My entry: "Welcome to Embarrassing Bodies, where you can come to talk about problems you wouldn't even tell your family members, but are perfectly happy to have broadcast on national television"
From Rodney Dangerfield: "I went to my doctor's and he told me he wanted a semen sample, a urine sample and a stool sample." "So, I took off my trousers and handed him my underwear!" Miss you Rodney, and bless the creators of Mock the Week! 😂👍
This next patient we're about to show is severely obese. He weighs 150kg and suffers from type 2 diabetes but lets not sugarcoat that just incase he decides to eat it''
'Hello, I'll be your surgeon for this operation. Um, nurse,could you notify the priest?' 'HELLOOOOOOO... (hellooo). My, your vagina is massive' 'I'd like to begin with a prayer...'
My entries: "Now unfortunately, this life-saving brain surgery will impede the patience's mental faculties, but on the plus side, it'll make him easier to control." "IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST, I COMMAND THAT THIS DEMON TO LEAVE THIS MAN'S APPENDIX!!! CAN I GET AMEN, BROTHERS AND SISTERS!?!" "After being burnt alive and having all my limbs severed, the surgeons were able to replace my arms and legs with artificial limbs and I was given a portable life support machine to keep me alive and wouldn't be standing here if It was for Emperor Palpatine."
Things you never read about in a Mock The Week UA-cam comments section: People not bitching about Frankie Boyle because they're not precious, repetitive fucks who can't move on.
My line: "Eating a healthy, balanced and nutritional diet is what many of us overlook and need to implement in our life- *looks at watch* OH good its my lunch break, McDonalds here I come!!"
TheAnnihilatorGamer It's a governing body of football and it's really embarrassing because of all sorts of corruption and stuff like that involved by them, especially by the main executives.
"We'll be starting the procedure by numbing your breasts. NUMNOMNUMNOMNUMNOM!" - I died XD
Great jokes here. But Andy Parson's joke at 1:39 made me laugh so much.
'Look! No Hands!' :D :D :D
@Crane Engine Productions - I’ll be honest, I don’t understand that joke.
@@Louise-fv7rb "Everything's funny except the things that offend me specifically. They shouldn't be allowed"
@@jupiter3io523 How can you not understand it... none of his fingers are inside which means his penis is.
I expected that one
I couldn't help notice HIS GROIN.
🎶 "the neck bones connected to the foot-bone! The footbones connected to the eye-ball!" 🎶
Holland Kerr yess!!
gimme the defribbilator, im'a defrib somthen.
+Scy Thank you! I had no idea what he was saying...
this week on embarasing bodies... FIFA 😂😂
The Jeremy Hunt jokes are always relatable, as Australia's Health Minister is named Greg Hunt.
Is it just the last name? Or is "Greg" interchangeable with "Jeremy"?
@@kylestubbs8867 It's just the last name.
Things you wouldn't hear on an American medical show: "It's lupus"
Except for that one time
God Almaighty, Dougal, it's never lupus!
is there a doctor in the house?
“I’m afraid we’re going to have to refer you to Monsoon Poultry Hospital.”
0:36 🤣
"I think we've got the balance about right: the hospital is clean but the nurses are filthy."
My entry:
"Welcome to Embarrassing Bodies, where you can come to talk about problems you wouldn't even tell your family members, but are perfectly happy to have broadcast on national television"
TheRealXboxNerd I
My sister's godmother produces that show
The numbing breast one was my favourite!! ^^ nom nom nom nom nom... :D
I tried that one on my attractive neighbour yesterday, my court case is next week.
@@speckledjim9895 hahahaha
@@speckledjim9895 try wayaying them instead.
I'm Dr Crispin and I am always here
Hugh got something for the nurses🤣🤣
I swear this the third nurse joke from 3 different episode 🤣🤣
my entry
don't worry what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.. except your polio
hello im Dr christian, and these are my colleagues Dr jewish and Dr muslim
''Did you know that i suffer from constipation?. No shit!''
What is your blood type?
A?
I said what is your blood type?
O. B.
I don't know where this joke is from, does anyone else know?
Robert Medd Stephen Fry's monologue called The Letter
"Positive?"
Brooklin 99 I think
@@farmingace1015 No, the first guy was right
..... 40 words a min, innit bruv.....
ramesh milton and dennis really were funny in this episode
From Rodney Dangerfield:
"I went to my doctor's and he told me he wanted a semen sample, a urine sample and a stool sample."
"So, I took off my trousers and handed him my underwear!"
Miss you Rodney, and bless the creators of Mock the Week! 😂👍
Miltons Tombola joke creased me up
My entry: “Hello, Tracey, I’m Doctor Stevens. You have acute appendicitis.”
“Ooh! Does it have a dimple?”
1:05 oh God am weak 😂😂😂😂
This week on one born every minute, a patient gives birth to Micheal Crawford. Apparently some mother's do have em
That FIFA joke just ages better and better
Today on Doctor Oz, we talk to someone with an actual medical degree.
what about: 'don't worry, it's perfectly safe, let me hide stand behind the lead screen'
Things you wouldn't hear on a American medical show
We'll get you fixed up before we check your wallet 😂
Ok let me just take a loo… OH MY GOODNESS HAHAHAHA WHAT EVEN IS THAT
next up is embarrassing bodies, or as some like to call it, the Tory party broadcast
Pissing myself
Some of these are so bad, but oh so good! :)
Who’s the woman, she’s hilarious
Holly Walsh.
I love Rob
''''That's not classed as a second opinion when you ask the same doctor again about your condition''
''This patient has had a heart attack after reading his medical bill''
My entry:
''No no, I've been doing this for 12 years, HOLY SHIT WHAT IS THAT?!"
funnily enough, you may well hear all of these on a medical drama
0:48
Ironically the question was, “unlikely things to be said on a medical show”.
I know for a fact this joke for numbing was made on Scrubs
Looking forward to the episode =)
The buzzer sounds weird.
This next patient we're about to show is severely obese. He weighs 150kg and suffers from type 2 diabetes but lets not sugarcoat that just incase he decides to eat it''
It’s just a flesh wound! It’s just a flesh wound!
''After Cheryl Fernandez Versini gave birth to a baby boy. We can report that both the baby and Liam Payne are doing very well''
'Hello, I'll be your surgeon for this operation. Um, nurse,could you notify the priest?'
'HELLOOOOOOO... (hellooo). My, your vagina is massive'
'I'd like to begin with a prayer...'
My entries:
"Now unfortunately, this life-saving brain surgery will impede the patience's mental faculties, but on the plus side, it'll make him easier to control."
"IN THE NAME OF OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST, I COMMAND THAT THIS DEMON TO LEAVE THIS MAN'S APPENDIX!!! CAN I GET AMEN, BROTHERS AND SISTERS!?!"
"After being burnt alive and having all my limbs severed, the surgeons were able to replace my arms and legs with artificial limbs and I was given a portable life support machine to keep me alive and wouldn't be standing here if It was for Emperor Palpatine."
All gold!
Andy parsons and hugh Dennis are just legends of mock the week.... Rob Beckett I just don't find funny...
An Americentric entry:
"Well, sorry to say, you have TB. Which is really bad news for your moderate to severe plaque psoriasis."
I think Frankie would have killed this one.
My entry:
No, no, no wait a second. Let's just see what happens first.
what about " and the lines are now open place your vote in who you want to lose a limb or who u want to stay whole"
2:43 After this joke look up Chris Pratt Kim Kardashian on UA-cam for a great cumback story!
No Doctor Who jokes really. those were the first ons that came inmind
Things you wouldn't hear on Mock the Week: Andy Parsons a comedy genius & its just as funny as it ever was during the Frankie Boyle era!
Because FIFA is like a governing body
Things you never read about in a Mock The Week UA-cam comments section: People not bitching about Frankie Boyle because they're not precious, repetitive fucks who can't move on.
''Next up on America's biggest loser Richard Simmons''
How is Richard Simmons a loser? Have you seen him on Whose Line?
Its a double meaning as in weight loss or a loser.
Funny comment. Sex/nudity joke.
Rinse and Repeat.
My line: "Eating a healthy, balanced and nutritional diet is what many of us overlook and need to implement in our life- *looks at watch* OH good its my lunch break, McDonalds here I come!!"
Don't get the FIFA joke
FIFA is the governing body of football/soccer. And it's really embarrassing.
ok... still nothing dude!
TheAnnihilatorGamer because FIFA are clueless :)
ah ok
TheAnnihilatorGamer It's a governing body of football and it's really embarrassing because of all sorts of corruption and stuff like that involved by them, especially by the main executives.
Lol!
great jokes all around disliked for any and all of rob beckett's contributions
He was funny though
What's with Milton's voice?
uprightgrandpianokid He just uses characterisations from time to time. He likes to get into the spirit of it all.
Can someone explain why the female comedienne on this show is never funny...?
Because you're a misogynist.
MtW really has gone to shit, where are Russel Howard and Frankie boyle.
Old jokes. Put in an American!