Emotional Healing | My Experience and Advice

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  • Опубліковано 1 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 1,6 тис.

  • @CreazyThing
    @CreazyThing 4 роки тому +2048

    "If this is really my person, this wouldn't be happening": this is such a good sentence to remind yourself when you feel like you want to go back to someone who hurt you...

    • @nofakk0
      @nofakk0 4 роки тому +109

      @@SR-ql9he About as much of nonsense as your statement is. If your love is hurting you, it's not love, it's a delusion and/or the fear of being alone. This is situational, but telling someone they should suck up hurt, because "people make mistakes" and "love is not a fairy tale" it not only stupid, it's reckless and possibly dangerous.

    • @shruti5731
      @shruti5731 4 роки тому +57

      @@SR-ql9he lol ofc not everything is a fairytale, but it's almost always true that if someone dumps you out of the blue while you're wedding planning, they're probably not going to be your person for life...

    • @angela21947ify
      @angela21947ify 4 роки тому +1

      I totally resonate !!

    • @anujipapu86
      @anujipapu86 4 роки тому +1

      You don’t know how much this has helped me, thank you for sharing this video🙏🏽

    • @katesquirt
      @katesquirt 4 роки тому +16

      @@SR-ql9he I think this is difficult to judge without all of the information. Love isn’t always a fairytale and sometimes it does get messy and you push through but given we don’t have (nor are we entitled to) the whole story, I think Niomi is completely justified in saying that her “person” wouldn’t be hurting her like he did. None of us know what happened behind closed doors.

  • @sophiewalker-walsh
    @sophiewalker-walsh 4 роки тому +461

    One thing I found really helped me through trauma was going to the local observatory and looking through lots of telescopes at stars, galaxies and planets. The scale of space. The insignificance of earth. The insignificance of time. It helped me so much to put perspective on my life and my existence. It is such a miracle to even exist. Life is unpredictable and we have no control.

    • @sbiiine
      @sbiiine 4 роки тому +9

      So interesting because when I was going through a break up, I always looked out the window at night and took a few deep breaths. And I thought very similar things as you: how small this world is and how fascinating space is.

    • @pennyd3220
      @pennyd3220 3 роки тому +6

      i agree about not being in control, we think we are in control of our paths but there is definitely a 'higher plan' for us all.

    • @Ruthhmorris
      @Ruthhmorris 3 роки тому +1

      What a beautiful concept 💖

    • @jaipanesar6027
      @jaipanesar6027 3 роки тому

      🙌🏽

  • @marinalukic1070
    @marinalukic1070 4 роки тому +1231

    When she was talking about trying on wedding dresses and then two days later the breakup happened I started sobbing 😭 you’re so brave Nims ❤️❤️

    • @kdlee3316
      @kdlee3316 4 роки тому +27

      Why did they break up?

    • @gemmaross1665
      @gemmaross1665 4 роки тому +3

      That’s when I started too!! 😢💕

    • @SilviaOdler
      @SilviaOdler 4 роки тому +6

      @@kdlee3316 it may be that he wanted to go back to India?..as they meant to be there for 1,2 years before covid happened?

    • @pebblesmiller9026
      @pebblesmiller9026 4 роки тому +15

      @@kdlee3316 he was hungry

    • @MyChemicalRomace123
      @MyChemicalRomace123 4 роки тому +7

      @@SilviaOdler he actually lost his job due to COVID I think!

  • @360shadowmoon
    @360shadowmoon 4 роки тому +599

    I can't believe he waited until you were at the stage of trying on wedding dresses before saying anything. You're right that he is definitely not the one.

    • @ayseturkoglu1061
      @ayseturkoglu1061 4 роки тому +36

      Can you explain what actually happened? I guess I haven’t been paying attention to what’s going on on the internet these past months so I completely missed what happened. If you know could you please help?

    • @madebyluv
      @madebyluv 4 роки тому

      @@ayseturkoglu1061 same

    • @hann_0497
      @hann_0497 4 роки тому +4

      @@ayseturkoglu1061 yeah I’d like to know too I’m nosey

    • @360shadowmoon
      @360shadowmoon 4 роки тому +1

      @@ayseturkoglu1061 Her and Joe broke up and are no longer engaged. She explains it in the video.

    • @ayseturkoglu1061
      @ayseturkoglu1061 4 роки тому +9

      @@360shadowmoon I got that part, I meant like what were the circumstances of the break up, what did he do?

  • @zobiaw4455
    @zobiaw4455 4 роки тому +721

    “My heart is at ease knowing that what was meant for me will never miss me, and that what misses me was never meant for me” - Imam ash-Shafi’i
    I really hope your healing journey continues and your happiness doubles 🙏🏼

  • @ninaschmidt3834
    @ninaschmidt3834 4 роки тому +524

    Seeing her go from talking about her insomnia during the worst of the heartbreak and then burst out laughing bc of a mud puddle was so beautiful to me. She has come so far and has such strength

  • @debeforesara
    @debeforesara 4 роки тому +1739

    This is the kind of content that resonates with people; raw, real and less curated. Carry on. 💕💕

    • @CarlyGAndo
      @CarlyGAndo 4 роки тому +11

      Yep she’s brave and amazing. Goodluck for your future. You’ll met the right man one day. X

    • @isabell_diejetztsessions9271
      @isabell_diejetztsessions9271 4 роки тому

      Yesss i feel the same ❤️👌

    • @hannahb9864
      @hannahb9864 4 роки тому

      I agree

    • @bellaluna321
      @bellaluna321 4 роки тому +6

      Totally agree. I really felt truth and connection in this video which is so rare these days from influencers.

  • @myllspicks
    @myllspicks 4 роки тому +346

    my boyfriend died in a motorcycle accident around 2 weeks ago..
    praying for healing for all of us in pain..

  • @EllieBean95
    @EllieBean95 4 роки тому +458

    I love the Mary Shelley quote "there is nothing so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change" I feel like its kind of relevant to you rn ❤️

  • @ag9284
    @ag9284 4 роки тому +202

    I cannot begin to imagine how traumatic it was to go from trying on wedding dresses with your family watching to such a major breakup within a couple of days. You are so strong and the way you have addressed the situation publicly has been done with nothing but class, respect and sensitivity. Super inspirational for so many people. Keep prioritising you 🥰

  • @kaykaymumof386
    @kaykaymumof386 4 роки тому +376

    I’m still in shock that he would would break your heart like that. You packed up ur whole life and moved to India for him. This proves that ur an incredible strong person to be a strong as you are. I just hope he had 100% realised there’s never going to be another you. His loss xx

    • @gardenroom65
      @gardenroom65 4 роки тому +13

      Exactly, his loss 🎄

    • @mayalakhenpaul
      @mayalakhenpaul 3 роки тому +3

      Gosh his loss!!!!! Your amazing and this has helped me a lot

  • @aigneisEve
    @aigneisEve 4 роки тому +96

    You're at this point where you're telling yourself it wasn't meant to be and that's why it ended ... I'm coming from the future and telling you one day you'll figure out exactly Why it wasn't meant to be. Not only will you be completely over it, but you will be SOOO incredibly thankful it ended, and if you were taken back in time you would have ended it yourself, maybe sooner, with a big smile on your face and a lot of peace in your heart 💞 It will pass

  • @bhumiworld5080
    @bhumiworld5080 4 роки тому +105

    Dont be apologetic about being philosophical or spiritual, it is part of the process of healing

  • @natalielee6583
    @natalielee6583 4 роки тому +266

    Niomi, you will never understand how much I needed to hear this from you during this time. I've been experiencing THE heartbreak of my life, but your vulnerability and honesty in this video have just been so unbelievably encouraging and refreshing. To know that you are okay and that I too will be okay puts me at ease. THANK YOU for being brave and sharing your very personal journey. It truly means so much. I also feel so much more connected to you, oddly enough, and I love that you've helped so many others out there as well. You have such a gift for bringing peace to people. Never lose that bright light inside of you ❤️

    • @CarolinedeLeeuw
      @CarolinedeLeeuw 4 роки тому +2

      Natalie Lee I hope you will be doing better very soon! You are not alone in this 🥰

    • @natalielee6583
      @natalielee6583 4 роки тому +1

      @@CarolinedeLeeuw thank you so much!! appreciate the support🥺😊

    • @liciramadan7795
      @liciramadan7795 4 роки тому +2

      I hope you’re feeling better and you will come out the other side of this ❤️ stay strong and one day this will all be a memory

  • @hann_0497
    @hann_0497 4 роки тому +127

    As heartbreaking the situation is, imagine if you’d got married and then this happened, always got to look at the positives x

  • @anditspaganpoetry
    @anditspaganpoetry 4 роки тому +292

    I went through a breakup at the same time as you. Really nice to see someone on here being open and vulnerable about such a relatable experience.

    • @francesandrews5506
      @francesandrews5506 4 роки тому +8

      Sending lots hugs x remember you are truly an amazing person 😍

    • @chanelmaccoll7542
      @chanelmaccoll7542 4 роки тому

      me too, same time! how are you doing now? X

  • @thenerdyberty
    @thenerdyberty 4 роки тому +181

    “These moments will make you who you are, but they won’t define you.” Truly beautiful, Niomi. Thank you for this video :)

  • @marpaps25
    @marpaps25 4 роки тому +92

    That physical pain...yes I remember that pain. I thought that my heart could be hurt, but my God, the heart pain I actually felt it was ....hard core pain I never felt in my life.
    But here I am, with all that cracks in my heart, light manage to get through and someone came to my life and I knew....all I suffered, it was ALL worth it. Ten years after, 2 kids and a right person that I love, yes, totally worth it.

  • @ruthrice814
    @ruthrice814 4 роки тому +38

    Loosing someone as you have is like a death. The pain the shock the numbness and the attachment of an invisible string of love is unbearable. Time really is the greatest healer indeed the beat is yet to cone

  • @hfs212000
    @hfs212000 4 роки тому +391

    you are healing quite gracefully niomi. as someone who went through the same thing all i can say is to keep going. cheers

    • @amei8764
      @amei8764 4 роки тому +6

      @@pinkrainbow1 well it’s from her point of view and the point of the whole video was how she went through the dark time also we actually do not know the whole background story of why they breaking up so as for me I wouldn’t harshly say she’s blaming him entirely as they must’ve their parts of why it ended.

    • @notesfrommybookshelf
      @notesfrommybookshelf 4 роки тому

      @@pinkrainbow1 and what?

    • @iqraayasmin3939
      @iqraayasmin3939 4 роки тому +1

      @@pinkrainbow1 clearly the engagement ended because of something he did so I don't think it really matters how he feels..

    • @saram.8671
      @saram.8671 4 роки тому +20

      @@pinkrainbow1 well, if a guy dumps you the day before the wedding than she has the right to blame him. Why would you remain silent? I think she handled it very well, without telling too much.

    • @Bella13710
      @Bella13710 4 роки тому +5

      @@pinkrainbow1 you must be Joe's mate. Literally spewing hate all over niomi's channel. Do one.

  • @oliviaramirez6446
    @oliviaramirez6446 3 роки тому +15

    Six days after this video came out, I left my relationship of almost 7 years. I went from planning my wedding one day (he asked if I wanted to get married in the spring on Halloween, only to rescind it the next day because he said I needed to lose weight) to realizing I deserved so much better. The day this came out, I went out and got a journal on grief. It took 6 days until I was able to break up with my ex (he was away for work) but I resonated so much with what you were saying that I knew it was time. I started reaching out to family and friends. I started making plans. This was the first deep breath before I jumped into the deep end. I came back to this video almost a year on because I wanted to remember where I was when this video came out. If you think you want to leave, that's enough to leave. You all deserve so much love in your life.

  • @christineong2959
    @christineong2959 4 роки тому +280

    I completely buckled when you mentioned your stepdad and mum 💔
    Thank you Niomi for being so vulnerable ❤️

    • @frosting6439
      @frosting6439 4 роки тому +4

      I know me too 🥺🥺

    • @andrem9813
      @andrem9813 4 роки тому +1

      Me too 😢

    • @lisas2802
      @lisas2802 4 роки тому +1

      Yep xx

    • @smjonesy1
      @smjonesy1 4 роки тому +4

      Yes I was crying too - it’s funny, when you cut a tree back it grows back even more complex and stronger than before. Maybe we are the same..

    • @armellerewolf7488
      @armellerewolf7488 4 роки тому

      Same here, resonates so much with what I'm living currently

  • @cariannpoettcker6951
    @cariannpoettcker6951 4 роки тому +115

    “Inhale love, exhale surrender” you too are worthy and you too are loved niomi.

  • @suscharlie2186
    @suscharlie2186 4 роки тому +406

    That was really powerful. Your maturity and soulfulness are so admirable. I’m glad you’re truly and fully living for yourself.

    • @martamanunta6770
      @martamanunta6770 4 роки тому +16

      @@pinkrainbow1 even if she did it, do you blame her? We are human and she is human as well. Stop speculating about her. You are writing crap about her in every comment

    • @Ruthiieekins
      @Ruthiieekins 4 роки тому +6

      @@pinkrainbow1 I’d of broke more than a mirror

  • @xMichelex
    @xMichelex 4 роки тому +239

    "When God is showing you that somebody is not for you & you continue to pursue them. He will make them hurt you until you have no choice but to leave." Author Unknown. I read this today and thought this might bring you and others some peace. Niomi, he didn't deserve such a beautiful soul as you... your King is yet to come, and when he does, you will see how glad you are that this came to pass. xxxxx

    • @TheFlowerchild11
      @TheFlowerchild11 4 роки тому

      Finding that out.

    • @Mimi-rd8on
      @Mimi-rd8on 4 роки тому +4

      God is good

    • @danieller9778
      @danieller9778 4 роки тому

      Wow where did you saw that quote? ☺️

    • @xMichelex
      @xMichelex 4 роки тому +1

      @@danieller9778 it was on my friend's facebook.

    • @angnonymousj7721
      @angnonymousj7721 4 роки тому

      This happened to me a year ago. I could not leave him and loved him so much but he ultimately made the decision for me

  • @frosting6439
    @frosting6439 4 роки тому +390

    Thank you for opening up and being vulnerable. Most can relate to this kind of pain. Thank you for showing there is a light at the end of the tunnel and people can heal. This was so genuine and heartfelt

  • @Aisha-p8f7m
    @Aisha-p8f7m 4 роки тому +19

    Thank you so much for this. 🥺 I too was engaged to be married. I'm 30. We hadn't planned the wedding yet but my fiancé went abroad to work where his parents lived and then couldn't come back to the UK due to Covid. We were planning on buying a house together and we were saving up and everything. But then his parents got ill and his father had to have quite a serious operation and because he was the only son his mum said they needed him there as Covid had impacted their finances. His parents also said it wouldn't be wise for him to settle in the UK as they both needed care and wouldn't be able to care for themselves.
    So he broke up with me and he literally told me via text the day after our anniversary which was mid November and my world crashed. He hasn't been in touch since then and I don't expect him to but it just hurts so much and I just feel absolutely broken. 😔
    Haven't been able to eat, sleep or get on with any work even though I'm working from home. There really is nothing worse in the world than going through true heartbreak. And just like you, I felt and do still feel physical pain in my body. I'm trying to be good to myself and just accept it for what it is. I too am trying to change my mindset and it's true if that man was truly for me then this wouldn't have happened. It doesn't make it any better and I hated life and hated 2020 but now I'm trying to focus on the good things I have in my life and practise gratitude. But it is slow going.
    If anyone else is in a similar position please don't hesitate to reach out. Having people who truly understand really helps. And like Niomi says if it was truly meant to be for me or us and if this was the right path then it would have happened and part of self love is understanding and accepting it wasn't meant for me or us. Reflection is really important and trying to understand why it has happened.
    I am trying to be positive and looking to the future is really difficult but it's a slow process and taking each day at a time is seriously important. We will be fine girls. We will absolutely grow stronger and develop but it just means taking it a day at a time. Much love to everyone feeling heartbroken right now. ❤❤❤

  • @bethanygeorge8135
    @bethanygeorge8135 4 роки тому +141

    I've never commented on a video before, but I just wanted to say thank you so much for being so brave and vulnerable with what you've shared. I was engaged, had my dress had booked my venue and it ended so suddenly, I was so shocked and broken in a way I didn't know was possible to be. Moving forward into a unknown future when I thought that one person was my future was terrifying, but I just want to encourage anyone reading this that is experiencing something similar. You will absolutely get through this, you are growing in this time of healing, you are strong, you are loved, you will not have a second rate life moving forward and the best is yet to come for you.

    • @alexaofelia2750
      @alexaofelia2750 4 роки тому +5

      sending you love and good vibes for the amazing future that is undoubtedly ahead of you

    • @xMichelex
      @xMichelex 4 роки тому +4

      "When God is showing you that somebody is not for you & you continue to pursue them. He will make them hurt you until you have no choice but to leave." Author Unknown. I read this today, and thought it might bring you and others some peace.

    • @liciramadan7795
      @liciramadan7795 4 роки тому

      Wonderful post - very true ❤️

  • @paulaacuna8030
    @paulaacuna8030 3 роки тому +2

    He didn’t deserve you. That’s something I learnt from a (horrible) brake up... Your destiny wasn’t him. You deserve a better person. Thank you for sharing your experience.

  • @juliabeder3657
    @juliabeder3657 4 роки тому +30

    You talking about collapsing in your parents’ arms made me cry a little 🥺 Well done for really taking care of your physical and mental health right after the traumatic event happened. You’re showing a very good example! Also, you were gorgeous in this video 🤍

  • @parisjackson9310
    @parisjackson9310 3 роки тому +1

    We've all been there sweetheart. You dodged a bullet. He wasn't the one. It's empowering to not just survive, but come out stronger.

  • @evealexandra4367
    @evealexandra4367 4 роки тому +95

    I went through a break up at the end of October and it totally broke and is still breaking me. I completely relate to what you said about physical pain. For two weeks my chest actually hurt, it ached and I experienced permanent tightness in my chest. I couldn’t sleep or eat for about a week. I cannot even explain the level of hurt that I felt and it seemed like no one understood. I couldn’t bear to write my feelings or speak out loud about what was happening because it made it feel real. I couldn’t face the fact that the breakup was actually happening because it was so painful. I went from planning on getting engaged, living in Dubai with my partner to throwing out all my belongings and moving back to the UK, all within two days. My life was turned upside down. After two weeks I started to accept things and process it. One month on, I still struggle to sleep, when I do sleep I wake up dreaming of the breakup and it’s traumatic. Seeing videos like this, where someone was able to get over heartbreak is the only thing that gives me hope that this will get better. I can’t thank you enough because this gives me comfort and the perspective to know that it will not last forever. Thank you❤️

  • @thetravelhaeck
    @thetravelhaeck 4 роки тому +57

    I don’t think there is a worse feeling than feeling like the rug was pulled from under you.. I admire your courage and positivity! May we all find the strength to trust again. xo

  • @livlivhamilton227
    @livlivhamilton227 4 роки тому +203

    Your sense of perspective after such a short period of time is really inspiring!

  • @chloemckiernan8655
    @chloemckiernan8655 4 роки тому +76

    Wow, how truthful and raw. You’re a special person.
    Very refreshing to see such realness on UA-cam.

    • @msmiami212
      @msmiami212 4 роки тому +1

      So refreshing! We’re not owed anything, but undoubtedly get invested... this is a rare piece of closure for us too.

  • @IWnaturally
    @IWnaturally 4 роки тому +73

    Thank you for uploading this. My dad walked out on his family and 30 year marriage 3 days ago with no apology or explanation. He told us he was leaving and he'd gone within 15 minutes, and we've not heard anything from him since. I have so many emotions, feelings and questions so your advice will really help. Thank you x

    • @RikoScouse
      @RikoScouse 4 роки тому +10

      I am so sorry for what happened to you and your family! I hope that you take care of yourself and give yourself time to heal. And always remember: your feelings, good or bad, are valid!

    • @wagamama8
      @wagamama8 4 роки тому +5

      Wow that is so awful! Sending you all the positive vibes to get through this 🙏 ❤

    • @macarenagamio7342
      @macarenagamio7342 4 роки тому +6

      Hi izzy! Sending you all the love! And Wanted to let you know that you’re not alone ❤️ I am going to the same thing :( my dad left 2 months ago

    • @annaclared_
      @annaclared_ 4 роки тому +5

      Hey this happened to me a few years ago so I know exactly how you feel right now, here if you want to chat x

    • @lizzyliz258
      @lizzyliz258 4 роки тому +3

      So sorry to hear❤️🙏🏾virtual hugs and prayers

  • @emilymorgan817
    @emilymorgan817 4 роки тому +9

    I found out my boyfriend cheated on me, we had been together 11 years since I was 14. I couldn’t believe it. For me the sleep was the worst part, my mind would go into other drive and I’d wake up in panics heaving like I was going to be sick. Heartbreak really does have a physical reaction and it makes you really ill. But I got through it and I’m happy that you’re getting through it too. I’d say it took me about a year to actually feel like myself again but it’s a real learning experience. You learn so much about yourself and come out of it as cliche and it sounds feeling stronger than ever and so so proud of your self. I hope you feel proud of yourself because you are amazing 💕💕💕

  • @roukayanujj6970
    @roukayanujj6970 4 роки тому +170

    Dear Niomi,
    Everything happens for a reason. Like you said if he were your person, this wouldn’t be happening. It will take time but you’ll get there.
    Lots of love

    • @mkbk9168
      @mkbk9168 4 роки тому +1

      Well said,yes you will get there

  • @ochre5
    @ochre5 4 роки тому +41

    No healing can start without self realization. Otherwise we are stuck in a cycle of making the same mistakes over and over again.

  • @casey4661
    @casey4661 4 роки тому +33

    I lost my mom in January, and while I'm still going through the emotions, writing has helped me immensely.

    • @rubym3808
      @rubym3808 4 роки тому +5

      I am sorry for your loss x

    • @casey4661
      @casey4661 4 роки тому

      @@rubym3808 thank you

    • @Justkeepsmiling100
      @Justkeepsmiling100 4 роки тому +1

      I’m really sorry to hear that. Sending well wishes and butterflies to you 🦋

    • @casey4661
      @casey4661 4 роки тому

      @@Justkeepsmiling100 Thank you

    • @user-rb4lv4if9q
      @user-rb4lv4if9q 4 роки тому +1

      So sorry for your loss💛

  • @LalaAnn100
    @LalaAnn100 3 роки тому +7

    I'm in a similar situation now, about three month on from a shock break up, bought a weighted blanket and it helped me sleep as it calmed my anxiety that the shock brought up! deffo recommend

  • @ibc9044
    @ibc9044 4 роки тому +62

    Probably the most selfLESS video you can make, thank you a million stars. Keep going and well done for getting here Xx

  • @fiona1170
    @fiona1170 4 роки тому +60

    Niomi, I'm getting so emotional because right as you posted this, my relationship of almost three years ended. Literally the same day, and I know you obviously would have absolutely no idea (lol) but I just want to say from the bottom of my heart thank you so much. Thank you so much for being so honest, insightful, and helpful. You made this video at a point in my life when I truly need it and even if you don't see this comment I just want to say for myself and others, thank you so much for sharing things like this with us. It makes us, me especially, feel so much less alone and also gives us guidance when we feel lost. I am so happy that you're in such a happier place now :)

  • @1980sbk
    @1980sbk 4 роки тому +95

    As a Muslim we believe that whatever is meant for you will never miss you and whatever isn’t for you will never find you no matter what. And if god takes anything away from you than he will replace it with something 10 times better than what you’ve lost tht wasn’t good for you in the first place ❤️

    • @lupsy54
      @lupsy54 4 роки тому +1

      🙏🏼

    • @fizzybizzy3790
      @fizzybizzy3790 4 роки тому +9

      "If something is meant for you, it will be yours even if it is between two mountains. If something is not meant for you, it will not be yours, even if it is between your two lips."

    • @madalenasimoes9428
      @madalenasimoes9428 4 роки тому +4

      1980sbk how beautiful ❤️

    • @fizzybizzy3790
      @fizzybizzy3790 4 роки тому +10

      @Sophie Hart This is such an ignorant comment. Firstly, arranged marriages are a cultural practice, and not religious. Secondly, arranged marriages are not forced marriages. They literally refer to a situation where someone suggests that someone might be a good match for you and then you go and find out if they are. People set people up all the time.

    • @jessicalemke4571
      @jessicalemke4571 4 роки тому +2

      @Sophie Hart there are NO arranged marriages only forced marriages and those are happening in every single religion. You’re incredibly ignorant. We call that a nazi over here btw

  • @BB-vq8my
    @BB-vq8my 3 роки тому +5

    2 years later and I'm still healing from my own devastating surprise divorce. I love this video ❤ You are helping so many people!

  • @deepat5088
    @deepat5088 4 роки тому +120

    It was so brave of you to actually make this video, Niomi. Sending you lots of love and happiness... This too shall pass 🙏

  • @jaderedrup5075
    @jaderedrup5075 2 роки тому +1

    I watched this video a year ago, and I couldn’t be arsed with it…I was at a happy point in my life and I didn’t resonate with this. But now I am going through a tough break up, and my mind thought straight back to this video and I cannot tell you how much this is helping me rn, thank you so much for being so raw 💖💖

  • @tas64
    @tas64 4 роки тому +500

    I think it's pretty clear she's not going to say why the relationship ended and we should stop asking her. It's none of our business and its rude.

    • @TheStephShorty
      @TheStephShorty 4 роки тому +29

      Exactly!! I’ve Seen so many people asking what happened. It doesn’t matter and isn’t our business!!

    • @MsKTMvalley
      @MsKTMvalley 4 роки тому +38

      She also mentioned she thought she would never discuss the breakup but she has because she thinks it could help other people. It’s not black and white...! I do agree that asking too many times is rude tho yes

    • @curly23lash77
      @curly23lash77 4 роки тому +2

      What was the video that she announced the breakup pls? I’m new here

    • @constancewright1404
      @constancewright1404 4 роки тому +3

      I agree! Just because she’s online with a public channel doesn’t mean anyone who views her is owed more information. Every one of those people should have some dignity and allow her privacy. I’m personally glad so many people like you are staunchly protective of her and voicing this.

    • @cuca_
      @cuca_ 4 роки тому +4

      But I’m soooo interested to know, it’s natural for the brain to want to piece together why on Earth things that seem solid end

  • @viczamazing
    @viczamazing 4 роки тому +60

    This video is not selfish at all and really makes me feel less alone. Sending you so much love and strength ❤

  • @Happygirldiary2222
    @Happygirldiary2222 4 роки тому +215

    Naomi.. I’ve been following you for years, always find you very likeable and elegant. This video make me respect you too, how you handled everything and still expressing your experience and feelings ...so inspiring. you have all my best wishes and prayers.

  • @celiabenbrahim5159
    @celiabenbrahim5159 4 роки тому +15

    my boyfriend broke up with me 5 days ago and i didn’t see it coming at all. This video truly came at the right time thank you so much for opening up💗 it truly helped me

    • @BeautyObsession87
      @BeautyObsession87 4 роки тому

      I know the feeling, the same happened to me. we'll get through it! it gets easier every day

  • @RachyNoodleNest
    @RachyNoodleNest 4 роки тому +85

    I was with my ex for 7 years. I was utterly in love with him. For the past 2 years he neglected me and withdrew from me. He left me and I had to sell our house on my own and he didn't want to see our dog either. He came to collect his belongings whilst I was at work, leaving all the rubbish behind for me to clear. He was on dating websites within 3 weeks. Trauma is an understatement. It's been exactly a year since he left and I'm doing better now. For the past year, the pain can only be described as heart cracking. Remember rejection is redirection. I wish you well...you are not alone x

    • @hihellojuli
      @hihellojuli 3 роки тому

      Really hope you’re doing well. If it helps, it would have been a longer waste of your time if he hadn’t left. So in perspective, it’s was a victory. Stay strong ❤️

  • @kristinaslovikova8729
    @kristinaslovikova8729 4 роки тому +210

    Almost one year after my break up and everything is healing me but one thing, I get stuck on and I can't help myself is seeing that person change or showing their true colours. It's still unbelievable to me during harder days. Definitely lived in a "fairytale" myself. I know that feeling. Everything after can seem like it was all just a lie a that person was just pretending. But we change, grow and some people choose their own path. It's taken me a long long time to accept that the journey I've imagined for him and I, just was not in the cards. Some days, I am still quite shocked how raw it still is. But I've accepted that it comes along with loving someone, truly.
    Take care of yourself, Niomi. There is a bright future ahead of you! Thank you so much for this :) xxx

    • @xMichelex
      @xMichelex 4 роки тому +8

      "When God is showing you that somebody is not for you & you continue to pursue them. He will make them hurt you until you have no choice but to leave." Author Unknown. I read this today and thought this might bring you and others some peace.

    • @raginisharma9302
      @raginisharma9302 4 роки тому +6

      hello Kristina, This is exactly what I felt. It took me 1 year for my heart to accept that the person has changed from how it was before. And that is the most challenging part . No rationality works immediately. So tough yet thankfully my heart has got aligned with my mind so am making progress. Thank you so much for sharing ❤️

  • @annabreginski
    @annabreginski 2 роки тому +4

    I am just coming back to this video every single time something in my romantic life does not work out they way I hoped it would. Every time, it lifts me up. And it’s so incredibly true what you’re saying. Even though it doesn’t make it less painful I must say. Thank you Niomi, for being so honest and vulnerable, it means so much ❤️

  • @michellelu5745
    @michellelu5745 4 роки тому +102

    Doesn't feel selfish at all. There is such fruit in what you've shared. So grateful you've put such vulnerable, personal thoughts. Healing is everything, nothing is selfish about what you've shared.

  • @sharrlizz
    @sharrlizz 4 роки тому +17

    This felt just like taking a walk with a friend ❤️

  • @Fiiifiiiii786
    @Fiiifiiiii786 4 роки тому +79

    This is probably one of the most honest videos you have ever made. I really respect you for posting this ✊

  • @SeventiesGirl1961
    @SeventiesGirl1961 4 роки тому +4

    As an older person, I can say that it can and probably will happen to you multiple times in your life. How you respond is key. I've always thought to myself, "I've got two choices. Sit in a corner and rock or get up and get on with life." I choose the latter. Well done, Niomi setting a good example for others.

  • @dianacardoso2442
    @dianacardoso2442 4 роки тому +130

    Totally understand what you mean by “being pleased that this happened”. Being single and not knowing where you’ll be next year or even in a few months is one of the most exciting feelings you can have as a young woman. You’re doing so great niomi ❤️❤️

  • @catholicpeaces6257
    @catholicpeaces6257 4 роки тому +5

    Beautiful girl , her sweet pup and a walk in the woods....magical piece of life

  • @rachelnoemi8853
    @rachelnoemi8853 4 роки тому +97

    honestly naomi videos like this, they do help so much

  • @Katrein
    @Katrein 4 роки тому +2

    What you spoke about at 14:00 really speaks to me because the situation almost switches from hurt to cleansing. You realize this isn’t something that is meant to hold you back, it’s something that is giving you the chance to rearrange your course and stir to another direction.
    Also, I can appreciate hearing your story of healing, because while it is nothing like mine and I haven’t been through what you’ve been through, some feelings just are the same. The hopeless thoughts that sneak in are the same. And the message you convey is a message of healing that resonates with me. Thank you for that.

  • @LaurenDawnBeauty
    @LaurenDawnBeauty 4 роки тому +55

    Wow. What a video . I never comment on videos .. but ... this is just everything! I was with someone for 7 years and sadly he didn’t love me anymore ... it broke my heart ... I felt like I was dieing and going through grieve . Thank you so much for doing this video for us . Xx

  • @ulrichweber5215
    @ulrichweber5215 Рік тому +2

    Thank you so much for your honesty. Over a year after your breakup I live a trauma of some other kind. But I feel the same

  • @natalie.anna.
    @natalie.anna. 4 роки тому +20

    What’s meant to be yours, will always be yours. 🙏💕

  • @klaugeraldine
    @klaugeraldine 3 роки тому +10

    i can relate to this so hard. my ex-fiance did the same to me. for you to be able to talk about this just after 3/4 months just shows how flipping strong you are. it literally took me one year to get over the pain. I hope youre doing much better now!

  • @sofian6011
    @sofian6011 4 роки тому +29

    I am lost for words. Thank you for this video. Genuinely.

  • @carinajung
    @carinajung 3 роки тому +2

    I remembered watching this video months ago, now that my heart got broken, I looked it up again. Thank you for every single beautiful soothing word of yours. Thank you for your incredible openness. ❤️

  • @emck6875
    @emck6875 4 роки тому +110

    Niomi this is one of the best videos I have ever watched. I am so excited for your next chapter. You are an amazing woman 💕

  • @natashabailie5660
    @natashabailie5660 3 роки тому +1

    I think you are bloody fabulous - I wish we didn't think that 'selfish' was a dirty word. I think you are about to enter a chapter where you celebrate you and your people and your choices xxxx

  • @annaclared_
    @annaclared_ 4 роки тому +27

    I still remember the feeling of heartbreak years later, it really is the most unbareable feeling until you experience it you can’t put it into words. It’s something we will all experience in a life time and that’s how i view it, it’s just something we need to go through to come out the other side

  • @LivLearnsLife
    @LivLearnsLife 4 роки тому +4

    Neither self-care nor reflecting on your experiences with us are selfish. Please don't ever think that.
    We appreciate your openness and honesty. 😊

  • @lauratheexplorer1570
    @lauratheexplorer1570 4 роки тому +44

    you’re such a worthy person, like maaan it’s mind blowing
    you deserve the world

  • @katie_a1075
    @katie_a1075 4 роки тому +2

    I love that even in the peak of trauma and crisis you had that voice telling you if this was truly who you were supposed to be with, the breakup wouldn’t have happened. And even more important, you chose to listen to that even as painful as it was. That is truth strength.

  • @fayhava3908
    @fayhava3908 4 роки тому +8

    When I had a traumatic breakup my sleep was really affected, I’d wake up in a panic feeling I was trapped in my bed. Bizarre experience and very scary. Self healing is cliche but true, letting out the feelings helps in the future. You’re also right - when you’re with someone who will appreciate you for the gorgeous intelligent lady you are, you’ll know why everything happened as it did xx

  • @zahrine1991
    @zahrine1991 4 роки тому +14

    I have recently gone through a break up and I honestly have to say, watching how you've been focusing on yourself has really helped me think about self healing and looking after myself, and it's helped me get over my breakup. You are absolutely right about being on the wrong path. It's time for a new adventure. Thank you so much x

  • @ilovebelts
    @ilovebelts 4 роки тому +49

    This is so difficult but so beautiful to find others who share the same pain and instead of convincing us that everything is OK, it's so empowering to feel uncertain about future and admit the weaknesses so everybody sees it's OK to struggle. we all are human. We all feel and we all hurt. Thank you for sharing.

  • @AlinaMcleod
    @AlinaMcleod 4 роки тому +1

    You are such a beautiful person inside and out. Thank you for sharing so openly. It was really healing ❤️

  • @Naama178
    @Naama178 4 роки тому +80

    I love you. You’re such an inspiration to me ❤️ After my last breakup I went into deep depression for 3 years. I was on anti depressants and benzos, It was terrible. I didn’t know how to cope with life and I felt like my whole world was crushing down without that person. I’m in a new relationship now and I’m so happy, but I am ashamed by the way I have handled that breakup, so seeing you going through a breakup so bravely just gives me so much strength. Thank you for being so vulnerable. ♥️

    • @FiBallard11
      @FiBallard11 4 роки тому +25

      Just wanted to say, you have absolutely NOTHING to be ashamed of. I totally hear you and can relate about feeling shame, but the pain after a breakup is so so real and we all deal with it so differently. Everyone's path is different. The strength you had to get through 3 years of deep depression and now to come out the other end is so amazing. You are inspiring!! xxx

    • @Naama178
      @Naama178 4 роки тому +7

      @@FiBallard11 I am in tears. Thank you so much for this comment. It feels good being on the other side, I never thought the pain would end. Thanks for being so kind. ♥️

    • @effie5238
      @effie5238 4 роки тому +1

      So totally agree...you have nothing to be ashamed of. You handled it as best you could at the time. I'm so glad you made it through and are happy & heathy once again. 💛

    • @user-rb4lv4if9q
      @user-rb4lv4if9q 4 роки тому +1

      5 years for me. Still trying to get back up. Still falling down. But won't stop till I finally get back up. Have no other choice.

    • @FiBallard11
      @FiBallard11 4 роки тому

      @@user-rb4lv4if9q You are so brave. I am sending you so much hope and love xxx

  • @ashlivingitup
    @ashlivingitup 4 роки тому +3

    I broke my engagement early this year, to be married in summer ( had deposits down, had my gown ready) after a huge realization/disappointment. This was the first time I put myself first and really stood up for myself- like you said, went in to healing mode. Writing helped solidify my decision, process my emotions and keep me grounded. Thank you for sharing

  • @jolantabaran2648
    @jolantabaran2648 4 роки тому +19

    Thank you for that, Niomi. Rejection is redirection - please never forget that!

  • @BethanyHewitt
    @BethanyHewitt 4 роки тому +15

    Literally one of the most honest, raw videos I’ve ever watched. Just absolutely can relate and adore her for sharing!

  • @478mpatrick
    @478mpatrick 4 роки тому +4

    I went through a breakup with someone who I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with at the end of August. Watching this video and watching you come out of this and heal has genuinely helped me heal as well, I know that sounds weird but like I really resonate with what you’ve said in this video etc. Been watching your channel since the beginning, and I love how genuine you’ve always been. Thank you so much for sharing your experience and journey with self-healing.

  • @sallywilliams1967
    @sallywilliams1967 4 роки тому +1

    I never really comment, but need to express a huge thank you for your vulnerability and honestly. It's refreshing but also incredibly helpful. Thank you.

  • @meganconley2224
    @meganconley2224 4 роки тому +21

    This had me sobbing. I think we have all been here and it brings us back. This is a beautiful and honest video. May you find strength during this time.

  • @TheJemMarie
    @TheJemMarie 4 роки тому +1

    Vulnerability is a great strength. Being able to show and speak about troubling times takes immense strength and bravery and is greatly appreciated by many. We are never alone, there is always someone who will understand and appreciate someone sharing their troubles and advice. Thank you for letting us be vulnerable too 💕

  • @beccab1991
    @beccab1991 4 роки тому +8

    I went through a break up around the same time. I had to move countries, give up my life and job. It’s been a difficult 4 months but gosh it was for the best. I did not realise how negative and toxic my relationship had become. Reflection is a powerful thing.
    Thank you for being so open and real about everything

  • @BrunaLordelloC
    @BrunaLordelloC 4 роки тому +17

    It’s the first time im leaving a comment despite being a subscriber for years. I felt so touched by this video and I am sorry that you have experience a traumatic breakup but also glad you found your path towards healing. You are blossoming again. Take your time. You are special ❤️

  • @theresa8410
    @theresa8410 4 роки тому +36

    Dankeschön. The sun will shine, with every day, a little longer and brighter. For you. ☀️

  • @katerinapolaskova4852
    @katerinapolaskova4852 3 роки тому +3

    Thank you so much for sharing this. I am almost 3 months after a breakup from a relationship that lasted 8,5 years. 💔I think that shattered dreams can sum it all up pretty well. But everyday gets better and better and you are a true example of that!
    Thanks for sharing your tips I will definitely try some of your advices! ❤️

  • @groundedinlondon
    @groundedinlondon 4 роки тому +44

    Thank you for sharing something so personal that I am certain will help many in similar positions. You have a kind, lovely soul and I wish you nothing but happiness in this next chapter of your life.

  • @c049030
    @c049030 4 роки тому +1

    The part where you talk about needing to be redirected and the universe had to show you that you were on the wrong path is exactly what helped me during a break up I experienced. I had totally lost myself and there were probably little hints to sort myself out but I ignored them, and then I was given a hint so big I couldn’t ignore. My whole world had to change in order for me to see I was on the wrong path. And I agree with you, I’m glad it happened to me, now I know myself better than ever and I feel as strong mentally and emotionally than I ever have. Keeping you in my thoughts! 💕💕

  • @marianagonzalezaguil
    @marianagonzalezaguil 4 роки тому +26

    I went through a traumatic breakup last year, I can totally relate about everything you said in this video, the excruciating pain is real and for some weaks or even months, life can feel so horrible. But but I can say is that with time and a lot of self love, you can get trough anything, but you have to believe in yourself and believe in the process to heal. Thank you so much Naomi for this video, you are a true inspiration to all of us.

  • @anneliese7427
    @anneliese7427 4 роки тому

    These are all such beautiful reflections and ideas for self care, a quote which got me through alot was 'in the middle of winter, I discovered in me, an invincible summer' there is always something stronger within yourself that is stronger than the trauma.

  • @headamoungclouds
    @headamoungclouds 4 роки тому +4

    It took me over a year to feel like myself again after heartbreak. It was the darkest period of my life but i got through it and healed myself. There is nothing that can really break you if you are a strong and kind person. Thanks for sharing your story, Niomi! It's so inspiring and helping so many people

  • @Mirilovesfashion
    @Mirilovesfashion 4 роки тому +10

    This is your strongest video, darling! Much positive energy to you

  • @sherryboyd3480
    @sherryboyd3480 4 роки тому +4

    Such wisdom from such a young person. I too this year went through something similar. Now almost the end of the year, I’ve gained so much more. Healed many family relationships, grieved losses, got healthy, and feel so much better. Through these tough times, we learn so much.
    So proud of you and you ability to share your pain. It has already helped many!

  • @KristinaYouNow
    @KristinaYouNow 4 роки тому +1

    Sleeping tip! My friend tried every trick in the book (creating a routine, going to bed the same time every day, no screen before bed etc) but it wasn't until she cut caffeine from her diet that she managed to fall asleep without hours of waiting.
    Caffeine has a half-life of about 5 hours which means if you have a caffinated drink like black tea/soda/coffee at noon you'll still have loads left in your system the same evening. We react to caffeine differently but it should be worth a shot to anyone struggling!
    Thanks for being open, Niomi. I don't know what happened, but I can only imagine how hard it must be to deal with something that would be hard enough on its own - not to say in the public eye. Thank you for sharing, it's important

  • @Ellaaa2x
    @Ellaaa2x 4 роки тому +8

    I never usually leave comments on videos but this has moved me so much! You seem like such a lovely person and I'm so glad you were able to prioritise yourself xxx

  • @sallyabedal-aal
    @sallyabedal-aal 4 роки тому +6

    i'm actually happy for your recovery, the days will get better, you are such a pure and delicate soul, that was just tough lesson sent your way to toughen up a little from the inside.
    everything happens to prepare you for what's next.