Battling Body Image (28 years of body dysmorphia)
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- Опубліковано 30 тра 2022
- This was uncomfortable to record but I hope this helps anybody who resonates with what I've said about body dysmorphia. Can’t wait to go on this journey of improving my relationship with my body & my body image.
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S/O to everyone who spent their skinny years thinking they were fat.
Fr 😭
This is what's pissing me off the most. I'm growing an obsession with my body knowing good and well I am skinny. Years later when I put on weight I'm going to look at previous pictures crying at how I didn't enjoy my body while it's looking this good lol
Thank you for being vulnerable and pressing on how distorted the mind is with this illness. I’ve been suffering with Body Dysmorphia for 11 years and when I speak up about it people tend to minimise it to ‘everyday body insecurities’ when it goes soo much deeper than that X
Yeah I can relate so much I literally feel like no one understands but also things I have experienced made me this way
Yeah I understand you on the minimisation of it. On one hand you don’t want to make a mountain of it but also you’re right to call a spade a spade and to want others to understand!
not "I carry all these organs in there" can't lie felt that
Highly resonate. My obsession with how I looked was driving me nuts and placed negative pressure on me working out which I actually do love. I decided this year that every workout wil be celebration of what my body can do and not pressure to transform it into something else. It has been a RELIEF! I must say that I still need to remind myself to appreciate how I look in the present because the -ve thoughts do come. ❤️❤️❤️ All the best!!!
I'm excited to hear that you're thinking of having babies soon! You're honestly going to be a great mom. Looking forward to joining you in this journey💚
Aww thank you!! Not sooon sooon though 👀😅😅
This is exactly where I am. Everything resonated. Initially hesitated to click because I assumed this would trigger me because it would be “just love yourself” vibe. Highly appreciate the transparency, self awareness & proactively changing in healthy way. Positive wishes on your journey
I resonated with everything you said! I have the same body type as you and totally understand that, "well i'm by no means "fat" but if someone lifted up my shirt they would see that i'm not "skinny" either", though process. I want to be at peace with my body no matter how it looks.
I'm a man and I relate to every single thing you said... I've been obsessed with my stomach for as long as I can remember, wanting it to be flat and toned and to have abs. I always think about how I'm a "fraud" because people think I'm skinny but I'm "skinny-fat"... I obsessed over food and fitness the same way.. Thank you fot opening up. It means so much ❤
Thank you for being so transparent and I can relate to you story so much
Thank you 😊
Almost crying because I'm 28 going through exactly this now trying to get to my past body that I didn't appreciate then 😔 I feel like a body imposter because I'm slim but with jiggly areas 😳 But I'be been struggling with this since I was 10 yrs old and saw my mother in her 30s struggling to stay 120lbs after 2 kids 🥲
I am on a similar journey right now. I recently learned that I have a bad relationship with food. I eat when I’m feeling, and I feel a lot lol. As much as I want to love and appreciate myself, I also understand that I have my flaws that I would like to work on. I am also learning that my discipline isn’t where it should be and it’s affecting my health as well as my long term goals. So, I’m pursing health and fitness as a means to build discipline while simultaneously trying to get at least halfway physique I want. I have struggled with body image all my life and I’m finally ready to take myself seriously physically and mentally!
Needed this ! as i am also finally taking accountability for my health and literally signed up for the gym yesterday 🥹
Love that!!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
you don’t know how much i need this video. i feel the exact way you describe like to a T
Love this! Thank you for sharing
Needed this ♥️ thank you for being vulnerable with us.
Love this!! ❤️ your content is so wholesome
Thank you so much for sharing this!
Super relatable❤️🔥 Thank you xx
Thank you for sharing your story, I'm going through something similar at the moment and this is really insightful
I love that you are going on a calm journey
This is exactly what I needed to see as we step into summer! I’m excited to see what you discover x
I cannot wait to join you on this journey!! Thank you so much for sharing! ❤️❤️❤️
Thank you so much for doin this video. I have been feeling the same since 2020.
I love this content! People who understand never get tired of this! It’s hard period! This fed my soul. Thank you!
I'm truly excited to see you through this journey. I hope it serves you well.
Thanks for sharing!!!
This is a brilliant video! That I needed to watch especially where i am in life. Excited to see where this journey takes you!
Hey Adella, I’m looking forward to seeing your progress. Thanks for sharing your journey with us. 💕
Thank you for this Adella. Excited to follow along on this journey.
This video is so well made
I really enjoyed this, I feel this 100!
thank you for this video. you’ve put my thoughts and feelings into a video where i’ve struggled to find the words ❤️
Loveeeeeee this!! I searched up "struggling with body image" because I'm posting a video discussing my journey and struggles and came across this. Thank you for being vulnerable and posting this for all women to see ♥
such a good video to post. thankyou for choosing the words so well xx
I am 28 and have suffered body dysmorphia at least 24 years, combined with other issues or even alone it is difficult. There is so much I have not done because of my body dysmorphia. You are strong and beautiful and I wish you love, strength and healing 🤍
Same girl, it has robbed me of so much life
This is so relatable, I just cant! Thank you for sharing your truth. I’ve felt the same way about my abdominal area because I felt like even tho I’m skinny… I have a stomach and I just felt embarrassed. You are absolutely right about foods and how that changes your mood. I love dancing and I should really incorporate that more when I’m feeling bad because it makes me feel good.
Yes girl hope you get better and feel better soon ! You are stunning and a ray of light on youtube¬
This is ME! Thank you so much for sharing this and having the calm type of approach to this journey. It encourages me to take a second and reflect on where I am and how I can better my relationship with myself and reduce the dysmorphia issue I have as well. Look forward to the content that will come from this topic.
Absolutely love this! I’m on a similar journey but you put it into words perfectly. I love that you’re engaging on this journey to find YOUR personal relationship and insights instead of trying to speak for others.
Excited for you and will join in my own way♥️
Love everything about this video and I can literally relate to everything you’re experiencing. I’m excited to see your journey and learn with you!!
Omg I relate to this so hard, I could cry. Right down to you describing your feelings about your body. Thank you for this. I’m 37 and still struggling with body image.
girl this video was perfection! love the way you've summed your relationship with your body and how you're going to deal with this predicament. can't wait to follow the journey. I too deal with severe body dysmorphia and relate to being a "falsa magra" in Portuguese that means someone who is a fake slim person...
Wow, this really resonated. I was hesitant to click when this came up on my subscriptions page for fear of being triggered and getting some kind of ‘you’re beautiful and definitely skinny!!!’ stuff but this really makes me feel less alone in what I’ve gone through and still suffer with at the back of my head now and again. It’s a journey to unlearn those habits and mindsets (genuinely - creating new neural pathways and breaking toxic ones through not keeping them up!) but I think you’ve got the absolute best action plan and I cannot wait to get to watch and see your mental and spiritual progress. Inspiring me to learn more about myself and my body too. Love you and your content so much 🥹🫶
I was wondering where you were going with this video in the beginning. I love the way you tell your stories. Always balanced.
Loved this video, a lot of points really hit home for me. I know you don't want to turn this channel into nutrition based content and dw girl I'll be watching whatever you put out! But my family has a history if endometriosis and my periods are a real struggle, so if on your health knowledge journey you come across anything period related (pain management wise especially) I would really appreciate hearing about it 😊❤
Wow! I relate to this so much Thank you for sharing your story.
i loved this i dont know what else to say just commenting to engange more people need to see this
literallllllyyy spoke to my bf about this few days agooo - real topic - your content is premium
love u adella!
Adella, you always have a way of voicing experiences so well! I’m trying to get out of this head space as well!
Looking forward to the future content on this topic 🎉 your honesty is appreciated 🙏🏾
🥰🥰
I recently found your channel and I'm obsessed.Thank you
This was so relatable looking forward for more of this topic
Omg thank you so much 😊
Thanks for sharing! I only realised last year that I had struggled with body dysmorphia and went on a similar journey. I even learned that my titled uterus made my tummy stick out no matter what I did. So I learned ways to connect with and appreciate my body and I wish you all the luck on this journey.
This is one that caught me by surprise, I have disliked my body for years but always put it down to just the usual insecurities any person has. It was only when friends told me about it that I realised its something I've been going through, so I'm relieved you are speaking about it. You are the best person to talk on these types of topics because you keep it down to earth, objective and non-judgemental. Looking forward to seeing what you share next x
its so crazy that I have seen this video today - I have an appointment with my doctor this morning pertaining to my bdd, which I was diagnosed with recently. I'm feeling very uncomfortable with seeking help about it, but after 4 years of feeling this way and invalidating my concerns, I knew support was needed. I completely got what you have been feeling. the shame and hatred that body dysmorphia brings you is truly something else. thanks for this x
"belly rude boy" 😂😂😂😅 I can't!
Love this reflection. Such great insights. Soooo excited to witness this journey.
This is sooo impactful. I am going through this now as a 28 yo with 10 years of body image issues and I am encouraged to go through the same journey as well.
How timely this is. I guess I’ve been on a similar journey without realizing it. The changes have been hard but def worth it. I think one of my next steps is to get a nutritionist or dietician to help me with my relationship with food. Lovely video and can’t wait to watch/partake in the journey
adella your intuition must be actually mad, you always seem to come out with the most wholesome useful content when i and many others need it most. im fully convinced you’re a mind reader 😭nevertheless this was so so helpful to me i really appreciate your sympathy for everyone suffering with eating issues (especially ab the calories being on menus - that rlly fucked me up!!). it’s nice to know that even when your close friends and family dont notice/understand the struggles you’re going through, somebody out there does. thank u for being that person so consistently:) i love this community you’ve created i really believe you’re making such a positive change for people like me c: thank you thank you thank you!!
Wow, this definitely my obsession. Objectively, I look well and I am fit. However, my stomach makes me so insecure. You brought tears to my eyes with this revelation. I’m looking forward to following you on this journey
Your plan sounds great, I wish I’d done this when I was younger. Now post 50 I am much more focused on what my body can (and can’t do). I would give anything just to feel the elasticity and ease of having a 30 year old body again, whatever that body looked like.
You’re so beautiful inside and out!
Thanks for being so vulnerable. I know that wasn't easy. This video was very helpful for someone like myself. I have been on a self acceptance journey this year and this is a nice reminder that I'm not alone. Wishing you the best on your journey 💗
Thank you so much! Wishing you all the best also 🥰🥰
I’m only 15 but I can relate to every sentence you said about what you was going through (at the beginning)
And I have the same problems 😩
Hope I can get over it and enjoy my fckn life as anyone else should !! 💗
As part of your journey I'd recommend the intuitive eating book, which I also have on my kindle but haven't read yet :) It seems like a nice philosophy/ approach to live by.
I feel like our bodies are very similar but i would never consider myself slim but i think you look very beautiful and also thin. Isn’t it funny how our minds do things like this?
I relate to nearly everything you have said so far.
Having this issue is so life consuming and painful. I appreciate you speaking so openly and honestly about this.
Blessings to you my darling 💜🦋🌻
Awww hugs! I definitely understand where you’re coming from. I’ve worn slimming tanks under my t-shirts, sweaters, and even slimming spanks my entire life. I noticed my first bad thoughts about my body started when i was 10. I stepped on the scale and noticed I was chubby and weighed heavier than my peers. I thought there was a certain weight someone should be at an age. My doctor would also tell me I’m “healthy” slight obese but normal for my age and height. That’s what stuck to me.
I’m now accepting I don’t have the popular curves, but I do have curves and I am accepting my body and relationship with food and fitness. This video was so amazing. Sending love ♥️
I grew up as a competitive dancer and the body dysmorphia is sooooo real. It really fucked me up and took lots of shadow work to undo that conditioning I learned. So resonate with this ❤️
Thank you for your transparency Adella! Have you considered working with a anti-diet body positive dietitian along your journey? I’m a dietitian in the US and I work with clients with have similar stories. You might consider finding one in your area to coach you or even learn from one through courses or groups! From what you described I think the right RD could be very transformative!
Thanks for talking about this. I believe I have dealt with body dysmorphia since I was a teen. I used to hate my body and think I was fat. Now looking back at old pics of me, I was just naturally muscular. But I saw it as fat. I'm more accepting of my body now at 36, but I still struggle with my face. I've accepted my face but still feel like my face looks strange at times (especially the face shape and my eyes). But I appreciate my body and all of its parts, so when I find myself harping on something I don't like, I tell myself and God that I am grateful for that body part. For example, when I start focusing on my under eye bags and eye shape, I stop and think about how grateful I am for the ability to see
I had anorexia at 17 to 20 years old and have struggled with my weight all my life. Thos video really spoke to me. My belly has been my absolute Achilles heel. The effort and mental stability it takes to remain healthy is immense.
Adella how do you always read my mind?! We booked a last minute holiday and I had a breakdown about not being able to ‘prep (drop weight) for it! I feel horrible in my bikini and I’m by no means overweight, I workout and eat healthy too. I lost some weight for my wedding pre lockdown and was the smallest I’ve ever been, I’ve had to get rid of the clothes I wore back then as I can’t fit in to them anymore. I wish I looked the way I did then! I’ll be joining you on this journey because I know it isn’t healthy! I blame the media and growing up with a beautiful slim mum who always thought she was fat. I pray I’ll break this cycle as it isn’t something I want to pass on to my future children 💖xx
Good luck on this journey❤️❤️
Thank you 😊
Thank you for this insight!
I've been trying to explain to people that by me barely being around 100 at 18, 130 at 22, and back to 100 at 24/25.
I was so sad growing up skinny because I didn't have the shape and so when I gained weight finally on BC, I was happy about the shape, but constantly picking at my belly or my face because I never had weight there before. Now the weight has fallen off immediately after stopping BC and I miss the little weight I did have.
It's really a rollercoaster and as a small person, I try not to talk about it because my size is my privilege.
Adella honey just wanted to say you a stunningly beautiful and that I totally relate to this video...thank you for setting so many people free (including me) with such a vulnerable video ❤️
Thank you I appreciate this comment so much xxx
Thank you for addressing this :) I recommend looking up ‘self-objectification’. A great book is ‘more than a body’ by Lindsay and Lexie Kite
My body image issues were off the chain when I did track and field in high school and college because I wasn’t as lean and didn’t have visible abs like my teammates. It was to the point where how I was feeling about my body impacted my performance. A bad performance was due to me feeling heavy as opposed to lack of focus, poor technique, of feeling tired from heavy lifting and conditioning.
It wasn’t until my post athlete life when I took up capoeira and parkour for fun. It completely changed how I view my body. I became so amazed with what my body can do and proud when I nailed a new skill. It made get into studying ways on how I can further test my abilities and learn how to “bulletproof” (ie mobility/range of motion work) my body so it can be properly prepared and strong enough for the harder skills. I’m having an absolute blast learning parkour and capoeira. I feel like a kid at recess. I don’t realize I exercised until the day after bc to me it’s just playing.
It feels like where are somehow going through sort of the same things. I relate to what you are saying. I was very skinny in my childhood and teenage years and would always want to gain weight and be thicker. Now that I’ve gained the weight I wanted for so long I’m not happy, at least not completely. My stomach gets bigger way easier now and I’m afraid of what it’s going to look like if I don’t do something now.
I’m not sure if I have body dysmorphia but from what I’m hearing I don’t see the same body as people see (or maybe they are just being nice) but yet I don’t hate my body, some days I like her some not so much.
Like you I have decided to be a nerd about food and fitness. I like to know how things work and how I can make sure I do things properly. I’m not there yet but excited for the future. So far it’s been extremely challenging because I really lack discipline in a lot of areas and I’m learning that cardio (or HIIT workout) is helping me in that since I really hate it 😑
Anyways I can’t wait to see more content from you on this new journey. Best of luck ❤️
Thank you SO MUCH for this. Literally resonated with everything, and was just having a convo w my boyfriend about how I tend to be fatphobic when it comes to how I talk about my body. I’m “skinny fat” I guess you could say. Slim, but pokey belly and back rolls. I compare myself to other slim girls and say “I need to be THAT kind of slim” and not what I am now. Or I compare myself to my bodies at different ages. Like you. This was so beautifully made and well done. You’re amazing at this UA-cam thing, girl, and articulating yourself. Always rooting for you 👏🏾🥹
Omg so we’re basically the same person because I feel this so much 😭😭
Learning to eat intuitively was probably the best thing I am doing to heal my relationship with food and my body. It’s a process but so worth it. Good luck ✨🙏🏻
♥️♥️♥️
We're the same age with the same problem. I understand you completely.
🥲🤎🤎🤎
Love this. I'm recovering from body dysmorphia. I have good days and bad days. But I am leaps and bounds from where I started. Something that really helped me is talking back to the critic in my head. We are not our thoughts, just the ones who hear them. So when I'd have a nasty thought about myself I'd stop myself and think "No actually I am fine just how I am" or any affirmation that worked. It's separating yourself from the negativity and taking control of your thoughts. Lots of times we forgot we are in the drivers seat and have more control than we think. I believe in you girl! For what it's worth I think you're an absolute babe, belly and all. You also may find it beneficial to fill your feed with bodies that look like yours. Looking at other midsize people makes me actually feel confident in my chubbiness.
This " we are not our thoughts, Just the ones who hear them" is something I didn't know I really needed to hear and now I'm v grateful for it. Thank you.
Imma write that down. 👏🏾
I've had it for awhile now, I literally sometimes scratch my self from frustration of not seeing myself as the person I want to. Is probably all in my head I hope one day I could love myself truly .
This is literally I am going through right now. I’ve been suffering with body dysmorphia ever since I was young. I really hit rock bottom during lockdown when I was on the implant, not being active and going through mentality I ended gaining so much weight I couldn’t even recognise myself. You guys can imagine the impact this had on my body dysmorphia. I was so depressed and ashamed of the way I looked. I decided to take out my implant and hire a personal trainer which was great but I had rebuild my relationship with fitness. Fast forward to now I have lost a significant amount of weight, I have a better relationship with the gym, my diet is great but I am still struggling with my body image, still not satisfied with it. I keep looking back on how I used to look in 2018 when I did not have the implant how skinny I was. Now I have some big breasts which I did not have back 2018 that really play a role in this struggle with my new body image . I am still on that journey of acceptance of my “woman body” trying to appreciate where I am but it’s so hard. I am so glad to know that I am not alone in this journey. I really do hope that we all get to a place of acceptance ❤
I wish I could like this again! I don't have BDD but I can really relate to almost everything you said, especially 1:22
This was one of the first videos I've watched where I didn't feel agitated or conscious or even triggered, and I think because this was a very frank discussion. I resonated with it so much. Bodies are such a complicated thing, especially because they're so specific to us. Good luck on your journey and excited for your future !
I started clean keto to get my period back (pcos) - got it so now i am fertile for once (age 31), and also skin issues gone, sleep got better, no bloated belly, no hair falling and lost 10kg ! But i have to keep keto for life to stay in current weight and health and not to mess things up again.
I loved this. And I love your approach to having a healthier relationship with your body. I will not pretend I understand what it must feel like to have body dismorphia. And Im sorry to hear about how it affects you. But I can relate with my body tending to develop a fupa, having back rolls, putting on weight easily and noticing the slightest change everytime- it goes on meh. It really makes me feel like crap about my own body. But weirdly I started changing my mindset by just accepting what I do have and seeing the positive in it. I can't come kill myself pls. I'm short, tend to put on weight and drop it easily and I'm not a curvy looking black woman with a bum. Insta baddie so to speak. But I do have very strong athletic legs and I can build muscle easier than others. And when I just honestly started appreciating what I did have, I became a huge nerd when it to how our bodies work and on the uses of the foods I eat. E.g I literally love googling the properties of foods and that somehow made me really excited to experiment with different ingredients and motivate me to cook more. (cooking is not my talent) as in our grandparents where onto something ykow about the uses of food. Madness.
I know this might sound long to some folks and its cool. I'm just telling how somehow my relationship with my body changed without me being very deliberate about it when I started appreciating how my own body uniquely functions for me and how the food I eat affects me. E.g. Too much meat makes me feel bloated which leads me to feeling like crap so I reduced my meat intake and swapped it for seafood and i practically live on eggs. 😅Also bread does not like me. 😂 but I lurveee carbs so I learnt how to balance my foods so it digests easier etc. Then it lead to how the food you eat can improve skincare as i have a huge interest in that too. Honestly, I tell you its so interesting. Now I'm "trying" to eat at a healthy time in the day (not after midnight lmao)😭
Sorry for the long txt Iol. I got very excited watching this vid. I was literally saying aloud throughout the whole vid " Yes!! Mrs Adela coming with the sense I Luv It.
Again I have no idea what its like to have body dismorphia and im sorry that this is what a lot of ppl deal with. However, I wish you the best on your journey.🤌🏾🙌🏾
I read this from the beginning to the end! thank you for sharing.
Love this video
I relate 💯
The obsession with the hourglass figure (including the flat stomach) comes from social media.. in some ways the pressure for women to have what society deems as the perfect body type has always been there, but imo social media has made it worse. It’s hard to accept your own body type when you’re constantly inundated with images of “perfection” in the media.
Thanks for sharing Adella! 🙏🏾#bodyacceptance
body dysmorphia is very real, I had no idea you suffered from this also. I also spent YEARS hating my belly, but now in my late 30s, I've made my peace with my body and yknow what? my belly actually went down a bit! Although that's bc of hormonal changes (Thanks early onset perimenopause!😂😭)
Ahh I love that you’re in a better place!! Haha those hormones yeah 😅😅
Relate 🙏🏻
I want to go on this journey as well!
I feel like I suffer from this too but I don’t want to self-diagnose. Because it’s more than anxiety and insecurities for me, like I think about my appearance constantly and compare. I honestly don’t think anyone understands but this video is helpful.
I spend hours looking at myself in the mirror and picking at my face. Constantly looking at my stomach, checking to see if I have abs. Looking at gig Hadid and then looking at myself, comparing myself. Omg, I wish I looked like Gigi and Bella Hadid. I wanna be a supermodel on the runway. I wanna be tall like Gigi. I wanna make my hair look shiny and flawless with zero frizz. I take 100s of photos of my face and then look at all the selfies and start to think I do look good in a way, but not good enough. My mind think I should look like a supermodel or something, really I feel like I my thought might be too normal.
I’m the same I hate labelling things and therefore making it a ‘thing’
a real one!
I can really relate to this on so many levels. I am also what is considered skinny-fat, I appear slim on the outside, but look deeper, and you'll see some jiggles. I am also, somewhat, insecure about my stomach and I am very insure about my hips/ butt, I wish they were wider/bigger. I often feel like I look too child-like for my age and not womanly enough compared to the other women I see around me. But it's interesting how differently I perceive my body when I'm in different countries. I spent years living in different parts of Asia and I hardly ever, like ever felt insecure about my body. In fact I can say I felt really confident in my body...why?...because my body type somewhat resembles most women out there. I didn't feel out of place, or too child-like... I just felt like I fit right in. But when I come back to London, in the west, all my insecurities just comes flooding back- feeling unwomanly because everyone has wide hips and and a nice butt. This just goes to show that our insecurities could steam from what we are exposed to and what is 'normal' or ''average' in the place we live in.
I love watching your videos!!!
Amazing video as a very thin person it’s always felt ashamed x
🤎
Thx you for this
Wow, you are me and I am you 🤣.
I'm also in bondage with being a size 8 as if a size 10 is remotely big.
Really needed this video.
😂😂 it’s tough