We Read Gotham High So You Don't Have To (ft. EFAP) - FULL VERSION

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  • Опубліковано 15 лис 2024

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  • @JLongbone
    @JLongbone  Рік тому +463

    All the Moaning Mauler in one place!
    ►Join SubscribeStar!
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    • @stingerredshock3418
      @stingerredshock3418 Рік тому +1

      Wait, are you saying I can get a full montage of Mewberton moaning if I donate?
      Take my fucking money

    • @Vashthestampede967
      @Vashthestampede967 Рік тому +49

      Mauler asmr

    • @Kernwadi
      @Kernwadi Рік тому +13

      Thank you, mommy.

    • @kingagrabowska9366
      @kingagrabowska9366 Рік тому +15

      Will you watch the original and the remake of The Little Mermaid just like 101 Dalmatians and Mulan?

    • @JCResDoc94
      @JCResDoc94 Рік тому +5

      *this has nothig to DO w vampires?! what is this? o_0* got the kids all gathered around, waiting for the video to drop all night. in the end, had to send them to bed *hungry.* not just for content: but also food. we dont have dinner until the episode drops - dont tell me how to raise my kids! so my kids arent getting fed, bc of you. & they cry. _JC #iwtv

  • @jessilynallendilla5014
    @jessilynallendilla5014 Рік тому +1704

    Selina needs money
    A: get a job
    B: accept it from her generous billionaire friend
    C: commit multiple felonies and fake her death

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +254

      Don’t forget make a plan that makes no sense to get her dad money, even though there’s no way he’d be able to manage it

    • @jessicareid8474
      @jessicareid8474 Рік тому +146

      And main an unrelated kid for life just because. Seriously, what was the point of that?

    • @tultsi93
      @tultsi93 Рік тому +60

      I would've done either A or B, but unfortunately Selina isn't me.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +60

      Or accept it from her billionaire friend as a loan. Selina puts it like a handout or a kidnapping plot were her two options.

    • @callumbreton8930
      @callumbreton8930 Рік тому

      ​@@jessicareid8474 because she's a self insert girlboss who pretends to be poor when she's actually rich in order to get pity points while not having to deal with the real life struggles of poverty, acting like what she does is morally justifiable and sympathetic when in reality everyone sees her as the heartless psychopath she truly is

  • @Phoenix0F8
    @Phoenix0F8 Рік тому +242

    Mauler's Bruce Wayne is the performance of the goddamn *century.*
    His uncle is gay.

  • @brycekrispiez714
    @brycekrispiez714 Рік тому +267

    Jack Napier: We live in a society don’t we Bruce?
    Bruce Wayne: 蝙蝠侠 bing chilling

    • @dante_0962
      @dante_0962 8 місяців тому +16

      Jack Napier: WTF are you talking about?

  • @Adelynoir
    @Adelynoir Рік тому +1093

    Making the characters Asian just shows how freaking racist and ignorant the author is.
    1) Korea has its own writing system that is 100% different than Chinese. They don't even look similar.
    2) in Honkong they speak Cantonese
    3) THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS READING MANDARIN. Writing in China is all in Standardized Chinese that is the same across all dialects including Cantonese and Mandarin. There is a whole huge history about it.
    So yeah, silly accents aren't racist.
    But changing a character to be a race you are totally ignorant about for woke points is.

    • @Adelynoir
      @Adelynoir Рік тому +106

      @@lahuk1194 Hanja is the Korean word for Chinese Characters. It is not a writing system used in Korea or taught. Only Hangul.

    • @Adelynoir
      @Adelynoir Рік тому +88

      @@lahuk1194 No, never. You will see Chinese translations around Seoul on the subway( along with English and Japanese) and restaurants will use Hanja in their logo (or Kanji for Japanese). Some children will learn a few characters from comic books and things where it is kind of considered fun and mysterious. But in books/ public documents/ everything else it is only Hangul

    • @KlutzyNinjaKitty
      @KlutzyNinjaKitty Рік тому +19

      So, wait, if there’s a standard chinese written language, what does that make cantonese or mandarin? Are they just regional dialects? Because I thought they were different languages.

    • @Adelynoir
      @Adelynoir Рік тому +111

      @@KlutzyNinjaKitty there are many spoken dialects( essentially different languages) but they are all written in standard. So if you are in Taiwan or Hong Kong the characters and their order are the same as in your home. You will read them differently according to your dialect but the writing is the same everywhere.
      Think like 我爱你 I love you. In Mandarin read Wǒ ài nǐ, in Cantonese, Ngor oi lei, in taiwanese góa ài lì.

    • @KlutzyNinjaKitty
      @KlutzyNinjaKitty Рік тому +39

      @@Adelynoir - Oh, okay. Thanks for clearing that up for me! :D

  • @TrueUnderDawgGaming
    @TrueUnderDawgGaming Рік тому +498

    The worst part about this story is how the author thought her twist was actually clever...

    • @callumbreton8930
      @callumbreton8930 Рік тому +86

      Even worse, she tried to justify the actions of a psychopath. It's like saying Anton Chigurh was just misunderstood

    • @probablyjinxed
      @probablyjinxed Рік тому +1

      i could legit feel the author’s shit-eating know-it-all grin through the paper at that plot twist.

    • @dandydoodle4456
      @dandydoodle4456 Рік тому +2

      Also dont forget that the blurb spoils it,

    • @bad-people6510
      @bad-people6510 Рік тому +12

      @@dandydoodle4456Spoils it three times. But here's the thing about spoilers... I don't actually have anything to follow that up, this comic has just conditioned me to follow every single thought with the phrase "Here's the thing about X."

    • @CarrionCrow993
      @CarrionCrow993 11 місяців тому +10

      Nah, the worst part is she definitely thought our hearts were bleeding for Saleena, (or however you spell that petulant sociopath's name).

  • @SigmaSyndicate
    @SigmaSyndicate Рік тому +1182

    I like how Bruce just straight-up offers Selena money to take care of her dying father, and she just says "No! I only want it if I can steal it from you!" Lmao

    • @valentinegonsalves7322
      @valentinegonsalves7322 Рік тому +152

      I know, right? For one, its not like he's the stereotypical brat who's throwing money at anyone that Selina would feel insulted.
      She NEEDS the money. He's her childhood friend, OFFERING to help her. And she straight-up tells him, "I'd rather steal your money than you give it to me. Because you giving it to me is robbing me off my agency and that's misogynistic and anti-feminist."
      I'm a writer. The premise of this book is to make Selina a girlboss. They DID that with Anne Hathaway. How about just have Bruce throw a party on his return to Gotham and then his safe has been emptied. Its kinda like the movie but its in the context of high-school kids this time. Much better than hiring kidnappers, faking your own kidnapping, use of rare chemical drugs and faking your own death and faking a love triangle. But then she's actually with Ivy.
      On the one hand, the story tells you Selina is broke. On the other hand, it implies she hired the gambling goons to kidnap people and they have access to rare herb drugs that they can turn into tranquilizer all so she could steal some cash and move her dad to a care home. What?!

    • @kregy7509
      @kregy7509 Рік тому +65

      And as a bonus, the herb they used is supposedly super dangerous. "so basically I have to throw it up or I will die" is what Bruce says. So, if he had any health condition or just didn't figure it out he would have died. Selina could have killed him, instead of simply asking for help.

    • @valentinegonsalves7322
      @valentinegonsalves7322 Рік тому +35

      @@kregy7509 I didn't even get that far. I was still stuck up on where the hell would she source such herb from. The book implies Ivy grows this shit.
      This is the point at which you question the setting as a writer. For any of this to work, not a single adult/parent has to be paying the slightest attention to their kid.

    • @cam5816
      @cam5816 9 місяців тому

      Our brilliant genius woke college educated female author was sitting at her desk writing the last chapter like “hmmm…Selina is black so how should I make her commit a crime before the story is over? 🤔”

    • @HydraBill57
      @HydraBill57 7 місяців тому

      Pppppppppppppp😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊😊pppp😊​@@valentinegonsalves7322

  • @blurry_face_exe60
    @blurry_face_exe60 Рік тому +1939

    I love how the story boils down to “Selina is a terrible person please feel sympathy for her.”

    • @viljamtheninja
      @viljamtheninja Рік тому +307

      That's the problem with the writers. They don't actually see her as a terrible person, they see her as a good person and a hero because they are psychopaths themselves who never developed a sense of personal responsibility in anything.

    • @Nostripe361
      @Nostripe361 Рік тому +2

      I mean she went out of her way to be dick to jack and Bruce. If all she needs was money then just keep stealing money from dumb rich kids.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому

      @@Nostripe361 all that money to go to her potato brained dad

    • @catspawgardner3213
      @catspawgardner3213 Рік тому

      This Selena used two guys to fawn over her she played them to get what she wants this Selena in my eyes was a bitch she thrived on the live triangle. The real Selena never did that with Bruce he was the only man that was her equal & was never the "Queen Bee/Popular Girl" in high school. She would be very much like the cats alone & aloof the mysterious girl. The creator of this comic I think based this comic on her life & she is Selena then why not base characters on her life instead of changing these beloved DC characters? Bruce never showed he knew martial arts in public he did that as Batman. On the animated series when he was fighting a ninja rival from his past Robin used a rug to cover a reporter named Summer so she wouldn't see Bruce display his martial arts skills. Because she & the public are unaware that Bruce studies several different martial arts forms & Bruce wanted to keep it that way.

    • @flaviusofthewest
      @flaviusofthewest Рік тому +83

      You talking about She-hulk or Catwoman? (This version of Selina and She-Hulk give the same awful "woke" vibes.)

  • @silverscorpio24
    @silverscorpio24 Рік тому +151

    "Alright, now Bruce Wayne is CHI-NESE! If you bring me someone who isn't *CHI-NESE* ya FUCKED UP!!"
    🤣🤣🤣

    • @Woody_Ben_Woodinger
      @Woody_Ben_Woodinger 8 місяців тому +24

      But Boss, how we gonna see him in the DERK?

    • @demod2080
      @demod2080 8 місяців тому +18

      ​@@Woody_Ben_WoodingerHe has a black trench coat, just grab the kid in the trench coat!

    • @lmahu6627
      @lmahu6627 8 місяців тому +19

      ​@@demod2080 [Cut to next scene]
      "Goddamn it, guys! You fucked up?!"

  • @aquapuppy9838
    @aquapuppy9838 Рік тому +611

    "I wanted to give Joker a unique look, which is why I gave him a haircut that was so common, I had it at the time."

    • @ravenkeeper
      @ravenkeeper Рік тому +78

      "And that in many modern iterations of the character he already has."

    • @Lobsterwithinternet
      @Lobsterwithinternet Рік тому +30

      “And makes him look like Roger Klotz from the cartoon Doug.

    • @tultsi93
      @tultsi93 Рік тому +15

      @@Lobsterwithinternet Don't insult Roger like that! He's my favorite character!

    • @jaytonius560
      @jaytonius560 7 місяців тому +6

      It’s amazing how unaware narcissists are of their own narcissism.

  • @Sousabird
    @Sousabird Рік тому +2280

    Its so wild that basically every super hero, cop, and supervillain were all alumni of the same school, and in the same year no less.

    • @muigokublack6487
      @muigokublack6487 Рік тому +213

      Miss Piggy: "What an unbelievable coincidence!"

    • @tgiacin435
      @tgiacin435 Рік тому +179

      See I wouldn’t mind the concept if this was an X-men evolution thing, but god damn, this barely resembles Batman

    • @hardpack187
      @hardpack187 Рік тому +66

      It's just like Marvel and Star Wars. Everyone is related to everyone else in some ridiculous way

    • @tgiacin435
      @tgiacin435 Рік тому +73

      @@hardpack187 Star Wars is one thing because it’s a space opera, and the original 6 was specifically about the Skywalker family

    • @hardpack187
      @hardpack187 Рік тому +8

      @@tgiacin435 "A space opera". Don't use that like it's an actual term

  • @roflcopter_launchpad1116
    @roflcopter_launchpad1116 Рік тому +1630

    I will forever be pissed, not at the fact that this exists, but that they missed the glaringly obvious opportunity to name the school team "the Gotham KNIGHTS".

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +177

      But nope, they had to be the Bats with the classic bat symbol because **get it**?!? 😅

    • @bdpickett
      @bdpickett Рік тому +115

      Knights is the name of literally every sports team in Gotham in canon. It's actually a bit obnoxious.

    • @roflcopter_launchpad1116
      @roflcopter_launchpad1116 Рік тому +207

      @@bdpickett GOOD. Beat the dead cavalry horse until it's glue.

    • @evantovar2177
      @evantovar2177 Рік тому +18

      @@bdpickett I thought it was Gotham Goliath’s?

    • @virtueofabsolution7641
      @virtueofabsolution7641 Рік тому +31

      That would require literally any cleverness. At all.

  • @mrnight4371
    @mrnight4371 Рік тому +517

    I come back every once any awhile to hear rags say “I know I wasn’t there for you then…back I’m here now”

    • @Falzelo
      @Falzelo Рік тому +42

      Omg same. Heard it hundred time already but I still laugh every damn time

    • @tedthetonberry225
      @tedthetonberry225 Рік тому +29

      Yup, also come back for Rag's reaction to Mauler's "Look there's a cat picture!"

    • @stevo-kun3924
      @stevo-kun3924 10 місяців тому +7

      Facts lol listening again now lol

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 9 місяців тому +9

      21:29

    • @VinnieMF
      @VinnieMF 4 місяці тому +2

      I cry from laughing every time.

  • @CarrionCrow993
    @CarrionCrow993 11 місяців тому +184

    Mauler's inability to deliver a line without making it sexual had me corpsing all the way through.

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 9 місяців тому +20

      Corpsing” never heard that one before 😂😂

    • @ravensflockmate
      @ravensflockmate 8 місяців тому +14

      It's a common term for cracking up on camera

    • @jacksonconstantine5740
      @jacksonconstantine5740 7 місяців тому +5

      @@jay-b1223it’s when an actor breaks character from laughing

    • @Abexian2234
      @Abexian2234 3 місяці тому +1

      Better send for The Man

  • @alexandersmatrala7641
    @alexandersmatrala7641 Рік тому +608

    Somehow even in the worst depictions of batman Alfred is the best character

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +147

      Yep, man's chilling throughout this disaster of a story.

    • @RaptorRockDrakeJesus
      @RaptorRockDrakeJesus Рік тому +79

      Aaabbbrrrruuuuuccceeeee?

    • @mathieuleader8601
      @mathieuleader8601 Рік тому +29

      that's some nice consistency

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +36

      @@nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Yup, just sipping his wine and letting his underage nephew refill his glass. 😅

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 Рік тому +10

      I hope he's strapped in this as well.

  • @jay-b1223
    @jay-b1223 Рік тому +714

    1:36:26 so they cancel school when Selina was kidnapped _outside_ of school, but when Harvey and Bruce get accosted & kidnapped _inside_ of school they just continue as normal?? Someone please make it make sense! 😂😂😂

    • @autisticusretardius101
      @autisticusretardius101 Рік тому +56

      A wahman got kidnapped you gotta shut down everything.

    • @corynthius8860
      @corynthius8860 Рік тому +32

      That moment is way too far in to start trying to make sense of it lmao

    • @TripleBarrel06
      @TripleBarrel06 Рік тому +50

      You think the writer is competent enough to consider such impossible dreams as consistency? You're acting as if the writer did a second draft.

    • @P.T.S.E.
      @P.T.S.E. Рік тому +31

      The author grew up on Harry Potter. That level of school violence is normal for her.

    • @fd502
      @fd502 Рік тому +6

      If it happens where people can see it and give the school a bad name then you must acknowledge it but if no one sees it then it didn’t happen.

  • @MelloTheAnalysist
    @MelloTheAnalysist Рік тому +70

    "Hey Selina, my childhood friend and lover. I see you're in need of money. Let me lend you some."
    "NUH UH"

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +13

      “FYM NU-UH?”

    • @DMAN99
      @DMAN99 3 місяці тому

      But how can she remain a Strong Independent Woman™ if she accepts a man’s help?

  • @AlphaOmega1237
    @AlphaOmega1237 Рік тому +486

    I just can't get over the fact that someone thought "Arkham Prep" was a good idea for a prep school. That's like naming a school after Alcatraz.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +91

      Yeah like, why not call it Sionis prep, or Tetch prep, or any other connection to the Batman Mythos other than the Lunatic asylum

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 Рік тому +43

      It kinda makes sense since some of the main Batman villains attend the school - so it’s “prepping” them for their f-ed up future 😂😂

    • @AlphaOmega1237
      @AlphaOmega1237 Рік тому +44

      @@jay-b1223 Actually, that's Gotham High, which is also a pretty terrible name but for different reasons. Arkham Prep is the school that Bruce got expelled from at the start.

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 Рік тому +1

      @@AlphaOmega1237 ahhh right

    • @scottski02
      @scottski02 Рік тому +31

      School-to-prison pipeline in full swing

  • @Lauren007E
    @Lauren007E Рік тому +202

    It's ironic, when Alfred in the comics calls Bruce "Master Wayne" it's actually very informal for a butler, but when this Alfred does it it seems almost passive aggressive and cold

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +2

      “Why did his parents have to die and leave this little shit to be my responsibility

    • @alfalldoot6715
      @alfalldoot6715 Рік тому +8

      Wait what are butlers supposed to call their bosses?

    • @Fanciest-Hobo
      @Fanciest-Hobo Рік тому +71

      "Master Wayne" is a term for a child. Meaning in typical Batman stories Alfred calls Bruce "Master Wayne" basically as a nickname. Like a father who still calls his adult son "kiddo."

    • @revolvingworld2676
      @revolvingworld2676 Рік тому +28

      Its weird cause this Alfred is his uncle not really his butler. So calling him “master bruce” like a butler is a bit weird

    • @AlinaAniretake
      @AlinaAniretake 11 місяців тому +9

      ​@@revolvingworld2676they're roleplaying

  • @inferior3199
    @inferior3199 Рік тому +369

    I love how Bruce saves the black kid from the bullies and then gives him the card to his dojo and says "Tell master Zhang I sent you" even though he didn't even introduce himself to him.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +138

      He’s like
      “Yeah uh, Zhang? This Chinese kid told me to tell you you sent me?”
      “What was his name?”
      “I dunno, he
      wore a school shooter trench coat and always sounded like he was trying to pinch out a shit.”

    • @tultsi93
      @tultsi93 Рік тому +85

      @@GigaChadh976 "Oh, don't worry. It's just Bruce Wayne. Fine young man."

    • @johannesseyfried7933
      @johannesseyfried7933 Рік тому +75

      ​@@tultsi93 "The one with the gay uncle?"

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +67

      @@johannesseyfried7933 “Yeah! His mom and dad were tied up and put into a bathtub. And then they died somehow.”

    • @justaguy6613
      @justaguy6613 Рік тому +54

      @@GigaChadh976 "yeah, and also his mother was a Chinese woman who actually was the main financial backer of their company. Did I mention his uncle is super gay?"

  • @outisaudio5838
    @outisaudio5838 Рік тому +121

    I rewatch this like a favorite film from time to time. The moaning, the gay uncle, it's all so brilliantly narrated.

    • @ageaan
      @ageaan Рік тому +13

      Me too! I’ve watched it several times!

    • @TheStonedZone
      @TheStonedZone 10 місяців тому +11

      I still constantly quote both this one and I Am Not Starfire.

  • @bippiebedd9122
    @bippiebedd9122 Рік тому +304

    Bruce: Selena I’ll give u the money to help your father as he desperately needs help as soon as possible.
    Selena: I don’t need ur help or ur money. I’ll just steal your money using elaborate plots that will take an entire semester while simultaneously running my relationship with both the men I’m into.

    • @jazzyqueen4980
      @jazzyqueen4980 Рік тому +13

      Running or ruining?

    • @justaguy6613
      @justaguy6613 Рік тому +1

      @@jazzyqueen4980 running...over them like the gigantic clusterfuck of a character she is.

    • @jazzyqueen4980
      @jazzyqueen4980 Рік тому +5

      @@justaguy6613 true

    • @Sir_Squirrelington_III
      @Sir_Squirrelington_III Рік тому +27

      "And when that plan doesn't work, I still won't take the money and just kill myself instead"

  • @scottski02
    @scottski02 Рік тому +1006

    MauLer's Bruce Wayne moaning voice is comedic perfection

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +147

      His Bruce moan is half sexy, half constipated. 🤣

    • @nefarioussness
      @nefarioussness Рік тому +180

      "But you're so.... *passes kidney stone* DIFFERENT."

    • @BirdsElopeWithTheSun09
      @BirdsElopeWithTheSun09 Рік тому

      @@RanMouri82 It's a mid nutting voice

    • @wiplash123987
      @wiplash123987 Рік тому +71

      Also anytime Afred was mentioned he was , "Super gay gay gay uncle"

    • @TheEldritchGod
      @TheEldritchGod Рік тому +15

      This is the christmas video I needed

  • @jamesavis1
    @jamesavis1 Рік тому +152

    > Playing Texas Hold 'em
    > Has 5 cards in her hand
    Why do these people insist on writing about things they don't know anything about!?

    • @dante_0962
      @dante_0962 8 місяців тому +4

      Bingo holds 11 aces and a joker card

    • @commanderknee3821
      @commanderknee3821 8 місяців тому +13

      it will make them look cool (it won't)

    • @jacksonconstantine5740
      @jacksonconstantine5740 7 місяців тому +7

      I too like to pick up my winning community cards and flaunt them to other players, totally not getting me kicked off the table

    • @spaciouswest
      @spaciouswest 5 місяців тому +15

      You've never played 5 card Texas Hold 'em? It's right up there with blackjack but at 22 and roulette but every pocket is a different hex code

    • @looinrims
      @looinrims 5 місяців тому +2

      Remember queens wild
      Whatever that means

  • @KingOfTheMonsters07
    @KingOfTheMonsters07 Рік тому +1283

    This is one of the DC Comics of all time. When Bruce Wayne said "I'm gonna get Gotham High" I got Gotham-Chills.

    • @muigokublack6487
      @muigokublack6487 Рік тому +109

      When Jack said "It's Napier Time" I had to take a minute to recover from such masterful writing.

    • @ab-gail
      @ab-gail Рік тому +53

      Beautiful writing by celebrity actress Jennifer Lawrence. So many barriers broken with that line! 😭

    • @Justmyhandle
      @Justmyhandle Рік тому +57

      When Bruce said "Some people think I'm bat-sh*t insane", I clapped at the ingenious use of foreshadowing.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +38

      I creamed when Selina said "I'm a cat, meow". Truly, most moment of mostest.

    • @JamesSchulte
      @JamesSchulte Рік тому +28

      He got the entire city high? Damn

  • @thedarklrd6714
    @thedarklrd6714 Рік тому +116

    I love how the back of the book mentioned bruce's home being an "empty husk" and "haunted by the memory of his parents' murder" but they basically never expand on that, instead focusing on the nonsensical high school romance drama. I know it's a comparatively minor detail, but still

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +20

      Yeah, like we’re his parents lined up and shot? Because all they showed as them getting tied up in the tub.

    • @hosaepalvin9795
      @hosaepalvin9795 4 місяці тому

      and with that knowledge, you TOO can create a high school drama aimed at dumb teenagers!

    • @DMAN99
      @DMAN99 3 місяці тому

      because this probably was a generic high school YA drama the author was working on that they then forced into being Batman related story. Would explain why certain details seem so detached.

  • @XxAegremxX
    @XxAegremxX Рік тому +1262

    This is seriously one of the most underrated projects. Between the mockery of the cast, enthusiasm of the performances and the audacity of Thomas Pitili to call this art. This is good rat.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +34

      Rat? Worse than rat poison, more like.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +99

      I relished every zoomed-in example of terrible drawing. It's shameful this was even published.

    • @keiriver7571
      @keiriver7571 Рік тому +17

      Good 🐀

    • @emerald4splash
      @emerald4splash Рік тому +16

      @@nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 good rat is a meme my friend

    • @Darkestsheltz
      @Darkestsheltz Рік тому +7

      @@emerald4splash what dose good rat mean I know of most efap memes but I've never gotten a explanation to good rat

  • @ericchung3177
    @ericchung3177 Рік тому +209

    Never noticed this before but when Bruce is hit with a dart and Harvey is kidnapped, they don't use a tranquilizer dart, like the kind shot out of a gun, or even a thin little blowgun dart, they hit him with a THROWING dart.
    Like... the kind used for games, with the metal grip section and the big plastic fins in the back.
    Did the author just google "dart" and call it a day?

    • @NocturnePetals
      @NocturnePetals Рік тому +56

      Bold of you to assume they even took the time out of their day to Google anything.

    • @elusivemayfly7534
      @elusivemayfly7534 Рік тому +8

      😂😂😂

    • @Lobsterwithinternet
      @Lobsterwithinternet Рік тому +28

      Look on the bright side: She could of used a lawn dart.
      Now I'm imagining Bruce getting skewered by a foot long dart. 🦞😂😂😂😂

    • @zackerysurrette1580
      @zackerysurrette1580 Рік тому +9

      You are right! That is a game dart! How would that even work?

    • @the_absurd_hero
      @the_absurd_hero Рік тому +7

      @@zackerysurrette1580 Maybe Bruce, in this AU, is like Achilles: He gets hit in the heel and gets one-shotted

  • @lazyliongames6660
    @lazyliongames6660 Рік тому +40

    I love how everytime Bruce talks about Alfred he always refers to him as “gay uncle”

  • @Spartan_5271
    @Spartan_5271 Рік тому +478

    One issue that came up while I was listening to this was that Selena and Joker have a con ring that robs the rich kids of Gotham High, but the author establishes that Bruce left Arkham Prep which was essentially like a school for the rich kids to go to Gotham High. So they are not really robbing the rich, they're just robbing from the wealthiest of Gotham High. So basically the mid to lower class is stealing from one another while the rich are just chilling out

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +78

      Bruh, "one issue"? I'm pretty sure, there's a heckton of lot 'issues' that, anyone come up with, while reading this.

    • @ethanhinton4549
      @ethanhinton4549 Рік тому +74

      @@nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 they were just mentioning one that wasn't mentioned in the video, mate.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +79

      LOL, you're right! They first establish Arkham Prep as the "haves" and Gotham High as the "have nots", but then say the rich and beautiful are worshipped at Gotham High, but then say that Gotham High kids go to exclusive parties and con rich kids in card games?! It's like they're trying to be Gossip Girl without the actual setting.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +7

      @@ethanhinton4549 Oh, sorry.

    • @whiterabbit75
      @whiterabbit75 Рік тому +52

      I find it really telling of the author's feelings that the regular kids went to Gotham, a name associated with a city, while the rich kids went to Arkham, a name associated with an asylum.

  • @jim-bob3093
    @jim-bob3093 Рік тому +1207

    Bruce at 17: flimsy romance and shifty mystery
    Jason at 17: legitimately took over the gotham underworld
    Edit:
    Dick at 17: fighting a intercontinental orange chocolate chip lookin assassin

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +21

      Jason was not 17 when he took over the Gotham underworld

    • @jim-bob3093
      @jim-bob3093 Рік тому +98

      @@GigaChadh976 Depends on your canon. Excluding controdicts, retcons and excluding the film.
      Im going with what was written around that time, rather than stuff retconed in years later (also lost days is trash, bite me! 😜)
      One or two issues after Hush wraps up, Bruce sites that Jason should be 18yr that day(DC #790). BUT, in the batman #25 annual, its stated Jason was only dead for 6 months.
      Therefore his age is offset to be six months younger than he should be (because ya dont age when your dead and all). So, since utrh is only 16 issues after Hush. Either six months pass in that time (which is unlikely since Tim Drake only ages 2yrs in a couple hundreds issues and i dont think its stated or suggested in any material)
      That means Jason has to be 17yr during the events of utrh when he took over he underworld.
      There is a one year time jump after utrh thou, so maybe your thinking of that? Which is when he shows up in Nightwing for the CRIME that is the ' Brother in blood' storyline!
      Edit: spelling
      Edit 2: extra details and issue number checks

    • @Neurodivergent-j1f
      @Neurodivergent-j1f Рік тому +81

      Damian at 11: Trained to fight by the deadliest assassin organization in the world.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +9

      Thanks comic-jesus, that they didn't include them.

    • @captainbeastwinger4940
      @captainbeastwinger4940 Рік тому +1

      @@jim-bob3093 you do realize Jason got trained for a few years after being resurrected

  • @johnarcher6150
    @johnarcher6150 Рік тому +199

    Gossip Girl should never be used as a verb to describe a product.

  • @chiauve868
    @chiauve868 Рік тому +549

    Aside from all the obvious bad things about this comic, rewatching this has me notice that the author was pretty determined to have Selena get the best of both positions of being wealthy and poor. She grew up next door to Bruce, a billionaire, in Gotham's most "exclusive" neighborhood, and so is wealthy and beautiful, with motorcycles and partying all night and wearing nice clothes. She's in financial trouble, sure, but is still closer to being on par with Bruce than any other character and nobody seems to hold that against her like they do him. Because the author and artist emphasize her being "like everyone else".
    Despite said exclusive neighborhood of mansions, her house is always presented as suburban sized, she constantly bemoans being in some lower position, and she attends public school, and Bruce doesn't question that. (A better way to not have him initially not recognize her would be for him to presume she would attend at least a private school and not be at Gotham High, since she's elite like him, not because she's so...*different*. Speaking of, why the fuck is Bruce there too? Alfred couldn't wave money at a nice private school and get him enrolled?) So she gets to have the benefits of being wealthy class while joining everyone else in berating Bruce for it.

    • @benduford3746
      @benduford3746 Рік тому +62

      What a fascinating paradox

    • @TripleBarrel06
      @TripleBarrel06 Рік тому +68

      Yeah sure, if you count trust fund kids as poor. The free ride kids who wrote this certainly do.

    • @italianspiderman5012
      @italianspiderman5012 Рік тому +73

      I like how we’re being constantly told how rich Bruce is and how poor jack is, also, did you know that Bruce is filthy rich and jack is poor af?

    • @iivin4233
      @iivin4233 Рік тому +5

      I just want to save ink. We remember things passed, so, "Rememberance". The subtitle could've stopped there.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +18

      They assumed all the private schools would side with rich bullies instead of a rich anti-bully.

  • @tylercoon1791
    @tylercoon1791 Рік тому +641

    I like how this comic looks like it’s been generated by an AI

    • @Galvatronover
      @Galvatronover Рік тому

      A really shitty AI

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +135

      Don't insult AI like that.

    • @clairejagels9598
      @clairejagels9598 Рік тому +73

      It really does tho!! The writing too- like they fed it riverdale and a dc comic and then it barfed this up

    • @darwinprime
      @darwinprime Рік тому +33

      @@nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Those are some stable diffusion-looking hands, though...

    • @CasualREDACTED
      @CasualREDACTED Рік тому +15

      @@darwinprime don't insult stable diffusion hands like that

  • @darthbiscuit
    @darthbiscuit Рік тому +57

    Having your father believe you died and left alone waiting for death is messed up
    The amount of evil that is cat woman is worse than Joker

  • @SatoruNatara123
    @SatoruNatara123 Рік тому +347

    So much bat symbolism and the fact there are many references to Chinese culture is fascinating. I know this probably wasn't intentional, but with that bat dissection bit in Chapter 2, I still can't believe this came out mid-pandemic.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +91

      Art imitating life, truly. Except instead of the "unspecified virus of unknown origin", Gotham High just killed our brain cells.

    • @Frostbite12211983
      @Frostbite12211983 Рік тому +1

      Ever heard of the Wuhan Lab? Look it up and Anthony Fauci's connection to it.

    • @kingagrabowska9366
      @kingagrabowska9366 Рік тому +1

      @@Frostbite12211983 "Unspecified virus of unknown origin" is a phrase popularized by a UA-camr Critical Drinker as a substitute because using the word Covid in your video could get you in trouble for misinformation because UA-cam is stupid.

  • @skrublordnord69
    @skrublordnord69 Рік тому +569

    It’s like the artists couldn’t draw circles so they made the pepperoni and ham sandwich all squares lmao. This is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a while 😂

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +51

      And mashed-up hands because they couldn't be bothered to draw fingers.

    • @TheReilock
      @TheReilock Рік тому +37

      All these squares make a circle.

    • @SatoruwaFeng
      @SatoruwaFeng Рік тому +21

      I like that you referred to them as "artists"

    • @skrublordnord69
      @skrublordnord69 Рік тому +24

      @@SatoruwaFeng oh you’re right I should’ve said “paid pretenders.” Lol

    • @chazzitz-wh4ly
      @chazzitz-wh4ly Рік тому +1

      The art is so bad. Whoever hired this amateur should ask for their money back.

  • @c-puff
    @c-puff 2 місяці тому +7

    54:23 oh the way mauler says "but WHY" here has irrevocably harmed my vocabulary.

  • @TheArmyOfOne100
    @TheArmyOfOne100 Рік тому +36

    I think we were too busy laughing at headmaster Sanders to realize the little black boy being bullied was RICHARD GRAYSON. Nobody was safe from Gotham High.

  • @hambonejamboree7750
    @hambonejamboree7750 Рік тому +395

    Just so you know, Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance isn’t about motorcycle maintenance, It’s just pretentious.
    They’re not trying to imply they’re into something traditionally male oriented, they’re trying to imply she’s all deep and philosophical. Which is just as lazy.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +103

      But because they show Selina riding a motorcycle and a picture of her deceased mom with a motorcycle, they're also trying to say she's "not like other girls".

    • @SatoruwaFeng
      @SatoruwaFeng Рік тому +56

      I think both of these statements are true

    • @michaelmcarthur2944
      @michaelmcarthur2944 Рік тому +14

      Your insight makes it even funnier

    • @F1rstWorldNomaD
      @F1rstWorldNomaD Рік тому +39

      Id bet good money the author has not read the book and had no fakking idea what its about.
      It just said "Zen" and "Motorcycles" on it.
      Two concepts she wanted to tie to her BS self-insert character.

    • @Laneous14
      @Laneous14 Рік тому +5

      @Bill Clinton Enjoyer I have dated a lot of women over the years, like casually or seriously more than 30 women. I'm not bragging, I'm just telling you that EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. of them told me how they weren't like other girls.

  • @lyravain6304
    @lyravain6304 Рік тому +243

    "I could have solved this by asking for some help but I'd rather be a criminal and maim random kids!" ~Selina Kyle, probably.
    The author really epitomizes the "I'm a psychotic monster, now treat me as your hero" tendency.

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 Рік тому +4

      It's very SAW like isn't it?

    • @kingagrabowska9366
      @kingagrabowska9366 11 місяців тому +15

      Selina:''I need some fresh air.''
      Bruce takes Selina outside on a date around the city.
      Bruce: ''Well, you said you needed fresh air, so . . .''
      Selina: ''What do you know about what I need?''
      Me: Visible confusion.

  • @potlach001
    @potlach001 Рік тому +69

    I love how bruce asks alfred to get the antidotesfor him but the book says there is no antidote in the first line of text

  • @xenomorph6599
    @xenomorph6599 Рік тому +126

    Love how the whole time Bruce, a superhero and feeling super guilt ridden over Harvey's kidnapping and the money his family doesn't have, never considers just... d o n a t i n g some of his money to Harvey's family in the spirit of charity. Probably one of the easiest and legal heroic acts one could do. Solve the whole thing. Hell he's got the money to hire a city's worth of private investigators to catch the HIGHSCHOOLERSSS behind the whole thing. But this plot MAKES NO SENSE ANYWAY SO NEVERMIND HHHHHHHH

    • @TheArmyOfOne100
      @TheArmyOfOne100 Рік тому +14

      This version of Bruce is the way people who hate Batman think he’s written.

  • @AmateurAnimations65
    @AmateurAnimations65 Рік тому +176

    Jack hitting the pancake vape is weirdly hilarious to me, simply because it gives me the mental image of the actual Joker seeing a vape for the first time and getting hyped that it's pancake flavored.

    • @revolvingworld2676
      @revolvingworld2676 Рік тому +22

      Which to be fair is probably in character

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 Рік тому +7

      I'd love to see that happen in canon.

    • @mattmark94
      @mattmark94 11 місяців тому +18

      Joker is gonna hit the vape and then make it disappear like that pencil

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 11 місяців тому +4

      @@mattmark94 Oh that would've been awesome!

    • @panonymousbloom5405
      @panonymousbloom5405 8 місяців тому +6

      This is out of character but I would love to see Joker hit a vape and immediately start coughing and wheezing like he has some grade A asthma.

  • @lisamona6208
    @lisamona6208 Рік тому +202

    I love how they managed to make Selina- THE MAIN CHARACTER the most hateable person ever written.
    Seriously throughout this whole story the author must just have hated writing this book and wanted. Like I really wanted her to kill herself in the end because she was such a asshole like why?
    Why make the character’s only main motive is MONEY the reason why she did all these shit schemes was for MONEY
    So when Bruce can literally offer MONEY to FIX LITERALLY ALL HER PROBLEMS- she says no for LITERALLY NO REASON other than “lol I’m an Independent woMen” like what??? It was so retarded-
    Like why?
    It’s already bad that everyone was raceswapped to the point you could name all the characters differently and nothing would changed. How they’re using the DC named SUPERHEROS to prop up a young adult novel that has literally NO SUPERHEROS in it!
    It’s even worse because this romance book IS A BAD ROMANCE BOOK
    IT HAD ONE JOB-
    I feel so sorry for people invested in the regular superheros to be turned into THIS-

  • @martinw6371
    @martinw6371 Місяць тому +8

    Still one of my favourite yt vids I don't know how many times I've rewatched this. I really hope the author releases a new book so we can get this cast back.

  • @pondoorwastaken
    @pondoorwastaken 7 місяців тому +8

    "I've already taken chemistry and physics! So why am I being forced to take intro biology, a completely different branch of science??"

  • @Vashthestampede967
    @Vashthestampede967 Рік тому +147

    Wait did the nurse never bother consider calling child protective services? Or maybe reach out to family? Like she knows that Selina is basically raising herself in a house that is falling apart with a parent that can't even properly take care of themselves.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +39

      I dunno. Also is Selina’s grandma Alive? If so why doesn’t she just take custody of Selina? Or at least let her use her own money to fix that ramshackle house? And how the fuck does her dad have Alzheimer’s? She said there was a car accident. Alzheimer’s isn’t something you can get from a car accident

    • @kingagrabowska9366
      @kingagrabowska9366 Рік тому +14

      @@GigaChadh976 Maybe it's not Altzheimer's but amnesia after the accident. But the writer can't explain it very well and doesn't seem to know the difference anyway.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +35

      @@kingagrabowska9366 they called it Alzheimer’s though LMAO.
      This is how fucking awful the comic is.

    • @tenkyu778
      @tenkyu778 Рік тому +29

      Reading this comic makes me want to shut off mentally . How do you get Alzheimer's from a car crash? don't they mean amnesia? Why doesn't Selina immediately just ask Bruce the billionaire next door for money considering they are childhood friends? She literally has a reason!, but hey! Maybe I'm reading too much into this mess of a story

    • @Famygdala
      @Famygdala Рік тому +19

      She's not getting paid for that. That child of dubious Latin origins is on her own.

  • @blr5341
    @blr5341 Рік тому +90

    This is one of my favorite things Efap has done. Mauler's voice as bruce is too good.

    • @Lobsterwithinternet
      @Lobsterwithinternet Рік тому +1

      He sounds like that creepy Knuckles in PlagueofGripes’ Sonic Forces video.

  • @evilcrash8683
    @evilcrash8683 Рік тому +312

    If Daniel Kibblesmith's New Warriors *EVER* get released you guys *REALLY* need to fandub the entire time, just like you did with I Am Not Starfire!

    • @frug5629
      @frug5629 Рік тому +54

      I doubt it'll see the light of day. I think even Marvel thought that was too much of an embarrassment.

    • @ab-gail
      @ab-gail Рік тому +28

      @@frug5629Friggin Batgirl’d it

    • @evilcrash8683
      @evilcrash8683 Рік тому +26

      @@frug5629 Children Of The Atoms got "lucky" getting It's release, so I don't see why not and you never know If they still sneak pass by just to embarrass Itself even more.

    • @reginaphalange9417
      @reginaphalange9417 Рік тому +5

      YES !

    • @TwistedTeaRex
      @TwistedTeaRex Рік тому +17

      Wait, they did I am not Starfire!? Hol up, looks like I missed a good one.

  • @dreamiinotdream730
    @dreamiinotdream730 Рік тому +56

    I find it funny that Jack is slightly more respectful of how wrong the love triangle is than Selina and Bruce are. He at least bothered to ask before fucking Selina in his dust n disease riddled home.
    Also Selina plan is incredibly stupid “Let me toy with my two best friends, one of which is rich enough to probably cover the college fund and medical bills of everyone in this school, and then fuck them up mentally to fake my own death and get money to take care of my dad, nevermind how this will affect the rest of my family. Instead of asking RICH KID FOR HIS POCKET MONEY! AFTER HE OFFERED TWICE!” I get trying to be independent and prove yourself or whatever but when you’re dirt poor taking care of someone with severe health problems, you should probably just take the fucking money

  • @voidis
    @voidis Рік тому +251

    17:43 - They picked "Madame Butterfly" for the Waynes to see?! It could have been any other opera out there but NO they had to choose the one where an American naval officer goes to Japan and finds a 'convenient easy' wife and they have a son named Sorrow together before it all ends tragically.

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +102

      Ma-Sha "Martha" Wayne: Isn't it great how we didn't end up like that, honey?
      Thieves: Um....

    • @completelyferrouschemist6776
      @completelyferrouschemist6776 Рік тому +44

      @@RanMouri82 Robbers: "We put her in the tub and she stopped moving, wat do?"

    • @kaelell4697
      @kaelell4697 Рік тому +19

      @@completelyferrouschemist6776 thieves: "call the cops"

    • @froggotheweebo6806
      @froggotheweebo6806 Рік тому +27

      What was ever wrong with them watching Zorro

    • @completelyferrouschemist6776
      @completelyferrouschemist6776 Рік тому +2

      @@froggotheweebo6806 Copyright.

  • @GoBuddieGo
    @GoBuddieGo Рік тому +41

    Mauler’s constant moans when he read his lines made me laugh more than it should.

  • @stephenlanuto5993
    @stephenlanuto5993 Рік тому +199

    YES YES YES!! I watched ever part when it came out and I was dying, moaning mauler and Rags screaming "IT'S QUINOA!!"

    • @danielwilliams7562
      @danielwilliams7562 Рік тому +19

      This whole thing is weirdly quotable and nonstop laughing riot

  • @lacolem1
    @lacolem1 Рік тому +139

    “I need witnesses…”
    But, wouldn’t they be witnesses to you perpetrating a fraud and admitting to kidnapping an innocent kid? Wouldn’t that put your entire plan at risk since your dad would get NOTHING and you’d be liable in a lawsuit from the Dents?😂 This is idiotic!

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому

      Also why the fuck would she leave that money to her fucking dad? He’s a retard at this point. The bank would realize “yeah this guy is in no fucking condition to handle all this money.”

    • @osets2117
      @osets2117 Рік тому +42

      That's the author not knowing anything about laws in any stretch of the words

    • @chazzitz-wh4ly
      @chazzitz-wh4ly Рік тому +11

      The insurance fraud part I find really heinous. Your rich friend is offering to help, no strings attached, but instead elect to commit multiple felonies that can be tied back to you. What?

  • @sebastianrubin7476
    @sebastianrubin7476 8 місяців тому +17

    The fact that she claims to love them, while using them as unknowing witnesses to her feigned suicide.
    Fucking worst Catwoman ever.

  • @KaneMeadowsGaming
    @KaneMeadowsGaming 8 місяців тому +12

    That killed me "I wasnt there for you then...but I am now"-Ancient Gay chinese proverb

    • @doyourbest_uwu
      @doyourbest_uwu Місяць тому

      "HONG DI DONG DONG." - ancient chinese brooding teenager

  • @michaelmcarthur2944
    @michaelmcarthur2944 Рік тому +62

    Man, seems like the moral of the story is that selina is an unempathetic psychopath who wins in every situation. Not much of a moral, or a story, but it's definitely a comic of the all time

    • @chazzitz-wh4ly
      @chazzitz-wh4ly Рік тому +5

      If I was Bruce, I’d just turn her in. She committed multiple crimes, where is his sense of justice now?

  • @testdep
    @testdep Місяць тому +7

    somehow these four Ytubers are better voice actors than many Hollyweird professional actors.

  • @ShadyDoorags
    @ShadyDoorags Рік тому +75

    It's a fun idea that's been done plenty of times to take well known characters and put them in What-If scenarios. "What if Gotham characters were in high school together? OMG, Bruce would be a loner, Selena would be his girlfriend, and commissioner Gordon would be the principle! Ha ha ha, so silly!"
    You know what you don't do when you have this idea? Completely change the characters! If I want to see Bruce Wayne and the Gotham crew in high school, why would you give me kinda-sorta Asianified Bruce Wayne with his gay uncle Alfred and his black friends, the Gordons? Maybe I'm missing context, like this is a prequel to an existing non-canon universe.

    • @kingagrabowska9366
      @kingagrabowska9366 Рік тому +15

      There was supposed to be a show about Batman and all his rouges in high school called ''Gotham High'' but they decided to do Batman Beyond instead. But even if they choose to make Gotham High back in the day it still would've been better than whatever this comic is, kind of like x-men evolution.

    • @BlueBlazeKing
      @BlueBlazeKing Рік тому +13

      @@kingagrabowska9366Actually Gotham High was conceptualized in the late 2000’s, but yeah it definitely would’ve been better than this

  • @jroggs85
    @jroggs85 Рік тому +53

    So many unpredictable twists and turns! But enough about the character facial art...

  • @sol-hunter2332
    @sol-hunter2332 Рік тому +21

    I really want more readings of terrible comics with the gang. This is so much fun lol

  • @funfunfun275
    @funfunfun275 Рік тому +286

    Thanks for stitching them all together. Both are convenient and probably the best way to make people who haven't been watching since part 1 actually consume the whole thing.

    • @Neurodivergent-j1f
      @Neurodivergent-j1f Рік тому +7

      AGREED!!!

    • @MediumRareOpinions
      @MediumRareOpinions Рік тому +8

      Indeed, I missed this when it first launched and only recently got around to watching, it's very convenient.

  • @Mooseshovel
    @Mooseshovel Рік тому +36

    1:40:46 i actually cried at MauLer just soypointing at the corpse, its just the funniest fucking image to me

  • @sinjin8576
    @sinjin8576 Рік тому +216

    This comic is actually massively inspiring and should be a beacon of hope for any aspiring artist.
    I mean if this level of art can be accepted for use with DC A listers (high school variant or not) than anyone who has grown past using crayons has a chance at a major industry job.
    No matter how low your skill DC will still hire you.

    • @osets2117
      @osets2117 Рік тому +32

      I've seen some phenomenal crayon drawings, it's not the implement, it's the artist

    • @kaelell4697
      @kaelell4697 Рік тому +10

      Had us in the first half I'm not gonna lie

    • @NopeNaw
      @NopeNaw Рік тому +18

      "No matter how low your skill DC will still hire you."
      Only if you have enough oppression points, and most of the actually talented people don't.

    • @HerohammerStudios
      @HerohammerStudios Рік тому +10

      I get the joke, but it's honestly just depressing. I mean, what's there to aspire to? If it's all just incompetent shit, then why ever care about the things you make?

    • @lollipopdragon2259
      @lollipopdragon2259 Рік тому +4

      The comic artist Kelly Jones said (on the Real BBC): "Compete with the time you're inspired by, not the time you're in."
      I think it's brilliant words to live by and the perfect approach to creating art in the modern era.

  • @straightjacket308
    @straightjacket308 Рік тому +57

    Mauler and Rags share the same brain but are perfect opposite of each other! The moments of silence after something stupid is red in the comic is just pure gold. Found this video completely by accident and I'm glad I did!

  • @BigIndividual
    @BigIndividual Рік тому +329

    I liked it when Joker said “it’s jokering time” and then joked all over the Gotham High.

    • @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457
      @nnnnmhughuuhhjiijj9457 Рік тому +22

      My sensitive heart crys everytime, whenever I re-read the "My heart is bruced" part and then, it cuts to reveal that he got bruced all over all his body. 😭

    • @BionicleFactory
      @BionicleFactory Рік тому +22

      That's just his wicked sense of humor!

    • @Rayhan1649
      @Rayhan1649 Рік тому +2

      @Bill Clinton Enjoyer you drink water, he drinks anarchy!

    • @Local_stranger889
      @Local_stranger889 Рік тому +1

      @juscbhbhuvsdsdvbhjwsdv3843 he used his clowny powers

    • @chazzitz-wh4ly
      @chazzitz-wh4ly Рік тому +1

      For his “wicked sense of humor” there was zero jokes from that hack.

  • @jackwhite2654
    @jackwhite2654 Рік тому +301

    As an aspiring artist, I didn't want to be too critical of this comic's art, because I'm not that good at it, and it would be hypocritical. However, when I saw the first panel with the joker, I realized I can draw better than these people

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 Рік тому +59

      Meh giving someone legitimate Criticism at something you might not be the best at isn’t hypocritical so I’d say you’re good. :)

    • @RanMouri82
      @RanMouri82 Рік тому +23

      That panel with Selina in the background of the card game, though. 😅

    • @neon_blue4464
      @neon_blue4464 Рік тому +19

      That's exactly what I was thinking 🤣🤣 this is actually making me think I have a chance if something like *this* can get published

    • @jay-b1223
      @jay-b1223 Рік тому +11

      @@RanMouri82 bro that was insanely bad 😂 like the artist must’ve used his non dominant while having a seizure when he drew that

    • @oORiseAboveOo
      @oORiseAboveOo Рік тому +21

      I get that they have deadlines, but the art is so lazy.

  • @sheerbeauty
    @sheerbeauty 6 місяців тому +10

    Mauler's voice for Bruce Wang was great.

  • @PTV77733
    @PTV77733 8 місяців тому +10

    “Is there a lore reason Selina didn’t take Bruce’s handout? Is she stupid?”

  • @graylykan2739
    @graylykan2739 Рік тому +73

    This is it. EFap and JLongbone review Gotham High. In two hours. TWO. HOURS.
    This is a masterpiece.

  • @Belicure
    @Belicure Рік тому +59

    I'm glad this exists actually. Knowing my art ability is above this artist maybe I can aspire to make a better graphic novel than DC or Marvel someday

    • @Baldwin-iv445
      @Baldwin-iv445 Рік тому +4

      You probably could start your own comic business. Y'know something like Original Valiant comics and start a franchise.

  • @AdonanS
    @AdonanS Рік тому +84

    Hold on, why didn't Selina sell some of their things to help pay for her father's care? The house was in the trust fund, but the dining table wasn't, nor her motorcycle. This, coupled with the fact that she obstensibly took all the trust fund money and left her father in Gotham while she parties in Paris leads me to believe she never really cared about him.

    • @GigaChadh976
      @GigaChadh976 Рік тому +29

      Yeah. Like why not play into the catwoman thing where she steals jewelry or something from the parties she attends? Like make her a pick pocket?

    • @chazzitz-wh4ly
      @chazzitz-wh4ly Рік тому +9

      Nothing makes sense. It shows how painfully unintelligent the writer actually is.

    • @trequor
      @trequor 10 місяців тому

      She is a female narcissist. She deserves everything for being close to a sick person

  • @FringeSpectre
    @FringeSpectre Рік тому +34

    Uh, more please? Do "I'm not Starfire" next. That would be a blast to see yall read through.

    • @JLongbone
      @JLongbone  Рік тому +18

      ua-cam.com/users/liveO36VTvcFdyk?feature=share

    • @FringeSpectre
      @FringeSpectre Рік тому +11

      @@JLongbone holy shit nice. Disregard lol

  • @Fatality0999
    @Fatality0999 11 місяців тому +15

    This is honestly my comfort video. I go back to it a LOT. You should do this again.

  • @thekinkypinkies7437
    @thekinkypinkies7437 Рік тому +141

    I love most of your work, but this is still my favorite thing you've made

    • @moomyung9231
      @moomyung9231 Рік тому +11

      My bro recommended it to me, and after it made watch both J and EFAP (the movies and tv, don't care for podcasts).

    • @MediumRareOpinions
      @MediumRareOpinions Рік тому +3

      @@moomyung9231 There are some great highlight videos for the "best bits" of the podcasts.
      For those times you don't have 8 hours but want a good laugh.

  • @pablosauceda5737
    @pablosauceda5737 9 місяців тому +11

    This is always great to comeback to for a good laugh. Hope y’all do something else like this again. Maulers commitment to the bit is gold

  • @odigity
    @odigity 2 місяці тому +8

    Please do this again - I don't care what it is, just any excuse for the four of you to get together and voice-act ridiculous characters and dialog.

  • @metalheadretrogamer5330
    @metalheadretrogamer5330 Рік тому +91

    The queen of response videos and woke media destroyer, gives us the greatest Christmas gift ever! Thank you, JLongbone. Been watching you since the Riley Dennis days.

  • @indigosaturn255
    @indigosaturn255 Рік тому +76

    Am i the only one who's genuinely irritated by selena? I feel like she's the worst/most annoying character in the comic by a long shot. She has all the style and grace of that one girl you knew in school who consistently causes drama and acts like her life is worse than yours, not to mention constantly trying to sound and act comedically edgy

    • @cynicalperson161
      @cynicalperson161 Рік тому +14

      I completely agree. She's literally insufferable 🙄

    • @rainingtacos7529
      @rainingtacos7529 3 місяці тому +1

      Knew a person like that once. Glad I got away from her.

  • @eriktatos
    @eriktatos Рік тому +27

    Mauler needs to voice the next actual Batman

  • @kingawesome5219
    @kingawesome5219 Рік тому +47

    I think we reached a point where Moaning Mauler is a canonical form. I suggest either Gay Mauler or Moanler

  • @mr.e2239
    @mr.e2239 Рік тому +19

    Selena refuses the money she needs when it is offered to her, but plans on stealing that same money from Bruce. Okay, makes sense.

  • @BeryRen
    @BeryRen Рік тому +15

    This is just 2 hours of pure joy. I spent like 4 days with this, like 30 minutes at a time like its a tv show.

  • @awsomegirlpower476
    @awsomegirlpower476 Рік тому +61

    You didn't have to bless us with this, but you did Jay. Now I can watching all the parts without YT stuffing a bunch of unskippable ads in my face!

  • @Book_of_Grudges
    @Book_of_Grudges 8 місяців тому +8

    I think I’ve watched this 15 times and it’s still great.

  • @masteryoraerasante
    @masteryoraerasante 14 днів тому +8

    "I was kidnapped instead of you because I was wearing your jacket, after I asked you to let me wear it! I will now blame you because of it, as if you did it all to change our places!" at least he was kinda traumatized and seemed better later when they met again, but it was still weird.
    But then, at the end...
    "I wanted your money, but I don't want you to give me money as a firend. I wanted to either steal from you or fake my kidnapping for insurance money. But now that you rescued me from it, I'd rather kill myself and let the money go to my sick father that will have it stolen when sent to a home than accept your willing help."
    Also
    Selina: jumps on water acting like she is aiming to die.
    Guys: punch each other instead of jumping in too trying to rescue her.

  • @tristandpc
    @tristandpc Рік тому +38

    "We've been friends since childhood, if you needed money you could've asked."
    "No! I had to steal it from you!"

  • @1SpicyMeataball
    @1SpicyMeataball Рік тому +54

    This upload is both a gift and a curse.
    A curse that this comic exists..
    And a gift that the Longcrew is taking the piss out of it.

  • @mothsbelike
    @mothsbelike Рік тому +16

    According to my mom, who took Latin for 4 years, they did fuck up. There are 5 conjugations for Latin verbs.

  • @shadyminkins5704
    @shadyminkins5704 9 місяців тому +12

    Poison Ivy looks like someone out of an American propaganda cartoon from World War 2.

  • @fatjon7369
    @fatjon7369 Рік тому +48

    You all kill me. I love this shit. I want the comic to keep going for ever.

  • @bowiehunter
    @bowiehunter Рік тому +16

    In other words "I had no clue what to do for Jack, so I just drew myself."

  • @The_Laughing_Cavalier
    @The_Laughing_Cavalier Рік тому +84

    I can't wait for the live action version staring... Jennifer Lawrence.

    • @scottski02
      @scottski02 Рік тому +27

      Fitting casting, since she also wrote Gotham High and invented UA-cam

    • @angbandsbane
      @angbandsbane Рік тому +1

      @@scottski02 And she did it before joining forces with Al Gore to invent the internet.

    • @scottski02
      @scottski02 Рік тому

      @@angbandsbane FYI, For some retarded reason your comment got shadowbanned

    • @NopeNaw
      @NopeNaw Рік тому +4

      She'll be the first female to play Selina Kyle.

    • @AlinaAniretake
      @AlinaAniretake 3 місяці тому

      ​@@NopeNawno, they meant as Bruce Wayne!

  • @evilherodiamondcat
    @evilherodiamondcat Рік тому +58

    The cinematic experience that we've all been asking for.

  • @mechajay3358
    @mechajay3358 Рік тому +21

    Watching this commentary on the comic is a thousand times better than the comic itself.

  • @aesiddoway
    @aesiddoway Рік тому +21

    I haven’t belly-laughed at a video like this in ages. My eyes are watering. Thank you for that. 😂

  • @adamtheriault6743
    @adamtheriault6743 Рік тому +15

    Honestly listening to this trainwreck makes me want to give it a shot myself, writing the scenario i mean
    Batman but high school version
    Batman having to deal with his grief developing distance from the people he needs most and learning to overcome that healthily and naturally
    Catwoman struggling on the line of taking advantage of a vulnerable batman and his money or being a caring friend whos gone through something similar
    Twoface being the quiet kid who knows how to play both sides, basically a background manipulator who makes other people do what he wants, while thinking its their idea
    Joker, the class clown who, through drugs for a mental illness and earlier years of being bullied for that, engages in pranks that entertain the other kids, but over the semesters they get progressively worse and worse, until hes the only one laughing at them
    I could actually see this idea working storywise, with a necessary clarification that its just a spin on batman, and by god having some subtlety

  • @PVEDAYZXB
    @PVEDAYZXB Рік тому +23

    Rags' Alfred voiceover is by far the best ever I've heard. Lol so on point!

  • @Green.Star_ks
    @Green.Star_ks 5 місяців тому +9

    I visited New York over the weekend. I saw the Bethesda foundation and could only think on this stupid book