discovered the bottle 🙈 my bad but it came at a good time bc i went out if state for 3 days immediately after and she had her meltdown away from me and realized that i was *20 years old* and could literally just leave or get a refill if she took my t
Very helpful my therapist was telling me to ask trans guys what to do how to deal with transphobia
Hey I know it's off topic but I realy Realy need an answer to this:
Can anybody here Show me a Trans- Men Who has DID ( diciotiate Identity dissorder) ? Because
When you have DID and some of the Alters are female but others are male it's fucking crazy.. can I still be trans? Am I valid If I feel that way? IT would realy help to know someone Who goes through similar shit.. So please tell me if you know a Person with DID Who is also ftm-trans.
Thank you! =)
And Thank you for the allways helpful content here @Jackson =))
Why’d u at me like this... yes I did tell everyone I know bout the little dirt stache I’m growing lol