Still can’t believe there were 4 people who were willing to help support me financially. Thank you!! 😭 I’ve been wanting a pair of AirPod Pros so I can have noise cancelling all day (and not have to wear bulky over-ear headphones especially in the hot summer) for many months now and thanks to your donations soon I will be able to! I’m so grateful www.buymeacoffee.com/alinapumpkin
@@homonoia78 I've had a few people suggest this but I don't think I could handle all that school. I always really despised school, especially when I was in college (and I only did 2 years). Plus don't have the means to fund that at this point in time, but regardless if I did, I think it would be too much for me too take on
That goal of wanting to help people is such a nice and positive one to have, and I know you've definitely helped others by not sugarcoating anything and keeping it real. Loved the pumpkin tour at the end, it made you smile which is awesome! It's always the little things in life that give the most joy. Always wishing the best!
@@ALINApumpkin I know this from my own experience and history.Many great teachers, healers and creative people have gone through difficult times before they became chosen ones. Buddha, Jesus, Eckhart Tolle, Oprah Winfrey, Anthony Robbins, Nelson Mandela, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Ray Charles, Beethoven and Stephen Hawking all overcame great challenges.My mother also developed a paranormal gift and helped people with laying on of hands after going through difficult experiences. And in your case, I know that you are a chosen one, otherwise , you wouldn't be so authentic, empathetic, and aware now, which you likely wouldn't have developed without these hard times. Your videos and accompanying community would never have come into existence. You are a light for people even if you might not realize it yet.but the signs and results are already here and on their way. And you probably think yeah but I didn't chose to live and be like this,but God chose you,remember that.And God and life has his own plan. Most of the times it start with feeling you're a chosen one,and that feeling becomes stronger and then you'll see it in perspective.Like Elvis Presley said;"Almost as a child I always felt something big was gonna happen."
@@ALINApumpkin I know this from my own experience and from history. Many great teachers, healers, and creative people have gone through difficult times before they became chosen ones. Buddha , Jesus, Eckhart Tolle, Oprah Winfrey, Anthony Robbins, Nelson Mandela, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Ray Charles, Beethoven and Stephen Hawking all overcame great challenges. My mother also developed a paranormal gift and helped people with laying on of hands after going through difficult expericiences.And in your case, I know you are a chosen one; otherwise you wouldn't be so authentic, empathetic, and aware now, which you likely wouldn't have developed without these hard times. Your videos and accompanying community would never have come into existence. You are a light for people, even if you might not realize it yet,but the signs and results are already here and on their way.
You have been through a lot; you are so strong because your heart is still loving and willing to help others. Please keep showing us and telling us about what you love and what makes you smile!
Alina, I hope you know there are many of us who are rooting for you. Your story could definitely be inspiration to others who are going through it. I know for me, seeing UA-cam videos of people who are/have gone through fitness journeys have given me meaningful insights. Just goes to show you the power of one person. Best wishes!
Hi Alina! You gave some good inspirational words. You are definitely helping people already and you will help even more people in time to come. Btw, great pumpkins 😊 And I enjoyed the tour of your home. I think the tour was a great idea. Much love to you, Alina 🥰🤗
You're doing a good thing Alina. I have been going through & still struggling but when I came across your channel I felt the connection immediately. Keep Praying & keep pushing.
Hey! Thanks for posting this video! You're right, most people don't talk about their depression while in the thick of it. A few years ago I was in graduate school and had the darkest time of my life. I've never been so low. I talk about it now, but never really did back then. My mental health is a journey I am still walking through, as we all are. It's amazing to me that you're able to be so open and vulnerable like you are in these videos. You're doing great! Loved the section where you talked about your plushies! It's great to have something to make you instantly light up and smile about as you talk about it. It's those little glimpses of hope that will build over time for you. Keep it up!
@@ALINApumpkin I just kept trying my hardest to take care of myself, finding any small reason to be motivated, and allowed myself to process my emotions daily. I started journaling and that helped me a little. I also have a cat and she helps a lot. Not sure if you're in a place that allows animals but if you do, head over to the shelter and adopt! Having a dog or a cat as a companion can help with loneliness and bring joy to your life. And having a little creature to take care of and be responsible for may be what you need. :)
@@ALINApumpkin It's something I still struggle with today but my routine has really helped me get through most days now. For my low point, I was there around a year to a year and a half. It was pretty rough. But I slowly healed enough to be mostly okay.
I feel similar, wanting to help others in life so they don't feel or at least can cope with some of the depressing issues in life. As well as not wanting to own as many positions it can be very flustering to the mind. Thanks for having the courage to post these videos.
YOUR SO AMAZING LITERALLY you wanna help people with depression despite not being in the best condition to do so which is why your amazing. Often times our struggles become our strengths. You can do it because you’ve been thru it. I laughed when you said you didn’t think you would be good enough to help others with depression because thats nonsense. You have a better understanding of your struggles more than any doctor or therapist. They weren’t able to cure it yet your still slowly but surely overcoming it with your own ingenuity. I sucked at art failed every art project I ever did since elementary school I thought I wasn’t creative enough to create my own ideas. I failed art class in high school and always got in trouble. The highest grade i ever got to without failing was 5th grade. I failed 6 7 8 grade and had to go to summer school twice struggled sumwhat through out high school been suspended from every school I’ve ever been. BUT I JUST GRADUATED ON TUESDAY OF THIS WEEK AND NOW IM A FASHION DESIGNER WITH MY OWN BRAND despite my past struggles and “sucking” at art. I FOUND MY OWN WAY MY OWN PATH AND YOU CAN TOO. I believe god has a purpose for all of us and that includes the pain and struggles. I believe god gives us struggles to prepare us for our blessings. I struggled with art now I’m an artist. I struggled with school and now I’m a graduate. Your struggles aren’t a curse it’s preparation for your life’s purpose, goals, and mission. It’s part of your unique story of self discovery, self love, and self acceptance
"These three things will remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love." Love is greater than hope. Continue to change someone else's world for the better by being yourself, Miss. You're doing a great job. :)
Crying can really take it out of you. It's really harsh on your body. I know it can be tough to take care of yourself when you're feeling like this, but it's important to do so. Great that you're doing so much to get better, and that the support you're getting is making a big difference for you 🙂 glad to hear that your sister recovered- many don't. Don't feel bad that people are helping you, never feel bad for that. I do think that you're opening up a space for people to be open and vulnerable. Very few people would have the courage to do what you're doing. Reaching out for help is never easy, and being so honest is really hard especially in such a public space. Keep doing what you're doing, and keep getting better and taking care of yourself ❤ one day you'll see how this is helping people. My dad is like this too....has boxes and boxes of old stuff that he refuses to get rid of, no matter how much I try to help him. It takes up so much space. I still am not sure what to do to help him because I don't want to just throw his stuff out. Anyway, you have a lovely day Alina 😊
@@Dman425I'm not saying it's not helpful to cry. It's good and healthy to cry, and it's healthy to let out those emotions. But anyone who has ever cried for hours knows that it's harsh on your body, it can be painful physically But it's still better than keeping the feelings pent-up inside. So I do agree with you, that you should cry when you need to and it's important that more people embrace that❤
You have a really beautiful apartment. I love all the pumpkins 🎃. I think that a lot of people resonate with your content because you just seem to be a “normal” person that doesn’t feel the need to put on a front. A lot of us have been in this place of darkness. There is nothing wrong with you at all and it’s not your fault. 🤗
Thanks for the video Alina! Of course you are going to be able to help people at some point. I have struggled with mental illness for a long time too and havent been able to hold down a job in different periods. The fact that that is your wish just means you havent given up 💪 and you've got some profound insider knowledge about not being well, which no education can teach you. So be patient with yourself and some day you will be where you want to be. Stay strong 💪
"I understand your pain. Trust me, I do. I've been through it. I've seen people go from the darkest moments in their lives to living a happy, fulfilling life. You can do it too. I believe in you. You are not a burden. You will NEVER BE a burden."Life is a combination of happiness and pain. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. Having a broad perspective on life gives you the strength to move forward through painful times. Know that you are very much needed in this world. With all its infinite possibilities, this life is a gift for it can become a fountain of joy and happiness not just for oneself but for many others as well. Having depression does not mean you are weak, a failure, or worth less than anybody else. Please, don't discriminate against yourself. On your good days, write down your reasons to keep on fighting. Then, on your bad days, read over your list to give you strength.
omg yes re people online talking about their depression but they seem fine - this is why I appreciate your channel so much, you SHOW it! and then we feel less alone.
@@ALINApumpkin I wanna see those Halloween videos too. Maybe you could do livestreams to show people how you like to make them. People these days aren’t too motivated by the whole process so they need some holiday cheer 🦇🥳🎃
Such a good plan!!! You don’t realize already how many people you are helping. Thanks again for being so vulnerable with us, this means a lot❤️ I have a hard time explaining how I feel or if I say it people just dont understand or say don’t be so negative…. 😑 so thanks for being so authentic and real ❤️❤️ also so cute your jack lantern/pumpkin collection haha I gasp when I saw all the orange pumpkin plushies I want ittttt haha
It's funny...as soon as you said you wanted to help others, I was thinking of how you actually were and how you were doing it, then you went and said exactly what I was thinking. You're doing us all a favour with your honest, painful videos; the rest of us wish there were more people like you or we could be like you, so we don't feel like we're going through this alone.
This is the best comment I got today! Thank you! I was about to go to sleep but checking comments one last time before, and seeing this is a wonderful thing before I fall asleep. Thank you
Reeces Candy is a proper (too temporary) sugar fix for me! You have art skills and I think that you would probably like the glow in the dark stuff after you shine a torch on it or those sticks and I do like your poster and stuffie family
Hey, i just stumbled upon your video. you are right , most people won`t show this, you are a very strong person. just wanted to say keep strong and you are not alone in this
@@ALINApumpkin You will ! Im a relationship coach so holler if you need me, plus all of my content and two products are all about helping people find and maximize their future soulmate level lifelong relationship ♥️
"In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life. Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out."
That’s an amazing goal to work towards, to help others that are going through what you’re going through. I believe you definitely will be able to help people and im sure yoi already are. I like jack-o’-lanterns as well :) i’m a big fan of Halloween in general. Also I’m very happy to se you smile :) (seeing you smile made my night)
I like to spend the time with you. You need not be ashamed of talking (so long) when people enjoy your company. I think it is great that you are willing to share as much as you do about your life. I can relate to so much of it as I have been there and am still there. I would tell you to talk to me as long as you want cuz I can relate and share stories which makes people feel less alone with their battles. As far as some others on youtube. I am friends with a young lady on here who now has a huge following. SHe has a bubbly online personality but struggles behind the scenes. BTW I like your shirt. Flashback to early childhood. :) *hugs*
Thanks for giving everyone here the recognition and gratitude. This is going right back to you. All this wouldn't have happened without you. So with that, you also wouldn't be here without you. It's ok to take credit for yourself and what you are doing. This is a great opportunity to learn and grow.
@@ALINApumpkin All my comments come from my own experience and what I have learned from others. Really when you think of it, our own words are not even our own. I'm just passing it forward to you so you can pass it forward to someone else some day. Today will be a great day for you.
I needed a smile today so I fast forward to 8:20 That look to the side and seeing you get excited to show us your 🎃🎃🎃 is adorable and that smile is infectious 😁. Thanks for just being yourself.
@ALINApumpkin Of course! I'm glad you were feeling slightly less unhinged today. And you ARE helping people. Imposter syndrome is a bitch. I could feel the sincerity in your voice when you talked about helping people and that's all that matters ❤️
@@ALINApumpkin YES! One of my favorite Best Buds Video your making brownies and Victoria walks in from behind and you edit it to zoom in on her...that face!!!😂 Love The Best Buds!!!
I hear many ppl say once they start looking at their own emotional health, that they crave to live a more minimalist lifestyle. The phrase from Fight Club, "the things you own, end up owning you", comes to mind. I have also heard the white room thing alot, like life will then be a blank slate or unblemished if the environment matches that viewpoint. This is a fascinating, much more upbeat and more spirited you coming out. Hold onto the feeling! Your personality comes out more each time. Maybe the objects(and not relinquishing them) are like little bookmarks from our history, that we can tie to stories and events, to help us remember our histories/ timelines easier. I think i am guilty of holding onto keep sakes and sentimental objects for the good memories they carry. Nothing wrong with that as long as new memories can be room for too! Discard some of the things that hold you back. You do help people with this vids, but if you continue improving, you will get even better at it! Really nice to see you in a better place. Keep the faith my friend. My favourite pumpkin was the Reece's one, because i am totally addicted to the peanut butter cups😇😂. Have peace and continue finding the happiness!!
I loved everything about this comment!! interesting other people feel similar about the white empty space thing! I hope once I get better I will have the motivation to sell some stuff to have a little extra money and a little less stuff. Reeses cups so gooodddd.... havent had any in months as I'm trying to avoid all processed sugar :( (sugar addict here lol)
I agree with that, B12 is the one supplement I refuse to go without as I eat mostly whole food plant based so am not getting adequate B vit from food sources
Is someone that heavily suppresses their emotions I appreciate you showing the real and authentic. I also appreciate that the thumbnail is of you smiling! 🙂 UA-cam auto generated thumbnails for the win (unless you picked the thumbnail then YOU FOR THE WIN!! 😊)
They absolutely are. They give me something to live for. My most peaceful cful part of day is when I sit on my couch at night and read and respond to comments
I love you Alina, been following since your edibles videos and love getting to know you. I feel like we could be friends in real life, I relate so much to your feelings and can’t wait to see you come out of this even wiser than you already are.
🎃 This is your BEST VIDEO YET 🥳 I loved 9:08 with all the plushes ! My room has plenty of teddy bears and other stuffed animals. Over the past few years I had to start selling lots of old ones because I accumulated huge bags full of them and it was way too many to have. Yes, I am also a bit of a minimalist as well and sometimes it is hard to part ways with some things I just needed to sell to have less to worry about 💆🏻♂️✅ I feel your pain. I have a few dark scary times of my life that I can share today all thanks to overcoming such times and learning from them. It all made me stronger and thats how I can relate to others with my good and bad experiences just as you do. I would LOVE to see you do more artwork and get back on that pole because both activities are SUPER healthy for your mind, body and emotions 🎨🩰 You can even post your new artwork and pole dancing content to teach others your talents. These are skills that many would highly enjoy seeing you do. Your garage seemed very quiet and peaceful. Perhaps parking outside and making an office there would be cozy if the temperature and ventilation is nice in there. Many people have their workstations in the garage for that reason 🧐 I love that lights in your room and the pumpkin decorations. You have so much space and ideas to work with to create very interesting and fun content. Im 100% sure we will enjoy hearing more fun stories and see new artwork along with pole dancing because dancing is a beautiful and healthy way to express oneself and teach others a fun exciting way to exercise as well ♥️ Thank you for the BEST video you’ve made so far. Now I can see the strength and confidence shining through which is inspiring and very refreshing to see. Keep up this new positive momentum and look forward to more fun, relaxed content with plenty of smiles too ☺️🏆
Would a cat help? Dogs would be better (they would make sure you go out) but more work, you would have to stay around to care for it, also social activities of your choice., swimming or light jogging, something to boost your endorphins? Do you have drawings or something you could show us your work, or grow some plants Just suggestions I think you are depressed, not mentally unstable. Big difference
I feeling exactly like you today Alina but not going to give up...taking my jogging shoes out it is 11:10 pm but we need to take care of our weel being so inspired by your Vlog 6 ....Please keep trying Alina...I will keep you posted...
I broke through and I experienced feelings that are indescribable. I was... I was then in a place where where fear didn't exist. But the intensity of it is fucking insane I mean so if that wasn't a goddamn break through what the fuck is breaking through? If that's not a breaking through what the fuck is? you know, really it's how fucking intense it was it's like "good fucking god" And this is probably the worst bit this is the worst bit this is like the most thing I remember about the whole trip is when I burst through something everything just went silent and I mean like not silent as in silent, I mean fucking silent, I mean you would not hear this silence anywhere on this earth. There was no wind like nothing I mean like just dead. And I was in- in nothing I was like in nothing It wasn't even, I couldn't even call it darkness I can't say I was like in like a place of darkness it was nothing, it was literally nothing. And it was like, this lasted for like this felt like it was going on forever ever and actually I just like was like I'm dead, I'm dead I'm dead. By the way I couldn't think, I didn't like think I was dead it was like I was aware that I was dead and I couldn't even think or anything I was just there. There was no feelings there was no bliss no- n- there was no negative feelings no positive feelings. It just was.
Sorry about missing a few days I had my version of a breakdown as well. I love to find you wearing a prince shirt hes the best. I can hear a new found strength in your voice maybe I'm optimistic but I think we're going to make it we can do this friend. with all my love and sopport-kyle
Good to see you smile again in this one:)🫶 And gotta say just sharing your journey through it does help ppl not feel so alone, lets em know they’re not the only ones. You do that for alot of us just as much as some of us do that for you. Thats what this does/can do for many and that in and of itself can be an important thing. And no doubt will even help some start to find help and heal themselves too through it. And when you yourself get to the point of things being all around better, alot of us will still be here no matter what content you choose to do:) We got love for ya Lina and wanna see you make it through and get better🙏 just as much as many of us want and need ourselves to get better ❤️🙏❤️
Have u tried going on some sort of adventure like a rainforest in Brazil just to explore with some friends? Love ur videos Alina hope u can beat depression 💜❤
To me it sounds you want to help other people by give meaning to your mental illness. Even when you believe you're not articulating your feelings well, the feelings you show will resonate with some people. For example, it resonates with me that you want your depression to have some positive meaning to other people. In turn, that is strengthen my believe that my depression also has a positive meaning. And from experience I know it has. You might interpret this assertion as indirect evidence that your mental illness has meaning and purpose 😛
I think I can hear the bass in this one causing you to wear headphones, it sounds like a train next to your house. Unless its just a washing machine or dishwasher running or something 🤔
I've commented before and I'm in the same condition My therapist thinks it could be the Vegas Nerve..controlling our reaction?? We just started talking about it so it's a new journey but might be a reason?? Take as best care as you can
We just discussed it last session I'll talk with her Thursday. I told her I found you on UA-cam and we have the same severe depression/crying. I'll update you on it.❤
I know im going to get the "god doesn't exist" reply, so thanks ahead of time for that. Im not the preacher jumping up and down at 1 am in the morning or bible thumping. I do, however, let my testimonies speak for themselves. Hard to explain in a youtube comment. Heres the cliff notes- 2 years ago. Lots of things happened. Wanted to ki11 myself. Couldnt sleep. (I didnt sleep 3 months straight) called 9 eight eight everyday for months. Was given multiple pills to sleep which didnt work. Drs were and most are useless. Fast forward, 2 years later, sleep completely restored , no pills and im doing a lot better. I still have tough days but nothing like the depression i went through 2 years ago where i literally was depressed to the point i couldnt move, get out of bed, eat , or want to shower. I had "situational depression" due to something I went through. I fall short of God and feel I dont deserve his or anybodys love for that matter BUT he is the only reason i got through what I did. Theres literally no explanation. Not to mention, my friend (brother ive known 20 years) flew in from florida this past week. The pastor in florida gave him permission to baptize me and his mom, who has lung and brain cancer. My friends moms mom said are you sure thats a good idea to go in your condition? She just got out of the icu a couple of days ago and drove 30 minutes with us, and the beach supplied my friends mom with a beach accesbile wheelchair that can roll into the water. I was submerged. His mom was kind of in the water but my friend dumped the water on his moms head with his hands. Her doing this in her condition was miraculous. In conclusion, if you told me 15 years ago that my friend I was jumping rooftop to rooftop with in Chicago, pissing off rooftops and throwing sht at people from rooftops was going to baptize me I wouldve said youre f crazy. With that being said , thank you for reading. I will pray for you.
♥️You are so bloody cute with all your🎃🎃🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃 All the positive things you said about yourself are true🙏♥️~ all the doubts are 💩, and that's the truth.♥️
Still can’t believe there were 4 people who were willing to help support me financially. Thank you!! 😭 I’ve been wanting a pair of AirPod Pros so I can have noise cancelling all day (and not have to wear bulky over-ear headphones especially in the hot summer) for many months now and thanks to your donations soon I will be able to! I’m so grateful
www.buymeacoffee.com/alinapumpkin
Pin this comment. So more ppl can see it
@@bubus682 Good call
@@homonoia78 I've had a few people suggest this but I don't think I could handle all that school. I always really despised school, especially when I was in college (and I only did 2 years).
Plus don't have the means to fund that at this point in time, but regardless if I did, I think it would be too much for me too take on
Keep doing ur videos . Your videos are helping and making a difference in peoples lives. You are important.
That goal of wanting to help people is such a nice and positive one to have, and I know you've definitely helped others by not sugarcoating anything and keeping it real. Loved the pumpkin tour at the end, it made you smile which is awesome! It's always the little things in life that give the most joy. Always wishing the best!
Thank you, that means a lot to me
Alina, you have a community that seriously cares about your well being.
We Love you. Be strong.❤💚❤️
I am so beyond grateful. I don't know what I did to deserve it
You're absolutely able to help other people,that's why you're going so deep right now. You're a chosen one
How do you know this? I have a feeling this is true but I don’t know if that feeling alone is enough to power me though
@@ALINApumpkin I know this from my own experience and history.Many great teachers, healers and creative people have gone through difficult times before they became chosen ones. Buddha, Jesus, Eckhart Tolle, Oprah Winfrey, Anthony Robbins, Nelson Mandela, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Ray Charles, Beethoven and Stephen Hawking all overcame great challenges.My mother also developed a paranormal gift and helped people with laying on of hands after going through difficult experiences.
And in your case, I know that you are a chosen one, otherwise , you wouldn't be so authentic, empathetic, and aware now, which you likely wouldn't have developed without these hard times. Your videos and accompanying community would never have come into existence. You are a light for people even if you might not realize it yet.but the signs and results are already here and on their way.
And you probably think yeah but I didn't chose to live and be like this,but God chose you,remember that.And God and life has his own plan.
Most of the times it start with feeling you're a chosen one,and that feeling becomes stronger and then you'll see it in perspective.Like Elvis Presley said;"Almost as a child I always felt something big was gonna happen."
@@ALINApumpkin I know this from my own experience and from history. Many great teachers, healers, and creative people have gone through difficult times before they became chosen ones. Buddha , Jesus, Eckhart Tolle, Oprah Winfrey, Anthony Robbins, Nelson Mandela, Jiddu Krishnamurti, Ray Charles, Beethoven and Stephen Hawking all overcame great challenges. My mother also developed a paranormal gift and helped people with laying on of hands after going through difficult expericiences.And in your case, I know you are a chosen one; otherwise you wouldn't be so authentic, empathetic, and aware now, which you likely wouldn't have developed without these hard times. Your videos and accompanying community would never have come into existence. You are a light for people, even if you might not realize it yet,but the signs and results are already here and on their way.
Oprah Winfrey? Come on man ...
@@rogerdahmen769 wow thank you so much ❤️
Loveee the jack o lanterns!! Its so heartwarming to see the donations I hope they keep coming! Happy to see another day. Cant wait for day 8 😁
I hope so too! but if not, I am still so grateful!! Going to go buy my AirPods this week! yayyyyy
Alina thank you for making these videos and sharing how you’re feeling. Im struggling mentally and your vids help me deal with my emotions.💜
I’m sorry you’re suffering too, thank you for being here with us
I can tell you have a big heart and are person of character. You should be proud. It took some bravery to put yourself out there and be vulnerable.
This is very sweet, thank you for saying that
You have been through a lot; you are so strong because your heart is still loving and willing to help others. Please keep showing us and telling us about what you love and what makes you smile!
Thank you! as long as there are people like you supporting me with your comments I will never stop making videos!
Alina, I hope you know there are many of us who are rooting for you. Your story could definitely be inspiration to others who are going through it. I know for me, seeing UA-cam videos of people who are/have gone through fitness journeys have given me meaningful insights. Just goes to show you the power of one person. Best wishes!
Alina, you are so special. You will be happy. I'm so happy that you are alive. The world needs you and your kindness.
Thank you Scott
Hi Alina! You gave some good inspirational words. You are definitely helping people already and you will help even more people in time to come.
Btw, great pumpkins 😊 And I enjoyed the tour of your home. I think the tour was a great idea. Much love to you, Alina 🥰🤗
You're doing a good thing Alina. I have been going through & still struggling but when I came across your channel I felt the connection immediately. Keep Praying & keep pushing.
Ok this actually meant so much to me!! I’m so grateful you felt a connection 🧡🩷 thank you for sharing that with me
@@ALINApumpkin You're welcome
Hey! Thanks for posting this video! You're right, most people don't talk about their depression while in the thick of it. A few years ago I was in graduate school and had the darkest time of my life. I've never been so low. I talk about it now, but never really did back then. My mental health is a journey I am still walking through, as we all are. It's amazing to me that you're able to be so open and vulnerable like you are in these videos. You're doing great!
Loved the section where you talked about your plushies! It's great to have something to make you instantly light up and smile about as you talk about it. It's those little glimpses of hope that will build over time for you. Keep it up!
Do you have any pieces of advice on how you got out of your darkest period?
@@ALINApumpkin I just kept trying my hardest to take care of myself, finding any small reason to be motivated, and allowed myself to process my emotions daily. I started journaling and that helped me a little. I also have a cat and she helps a lot. Not sure if you're in a place that allows animals but if you do, head over to the shelter and adopt! Having a dog or a cat as a companion can help with loneliness and bring joy to your life. And having a little creature to take care of and be responsible for may be what you need. :)
@@SaxyButters how long did it take you to get out of it?
@@ALINApumpkin It's something I still struggle with today but my routine has really helped me get through most days now. For my low point, I was there around a year to a year and a half. It was pretty rough. But I slowly healed enough to be mostly okay.
@@SaxyButters I hope you continue to get better 🧡💜
Was not expecting the house tour 😄 Love your pumpkin collection 🎃. I'm so happy to see you doing a little better today. Sending warm hugs ❤
Thanks for the toasty hugs
Stay strong, the negativity comes in waves. Btw, it's ok to not be normal.
I feel similar, wanting to help others in life so they don't feel or at least can cope with some of the depressing issues in life. As well as not wanting to own as many positions it can be very flustering to the mind. Thanks for having the courage to post these videos.
And thank you for commenting and supporting me
YOUR SO AMAZING LITERALLY you wanna help people with depression despite not being in the best condition to do so which is why your amazing. Often times our struggles become our strengths. You can do it because you’ve been thru it. I laughed when you said you didn’t think you would be good enough to help others with depression because thats nonsense. You have a better understanding of your struggles more than any doctor or therapist. They weren’t able to cure it yet your still slowly but surely overcoming it with your own ingenuity. I sucked at art failed every art project I ever did since elementary school I thought I wasn’t creative enough to create my own ideas. I failed art class in high school and always got in trouble. The highest grade i ever got to without failing was 5th grade. I failed 6 7 8 grade and had to go to summer school twice struggled sumwhat through out high school been suspended from every school I’ve ever been. BUT I JUST GRADUATED ON TUESDAY OF THIS WEEK AND NOW IM A FASHION DESIGNER WITH MY OWN BRAND despite my past struggles and “sucking” at art. I FOUND MY OWN WAY MY OWN PATH AND YOU CAN TOO. I believe god has a purpose for all of us and that includes the pain and struggles. I believe god gives us struggles to prepare us for our blessings. I struggled with art now I’m an artist. I struggled with school and now I’m a graduate. Your struggles aren’t a curse it’s preparation for your life’s purpose, goals, and mission. It’s part of your unique story of self discovery, self love, and self acceptance
Thank you so much for this it was so sweet
@@ALINApumpkin thank you. You too💙
You do help me with these videos. You make me feel less alone in the darkness.
That is really meaningful to me. thank you for telling me that. I hope things get better for you
@@ALINApumpkin ❤️
"This is the START of that journey" 👏👏👏👏💯
😭❤️
"These three things will remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."
Love is greater than hope. Continue to change someone else's world for the better by being yourself, Miss. You're doing a great job. :)
Thank you
Crying can really take it out of you. It's really harsh on your body. I know it can be tough to take care of yourself when you're feeling like this, but it's important to do so. Great that you're doing so much to get better, and that the support you're getting is making a big difference for you 🙂 glad to hear that your sister recovered- many don't. Don't feel bad that people are helping you, never feel bad for that. I do think that you're opening up a space for people to be open and vulnerable. Very few people would have the courage to do what you're doing. Reaching out for help is never easy, and being so honest is really hard especially in such a public space. Keep doing what you're doing, and keep getting better and taking care of yourself ❤ one day you'll see how this is helping people.
My dad is like this too....has boxes and boxes of old stuff that he refuses to get rid of, no matter how much I try to help him. It takes up so much space. I still am not sure what to do to help him because I don't want to just throw his stuff out.
Anyway, you have a lovely day Alina 😊
@@Dman425I'm not saying it's not helpful to cry. It's good and healthy to cry, and it's healthy to let out those emotions. But anyone who has ever cried for hours knows that it's harsh on your body, it can be painful physically
But it's still better than keeping the feelings pent-up inside. So I do agree with you, that you should cry when you need to and it's important that more people embrace that❤
I love your plants. ❤ And pumpkins too. And that tiny black kitten.
Thank you!! I love that tiny little soft furry kitten! I got her from Goodwill for like $2
You have a really beautiful apartment. I love all the pumpkins 🎃.
I think that a lot of people resonate with your content because you just seem to be a “normal” person that doesn’t feel the need to put on a front.
A lot of us have been in this place of darkness. There is nothing wrong with you at all and it’s not your fault.
🤗
Thanks for the video Alina! Of course you are going to be able to help people at some point. I have struggled with mental illness for a long time too and havent been able to hold down a job in different periods. The fact that that is your wish just means you havent given up 💪 and you've got some profound insider knowledge about not being well, which no education can teach you. So be patient with yourself and some day you will be where you want to be. Stay strong 💪
I hope so! Thank you Oliver 💜🤗
"I understand your pain. Trust me, I do. I've been through it. I've seen people go from the darkest moments in their lives to living a happy, fulfilling life. You can do it too. I believe in you. You are not a burden. You will NEVER BE a burden."Life is a combination of happiness and pain. Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional. Having a broad perspective on life gives you the strength to move forward through painful times. Know that you are very much needed in this world. With all its infinite possibilities, this life is a gift for it can become a fountain of joy and happiness not just for oneself but for many others as well. Having depression does not mean you are weak, a failure, or worth less than anybody else. Please, don't discriminate against yourself. On your good days, write down your reasons to keep on fighting. Then, on your bad days, read over your list to give you strength.
Your comment encouraged me, thank you
*nodding*, I am proud of you ALINA ; yes you CAN and have the capacity help people. God bless you🙏
Thank you my sweet pita 🥙
You're doing great, keep pushing through. I'm glad to hear you're feeling a bit more balanced.
Of course you can help people Alina
I'm really glad you think so
You've brought so much information and happiness to my life, I have to be here for you.
I appreciate you being here for me Lady DJ
omg yes re people online talking about their depression but they seem fine - this is why I appreciate your channel so much, you SHOW it! and then we feel less alone.
Thank you for confirming what I am doing helps in some way 🧡 it means a lot to me
I LOVE this video. It is inspiring!
You dont see it or understand it right now Alina but what you did here in this video IS the way forward.
Can you expand on what you mean?
I expanded on discord :)
@@kj_______ omg I totally forgot about discord 😭
Its a voice message i put in 'general' (if you cant find it you can accept my friend request and i will send it directly to you :)
Come October you'll have to show us an awesome Jack-o-lantern design you created. Im guessing you must be good at making them 😊.
I enjoy the very standard jack o lantern face with triangle eyes and nose and 3 tooth mouth, perfection
@@ALINApumpkin I wanna see those Halloween videos too. Maybe you could do livestreams to show people how you like to make them. People these days aren’t too motivated by the whole process so they need some holiday cheer 🦇🥳🎃
Such a good plan!!! You don’t realize already how many people you are helping. Thanks again for being so vulnerable with us, this means a lot❤️ I have a hard time explaining how I feel or if I say it people just dont understand or say don’t be so negative…. 😑 so thanks for being so authentic and real ❤️❤️
also so cute your jack lantern/pumpkin collection haha I gasp when I saw all the orange pumpkin plushies I want ittttt haha
Thank you so much!!! Thank you for your kindness and support ❤️
Wish I could give you one of my plushies
I have insomnia depression, anxiety , panic, etc and when im in one it feels like it will never end and that nobody feels as bad as me.
I also have all those things :( I’m sad we both feel this way
It's funny...as soon as you said you wanted to help others, I was thinking of how you actually were and how you were doing it, then you went and said exactly what I was thinking. You're doing us all a favour with your honest, painful videos; the rest of us wish there were more people like you or we could be like you, so we don't feel like we're going through this alone.
This is the best comment I got today! Thank you! I was about to go to sleep but checking comments one last time before, and seeing this is a wonderful thing before I fall asleep. Thank you
@@ALINApumpkin You know you're doing well when you can get someone as disillusioned as me to say something positive, so thanks for that.
Reeces Candy is a proper (too temporary) sugar fix for me!
You have art skills and I think that you would probably like the glow in the dark stuff after you shine a torch on it or those sticks and I do like your poster and stuffie family
@@Dman425 one piece of dark chocolate might be good
Hey, i just stumbled upon your video. you are right , most people won`t show this, you are a very strong person. just wanted to say keep strong and you are not alone in this
I appreciate you deciding to comment and support me :) thank you
You are authentic and you are caring that’s why I continue to support you. We must treasure special people like you 🤗🎃🧡
Well I know you are my forever supporter
@@ALINApumpkin
🇺🇸🛫☁️☁️☁️🛬🇨🇦🏠🤗🎃🧡 🤪
@@ALINApumpkin You will ! Im a relationship coach so holler if you need me, plus all of my content and two products are all about helping people find and maximize their future soulmate level lifelong relationship ♥️
@@perfectsoulmates2023 I hope to have romantic love one day
@@ALINApumpkin You will Alina 🎃♥️
5:23 there's your purpose! This how it starts. So proud of you! ❤
"In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.
Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out."
I love this quote, I remember the first time I saw it on Reddit it really helped me when grieving
That’s an amazing goal to work towards, to help others that are going through what you’re going through. I believe you definitely will be able to help people and im sure yoi already are. I like jack-o’-lanterns as well :) i’m a big fan of Halloween in general. Also I’m very happy to se you smile :) (seeing you smile made my night)
Thank you for the encouragement and kind words Michael
Happy to see a new video from you and I pray you will be better soon !
Thank you for praying
I like to spend the time with you. You need not be ashamed of talking (so long) when people enjoy your company. I think it is great that you are willing to share as much as you do about your life. I can relate to so much of it as I have been there and am still there. I would tell you to talk to me as long as you want cuz I can relate and share stories which makes people feel less alone with their battles. As far as some others on youtube. I am friends with a young lady on here who now has a huge following. SHe has a bubbly online personality but struggles behind the scenes. BTW I like your shirt. Flashback to early childhood. :) *hugs*
🩷🎃💜🧡🎃❤️
It made me so happy when you smiled at 8:07.
Thanks for giving everyone here the recognition and gratitude. This is going right back to you. All this wouldn't have happened without you. So with that, you also wouldn't be here without you. It's ok to take credit for yourself and what you are doing. This is a great opportunity to learn and grow.
A big thanks to you personally because you have left so many kind and encouraging comments on my videos!! Thank you
@@ALINApumpkin All my comments come from my own experience and what I have learned from others. Really when you think of it, our own words are not even our own. I'm just passing it forward to you so you can pass it forward to someone else some day. Today will be a great day for you.
I needed a smile today so I fast forward to 8:20 That look to the side and seeing you get excited to show us your 🎃🎃🎃 is adorable and that smile is infectious 😁. Thanks for just being yourself.
Thanks Fabi
Whoa! I didn't know you had so many pumpkins! I love your collection 🎃🤎
My own pumpkin patch 🎃 hehe I also have a jack-o-lantern tattoo
@@ALINApumpkin Ooo! I'd love to see the tattoo 🤩
@@spacevspitch4028 I will show it in a video soon on a day when I'm holding myself together haha
@ALINApumpkin Of course! I'm glad you were feeling slightly less unhinged today. And you ARE helping people. Imposter syndrome is a bitch. I could feel the sincerity in your voice when you talked about helping people and that's all that matters ❤️
@@spacevspitch4028 it means a lot to me that you think I am helping people 🩷 thank you my space friend 🪐☄️👽🛸🔭
I believe in u genuinely
That means a lot to me
I luv ur jack o lanterns u could try drawing sum like painting or something. Its cool. My mom luvs plushies 2
Thank you for the good news aboot Victoria.
Keep up the videos...your worth it and everything is gonna be fine.
Stay Army Strong ⭐
omg you remember her name???? that's crazy! and yes I am blessed everyday that she is healthy and here with me
@@ALINApumpkin YES! One of my favorite Best Buds Video your making brownies and Victoria walks in from behind and you edit it to zoom in on her...that face!!!😂
Love The Best Buds!!!
God Bless you for sharing. Living in a cardboard box on Venice Beach might be ok for one day!
I hear many ppl say once they start looking at their own emotional health, that they crave to live a more minimalist lifestyle. The phrase from Fight Club, "the things you own, end up owning you", comes to mind. I have also heard the white room thing alot, like life will then be a blank slate or unblemished if the environment matches that viewpoint. This is a fascinating, much more upbeat and more spirited you coming out. Hold onto the feeling! Your personality comes out more each time. Maybe the objects(and not relinquishing them) are like little bookmarks from our history, that we can tie to stories and events, to help us remember our histories/ timelines easier. I think i am guilty of holding onto keep sakes and sentimental objects for the good memories they carry. Nothing wrong with that as long as new memories can be room for too! Discard some of the things that hold you back. You do help people with this vids, but if you continue improving, you will get even better at it! Really nice to see you in a better place. Keep the faith my friend. My favourite pumpkin was the Reece's one, because i am totally addicted to the peanut butter cups😇😂. Have peace and continue finding the happiness!!
I loved everything about this comment!! interesting other people feel similar about the white empty space thing! I hope once I get better I will have the motivation to sell some stuff to have a little extra money and a little less stuff.
Reeses cups so gooodddd.... havent had any in months as I'm trying to avoid all processed sugar :( (sugar addict here lol)
@@ALINApumpkin Yeah im trying to cut the sugar down too! Tremendous buddy!
@@sebblackmore3697 you can do it! 💜
I’m glad you feel better
I read somewhere that lack of B12 can also cause mental health problems.
I agree with that, B12 is the one supplement I refuse to go without as I eat mostly whole food plant based so am not getting adequate B vit from food sources
Jackolantern clan! 8:09. You have a beautiful smile, dude! You're still in there, Alina.
the best username here 🎃💛🎃💜🎃
and thank you
Is someone that heavily suppresses their emotions I appreciate you showing the real and authentic. I also appreciate that the thumbnail is of you smiling! 🙂 UA-cam auto generated thumbnails for the win (unless you picked the thumbnail then YOU FOR THE WIN!! 😊)
Thank you for sharing that with me
I am so sorry. I hope and pray for you to get better. I hope these comments are helpful in some or the other way...
They absolutely are. They give me something to live for. My most peaceful cful part of day is when I sit on my couch at night and read and respond to comments
Day 6. We're following closely.
I appreciate that ❤
reppin tha revolution 💜
☔️💜
Good to you're doing better. On a side note, i love your music taste. I've got the same Prince shirt and MJ is my favourite artists ever haha
MJ and Prince are my favorites and always hold a special place in my heart since I discovered them when I was 13
I love you Alina, been following since your edibles videos and love getting to know you. I feel like we could be friends in real life, I relate so much to your feelings and can’t wait to see you come out of this even wiser than you already are.
🎃 This is your BEST VIDEO YET 🥳 I loved 9:08 with all the plushes ! My room has plenty of teddy bears and other stuffed animals. Over the past few years I had to start selling lots of old ones because I accumulated huge bags full of them and it was way too many to have. Yes, I am also a bit of a minimalist as well and sometimes it is hard to part ways with some things I just needed to sell to have less to worry about 💆🏻♂️✅
I feel your pain. I have a few dark scary times of my life that I can share today all thanks to overcoming such times and learning from them. It all made me stronger and thats how I can relate to others with my good and bad experiences just as you do. I would LOVE to see you do more artwork and get back on that pole because both activities are SUPER healthy for your mind, body and emotions 🎨🩰
You can even post your new artwork and pole dancing content to teach others your talents. These are skills that many would highly enjoy seeing you do. Your garage seemed very quiet and peaceful. Perhaps parking outside and making an office there would be cozy if the temperature and ventilation is nice in there. Many people have their workstations in the garage for that reason 🧐
I love that lights in your room and the pumpkin decorations. You have so much space and ideas to work with to create very interesting and fun content. Im 100% sure we will enjoy hearing more fun stories and see new artwork along with pole dancing because dancing is a beautiful and healthy way to express oneself and teach others a fun exciting way to exercise as well ♥️
Thank you for the BEST video you’ve made so far. Now I can see the strength and confidence shining through which is inspiring and very refreshing to see. Keep up this new positive momentum and look forward to more fun, relaxed content with plenty of smiles too ☺️🏆
this was such a lovely upbeat comment, you sure have a lot of positivity in you! thank you for sharing it with me
I wish the best for you
Thank you Derek
Would a cat help? Dogs would be better (they would make sure you go out) but more work, you would have to stay around to care for it, also social activities of your choice., swimming or light jogging, something to boost your endorphins?
Do you have drawings or something you could show us your work, or grow some plants
Just suggestions
I think you are depressed, not mentally unstable. Big difference
I appreciate that you don't think I'm mentally unstable, that actually means a lot because at times I do worry
I feeling exactly like you today Alina but not going to give up...taking my jogging shoes out it is 11:10 pm but we need to take care of our weel being so inspired by your Vlog 6 ....Please keep trying Alina...I will keep you posted...
Absolutely keep me posted!! Glad to hear you're out walking/jogging! We can do this!
we wish u amazing sunny days
thank you
I broke through and I experienced feelings that are indescribable. I was... I was then in a place where where fear didn't exist. But the intensity of it is fucking insane I mean so if that wasn't a goddamn break through what the fuck is breaking through? If that's not a breaking through what the fuck is? you know, really it's how fucking intense it was it's like "good fucking god" And this is probably the worst bit this is the worst bit this is like the most thing I remember about the whole trip is when I burst through something everything just went silent and I mean like not silent as in silent, I mean fucking silent, I mean you would not hear this silence anywhere on this earth. There was no wind like nothing I mean like just dead. And I was in- in nothing I was like in nothing It wasn't even, I couldn't even call it darkness I can't say I was like in like a place of darkness it was nothing, it was literally nothing. And it was like, this lasted for like this felt like it was going on forever ever and actually I just like was like I'm dead, I'm dead I'm dead. By the way I couldn't think, I didn't like think I was dead it was like I was aware that I was dead and I couldn't even think or anything I was just there. There was no feelings there was no bliss no- n- there was no negative feelings no positive feelings. It just was.
Many neighbours may not understand/care unless they experience being in your shoes...
Yeah they’re an end unit and I’m a super quiet neighbour, so I don’t think they care because they don’t understand
Sorry about missing a few days I had my version of a breakdown as well. I love to find you wearing a prince shirt hes the best. I can hear a new found strength in your voice maybe I'm optimistic but I think we're going to make it we can do this friend.
with all my love and sopport-kyle
Hi Kyle, I'm so sorry you've been having a difficult few days, I hope things are looking up. No worries about missing some, I'm just glad you're back
Best update ever! ❤
Good to see you smile again in this one:)🫶
And gotta say just sharing your journey through it does help ppl not feel so alone, lets em know they’re not the only ones. You do that for alot of us just as much as some of us do that for you. Thats what this does/can do for many and that in and of itself can be an important thing. And no doubt will even help some start to find help and heal themselves too through it.
And when you yourself get to the point of things being all around better, alot of us will still be here no matter what content you choose to do:)
We got love for ya Lina and wanna see you make it through and get better🙏 just as much as many of us want and need ourselves to get better
❤️🙏❤️
this meant so sooo much to me!!!! Thank you 💜
gold by britt Nicole is a very uplifting song
I always listen to this song whenever I feel down. It really helps!
I'll listen now!
brave by sara Bareilles
Hope you are having a good day
Love the shirt
I've had better! Thanks for checking in
Saw your latest video
Can't believe your neighbor would treat you so bad
PSS...the Smile at 8:53 is the Bomb.
That's what we want to see more🙂
Have u tried going on some sort of adventure like a rainforest in Brazil just to explore with some friends? Love ur videos Alina hope u can beat depression 💜❤
That does sound fun!! maybe when I have more money and stabilize my mental health
UNFORTUNATELY SOME OF YOUR NEIGHBOURS MAY BE HARD/COLD/FUNCTIONAL/INSENSITIVE etc.
wish they werent
Praise King Jesus for small victories ❤️
I love king Jesus 🩷
@@ALINApumpkin Praise God!
"No man can come to me, except the Father which hath sent me draw him: and I will raise him up at the last day." John 6:44
Have you ruled out PMDD?
I've been diagnosed with PMDD, it destroys my life, the entire luteal period, from ovulation to first bleed
💛
💛
I wish I had a pumpkin plush toy 😢
they are the cutest! I wish I could give you one of mine 🎃
To me it sounds you want to help other people by give meaning to your mental illness. Even when you believe you're not articulating your feelings well, the feelings you show will resonate with some people. For example, it resonates with me that you want your depression to have some positive meaning to other people. In turn, that is strengthen my believe that my depression also has a positive meaning. And from experience I know it has.
You might interpret this assertion as indirect evidence that your mental illness has meaning and purpose 😛
What you are saying is, exactly, how I feel. I need to make this mental illness and pain worth it (by using it to fuel me to help others)
I think I can hear the bass in this one causing you to wear headphones, it sounds like a train next to your house. Unless its just a washing machine or dishwasher running or something 🤔
in this case it's just the dishwasher. If the bass was that bad I would've moved out long ago haha
I've commented before and I'm in the same condition
My therapist thinks it could be the Vegas Nerve..controlling our reaction??
We just started talking about it so it's a new journey but might be a reason??
Take as best care as you can
What did she suggest you do if that were the issue?
We just discussed it last session
I'll talk with her Thursday. I told her I found you on UA-cam and we have the same severe depression/crying.
I'll update you on it.❤
@@MargaretMannone I can’t tell you how flattered I am that you brought me up in your therapy session. Yes! Please keep me updated
This is the best video out of the 7 videos.
Because I’m the least sad? Haha
@@ALINApumpkin YES. You know me. Haha
You have a cute extended family😁
Love youuu 🌹🧡
thanks for the love 💕
Alina i love to see you smile ur so cute keep it up you beutiful soul we love u
Thank you 🩷
@@ALINApumpkin ❤️❤️🥰
House tour? Ur crib looks cool
Thank you 🩷
The thumbnail 👌
UA-cam autogenerated it too which was pretty awesome 🤗🧡🩷
@@ALINApumpkin a win is a win 🏆🙌
Alina you are great star and you are our best celebrity Alina!❤😊🙏😘
Celebrity is quite a stretch but I'll take it haha
@@ALINApumpkin 🤣😂🤦❤️😁
Have you tried going back on the creatine like we discussed a couple weeks ago? Stay beautiful…. 🌹
Yes! Creatine everyday!!
@@ALINApumpkin 💕
Hey I kinda look like a Jack o lantern so I guess it works out 😅 have you tried supplements? Magnesium, Zinc, Vitamin D, L-Theanine?
I am so curious what a human jack-o’-lantern looks like
@@ALINApumpkin IT ME 😅
be just and fear not
Hey sometimes you help us, sometimes we help you ;)
I know im going to get the "god doesn't exist" reply, so thanks ahead of time for that. Im not the preacher jumping up and down at 1 am in the morning or bible thumping. I do, however, let my testimonies speak for themselves. Hard to explain in a youtube comment. Heres the cliff notes- 2 years ago. Lots of things happened. Wanted to ki11 myself. Couldnt sleep. (I didnt sleep 3 months straight) called 9 eight eight everyday for months. Was given multiple pills to sleep which didnt work. Drs were and most are useless. Fast forward, 2 years later, sleep completely restored , no pills and im doing a lot better. I still have tough days but nothing like the depression i went through 2 years ago where i literally was depressed to the point i couldnt move, get out of bed, eat , or want to shower. I had "situational depression" due to something I went through. I fall short of God and feel I dont deserve his or anybodys love for that matter BUT he is the only reason i got through what I did. Theres literally no explanation. Not to mention, my friend (brother ive known 20 years) flew in from florida this past week. The pastor in florida gave him permission to baptize me and his mom, who has lung and brain cancer. My friends moms mom said are you sure thats a good idea to go in your condition? She just got out of the icu a couple of days ago and drove 30 minutes with us, and the beach supplied my friends mom with a beach accesbile wheelchair that can roll into the water. I was submerged. His mom was kind of in the water but my friend dumped the water on his moms head with his hands. Her doing this in her condition was miraculous. In conclusion, if you told me 15 years ago that my friend I was jumping rooftop to rooftop with in Chicago, pissing off rooftops and throwing sht at people from rooftops was going to baptize me I wouldve said youre f crazy. With that being said , thank you for reading. I will pray for you.
Maybe have sum1 else sell the shit u don’t want n split the money 50 50 with them
true
listening to the song i believe by Shawn Mendes 😊
I will also listen to this!
Sending lots of love sweet baby. I love you
thank you for the love
♥️You are so bloody cute with all your🎃🎃🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃♥️🎃
All the positive things you said about yourself are true🙏♥️~
all the doubts are 💩, and that's the truth.♥️
I'm glad you like my little patch 🎃 💛🎃
Okay. No joke. I'm sorry if I came across as mean. I didn't mean to. I'm sorry. I hope you get better. Sorry.
Hey! I don't see any other comments from you so not sure what you are referring to but it's ok whatever it was I'm sure you meant well
@ALINApumpkin it's all good. Depression really does suck. I've been there. I hope you find the peace of mind you're looking for. Don't give up.
Inositol and niacin.