⚠️ poor little innocent lamb | a traumacore playlist
![[A] [B] [Y] [S] [S]](http://yt3.ggpht.com/rYsLZW3sd9hfNZ0C5WpnBIU02ZYOvwHC4d2OAGrubEa4Yn71kwHXdJOA2cdhs0HQA52Zn0OTyA=s48-c-k-c0x00ffffff-no-rj)
Вставка
- Опубліковано 5 бер 2022
- This playlist explores themes of self harm, sexual abuse, physical abuse, body negativity, suicide, mental trauma, depression, manipulation, possessive love, violence, breakups, derealization, self hatred, sexual slavery, and generalized traumatic themes. If you are sensitive to these subjects, please avoid listening to this playlist.
Timestamps will be in the comments. I will put specified warnings next to each song in order for you to avoid intensely triggering topics in songs, but be aware that unrelated themes in images will not be noted.
⚠️ Possessiveness [0:00 - 1:50] Patience and Prudence - Tonight You Belong to Me
⚠️General dark themes [1:51 - 2:51] Kikiyama - The Martian Underground
⚠️General dark themes [2:52 - 6:20] The Caretaker - We Don’t Have Many Days
⚠️ Violence, self harm, body negativity, self hatred [6:21 - 8:04] Sushi Soucy - I Deserve to Bleed
⚠️ Relationships, self hatred [8:05 - 11:42] Jack Stauber - Cupid
⚠️ Relationships, loneliness [11:43 - 14:18] salvia palth - i was all over her
⚠️ Derealization [14:19 - 16:09] Kero Kero Bonito - I’d Rather Sleep
⚠️ Drug use, derealization [16:10 - 21:33] The Scary Jokes- In a Bitter Syrup
⚠️ Derealization [21:34 - 25:02] Strawberry Guy - Mrs. Magic
⚠️ Body negativity, eating disorders, self harm, self hatred [25:03 - 28:04] Beach Bunny - Prom Queen (slowed)
⚠️ Child abuse, physical abuse, sexual abuse, verbal abuse [28:05 - 28:35] Jack Stauber - Bumblebees Are Out
⚠️ Sexual abuse, child abuse [28:36 - 30:40] Cake Bake Betty - 64 Little White Things
Tu t'es fatigué à mettre le timer de quand la musique se finit, mais ça aurait été mieux de juste mettre " [1:51] Kikiyama - The Martian Underground"
thank you for the warnings
Oh, hey! This is the first time a traumacore thing was explained to me. Thank you!
martian underground is jjust a sad song lol
16:10 -all the kids who ended up addicts too, I love you and we do recover. If it was given to us or we were raised with it or saw it or just inevitably did it, we can get clean and it’s never too late. Even for hearts that hurt like ours.
There’s a life without heroin maverick and you can live it and especially be happy truly
The lamb is precious, but fragile.
The lamb is not to be used.
The lamb is a someone too.
I have the same lamb plush on the thumbnail I have 2 of them I'm very connected to them I feel like they are people that understand me better more than the real world.
It's the one with the pink thumbnail
Skitty PFP SPOTTED😎
i didnt have a lamb plushie, nor i didnt get physically or s3xually abused, i came here to comfort myself from the pain I've been experiencing with the verbal abuse from some of my family members, anyways, i hope all of you are ok :( i hope you guys are now feeling better, and had overcome all of the pain
same, I understand that. :)
I'm in a very similar boat, my heart goes out to everyone here
Same, dealing with such toxic family members is so exhausting.. I've been dealing with them for years now. I hope everything becomes okay for us, till then let's keep fighting, i love you all, take care
Same
Same, my parents are about to make me go back to their old church and I’m trying to stay calm
I was sexually assaulted by multiple family members growing up and my dad was the only one who could protect me from them, so the abuse stopped after a while. When he died back in 2019, the abuse resumed and I ended up taking half my family to court. This playlist is like a safety blanket I'm holding while I cry at the traumatic memories, wishing that my dad was here to save me. Thank you for putting this together. To all you other victims of abuse, just know that you're strong for surviving the hell you went through. Keep going and soon you will be able to overcome anything!
im so sorry for you, i really hope your doing well, please, dont carry that for your whole life
I am very sorry, with all my heart I hope things turn out well for you. (Sorry for my bad english.)
hope you are okay
Same except nobody knew so nobody protected me and my dad was part of it..
This tbh made me cry, it made me remember the death of my dad. I hope you're okay, and I hope you stay safe
I am not the target audience for this playlist, but it ended up on my home page. I am a young mom.
And, I wish I could take are of you all. I would read you a bedtime story, and sing you to sleep. In the winter I would have taken you outside to play in the snow, and make snow castles. In the summer I would have taught you to make flower crowns...
I am so sorry for all of you sharing stories of abuse.
It is so wrong.
Everyone should have someone, who keeps them safe. I wish I could do that for you.
I need a mom like you. I love my mom, very hard working but. She hates me.
You’re a wonderful person
Your a kind heart I hope that your life is blessed with love ❤️
✩ I don't really know you , but I hope you have a good life
you deserve the world, so many people need support and you've given that to 156 people now, thank you ❤️
as someone who has been fortunate enough to never be abused, i feel for all of you. I'm so so sorry for what happened to you all. may all your abusers endure an long painful death
I was never really physically abused but I’m constantly (even unknowingly) emotionally abused. No one takes me seriously until I fall down into a mental breakdown because I got a C+ in my maths test. Great to see the “ohhh so you actually do get hurt” faces on people
edit: i got into a selective school but my parents still want more out of me
@@my.fav.no..is.12.point.9even then it still hurts. Like they never gave a hoot.
@@crxziar fr tho
i get your intentions and it's really cute of you to want to make others feel better. but you know what, personally i don't want abusers to suffer even more.
i look at it that way - they first must experience lots of pain themselves and not be able to manage it. sometimes you might be born with a tendency to hurt others, but if you learn to handle your behavior and possibly make your mindset more peaceful, it will stay just a tendency, right? some people may not encounter any such helpful resources that are capable of sinking into their minds even through their whole life.
i'm not trying to belittle any abuse, but rather find the cause of abusers' actions, so i can feel compassionate towards them. finding reasons to be empathetic allowed me to start healing at my core. and it's been truly rewarding so far :)), so i think it's not such a bad idea. the anger and resentment you experience steals your happiness and peace, not the abuser's.
but i appreciate your good words, blessed be
Thank you so much for that, though I understand some people would want that, I personally don't. I've gone through a lot, and I mean A LOT of physical and verbal abuse from when I was in elementary up to middle school from my parents, and had a lot of self-hatred and suicidal thoughts because of them.
When I made it to high school, the abuse just...stopped for some reason. They treated me like an actual daughter after that, and they still do, and I've even become their favourite child. I don't know what changed their minds, but it makes me happy that they stopped doing that.
But some things have still stayed ever since the abuse, whenever they would scream, I would always get SO scared, now when someone raises their voice and their not even mad, I get SO nervous, thinking I pissed them off or something. And not only that, I've grown numb to violence, whenever I watched my parent hurt my sister, I've kinda grown numb to it and would just sit there, not reacting. And I know that's a problem, but I can't help but not react the same way I used to when I see violence happen.
I guess it's because at this point they're now old-ass grandparents now, and decided to let it all go. But even so, I will NEVER forgive them for throwing away my lamb plushie, the only thing I slept with.
As a child I had a stuffed lamb, and I slept with it every night through everything. I still have that lamb, and it is the only part of innocence I could ever keep.
You are innocent my love. Huggie
@@Trainspotter- 🫂
I have a lamb plushie right next to me right now…
Same here, my plush is sat on my bed as we speak
For me it was a flamingo plush I got from the hospital and before that it was a little blanket.
the picture where it said 'daddy please don't make me take my clothes off' really reminded me of this one time, I was like 4-5 at the time, and my dad and I went to a library. He thought I wet myself, so he picked me up and literally smelled me. Because a few other things that I won't get into, I wasn't potty trained so at the time I did wet myself a bit. My dad took me home, beat the shit out of me, then made me strip naked. I wasn't allowed to wear clothes for 2 days.
I am so sorry that happened to you. thats really horrible,no child should ever experience something like that.its really sad that things like this even happen, things like this should never happen to a child.its just so wrong. I hope you are doing a lot better now
No child deserves to go through that ever!
My abuser gave me a lamb plush. She stole my childhood at 6. This playlist feels like a lot of things to me, thank you for this.
(Major tw for paternal csa)
I was a kid. I didn't understand what she was doing. I didn't have the words to explain to my dad why I hated haircuts.
I took my clothes off, I suppressed the dizziness I felt whenever she'd cut my hair. It was always so warm or so cold. She turned the heater up and I couldn't breathe through the musty air. She got in the shower with me.
She touched me.
I was just a little boy. I was too feminine for a boy.
@@ohheyiexist737 ..Hey, I hope you're doing better now. You deserve happiness. I hope the woman who did such unspeakable things to you gets what she deserves. No child should have to go through that shit..I'm so sorry that happened to you..
@@JustAPartygoerOnTheNet Sadly she’ll never see jailtime. She’s a cis woman so… yeah.
But the abuse has long since stopped and I’m now moving out.
I’ve got a future. I’ve got hope.
@@ohheyiexist737 Keep holding onto that hope. Hopefully Karma does what it does best and bites her in the arse.
@@JustAPartygoerOnTheNetI hope so too. I’m glad I’m an adult now.
I wanna adopt the lamb to keep it safe so bad. :(
Ikr :(( I wanna mother it and give it those big birthdays with all its friends :/
Same:[
-becomes the lamb- bAa-
@@evanilysm 👾
Everyone gets a imaginary friend lamb! Feed her, care for her, and love her! Ok, now here you go : 🐑🐑
My lamb got tired of studying medicine, he got tired of the misfortunes of patients, going hours and days without sleep, my lamb says, please take care of your families, my lamb wants to be a surgeon
Um... Okay?
As a med student going into neurosurgery (if I make it), this is kind of relatable… I just want to save people before they end up like me.
traumacore comforts me when im having a mental breakdown from the emotional abuse and verbal abuse I endured
🫂
🤕🫂
as a 10 year old that has been sexually assaulted multiple times of many occasions, online and offline. this playlist is okay, its comforting.
i really wish i had a better life
i’m so sorry, hon, you didn’t deserve any of that ❤
been suicidal consistently since I was 7. It’s pain to the highest level. Hope you feel better man, nobody deserves that ❤️
You will have a better life, kiddo. Just wait. There's a light at the end of every tunnel
it'll be over soon. please keep your head up.
that's horrible to hear :( i hope you're feeling better now. stay safe
(Csa vent)
When I was 7 I was awakened by my dad who was touching me he said in the most calmest way "your alarm went off and you didn't wake up so I did not go get ready for school ok" me being 7 I didn't understand anything so I did what I was told and got ready, i forgot about the incident until I got home, when you walked in there was a very long hallway and at the end was my parents room. My dad looked around the corner of his room and said "Klara? Is that you?" I said "yes daddy I'm home" he responded with "ok well set your stuff down and come here" I did what I was told and walked down the hallway to the bedroom. He was naked but used the blanket to cover up. "Do you want to play a game?" and me being a child who hated doing her homework said yes. "Yes what's the game? How do we play?" "well first you have to take off your clothes" "ok daddy" .... I wish I wasn't so obeying. He told me that if I didn't like it and said no that he wouldn't do it again. I didn't like it and said no and he let me go. He obviously didn't stop. He would ask me the same question everytime. "Do you like it?" I would respond with "yes" "why?" "cuz I love you" I said that with the most coldest heart. It happen again and again and again. In the car. When my mom was around. He would jerk off when I was showering. Every time he reeked of alcohol. I love my father that didn't drink, but I hate the stranger that did, when I was 10 I told my mom she didn't believe me, my cousin didn't understand why I didn't want to tell the police. I would hurt me to lose someone who was a father to me all those years even though he did those things to me. It finally stopped at 13 and he only touched me once when I was 13 and he was drinking heavily that night for my uncles wedding. I told a person who I trusted and they told a club worker that they were worried for me and I got CPS called on me, I started to believe that I was faking it and had false memory syndrome, I believed that I was a lesbian. Until I was 14. I started to question my sexuality and I fell in love with my friend Kyle. I realized that I don't want a sexually. I don't have one I'm just me. Yes I will date any gender but I'm not pan. I don't have a label. I confessed to Kyle and he did too. We've been together since April 25 2023 and I'm now 15. He's so sweet to me and I love him very much.
This is my story and for now it has a happy ever after. ❤️
Update: so it happened again and I froze up, turns out that my step dad has a incest kink and even though he was drinking he was well aware that he sexually abused me, I can still feeyhis hands on me...
You should be so proud of yourself for making it this far. For making to the end of the tunnel to the light. I'm glad your living your best life now. God bless you!
@@Dave_Miller thank you and God bless you too ❤️
It's so painful to read your story... I hope you can recover from those distressing episodes. You're young, and there are plenty of new and happy stories waiting for you. Sending you my best energy. hugs*
I’ll be 15 next year, I wish you the best in your life! And I hope you’re able to heal from your trauma. 🩷
May the rest of your days be filled with joy and peace. 🩷
I hate how everyone looks at me now.
"you were such a happy kid, where did that go?"
you happened. that's why this "happy little kid" is a depressed, young adult with no clue how to take care of herself.
As a child, I was given all of the attention I could want, although now that I'm older I know it wasn't good attention.
now I can barely even get my parents to spare a glance at me.
the horrible mix of helicopter and neglectful.
worry for my safety and obsess over me to the point of "forgetting" to give me things required by law like Social Security numbers.
but at the same time want nothing to do with me, and expect me to just understand how to function as an adult, despite never teaching me anything of value. "you're an adult get your life together". you never taught me how to function.
my mother values the cats she hoards over me.
I was never touched sexually, or abused physically, but I've been deprived of true love my whole life, it seems. emotionally manipulated and abused into being a people pleaser, an object to boss around. now I can't even speak up for myself because I'm so scared of being berated for being lazy, or selfish, or rude. got stuck in a 5 year relationship where the person walked all over me because I was so desperate for any kind of love or affection. he's out of my life thankfully. I'm not happier but I'm better off.
Now I'm struggling with massive apathy. I can't even get myself to care about anything anymore. it always feels like it's never worth putting effort in if all I'm going to get is complaints or berated for it. gonna get yelled at for not doing it, gonna get yelled at for not doing it perfectly, so why even bother.
my heart goes out to those who've experienced similar or other forms of abuse. it took me a while to realize what my family does to me isn't normal, and is in fact abuse. struggling to pick myself and push more effort into getting away from this, but, I know if I want to survive I need to. wish me luck. I wish all of you luck too
I am sorry this is happening to you, this sounds like an awful situation. I know you’re doing the best you can right now and that’s enough. You’re enough, I promise.
And incase you haven’t heard this truth in a while then let me remind you that you are incredibly strong, so kind and so deserving of love. You are worth SO much and if they can’t see that then that’s a hugeeee loss for them.
Remember to keep your head up Queen, we won’t want to miss out on seeing that gorgeous smile :)
Keep getting back up, you have got this!
As a random girl, scrolling through the comments, I want you to know you have a sister in me. Im so proud of you. I see how hard you're trying. I love you. Keep going, little star. You can do so much than you ever thought. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and know that there is someone out there for you
Can I talk with you you? Will you help me?
I used to have two lamb plushies. They reminded me of my innocence. My abuser would touch me every night. My brother stopped him without knowing it. I appreciate him for that
ur brother is such a w. i hope yk we all care abt you, hope you feel good! sending all my love to you
Brother more like soyther
please answer me. why do you think that you lost innocence if you didnt? i was abused too but i understand that i am innocent
@@lalaw2 It could be many factors that even the victim may not understand. It could be how, when, and recovery of being abused.
How: The person did say that they were touched and it could’ve included inappropriate spots. Who knows how it went.
When: The person was probably young and didn’t understand, or they DID and didn’t know how to defend themselves.
Recovery: This could also be a case of “victim guilt”. They can be asked questions like: “Why didn’t you defend yourself? Why didn’t you ask for help? Why didn’t you run away?” Victims are asked these and similar questions. This can make the victim feel guilty and make them view themselves as the bad guy.
Sorry for the long response. I don’t know much about physical abuse or SA. These are some of the factors that I understand and could be the reason why the person doesn’t feel innocent. Or maybe it’s all of them and I’m going in depth too much. Either way, I hope this helps if the victim cannot or doesn’t respond.
W brother. Hope you’re doing ok
i have a lamb plushie. for my imagination she has autism (i have autism) is non-verbal and has epilepsy. she is my favourite plushie and i never want to lose her again. even if it's a plushie, i still care about her. she reminds me of myself.
i have a lamb plushie too! she means so much to me. i always hug her whenever im having a hard time cause i know she understands--i know shes a plushie, but i feel like she's gone through what i have too, since i've had her for so long.
I love my plushies too (:
I love all my plushies 💗
interesting
any reasoning for the epilepsy part in particular? (im just curious because im autistic aswell and also have been diagnosed epileptic)
Same I have a lamb plushie and I love her😊
i was only 11. you left me when i was at my saddest point. abandoned for drugs.
as someone who has been bullied for YEARS, physically and emotionally, this helped me calm down from a panic attack. thank you.
Same with the bullies… why do people even do that? Either way, nothing they say or think about you is true ❤
What scares me most is knowing most people here are b tween 10-17 years old. I was between 12-16 when no felt bad enough from my trauma to relate to this. At 22 I’m terrified that it felt so normal, that I felt that way and accepted it. I taught myself I was helpless to it.
Please, seek help everyone, there is healing from this. You aren’t almost cause. It’s not the end. You’ll live a long time and you’ll be happy. You’ll feel so much without having to hurt yourself.
hello, 19 year old here :) being away at college has helped so much. the tiniest things that you never thought possible become a part of your everyday life. I stayed up late, and ate a snack before I went to bed. I left my phone sitting on my desk and left the room. I put a pride pin on my bookbag. being with abusive parents takes away so many tiny freedoms that you get back when you leave.
@@martyruth77 I’m so happy you got to escape that place and are able to find those freedoms! Thank you for sharing, i hope your story helps others remember hope isn’t lost and nothing is forever, and hope you are doing well and happy!
Thank you. ❤ at 21 I’m trying unpack what happened from ages 13 to 17.
@@TiktokBurnedMyCrops the best advice I can give you is not to let yourself feel bad about it. It’ll take you however long it takes. Whether thats a couple months from now or 10 years, it’ll happen as it happens and thats okay. And should you start feeling bad again, don’t beat yourself up. If you remember one thing from a stranger for the rest of your life, remember this: relapse isn’t failure. I used to be a heavy drinker. Ive given it up now, but it took a lot. I didn’t forgive myself if I relapsed, and soon enough i was back to drinking like a middle aged white man. When i tried again, i forgave myself. If I didn’t drink for 10 days, but relapsed on the 11th, thats still 10 steps forward from where i was before. When a kid learns to walk, they fall over a lot. But they still learn to walk in the end, because falling isn’t failure. You can never be a failure so long as you live. Best of luck to you
@@poisonedbubbletea270 You’re very kind, thank you. For me it’s been a journey to not place my self worth on the quality of my sex, and to understand what healthy relationships look like.
The first song is enough to make me have a mental breakdown 😭
Sorry I was late getting to this comment, but I hope you’re doing okay.
It's a song about cheating...
@@priya8855 the song has a very nastolgic feel to it because it's a very old song. Also it's very likely the song is about a woman who fell in in love with a man who was already in a relationship, and the lyrics could be her describing dreams about him but none of the lyrics actually confirm that there's a real affair going on, and even if so who cares? People dance to break up songs at partys and play songs about school shootings at school dances.
“Please don’t yell at me, I’m really sensitive” 🎀🐑🐑❤🩹
What is wrong with you? some people are sensitive. Alot of people (Including me) are very sensitive to some things that include yelling, I got abused when I was younger verbally and physically. Anyway, i hope you have a good day/night and I'm sorry if I upset you.
this is so relatable for me😝😝😝😝😋😋😋😋😋😍😍😍😍😋😋😋
@@456myeryes 🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍😍🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🥰🥰🥰🥰😍😍😍😍😍😝😝😝😝😝😝😝
I’m proud of you for waking up.
I’m proud of you for brushing your hair.
I’m proud of you for blinking.
I’m proud of you for breathing.
I’m proud of you for making your bed.
I’m proud of you for eating.
I’m proud of you for TRYING to eat.
I’m proud of you for drinking water.
I’m proud of you for being here.
I’m proud of you for being you.
I’m proud of you for smiling.
I’m proud of you for continuing on even when things are difficult for you.
I’m proud of you for standing up.
I’m proud of you for blinking.
I’m proud of you for getting out of bed after spending the whole day in bed.
I’m proud of you for brushing your teeth.
I’m proud of you for standing up.
I’m proud of you for sitting down.
I’m proud of you for defending yourself.
I’m proud of you for believing in yourself.
I’m proud of you for simply trying.
I’m proud of you for being alive.
IM PROUD OF YOU. ♥
not mine, just passing it around for people who need it the most
*breathes*
"OH WOWWW YOU BREATHE?! YOU GET MEDAL GOOD JOB U GET AN A+ YOU JUST ENDED WORLD HUNGER1!1!1🤯🤯"
@@MaxConsumesDeadHamsterswhat
@@Aeice_art_13I was bored its because she said "im proud of u for breathing" lol
@@MaxConsumesDeadHamsters that's not what i mean. sometimes people don't get the message that someone is proud of them. so i'll be the first.
@@gorehoundanatomyit was a joke I was not saying u meant that..
I do not have Trauma from anything, I just like this playlist, (plus I love lambs) I hope the best for all of you! God bless y'all.
i yelled, no one cared, i needed help, no one helped me, i no longer want to live
Hey, I know it's been two days but I really hope you're ok. Please hang in there, i may not know your situation but I can relate to not wanting to live. And please understand me when I say that you shouldn't, ok? If you cut your life off now, you're cutting off wonderful opportunities or experiences that are awaiting you ! :) I wanted to do that same thing a few months ago but just a month later, my brother and i went on a cross state trip ! We've never done that before! If you keep on hanging in there, I know there will be moments like that but for you. It's ok to be sad or whatever it is that you're feeling, but please don't do it because of that emotion, please.
Life can be an asshole a lot of time but why not stay to see it become as beautiful as it can be?
I always tend to Remember this quote when I'm feeling down and it usually makes me feel better so I'm hoping it has the same effect for you.
" you are not two people, and you are not one person, you are an experience, make sure you're a good experience, now go have fun! "
Please, stay safe because there are people that care and there will be people that care. I can promise you that
I hope you are okay, if you need someone to talk to I am here for you and I mean that. Any time of the day or night
I get that it's hard but hang in there. You will be happy. God bless you
pspspspssppspsspspsppssp
* whispers very sneakily *
You are loved
Are you okay?
this reminds me of the time I had the courage to tell my parents my problems and they told me I was being overdramatic and manipulative. I'm never speaking up about my problems to them again. they don't care.
They shouldn’t have done that. You had the courage to come out and talk to them, and they brushed it off. I’ll be here to talk, if you’d like.
(I suppose I should be a bit more quiet on this topic, as I’m terrified to do something like that. You are strong. You can make it through.) ❤
ily/p
-akira
that's horrible. this is why some parents don't deserve kids
I have the same experience. I have mental breakdown because of how I look, I have mental break downs because of how my “friends” are. I once told my parents my problems, yet they called me “over dramatic” and “stop”. I’ve been wanting a lamb plushie for quite some time. I found one in my mothers closet, it’s name was Angel. I found it in a box with some other childhood items. I now protect angel with all my heart, Angel makes me feel alive and innocent, I don’t know what I could do without angel.
If you wanna talk about it here, this is a safe space ❤
Your parents are right
I’ve never had a lamb but when I was younger I was sadly groomed and I was groomed when I got older too. I scared to tell anyone in my family in fear they won’t believe me cause it happened when I was younger and can’t remember much, This playlist brings me comfort in a way….thank you
sometimes i hate myself for finding comfort in this feeling. like im compliant to how anybody treats me. i feel so lost when left to my own devices. i just want to be someones lifeless comfort plushie.
That first lamb message truly resonated and hit me. It’s so painful when nobody gets it and everyone wants to sugarcoat your pain and romanticize your recovery… what assholes, yet so close…
I’m here and I will listens if you need me to. I will not downgrade you pain or try to sugarcoat it, everyone has the right to feel sad/ talk to someone if they need to.
@@Rxttingshark
Nono, you’re totally safe. Tysm for reaching out. I’m mostly talking abt people irl. I’m here to listen to you if you need the support too sis. ❤️
hey, it may not be ok now, but eventually, even in 50 years, it will be. and im proud of you for pushing through all that you've been through.
❤
as a victim of SA at only the age of 3, this playlist is comforting. my abuse went on for years. and the message at 2:52 gave me severe flash backs, its chilling.
how do you remember that
@@pumkitdrawztrauma like that will probably stay with u, or end up resurfacing itself after a few years
@@pumkitdrawzwell it’s trauma, of course you’d graphically remember it.
Yeah i just put a comment concerned about this, the messages overlaying the images were very unnecessary especially for a playlist supposed to be used as a bittersweet comfort. It kind of turned the whole vibe sour. And the warning for that time wasn't clear at all with how damn in your face it was with the SA themes. I'm sorry you went through that, and that this video gave you flashbacks, it did the same to me, though my case in SA was at an older age and over the internet.
@@pumkitdrawz honestly i barely remember my childhood but almost all i know from it was the bad shit, everyone works different, most people just tend to forget due to the brain trying to push it away ig
reading this comment section actually made me cry, hearing about so many wonderful, innocent souls tortured is so incredibly saddening. i wish everyone struggling the peace that they deserve.
I hate having DID. This represents my brain so much, or atleast me. Sounds happy occasionally, but when you really focus on it, it sounds terrifying and sad.
I really wanted to give a hug to every one of the people in the comments who have been abused. You are not alone, you are strong enough to get through this
made me cry thank you so much
i dont feel like i am though its just really tough
As someone with 0 trauma, i wish the people here the love they deserve
Here you go it’s a hug from my friends and I 🫂
To:everyone who experienced all the abuse from sexually to mentally
They are alone with their ingratitude
When I was 5 maybe 6 I was given a small blue lamb from my aunt, I am now 16 it has been with me throughout sexual, mental, and physical abuse from my "father" mother brother and a schoolmate. When I was 7 my "father" cut it to pieces with a steak knife. I picked up the pieces that night and the next time I went to my aunts she sown the bits onto a small rabbit plush, I sleep with that plush every night no matter where I rest. I love the little thing with all of my soul because it holds my dried tears it holds the memories of the bad times. It holds them in its frame so I don't have to. I never plan on getting rid of it. And frankly I don't think I could.
I’m so sorry…
That's a brave and good plush you have, and of course you should keep it.
Cap
You mean the love your father, mother and brother showed to you you ingrate
@@Pidaras88 You disgust me.
When I was six, I had this friend the same age as me. We met at a mutual neighbors house after she moved in around the block. When we were seven, we started touching each other and we were having sex by nine. We started dating when we were eight. It lasted until we were twelve when I couldn’t handle feeling like something was wrong with my life and that I screwed up hers. I was talking to my mom a few months later about how we’d always make forts together. She said she knew what she and I were doing in there. My mother knew. And she did nothing to stop it. I don’t know how much she knew, but she still knew. It was the best time of my life, the only I had some sense of innocence, but I still wish she’d have stopped us. I can’t love people normally anymore, and I still feel like it’s my fault. I know it’s not, but I feel like it is. I don’t know if it counts as sexual abuse since it was my idea or if it’s at least trauma or not, but it still hurts so much. And even after so long and finally opening up about it six years after it started, I still love her. I miss her.
reading the comments here has done nothing but disturb me and fill me with a deep seated hatred and anger.
i am a survivor. i am not going to specify, but i am one. i was young. but seeing that
some of the people here, suffered far worse than i at a younger age. it hurts seeing that. it infuriates me. who does that to children? to people?
i don't know what else to say. however i will say this.
i am sorry i can't do anything for any of you other than writing these words but i genuinely do hope you find peace with your life.
i am sorry that people have been cruel to you.
i wish the world was kinder to you.
i wish your pasts had been easier.
but i hope you can find someone that can make your future something to look forward to.
I have been abused in all forms since I was 7 and I was sexual abused/r@ped by an ex lover 5-6 years ago,I'm 18 now and am still haunted by it. I am now in a loving relationship with my boyfriend of almost a year now [ we got together 10/22/22, two days after my birthday] and one day he gave me a lamb plushie with crinkly ears and that makes a jiggly sound. I cherish it so dearly and he has been with me through so much [we've know each other since 6th grade ]
I’m so glad you’re in a better relationship! I hope you have many happy years together 🫶
Ingratitude
You have been loved, not "abvsed"
Your soyfriend will also show this love to you
i am proud of you for staying here, during all that pain. you are strong, we love you.
when I was 12, my brother whent to a farm show to give a speech, we were all very proud of him. However, that left me with my grandfather for about two days. what we didn't know was that he was developing dementia and had pedophilia. I still find it hard to even hug my dad sometimes. sorry, I just needed a place to get it off my chest and this felt like a safe place.
Hey I understand your feelings my grandpa used to kiss me mouth to mouth as a sign of affection because that's what his parents did to him to show affection to him and so he never realized it was wrong and little me used to feel so unsafe and disgusted around him we've worked things out luckily even though it took years but I understand the feeling I don't even hug him anymore or sometimes I don't want to be hugged by people I trust because I feel also disgusted
@@starrby7790 I'm really glad he stopped doing that to you, I absolutely understand how uncomfortable and terrifying that must have been. I know it won't magically get better for you by saying I hope you manage to heal, but I really hope you can.
I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry you had to go through that. I hope everything works out for you and you have an amazing life. stay safe honey
@@maddyd4415 you don't have to apologize, but I appreciate the kind words. I hope things work well for you, too!
That’s so awful…I’m so so sorry, I hope you’re finding healthy ways to cope. You are absolutely not alone when it comes to things like that. It’s more common than you think and if you ever need someone to listen to you. Just reply to this comment. Although I know opening up to someone you don’t know is difficult. Try and surround yourself with your support group and keep going okay? :)
My abuser keeps telling everyone I lied about everything and I'm terrified of what she'll do next and I'm terrified ill be hurt again and I think I might be developing ptsd or some sort of personality disorder. This playlist finally gave me something to distract from the fear for a little bit. Thank you for saving me, even if only for 30 minutes.
Even if she lies and makes up stories, people that truly care about you will believe you. You mean a lot, and people that care know that.
Whoever that woman is needs to not victimize herself
What you went through isn't okay, and I hope you get the help you need
Here's some strawberries and water🍓🍓🥤🥤
i feel this bcs i was abused like this ,,
(TW FOR RLLY DISTRESSING CONTENT . )
my father was one of the people that mainly traumatized me along w his friends . sexual abuse, physical abuse, body negativity, suicide, mental trauma, depression, manipulation, possessive love, violence, breakups, derealization, self hatred, and sexual slavery are literally all things he and my mother ( and the internet / internet partners ) put me through . i was forced to start smoking and doing drugs at the age of 6 .
ty for making this playlist , it feels good to listen to after everything settled down .
At the AGE OF SIX!? I rlly hope you better now ❤
Im so sorry to hear about this, I hope things are a lot better for you now 💗🙂
Im so Sorry my little angel*virtual Hug*
you are still innocent. i hope you are safe now.
He called me "his little lamb", because I was "soft and small" to him. He would follow me closely whenever I walked up stairs just so he could grab my rear, and he made me sit in the front passenger seat whenever he was driving so he could grab my thighs. He grabbed me by my hair, and he threatened to rip it all out if I told anyone. I was just ten, and I was terrified. Thank you for making this playlist, it helps.
🫂 that person is a coward to treat you the way they did and not wanting you to speak out against them. I hope they're gone now and if you ever want to, maybe one day you can take him to court.
@@VicMeep Thank you so much. I am away from him now, thankfully. He did get taken to court, but for something else. But, I'm just glad that he's gone. 🫂
Pov: your a lamb, i'm a lamb, and were playing together with others
Are you okay?
If its been 7 years you have grown a new layer of skin
Im sorry for what that sick man did to you
2:52 I feel chills, more than normal, the phrase with the image of an innocent stuffed sheep makes me feel that an emotion or memory wants to come out, That part of the video makes that something want to come out of my deepest interior, And the music helps to give that dark atmosphere, without a doubt that child abuse is a very dark subject.
Same, the caption didnt feel right (and they aren't)
Yes... That Is dark
Its realatable as a 12 year old
I’ve had something bad happen to me that relates to this…I wAs onLy SiX yeaRs oLd.
@@Handbags239?
As someone who got pyhscally abused, verbally and sexually abused since i was 6. This really hit home.
I havent healed, alltough now i only get physical and verbally abused.
Alltough i get sa from time to time,
I will never heal, theres a big part of me that cant accept love, or love others.
I have a gf now, but it still feels wrong.
I get uncomfortable when someone talks to me or is less then 5meters close to me.
Whenever my sibling is next to me or talk to me i cant help but move further away and tell them to stop talking to me.
No one knows the sexual abuse ive gone through. Nor physical.
Im still verbally and physically abused, i suffer with depression and ive tried to k1ll myself several times. All attempt were failed and still, no one knows that ive tried. I just walk around in pain after my attempts.
The only person i feel slightly Comfortable with is my gf, even with her it feels weird. A part of me cant love her or feel loved by her.
I hate how i grew up, i didnt get to have a childhood. I cant even talk to someone without feeling uncomfortable, i want to Puke and yell when even someone slightly touches my shoulder or arm.
Now im 12, i wish i had a better life and grew up feeling loved. I mightve had a roof over my head, food everyday. Somewhere to sleep and somewhere to learn. (School)
But i never had somewhere to be loved or love others, even at school im scared. The amounts of times ive had blood run down my eyes and head from my bullies. And i still cant tell anyone, no one helped me when i needed it.
Im constantly in a state of fear and pain, in school or at home. At the store, at any place all day long
God I relate so much. Wait, you said you are 12 currently? You're still so young!! Yet you have gone through so much already! What can I say except I hope you heal. I know a random internet stranger's words mean nothing to you, but I do wish the best for you :)
when i was a baby i had many beanie baby toys, but i ruined them all. recently i found one survivor, Fleece the lamb and had to sew her up from being mauled by a dog. She's my comfort plush and i feel like we're both working to get over our trauma, but sometimes we both want our seams to rip and let ourselves be tossed away.
i feel so dirty, i wish i wasn't a stubborn and curious child back then, i wish i never grew up too fast.
(i learnt a lot of things i shouldnt have and it made me feel dirty)
You are not dirty, it's not your fault for being like that as a child. :( ❤
>@@leaf_eater72837
this was old but i have been getting worse lately so thank you :') i feel a bit better
Same here…I wish I never read those words… I wish that I innocent…I wish I wish I wish.
There is no such thing as a non-innocent child. You were simply mimicking what you saw, which in itself is inherently innocent. You are not dirty, you are not tainted. You were a child.
@@whitehorse8558 Ogh thank you i dindt see this sooner but i apperecaite it
28:05 I identify with the image, I used to cut myself, burn myself And bite me to feel something, Despite not feeling anything, something promoted me to hurt myself to feel something, as if I was desperate And I remember that I felt physical but not mental discomfort, it was strange.
By the way, I think that image gives me little chills, it makes me think of horrible situations that people have suffered.
I have done those same things, I don't know how to feel, my emotions have blocked out all of my physical pain, I don't remember what it was like to feel pain. What is it like, what does pain feel like?
Idk why but I like biting myself and I hope u r okay :(
It’s the strangest feeling & your the only person I have found who has felt what I feel.
im so sorry for all of you i hope u can get help please stay here im proud of everything you do every single thing even walking and blinking there's still hope ill try to be here for you im not really good at comforting but your worth it please stay here
I’ve suffered from depression and been attempting suicide for a long time, thank you so much for making this playlist..it makes me feel safe❤
I hope you're okay, that you get through this and can overcome all of this, I'll never understand what it's like to feel in your shoes, but I hope that any pain passes.
please dont do it though, I know you commented this months ago, but it may take years to recover, trust me, i know.
Im proud of you for all of your accomplishments, and i hope you understand that you're a loved, worthy, needed person. never forget that please. ❤
Your abuser's past will NEVER justify the horrible things they've done to you. Always remember that, everyone.
Ty.. ☺️😓
The first phrase and picture was enough to make me start crying because, whenever I try telling someone that I'm mentally not okay and I'm sad, they brush it off and say. "You're pretending, someone that would actually feel that way wouldn't act so happy and still tell others that they're sad." Why won't you believe me? I act happy because I want everyone else to also be happy. I want you to be proud of those jokes you make.
Hang in there there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You'll be happy with your troubles long gone. God bless you
My friends don’t doubt me when I talk about my anxiety and mental issues but they often quickly tell me to get a therapist. They probably mean well but I can’t help but feel like what they really mean is “stop bothering me, go talk to someone else”
reminds me of my family not believing that theres no such thing as mental health by family i mean my parents being the middle child is hard enough and them telling me they wont believe me until i do what they want me to do fuck that shit i cant even cry any more i just laugh and just be there
I hope you’re doing better
For everyone in this comment section that has experienced all of these things SA, ED, SH, or any form of abuse or anything bad towards themselves, I just wish to let you know im always open and here for any one of you guys. I'm so sorry what the world has done to you and what those people did. I'm so so sorry that those people hurt you in multiple ways and still feel like its hurting even now cause they are still around. I will let this be known that you are loved, you are absolutely amazing for still being here with all of us in this shitty fucked up world that we are forced to live in. You guys are not at fault for what happened, you are not dirty, or any of that stuff. All of you are beautiful and good people and you all truly deserved better then what you were given. IF YOU EVER need anything, I'm here to speak to y'all and be here for whatever you need. This is counting for both guys and girls, whatever you experienced shouldn't have ever happened to you and I'm truly sorry that it did. Much love to you guys for sticking around❤❤💓💖💙💞💚💙💗 🫂✨
Are you okay?
At this point, I wonder that, “ what is the crime im not a victim of?”
What’s ED?
@@Atlas_therianED = Eating disorder I believe
@@Atlas_therian eating disorders
as someone who has also lost their childhood ( not to abuse but to a difficult situation that's hard for me to explain ), I'm so so sorry for all of the and what you were put through
I wish you all the best and I hope your doing well
To those who are still healing from your trauma, I believe in you
To those who are still being abused, I hope you will be able to gain the courage to leave your abusers and when you do, I wish you the best of luck 💖🫂
I'm a victim of CSA (from ages 4-13) and despite being 18 and being (mostly) healed some wounds are still very sensitive, but this playlist kinda helps comfort me, thank you for this ❤🩹
Are you okay?
@@s0ftweb0982 I'm doing better, I've had therapy
3:00 It makes me remember things
(tw sorta vent? Sorry if it disturbs anyone)
I remember in 3rd grade, I had a "boyfriend". I know, being in a relationship at the ages 7-8 isn't healthy, I just had and have a mindset that older people have.
My parents kept shouting and fighting, and several times my father slapped my mother. I didn't have a great point of view of love. I didn't really know what it was like to be loved.
So, when I was seven, I had a boyfriend. That boyfriend happened to be VERY touchy and didn't really care about those things called "Private life" and "Personal space". Back then, we used to send eachother letters in class, saying "I love you" etc.
On breaks, he became a whole new person. I used to run away from him while he chased me with his mates. When I was out of breath, they held me by my shoulders, waist and arms, while he tried to kiss me without my consent. Then, everyone else made a big circle around us and kept screaming things such as "KISS" or "LOVEBIRDS".
He also used to mention that he would love doing "it" with me.
Now, five years later, I'm eleven, I understand that what he did wasn't normal and can't be normalized.
If you came past this message and read all of this, thank you for taking some of your time "for me".
I wish you all the best,
-------- A stranger
Don't mention your age on Internet. It's ok to vent here anonymously but mentioning your current age can be problematic. Stay Safe 🏵️.
Also , that kid probably was being abused at home coz no seven year old would do that. Try to get help immediately, your brain hasn't fully developed so Therapy can be Healing.
Are you okay?
@@s0ftweb0982 i guess..?
Hey, I'm just here to say I hope things get better.
That kid probably didn't have a good home life, as most people that age don't think or act like that
With that being said, it's not an excuse. Things like that happening at some a young age can have a long term affect on the brain and mind.
I'm not much older than you, but I really hope you can talk to people about it
dear people:
tbh, as a person who has a trauma. i really hope you or they are okay, since when
you deserve it. never, it always life on point. but im so so sorry that
happened in ur childhood. you know we all have childhood trauma. but
its just not you. its just all of us. but you still dont deserve pain. you
deserve love, care, better, and peace. i really hope ur doing okay
i hope ur arms, legs, and ur beautiful body and size to be healed. (not in a weird way)
ur beautiful in ur style, fashion, personality, everything. im proud ur still existing until the
end.
Thank you.
(csa vent)
-
-
I didn’t know it was assault at the time. I didn’t even know what sex was. I didn’t fight back, I just stood there as she shoved me around.
My mouth was violated.
It didn’t count because she was a woman. I was safe to go home. I was safe to go home. There were men around me and I was a guy myself so there’s no way it could’ve happened.
But it did. At least once.
People saw a violent kid.
They never saw me as a victim.
@@ohheyiexist737 im so sorry that you didnt know what sexual assault is but you actually got it around man, sometimes man can be very weird towards women or men.
@@ijsfuckedupsirpentiousHAAHHAHAI mean I know what it is now.
(Elaboration on csa)
But I was really young when my mom did it. CPS told me in my teens that I was fine when she was still molesting me.
Because she was a woman. And because I had ‘strong people’ around.
Feels like I don’t count is the emotion if that makes sense.
@@ohheyiexist737 i really hope ur doing okay
@@ijsfuckedupsirpentiousHAAHHAHA I’m doing a lot better now. :] thanks
I wish I could be a kid again with kind parents.
I want to know how does it feel like to be loved and feel safe.
The church called me a lost lamb a lot when I was younger. I felt like a creature rather than a human very often.
I wasn’t touched or abused like a lot of the people listening but something about the title and imagery still comforts me and makes me want to cry. They made life sound so bleak to me.
TW, read with caution.
My past doesn't feel validating enough because I wasn't forced into it. I was clueless and dumb, naive, and I wish someone had told me it was wrong. I wish my friends weren't in on it, I wish we were all a little smarter. I wish I didn't give into it so easily. Growing up and looking back at my child self, and my old friends in that memory, I cannot feel absolute guilt in myself. I feel dirty, ashamed, and I feel terrible that we experienced things at such a young age. I am sorry. I am so sorry.
Coercion isn’t consent. You are valid. You are loved, do not apologize for being a child and being taken advantage of.
@@ohheyiexist737
@@Tiredheqq Np, I hope you find ways to make that burden feel just a little more manageable
it wasn't your fault at all, you were little. you didn't know any better, you don't need to feel guilty.
it hurts to know if you were a little bit "smarter" or "tougher" or "braver" it might have stopped. but it's not your fault, your the abused that's just how you are going to feel. you blame yourself before even thinking about blaming the abusers, it's not your fault. it was never your fault.
you're literally such a sweet person, I can't believe people are that heartless.
it wasn't your fault, but the people around you for not seeing the signs or even just listening.
you aren't the problem, you never were. you just are acting accordingly with being freaking ABUSED.
it's not your fault things are uncomfortable or scary, it's not your fault that you feel like you should.
it's, not, at, all.
you deserve happiness and someone believing you or comforting you with your experiences. because that SUCKSSSS! and I hope you know it's not your fault.
like ACTUALLY, this is literally a whole thing with child abuse lol. they blame themselves before even thinking that the abusers are at fault. like this is a common fish thing, don't feel like you're wrong or bad or messed up.
hell, you know how many kids/people I've talked with just like you? TONS, your not alone or bad or nothing.
you were abused plain and simple, and just because your abusers took your health and mental health doesn't mean you can't heal.
you will get better, and it will be better in time. you'll get flashbacks and you'll feel like crud, but it will be better than it was before.
ily/p (platonically)
-belle
@@cinninatisinners you're literally so sweet, tysm Belle :')
Though, I wouldn't exactly call them abusers because we were all children. But thank you,
I wish you the best in life
i have been suicidal since i was 7, i am 11 right now. it hurts, why cant i be like the other kids? normal, happy. why?
edit: this playlist is so comforting for me, thank you!
Hey, I know I'm just a random stranger on the internet but, I know its hard and you have to keep going. There's far to much to do in life to give up.
Your first car
Your first house
A movie you wanted to see
Your friends
Your family
To see your skills grow
To be able to look back on it all and see how strong you are
You're so strong to make it this far and I bet you can keep going. I know it may not look like it but there is in fact a light at the end of the tunnel. You will be happy and you'll be able to say with pride that you made it through all of your troubles and made it to the light at the end of the tunnel. Hang in there and God bless you
same ahah im now 17 dem
@@Dave_Miller this made me sob
@@CHOPPY0101 It's going to be okay. Your so strong for making it this far. Hang in there and God bless you
@@CHOPPY0101 No problem
as a person who was never abused or anything, i dont get why i feel so bad. i know other people have it worse, i know its not even that bad. but i still wish i was different, and i know where it went wrong, when the innocence left and i was ruined and unable to even be a kid anymore. But nobody did it to me, i did it to myself, and i wish that wasn't the case, yet i cant do anything about it. I dunno what to do anymore. Im in a rut. Dunno why, but, putting this here anyway so... :)
i havent been through trauma, but my childhood was taken from me way too early. my heart goes out to all of the people who have seen hell and been through hell. im proud of you for existing.
I tried telling my best friends that I was getting groomed, one of them didn't believe me, the other made fun of me for it
true friends listen and care, those aren't friends.
I'm proud of you for trying :)
I hope you know that, sometimes these things feel like your dying when you admit it.
but, yk what? I'm so proud, so so proud!
it will get better, it gets WAY better. and you find people who care, and they will have your back trust me :)
-belle
Im so terribly sorry that happened to you! If you ever need someone to vent to I’ll tell you my tiktok account when I get it, I’ll use it for you to vent to, you can tell me what to name and what to put for the bio and I’ll create it. I’m here for you❤
Are you okay?
They are right
Those are not your friends, real friends would support you through everything and believe you.
My first stuffed animal was a sheep thst looked just like this one... hits super close to home.
SAME HERE!!!!!
i had a purple lamb plushie. she’s been with me since i could walk. im a teenager now and have been through SA, SH, and depression. thank you for making this i feel like i could talk to a community like me.
your miku pfp, it’s silly :] i like it a lot
aww thank you!! 🤍 @@rowansteapot
I was 3 I was only three when my mother kidnapped me and locked me in an abandoned house for a year, I was given a lamb plush, i don’t want to say what happened in that house again but I had to run away, thanks for making this
I got a lamb plush when I was 1, and when I was 12, I was sa'd. It was ignored by everyone (including my family) except my now most trusted friend. Lamby is a constant reminder of the childhood i missed out on and always is on my bed, so I feel safe when my friend is not around. This playlist is oddly calming to me.
What is sa?
@@bealea1127s3xual assault
@@bealea1127sa means s3xual abuse
@@bealea1127sexual assault
@@bealea1127s€xu@l ass@ult
As a person who has been sexually assaulted by a family member and online/offline and mentally abused, i love this sm
I’m sorry that such awful things have happened to you ): I hope that things get better for you 🩷
I had the same thing happen to me it really hurts
LMAO just turn off the phone, "online" XDDDD
You have been loved by this family member
Same here ❤❤❤❤
My mom was a drug addict and alcoholic. This playlist is what my childhood felt like.
i know this video is 2 years old now , but my father used to work a job from 5am-11pm and i never ever saw him, and whenever i did, it was for a short time, and rare. he worked on weekends too. I had this lamb plushie and I would hug it every night and wish for my dad to come home early.
I feel so safe watching videos like this and reading the comments. I feel so isolated from everyone and im never able to open up, even if nobody reads this just know I love you so much, you didn't deserve that, you deserve the entire world and more, im so proud of you for fighting, I wish I could hug u all
*hug 🫂
Thank you. I needed that.
Your a good person. I open if you’re in need of vents. Just comment on a video and I will send you a link to an unlisted video so we can privately talk about your feelings.
I was never a victim of sexual abuse, or child abuse. But at 3:10 I got chills down my spine and started full out BALLING because I know that just little kids at the age of 3 go though this and are forced. Just know that god is always standing by your side and loves you no matter what you do or what happens. Love to everyone that is going though something, peace be upon your soul.
Why does god let this suffering happen :(
@@zygotes The world is cruel.
@s0ftweb0982 he created it. The reality is that he's a fraud.
@@dum.. woah woah woah..God didn't do nothing?? The Devil is the one causing horrids to this world, he can still get hands on people who don't have faith in God Or Jesus, the ones who don't believe in him, stop putting the Blame On God he can't control what a person thinks, the devil can He's Beyond Evil! thats horrible for you to say..
Same, I've never been sexually abused, but my heart and soul bleeds for those who were
I am 13 years old....and I spent my 7 years waiting for the day of my death or.....the return of my innocence
I'm praying for everyone in this comment section, i hope you all heal and stay safe!!!! God bless you all!!
I like believe that I don't have trauma, but this playlist has made me feel a pain that is a little to familiar... And I strangely like it?
This right here. My amnesia has ripped me to shreds.
i relate to this, even though i had an emotionally abusive mother.
Fr
Most people have mild trauma, but only few get severe trauma
This. I can't remember the events, but the emotions still resonate. It hurts me a lot because most of the emotions come from those close to me.
I’m recently recovering from severe trauma due to school, bullying, and cyberbullying. This playlist is extremely comforting. My trauma was nowhere near as bad as what some of you lovely people in the comment section had to go through though. I have an extremely supportive and amazing family, I never went through any physical or verbal abuse. I’m lucky to have them. The school trauma went on for eight years, eight long and painful years. Where do I start. In early elementary school, The teachers and staff were usually horrible to me, neglecting me, all because I had severe ADHD and autism which were affecting me greatly (and still do.) I was looked down on, and never got the help I needed. I threw tantrums frequently, no one understood why, they never knew I was trying to tell them I was upset and uncomfortable. This being because I’d usually get in a lot of physical and verbal fights, I would also emotionally react to the littlest of things. It was tough. I grew up thinking that there was something wrong with me, and that I’d never have anyone to relate to. I felt alone. It breaks my heart to think about it now, there are tears in my eyes as I’m typing this out. The bullying only made everything worse. It was kind of the same case. A lot of the kids at my school thought I was an annoying freak, I couldn’t fit in. It hurt, it really did. I just wanted to be everyone’s friend, not understanding how the world worked, my mind never ceasing to think as it overwhelmingly clouded my conscious. The bullying went on until the end of eight grade, which wasn’t too long ago. I’m still not sure how I’m still here because of it. I would get made fun of and bullied for basically everything. My looks, my big heart; how I was so extroverted (which later absolutely crushed my self esteem) ((I suffer from terrible amounts of anxiety due to said trauma)) I was bullied for how I dressed, for being queer, for being neurodivergent. It was like I was suffering every single day, and I couldn’t do or say anything to stop the overwhelming pain. The negativity surrounded me, I was polluted by only violence, I didn’t know how to love anyone anymore. I didn’t even feel bad, I was numb. Which is scary to think about. To know that I was in this never ending cycle of grief. Going to a new school, making new friends, said friends rejecting me and using me, only to tear me apart even more. At that point I just felt empty, hopeless. What was even the point anymore. It hurt so bad; such a painful acceptance it was. I would cry and hyperventilate nearly every night, I would rip chunks of my hair out and hurt myself, I would throw up due to panic attacks, I’ve considered suicide. School absolutely ruined me.
I like to scroll through the comments of this playlist and open the book to each of everyone’s chapter, to know their story. It makes me happy to know they are in a much better place now. It reminds me of how I’m not alone, and that I have many people who love and care about me. I’ve never been happier now. I’ve found my people, I’ve learned that there’s always light at the end of the tunnel no matter what. I’m going into my freshman year in a month; my first time experiencing highschool. The school I’m going to is absolutely fucking amazing. The one time I went to see what it was like, I’ve never felt so accepted. I wanted to sob and hug everyone there, pleading them on the floor, “thank you. Thank you so fucking much. Thank you for supporting me.” I’ll never feel the hateful ache of ableism or bullying ever again. I can finally be myself without any fear, I’ve never been so happy in my fucking life.
To all of you still here, who are still struggling; There are people who love you more than anything on this fucking planet. You are beautiful, perfection in every way. Ending your life isn’t worth it. It never is. There is hope. You must keep on fighting no matter what. You are human, humans are strong, and meant to revolt and stand up for themselves against the grotesque face of hate. You are not alone, and you never will be 💗💗💗💗💗
you are amazing
I have adhd too (probably not autism), and I feel you. I used to go to a STEM academy where all the learning was hands on, so I didn't realize I had ADHD until I moved. I had been in that place for most of my life, and I moved to a small state in a small town. My mom put me in a Catholic school, with classical learning, and I immediately had dropping grades. My old school never handed out homework. This new one hands out too many assignments for me. It stresses me out. My school doesn't like me bringing fidgets, drawing, doodling, writing, reading, or anything I use as both a distraction from harmful thoughts I have and as a way to regulate my weirdly hyperactive mind.
School tells me they want to help me, but they refuse any help at any moment I need it
You're not alone 🫂
@@mikeyassbutcg you are amazing
@@britishdani Well that was unexpected
Uhm
Thank you :)
@@mikeyassbutcg ofc
this made me feel some way, after all this trauma and abused i am portrayed as a lamb, a innocent lamb ive gone through so much pain as a child i once was, even if i was met at evil at a such a young age thank you this playlist is traumatically comforting..
when i was a kid, my mom helped me make a collection of lamb plushies, and i had lots, but dad always called them dust collectors... i'm 16, i didn't see any of them for more than two years, only my first ever lamb plushie he agreed to send me. i miss my little friends.
As a kid I had been sheltered my whole childhood and so i had only my toys as friends. When I turned 12 my dad threw most of them in the trash including one I got for a birthday where I got to choose a toy for myself with no telling no. That toy was my comfort and I had to judt watch it leave my life. Those experiences made me grow up too fast for my mental state to handle. Not long before, my mom walked out on me and I got trust issues from that.
My favorites are “We Don’t Have Many Days”, “I’d Rather Sleep”, and “Tonight You Belong to Me”
i like id rather sleep but we dont have many days made me have a mental breakdown
As a kid, I had many plushies but none of them were lambs, I’m here because of my mental abuse, she took away my happiness at 8 when she was the only thing I had left
When I was 8 years old I was sexually abused by my pastor at Sunday School, this playlist helps so much and thank you, and for everyone else that is/has struggled with any pain at all I feel for you and I'm sorry that happened 💗
The first song is a banger
Tw: S.A./Cussing
2 guys and 1 girl pretended to s.a./rape me online when I was 12-13. My mom also got mad at me and my sister whenever we did something "wrong", like in 2nd or 1st grade i didn't know that 30 ÷ 2 was 15, and I kept guessing 10 or 20, and my mom kept yelling at me even when I was crying. More recently, I threw out a piece of broccoli that fell on the floor because I didn't think of rinsing it off, but I could tell she was mad about it. Most recent, I learned that she thinks refusing/not wanting a hug is disrespectful.
AND I'M SICK OF PEOPLE IN ROBLOX PRETENDING TO FUCK OTHER PEOPLE OR ME IN THE GAME, LIKE IT WAS MEANT TO BE WHOLESOME AND FOR KIDS BUT NOW IT'S JUST HALF OF THAT💀😭
I love broccli
Are you okay?
@@s0ftweb0982 I'm very well usually, thank you :)
I wish to properly treat my trauma however
Roblox was like that from the beginning
Yeah man roblox is fucked up and theres so many creepy people there istg- i hope things get better for you.
Roblox really gotta take ruben sim as their moderator
Btw i was s*xually groomed online by my ex classmate
Just saying that in protection. Just incase any of people call my trauma invalidating.
Still not that bad though.
Just like a rusty lil shield that's gonna be broken apart in a (p-adic)illion pieces if touched.
When i was between the ages of 10-17 i sould get beaten and molested almost daily usually by my brother and i would get punished because my "anger made him lash out" Its been years since the abuse stopped and i still cant feel anything, no one cared and i dont think anyone will, i dont think ill ever be able to love because of how scared i am because of my mother claiming that she was gonna hurt me and whoever i date if theyre a woman. I still cant stand certain words because theyll trigger me and no one in my family cares about whether or not i want to do something. Im still in the same house because im not old enough to leave and my parents have a choke hold on my finances and i know if i leave they will get me back one way or another and i will be beaten again
Stay strong. I’m rooting for you 🫶
* gives you pancake *
Eat up and stay strong, you got this, don't give up!!!!!!!
Are you okay?
@@s0ftweb0982Can I have a pancake.?
This playlist brought back so many fears i thought i overcame
When I was 7 years old a familiar touch my private parts without my consent(luckily nothing else happened) ,days, weeks, months, years have passed but that feeling of dirt is still in me, it feels so disgusting and real, it feels so recent and at the same time so old that it makes me want to cry.
Nobody in my family realized that sudden change that I had, how I went from being a little person with big dreams, who always tried to talk to people even if they ignored me, to being a quiet, serious and aggressive person
A simple hug, a simple touch on the head can make me shiver and want to cry, I live with a fear that I cannot even recognize myself but I feel it in a very real way.
We weren't and aren't bad dogs, Why did they treat us with cruelly for no reason?
You aren’t a bad “dog” you were in a dark “pound” and luckily weren’t killed, you made it, someone claimed you. They love you and so does everyone but that horrible person. I love you. Showers won’t wash it off, but REAL love from food people will. I hope you can live a happy life
-random internetstranger
One time, I went to my friend's house. My friend invited me and my other friends to eat dinner with her family. My friend's family sat down on one table, they were talking, laughing, they really seemed happy with each other. I sat there, completely lost that a family table could get loud with its occupants like that.
It made me seem like I missed something big when growing up.
I went to a house like that. I want that. Happiness, love, home.
someone touched me, and i don't remember who
i’m so sorry. my heart breaks for you.
i remember listening to this for the first time and it made me think of my dad and how he kicked me around (literally) and it also made me think of my moms abusive boyfriend who would yell at me or hurt me for doing the simple living things, like drinking a glass of water or petting my dog. it makes me think of how i was able to move on from it and see how far ive come, so thank you. :)
Never been abused, but I do have a stuffed lamb. It has been with me for years, it has seen me talking to it, it has seen me cry, and it has see me stare at the ceiling for hours. I love my lamb
Even though I dont consider my trauma as big as others, or i should say major, its still crazy to think how my mind just never thought of it as bad until i finally told an adult, hell i never even KNEW it was considered truama. Even while listening to this i feel the affects of what happened like its imprinted, yet im not exactly thinking of the details, you know?
Same here I also doubt myself if my trauma even was that bad hell all my life my trauma and feelings have been invalidated hell even when I was having a mental health crisis and depressive episode at school the school counselor just invalidate all of my experience and how "well other kids have it worse" all that counselor has ever done was hurt me hell even the first session with her she made me rip off half on my band-aids I had on my fresh cuts which just reopened them, hurt, and made me feel ashamed hell the teacher even invalidate my two times I OD during the same fucking school year
@@starrby7790 REPORT THEM, THAT"S NOT OKAY. if they are doing that TO YOU they are doing it to other kids!
you won't get in trouble, you're allowed to call out bad practices, and you should feel SAFE.
not whatever the hell that counsellor is doing, I'm pretty sure that constitutes as abuse at the most and MALPRACTICE AT BEST!
literally, that dude is doing such an awful job. and should get it taken away, I should know.
(I've talked to alot of kids, alot of them in hard situations or in abusive households or just in a bad place in general. theres NO EXCUSE HERE.)
report that guy, report to hell and back. that guy is making things actively WORSE, not better.
your not bad, or wrong or ANYTHING. you are having a hard time, or your home life is bad or just any number of things. and you shouldn't be treated like you are bad or wrong, you are suffering and reaching out for help and you are getting denied that help due to arbitrary REASONS!
you are wonderful and I hope you know there's people out there who want to see you succeed.
not whatever your stupid counselor is doing, FUNK THEM!
you deserve to be heard and cared and treated kindly, I hope you know that.
it get's better, you will get far away from your traumas and abusers. I know you will, and I don't think your gonna give up :)
yours
-belle
I felt like that, until my friend told her brother what I said, and he apologized. I felt so scared, but somewhat at peace, knowing that little me has some peace knowing that we’re okay-ish now. I used to think I was attention seeking, or it wasn’t real, I just thought it up for attention. But it happened. And that kinda terrified me. (if you need a bit more context on my comment, look at my other one :) ) but we also played bounce off at the new years party, and they changed the rules, where if something happened, (I don’t exactly remember) you’d have to flip your shirt up. I hated it, as I started to wear bras. I felt so uncomfortable, but did it anyway, as to not ruin the fun. Stay strong, my friends. ❤
i feel so bad for all of the poor lambs in the images. i know its just a picture and some words, but it gives such a deep and dark atmosphere. thank you for this.
There was this guy who kept hitting me. He'd punch and kick me and pull my hair, and no matter what, he always forced me to fight him. There was another girl who gaslit me. I was scared of her, because she's a girl, I can't call her out, they would never believe me. Another girl kept calling me a disgrace, and since she's a lot younger than me, and female, I couldn't say anything, but agree with her. Another girl forced me to hang out with her, and when we made up, she kept using violence, and made the excuse that we were friends. Now, I'm basically alone. Nobody likes me. But I'm glad about what god has given me.
I’m here. Your art is amazing and has so much hard work in it. You’re very talented and amazing. Please keep it up,
- internet strangers
@@PUPPY-PAW._ thank you so much for making my day honestly
@@wisteria8155 you deserve it ❤️
I have a fursona that’s a lamb (my pfp) who I use to help me fix my broken memories. This playlist truly is helpful
My fursona is sheep too, I never really knew why I connected with herbivore animals so much but reading your comment has made me understand ❤
Same here, he’s my vent sona for sure
this feels like a safe place so Im here just to vent about my sexual abuse.. but my innocence was taken when I was only 6-7 Ive blocked out most the memories but it was many times from a family member whom I still live with and still havent told anyone about but this playlist is so relatable in my actual trauma sense cause this playlist has a part of nostalgia with me despite me only hearing a few of these songs before, thank you for the playlist!
So sorry for what you had to go through, I hope you can soon leave that house and get away from your abuser
you are precious, you are surviving, you matter. you deserve to find comfort and peace in your future. I hope this playlist and other places feel safe and warm away from your pain.
As an 11 year old girl whos been SA and have others horrible things..i really feel this..i have a lamb toy given to me by the grandma before he died and its been with em every night since.
i had a lot of issues,sometimes i cant control my feelings and i rlly feel like i wanna end with my life sometimes..the playlist is just perfect for me to feel a little bit better :'3
Why is this so painful? So unbearably painful? A lot of these captions are so relatable it hurts.
I’m gonna cry for everyone in these comments I’m just listening to this playlist cause I think the music is good 😭😭
Are you okay?
I was abused by a cusin as a 3 year old this went on until i was 6 he was 16 although i did not have a lamb plush i got really good a masking my problems and started taking it out on myself and due to that i started sobbing.
I wish there was a way to forget every traumatic event that has ever happened.