Once a year 5-DAY SALE on NOW! Get 50% OFF select courses. 1. NEW course, the Energy Alchemist, out now! 50% OFF at $99.99 (regular price $199.99) 2. Unwavering Focus course at $79.99 (regular price $99.99) 3. Get the 3 Course Bundle (Unwavering Focus, Intro to Meditation & The Energy Alchemist) for 50% OFF at $249.99. Regular total price is $499.99. Use code "Grow21" at checkout. Go to www.dandapani.org Sale ends on 4th Jan 2021. We do a sale only once a year.
I've cut out all toxic, manipulative, complaining people and those who only used me. Now, it's 3 years I'm alone. All alone. I'm not happy, but at least, I have peace.
You can still be happy being by yourself. Real happiness is within, external factors so contribute a little but your inner peace is you'rs alone. Namaste 🙏
Happiness comes from within you have to be happy and love yourself before you can truly love someone else. I need my me time don't get much with a family so I wake up early
@@beautifulnature.2899 keep reading and educating yourself. With time these people won't have the same effect on you. When you prove them you can live without them, they will rethink the relationship. But the most important thing : you establish how often you see them . You make the rules. All the strength will come after confronting loneliness. Better days will come along. Have faith. Good luck.
Sounds like my mother The temp. Unfortunately because of her health issues it's effected her. She must be still but my sister dumps her children in her home n it's effected her health, yesterday my mum cut her hand with glass by accident.
Yeah, trust your feelings. I now realize there's always been a reason certain people made me feel tired and drained just from being with them. If you can converse and work these things out with people, for mutual benefit, that's good.. If they completely deny their issues and in fact flip everything on you, that's time to leave 'em to figure it out. Maybe one day they will, possibly they never will, but you don't do any good sticking around them. By doing that you're draining yourself and you are also signaling to them that their behavior is okay.
That depends on the conversation, not on the person. This guy gives advice to be egotistical and a bad friend & family member. You don't just walk away if things get hard...what kind of friend is that? Worthless. Be honest and talk to the person to find a better solution for the future. Simply running away is lazy and egotistical.
My brother is one so I know. When a close family member or friend turns out to be an energy vampire, it's a lot of pain but trust me staying in that relationship will kill your life force. The best thing I've realised you can do is pray, genuinely pray if you believe in it. More power to you! 💙
We learn our best lessons from the dark we are supposed to observe and learn from it that we don't wanna be that way. Not absorb it like some people do. Some people observe then absorb and a bad road it takes one down.
I disagree. The dark is beautiful just as the light. I can deal with both negative and positive people. People who are Too positive can be toxic too. Being Too Positive about a situation whereby you are supposed to be concerned can cause harm as well. The key is balance.
My mom, has drained me my whole life. I would love to have a close relationship with her but she refuses to work on her emotional health. So for self care I keep a healthy distance away. Great video.,
My mom was the same way until the day she passed away and her death was very sudden and unexpected and was a very avoidable situation and I sometimes think that if she was more positive and not living in the past and the victim of her life's troubles and instead learned from the events I think she might still be here today so these are some things I wish I would have told her
Guys, study mental disorders (bipolar, covert narcissist...) look up what to do if you are emotionally abused. Plenty of information on how to identify them and protect yourself.
Crazy thing is I can feel people's energy without them saying anything. Some are so overwhelming that its piercing being in the same space as them. I don't let it lower my vibrations though. #StayHigh
Yes. Get physical sensations. Affects me in many ways. Destabilizing. Spend money. Eat wrong. Panic attacks. Fight or flight. Want to move. Very destructive. Need to recover but cumulative effects from injuries.
Guilt...or worse, shame -- that you're _a bad person_ if you don't give your energy over. Finally allowing myself to get firm on this. Not easy, because it doesn't fit in with the self-concept I've maintained for myself, which is to be kind to everyone. That said, I don't want to help people at my own expense. In fact, I am increasingly interested in taking care of myself first and foremost, partly because I like myself a lot more these days than I probably ever have before.
agree about not giving your energy over including that in the workplace. Id rather quit than be around many toxic negative people I see no benefit being surrounded by. petty drama, gossip, etc. complete and total waste of energy
42opendoors being that this comment was written 2 years ago,im sure that by now you are a spiritual warrior and people seeking your help has intensified.Lol namaste
My cousin who is my age...she wore me out with constantly needing my sympathy for her many problems. Never cared about my problems. We are not close anymore.
Me too! Over the summer I had to step back because I realized I didn’t feel good after our phone calls. She was getting mean and pushy. Always needing validation. I feel so much better now that I don’t have to deal with her.
I am sad to say that I have been an energy vampire. I was going through a difficult time. I’m glad to hear Dandapani say that it happens. Forgiving myself as I hope my family and friends will.
Same here... I have a difficult divorce and I try not to talk about it to much to my mum and friends but I listen to their small problems every time and when it is my turn... They block it... Apparently you need to be cheerful again after 2 months... Well, I would like to know a word that describes those people: they are happy, everybody needs to be...
@@andrewtrip8617 The elephant in the room of things like this is they only talk about one side... how THEY feel walking away from the situation. "Oh I felt great after talking to that person!" But what is the other side of this? Did you then feed off their energy? Of course. Energy is an exchange! This whole idea each individual is an infinite potential vessel of abundance from the universe thing is a fallacy. It's a collective abundance that flows and swirls like all other forms of life here. Just look at nature, the answers are all there. At one time we may take, another we may give. A vampire to one, may be a boost to another. There are so many personalities that ebb and flow differently. The lesson here is to find what and who works for you, and you for them.
It goes both way, you just have to be careful not to steal too much from others and you have to be careful how much you let others have and who you let have the energy.
I've been thru ups and downs. I've never been a energy vampire. Never. Especially not to the people I call friends and family. So forgive and don't hang with em no more. I hope your family forgives you and stays away from you because it is a sickness, a disease.
I have no contact with any of my family members for this reason. I don't owe anyone my energy or my life. These things are mine to give and share, but at my discretion.
I just recently realized that WE ARE RESPONSIBLE for our own happiness. Being raised Catholic, I spent decades trying to (love and)- please everyone around me at my own cost. No wonder I felt exhausted most of my life. Thanks a lot for this very helpful video- peace to you and yours.
I totally agree with you!! I ended up resentful trying to help others because I was Catholic. I am not any longer and feel so much better!! No Catholic guilt!!!! Ofcourse I still help people but in a healthy way. I do not allow people to bring me down now...but in case they do I bounce back quickly!
Raised catholic too!!! Am such an anti-Catholic as an adult!!!! Everything about it is just ass backwards to me. I love me some beautiful cathedrals and even symbology but I also love me some JESUS and 1-1 time with him!!
I was raised catholic too, and the catholic guilt is real! Unexplainable. I rebelled from catholic church at 14 and never went back... But the iconography and images and churches fascinate me. I am glad to see other catholic raise people leaning to hindu ideas.. Chanting brings me clarity and focus that church doesn't do
Asian philosophies/religions often put too much emphasis on sacrificing oneself for others to the degree where tolerating abuse/exploitation is exalted as noble / compassionate / selfless, etc. So, this video helps A LOT! Thanks so much!!!
Dan Chung same with blacks especially the black Christian Church. Self sacrifice and suffering is praised and considered noble. I no longer believe this.
Self-sacrifice with awareness of your surroundings is noble, not blindly sacrificing yourself like a fool towards helping every person. Indian philosophy states that you should learn to help others with emotional detachment, because emotions and karma are intertwined, and you can go beyond being emotional only if you have the awareness about life and living, then things stop affecting you because you are no longer in the state of duality of like/dislike, hate/love, etc. If and when you want to help others, do so with no expectations, or don't help at all. This is how it should be. I've known too many westerners who help you with the expectation of being lauded for their generosity. Nope, all that goes for a waste, because the moment the thought of expectation arises in your mind, it is no longer a selfless act and it becomes a karmic action.
My answer to the question: You are right in walking away and distancing yourself from someone who is toxic. The guilt part however could be from codependency on needing another's confirmation, validation or approval of you. You feel guilty, because you feel like you owe another person your time etc. and you are doubting yourself in your decision to walk away. Maybe it's time to take a look at how often your have a tendency to look for the outside world to validate you. Once you no longer need another person to approve of your decisions, your validation is enough...you no longer feel guilty, therefore the toxic person no longer has power over you and your emotions.
Some people make a living by just judging and validating, they make use of the our weaknesses ie wanting approval and feedback for our actions. If we can’t change that we better get such advice from only true well wishes and not those who take advantage..
@@rajagopal5532 Right but sometimes it's difficult to know who is toxic and who is not. I know a lot of toxic, narcissistic, manipulative people who are very charming and "love bomb" in the beginning to reel you into their web. So being able to validate yourself is more important than anyone outside of you toxic or not. If they are not toxic and they are giving you some kind of validation or approval then it's just something extra and nice to hear but your value is not dependent on it and it does not knock you off balance if it is there or not.
Interesting how they also start to 'love bomb' you once they realise you are walking away and are no longer going to be their punchbag. All of a sudden they are 'so worried about you' because they haven't heard from you. Keep walking. Don't let them guilt trip you or doubt your own judgement. You walked away for a reason. Keep walking and walking and walking and enjoy that fresh air and new scenery.
I have never been a person who seeks validation as I was the self lover but by being around energy vampires you truly start to forget to practice self love and remove time and energy for yourself. This happened to me and my mental and physical health suffered a lot because of this. I'm now back to showing myself love and healing.
I’m a INFJ empath so people dump all of their blues on to me🙄🥴I never bring any of my problems to anyone, and I only offer my best! Having an optimistic mindset makes people believe you don’t have any problems, so as soon as they see you or call you here comes the BLUES 🥴 Leave me alone👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
omg i thought i was the only one. i have a friend exactly like that always complaining about something and i just don’t want those kinda vibes in my life
walk away if you can. You owe it to yourself and all the other good people around you. I distanced myself from a 'friend' several weeks ago, since then she's only shown even more how negative she is, made me realise the situation was even worse than I thought. I was distancing myself temporarily to get some space but now I am certain it needs to be permanent.
Sounds like she isn't really your "friend" then, if she is a true friend then try to help her to be more positive and if you are too "annoyed" by her or she doesn't want to change then you should drop the contact.
@Silvia C. I had similar. Liked to phone 3 times a week and prattle on and it got so tedious because everything was always about her. You're right about more and more..
I USED to have many energy vamps in my life and the more i focused on "fixing the situations" the more they grew. Once I decided that Im the only one who controls my energy and made a serious decision to only say what I Honestly believe and mean and say it in a natural calm way. Speak the way I normally talk. No decorating it to "meet their needs" or be at their level. I am supposed to talk the way I talk and since its truthful and natural none of them can find a problem with it no matter how much they try. And i can tell, they are trying so hard to get me to say or do what they want. Since I don't get mad and I MOVE ON after I've clearly stated my truthful belief like an adult, they just give up. Im not going to pretend that they are making sense when they aren't. Im not going to be rude either. Just making sure Im speaking my MIND HONESTLY has changed what used to be dreaded encounters into empowering experiences.
I have also experienced the same situation as that of yours and I think your "move on statement" is very true and I am also going to follow it. Hopefully it works for me as well.
Fantastic that you have made the differentiation between TEMPORARILY or INHERENTLY! SO important to understand - if not understood, people can too easily cast aside those who are genuinely temporarily struggling. I think we need to be careful not to cast aside people too quickly. Sometimes, part of our spiritual growth, is remaining in relationships with those people, but developing boundaries, responsibility for our responses etc, and not blaming the entire interaction on the other.
I'm so glad someone asked this question. Sometimes you feel alone contemplating spending time with people who are close to you that suck the life out of you.
Great information! I have an aunt that I can no longer be around. Every time I was around her, I would feel so tired. Even get headaches sometimes. She would talk and unload her problems on me before I could even say anything. Great video!
HighPriestess Kathie i have a huge problem on that. People drive up n wait at my house n exchanging bodies n stealing my body n mind. how do i stop this and they are able to basically have sex with me n disturbing n harassing me like hell. its like tantric sex. its so awful. and at work your boss is abusing your hands n mind n body too and mske me feel like shit. that all is so since a decade and i dono how i must throw all this rubbish... pls tell me.
This has really hit a cord inside me today...some people actually have to learn to be selfish to protect their own energy ...thank you for sharing this insight and for quoting Tesla!!!
So you've got a parent in your life who has deeply hurt you emotionally. They have mental health issue that they are not able to acknowledge. They are also have severe anxiety and focus mostly on themselves and how they feel. Trying to make you feel guilty for not wanting to spend time with them, when spending time with them can often be constant criticism. But I don't think they realise just how negative and horrible they can be. They only react. Bask in their own emotional needs which seem to be intrusive to your life. What are you supposed to do with someone so self absorbed? Logically I can see that distance would be the best way to preserve yourself. Try to assert your own emotional needs. But being emotionally manipulated by a former caregiver is difficult. You love this person so you don't want to hurt them, but what they expect from you is solely for their own benefit. I got to the point in my relationship with my mother where I believed she was evil. Now I don't think she's evil but a person who has suffered and been hurt themselves. And in some way- her vitriol made sense to her and was misdirected towards myself. I was the emotional punching bag. But I don't think she's capable of making this realisation. So what do I do? Just remind myself of this. Daily if needs be. Remind myself there is nothing wrong with me. And when it's a parent-child relationship that has broken down- it is always the parents fault. Basically, my parents split up when I was 6. I maintained a relationship with my father, a good one and my mother resented me for it. Now as an adult I can see how hurt she felt that her daughter could maintain a relationship with someone who dumped her and broke their promises of marriage, with two young children. I feel like shes just stuck being reactive. Never growing. Never wanting to be anything other than the injured party, never taking responsibility for their own behaviour. Never realising that the pattern of behaviour of confrontation and arguments only breeds more of the same. She's not able to back down from an argument. She can be a pitiful person. I wish she could be happy, but I don't know if she's able to get there. And partly I don't think it's her fault, it's just the way she's made. If anything it makes me feel so sad that she could feel so sad and alone and I can't do anything to help her because although I care about her. I really don't like most of what I've experienced of her. So who suffers more? Her or me? I choose me. I think I have to choose myself. I have to love myself enough to realise I deserve people who adore me. So guilt should be turned into pride that you have managed to take care of yourself and love yourself enough to not let other people treat you badly.
I find this very challenging as a person on the autism spectrum because I find ALL human encounters to be draining and exhausting, so it is very easy for me to get involved with energy vampires and narcissists as I can't really tell them apart from anybody else.
@@TilisuAOL Is there something wrong with me I keep making the same mistake so much I meet more toxic people recently I hang with toxic people from 2012 to 2019? Am I a vampire drainer ? I’m so sorry if I have to behave like this I’m feeling very depressed and need some deep help I don’t know what therapy help me I’m 26 years old now being on Autism spectrum ,ADD and learning disability and asperger . I have trouble socializing with people. People call me weak and people blame me from things I haven’t do and all my friends play the victim too and never gave me a chance to play the victim . Every time I socialize with girls they all ghost me and go for my friends in dating and friendship and is not fair I been trying my best to get a girlfriend or even a friend now I have nobody. I know I have tough time with conversation my conversation skills is too boring and toxic I know I bring up the past over and over again and keep making the same mistake and I repeat myself so much only one friend understand me and try his best to be nice to me. I keep reminding myself this in my head what if this person take advantage of me or what if this girl rejects me cause I been rejected so much or what if this new friend hate me because I have nothing to say just plain boring conversation. Let me know what I have to change for my behaviour I know I’m a nice guy I try to stay away from people having a bad day.
@@andrewliang4112 I know how you feel and I’d like to talk to you about these mutual struggles we share just trying to navigate through the world and society. We’ve spent our entire lives trying to be everyone but our own authentic selves. Find your passion, and you will find yourself, and once that happens YOU will be found and loved for being your true authentic self. We’re all born for a purpose, we’re all here for a reason. We are all born complete; we don’t need a partner or spouse because we’re already whole. We’re all like snowflakes. Different souls having a human experience. We’re not our bodies or our degrees or our faith or nationalities… we need to learn how to love ourselves first. That’s when gratitude overflows and abundance and love follow. Spend as much time as you can alone, that’s how you become self aware. If you’re in a hurry, try meditation. I know it’s hard especially with adhd, but 5 minutes at a time first, then ten minutes… Please keep in touch 🙏🏼 in the meantime, stay safe and blessed SSAB 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🤜🏼you got this!😀
Thanks Mr Dandapani, what brought me here today is that I am going through a terrible experience of being around an energy vampire since past two days. You’re message resonates with me very well, thank you so much. I just want to go on my own way even if I’ll be all alone ❤
We could protect ourselves from energy vampires draining us in many ways and still be in their company: Meditation, mindfulness or simply resisting from falling in, not engaging them.
Does that include rapists, pedophiles, petophiles, murderers, thieves, redundant complainers, lazy people, one who plays stupid so others jump in and take over to get things done? Run people run! Spend that time, having some fun with people who appreciate you. Perpetual Vampires do not deserve your time, love or energy! Soulless ones I say.
The longer you stay in their company, they will drain your energy for sure. These tips you’ve given should be employed if its an absolute must you stay around them. Once you can, get away as far as you can from them. Speaking from experience here
This is not relevant once you know how to maintain your energy, cultivate it. You only have this problem when you match the "energy vampire" frequency. Simply stay high and energized around them and they have no possibility of draining you. That energy is endless. It is bottomless.
Thank you very much for this uplifting remainder. I´m still feeling so drained now, after a very bad situation from yesterday. Slowly but steadily I´m recovering, you helped a lot. God Bless You!
Thank you noticed that every time I would speak to a particular person over the phone I would feel so tired. He spoke a good game , just that the tiredness was telling me something. So needed to hear this thank you so much. Peace n Love to you. And all who saw this video.
Yes, energy transfer through text or communication. Sometimes you can feel energy by just an text message. You can tell if that person is happy or sad.
Wow this is so amazing! I needed to hear the is, I am rebuilding my life with my channel and with the work I do for others. Going launch my own business soon, but people close to me doubt me and drain my energy. When I am around them most times I am feeling down, and it’s like they look for drama.
I completely agree that energy vampires are not likely to change. I think they don’t change because they don’t see themselves as being an energy vampire. Great video! Thank you for posting!
my mother is a professional energy vampire .says i'm liveing in darkness an she some how knows best for me when her life is in shambles no one wants to have any thinge to do with her because of constant high drama.. my brother says she ruined his life..he might be exagerating she greatly reduced the quality of his life but ruined it.?? .he has to search inside himself to better his life whitch is hard he is non expressive can't even hug another person.. l said enoughf is enoughf ..one day with her .made me depressed sad hopless for a whole day an a half..l can't afford the luxury to feel down l need all the energy for myself my husband 3kids my whole clase my friends..l have soo much too give . felt really she was blowing on my candle whitch is my spirit ..soul..trying to dime my lite selfishly so others cannot see me.. .with these of types of people make bounderies an call back our energy to our selves giveing freely when we wan't but having it tooken .stolen just feels plain dirty and your body knows it..hence the violated feeling.
Having grown up with her, you will be habituated to your mother's negative energy. and therefore people like her will be able to pick up on the subconscious cues you give off. Start to train yourself to not be sympathetic to people who drain you of your energy and do it consistently. When they realise you're not giving them your time and energy, they'll give up and seek out new victims.
Temporary energy vampires, Inherited energy vampires, and the entrepreneur/ business analog; gave me a clear cut and to the point understanding. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Thanks
Thank you so much, although I was sure I wasn't alone this video proved to me I'm not alone since I am leaving and trying not to feel guilty. We are never alone and I want the world to leave me feeling uplifted and blessed. Difficult people taught me exactly who and how I don't want to be , and for that I am grateful.
Thank you so much, I really needed to hear this. I struggle to keep myself on an equal balance and so discovering about energy vampires really helps.....but equally its made me aware that I too can be draining when in a low mood, so thank you for your explanation.
I don't feel that anyone has any right to my time and energy just because they are family. Only to my kid I will give the energy she needs from me, but she is already learning to use her energy wisely, and respect others when they need to be alone. It's a blessing to save your energy for yourself, without feeling guilty.
Yes, there r people who r ignorant and act foolishly without giving adequate thought to others' comforts or conveniences. But it is not a big sacrifice to spare some time for them when there is also a possibility of enhancing ones perception. Those who falsely think high of themselves want to "avoid" the other person because such behaviours r considered lofty etc. It is rather better to tell the person on face the truth- like, i feel bored or i am in a little hurry now etc- rather than sneakily avoid the person, communicating a sense of superciliousness. May be very rarely there r people who may be described as energy vampires. But i dont think i ve come across one any time for no reason. Sometimes a situation turns out to be energy sapping, but we ourselves (or some external situation) might have contributed to it, not caring enough to stear the situation to a better end! Perhaps i, simply, am an incorrigiable optimist trying to see the goodness even in the worst of individuals who r a threat to the comforts and conveniences of others!
I noticed the change in energy when I got a week off work. I've only had 1 week off work for this year, and with this Covid thing going, it's worse. I want another job and I feel stuck because I care for these people but its draining. Absolutely draining, my boss doesn't have anyone as back up, doesn't feel safe getting a back up with everything going on, but I'm just so fed up I feel awful that I leave her in a awful position. But it's not my fault. I need to let them go and make my choices because I'm just killing myself. Thank you so much for this💜 I'm glad I stumbled upon you, I keep getting the same msg but I dont do anything about it because of what I might cause. But you are right, I'm not able to uplift others if I'm being drained💯💯
Wow, that’s exactly what happened to me yesterday. I hung out with someone who often times triggers a panic attack or anxiety attack when I spend any length of time with them but yesterday I got really sleepy being around that person. I was so sleepy, I had to go to bed much earlier than I normally do. When will I ever learn to not be around people like that? 🙏🏼
The most reknown type, as long as I'm concerned, is the accusatory type. For example a friend who's blaming you and humiliating you as soon as you don't do exactly what he wants.
They say that no good deed goes unpunished. If you find yourself giving a lot to a person and almost paying the price for having done so, you are absolutely dealing with an energy vampire. Recent realization that I had.
People talk about so-called “energy vampires,” those people or situations or things that seemingly drain off our energy. You hang around them and you leave feeling tired-so they must have “sucked” the energy from you, right? Nope. They don’t exist. That’s just a way to put blame on something external-that thing, out there, over there…that’s the cause. Not me. Not my choices. I say this with love: We can all grow up now and start taking responsibility for our ‘stuff.’ We choose who we hang out with. We choose how we judge them (which is really what results in the energy drain-we’re so busy thinking about how nutso they are or evaluating their choices, we go home later feeling drained…and then blame it on them! They’re just being themselves, you know). In the rush to define who is and isn’t an energy vampire, most people forget how draining it is to resist practicing compassion for others. We choose whether we blame. We choose the to-do list. We choose what we spend money on. We choose where we work. We choose whether our house is organized. We choose whether or not to work out. We choose whether or not to be informed. We choose whether or not to be present. Some of you might be reading this at exactly the right moment…perhaps you’re around a lot of people who you’d say are definitively “energy vampires.” But again, the invitation is there to see if you want to be in charge of your experience, or a slave to theirs. it’s all a choice. For some people, that’s an immensely confrontational statement. Please (please!) remember that I’m saying it with gentleness. Also, I’m saying it to be helpful. Why? Because… When we recognize that we choose, we are free to make different choices. For instance, choices not to hang around people who just aren’t a match for our psyche or soul, even as we recognize that they’re just as tender and fumbling and human as we are. If you stop saying that something external to you is the issue, it won’t mean that you have to put up with the person. It’ll just free you up to make a more empowering (and energizing!) choice. make a list, check it twice. Make a list of the various things in your life that you choose that might not be your best choices because you notice that choosing them means you’re feeling tired, drained, agitated. what would you like to choose? Consider that “letting go” is not always the best answer. Sometimes (usually with relationships) “letting go” is just a form of running away, because we’d rather stop returning phone calls than drop down into our hearts, get present to what we feel, and try to work something out with someone. So before you declare that you’re quitting your job, your boyfriend, or your stillness practice, be willing to investigate the in-between spaces where there might be workable solutions to your concerns. Create stillness in your heart in knowing that you didn’t avoid or run away or tune out-you got present to what you need and then spoke into that.
I cut ties with an old skoo homey. Hav'nt seen him in years, dude grew long hair with 5 new beer guts. After a poker party reunion, we all exchanged social media and now he pesters me twice a day, every day about his bs problems, how my married sis friend zoned him, and trying to make me do waste of time things that would have to involve the entire day. I would always remind him, "yo member I told u?..I'm extremely busy pursuing my life goals and dreams. So I won't be available for anything social this year until maybe a party on new years eve." The dude does not get the point and just devizes new schemes to enter my day, everyday. Then he tries to make me feel guilty by getting mad when I always say "NO...Yo member I told u? I'm bizzy af..." It's like clockwork. Forget about all that drama ppl. Life is to good, and way too short for shenanigans. It felt good blocking him.
I mainly avoid ppl these days, I feel neutral/ content most the time around others and only now & then it's draining or uplifting and feel it strongly. I think I'm able to protect myself without needing crystals etc. I imagine a barrier and mentally say "I don't care what you think of me etc" whatever I need to say mentally when I know what they're really like & wanna protect myself or if it's a client I don't gel with I try my best to counteract what they're giving me .. depending.. on my mood lol :/
I came here after seeing a different video that shared how we should cope with disrespectful people and I didn’t really agree with it, but I liked this video I’m watching now because it’s more simple and self caring. The other video before basically said “we should not attract energy vampires .The cause of attracting energy vampires could be because you’re energy of confidence is unconsciously triggering their hate and jealousy you are causing them to have a competitive view or mindset, you should improve yourself and become a person who would not trigger them or make them feel inferior and jealous ” “ The only thing you should do is improve yourself and change yourself don’t change them because the problem is theirs and your problem is yours“ well it’s true that we should not expect them to change, but it seemed liked too much self analyzing and blaming yourself so I like simple better, just don’t take time on them ,like you said in this video , don’t feel guilty for not spending energy on them.
Right! It's important to distinguish whether it's temporary or inherent to that person. I think it's great to offer some of your energy to someone who is temporarily an energy vampire. That's what social groups are for: lifting each other up. Just be mindful that it doesn't become chronic!
I notice they love to talk on phone and have you in their house cause then they feel more comfortable complaining on and on and repeating the chaos and draining you. I tested an energy vampire and said we need to talk at a restaurant more often and they refused and I knew cause they knew they would look ridiculous doing endless depressing rants and bragging endlessly in front of strangers at a restaurant. 🤣
It's many energy vampires in churches. They especially love the meet and greet time and the hugs. They attach cords to you if not care and they use these cords astrally quantum-ly to draw your energy even from a distance; much like a Succubus 😮. Be careful with your energy Don't be too nice to them. Sometimes in groups you can see them coming, they target the nice and empathic ones.
Yesterday I met this girl and all the times I met her in my life I left very confused and drained. When I found out I had to see her again I immediately became very anxious, I was anxious, shaking, dropping things, tripping and feeling bad during the entire time with her and when I left, like you said, I just reached the other side of the street and started to cry uncontrollably. I felt horrible and slept horribly, I felt like this person brought everything bad in me, I even let out insecurities about myself I haven't talked about in months. She is very intense and has a wild past and lots of bad stories to tell, she always brings everyone around into her thing, even unknown people and everyone seems bothered. I wonder what kind of energy vampire she is. I'm still trying to recover.
I suffered a lot with close ones..blaming people. Blaming gf.Using my talents and goodness for selfish causes. I pushed myself until I drained fully with no drop in my cup. Finally realized no one's loves you. The only person I can rely on love is me. Now I am in exile and incognito. Feeling so blissful with god in my mind.
Have other people noticed that energy vampires usually have very chaotic energy. Just had a energy vampire co-worker but I had to end that situation because I had to spend waaaay too much time with her and she had no insight.
It's become so bad that every single second at work I am bombarded with feelings of aggression...total uncontrolled aggression...and it's not coming from me...I don't want to start drinking again..please help
Totally agree. Leave them behind. Nobody ever changed any body by correcting them unless you feel deep love for them. If you dont have the pure love in you, without expecting anything back... please go away, safeguard your integrity 💞
Once I feel you are draining me of my energy. I pull back or have limited to no contact with you and I do not feel guilty what so ever. I have to protect myself and my energy.
I think I've just found an intelligence vampire, I can feel my IQ doping second by second while watching this. Relationships are a two way street where one has to accept that other people are not perfect, and in turn the other people have to accept that you are not perfect as well. If you are so self important that everyone around you must conform to your own idea of what they should be perhaps you are the one with the problem and not them. Cults love to divide people and tell you it's everyone else that is negative, they are bringing you down; you should cut ties with them and just surround yourself with the "right" people, as long as you have a credit card you are welcome.....
Oh yeah he does say "everyone should conform to your own idea" AND implies it lol thanks for making my I.Q. go up. I think I'll take my new throbbing, intelligent brain and click some more videos that I'm predisposed to hating. Being hateful is a new age thing, which I don't do anyway.
Hi Dandapani, thank you for your video. I have actually a question. You say (and i hought too) that permanently energy vampires should be avoided. But what about the law of the mirror then? If i keep actracting these kind of people, i should ask myself why. In which way this person is reflecting me? Just to avoid them doesn't solve the problem, from my perspective. Isn't it better to observe and investigate our reactions in front of them in order to learn something about ourselves?
I agree with you, I was thinking the exact same thing. Something about our reactions to these people encourages them to keep seeking for us. It is our reactions that makes them cling to us.
i think you may keep attracting these kind of people because you are a giver of energy - and you allow them to take your energy. it's not that they are reflecting you perse - they just want the energy because they don't want to work on themselves to raise their own energy - so they have to get the energy from someone else to feel good. As a result, they go to persons who not only are givers of energy, but also do not have good boundaries, and allow people to take, even those who haven't earned it. Dandapani is telling us that we should not feel guilty about having proper boundaries, and that we should protect ourselves. That's my take on the issue.
To a point..... but people will be abusive towards us if we allow it. If we don’t give them the opportunity then they go and find another victim. I think what he is talking about is boundaries and self love. Not everyone will be nice to us and if we continue to believe that we only attract these kinds of people then maybe change the thought pattern to attracting happy uplifting people instead and see what happens.
Life is too short to permanently investigate unless you wanna write a diary, a book. Just cut them out for the good. Concentrate on yourself and maybe after, things will go better.
Once a year 5-DAY SALE on NOW! Get 50% OFF select courses.
1. NEW course, the Energy Alchemist, out now! 50% OFF at $99.99 (regular price $199.99)
2. Unwavering Focus course at $79.99 (regular price $99.99)
3. Get the 3 Course Bundle (Unwavering Focus, Intro to Meditation & The Energy Alchemist) for 50% OFF at $249.99. Regular total price is $499.99.
Use code "Grow21" at checkout. Go to www.dandapani.org
Sale ends on 4th Jan 2021. We do a sale only once a year.
I've cut out all toxic, manipulative, complaining people and those who only used me. Now, it's 3 years I'm alone. All alone. I'm not happy, but at least, I have peace.
You can still be happy being by yourself. Real happiness is within, external factors so contribute a little but your inner peace is you'rs alone.
Namaste 🙏
Niranjan Rao I disagree, I think we define happiness by our emotions
Happiness comes from within you have to be happy and love yourself before you can truly love someone else. I need my me time don't get much with a family so I wake up early
same, its only familly member that wanna down my positivity and then whine for money, pass lol
@@beautifulnature.2899 keep reading and educating yourself. With time these people won't have the same effect on you. When you prove them you can live without them, they will rethink the relationship.
But the most important thing : you establish how often you see them . You make the rules.
All the strength will come after confronting loneliness.
Better days will come along.
Have faith.
Good luck.
People that always repeate the same conversation over and over again are energy vampires! So draining and annoying!
I met many of them.
yep thx for exposing the obvious, the sarcasm and irony fit my vampirisng
Thank god im not the only one having the same feeling.
seriously...you have nothing but "filler" conversations....
EXACTLY!!!!
Seriously they drain you and then run a guilt trip on you
Sounds like my mother The temp. Unfortunately because of her health issues it's effected her. She must be still but my sister dumps her children in her home n it's effected her health, yesterday my mum cut her hand with glass by accident.
Ohhhh so true
So true!
Narcissist at its finest
Yeah, trust your feelings. I now realize there's always been a reason certain people made me feel tired and drained just from being with them. If you can converse and work these things out with people, for mutual benefit, that's good.. If they completely deny their issues and in fact flip everything on you, that's time to leave 'em to figure it out. Maybe one day they will, possibly they never will, but you don't do any good sticking around them. By doing that you're draining yourself and you are also signaling to them that their behavior is okay.
1. After conversation ask yourself whether you feel uplifted or drained.
Truth
Drained
Drained
Every time 😠
Exhausted
That depends on the conversation, not on the person. This guy gives advice to be egotistical and a bad friend & family member. You don't just walk away if things get hard...what kind of friend is that? Worthless. Be honest and talk to the person to find a better solution for the future. Simply running away is lazy and egotistical.
Yes, this is perfect 👌
Most of the vampires are from family and friends.!! That's the hell part of the story!!
My brother is one so I know. When a close family member or friend turns out to be an energy vampire, it's a lot of pain but trust me staying in that relationship will kill your life force.
The best thing I've realised you can do is pray, genuinely pray if you believe in it.
More power to you! 💙
very well said. stranger have more respect so true
So True! I agree 100%
agree ! word
Pets too..my hamster and goldfish
You must 100% stay away from negative people. Find happy positive people.
One needs to delve into darkness, too, or you'll end up fearing it, which is definitely not the right way
Absolutely true
We learn our best lessons from the dark we are supposed to observe and learn from it that we don't wanna be that way. Not absorb it like some people do. Some people observe then absorb and a bad road it takes one down.
I disagree. The dark is beautiful just as the light. I can deal with both negative and positive people. People who are Too positive can be toxic too. Being Too Positive about a situation whereby you are supposed to be concerned can cause harm as well. The key is balance.
That is 100% percent correct.
My mom, has drained me my whole life. I would love to have a close relationship with her but she refuses to work on her emotional health. So for self care I keep a healthy distance away.
Great video.,
Very good
Omg that’s my situation ... I love her to death but she’s so negative and attracts negative energy.... my breathing changes when I’m around her.
Same here
My mom was the same way until the day she passed away and her death was very sudden and unexpected and was a very avoidable situation and I sometimes think that if she was more positive and not living in the past and the victim of her life's troubles and instead learned from the events I think she might still be here today so these are some things I wish I would have told her
Guys, study mental disorders (bipolar, covert narcissist...) look up what to do if you are emotionally abused. Plenty of information on how to identify them and protect yourself.
Crazy thing is I can feel people's energy without them saying anything. Some are so overwhelming that its piercing being in the same space as them. I don't let it lower my vibrations though.
#StayHigh
I’m the same. Please explain what you do.
That part
Same as me and sometimes its toxic AF
Yes. Get physical sensations. Affects me in many ways. Destabilizing. Spend money. Eat wrong. Panic attacks. Fight or flight. Want to move. Very destructive. Need to recover but cumulative effects from injuries.
People that talk alot about nothing can be energy vampires also
jafro black god , this is so true!
Talk a lot aboit nothing???
Tamanaa Jain ... don’t worry, I noticed week people will be drained- they can’t exchange - so they are left drained
Exactly loud voice
jafro black definately
Guilt...or worse, shame -- that you're _a bad person_ if you don't give your energy over. Finally allowing myself to get firm on this. Not easy, because it doesn't fit in with the self-concept I've maintained for myself, which is to be kind to everyone. That said, I don't want to help people at my own expense. In fact, I am increasingly interested in taking care of myself first and foremost, partly because I like myself a lot more these days than I probably ever have before.
agree about not giving your energy over including that in the workplace. Id rather quit than be around many toxic negative people I see no benefit being surrounded by.
petty drama, gossip, etc. complete and total waste of energy
42opendoors being that this comment was written 2 years ago,im sure that by now you are a spiritual warrior and people seeking your help has intensified.Lol namaste
42opendoors same here ...😐
42opendoors 🙏 Amen to that!!
Wow, you put exactly how I feel into words.
My cousin who is my age...she wore me out with constantly needing my sympathy for her many problems. Never cared about my problems. We are not close anymore.
It's a shame, but take advantage of that freedom. It is not your fault that she doesn't care about anyone else.
Me too! Over the summer I had to step back because I realized I didn’t feel good after our phone calls. She was getting mean and pushy. Always needing validation. I feel so much better now that I don’t have to deal with her.
Tips pls 😂. I srsly need to say NO or I'll be exhausted my whole life.
I am sad to say that I have been an energy vampire. I was going through a difficult time. I’m glad to hear Dandapani say that it happens. Forgiving myself as I hope my family and friends will.
Same here... I have a difficult divorce and I try not to talk about it to much to my mum and friends but I listen to their small problems every time and when it is my turn... They block it... Apparently you need to be cheerful again after 2 months... Well, I would like to know a word that describes those people: they are happy, everybody needs to be...
Don’t beat yourself up we are social beings ,we give and take ,neither is good or bad .this bloke is a selfish crackpot .
@@andrewtrip8617 The elephant in the room of things like this is they only talk about one side... how THEY feel walking away from the situation. "Oh I felt great after talking to that person!" But what is the other side of this? Did you then feed off their energy? Of course. Energy is an exchange! This whole idea each individual is an infinite potential vessel of abundance from the universe thing is a fallacy. It's a collective abundance that flows and swirls like all other forms of life here. Just look at nature, the answers are all there. At one time we may take, another we may give. A vampire to one, may be a boost to another. There are so many personalities that ebb and flow differently. The lesson here is to find what and who works for you, and you for them.
It goes both way, you just have to be careful not to steal too much from others and you have to be careful how much you let others have and who you let have the energy.
I've been thru ups and downs. I've never been a energy vampire. Never. Especially not to the people I call friends and family. So forgive and don't hang with em no more. I hope your family forgives you and stays away from you because it is a sickness, a disease.
I have no contact with any of my family members for this reason. I don't owe anyone my energy or my life. These things are mine to give and share, but at my discretion.
Lovely
Good for u. :)
boy do i get that. my brother's a total energy suck. yuk. thank goodness he lives across the world (comes to visit and wants to live with me)
Exactly
How about your parents are h there for them!
I just recently realized that WE ARE RESPONSIBLE for our own happiness. Being raised Catholic, I spent decades trying to (love and)- please everyone around me at my own cost. No wonder I felt exhausted most of my life. Thanks a lot for this very helpful video-
peace to you and yours.
I totally agree with you!! I ended up resentful trying to help others because I was Catholic. I am not any longer and feel so much better!! No Catholic guilt!!!! Ofcourse I still help people but in a healthy way. I do not allow people to bring me down now...but in case they do I bounce back quickly!
Raised catholic too!!! Am such an anti-Catholic as an adult!!!! Everything about it is just ass backwards to me. I love me some beautiful cathedrals and even symbology but I also love me some JESUS and 1-1 time with him!!
Same.
Marianne Wolf wow...me too.
I was raised catholic too, and the catholic guilt is real! Unexplainable. I rebelled from catholic church at 14 and never went back... But the iconography and images and churches fascinate me. I am glad to see other catholic raise people leaning to hindu ideas..
Chanting brings me clarity and focus that church doesn't do
Asian philosophies/religions often put too much emphasis on sacrificing oneself for others to the degree where tolerating abuse/exploitation is exalted as noble / compassionate / selfless, etc. So, this video helps A LOT! Thanks so much!!!
Dan Chung same with blacks especially the black Christian Church. Self sacrifice and suffering is praised and considered noble. I no longer believe this.
Self-sacrifice with awareness of your surroundings is noble, not blindly sacrificing yourself like a fool towards helping every person. Indian philosophy states that you should learn to help others with emotional detachment, because emotions and karma are intertwined, and you can go beyond being emotional only if you have the awareness about life and living, then things stop affecting you because you are no longer in the state of duality of like/dislike, hate/love, etc. If and when you want to help others, do so with no expectations, or don't help at all. This is how it should be. I've known too many westerners who help you with the expectation of being lauded for their generosity. Nope, all that goes for a waste, because the moment the thought of expectation arises in your mind, it is no longer a selfless act and it becomes a karmic action.
Well said. So do the judeo /Christian ones...encourage martyrdom...its rubbish to let people walk all over u. :)
@@sunnyk3770 great reply
@@HumanbeingonfloatingEarth Nah don't include the Judeo in that equation.
It's just Christians that fetishize human sacrifice.
My answer to the question: You are right in walking away and distancing yourself from someone who is toxic. The guilt part however could be from codependency on needing another's confirmation, validation or approval of you. You feel guilty, because you feel like you owe another person your time etc. and you are doubting yourself in your decision to walk away. Maybe it's time to take a look at how often your have a tendency to look for the outside world to validate you. Once you no longer need another person to approve of your decisions, your validation is enough...you no longer feel guilty, therefore the toxic person no longer has power over you and your emotions.
Some people make a living by just judging and validating, they make use of the our weaknesses ie wanting approval and feedback for our actions. If we can’t change that we better get such advice from only true well wishes and not those who take advantage..
@@rajagopal5532 Right but sometimes it's difficult to know who is toxic and who is not. I know a lot of toxic, narcissistic, manipulative people who are very charming and "love bomb" in the beginning to reel you into their web. So being able to validate yourself is more important than anyone outside of you toxic or not. If they are not toxic and they are giving you some kind of validation or approval then it's just something extra and nice to hear but your value is not dependent on it and it does not knock you off balance if it is there or not.
Interesting how they also start to 'love bomb' you once they realise you are walking away and are no longer going to be their punchbag. All of a sudden they are 'so worried about you' because they haven't heard from you. Keep walking. Don't let them guilt trip you or doubt your own judgement. You walked away for a reason. Keep walking and walking and walking and enjoy that fresh air and new scenery.
I have never been a person who seeks validation as I was the self lover but by being around energy vampires you truly start to forget to practice self love and remove time and energy for yourself. This happened to me and my mental and physical health suffered a lot because of this. I'm now back to showing myself love and healing.
@LaylaMay Thank you for this. 💕 If only I heard it years ago....
I just wanna avoid all humans ! Everyone is so draining !
tracy tracy yep
Avoid humans, embrace nature
...and puppies.
Humans are difficult
Ikr
I feel the same
I’m a INFJ empath so people dump all of their blues on to me🙄🥴I never bring any of my problems to anyone, and I only offer my best! Having an optimistic mindset makes people believe you don’t have any problems, so as soon as they see you or call you here comes the BLUES 🥴 Leave me alone👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Same for me but now I don’t answer the calls, texts, messages or the door. If someone shows up at my house unannounced I will not answer the door!
Lmao
Leave me alone
Same yarrr i don't know what to do cause it's my roommate and family members
Really, INFJs are Authentic they don’t pretend to be all light and love all the time they keep it real should do that personality test again.
I was cursed with being a person who actually listens and gives feedback, so crybabies love to unload all of their baggage on me.
I call them parasites slowly draining your life force same thing
Energy vampires
I have a friend, whenever we talk, she is sick, has this and this, is tired from work, or has some other problem. She is a negative hole.
omg i thought i was the only one. i have a friend exactly like that always complaining about something and i just don’t want those kinda vibes in my life
walk away if you can. You owe it to yourself and all the other good people around you. I distanced myself from a 'friend' several weeks ago, since then she's only shown even more how negative she is, made me realise the situation was even worse than I thought. I was distancing myself temporarily to get some space but now I am certain it needs to be permanent.
Sounds like she isn't really your "friend" then, if she is a true friend then try to help her to be more positive and if you are too "annoyed" by her or she doesn't want to change then you should drop the contact.
maybe help her? you know, your "friend"
@Silvia C. I had similar. Liked to phone 3 times a week and prattle on and it got so tedious because everything was always about her. You're right about more and more..
I USED to have many energy vamps in my life and the more i focused on "fixing the situations" the more they grew. Once I decided that Im the only one who controls my energy and made a serious decision to only say what I Honestly believe and mean and say it in a natural calm way. Speak the way I normally talk. No decorating it to "meet their needs" or be at their level. I am supposed to talk the way I talk and since its truthful and natural none of them can find a problem with it no matter how much they try. And i can tell, they are trying so hard to get me to say or do what they want. Since I don't get mad and I MOVE ON after I've clearly stated my truthful belief like an adult, they just give up. Im not going to pretend that they are making sense when they aren't. Im not going to be rude either. Just making sure Im speaking my MIND HONESTLY has changed what used to be dreaded encounters into empowering experiences.
Love that !!!
I have also experienced the same situation as that of yours and I think your "move on statement" is very true and I am also going to follow it. Hopefully it works for me as well.
Every word you said is true! And the best way to deal with such negative people is to act like an adult and move on.
Icannot Pretend well said , great advice , thank you , I want to copy and print this and paste it somewhere in my room to remember it everyday
Wow. Wow. Thank you so much!!
Fantastic that you have made the differentiation between TEMPORARILY or INHERENTLY! SO important to understand - if not understood, people can too easily cast aside those who are genuinely temporarily struggling.
I think we need to be careful not to cast aside people too quickly. Sometimes, part of our spiritual growth, is remaining in relationships with those people, but developing boundaries, responsibility for our responses etc, and not blaming the entire interaction on the other.
Finally someone who understands the difference, looks like many other commenteres don't understand this
I'm so glad someone asked this question. Sometimes you feel alone contemplating spending time with people who are close to you that suck the life out of you.
Great information! I have an aunt that I can no longer be around. Every time I was around her, I would feel so tired. Even get headaches sometimes. She would talk and unload her problems on me before I could even say anything. Great video!
A SEfeyyeh
HighPriestess Kathie i have a huge problem on that. People drive up n wait at my house n exchanging bodies n stealing my body n mind. how do i stop this and they are able to basically have sex with me n disturbing n harassing me like hell. its like tantric sex. its so awful. and at work your boss is abusing your hands n mind n body too and mske me feel like shit. that all is so since a decade and i dono how i must throw all this rubbish... pls tell me.
Strictly avoid her ...
I know that feeling!
This has really hit a cord inside me today...some people actually have to learn to be selfish to protect their own energy ...thank you for sharing this insight and for quoting Tesla!!!
Some deceiving people are Uplifting on short term and Downlifting on long term for your personality too I think.
Yes literally wolves in sheep clothing
So you've got a parent in your life who has deeply hurt you emotionally. They have mental health issue that they are not able to acknowledge. They are also have severe anxiety and focus mostly on themselves and how they feel. Trying to make you feel guilty for not wanting to spend time with them, when spending time with them can often be constant criticism. But I don't think they realise just how negative and horrible they can be. They only react. Bask in their own emotional needs which seem to be intrusive to your life. What are you supposed to do with someone so self absorbed? Logically I can see that distance would be the best way to preserve yourself. Try to assert your own emotional needs. But being emotionally manipulated by a former caregiver is difficult. You love this person so you don't want to hurt them, but what they expect from you is solely for their own benefit. I got to the point in my relationship with my mother where I believed she was evil. Now I don't think she's evil but a person who has suffered and been hurt themselves. And in some way- her vitriol made sense to her and was misdirected towards myself. I was the emotional punching bag. But I don't think she's capable of making this realisation. So what do I do? Just remind myself of this. Daily if needs be. Remind myself there is nothing wrong with me. And when it's a parent-child relationship that has broken down- it is always the parents fault. Basically, my parents split up when I was 6. I maintained a relationship with my father, a good one and my mother resented me for it. Now as an adult I can see how hurt she felt that her daughter could maintain a relationship with someone who dumped her and broke their promises of marriage, with two young children. I feel like shes just stuck being reactive. Never growing. Never wanting to be anything other than the injured party, never taking responsibility for their own behaviour. Never realising that the pattern of behaviour of confrontation and arguments only breeds more of the same. She's not able to back down from an argument. She can be a pitiful person. I wish she could be happy, but I don't know if she's able to get there. And partly I don't think it's her fault, it's just the way she's made. If anything it makes me feel so sad that she could feel so sad and alone and I can't do anything to help her because although I care about her. I really don't like most of what I've experienced of her. So who suffers more? Her or me? I choose me. I think I have to choose myself. I have to love myself enough to realise I deserve people who adore me. So guilt should be turned into pride that you have managed to take care of yourself and love yourself enough to not let other people treat you badly.
Thank you I needed to hear this
Well said, amen 🙏
this was like reading about my own life. Thank you so much
Wow. Do we have the same mom? 🤔
it's up on you to choose wisely where you put your energy in ❣
I love the business analogy, it really helps with the guilt we feel as empathic people. Great vid. Ta :)
I find this very challenging as a person on the autism spectrum because I find ALL human encounters to be draining and exhausting, so it is very easy for me to get involved with energy vampires and narcissists as I can't really tell them apart from anybody else.
Me, too, but I’m learning, and I hope you do, too 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
@@TilisuAOL Is there something wrong with me I keep making the same mistake so much I meet more toxic people recently I hang with toxic people from 2012 to 2019? Am I a vampire drainer ? I’m so sorry if I have to behave like this I’m feeling very depressed and need some deep help I don’t know what therapy help me I’m 26 years old now being on Autism spectrum ,ADD and learning disability and asperger . I have trouble socializing with people. People call me weak and people blame me from things I haven’t do and all my friends play the victim too and never gave me a chance to play the victim . Every time I socialize with girls they all ghost me and go for my friends in dating and friendship and is not fair I been trying my best to get a girlfriend or even a friend now I have nobody. I know I have tough time with conversation my conversation skills is too boring and toxic I know I bring up the past over and over again and keep making the same mistake and I repeat myself so much only one friend understand me and try his best to be nice to me. I keep reminding myself this in my head what if this person take advantage of me or what if this girl rejects me cause I been rejected so much or what if this new friend hate me because I have nothing to say just plain boring conversation.
Let me know what I have to change for my behaviour I know I’m a nice guy I try to stay away from people having a bad day.
@@andrewliang4112 I know how you feel and I’d like to talk to you about these mutual struggles we share just trying to navigate through the world and society. We’ve spent our entire lives trying to be everyone but our own authentic selves. Find your passion, and you will find yourself, and once that happens YOU will be found and loved for being your true authentic self. We’re all born for a purpose, we’re all here for a reason. We are all born complete; we don’t need a partner or spouse because we’re already whole. We’re all like snowflakes. Different souls having a human experience. We’re not our bodies or our degrees or our faith or nationalities… we need to learn how to love ourselves first. That’s when gratitude overflows and abundance and love follow. Spend as much time as you can alone, that’s how you become self aware. If you’re in a hurry, try meditation. I know it’s hard especially with adhd, but 5 minutes at a time first, then ten minutes…
Please keep in touch 🙏🏼 in the meantime, stay safe and blessed SSAB 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼🤜🏼you got this!😀
Friendships with other autistic people can be mutually beneficial. You don’t owe anyone anything.
The ex Narcassist was an energy Vampire, still drains me when I think about him!
Thanks Mr Dandapani, what brought me here today is that I am going through a terrible experience of being around an energy vampire since past two days. You’re message resonates with me very well, thank you so much. I just want to go on my own way even if I’ll be all alone ❤
We could protect ourselves from energy vampires draining us in many ways and still be in their company: Meditation, mindfulness or simply resisting from falling in, not engaging them.
Does that include rapists, pedophiles, petophiles, murderers, thieves, redundant complainers, lazy people, one who plays stupid so others jump in and take over to get things done? Run people run! Spend that time, having some fun with people who appreciate you. Perpetual Vampires do not deserve your time, love or energy! Soulless ones I say.
@@morgaineclegg8236 😂
Why would you want to be in their company ?
@@foxywhitetip7387 exactly we must outcast these demons
The longer you stay in their company, they will drain your energy for sure. These tips you’ve given should be employed if its an absolute must you stay around them. Once you can, get away as far as you can from them. Speaking from experience here
This is not relevant once you know how to maintain your energy, cultivate it. You only have this problem when you match the "energy vampire" frequency. Simply stay high and energized around them and they have no possibility of draining you. That energy is endless. It is bottomless.
Interesting....
So tell us, how do you maintain your energy?
You are right
1. avoid them 2. if you can't ,never take them seriously .
Well yes energy in infinite bt u cannot use all at a time thats why even if u eat drink but dont sleep one day u will die
Thank you very much for this uplifting remainder. I´m still feeling so drained now, after a very bad situation from yesterday. Slowly but steadily I´m recovering, you helped a lot. God Bless You!
Very wise words,I’m drained of the people that would rather complain about their problems rather than using that same energy to look for solutions.
Thank you noticed that every time I would speak to a particular person over the phone I would feel so tired. He spoke a good game , just that the tiredness was telling me something. So needed to hear this thank you so much. Peace n Love to you. And all who saw this video.
Mobile is the real vampire...
Lol! Yes!
Yes, energy transfer through text or communication. Sometimes you can feel energy by just an text message. You can tell if that person is happy or sad.
And if you're an HSP or an empath.. 🥺
More power to all of you!
i know. so hard.
@@tnt01 preserve your energy man, nothing's more imp than that 🌼
@@vaishnavigupta9111 trying, but always a challenge.
Great insight!! It really makes you focus on your ultimate objective in life that is finding truth, and inner peace
Wow this is so amazing! I needed to hear the is, I am rebuilding my life with my channel and with the work I do for others. Going launch my own business soon, but people close to me doubt me and drain my energy. When I am around them most times I am feeling down, and it’s like they look for drama.
Just cut off an energy vampire from my close inner circle. I needed this message, a reminder that it's okay to protect my own well-being. Thank you
This was really helpful. Temporary vs. inherent is an awesome distinction I have not heard before.
He's running a business, eh ;)
I completely agree that energy vampires are not likely to change. I think they don’t change because they don’t see themselves as being an energy vampire. Great video! Thank you for posting!
my mother is a professional energy vampire .says i'm liveing in darkness an she some how knows best for me when her life is in shambles no one wants to have any thinge to do with her because of constant high drama.. my brother says she ruined his life..he might be exagerating she greatly reduced the quality of his life but ruined it.?? .he has to search inside himself to better his life whitch is hard he is non expressive can't even hug another person..
l said enoughf is enoughf ..one day with her .made me depressed sad hopless for a whole day an a half..l can't afford the luxury to feel down l need all the energy for myself
my husband 3kids my whole clase my friends..l have soo much too give .
felt really she was blowing on my candle whitch is my spirit ..soul..trying to dime my lite selfishly so others cannot see me..
.with these of types of people make
bounderies an call back our energy to our selves giveing freely when we wan't
but having it tooken .stolen just feels plain dirty and your body knows it..hence the violated feeling.
Samanta Nicol Can relate, it's very sad when they are from our family. A challenge indeed
Your energy is just so peaceful. This world needs more people like you!
Most people I know are energy vampires including my mother
Having grown up with her, you will be habituated to your mother's negative energy. and therefore people like her will be able to pick up on the subconscious cues you give off. Start to train yourself to not be sympathetic to people who drain you of your energy and do it consistently. When they realise you're not giving them your time and energy, they'll give up and seek out new victims.
Temporary energy vampires, Inherited energy vampires, and the entrepreneur/ business analog; gave me a clear cut and to the point understanding. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 Thanks
Most of us are energy vampires including me. His speech made me realize that. From now on I am gonna work on it.
Thank you so much, although I was sure I wasn't alone this video proved to me I'm not alone since I am leaving and trying not to feel guilty. We are never alone and I want the world to leave me feeling uplifted and blessed. Difficult people taught me exactly who and how I don't want to be , and for that I am grateful.
Its called scarcity mindset and if you are unaware, then you will find yourself matching and giving energy 100% of the time. Vampire or even yourself.
Thank you so much, I really needed to hear this. I struggle to keep myself on an equal balance and so discovering about energy vampires really helps.....but equally its made me aware that I too can be draining when in a low mood, so thank you for your explanation.
Your talk was uplifting and energizing; thank you.
I don't feel that anyone has any right to my time and energy just because they are family. Only to my kid I will give the energy she needs from me, but she is already learning to use her energy wisely, and respect others when they need to be alone. It's a blessing to save your energy for yourself, without feeling guilty.
Yes, there r people who r ignorant and act foolishly without giving adequate thought to others' comforts or conveniences. But it is not a big sacrifice to spare some time for them when there is also a possibility of enhancing ones perception. Those who falsely think high of themselves want to "avoid" the other person because such behaviours r considered lofty etc. It is rather better to tell the person on face the truth- like, i feel bored or i am in a little hurry now etc- rather than sneakily avoid the person, communicating a sense of superciliousness. May be very rarely there r people who may be described as energy vampires. But i dont think i ve come across one any time for no reason. Sometimes a situation turns out to be energy sapping, but we ourselves (or some external situation) might have contributed to it, not caring enough to stear the situation to a better end! Perhaps i, simply, am an incorrigiable optimist trying to see the goodness even in the worst of individuals who r a threat to the comforts and conveniences of others!
I noticed the change in energy when I got a week off work. I've only had 1 week off work for this year, and with this Covid thing going, it's worse. I want another job and I feel stuck because I care for these people but its draining. Absolutely draining, my boss doesn't have anyone as back up, doesn't feel safe getting a back up with everything going on, but I'm just so fed up I feel awful that I leave her in a awful position. But it's not my fault. I need to let them go and make my choices because I'm just killing myself. Thank you so much for this💜 I'm glad I stumbled upon you, I keep getting the same msg but I dont do anything about it because of what I might cause. But you are right, I'm not able to uplift others if I'm being drained💯💯
My entire family is energy vampires and I cut all off with all of them:(
Thank you for confirming what I have been practicing myself and applying when people drain me, even close family members...I won't feel guilty ...☺
Wow, that’s exactly what happened to me yesterday. I hung out with someone who often times triggers a panic attack or anxiety attack when I spend any length of time with them but yesterday I got really sleepy being around that person. I was so sleepy, I had to go to bed much earlier than I normally do. When will I ever learn to not be around people like that? 🙏🏼
Great. That's what I have been doing all my life - avoiding negative people & I'm happy. Thank you for the video.
The most reknown type, as long as I'm concerned, is the accusatory type. For example a friend who's blaming you and humiliating you as soon as you don't do exactly what he wants.
Thank you so much big brother. I needed to hear this msgs long ago but timing is everything.
They say that no good deed goes unpunished. If you find yourself giving a lot to a person and almost paying the price for having done so, you are absolutely dealing with an energy vampire. Recent realization that I had.
People talk about so-called “energy vampires,” those people or situations or things that seemingly drain off our energy. You hang around them and you leave feeling tired-so they must have “sucked” the energy from you, right?
Nope. They don’t exist. That’s just a way to put blame on something external-that thing, out there, over there…that’s the cause. Not me. Not my choices.
I say this with love: We can all grow up now and start taking responsibility for our ‘stuff.’
We choose who we hang out with.
We choose how we judge them (which is really what results in the energy drain-we’re so busy thinking about how nutso they are or evaluating their choices, we go home later feeling drained…and then blame it on them! They’re just being themselves, you know).
In the rush to define who is and isn’t an energy vampire, most people forget how draining it is to resist practicing compassion for others.
We choose whether we blame.
We choose the to-do list.
We choose what we spend money on.
We choose where we work.
We choose whether our house is organized.
We choose whether or not to work out.
We choose whether or not to be informed.
We choose whether or not to be present.
Some of you might be reading this at exactly the right moment…perhaps you’re around a lot of people who you’d say are definitively “energy vampires.”
But again, the invitation is there to see if you want to be in charge of your experience, or a slave to theirs.
it’s all a choice.
For some people, that’s an immensely confrontational statement. Please (please!) remember that I’m saying it with gentleness. Also, I’m saying it to be helpful. Why? Because…
When we recognize that we choose, we are free to make different choices. For instance, choices not to hang around people who just aren’t a match for our psyche or soul, even as we recognize that they’re just as tender and fumbling and human as we are. If you stop saying that something external to you is the issue, it won’t mean that you have to put up with the person. It’ll just free you up to make a more empowering (and energizing!) choice.
make a list, check it twice.
Make a list of the various things in your life that you choose that might not be your best choices because you notice that choosing them means you’re feeling tired, drained, agitated.
what would you like to choose? Consider that “letting go” is not always the best answer. Sometimes (usually with relationships) “letting go” is just a form of running away, because we’d rather stop returning phone calls than drop down into our hearts, get present to what we feel, and try to work something out with someone.
So before you declare that you’re quitting your job, your boyfriend, or your stillness practice, be willing to investigate the in-between spaces where there might be workable solutions to your concerns.
Create stillness in your heart in knowing that you didn’t avoid or run away or tune out-you got present to what you need and then spoke into that.
LILITH Goddesses 93369 you can’t possibly find workable solutions with sociopaths.
Wow I just got out this type of relationship . Lasted 9 years. Now I'm rebuilding. Thank you for sharing . peace and love lsj
I appreciate you my brother from another mother ♥
I cut ties with an old skoo homey. Hav'nt seen him in years, dude grew long hair with 5 new beer guts.
After a poker party reunion, we all exchanged social media and now he pesters me twice a day, every day about his bs problems, how my married sis friend zoned him, and trying to make me do waste of time things that would have to involve the entire day.
I would always remind him, "yo member I told u?..I'm extremely busy pursuing my life goals and dreams. So I won't be available for anything social this year until maybe a party on new years eve."
The dude does not get the point and just devizes new schemes to enter my day, everyday.
Then he tries to make me feel guilty by getting mad when I always say "NO...Yo member I told u? I'm bizzy af..." It's like clockwork.
Forget about all that drama ppl. Life is to good, and way too short for shenanigans.
It felt good blocking him.
I mainly avoid ppl these days, I feel neutral/ content most the time around others and only now & then it's draining or uplifting and feel it strongly. I think I'm able to protect myself without needing crystals etc. I imagine a barrier and mentally say "I don't care what you think of me etc" whatever I need to say mentally when I know what they're really like & wanna protect myself or if it's a client I don't gel with I try my best to counteract what they're giving me .. depending.. on my mood lol :/
I came here after seeing a different video that shared how we should cope with disrespectful people and I didn’t really agree with it, but I liked this video I’m watching now because it’s more simple and self caring. The other video before basically said “we should not attract energy vampires .The cause of attracting energy vampires could be because you’re energy of confidence is unconsciously triggering their hate and jealousy you are causing them to have a competitive view or mindset, you should improve yourself and become a person who would not trigger them or make them feel inferior and jealous ” “ The only thing you should do is improve yourself and change yourself don’t change them because the problem is theirs and your problem is yours“ well it’s true that we should not expect them to change, but it seemed liked too much self analyzing and blaming yourself so I like simple better, just don’t take time on them ,like you said in this video , don’t feel guilty for not spending energy on them.
Everyone drains everyone because sometimes ppl have good days and sometimes we have bad days.
Yes that is true.
So by surrounding your self with a successful group you get more than you give..
Right! It's important to distinguish whether it's temporary or inherent to that person. I think it's great to offer some of your energy to someone who is temporarily an energy vampire. That's what social groups are for: lifting each other up. Just be mindful that it doesn't become chronic!
I've had to let go of some of my family and friends because they were DRAINING me of energy and happiness.
I notice they love to talk on phone and have you in their house cause then they feel more comfortable complaining on and on and repeating the chaos and draining you. I tested an energy vampire and said we need to talk at a restaurant more often and they refused and I knew cause they knew they would look ridiculous doing endless depressing rants and bragging endlessly in front of strangers at a restaurant. 🤣
It's many energy vampires in churches. They especially love the meet and greet time and the hugs. They attach cords to you if not care and they use these cords astrally quantum-ly to draw your energy even from a distance; much like a Succubus 😮.
Be careful with your energy Don't be too nice to them. Sometimes in groups you can see them coming, they target the nice and empathic ones.
1. Identify temp or perm EVampire!
2. Ask this question:
Do you feel uplifted?
OR
Do you feel drained?
3. Finally Uplift yourself!!!
This guy is life changing. Thank you!
Yesterday I met this girl and all the times I met her in my life I left very confused and drained. When I found out I had to see her again I immediately became very anxious, I was anxious, shaking, dropping things, tripping and feeling bad during the entire time with her and when I left, like you said, I just reached the other side of the street and started to cry uncontrollably. I felt horrible and slept horribly, I felt like this person brought everything bad in me, I even let out insecurities about myself I haven't talked about in months. She is very intense and has a wild past and lots of bad stories to tell, she always brings everyone around into her thing, even unknown people and everyone seems bothered. I wonder what kind of energy vampire she is. I'm still trying to recover.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lol hope you are doing good
I suffered a lot with close ones..blaming people. Blaming gf.Using my talents and goodness for selfish causes. I pushed myself until I drained fully with no drop in my cup. Finally realized no one's loves you. The only person I can rely on love is me. Now I am in exile and incognito. Feeling so blissful with god in my mind.
That's a good term "Energy Vampire".
They'll drain your energy real quick if you don't recognize it and cut it off completely.
Namaha Shivaya! Namaste! Thanks to the publisher of this vid!
When i talk to some people i feel like im going to have a heart attack. Vampire alert.!
Yes
Going to do this. It’s been hard for me but I’ve made up my mind. I’m worth it💗🤲🏽
Have other people noticed that energy vampires usually have very chaotic energy. Just had a energy vampire co-worker but I had to end that situation because I had to spend waaaay too much time with her and she had no insight.
Dandapani is such a Boss:) love his opinions and way of being.
No one in this comment section is an energy vampire... how surprising! Lol
Everyone of us is an energy vampire to someone else i guess depending on what level of consciousness we are in!
lol
Fudk you!
Your comment just drained me
Quite a few comments ive read admit to being a vamp 🤔
I was drawn to your video with your look! Totally feeling that whole hindi spiritual Buddha tribe vibe
It's become so bad that every single second at work I am bombarded with feelings of aggression...total uncontrolled aggression...and it's not coming from me...I don't want to start drinking again..please help
Change job
Totally agree. Leave them behind. Nobody ever changed any body by correcting them unless you feel deep love for them. If you dont have the pure love in you, without expecting anything back... please go away, safeguard your integrity 💞
I only have so much energy at the gym... and then my jam comes on..
This was a hard lesson to learn.
Once I feel you are draining me of my energy. I pull back or have limited to no contact with you and I do not feel guilty what so ever. I have to protect myself and my energy.
I feel like, I am my own "ENERGY VAMPIRE". I am serious !!!!
You are so strong, sincere, sublime, I am touched, blessings x
How to increase our energy in a great level where that can kill the energy vampires?
This is definitely the true key to a positive flow in all aspects of life ..
I think I've just found an intelligence vampire, I can feel my IQ doping second by second while watching this. Relationships are a two way street where one has to accept that other people are not perfect, and in turn the other people have to accept that you are not perfect as well. If you are so self important that everyone around you must conform to your own idea of what they should be perhaps you are the one with the problem and not them. Cults love to divide people and tell you it's everyone else that is negative, they are bringing you down; you should cut ties with them and just surround yourself with the "right" people, as long as you have a credit card you are welcome.....
Oh yeah he does say "everyone should conform to your own idea" AND implies it lol thanks for making my I.Q. go up. I think I'll take my new throbbing, intelligent brain and click some more videos that I'm predisposed to hating. Being hateful is a new age thing, which I don't do anyway.
Too good , true and practical.
Thanks Dandapani.
Technology is actually good (Smart Phones) as because of it, we are able to watch and implement Dandapani's shared Wisdom :)
Life screws up some people soo horribly. They need to be supported not abandoned, especially if they have meant anything to you in life at any point.
Hi Dandapani, thank you for your video. I have actually a question. You say (and i hought too) that permanently energy vampires should be avoided. But what about the law of the mirror then? If i keep actracting these kind of people, i should ask myself why. In which way this person is reflecting me? Just to avoid them doesn't solve the problem, from my perspective. Isn't it better to observe and investigate our reactions in front of them in order to learn something about ourselves?
I agree with you, I was thinking the exact same thing. Something about our reactions to these people encourages them to keep seeking for us. It is our reactions that makes them cling to us.
i think you may keep attracting these kind of people because you are a giver of energy - and you allow them to take your energy. it's not that they are reflecting you perse - they just want the energy because they don't want to work on themselves to raise their own energy - so they have to get the energy from someone else to feel good. As a result, they go to persons who not only are givers of energy, but also do not have good boundaries, and allow people to take, even those who haven't earned it. Dandapani is telling us that we should not feel guilty about having proper boundaries, and that we should protect ourselves. That's my take on the issue.
ZeinaSereia10 Well said - I totally agree with you, thank you.
To a point..... but people will be abusive towards us if we allow it. If we don’t give them the opportunity then they go and find another victim. I think what he is talking about is boundaries and self love. Not everyone will be nice to us and if we continue to believe that we only attract these kinds of people then maybe change the thought pattern to attracting happy uplifting people instead and see what happens.
Life is too short to permanently investigate unless you wanna write a diary, a book. Just cut them out for the good. Concentrate on yourself and maybe after, things will go better.