10 Strategies for Overcoming Childhood Neglect

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  • Опубліковано 21 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 249

  • @kaylasspiritualblog2028
    @kaylasspiritualblog2028 2 роки тому +251

    I hate that I have to parent myself as an adult. That i have to validate myself with touch to feel loved. That i have to look up ways to stand up for myself and that it had to be this way... I'm so tired of it and wasn't ready to enter the real world with so many childhood wounds. Not only that I'm the only one that really gets it.. communicating these wounds with others they count it off as insignificant

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +13

      Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

    • @talitabotana6992
      @talitabotana6992 Рік тому +24

      If you wanna someone to Talk to I'll be more than happy.
      I am going through the same and think people like us could feel more understood and cared for if we can call talk about it and share our experiences between us.
      Send you a hug from Spain ❣️

    • @artsydoll888
      @artsydoll888 Рік тому +26

      Wow I feel the same way. I hate that I have to do all this work as an adult because I wasn't loved properly.

    • @aubrie_morgan
      @aubrie_morgan Рік тому +6

      Same here 😔

    • @SofiUk0319
      @SofiUk0319 Рік тому +9

      I love your words, they hit me particularly hard today.. it will never be right that it is now up to us to change and move forward. I can't stand hearing just those words sometimes, because the depth of the pain is beyond than well you need to just move forward now . Thank you and God bless ❤️

  • @noturbo
    @noturbo 2 роки тому +171

    I get resentful as a kid i got abused and as an adult i have to work 10 times harder than others just to get to where they are-the gift that just keeps on giving.

    • @trysmarter1014
      @trysmarter1014 2 роки тому +24

      I get that way, but then I look at the little ones- I SEE the little ones, how half sized, adorable, and vulnerable they are- I think of what I went through at their age- I can't imagine them going through what I went through.
      I think of what they've been spared from, and I'm grateful, so (expletive deleted) grateful.
      Our efforts to correct our dysfunctional childhood programing will ripple onwards into the future and change the outcomes for generations to come, if we're lucky.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +5

      Thanks for watching.

    • @TopNotchV
      @TopNotchV 2 роки тому +7

      🙏 Thank you for creating this content to help heal the collective 🌠

    • @chesterini
      @chesterini 2 роки тому

      @@trysmarter1014 iooiiiiih oyyyy iiiiipiiis is ithe a time time I o ihoihiiiihiiioiiiiiihihiooiiiiijiuiiiiiiihîuu gu ioiiuiiiioiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiioouu

    • @chesterini
      @chesterini 2 роки тому

      @@trysmarter1014 ookk@@999887))?8888809

  • @ED-lc8qk
    @ED-lc8qk 2 роки тому +97

    I cried almost the entire video. I thought I was over it. I'm not mad at my mom, but the damage it caused was huge. Just venting....

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +9

      You may want to explore this with a professional counselor. You can find other therapists via Psychology Today search:
      allceus.com/Psychology_Today_Therapist_Search
      If you are interested in Virtual EMDR therapy:
      allceus.com/Virtual_EMDR
      Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

    • @kosovir
      @kosovir 2 роки тому +1

      oh please, stop it.

    • @talitabotana6992
      @talitabotana6992 Рік тому +10

      @@kosovir ?

    • @CynthiaSchoenbauer
      @CynthiaSchoenbauer Рік тому +5

      This is sooo good. When you cry because you're recognizing what and who was not there for you, you are touching the child. You can do a lot in that place to make up for what you did not get! I am in the same situation and when I pay attention, there is someone inside who breathes a sigh and says "thank you, finally!"

    • @toby7582
      @toby7582 Рік тому +3

      It took me about 9 minute to break.
      I've been homeless on and off for about 30 years thanks in no part to coming from an abusive family.

  • @gwortman3515
    @gwortman3515 2 роки тому +46

    I experienced severe physical abuse along with neglect...my childhood was a traumatic nightmare...I forgave my parents yet at 61 still have PTSD and can get triggered when I see a child or animal neglected....it's a gut wrenching surge of emotions for me!!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +2

      Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

    • @gwortman3515
      @gwortman3515 2 роки тому +2

      @@DocSnipes your videos really help me to better understand the root causes of why I turned out to be who I am and measures to take to better understand and heal myself. The healing process for me never stops.

    • @julieannmaloney7187
      @julieannmaloney7187 Рік тому +2

      Me too

    • @ceterisparibus8966
      @ceterisparibus8966 11 місяців тому

      ​@@gwortman3515 You have a lot more work to do, it looks like. I wish you well.

    • @gothope5915
      @gothope5915 5 місяців тому +1

      Keep healing, imagine if you were as unaware as you used to be. I'm encouraged that at 61 you are still moving forward.

  • @Exodus26.13Pi
    @Exodus26.13Pi 2 роки тому +69

    When I imagine my kids being treated like I was makes me irate. How could adults care so little and screaming is not problem solving.
    Thanks for letting me vent. Love y'all

    • @WackadoodleMalarkey
      @WackadoodleMalarkey 2 роки тому +5

      Nothing but anything boils my blood faster than optics looking like parents dumping their own shortfalls on their children. I hear ya bud

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +3

      Thanks for watching.

    • @kosovir
      @kosovir 2 роки тому

      you're not showing compassion. you're not better than anyone else, you're blind.

    • @Exodus26.13Pi
      @Exodus26.13Pi 2 роки тому +2

      @@kosovir I always ask for forgiveness and love them. I still would ring their necks.

    • @KimJilene
      @KimJilene 11 місяців тому

      Screaming is not problem solving - PREACH 🙌🏾 Too many of us were subject to this kind of explosive parenting on the regular. Now we have to pick up the pieces of this damaging type of communication and re-teach ourselves how to communicate effectively. It is hard work but we can get there 🦾

  • @esthermoriarty1378
    @esthermoriarty1378 9 місяців тому +10

    I’m 41 and am just realizing what it is that’s been my issue/s all my life, I thought I had a personality disorder or just emotionally detached, but the more I listen about CEN, this explains a lot about my entire life!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  9 місяців тому +2

      I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video

  • @umchileanywaysso
    @umchileanywaysso 2 місяці тому +2

    Doctor snipes, you're the ONLY doctor on youtube who goes really in deoth and makes the necessary long videos for us who need help. Thank you so much. You're really a blessing in my life ❤ you have truly helped me so much ❤ ive been following you from 2023 when i needed it the most and im very grateful I found your channel❤

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 місяці тому

      Thank you so much for your kind words! I’m truly honored to hear that the content has been helpful for you, especially during such a critical time in your life. It means the world to me to know that these in-depth videos are making a difference. I believe that complex topics, like childhood neglect, deserve the time and attention to truly explore them, and I’m glad the longer format resonates with you.
      I’m so grateful to have you as part of this community and that you’ve found support through the channel. Your journey is important, and I’m here to continue providing insights and strategies to help along the way. Thank you for your support and for sharing your experience-it truly motivates me to keep going!

  • @lsmithgoose
    @lsmithgoose 2 роки тому +51

    I needed this, a lot. I very much appreciate this. I am almost 29, better late than never, and want to stop the cycle.
    Thank you

    • @unknownfem9450
      @unknownfem9450 2 роки тому +7

      Always said this. Better late than never.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +3

      Thanks for watching.

    • @CynthiaSchoenbauer
      @CynthiaSchoenbauer Рік тому +3

      Almost 67 and much better late than never. A lot of years of pain can be turned around. It's what we came here to do anyway... so might as well do it while we are here.

    • @lsmithgoose
      @lsmithgoose Рік тому

      @Babs Kaz

    • @harrydijkshoorn6399
      @harrydijkshoorn6399 6 місяців тому

      29 is young to be aware of this. Well done!

  • @jenoop60045
    @jenoop60045 2 роки тому +14

    Thank you, I feel very blessed to have gotten the opportunity to see this video. 🙏 💝

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +2

      Thanks for watching.

  • @PS-xb9hc
    @PS-xb9hc 2 роки тому +9

    I am in therapy and been workimg on this for a year now but every now and then there are days were the resentment gets back to me and makes so sad. At least now I allow myself to feel the pain, cry a bit and move on little by little. But it takes a lot of my energy not to want to abandon myself.

  • @forensicbadassprofiling
    @forensicbadassprofiling 2 роки тому +10

    Thank you Dr S!
    The damage of parental neglect and abuse is life altering n extremely difficult to heal from.
    It requires daily discipline n a recovery team.
    Ur lucky if uve survived the physical.
    The damage is beyond bruises n stitches that eventually heal.
    Parents should be held accountable in criminal Court.
    I grew up w repulsive conditions while these people smile to The world that look like pillars in the community.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      I truly appreciate you watching!

  • @lucianogiudice8569
    @lucianogiudice8569 11 місяців тому +4

    What can I say....Neglected, sexually abused by a stranger, physically abused and beaten up regularly, emotionally blackmailed by my mother and invalidated by my father.
    A psychologist dream.
    After many UA-cam videos, I am just starting to make sense of my childhood experience and where I am today.
    They say what doesn't break you down makes you stronger, not sure about that, but better to be aware of how and who we are, than wondering in the emotional world without a clue.
    Yes it is very painful, especially for someone that was born with very high expectation from himself (Capricorn).
    If I can take one single advise from this wonderful video as the most important, is assertiveness and been able to communicate our emotions and needs openly.
    Yes it will be a hit and miss with people reaction, but it will be great for my self-esteem.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  11 місяців тому +2

      I am sorry your childhood was so traumatic and I appreciate you watching the video and sharing

    • @KimJilene
      @KimJilene 11 місяців тому

      Your comment really resonated with me. My heart goes out to you for all the awful experiences you have been through. You are a survivor and a fighter and I don’t know you but I am sending positive vibes out to you and I am ROOTING FOR YOU. We can get through the pain and anguish and be stronger and better for it. It is part of our story and our journey to being the wonderful people we are destined to be. ❤😊

    • @lucianogiudice8569
      @lucianogiudice8569 11 місяців тому

      @@KimJilene Thank you Kim, if it can be of any help trough out my research for help, I found that mindfulness and meditation does wonders, I belive I have a borderline personality disorder and CBT therapy can also help a lot, other tools are familiarising with the concept of Sadow (Carl Jung) and Sadowork, and try to get rid of addictions. I hope you find some pace on your life and get back you self estime. Love L

    • @harrydijkshoorn6399
      @harrydijkshoorn6399 6 місяців тому

      Bless you.

  • @BookWorm2369
    @BookWorm2369 2 роки тому +9

    Thank you. This was exactly what I googled not too long ago, "how to overcome childhood emotional neglect"

  • @jennasparks3404
    @jennasparks3404 2 роки тому +16

    Thank you so much for this presentation, it is extremely helpful. Can you do a video for adult survivors overcoming childhood neglect, as parents, to parent their children in a healthy way, opposite from childhood neglect?
    Thank you again, your words are powerful and bring awareness.

  • @kd4465
    @kd4465 Рік тому +10

    I’m so glad to have come across this video, it’s extremely validating. I have definitely been abandoning myself, and it’s time to take care of me. Thank you 💕

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому +1

      You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild

  • @yolisamsomi1130
    @yolisamsomi1130 7 місяців тому +1

    When I feel my inner child coming to the surface, I take a mental health day and I listen to a playlist with some of the most comforting songs I've ever heard. The second verse really speaks to me.
    "Troubled little angel
    Inconsistent, flying blind most of the time
    Don't know who to be, yeah
    Always rearranging the
    Wreckage of her life
    Ever holding tight
    To the hope that she'll be free"

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  7 місяців тому

      Awww. I love that. Thank you for watching the video and for sharing

  • @ShonnaNelsonWilliams
    @ShonnaNelsonWilliams 2 роки тому +18

    Thank you so much. 🙏 You really understand our pain. You've pointed out things I need to continually work on to be a better person. I know I'll battle with the trauma for the rest of my life, but now I have the tools to accept it and grow.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +5

      So glad my videos are helpful to you. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

  • @equalityforall5620
    @equalityforall5620 2 роки тому +14

    She is so great. I wish I had heard this years ago. Thank youy so much for putting the time into this.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Very welcome. Thanks for watching.

  • @patriciamorgan2501
    @patriciamorgan2501 2 роки тому +22

    Doc Snipes, this training is awesome. Excellent examples and use of real life situations!

  • @MelanieSchuurman-vanRossum
    @MelanieSchuurman-vanRossum 9 місяців тому +1

    Thank you for this clear presentation about how to overcome emotional neglect. ❤

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  8 місяців тому

      You’re most welcome. Thanks for watching

  • @annied4084
    @annied4084 2 роки тому +5

    On the spot addressing such complex issue on a short span of time.

  • @birdlynn417
    @birdlynn417 Рік тому +7

    I am age 63 now, still affected by childhood neglect and family who never gets together, we left each other alone all these years. The only time the six of us (kids) got together after we left home was when my mother died in 2017. Never again. This was very good, thank you, but it triggers up a lot of yucky feelings even to this day.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You’re so welcome. I am sorry the video triggered unpleasant memories and I appreciate you watching it. What did you find most useful from it?

  • @rosakova08
    @rosakova08 Рік тому +5

    Thank you for sharing this knowledge. Learning about childhood emotional neglect from a tiktok video felt revelatory...I'm trying to learn all I can about its impacts and ways to overcome it now so I can stop feeling so bad all the time, and I appreciate that you put this out here to help others on the same journey.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching the video. What strategies will you use first to overcome childhood neglect? Here are some videos on the inner child: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild

  • @djjustice3244
    @djjustice3244 2 роки тому +4

    THANK YOU DR SNIPES, I'M SAVING THIS ON ALL MY PLAYLIST

  • @kingaberlakovich5585
    @kingaberlakovich5585 2 роки тому +6

    I was a child from divorced parents. My mother had to bring up 3 kids. She worked 12 hours a day and also on Saturdays. We were alone. A lot. And than she became depression and panic attacks, as the middle child ( I was the elder of 2 daughters), I had to take care of my younger sister, of my mother. I was 12! We were not allowed to say no, my mom wanted me to read her mind … i love her but that was not funny and easy. As an adult I also have 3 kids, but I am a stay at home mom ( I think I try to heal my wounds this way), but I also get depression and panic attacks. I am now in therapy. I hope a find my way and a fulfilling relationship.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      I appreciate you watching. Other videos that might help can be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild and ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=CPTSD

  • @kymc8578
    @kymc8578 Рік тому +3

    Thanks for this video. I am now married to someone that is just like my mom. Invalidates feelings, etc. understanding that this happening as it did when I was a child, gives me a very different perspective. I know now I have to find my nurturing parent in myself. It’s really hard, but this helps.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому +1

      Sorry to hear that. I appreciate you watching the video

  • @yinmaysoe7140
    @yinmaysoe7140 2 роки тому +5

    Thank you so much for this video. It makes me aware that it's time to heal my inner child.

  • @harrisongirl1541
    @harrisongirl1541 2 роки тому +3

    Thanks for the road map, I have needed it for so long. Now finding the route in my own way

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Glad I could help. Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

  • @EzequielSanucci
    @EzequielSanucci Рік тому +4

    Excellent presentation! Thank you so much!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You’re so welcome. I appreciate you watching the video. What did you find most helpful from it?

  • @bpassion4fashion581
    @bpassion4fashion581 Рік тому +2

    Thank you for this video . After much searching I found you. I couldn’t believe that this is not talked about more in depth by others.
    I have been on a healing journey for over 25 years. I still struggle with the impact of not being physically and emotionally protected. When you finally said the words “ physically safety “ I was relieved. I experience poverty, neglect in every possible form and shape and although I understand that my mother was traumatized herself, but forgiving our parents doesn’t help to resolve the anguish and bodily terror that I feel when confronting the world and “ adults matters” as in some areas I feel incapacitated / not capable / damaged/ missing the “ how to.”
    I took many notes, so that I can actually do some of the exercises you mentioned on this video - for example , I love to journal so I will journal about my needs back then, the grieve of what never was and my most pressing issue -the physical safety I didn’t get.
    Please make more videos on how can we create safety as adults ?!!!
    Thank you!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You’re so welcome. I am grateful to be of help and I appreciate you watching the video. What did you find most useful from it?
      Here are the videos on safety: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=safety

    • @bpassion4fashion581
      @bpassion4fashion581 Рік тому

      @@DocSnipes what I found most useful was to put name to the many things that remain in the “ invisible world “. Terms such as “ lack of physical safety “ and “ the child’s safety need “ that was huge for me to hear, as no one has ever acknowledged how traumatizing fending for y that can be when being so young and vulnerable .
      Other things like the parent “ not being physically available.” That went straight to my heart bc my mom was never around for no apparent reason. She didn’t drank , nor was an addict of any kind , but now that I know better and studied psychology myself , I know she was disassociated all the time. At this point is not about blaming , but putting name to the invisible wounds so I can continue the process of healing. How could anyone grieve if there is no name for what happened ?!
      Since your video , I have done some inner work with the help of my journal and the extra chair and I now have hope that I can shake up and release the energy of terror in my body.
      I’ll tell you this , yesterday was the first time I was able to see my terrified little girl as separate from the adult me . I still don’t know what am
      I going to do to provide her with safety bc my fantasy was that a man would give me that. Needless to say, I haven’t been that lucky !
      But seeing her for the first time helped with the flow of communication between the two parts of the psych.
      Thank you 🙏 please make more videos like this for childhood neglected children . It is the wound no one can’t see !

  • @zonefreakman
    @zonefreakman Рік тому +2

    That is really interesting. I have talked with a therapist quite a lot and have done mental health programs, but I feel like still learned something from watching this. One thing that clicked for me watching this is realizing how I never felt like I had any help, like no one cared about me. And that has made me feel like I can't have any assurance that things will work out for me. I was even getting to the point of thinking that it's a good thing that no one cares about me because then I could learn to look after myself. I have learned that it's important to be responsible for myself, but I still have those feelings that I would never get any help if I needed it, and that can create anxiety for me and paralyze me sometimes into shutting down and avoiding problems.
    But I think that is really extreme thinking I picked up from my parents who have their own mental health problems. I think that if I became sick or needed help with something for some reason, that there would be someone available to help me to get through it. I would do the same for someone I cared about, so there should be someone who cares about me like that. That paralyzing anxiety I've had since childhood I think also made me believe that I am incapable of looking after myself and that I couldn't become a responsible self regulating adult. But that really was just an unhealthy mindset I learned from my parents. At every step of taking better care of myself and being more responsible I am always surprised that things just work out, as if it were some sort of miracle, rather than an outcome that is supposed to be the norm.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      Thank you for watching and for sharing

    • @KimJilene
      @KimJilene 11 місяців тому

      Loved your comment. I have become fiercely independent too because I learned from a young age that I could not count on my parents due to their inconsistent behaviour. Despite not relying on anyone, I never really took care of myself and because a people pleaser to help everyone else. I made myself small to appease my parents growing up and I continued to do that in adulthood. I am now learning to stand up for myself and advocate for myself so I can live more authentically for me.

  • @ItsSoarTime
    @ItsSoarTime Рік тому

    lord have mercy!!! i thought i had issues! and i do! but...my God!!!!!!!!!! THIS could have been me!!!! and now i've met the male me and hearing this woman talk about THIS PAIN is just...breaking my heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i may as well just allow myself to cry though i am VERY GRATEFUL for this BEGINNING to my understanding of this pain!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      Thank you for watching the video and for sharing

  • @Nandaksilva
    @Nandaksilva 2 роки тому +4

    Thank you! 🙏🏻It has helped me to notice some steps that I had not followed yet to get the healing I need.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

  • @G_14440
    @G_14440 2 роки тому +5

    Thank you for this healing and informative message.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Welcome. Thanks for watching.

  • @Луноцвет
    @Луноцвет 2 роки тому +8

    I can't thank you enough for this. So clear and validating.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Glad it was helpful! Thanks for watching.

  • @_black_is_black_
    @_black_is_black_ 10 місяців тому

    I am very grateful for youtube and doctors like you for making these videos. They are very healing. Thank you for the work you do.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  10 місяців тому

      You’re most welcome. Thank you for watching the video

  • @ksailor71
    @ksailor71 Рік тому +5

    I didn’t even accept I was neglected until my 40’s when I had my first child. My emotional dependence on my mother was so powerful that I was unable to see it. The consequences for me is the inability to maintain enduring relationships 😞

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      I am so sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video. Here is the video on healing the wounded inner child: ua-cam.com/video/IKJPtpaNP2A/v-deo.htmlsi=_nP_R6ZZbp94XGrc

  • @queenbean5573
    @queenbean5573 2 роки тому +3

    @Doc Snipes - what about the effect of trauma on the brain development? How does childhood neglect affect the development of the brain? Can childhood development impair the ability to even seek help?
    Assertiveness is huge for me. The moment someone gets abusive, I have to stop.

  • @littlespressurewashing
    @littlespressurewashing Рік тому +2

    Just found Channel and subscribed

  • @Mags58
    @Mags58 6 місяців тому +2

    At 66 I often wonder why my mom told my dad, “we have ignored her long enough” (used my name) in front of me when I was 8. Nothing changed. It’s mind numbing.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  6 місяців тому +2

      I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video

  • @Stranded360
    @Stranded360 2 роки тому +4

    Thank you for your great videos Mrs. Snipes- this one may help me hopefully.

  • @fightswithspirits915
    @fightswithspirits915 Рік тому +3

    Self medication is helpful. I feel normal. Mom and dad never gave advice. Mom knew I discarded her when I was 8 years old and just went with it. I was at a friend's bday party and it clicked, "I've never had a party and don't matter" Don't need anyone or anything. When I make a decision it is absolute.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      I am so sorry about that and I am grateful and I appreciate you being here, watching videos. What tips will you use first to overcome childhood neglect?

  • @joonambeauty3161
    @joonambeauty3161 2 роки тому +5

    Thank you for this video it makes me feel like it’s not my fault that I feel like this sometimes

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Welcome. Thanks for watching.

  • @YouToo472
    @YouToo472 2 роки тому +2

    You have a lot of ‘feels’ regarding this topic❤️👶Thank you for sharing & advocating.

  • @jahspruce8616
    @jahspruce8616 2 роки тому +2

    Hawa sabata Ahab. Thank you for ur lessons ur erudition & dispelling of mentality has been a delight to acquire.

  • @ridgoro
    @ridgoro 9 місяців тому +1

    thank you so much for this! you are a lifesaver, literally

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  9 місяців тому

      You are so welcome!

  • @silviaarzamendia
    @silviaarzamendia Рік тому

    Thankyou so much for this video. I developed BPD, and this information and suggestions are very useful to me. Thanks.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You're very welcome! Thank you for watching the video. Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=BPD
      Helpful videos can also be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=DBT

  • @bunnyoncloud
    @bunnyoncloud Рік тому

    thank you from the bottom of my soul !!! took notes and will work on every bit of information

  • @adristrydom5154
    @adristrydom5154 2 роки тому +2

    Thank you so much for this video. It is extremely helpful.

  • @smoothandchunky1
    @smoothandchunky1 Рік тому +3

    This video is very helpful.
    The bright side I've been in worse situations and came out like a Phoenix. I understand my Mom was under a tremendous amount of pressure and abuse from my psycho narcissistic "dad".
    She was literally up against impossible odds dealing the equivalent of a colicky infant that was supposed to be her spouse. She was just as much a victim as her children, I forgave her long ago.
    FF > I'm stuck with two siblings who just can't get it together. One unemployed for more than 3 years and the other is underemployed.
    I realize the pony is dead. I'm just standing in a field of shit.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому +1

      I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video. What tips will you use first to overcome childhood neglect? Have you seen the videos on ACES? ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=aces

  • @ambrosehunter5164
    @ambrosehunter5164 2 роки тому +5

    “There are indeed stewards whose own contradictory nature causes them to treat the children entrusted to them in so unreasonable a fashion that the children’s illness would appear to be unavoidable.”
    Carl Jung, The Theory of Psychoanalysis

  • @ny3683syr
    @ny3683syr Рік тому

    I'm impressed. You are a very knowledgeable therapist. Subscribed.

  • @LAZY_PHILOMATH
    @LAZY_PHILOMATH 2 роки тому +6

    what i find particularly difficult as an adult is not feeling "Allowed" to have what i want. Therapists and gurus tell me all i have to do is ask, to receive but i have trouble conceptualizing the ideal. For exam[e, she would encourage singing cus she liked singing in the car, but when i was a 4 YO, asking for Piano lessons, i wasn't allowed. Years later I'm an excellent singer but i flunked piano lab in music school, Another time she bought me some darts, i got really good at it. because i felt i had permission. I want my childhood back, but i see it clearly now, it was the Roman Catholic church, (in my families case), and i cant blame them although i did for years...

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Thank you for watching. I am sorry you feel that way. Some videos that might help can be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innercritic
      Please let me know if these help. Thank you!

  • @malloryr315
    @malloryr315 2 роки тому +2

    Thank you so much for this great information.

  • @lianasweeney2287
    @lianasweeney2287 Рік тому +2

    Thank you so much! I'll be watching this video a lot to help me heal as it is dense and has a lot of really great information.

  • @LadyPR1
    @LadyPR1 2 роки тому +2

    This is such a great training! Thank you!

  • @SanctifiedLady
    @SanctifiedLady 2 місяці тому

    Wow, Jesus is saving my life to bring this to surface. At 54yo I questioned why I am estranged from my only child….
    I realize I was unintentionally emotionally neglected as a child, single parent household, my mother was orphaned at 14yo so her needs weren’t met. She didn’t have guidance because her oldest sister was 18yo… 4 girls age 17 to 2yo were left on the 18yo to keep them out of foster care.
    Not knowing I was emotionally unstable, I had a child at 23 yo and repeated the cycle. I did everything I know how, counseling, private school, summer school, night school, summer camp, church, home cooked meals
    And I never knew anything about love?? , feelings?? I never asked HOW DO YOU FEEL??
    I said everyday, how was your day at school? “He always said fine”
    He wasn’t fine, I’m estranged.
    His interpretation was that I was verbally abusive… I think that’s how I made him feel.
    I was so confused.
    I have no lovingly, nurturing relationship after he turned a teenager… he isolated and pulled away.
    He said I called him stupid… I never in my life spoke to anyone that way. But it’s how I made him feel.
    Thank you for the video.
    Now, I’m reeling with all the symptoms you mentioned.
    Having an addiction to spending money that I don’t have then having to return it to pay my bills. 😒 could have been worse.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 місяці тому

      Thank you for sharing your story. It sounds like you've been through a lot of reflection, and it’s incredibly brave to confront the cycles of emotional neglect in your family. It’s clear that you did the best you could with the tools you had at the time, but sometimes, despite our best efforts, the emotional impact of childhood experiences can carry into the next generation.
      It’s really powerful that you’re recognizing the role emotional neglect played in your life and how it may have affected your relationship with your son. The fact that you’ve taken steps like counseling and providing for him in so many ways shows your deep love and care, even if emotional connection was hard to navigate. Sometimes, without realizing it, we repeat patterns from our own upbringing, especially when love and emotional expression weren’t modeled for us.
      What’s important now is that you’re gaining this awareness, and with that comes the possibility of healing-for both you and your relationship with your son. It may take time, and it’s okay to take things one step at a time. Healing doesn’t mean undoing the past, but it does mean understanding, growing, and offering yourself and others grace.
      If it feels right, reaching out to your son with this newfound awareness could help begin the process of mending your relationship, even if it’s just a small step forward. In the meantime, be kind to yourself as you navigate these realizations. You’re on a path of growth, and that’s a powerful thing.
      Also, I’d be grateful if you were to share what you found most useful from the video. Additionally, if you're interested in more tips on the topic or if you want to explore my video library, you can use my AI: allceus.com/AskDocSnipes.
      Thank you again for sharing, and I wish you continued strength and healing.

  • @isabellabihy8631
    @isabellabihy8631 3 місяці тому

    Comment on the point of "negative perception / attitude": In the realm of pessimists and catastrophizers black is a bright color.
    Oops this video hit home hard. I cannot say I had a bad childhood, no physical abuse. Me and my siblings needed to function, the household was to run smoothly, no disturbances. The load of this was on my mother's shoulders. Dad was the sole bread-winner. I was always careful to slip under the radar, not catching unnecessary attention.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  3 місяці тому

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience. It sounds like you’ve carried a lot from growing up in an environment where maintaining order and avoiding disturbances was the priority. Even without overt trauma, the pressure to stay unnoticed and keep things running smoothly can deeply shape how we perceive the world, often leading to those tendencies toward pessimism or catastrophizing. It’s common for people who had to stay “under the radar” in childhood to develop a heightened sensitivity to potential threats or negative outcomes later in life, as a way to maintain control and avoid conflict.
      It’s important to acknowledge that these coping strategies likely served you well in that environment, even if they feel limiting now. Recognizing how these patterns developed is a powerful step in finding ways to shift them and create space for a more balanced perspective. I’m glad this video resonated with you, and I hope it offers insight as you continue exploring and working through these thoughts and feelings. Additionally, if you're interested in more tips on how to overcome this or if you want to explore my video library, you can use my AI: allceus.com/AskDocSnipes.

    • @isabellabihy8631
      @isabellabihy8631 3 місяці тому

      @@DocSnipes Thank you for your respone. Yep, you got that right again, I diligently avoid conflict. Even talk shows on TV distress me.

  • @JohnJones-qj8dm
    @JohnJones-qj8dm Рік тому +1

    You are a smart woman

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому +1

      Thank you. I appreciate you watching the video

  • @Doriesep6622
    @Doriesep6622 Рік тому +2

    this is gold

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      Thank you! I am grateful to be of help and I appreciate you watching the video. What strategy will you use first to overcome childhood neglect?
      Here are the videos on the inner child you might be interested in: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild

  • @elainehodgson6403
    @elainehodgson6403 2 роки тому +2

    wow this was extremly helpful

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Wonderful. Thanks for watching.

  • @SeiergaRugendorf
    @SeiergaRugendorf 6 місяців тому

    The best moments of my life are going to sleep at night, when my husband cuddles me and i feel safe and warm. Something I didn't have before him. Everything else in being alive sucks or, like, okay. If I could just lie down forever with or even without him, just being asleep, I would be so happy.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  6 місяців тому

      Thanks for watching the video and for sharing

  • @angelica351a
    @angelica351a Рік тому

    S o glad I just found this am writing down notes,this is sohelpful.

  • @nesha2456
    @nesha2456 6 місяців тому

    Rising my self since 8 I didn't know any of this and can relate so much

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  6 місяців тому

      I am sorry about that. Thanks for watching

  • @jameslove9696
    @jameslove9696 2 роки тому +3

    Bless you Dr Dawn thank you!!!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      Welcome. Thanks for watching.

  • @dtylice
    @dtylice 7 місяців тому

    Detachment is my superpower.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  7 місяців тому

      Thanks for watching and for sharing

  • @dee0731
    @dee0731 2 роки тому +1

    Great information Doc Snipes thank you 🙌🏻☀️

  • @elisalozano4862
    @elisalozano4862 Рік тому

    Thank you for helping others w your content.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      You’re most welcome. Thank you for watching

  • @onepanwonders3579
    @onepanwonders3579 2 роки тому +1

    This is a very important video.

  • @frutigermetroboomin
    @frutigermetroboomin 3 дні тому

    Great video.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  3 дні тому +1

      Thank you for taking the time to comment. I am grateful to be of service. ~Dawn-Elise

  • @Tutume1111
    @Tutume1111 11 місяців тому

    I see your point however when it comes to neglect it's how that makes a child feel rather than what the parent do or doesn't do.If the parent does his best , sometomes that's still leaves the child feeling neglected regardless the other circumstances.Similarly with trauma both children can go through the same experience and one will be affected differently than the other so I would say its an internal state of the child that can be the most accurate of childhood neglect issues rather than anything else. Similarly there is an aspect of false memories so it's hard to say whether the neglect was voluntary or involuntary action

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  11 місяців тому

      Thanks for watching the video and for sharing

  • @sacredspacesllc5260
    @sacredspacesllc5260 2 роки тому +1

    Thanks for the videos! Is inner child healing evidence-based? I would like to use this with clients.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      There is no evidence based treatment for inner child work. Thanks for watching.

  • @iurk0_streaming
    @iurk0_streaming Рік тому

    This is really good stuff

  • @leratomatonkonyane
    @leratomatonkonyane 11 місяців тому

    Thank you so much

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  11 місяців тому

      You're most welcome

  • @Trying_very
    @Trying_very 2 роки тому +2

    Thanks

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Thanks so much for the tip!!

  • @Trying_very
    @Trying_very 2 роки тому +3

    I must have just missed the live 🤦‍♀️ oh well - next time 😅🤞

    • @jameslove9696
      @jameslove9696 2 роки тому +2

      Same here catching up now though lol

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      Catch me next time. :)

    • @jameslove9696
      @jameslove9696 2 роки тому

      @@DocSnipes absolutely!!! You are awesome and the world needs more of you!!! Xoxo

  • @ambrosehunter5164
    @ambrosehunter5164 2 роки тому +2

    Rageaholism becomes some of us due to thy topic thou art discussing Madame Director Snipes. This ISM needs to be addressed and how to properly navigate one's self through it as a recovery process?

  • @screechingwind114
    @screechingwind114 10 місяців тому

    I want to reprogram myself , but perhaps thats where " Honor your Parents " comes in and I hesitate, I have explored the neglect , realize parents arent perfect, and have forgiven their imperfections...but still dealing with the first 7 years+ program of the past...

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  10 місяців тому +1

      I am sorry about that and I appreciate you watching the video

  • @adristrydom5154
    @adristrydom5154 2 роки тому +2

    How can I replace messages that are so ingrained that they're a central part of my identity?

  • @charleshurstreinvention3959
    @charleshurstreinvention3959 2 роки тому +6

    They way to do it is to not fall into the victimhood mindset as many do for the rest of their lives. Something I told my own subscribers this week. As I see this daily as a healthcare provider. People who are destroyed adults because they couldn't outrun a terrible childhood. Too many times this becomes the excuse to give up. The reason someone won't try. "Because this (fill in the blank) happened to me." Now understand I am not discounting terrible childhoods. I had one as well. What I am saying is that the world doesn't care. It is totally indifferent. It may owe you but good luck trying to collect. The only way to collect your due is to go out and seek it, pursue it and take it back from the universe. The stories of great triumph are rarely without great adversity--ever notice that? Most will lie down to bad circumstances. But those who get up and fight back will insure that their story is a great one. Hope this helps someone out there---keep being great---Charles.

    • @julietcrowson3503
      @julietcrowson3503 2 роки тому +6

      Hello Charles
      I think you have valid points but something missing from the assumption that someone get up and fight is that they have the energy to fight. Some people don't have any more energy to fight, because they've had too many traumas and are exhausted, or they're too old to want to fight for a life of yet more drudgery day after day. I think it's important to recognise that sometim s people are so exhausted that they can no longer think properly any more, so can't open their post to pay bills, can't deal with complex situations any more and just want some peace. 'Giving up' is sometimes the route to painlessness and not really giving in to victimhood...
      Whistleblowers are badly treated and their adversaries would have the wb neutralised, they're not in victimhood but are actual victims of narcs....
      Tired now so hope this makes sense..
      🙏🙂⭐✝️☯️🌼✌️🕉️☮️⛪💫🫂☁️✨🌟😴

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      Thanks for watching.

    • @charleshurstreinvention3959
      @charleshurstreinvention3959 2 роки тому

      @@DocSnipes Good stuff

  • @justinheer9098
    @justinheer9098 2 роки тому +3

    I don't need to lye in a pile of manuer to know it stinks lol

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +4

      Thanks for watching. Wishing you peace, health, and happiness.

    • @justinheer9098
      @justinheer9098 2 роки тому +3

      I love your stuff I stumbled onto the codependency stuff , it's been very helpful your soothing and the other pages offered info but were way to bent on narcissists . You cover a wider range with a more helpful doable approach .

  • @irwincrook567
    @irwincrook567 2 роки тому +6

    How the hell did you know everything about me and my childhood?

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому +1

      I appreciate you watching

  • @furkandesign-art9213
    @furkandesign-art9213 2 роки тому +1

    15:45

  • @SweetUniverse
    @SweetUniverse 2 роки тому +1

    I have no idea what a good caregiver is & that's kind of scary. I don't know anyone who has had a good parent.

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Thanks for watching.

    • @wakinglife7065
      @wakinglife7065 Рік тому

      I just tried drawing with my non dominant hand of my dream parents. The attributes I wish they had such as respectful, helpful send me to school with lunch etc. apparently if you do this with your non dominant hand it starts rewiring the brain. I have only just did this but it did help me figure out what I needed and what I need. Starting to journal as I’m just overcoming addiction. This is a hard road. My parents specifically my father set me up to fail. I drew him and all the truths I wanted to tell him. Hope you recover and get your needs met

  • @massangabe
    @massangabe 2 роки тому +1

    Danke!

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Thanks so much for the tip!

  • @yesthank1577
    @yesthank1577 2 роки тому +2

    On point

  • @rhiannalopez3805
    @rhiannalopez3805 Місяць тому

    But the child who is left with the person watching them can be neglected by that person that was supposed to take care of them when the parent is away. That is also a form of neglect due to reliance upon that person who was trusted

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Місяць тому +1

      You're absolutely right. Neglect can happen even when a parent believes they've left their child in the care of someone trusted. It's especially painful when that trust is broken, as it can deeply affect the child's sense of security. Healing from this type of experience requires acknowledging the hurt and finding ways to rebuild trust in safe relationships.
      Have you found any specific strategies that help in processing those kinds of experiences?

    • @rhiannalopez3805
      @rhiannalopez3805 Місяць тому

      @@DocSnipes I’ve done a lot of research involving emotional regulation and self awareness as well as the difference between conditional/instrumental and relational connections. I’ve also been doing exposure therapy on myself which has helped me tremendously so far those things are what get me through my experience with childhood neglect but I’ve done so many other things on my own. I used to be conditioned but now I’m in the process of reparenting myself. I’ve actually committed to watch your video on that later today ❤️

  • @helloworld188
    @helloworld188 2 роки тому +2

    My goodness, the prototype of my parents

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  2 роки тому

      Thanks for watching. Other videos that might help can be found at: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=neglect

  • @paramjitkariyam3782
    @paramjitkariyam3782 2 роки тому

    V good sister

  • @USMARSHALL2011
    @USMARSHALL2011 2 роки тому

    Cool

  • @moonshineonme75013
    @moonshineonme75013 2 роки тому +2

    36:30

  • @rickbrummer3628
    @rickbrummer3628 Рік тому +1

    I think neglect is a type of abuse

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      Yes, it is. Thanks for watching the video. What did you find most useful from it? Other videos you might be interested in can be found at ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild

  • @Trying_very
    @Trying_very 2 роки тому

    Hi Doc Snipes!

  • @Angels_surround_me747
    @Angels_surround_me747 2 роки тому +2

    👋👍❤

  • @kuibeiguahua
    @kuibeiguahua Рік тому

    Hehehe I hugged and kissed myself, then did the dishes then high fived myself

  • @cmarkd1
    @cmarkd1 Рік тому

    Dr. Snipes, thank you for an insightful and compassionate discussion. I hadn't realized the full impact of childhood trauma and neglect that disrupted much of my adult life. I'm happy to BE learning self-compassion as I reconcile health challenges and rewiring unhealthy misconception s. Definitely a subscriber now! 🥲

    • @DocSnipes
      @DocSnipes  Рік тому

      Thank you so much for subscribing. I am sorry you’ve experienced childhood trauma. Here are the videos on the inner child: ua-cam.com/users/DocSnipessearch?query=innerchild

  • @SanctifiedLady
    @SanctifiedLady 2 місяці тому

    Wow, Jesus is saving my life to bring this to surface. At 54yo I questioned why I am estranged from my only child….
    I realize I was unintentionally emotionally neglected as a child, single parent household, my mother was orphaned at 14yo so her needs weren’t met. She didn’t have guidance because her oldest sister was 18yo… 4 girls age 17 to 2yo were left on the 18yo to keep them out of foster care.
    Not knowing I was emotionally unstable, I had a child at 23 yo and repeated the cycle. I did everything I know how, counseling, private school, summer school, night school, summer camp, church, home cooked meals
    And I never knew anything about love?? , feelings?? I never asked HOW DO YOU FEEL??
    I said everyday, how was your day at school? “He always said fine”
    He wasn’t fine, I’m estranged.
    His interpretation was that I was verbally abusive… I think that’s how I made him feel.
    I was so confused.
    I have no lovingly, nurturing relationship after he turned a teenager… he isolated and pulled away.
    He said I called him stupid… I never in my life spoke to anyone that way. But it’s how I made him feel.
    Thank you for the video.
    Now, I’m reeling with all the symptoms you mentioned.
    Having an addiction to spending money that I don’t have then having to return it to pay my bills. 😒 could have been worse.