Thinking of you, Mark. If it’s of any reassurance, Sertraline has changed my life exponentially. Once I got over the initial grogginess and fogginess, got the right dose (that took about 6 weeks all in all), as well as finally letting go of the unnecessary, unhelpful and pointless sense of shame I felt about not being able to “fix” things myself, I cannot begin to explain the freedom they afforded me. They didn’t stop me from being able to feel, and didn’t make me a zombified shell of my former self - they simply allowed me to feel and experience every emotion, without constantly being on the cusp of a panic attack. Without the constant need for distraction. Without the constant claws of anxiety silently dictating my days, and demolishing my capacity to be fully present, to feel joy, calm and contentment. I apply sunscreen to stop my skin from burning, and I take medication to stop myself from being in a perpetual state of burnout. I can still feel anxiety, but now it is significantly more manageable and it presents itself in appropriate situations and circumstances. Rather than a general cacophony of chaos going on in my ole noggin at all times. Keep doing whatever you feel is best for you, you’ll know within a couple of months if this is the right thing for you at this moment in time. And if not, there’s plenty of other options you can explore. Be extra kind to yourself and know that you are doing the absolute best you can. You should be so very proud of yourself x
Perhaps you were meant to forget your tablets to get you to what you did today and to think the way your thinking. I don’t know. I just admire you for being open.
My husband has run out of setraline and forgot to remind me to order them for ten days. Mark, have you considered or tried light therapy. Maybe you suffer from SAD rather than depression. The sunshine in Greece raises the chemicals in your brain that keep you feeling happy. You are so intelligent that you are overthinking everything, I was guilty of doing that and realised I couldn't change the world, or the past, and it was all water under the bridge. Every time a bad or negative thought came into my head I replaced it with something that made me happy, and I told myself off. I said you are not going to ruin my life anymore. It really worked and I rarely let things get me down. And thank you for your honesty, you are not alone even though you may feel it at times.
Mark thank you for sharing this ... It’s so hard to know what the right thing to do is . Trying to explain to people the difference in feeling low to a dark depression can be quite difficult sometimes and sometimes it can be hard to judge it for yourself to . Everyone can have bad days and feel stress and experience lowness but depression as we both know is a very different feeling , it can make you feel nothing but everything at the same time and it can be a numbness and a dark cloud over your head that follows you everywhere . You obviously felt the decision was right at the time to start again with anti depressants so that means you felt you needed that bit of help and that’s ok . You then went on holiday surrounded by your family , beautiful scenery’s and plenty of sunshine , it’s ok that you felt happy in those moments, as I always tell people you can still have happy times when dealing with depression and anxiety . Then you come back and depression can hit you again because you feel that “ back to reality “ feeling . It’s almost like when it hits Friday and you feel that happiness because it’s the weekend and then Sunday night comes and you start to worry and feel low again . I know what you mean though it’s hard to know if you really need the meds if you feel happy sometimes on your own . I relate to what you said about the mornings being the hardest ... there isn’t a morning I don’t wake up where I don’t battle with my brain , I’ve criticised myself so much in the first 5 mins of wakening up , the worry and the fear of facing the day can be so mentally exhausting . Depression is a daily battle and it’s hard to know the best thing to do , i would continue on with taking them and see how you feel day to day , Take each day as it comes . That’s what I try and do . What works for one person might not work for another so you can seek advice from people but only you will know how you feel and if they are helping you . You are surrounded by so much love from Nadia , the girls and nanny Di and everyone else who loves you and they will be there to support you through all of this . As Nads always says just take it one minute at a time 💛 ! Lots of love xx
Mark thank you for sharing honestly what you are going through. We all suffer from some sort of depression and anxiety but when it gets to the point that you can't get through it and it's effecting you and your family's quality of life then that's when we all should seek medical help. You are doing the right thing by going back on your meds. Getting the help now and tackling the issue shows the love you have for your family. So many times people don't seek help and lose everything, including themselves. Take care of yourself and just because you are on the meds now doesn't mean you will be on them forever! Loved going to Greece with Nadia and nanny Di! She's a hoot lol. You have a wonderful family and you all are so blessed to have each other. Can't wait for your next family holiday trip! Love from Seattle Washington.
You are being honest and i appreciate that but i would say that you should carry on with the meds, just think of all the people who stop taking the anti depressants cos they are feeling fine and then just down the road a blip happens it can be a small thing but it can set of a chain of events that take you down into the depths of despair, you are a huge linch pin to the household if you crumple then everything else fails and that is a big thing to carry, no one wants to be dependant on medication but thank god it is an option, there is no shame in taking antidepressants, please persevere with the meds, Nadia will support you in all that you do, you have such a great supportive unit and a (hopefully) supportive fan base, you really are a top bloke but you have to love YOU to succeed, this is not a subject to be trivialised, only you can make the right choice. xxx
Well done Mark,such an open, honest personal talk, thank you! I was addicted to cannabis for 19years,its been 8 months since I had anything and I feel like I can feel everything! Every emotion,every feeling, every thought and wave of panic and worry...our addictions seemed to block or stifle the reality out, we're all fighting something,I go to meetings too, a totally different kind but they've helped so much.id never touch drugs again,the love and support from family and friends is priceless ♥️I feel alive! keep going, stay strong, lots of love and strength to anyone out there who's battling with an addiction❤️
Hey mark - thank you for your honest video. I take anti- anxiety drugs; I forgot mine once too and felt really stupid because of it. However Since then I’ve been taking them religiously for 18months and it is without doubt the best decision I’ve ever Made re my mental health. Prior to my meds I struggled immensely but now with them I have the ability to see “the bigger picture” and stay calm (er) when before I use to wake up anxious (heart pounding etc). By hearing your story I feel more confident to talk and prior to listening to you and Nadia I would never have told people I was taking citalopram due to real intense feelings of shame and guilt so thank you.... it means more than you could ever know
Hi Mark I can really empathise with you regarding meds and my poison is with 'food' so well done for acknowledging other types of addiction. You speak so articulately, eloquently, wisely & honestly! So thank uou for this vlog. Well done for going to your AA meeting and trying to understand your meds situation. I'm on sertraline myself its an add on to my longer term psychiatric meds. Its been a few months now for me with the sertraline but as someone else commented it seems to be helping my concentrated & taking some of the edge of the overwhelming all encompassing ocd &panic. Its very gradual but I'm getting back on my feet finally after a v long breakdown. I know some ppl who are on Sertraline too nd they've found it life changing. That said like all the other SSRIs it can be trial and error as has been the case for me for over a year or so! Let us all know how your getting on would be great to hear that. Well done on your insight and owning your Difficulties. X
Hi Mark i loved the holiday vlogs they were my daily therapy, i wont go into it but i am ill and bedbound and your like a breath of fresh air and im so sorry you forgot your medication and feeling a little low but many years ago before all my pain medication i was on anti depresants as i had gone through a 2yr divorce and a criminal case as i am an ex domestic violence victim, the medication got me through it all and i became a fitness freak running going the gym until i didnt take my meds and then told my doctor which id decided with his help i was ok and through the worst of it, although my mind still wonderd to that bad place i just felt i could do it and it worked for me and i never went back to antidepressants, i was very ocd clean freak and was always cleaning from morning to night and noticed colour changed my mood just like you on holiday you were drawn to blue and i do believe it can help, i had a dark wood bathroom mirror that i decided to paint white and then i covered the frame in white broken tiles and grouted it then painted my bathroom in a pale powder blue, i can tell you i noticed a huge difference to my morning mood brushing my teeth in that mirror, it was like i was framed in brightness almost like a halo which made me smile and which set my daily mood for the better, i remember telling my psychiatrist this as i thought she could pass it on to help others, but as you to were drawn to that blue colour which obviously comforted your soul maybe as it made you think of blue skies and the blue sea and that greek island, i think it might be worth you taking alook at colour therapy, its a very interesting concept on your mood and depression and i know it helped me👍🏼 www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.calmmoment.com/wellbeing/colour-therapy-boost-wellbeing/amp/depressivedisorder.blogspot.com/2010/09/color-therapy-for-depression.html?m=1
I hope this video helps other ppl with depression ,mental health etc your a good man mark the way you put yourself out there and I love how your family support you
Mark you are not exaggerating you felt good without your meds because of the beautiful sun the lovely place that gave you peace of mind and no stress they have done a lot of work with people who have anxiety and they found out that by just having sunshine for a few hours made them feel better. We put such a lot on ourselves , that it's so stupid who cares if we don't get it done that's why we have tomorrow ,start doing what you love enjoy all the things that give you joy like Nadia and the children the days go by so fast we will all end up in a box soon enough, we must all learn how to balance and not scold ourselves if we don't get a chance to finish what we started for tomorrow is another day I just love that saying . The only person that really cares about you is yourself first then comes the family and friends,maybe leaving your medication behind has help you take notice of your body, may be its telling you time for a change, Love you all just being you .💖
You are an inspiration, Mark. Keep up the good work highlighting mental health. Love all your holiday vlogs; so uplifting and had me laughing out loud. Your family are all great.😀
First of all massive well done on 15 years sober! Secondly you know your own body and mind and ultimately if you feel worse with the medication and that ypu are losing bits of yourself it may not be right for you! Good luck with this attempt mark. And thanks for sharing such a personal struggle. You inspire so many X
You are a very brave, intelligent, funny, caring man. You are honest and what’s more important you are openly acting and seeking help for how you feel. All the very best wishes to you.
You are switched on to your feelings and making sense of them today Mark. Well done for taking action and I am glad that at the time you felt able to. Have you thought about keeping a diary of how you are feeling and coping? I just thought that it may be useful to you to look back on and maybe see some evidence of what you were feeling and how you coped or did not cope on any day. It may help you see triggers and how you deal with them for the future? Huge respect from a fellow depression/anxiety sufferer. X
15 years sober your have done amazing 💕 I no what you mean about the drugs I have been on antidepressant for years they make me feel strange I am doing c b t thats really good talking about it helps xxxxx😘
Depression is such a rollercoaster I had the high and lows on medication xx but what works for one person doesn't for another xx thanks mark for your honesty your an amazing person do what you feel what's best for you xxx
Wow Mark I think you are such an amazing person, you are so open about your mental health, I find it so refreshing and helpful. Stay strong, you and you’re family make me smile everyday, thank you 😊
Mark I really admire you for one being so open about your addiction but also knowing that your unsure about what is the right for your situation . It is good that you are questioning if medication is the right thing to do , I have a thing about meds for me it wasn’t the right fit but I know they can work for a lot of people... Mark only you know what is right for you. I love how open and honest you are 💕💕🦋🦋
I feel saddened that young people are having to wait far too long for mental health services. It’s a full time occupation for many to get through their days. Well done Mark for sharing. It’s helping enormously when you are articulately explaining with such honesty.
Feeling a bit depressive myself after watching this video... You're a great human being Mark, so well spoken about how you feel and what you're going through... Personally I think you are over analysing and over thinking. You're not a drinker you're not a smoker. Taking antidepressants can get you addictive too not in a good way. Doctors and pharmaceutical companies are making miliions every day on people with so called depression. We all have a struggles in life but is a pill really a permanent solution to it? What's the point of going from one addiction to another? The key is to be more kind to your own self and find natural ways of heeling such a CBD oil etc. Take a time somewhere during the week to actually do what's makes you and only you happy without feeling guilty. Maybe another trip to NYC with Nanny Di :-)??? Wish you all the best Mark ! Hope you will feel better soon.
Your back to life!! Waking every morning with "this has b done, I've gotta go there. So & so needs to go, I've gotta do this, that" etc. You're making an unruly diary in your head 24/7 again. In Greece there was no work rush, must walk the dogs, do the garden etc. You let yourself live & go with the flow. You need to clear a day a week, or 2 a month to be Mark. Do things for you. Go enjoy something totally mental. Even if it's a day bowling, swimming, bungee jumping or running around the park like a loon, not for exercising. Give yourself the fun days like u had in Greece.
I won't share my long and complicated life story but your mental health vlogs/updates are like sitting with a friend who makes one feel so not alone...I know your struggle. Wondering if there are some mental health support groups...separate from addiction focus...although we all know our struggles are intertwined and a big complicated ball of pure chaos...that you could attend. You find listening to others engage at your AA meetings helpful and come away with coping strategies or snippets of wisdom. We are fortunate to listen to you share...maybe you would find the same benefit if you could hear other's mental health struggles...like an AA meeting. It helps me...just a thought. PS...15 yrs is amazing.
You're doing amazing. You 'beat yourself' up too much about things - which is your nature. You're a funny and loving man who overthinks!! Which is what we all seem to do nowadays! Sending lots of love and support. xxxxx
That's what we love about you, Mark; you're so open and honest. Not frightened to acknowledge and admit your faults and misgivings, i.e. you're showing you're human. Glad you took some time out to be kind to yourself and go to the AA meeting. Big hugs xx
You are so inspirational, I’m not in a good place at the moment suicidal thoughts are constant. I lost my dad in January around the time I first started watching your vlogs. They have helped me so much you and your family seem to lift me up, I seem to want to do more with my days if that makes sense? When I watch you so thankyou so much. Keep on keeping on x
Maaaark look at what went well. You went away & had a wonderful time ... we were born with everything we need. It's called self mastery & it's a work in progress. Spritualy,mentally, physically, emotionally & consciously. Sounds like you're doing good & yes our environment has an impact. Have you heard of the saying if you over analyse you paralyse. ; ) x
So pleased the meeting was helpful to you, Mark - having somewhere outwith the family, just for you, sounds like a real positive. You express and articulate so well - it's incredibly informative. Thank you for sharing x
Mark you're just so honest about how you feel. I really hope you find it helps talking to us. So many on here have been and still are in the same place as you and know what you're going through. Take care of yourself xx
Mark - thank you, for your honesty and your brilliant way of articulating your feelings, that so many of us struggle to do. Take my hat of to you. I recently tweeted 'forget Netflix, been home a few days and binge watched Nadia & family; what a lovely family' - agree with an earlier comment, there should be a hug button!
I enjoy all vlogs, videos etc., from your family, but the ones I take most from are your frank, self deprecating, articulate and serious monologues. Depression is such a battle as I know only too well, and so much time is taken up by it's power to rule you/us that sometimes it impedes us living life to the full. You're great just the way you are.😊
Mark really appreciate your honesty and sharing thoughts. All the issues you talk about with depression, anxiety, addiction etc will resonate in some way with most people, so hearing your experiences and how you are feeling really will help others, albeit know how much of a daily battle it is for you. I do think with how much pollution and just the general fast pace of life for those living in cities also affects us, so many toxins, over crowding and madness and the pressures your under with work and eking out a living is a huge burden of responsibility, it’s no wonder you feel as you do Mark. I think your an inspiration tbh, for those struggling to see however hard it is for you, you still win that daily battle. Good on you Mark 👍
Hi Mark, this was a brill video. When I started the same drug I was worse for three weeks and was worse and had hallucinations, after that it was like a switch. I was happier, better clearer version of me. I would try to stick it out and see how you go! Good luck and all my love
I have to watch these in small sections just because it is so close to how I feel the majority of the time minus the alcoholism (although my drinking before my child was on the unhealthy side). I now dont drink or anything else, i take meds for my fibromyalgia which decrease/increase my anxiety. You are so honest. I have just done a 20 min hiit and that was because of this video. Thanks for giving me a kick up the backside. Much love xx
Mark you know your own mind and body... I was on antidressants years ago and I lost all sense of living a full life while on them. I was numbed to feeling anything so I stuck at them and decided I wanted to try life without them and omg I would rather feel something than nothing.
The power of distraction is amazing, you looked relaxed on holiday Mark, you all did, the change of scene, the sunshine, the views, going at your own pace, being with your family, laughter, the freedom of doing whatever you want, no time constraints, happy and content, wishing it would go on and on. That’s what holidays do for us. Then we come home. To our own four walls and we remember how we felt before our holiday, how stressed and anxious we felt, and the same cycle starts all over again. The answer, keep doing holidays! ☀️😎
I am in such awe concerning your honesty. Just a thought: I wonder what a therapist might say about you " forgetting" your meds? Would they posit the idea that you might have forgotten them on purpose? Whatever the case, I am happy you are making an effort to get a handle on this situation. The colloquy is brilliant...
Hi Mark! Interruption at 5.52: I take Citalopram 40mg. I find that my anxiety, and depression revolves around the insecurities in world that I live in! When I went with my sons, 10 years ago, to visit their father and bloody amazing wife, on holiday, I didn't take my meds! (at that time 20mg) Maybe on a 'high' from having no 'real life' anxieties, I didn't have any 'withdrawal symptoms'! Back home, however, the 'shit hit the fan', and I had to get back on them! Now, especially during fudging Brexit uncertainties, and the sad loss, last week, of my faithful Golden Retriever companion of the last 13 years, the 'shit has hit the fan' again😖😟
Thanks for this video mark I can so identify with lots you’ve said my husband is a alcoholic who is 24 years sober , he also takes sertraline for what I think was a mini breakdown and they have done wonders for him ,although he also hasn’t been attending regular meetings for the last six months and I can definitely see a change in his coping mechanisms and will show him this video tonight 👍🏻x
Sounds like the meeting was helpful for you. You can always start over again with the pills...and be patient and see how it works out for you. I've suffered from anxiety and depression for many years and have achieved a balance on an antidepressant. It just takes a while sometimes. You are doing great so be proud of yourself.
Well done Mark for acknowledging everything. Could being happy on holiday be that people think you need to be happy on holiday so you covered how you feel up. X
Not enough time to take them out of your system. However, you'll feel the change. Be careful, Mark. Don't come off so quickly. Thanks for sharing. Love you and your honesty!! You help me ... And I understand exactly what you are saying. ❤️
I wish...my brother had lived long enough to hear you. The beast as he called it...won in the end. I just wish I had one more minute with him to hold him and tell him how much he was loved...warts and all.
I suffer from depression and anxiety for many years. It’s a very confusing disease but it’s like having diabetes, but it’s in the brain. When it’s in the genes, it’s one thing and how we were raised is another thing. Be gentle with yourself and take it one day at a time. We are not perfect and this world provides anxiety in us all. Just know we don’t have all the answers and perhaps we never will- we will always learn and grow until our last breath.
That’s very brave if you to share this with us subs I admire you Mark bravo 👏🏼 I’m sure you will help a lot of people by sharing this , I’ve suffered depression most of my life and I still do I’m on antidepressants and probably will for a long long time , so your talk tonight made so much sense to me thank you ... ❤️
Deffo you need to think of the moment you are in never think of the past or the future just enjoy and cope with the moment you are in and feel everything around you, look at the faces of your kids and nads and really take it in. You are a work in progress like everyone is really. I am addicted to food and i think i always will be but its how we cope with it that is the keyxxx love you guys.
When I was on Sertraline, it took about 2 to 3 weeks to start making me feel better. I think what should feel "normal" is different for each of us. It just takes time to adjust to what feels like our own normal. It's not a one size fits all, unfortunately. Just keep going each day, and eventually the twain shall meet. Being sober 15 years tells you you have the strength of mind to do it, one day at a time.
Im on citalpram... 30mg. Ive tried many times to come off... and even gone cold turkey. I kinda felt that when i was off them...just things came into my head too fast toi quick and i got very anxious loud couldnt see clearly..kind gobbley gook. And i just stopped talking... to family n friends. And everything and anything i cried at..but when i went back on it... i felt calmness clear headed didnt cry for no reason at all. Life was better again. So i now take my pills religiously. I was also a drinker...violence was my best friend. Im also Kiribatian...pacific islanders can not take any form of alcohol...ive now been clean 2 yrs. However at funerals and weddings i drink bubbly with alot of lemonade. And only one glass... im addicted to coffee...lol lol. I do know exactly wot you are talking about Mark. Love and hugs to you and family xx
Hi Mark! Thank you so much for your vlog! Your honesty about 'certain situations' has really helped me so much! When one is at home, and depressed, one tends to 'encapsulate' oneself. 'Don't want to confront, and talk about a situation', for not wanting to be the 'poor old me, I can't cope' candidate! All love and best wishes Claire Berlin
Thank you Mark for putting these how are you feeling videos on here, sadly there is no direct cure for depression, we can only manage it day to day. You are reminding anyone that suffers from depression or addiction that they are not alone and that there is help out there. We have to keep talking about mental health in this way.
We all fk up from time to time mark. we all only human after all. The main thing is, is that you get straight back on the path. Thanks for your honesty and for keeping it real xx
Honesty with yourself and the world is some of the best therapy you can get, its always difficult for us not suffering to fully understand BUT one observation I have is dont overthink things and the reason you probably didn't suffer when away was because you had many things to occupy your mind and seemed to spend some fantastic family time with people that matter and you care deeply about that my friend is what enriches the soul to its CORE!!!
Hi Mark, thank you for being honest & open. I'm on Sertraline, I hated taking them but I had a chat with my GP & said do you take them at night & I said no, so he said it would be a lot better for me to take them before bed & so I started taking them at night & noticed a huge difference & improvement. I've also in the past thought, I'm better plus these aren't doing anything, so I stopped taking them & after a few days bang anxiety hit me massively. Wishing you all the best 😊
Mark, I find you and Nadia incredibly inspirational. I have some questions about AA meetings that I would like to ask you. I’m terrified about what my future holds and know I have to do something about it..... I tried to do Nadia’s 100 days sober but just lied to myself....... I know I need help, but I do that typical thing of finding humour in a difficult situation. X
Your GP can fax your prescription through to your nearest pharmacy abroad, if in stock you can collect the same day. Thanks for the vlog & your honesty. Have loved the Greek holiday vlogs, so funny! X
Thanks for sharing Mark. This honesty will help so many other people. Me included. You’re living in the solution today 😊 Congratulations on your sobriety... One Day At A Time x
Mark the answers are never easy that is why living with poor mental health is f***ing hard. I hope you can take some comfort in the fact that besides all the support you have from family and friends we are also rooting for you. Thank you for all the work you put in to give us all hours and hours of endless entertainment. Thank you for your honesty, I am sure there are many many people who have been comforted by you and your story. You got this 💪🏼 x
Different pill but for the same reasons as yourself ..physically and mentally I felt worse when I started taking them...give it 3 month..then decide. I’m 6 months in and I certainly don’t feel 100% but I feel better than I did and that’s good enough for me at the moment. Keep smiling x
I hear you Mark. Thankyou for sharing. I'm a fair few years into taking antidepressants....went a while feeling a bit dead emotionally but now sort of normal, I have emotions but they don't get out of hand like before I took medication. Everyone's experiences are different I suppose but see if you can stick with them. They have saved me from myself.....I am a codependant with a touch of counter dependant.....fickle I say 😂 good on you for going to AA ✊
Mark you certainly do feel worse for the first 2-4 weeks of taking Setraline but then slowly you start to feel better and by 6 weeks they do work.. stick with them now that your home and back to the normally daily stresses and anxiety. I too took citrapam first and definitely find the sertraline work better with less side effects xx
I think if you had depression,you would’ve had episodes of feeling depressed even on holiday. Might’ve been a good thing you forgot them, suppose you could give it a week or so and see how you feel before taking them. I remember years ago when I was a kid my mum took anti depressants for a short while and I had noticed that they kind of numbed her, took away sadness but also happiness. I don’t speak for every one of course as every individual is different.
If you don’t try you will never know, nothing to loose try and if they help carry on. If they don’t there are alternatives nothing is resolute. Your honesty is what will help you on your journey x
Thinking of you, Mark. If it’s of any reassurance, Sertraline has changed my life exponentially. Once I got over the initial grogginess and fogginess, got the right dose (that took about 6 weeks all in all), as well as finally letting go of the unnecessary, unhelpful and pointless sense of shame I felt about not being able to “fix” things myself, I cannot begin to explain the freedom they afforded me.
They didn’t stop me from being able to feel, and didn’t make me a zombified shell of my former self - they simply allowed me to feel and experience every emotion, without constantly being on the cusp of a panic attack. Without the constant need for distraction. Without the constant claws of anxiety silently dictating my days, and demolishing my capacity to be fully present, to feel joy, calm and contentment.
I apply sunscreen to stop my skin from burning, and I take medication to stop myself from being in a perpetual state of burnout. I can still feel anxiety, but now it is significantly more manageable and it presents itself in appropriate situations and circumstances. Rather than a general cacophony of chaos going on in my ole noggin at all times.
Keep doing whatever you feel is best for you, you’ll know within a couple of months if this is the right thing for you at this moment in time. And if not, there’s plenty of other options you can explore. Be extra kind to yourself and know that you are doing the absolute best you can. You should be so very proud of yourself x
Holly, thanks for sharing x
Trish - thank you 💛
Sandra Lupson thank you x
Holly Anderson Thank you for this Holly, it’s certainly made me rethink a few things. Xx
Thank you for such an honest comment so beautifully put 🙏
Mark this is a really good, honest video. Thank you. Sometimes UA-cam needs a "hug" button
You're right Maeve Maeve, we need a "hug" button!!
Yes Maeve... Hug button 😊💜
Perhaps you were meant to forget your tablets to get you to what you did today and to think the way your thinking. I don’t know. I just admire you for being open.
My husband has run out of setraline and forgot to remind me to order them for ten days. Mark, have you considered or tried light therapy. Maybe you suffer from SAD rather than depression. The sunshine in Greece raises the chemicals in your brain that keep you feeling happy. You are so intelligent that you are overthinking everything, I was guilty of doing that and realised I couldn't change the world, or the past, and it was all water under the bridge. Every time a bad or negative thought came into my head I replaced it with something that made me happy, and I told myself off. I said you are not going to ruin my life anymore. It really worked and I rarely let things get me down. And thank you for your honesty, you are not alone even though you may feel it at times.
Mark thank you for sharing this ... It’s so hard to know what the right thing to do is . Trying to explain to people the difference in feeling low to a dark depression can be quite difficult sometimes and sometimes it can be hard to judge it for yourself to . Everyone can have bad days and feel stress and experience lowness but depression as we both know is a very different feeling , it can make you feel nothing but everything at the same time and it can be a numbness and a dark cloud over your head that follows you everywhere . You obviously felt the decision was right at the time to start again with anti depressants so that means you felt you needed that bit of help and that’s ok . You then went on holiday surrounded by your family , beautiful scenery’s and plenty of sunshine , it’s ok that you felt happy in those moments, as I always tell people you can still have happy times when dealing with depression and anxiety . Then you come back and depression can hit you again because you feel that “ back to reality “ feeling . It’s almost like when it hits Friday and you feel that happiness because it’s the weekend and then Sunday night comes and you start to worry and feel low again . I know what you mean though it’s hard to know if you really need the meds if you feel happy sometimes on your own . I relate to what you said about the mornings being the hardest ... there isn’t a morning I don’t wake up where I don’t battle with my brain , I’ve criticised myself so much in the first 5 mins of wakening up , the worry and the fear of facing the day can be so mentally exhausting . Depression is a daily battle and it’s hard to know the best thing to do , i would continue on with taking them and see how you feel day to day , Take each day as it comes . That’s what I try and do . What works for one person might not work for another so you can seek advice from people but only you will know how you feel and if they are helping you . You are surrounded by so much love from Nadia , the girls and nanny Di and everyone else who loves you and they will be there to support you through all of this . As Nads always says just take it one minute at a time 💛 ! Lots of love xx
zoë agnew you write beautifully on the subject ... and sensitively ... THANKYOU for sharing ... as ever sending love xxx
The Dog House thanks mark and same to you 💛
First of all Congratulations. Secondly I could sit and listen to you all day you have a very calming voice.
Mark thank you for sharing honestly what you are going through. We all suffer from some sort of depression and anxiety but when it gets to the point that you can't get through it and it's effecting you and your family's quality of life then that's when we all should seek medical help. You are doing the right thing by going back on your meds. Getting the help now and tackling the issue shows the love you have for your family. So many times people don't seek help and lose everything, including themselves. Take care of yourself and just because you are on the meds now doesn't mean you will be on them forever! Loved going to Greece with Nadia and nanny Di! She's a hoot lol. You have a wonderful family and you all are so blessed to have each other. Can't wait for your next family holiday trip! Love from Seattle Washington.
You are being honest and i appreciate that but i would say that you should carry on with the meds, just think of all the people who stop taking the anti depressants cos they are feeling fine and then just down the road a blip happens it can be a small thing but it can set of a chain of events that take you down into the depths of despair, you are a huge linch pin to the household if you crumple then everything else fails and that is a big thing to carry, no one wants to be dependant on medication but thank god it is an option, there is no shame in taking antidepressants, please persevere with the meds, Nadia will support you in all that you do, you have such a great supportive unit and a (hopefully) supportive fan base, you really are a top bloke but you have to love YOU to succeed, this is not a subject to be trivialised, only you can make the right choice. xxx
Well done Mark,such an open, honest personal talk, thank you! I was addicted to cannabis for 19years,its been 8 months since I had anything and I feel like I can feel everything! Every emotion,every feeling, every thought and wave of panic and worry...our addictions seemed to block or stifle the reality out, we're all fighting something,I go to meetings too, a totally different kind but they've helped so much.id never touch drugs again,the love and support from family and friends is priceless ♥️I feel alive! keep going, stay strong, lots of love and strength to anyone out there who's battling with an addiction❤️
Mark know this, you have made a difference to a lot of people's mental health with your honest conversations on this topic. A huge thank you.
Hey mark - thank you for your honest video. I take anti- anxiety drugs; I forgot mine once too and felt really stupid because of it. However Since then I’ve been taking them religiously for 18months and it is without doubt the best decision I’ve ever
Made re my mental health. Prior to my meds I struggled immensely but now with them I have the ability to see “the bigger picture” and stay calm (er) when before I use to wake up anxious (heart pounding etc). By hearing your story I feel more confident to talk and prior to listening to you and Nadia I would never have told people I was taking citalopram due to real intense feelings of shame and guilt so thank you.... it means more than you could ever know
Take care, and be kind to yourself. Nothing wrong with starting again... thing is to keep going. Lots of love x
Hi Mark I can really empathise with you regarding meds and my poison is with 'food' so well done for acknowledging other types of addiction. You speak so articulately, eloquently, wisely & honestly! So thank uou for this vlog. Well done for going to your AA meeting and trying to understand your meds situation. I'm on sertraline myself its an add on to my longer term psychiatric meds. Its been a few months now for me with the sertraline but as someone else commented it seems to be helping my concentrated & taking some of the edge of the overwhelming all encompassing ocd &panic. Its very gradual but I'm getting back on my feet finally after a v long breakdown. I know some ppl who are on Sertraline too nd they've found it life changing. That said like all the other SSRIs it can be trial and error as has been the case for me for over a year or so!
Let us all know how your getting on would be great to hear that. Well done on your insight and owning your Difficulties. X
Mark!! This hit me hard! Thank you for including 'food' im struggling! Very brave to face the camara and speak so honestly! Thank you x
Hi Mark i loved the holiday vlogs they were my daily therapy, i wont go into it but i am ill and bedbound and your like a breath of fresh air and im so sorry you forgot your medication and feeling a little low but many years ago before all my pain medication i was on anti depresants as i had gone through a 2yr divorce and a criminal case as i am an ex domestic violence victim, the medication got me through it all and i became a fitness freak running going the gym until i didnt take my meds and then told my doctor which id decided with his help i was ok and through the worst of it, although my mind still wonderd to that bad place i just felt i could do it and it worked for me and i never went back to antidepressants, i was very ocd clean freak and was always cleaning from morning to night and noticed colour changed my mood just like you on holiday you were drawn to blue and i do believe it can help, i had a dark wood bathroom mirror that i decided to paint white and then i covered the frame in white broken tiles and grouted it then painted my bathroom in a pale powder blue, i can tell you i noticed a huge difference to my morning mood brushing my teeth in that mirror, it was like i was framed in brightness almost like a halo which made me smile and which set my daily mood for the better, i remember telling my psychiatrist this as i thought she could pass it on to help others, but as you to were drawn to that blue colour which obviously comforted your soul maybe as it made you think of blue skies and the blue sea and that greek island, i think it might be worth you taking alook at colour therapy, its a very interesting concept on your mood and depression and i know it helped me👍🏼 www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.calmmoment.com/wellbeing/colour-therapy-boost-wellbeing/amp/depressivedisorder.blogspot.com/2010/09/color-therapy-for-depression.html?m=1
It's really is only one day at a time . Good for you to go back, all the best always.♥
I hope this video helps other ppl with depression ,mental health etc your a good man mark the way you put yourself out there and I love how your family support you
Mark you are not exaggerating you felt good without your meds because of the beautiful sun the lovely place that gave you peace of mind and no stress they have done a lot of work with people who have anxiety and they found out that by just having sunshine for a few hours made them feel better.
We put such a lot on ourselves , that it's so stupid who cares if we don't get it done that's why we have tomorrow ,start doing what you love enjoy all the things that give you joy like Nadia and the children the days go by so fast we will all end up in a box soon enough, we must all learn how to balance and not scold ourselves if we don't get a chance to finish what we started for tomorrow is another day I just love that saying .
The only person that really cares about you is yourself first then comes the family and friends,maybe leaving your medication behind has help you take notice of your body, may be its telling you time for a change,
Love you all just being you .💖
Mark thank you for all the amazing information you are an amazing person yourself.
You are an inspiration, Mark. Keep up the good work highlighting mental health. Love all your holiday vlogs; so uplifting and had me laughing out loud. Your family are all great.😀
I needed this today. Thank you Mark.
First of all massive well done on 15 years sober! Secondly you know your own body and mind and ultimately if you feel worse with the medication and that ypu are losing bits of yourself it may not be right for you! Good luck with this attempt mark. And thanks for sharing such a personal struggle. You inspire so many X
You are a very brave, intelligent, funny, caring man. You are honest and what’s more important you are openly acting and seeking help for how you feel. All the very best wishes to you.
You are switched on to your feelings and making sense of them today Mark. Well done for taking action and I am glad that at the time you felt able to. Have you thought about keeping a diary of how you are feeling and coping? I just thought that it may be useful to you to look back on and maybe see some evidence of what you were feeling and how you coped or did not cope on any day. It may help you see triggers and how you deal with them for the future? Huge respect from a fellow depression/anxiety sufferer. X
15 years sober your have done amazing 💕 I no what you mean about the drugs I have been on antidepressant for years they make me feel strange I am doing c b t thats really good talking about it helps xxxxx😘
Depression is such a rollercoaster I had the high and lows on medication xx but what works for one person doesn't for another xx thanks mark for your honesty your an amazing person do what you feel what's best for you xxx
Wow Mark I think you are such an amazing person, you are so open about your mental health, I find it so refreshing and helpful. Stay strong, you and you’re family make me smile everyday, thank you 😊
Mark I really admire you for one being so open about your addiction but also knowing that your unsure about what is the right for your situation . It is good that you are questioning if medication is the right thing to do , I have a thing about meds for me it wasn’t the right fit but I know they can work for a lot of people... Mark only you know what is right for you. I love how open and honest you are 💕💕🦋🦋
I feel saddened that young people are having to wait far too long for mental health services. It’s a full time occupation for many to get through their days. Well done Mark for sharing. It’s helping enormously when you are articulately explaining with such honesty.
Feeling a bit depressive myself after watching this video... You're a great human being Mark, so well spoken about how you feel and what you're going through... Personally I think you are over analysing and over thinking. You're not a drinker you're not a smoker. Taking antidepressants can get you addictive too not in a good way. Doctors and pharmaceutical companies are making miliions every day on people with so called depression. We all have a struggles in life but is a pill really a permanent solution to it? What's the point of going from one addiction to another? The key is to be more kind to your own self and find natural ways of heeling such a CBD oil etc. Take a time somewhere during the week to actually do what's makes you and only you happy without feeling guilty. Maybe another trip to NYC with Nanny Di :-)??? Wish you all the best Mark ! Hope you will feel better soon.
Your back to life!!
Waking every morning with "this has b done, I've gotta go there. So & so needs to go, I've gotta do this, that" etc.
You're making an unruly diary in your head 24/7 again.
In Greece there was no work rush, must walk the dogs, do the garden etc. You let yourself live & go with the flow.
You need to clear a day a week, or 2 a month to be Mark. Do things for you. Go enjoy something totally mental. Even if it's a day bowling, swimming, bungee jumping or running around the park like a loon, not for exercising. Give yourself the fun days like u had in Greece.
I won't share my long and complicated life story but your mental health vlogs/updates are like sitting with a friend who makes one feel so not alone...I know your struggle. Wondering if there are some mental health support groups...separate from addiction focus...although we all know our struggles are intertwined and a big complicated ball of pure chaos...that you could attend. You find listening to others engage at your AA meetings helpful and come away with coping strategies or snippets of wisdom. We are fortunate to listen to you share...maybe you would find the same benefit if you could hear other's mental health struggles...like an AA meeting. It helps me...just a thought. PS...15 yrs is amazing.
Nice to see more men etc starting to open up and talk about this more ❤️
You're doing amazing. You 'beat yourself' up too much about things - which is your nature. You're a funny and loving man who overthinks!! Which is what we all seem to do nowadays! Sending lots of love and support. xxxxx
That's what we love about you, Mark; you're so open and honest. Not frightened to acknowledge and admit your faults and misgivings, i.e. you're showing you're human. Glad you took some time out to be kind to yourself and go to the AA meeting. Big hugs xx
You are so inspirational, I’m not in a good place at the moment suicidal thoughts are constant. I lost my dad in January around the time I first started watching your vlogs. They have helped me so much you and your family seem to lift me up, I seem to want to do more with my days if that makes sense? When I watch you so thankyou so much. Keep on keeping on x
Maaaark look at what went well. You went away & had a wonderful time ... we were born with everything we need. It's called self mastery & it's a work in progress. Spritualy,mentally, physically, emotionally & consciously. Sounds like you're doing good & yes our environment has an impact. Have you heard of the saying if you over analyse you paralyse. ; ) x
Thank you Mark for sharing, means a lot. One day at a time chuck. Take care. 🤗
Mark I admire you so much. Sending you the biggest bearest hug 🤗
So pleased the meeting was helpful to you, Mark - having somewhere outwith the family, just for you, sounds like a real positive. You express and articulate so well - it's incredibly informative. Thank you for sharing x
I really admire your honesty & openness. You are an amazing person Mark! Big hugs 🤗
Mark you're just so honest about how you feel. I really hope you find it helps talking to us. So many on here have been and still are in the same place as you and know what you're going through. Take care of yourself xx
Mark - thank you, for your honesty and your brilliant way of articulating your feelings, that so many of us struggle to do. Take my hat of to you. I recently tweeted 'forget Netflix, been home a few days and binge watched Nadia & family; what a lovely family' - agree with an earlier comment, there should be a hug button!
I enjoy all vlogs, videos etc., from your family, but the ones I take most from are your frank, self deprecating, articulate and serious monologues. Depression is such a battle as I know only too well, and so much time is taken up by it's power to rule you/us that sometimes it impedes us living life to the full. You're great just the way you are.😊
You are awesome Mark! You speak so eloquently. You are an inspiration. Thank you! Xxx
Mark really appreciate your honesty and sharing thoughts. All the issues you talk about with depression, anxiety, addiction etc will resonate in some way with most people, so hearing your experiences and how you are feeling really will help others, albeit know how much of a daily battle it is for you. I do think with how much pollution and just the general fast pace of life for those living in cities also affects us, so many toxins, over crowding and madness and the pressures your under with work and eking out a living is a huge burden of responsibility, it’s no wonder you feel as you do Mark. I think your an inspiration tbh, for those struggling to see however hard it is for you, you still win that daily battle. Good on you Mark 👍
Hi Mark, this was a brill video. When I started the same drug I was worse for three weeks and was worse and had hallucinations, after that it was like a switch. I was happier, better clearer version of me. I would try to stick it out and see how you go! Good luck and all my love
I have to watch these in small sections just because it is so close to how I feel the majority of the time minus the alcoholism (although my drinking before my child was on the unhealthy side). I now dont drink or anything else, i take meds for my fibromyalgia which decrease/increase my anxiety. You are so honest. I have just done a 20 min hiit and that was because of this video. Thanks for giving me a kick up the backside. Much love xx
Mark you know your own mind and body... I was on antidressants years ago and I lost all sense of living a full life while on them. I was numbed to feeling anything so I stuck at them and decided I wanted to try life without them and omg I would rather feel something than nothing.
The power of distraction is amazing, you looked relaxed on holiday Mark, you all did, the change of scene, the sunshine, the views, going at your own pace, being with your family, laughter, the freedom of doing whatever you want, no time constraints, happy and content, wishing it would go on and on. That’s what holidays do for us. Then we come home. To our own four walls and we remember how we felt before our holiday, how stressed and anxious we felt, and the same cycle starts all over again. The answer, keep doing holidays! ☀️😎
Loved watching this. It's amazing to watch your journey re sobriety. So glad you enjoyed the AA meeting.
ps I picked up after 13 years. The blind spots are cunning, baffling, powerful.
The very brave Daddy and his lady who keep going. X
Brilliant video Mark, thanks so much for being you and sharing stuff like this, really helps the rest of us 🤗👍❤️
I am in such awe concerning your honesty. Just a thought: I wonder what a therapist might say about you " forgetting" your meds? Would they posit the idea that you might have forgotten them on purpose? Whatever the case, I am happy you are making an effort to get a handle on this situation. The colloquy is brilliant...
Fantastic video and thank you. Your words of wisdom really do inspire me, take care
Thanks for being open and honest. My hubby is suffering from depression and now cognitive memory problems ..ive taken alot from this xx
Thank you Mark 💞, I know you prob don't feel it but you are so strong through your vulnerability, I wish you all thing good 💖💖💖
Hi Mark!
Interruption at 5.52:
I take Citalopram 40mg.
I find that my anxiety, and depression revolves around the insecurities in world that I live in!
When I went with my sons, 10 years ago, to visit their father and bloody amazing wife, on holiday, I didn't take my meds! (at that time 20mg)
Maybe on a 'high' from having no 'real life' anxieties, I didn't have any 'withdrawal symptoms'!
Back home, however, the 'shit hit the fan', and I had to get back on them!
Now, especially during fudging Brexit uncertainties, and the sad loss, last week, of my faithful Golden Retriever companion of the last 13 years, the 'shit has hit the fan' again😖😟
Thanks for this video mark I can so identify with lots you’ve said my husband is a alcoholic who is 24 years sober , he also takes sertraline for what I think was a mini breakdown and they have done wonders for him ,although he also hasn’t been attending regular meetings for the last six months and I can definitely see a change in his coping mechanisms and will show him this video tonight 👍🏻x
Mark you are amazing talking about this and you are helping people too
Sounds like the meeting was helpful for you. You can always start over again with the pills...and be patient and see how it works out for you. I've suffered from anxiety and depression for many years and have achieved a balance on an antidepressant. It just takes a while sometimes. You are doing great so be proud of yourself.
Do what you have to do to stay healthy, Mark! X
Sending you lots of hugs🤗🤗🤗 I hope Nadia is feeling better too 😘
My dad was in AA for nearly 30 years and still took it One day at a time keep up good work and stick to your meetings x💕💕
Well done Mark for acknowledging everything. Could being happy on holiday be that people think you need to be happy on holiday so you covered how you feel up. X
Thank you for your openness and honesty, your helping so many people xx
Not enough time to take them out of your system. However, you'll feel the change. Be careful, Mark. Don't come off so quickly. Thanks for sharing. Love you and your honesty!! You help me ... And I understand exactly what you are saying. ❤️
I wish...my brother had lived long enough to hear you. The beast as he called it...won in the end. I just wish I had one more minute with him to hold him and tell him how much he was loved...warts and all.
I suffer from depression and anxiety for many years. It’s a very confusing disease but it’s like having diabetes, but it’s in the brain. When it’s in the genes, it’s one thing and how we were raised is another thing. Be gentle with yourself and take it one day at a time. We are not perfect and this world provides anxiety in us all. Just know we don’t have all the answers and perhaps we never will- we will always learn and grow until our last breath.
That’s very brave if you to share this with us subs I admire you Mark bravo 👏🏼 I’m sure you will help a lot of people by sharing this , I’ve suffered depression most of my life and I still do I’m on antidepressants and probably will for a long long time , so your talk tonight made so much sense to me thank you ... ❤️
Well done Mark on 15 years sober. Wish I had your will power 🙏❤️
Applaud your honesty, congratulations on returning to AA meetings and persevering with antidepressants.hope your feel brighter soon. 💖
Deffo you need to think of the moment you are in never think of the past or the future just enjoy and cope with the moment you are in and feel everything around you, look at the faces of your kids and nads and really take it in. You are a work in progress like everyone is really. I am addicted to food and i think i always will be but its how we cope with it that is the keyxxx love you guys.
You are helping so many by talking about it.
We are all human we all do things and forget to take things.
When I was on Sertraline, it took about 2 to 3 weeks to start making me feel better. I think what should feel "normal" is different for each of us. It just takes time to adjust to what feels like our own normal. It's not a one size fits all, unfortunately. Just keep going each day, and eventually the twain shall meet. Being sober 15 years tells you you have the strength of mind to do it, one day at a time.
Im on citalpram... 30mg. Ive tried many times to come off... and even gone cold turkey. I kinda felt that when i was off them...just things came into my head too fast toi quick and i got very anxious loud couldnt see clearly..kind gobbley gook. And i just stopped talking... to family n friends. And everything and anything i cried at..but when i went back on it... i felt calmness clear headed didnt cry for no reason at all. Life was better again. So i now take my pills religiously.
I was also a drinker...violence was my best friend. Im also Kiribatian...pacific islanders can not take any form of alcohol...ive now been clean 2 yrs. However at funerals and weddings i drink bubbly with alot of lemonade. And only one glass... im addicted to coffee...lol lol. I do know exactly wot you are talking about Mark. Love and hugs to you and family xx
Mark you are an amazing human being!
Hi Mark!
Thank you so much for your vlog!
Your honesty about 'certain situations' has really helped me so much!
When one is at home, and depressed, one tends to 'encapsulate' oneself.
'Don't want to confront, and talk about a situation', for not wanting to be the 'poor old me, I can't cope' candidate!
All love and best wishes Claire Berlin
Thank you Mark for putting these how are you feeling videos on here, sadly there is no direct cure for depression, we can only manage it day to day. You are reminding anyone that suffers from depression or addiction that they are not alone and that there is help out there. We have to keep talking about mental health in this way.
We all fk up from time to time mark. we all only human after all. The main thing is, is that you get straight back on the path. Thanks for your honesty and for keeping it real xx
Honesty with yourself and the world is some of the best therapy you can get, its always difficult for us not suffering to fully understand BUT one observation I have is dont overthink things and the reason you probably didn't suffer when away was because you had many things to occupy your mind and seemed to spend some fantastic family time with people that matter and you care deeply about that my friend is what enriches the soul to its CORE!!!
Hi Mark, thank you for being honest & open. I'm on Sertraline, I hated taking them but I had a chat with my GP & said do you take them at night & I said no, so he said it would be a lot better for me to take them before bed & so I started taking them at night & noticed a huge difference & improvement. I've also in the past thought, I'm better plus these aren't doing anything, so I stopped taking them & after a few days bang anxiety hit me massively. Wishing you all the best 😊
Mark, I find you and Nadia incredibly inspirational. I have some questions about AA meetings that I would like to ask you. I’m terrified about what my future holds and know I have to do something about it..... I tried to do Nadia’s 100 days sober but just lied to myself....... I know I need help, but I do that typical thing of finding humour in a difficult situation. X
Your GP can fax your prescription through to your nearest pharmacy abroad, if in stock you can collect the same day. Thanks for the vlog & your honesty. Have loved the Greek holiday vlogs, so funny! X
You are so honest and articulate
Thanks for sharing Mark. This honesty will help so many other people. Me included. You’re living in the solution today 😊
Congratulations on your sobriety... One Day At A Time x
Mark the answers are never easy that is why living with poor mental health is f***ing hard. I hope you can take some comfort in the fact that besides all the support you have from family and friends we are also rooting for you. Thank you for all the work you put in to give us all hours and hours of endless entertainment. Thank you for your honesty, I am sure there are many many people who have been comforted by you and your story. You got this 💪🏼 x
Thankyou for sharing so honestly - you truly are so articulate I wish I could put my feelings into words as well as you 🙌
Different pill but for the same reasons as yourself ..physically and mentally I felt worse when I started taking them...give it 3 month..then decide. I’m 6 months in and I certainly don’t feel 100% but I feel better than I did and that’s good enough for me at the moment. Keep smiling x
Well done Mark, you never stop trying. I think it guarantees success. Aussie Bob
I hear you Mark. Thankyou for sharing. I'm a fair few years into taking antidepressants....went a while feeling a bit dead emotionally but now sort of normal, I have emotions but they don't get out of hand like before I took medication. Everyone's experiences are different I suppose but see if you can stick with them. They have saved me from myself.....I am a codependant with a touch of counter dependant.....fickle I say 😂 good on you for going to AA ✊
The antidepressants would have still been in your system when you were in Greece. Not sure how much half life they have.
Mark you certainly do feel worse for the first 2-4 weeks of taking Setraline but then slowly you start to feel better and by 6 weeks they do work.. stick with them now that your home and back to the normally daily stresses and anxiety. I too took citrapam first and definitely find the sertraline work better with less side effects xx
I think if you had depression,you would’ve had episodes of feeling depressed even on holiday. Might’ve been a good thing you forgot them, suppose you could give it a week or so and see how you feel before taking them. I remember years ago when I was a kid my mum took anti depressants for a short while and I had noticed that they kind of numbed her, took away sadness but also happiness. I don’t speak for every one of course as every individual is different.
Mark so glad you have done this for yourself today. Don't be embarrassed about forgetting your tablets on hols it's easy done. Take care of yourself.
If you don’t try you will never know, nothing to loose try and if they help carry on. If they don’t there are alternatives nothing is resolute. Your honesty is what will help you on your journey x
Just keep going Mark you have my admiration for dealing with your Mental health.
I am the same due to life events bad days will not turn better by taking pills. Just let them come and go and focus on good days.
Markkkk u left ur pills... saddle up and keep going... garden looks great in the background cant wait too see it in the autumn xx take care :)
Thinking of you mark your a great bloke 👍