You speak truth in depth. So interesting , intelligent, learned, captivating and heart felt. A true expert and unforgettable. I watch all your videos from start to finish. You have made me strong after suffering at the hands of a Narcissist, who took all my dreams away, with financial abuse. Thank you for this great support to carry on and believe it was not me.
I relate to very single thing you said, even down to him telling me "jokingly" more times than I want to remember/admit, "Just do what I say & you'll be alright." It was never a joke. Soul mates - ha.
@@empress_highpriestess3307 Live and let live, Seek the light and forgive. For there are countless fish in the sea, And newfound love can set your ❤️ free.
@@integratedmonk5947 Thank you. This will help me to accept my choice to follow my narcissistic partner yo his country in order to be with him. I truly loved him at the time and felt leaving my country was right thing to do. Best regards. Best wishes.
Once again, an in-depth look into the narcissist’s mind. Your lectures leave me speechless! Thank you for validating the victims of narcissistic abuse and helping us understand why it all happened the way it did.
I am so thankful to have found you. The past months have been an eye opening experience for me. I realized I am a victim of narcissistic abuse,to extreme levels. In the meantime I became mother to a now 5 month old son. I am now in the so called discard phase. He abused me and started a smear campaign against me while I was at my most vulnerable, right after birth. using my weak mental state also due to hormonal changes caused by hashimoto and my sleep deprivation,triggering me,getting extreme reactions,filming me constantly and wanting to frame me as the crazy one. i could have never imagined it would develop like this...He is my biggest nightmare, and I am still in love with him. Its just crazy what this does to you. I feel also helpless because I need to be strong now for my little baby. And here psychologists dont really take the problem seriously.
Blah, blah, blah... By the way, you confess your own: -unbearable mood changes -agressivity, hostility It's sounds like crazy behavior to be. Just look at his videos: if you look and sound like crazy on them, then you're probalbly the crazy one.
This video was eye opening. Many of the statements in the video were strikingly similar to things I have heard. When I began questioning the relationship and ask specific questions, I was asked “who is giving you advice? Who are you listening to?”. When I questioned about the money and inquired as to where it was going for decades, he replied “you could have looked whenever you wanted”. When I asked for a separation to allow us to get individual therapy (couples therapy was a nightmare), he said “no separation; only divorce. Why would I get separated for you to see your life could be better without me”? Thanks to Sam, I realized what I wanted my entire life was to feel wanted, accepted. I tried to be perfect to get the love for which I yearned. His idealization of me provided what I needed and I was the mother he never had…we fit like a hand in a glove until I began unraveling myself. 3 years of therapy and I’m still learning.
"He" thought I needed to be Baker Acted. "He" says I have multiple personality disorder. He said that about his first wife. He thinks I have mental issues caused by my medication. But, I simply left him. Got an apartment. Got a different car. Go to work. Don't want to talk to him.
Oh yes He put me on the pedestal and after 8 months of fantasy the pedestal landed on top of me xxx I couldn’t even hold the spoon correctly in my hand . Thank you professor
Wish I could attend your seminars - love your work and watch hundreds of your videos. Husband of 22 years is covert narcissist and your info is giving me strength to make an escape plan. Thank you!
thanx again, i really like the depth you go into and it is very well explained, the intricate details and dynamics. I wish much success with the seminar and i'm sure it will be very educating and insightful.
This is shockingly accurate how my narc saw me in the beginning. I couldn’t do anything wrong. Now, I can’t do anything right. I’m getting what I can out of him while getting a plan. He can F*ck off. Wasted my time. He has to be left with himself forever so guess what?? I win! 😃
I know your story because I lived it. All those years you tried. The things that made you love him that were 'good' were worth the time it took to try to get them to 'understand' how normal people act & how to be an mf-ing human being. But, before you know it, years, decades pass and you find you're a shell of the person you used to be. Keep up the good fight & stay the course with that plan. I've had him out of my life a couple of years now & while I had thought I'd washed my hands to men, am now happily with the man who double dated with myself & the ex-narc at prom in high school. And, I took the S.O.B. to the cleaners in the divorce - so there is some frontier justice to he had. Every last one of them are cowardly, socially awkward, pathetic renditions of human beings.
@@justagirlandherphone thanks! Trying to stay the course and good for you! I hope to meet a REAL man someday not the child that is the narc, but I’m with you, I have a lot of brainwashing to reverse after this mess of a relationship. I won’t dive into anything right away because I need time to recover after this traumatic mind f*ck spell I FINALLY realized was happening to me! Yes, living in their insecure, selfish, compulsive lying bodies is punishment enough for me. I can escape him and recover but he’s stuck with himself FOREVER!!! Haha!! If you look at it that way, you’ll see there is justice after a narcissistic abusive relationship after all! 🤣 Glad to know I’m not alone in fighting for my life. ♥️
Wow!! This is exactly what he tells me when I say I want more affection from him he says I should be happy that he brings me out spends money takes me to eat that should be enough what else do I want?!!
Move on love if he doesn't care you become a dead mother to him. Small enough to put in a match box 📦 . he won't love you neither does narcissist loves themselves but you can. Self love is powerful make up your mind and end the nightmare .
Omg!! 😳. That is exactly how he was with all the pictures he took of me on his phone and then using some FB app to reface them or whatever .. Just wow!!!
Sam Vaknin, your videos are so elaborate and helpful . I appreciate your insight and explanation of the narcissist. I also like your explanation of narcissists confabulation - believing their Own lies and how psychopaths gaslight- they know they are lying . Is it still possible for a narcissist to do both???
No. Altough psychopaths may have narcissist traits, narcissists (=fantasy-oriented, reality distortion) are not psychopaths (=goal-oriented, less reality distortion, see others as tools).
I WILL GET OUT OF YOUR WAY .. AND LET YOU DO WHAT YOU DO WITH THE GREATEST EASE AND ELOQUENCE .. ALWAYS GIVING US IN DEPTH CUTTING EDGE KNOWLEDGE FOUND NO WHERE ELSE .. WHO CAN FORGET YOUR GIFT .. FILLED WITH ALL THE ATTRIBUTES OF HUMOR AND INTELLIGENT INSIGHT .. I LOVE EVERY SESSION LIVED LISTENING AT THE SEAT OF YOUR SOUL .. ALWAYS YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN THAT I FEEL INVIGORATED AND EMPOWERED TO CARRY ON THIS PATH OF RECOVERY .. ALWAYS .. REMAIN THE PR0F .. B .. X P.P.S .. ALL THE VERY BEST AT THE SEMINAR IN BUDAPEST .. ANTICIPATING CATCHING THAT SEMINAR ON YOU TUBE IN THE FUTURE .. T'CARE .. X
Sam, how it would be the relation (friendship if you call it like that) between a sociopath and a narcissist? or between a psychopath and a narcissist? Thank you for your videos!
Get out of my head!! 🤪 Okay, just kidding... 🥺 I was never codependent until now. He's worn me out. I lost my job. I have my own apartment to safeguard against his instability and rages. And I can't even bring myself to open the drapes at his house much less escape his vortex which I used to easily do... I went to his territory, I mean place, to get caught up on my laundry and the next thing I know I'm in the Hotel California Twilight Zone. I wonder what will become of me; I have survived so far...
:-( This seminar is unfortunately not free, according to the organizer. Exciting syllabus, though, hope to see it some day on UA-cam. Greetings from Budapest
You speak truth in depth. So interesting , intelligent, learned, captivating and heart felt. A true expert and unforgettable. I watch all your videos from start to finish. You have made me strong after suffering at the hands of a Narcissist, who took all my dreams away, with financial abuse. Thank you for this great support to carry on and believe it was not me.
I relate to very single thing you said, even down to him telling me "jokingly" more times than I want to remember/admit, "Just do what I say & you'll be alright." It was never a joke. Soul mates - ha.
Preach ! ❤
It’s better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all ❤️
@@empress_highpriestess3307
Live and let live,
Seek the light and forgive.
For there are countless fish in the sea,
And newfound love can set your ❤️ free.
The snapshot thing is friggin scary man!!! We are just humans too. But also how sad for them that they need us to feel anything 🤣
@@integratedmonk5947 Thank you. This will help me to accept my choice to follow my narcissistic partner yo his country in order to be with him. I truly loved him at the time and felt leaving my country was right thing to do. Best regards. Best wishes.
Once again, an in-depth look into the narcissist’s mind. Your lectures leave me speechless! Thank you for validating the victims of narcissistic abuse and helping us understand why it all happened the way it did.
I am so thankful to have found you. The past months have been an eye opening experience for me. I realized I am a victim of narcissistic abuse,to extreme levels. In the meantime I became mother to a now 5 month old son. I am now in the so called discard phase. He abused me and started a smear campaign against me while I was at my most vulnerable, right after birth. using my weak mental state also due to hormonal changes caused by hashimoto and my sleep deprivation,triggering me,getting extreme reactions,filming me constantly and wanting to frame me as the crazy one. i could have never imagined it would develop like this...He is my biggest nightmare, and I am still in love with him. Its just crazy what this does to you. I feel also helpless because I need to be strong now for my little baby. And here psychologists dont really take the problem seriously.
Blah, blah, blah...
By the way, you confess your own:
-unbearable mood changes
-agressivity, hostility
It's sounds like crazy behavior to be. Just look at his videos: if you look and sound like crazy on them, then you're probalbly the crazy one.
@@Joy-zn2lo you have facebook?
@@nervifanatiquedemicheldrac902 sure.
@@nervifanatiquedemicheldrac902 you must know me.who said I have unbearable mood changes. Actually the opposite.
@@alison-palomadalessandro7342 ok nutcase
This is saving my life right now. Thank you!
This video was eye opening. Many of the statements in the video were strikingly similar to things I have heard. When I began questioning the relationship and ask specific questions, I was asked “who is giving you advice? Who are you listening to?”. When I questioned about the money and inquired as to where it was going for decades, he replied “you could have looked whenever you wanted”. When I asked for a separation to allow us to get individual therapy (couples therapy was a nightmare), he said “no separation; only divorce. Why would I get separated for you to see your life could be better without me”? Thanks to Sam, I realized what I wanted my entire life was to feel wanted, accepted. I tried to be perfect to get the love for which I yearned. His idealization of me provided what I needed and I was the mother he never had…we fit like a hand in a glove until I began unraveling myself. 3 years of therapy and I’m still learning.
"He" thought I needed to be Baker Acted. "He" says I have multiple personality disorder. He said that about his first wife. He thinks I have mental issues caused by my medication. But, I simply left him. Got an apartment. Got a different car. Go to work. Don't want to talk to him.
Et voilà. Bravo : )
Anyone who's not a psychiatrist and label you with any psychiatric definition, is an idiot and a terrible person.
Oh yes
He put me on the pedestal and after 8 months of fantasy the pedestal landed on top of me xxx
I couldn’t even hold the spoon correctly in my hand .
Thank you professor
1. he was too nice
2. You behaved like s**t
3. He punished you
Voilà.
Wish I could attend your seminars - love your work and watch hundreds of your videos. Husband of 22 years is covert narcissist and your info is giving me strength to make an escape plan. Thank you!
Thank you for articulating this. Your videos are very therapeutic and empowering.
"empowering" bahhahahaha
I figure Sam Vaknin vomiting every time he reads a comment like yours
@@nervifanatiquedemicheldrac902 how so? Or are you simply discounting and discrediting another person's lived experience?
@@bellaevidencias Yep
Thankyou so much for all your teachings , you don't realise how much you have saved my sanity and I am glad I found you on here . 🙏
I needed to hear this. thank you ❤️
We heard a lot about narcisist we need to know how to protect and prevent our children to be so and grow healthy
1. Don't neglect them.
2. Don't over-protect them, let them learn and live.
3. Provide for them, but don't expect any accomplishment in return.
thanx again, i really like the depth you go into and it is very well explained, the intricate details and dynamics.
I wish much success with the seminar and i'm sure it will be very educating and insightful.
Thank you Prof. for explaining about this in a very in depth yet easily digestible way.
Sam, your understanding of and explanation of Narcissism is amazing. Thank you for your work!😃💕🙏🏼📚📖✏️
I was born in Budapest. Most of my relatives are there. You will love Budapest if you have not been there before!
This is spot on!
This is shockingly accurate how my narc saw me in the beginning. I couldn’t do anything wrong. Now, I can’t do anything right. I’m getting what I can out of him while getting a plan. He can F*ck off. Wasted my time. He has to be left with himself forever so guess what?? I win! 😃
I know your story because I lived it. All those years you tried. The things that made you love him that were 'good' were worth the time it took to try to get them to 'understand' how normal people act & how to be an mf-ing human being.
But, before you know it, years, decades pass and you find you're a shell of the person you used to be.
Keep up the good fight & stay the course with that plan. I've had him out of my life a couple of years now & while I had thought I'd washed my hands to men, am now happily with the man who double dated with myself & the ex-narc at prom in high school.
And, I took the S.O.B. to the cleaners in the divorce - so there is some frontier justice to he had.
Every last one of them are cowardly, socially awkward, pathetic renditions of human beings.
@@justagirlandherphone thanks! Trying to stay the course and good for you! I hope to meet a REAL man someday not the child that is the narc, but I’m with you, I have a lot of brainwashing to reverse after this mess of a relationship. I won’t dive into anything right away because I need time to recover after this traumatic mind f*ck spell I FINALLY realized was happening to me! Yes, living in their insecure, selfish, compulsive lying bodies is punishment enough for me. I can escape him and recover but he’s stuck with himself FOREVER!!! Haha!! If you look at it that way, you’ll see there is justice after a narcissistic abusive relationship after all! 🤣 Glad to know I’m not alone in fighting for my life. ♥️
@@jackie8448 So, you're a greedy rat with no dignity. Congratulations.
@@narcoholic22 We often get what we deserve in life.
Wow Dr Vaknin that's me and my ex who I have just recently managed to break free from after 14 yrs. I appreciate your work.
All chick's exes are narcissistic nowadays XD XD
@@nervifanatiquedemicheldrac902 I don't know about other chick's but certainly do know about my lived reality and experience
@@Margaret__B In which ways did he prevent you from leaving him before?
Wow!! This is exactly what he tells me when I say I want more affection from him he says I should be happy that he brings me out spends money takes me to eat that should be enough what else do I want?!!
Move on love if he doesn't care you become a dead mother to him. Small enough to put in a match box 📦 . he won't love you neither does narcissist loves themselves but you can. Self love is powerful make up your mind and end the nightmare .
@@AnnA-tu3ig Sorry to hear. The right person will find you in good spirit and mind. Just leave first.
On the other hand, do YOU give him enough affection?
@@nervifanatiquedemicheldrac902why give love anymore to a narcisist when they can't receive it and can't give it .
@@alwaysjolly You don't know wheter he really has narcissistic disorder or not. Maybe SHE has.
Thanks for Sharing!
Thank you, Dr. Vaknin, for clarification on my dream come true (RME). I look forward to the seminar in Budapest.
I'm P from Jamaica 🇯🇲 MR VASKIM UR the best 👌
Omg!! 😳. That is exactly how he was with all the pictures he took of me on his phone and then using some FB app to reface them or whatever .. Just wow!!!
Thank you
Sam Vaknin, your videos are so elaborate and helpful . I appreciate your insight and explanation of the narcissist. I also like your explanation of narcissists confabulation - believing their Own lies and how psychopaths gaslight- they know they are lying . Is it still possible for a narcissist to do both???
No. Altough psychopaths may have narcissist traits, narcissists (=fantasy-oriented, reality distortion) are not psychopaths (=goal-oriented, less reality distortion, see others as tools).
I WILL GET OUT OF YOUR WAY .. AND LET YOU DO WHAT YOU DO WITH THE GREATEST EASE AND ELOQUENCE .. ALWAYS GIVING US IN DEPTH CUTTING EDGE KNOWLEDGE FOUND NO WHERE ELSE .. WHO CAN FORGET YOUR GIFT .. FILLED WITH ALL THE ATTRIBUTES OF HUMOR AND INTELLIGENT INSIGHT .. I LOVE EVERY SESSION LIVED LISTENING AT THE SEAT OF YOUR SOUL .. ALWAYS YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN THAT I FEEL INVIGORATED AND EMPOWERED TO CARRY ON THIS PATH OF RECOVERY .. ALWAYS .. REMAIN THE PR0F .. B .. X P.P.S .. ALL THE VERY BEST AT THE SEMINAR IN BUDAPEST .. ANTICIPATING CATCHING THAT SEMINAR ON YOU TUBE IN THE FUTURE .. T'CARE .. X
Profound!
U r genuine 💛 ❤ luv from india she try to jelous me but I don't react at all
Perfect title 👌
Sam, how it would be the relation (friendship if you call it like that) between a sociopath and a narcissist? or between a psychopath and a narcissist?
Thank you for your videos!
Quite disappointing, I d say
Get out of my head!! 🤪 Okay, just kidding... 🥺
I was never codependent until now. He's worn me out. I lost my job. I have my own apartment to safeguard against his instability and rages. And I can't even bring myself to open the drapes at his house much less escape his vortex which I used to easily do...
I went to his territory, I mean place, to get caught up on my laundry and the next thing I know I'm in the Hotel California Twilight Zone. I wonder what will become of me; I have survived so far...
please run whilst you still have some soul in you......run...
@@mwizcha7713Thank you for your words of wisdom. I am slowly strengthening my resolve. I hope I'm not simply gaslighting myself
-Rages.
-You're getting nuts and lost your job.
He's obviously malevolent, he wants you captive and submissive. RUN.
I love youuuuuuuuuu ❤️❤️❤️
Hello are you doing one on one therapies by chance ? And if so may I sign up ?
:-( This seminar is unfortunately not free, according to the organizer. Exciting syllabus, though, hope to see it some day on UA-cam. Greetings from Budapest
I am participating for free. I was not aware that the organizer is charging. It is going to be on UA-cam.
Will the seminar be posted online?
Yes.
The seminar is not free of charge. You should pay 100 euros to register.
I will look into it. I am not charging for my participation.
I contacted Barbara’s and she is asking 100 euros through PayPal. For seminar. I’m confused Sam !
I will look into it. I am not charging for my participation.
@@samvaknin thank you….. I can forward email if needed.
Could you please talk more about Putin and his narcissism?
Exactly,listen keep your women racist,I'll keep my industries,..fair?....
he wasted all of his energy.