Dementia & Reverse Parenting: It’s Like Being Trapped In A Mystery Movie 💜
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- Опубліковано 1 кві 2024
- Mama doesn’t listen and also doesn’t like to be told what to do. Her behavior takes an enormous amount of patience. I’ve asked the Psych doctor about a change in meds to make like more pleasant for us both.
Once she’s fixated on something, it’s hard to redirect. This is 10 minutes of a few hours. We tried everything. Some days, nothing works! This was one of those days.
This journey is a mixture of challenges requiring patience, love, and understanding.
✨Dark Clouds, Strong Hearts: A Family's Journey Through Storms. Uncover Their Story. To explore more, visit now tinyurl.com/5bfn2h37
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This video is about The Ups And Downs Of Dementia. But It also covers the following topics:
Creating Memories With Dementia
Dementia Care Challenges
Love And Dementia Care
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👉 Memories with Mama
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👉 Sassy
• 🤣 Classic Mama! #funny...
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👉 Mama STAYS on the move! 💜
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👉 💜Mama loves moving furniture, rearranging & "cleaning".
• Can Dementia Patients ...
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✅ About Divas and Dementia.
Welcome to "Divas and Dementia," a heartfelt journey shared by a daughter dedicated to her mom's care in the face of Dementia. My channel brings you into the daily life of love, laughter, and the realities of caring for a loved one in a memory care facility.
Through daily visits, I keep the spirit alive, ensuring that loneliness and forgetfulness are kept at bay. Dementia might challenge me, but it brings unexpected moments of joy, thanks to Mama's vibrant personality. Join me to normalize Dementia and spread awareness with a touch of love.
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⚠️Disclaimer: I do not accept any liability for any loss or damage incurred from you acting or not acting as a result of watching any of my publications. You acknowledge that you use the information I provide at your own risk. Do your research.
Copyright Notice: This video and my UA-cam channel contain dialogue, music, and images that are the property of Divas and Dementia. You are authorized to share the video link and channel and embed this video in your website or others as long as a link back to my UA-cam channel is provided.
© Divas and Dementia
Praying for you. I totally understand your situation my mom lives with me and she does things like this. A lot of people will give their opinion but this is truly trial and error. What works today might not work tomorrow. Hang in there and take a break when you can 💜
No lies detected. Dementia is not a once sized fits all illness. It's like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get. Each day, each hour, each minute and each second...DIFFERENT! I wish more people understood that. Most people give opinions that OVER SIMPLIFY this. IF ONLY IT WERE THAT EASY!!! Sending love to you and your mom on this journey.
I pray for you and your mom
🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Mama is a mess today. You are the most patient child ever❤ your home is absolutely beautiful ❤
Thank you!
She’s use to waking around her apartment building all day and so she keeps making laps at your house and she is DETERMINED to get upstairs!🤣🤣😫🙃
I know one thing mama Norma didn’t take any mess from anybody back in day. God see you not only what you do for your mother but the others at the facility. And seeing your acts of kindness let’s me know your like this with everyone in your life. God see knows your name 🙌🏾🙌🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Amennnnn
Crystal, you did everything you could to make Easter Day a happy family day for your Mom and family. Dementia is a horrible disease and I hope and pray that they will soon find a cure for it. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Sis, I’m a Social Worker, don’t hesitate to reach out if you want to revisit Mama’s care plan. As you know they have good days and bad days. Mama was just restless and knew she was in a different environment. She still stole my heart with her pretty self! Keep meeting her where she’s at. You’re doing an AWESOME job! 🙏🏽💙💛
Thanks but nah, it’s more to it than that. Her eating has changed, as well. She’s been exhibiting very different behaviors for the last 3 weeks. The care plan is changed. Psych meds are changed, as well.
U have patience of a saint sometimes I guess she’s a handful sending love and prayers your way hang in there !
Crystal next time bring her granddolls. “We really out here raising our parents and they bad AF!” 100% true. 😂
We asked before we left about bringing the lil boy. She said no, I'm not being bothered with no children today. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO Sometimes she will bring them and sometimes she won't.
@@divasanddementia4925 Ms. Norma wasn’t being bothered with the children 😂
Your intentions were good by taken her home to enjoy the family. But is hurtful watching them act out. 😢
Blessings to you and your family. I hope the rest of your Easter turned out Fabulous!
Prayers for you Ms Norma 🙏 ❤️ 💙 🥰
Ms. Norma was a handful. I thought I was going to see a boxing 🥊 match. You hang in there Crystal and remember to take time for yourself. Self care is important. Hats off to you and other caregivers. ❤
This one too!!
I can identify with this. Everyone is different but many actions and responses are the same. In all that you do please do not forget to take care of yourself. I pray for all caregivers as I also need prayer. Know that you are doing a great job and God got you in every challenging moment, thought, action,smile and happy times. 🙏🏾😇💖
Sending you love and prayer!
I sooo understood that “Oh my God”. I take care of my dad with dementia and when you said that, I felt like I was saying it myself without even opening my mouth… it’s just so familiar 😅
Because sometimes it's like you're in the twilight zone. It is so unreal. lol
@@divasanddementia4925 I agree 💯
Every time Mama Norma says "huh?" I am convinced she heard you good and well, but just didn't like what you were saying....my mom used to call it "selective hearing"😆
She absolutely hears me. LOL
Hang in there sugar! That was truly a lot!!! I wish I was closer. 😢
You are so sweet!
@divasanddementia4925 Thank you. I see the struggle and the struggle is real! I have been keeping you and Ms. Norma in my prayers. My grandmother lived with us during Alzheimers. I got hit by her many times. She could be funny and so fun, at times, yet as soon as the sun would start to go down, she would totally change. I am sorry you are watching someone that you love so much, turn into someone that you no longer even know and they no longer even know you. Big hugs! God Bless!
I pray for all those kids who are now taking care of their parents. Roles are now reversed. At least mama don't know no better. She don't even know how much she stresses you out. God bless her. Hang in there Crystal, you are doing your best. 😇
So sorry Crystal that you have to endure this behavior when you try sooo hard to make sure Ms. Norma is good on a regular basis. Its sort of like funny, not funny. I'm sad for you in these situations, but you always seem to give us a little chuckle... love the ending.
Continued prayers for you girly! 🙏🏽 And yes, I do feel your pain.
You tried your hardest and that’s what counts
You are the true embodiment of love from a daughter to a mother. That’s the only thing that keeps you going❤
Bless her heart, she seems to have nervous energy. I know that you have tried everything to keep her occupied, but she doesn’t understand it. Bless you and your husband Crystal I salute you both. 🙏🏾✝️✝️✝️🙏🏾
She loves to walk. Beautiful home😊
thank you!
You tried.......that is most important part......YOU WERE ONCE HER LITTLE ONE AND NOW SHE IS YOUR LITTLE ONE......GOD IS GOOD....
The circle of life
Mama cut a rug... I knew she was gone challenge not being able to go upstairs with her cute self. I wll watch it bout 5 more time lol I also don't mean to make light of your feelings, you are doing an awesome job ! May God continually bless you for your assignment
We can laugh together. It's totally fine. I have accepting this with grace and humor with a rare sprinkle of tears. LOL
@@divasanddementia4925 May the Love of God envelope you and reward you in heaven and on earth!
Oh my that Look she gave you.
Mama ready to go home and walk that hallway. 😊
It’s ok to take her back home, she’s too busy hun and it doesn’t mean u love her any less. I work with ppl like ur mom everyday & my granny went thru the same thing. For ur safety take her home God knows ur heart and that’s all that matters🙏🙏🙏
Baby the jacked back I'm sorry Hun but she had me rolling
You’re such an angel. I have been following you on TikTok. I can only pray that my only child will be as patient with me when I get older. Keep doing what you’re doing! You will continue to be blessed. 🙏🏽
I cried too one day; and then bought paint. I never could remove all the chewing gum from the Harwood floors. I just had them put polyurethane on them. I totally get it. ❤❤❤
oh emmm geeeee
Greetings👑 Bless your ❤🫂 Mama was really being a handful. I'm glad that you had your husband there with you to help🙏🏾
Momma really getting her excise on but she determined to get up those stairs bless her heart
I definitely understand. I take care of my grandmother and she loves to say no. And in the middle of the night she is tearing up her room.
Your redirection game is good ms norma is determined and the only thing you can do is let her do things as long as it don't harm her i would tell patients i was pregnant so they wouldn't hit me it worked 😂😂😂
This comment
Nah, she can't always do what she wants. Especially up and down my steps. She's a fall risk. So, once she falls and breaks a hip, then what? Downhill from there. And she don't give a damn about pregnant. I be fake crying all the time, She doesn't give a damn.
@@divasanddementia4925 ms Norma on another level and most def don't want broken bones or hips you are still doing a great job IMO because it can be frustrating with a loved one that is strong willed I salute you and your family its not for the weak 💖💖💖💖🙏🙏🙏🙏
Watching this brought my mind back to one of the rough days with my Mama. She passed away 9/10/2010 at 11:10pm. She had early onset Alzheimer’s. I was her main caregiver because my brother or sister couldn’t do it. I miss her every day more than words can say. I know she’s with The Lord and one day I’ll see her whole and healed. You’re doing an awesome job with your Mom. May God bless you and ur family Krystal. 🙏 #EndAlzheimers
So sorry for your loss.
Ms. Norma had me jumping back from the screen when she snatches back with her fist balled up.... Happy Resurrection Sunday Crystal & Family
I know it very challenging and heartbreaking you’re strong 💪🏽 it’s very hard it can break you but god knows your pain and frustration just hang on in there you got this ♥️😘hugs xoxoxo
The love you have for mama, May God bless you and renew your strength.You are doing good.
Lost my mother in November of 22, 98 years old, lived in her own apartment, and was able to take care of herself. Grateful to God for the time she was with us.
My mother lives with me and I have absolutely No help! I am mentally and physically exhausted!!
She said, "Are you paying for it? 😂😂😂😂I CAAAAANT WITH MAMMA. You are doing a great job. Do your sister spend time with her? Do you ever show her old pictures of the good days? She was being sassy today..you are going to get a poppin...she said I'm going upstairs...❤❤❤❤I wish they had a cure. Bless you and your family. I know this has to be hard for you.
I been working with Dementia for years,,it's a beast
A beast! But my MIL was not like this at all. She was so pleasant and peaceful.
Your mom is one pretty woman...I love her hair cut and y'all keep her dressed so nice. You may need to put a baby gate up in front of the stairs so she will stop trying to go upstairs. You are a wonderful daughter...God Bless you and your mom.
I'll cry with you, Crystal. I am caring for my father, who has Dementia. I care for him in his apartment and stay 24/7. I have had no time whatsoever to myself for the past 3 years. I am mentally and physically drained, to the point of now considering a memory care facility. He called me a b.... the other day, and I know this will become worse as the disease progresses.
I took care of my Mom for almost 6 years in our home. You might want to ask his Dr if he'd qualify for some Hospice service's? They usually have a respite care where it can give you a break for several days?
Yeah, I couldn't handle my mom at home. She was too combative and called me every name in the book. All memory care facilities are not bad! I did not place my mom there. She was so out of control, they said she was a danger to herself and others. I'm so glad the social worker placed her. At least I can breathe now. At first, I was having regular panic attacks. Sometimes help is a must. My mom is actually doing so much better in that environment! She has freedom. I love that for her.
@divasanddementia4925 She sure has a lot of energy. I hope her Dr can maybe switch her meds around to calm her a little. I don't suppose she would like to do adult coloring, puzzles, or similar things? I feel your struggle when she doesn't listen or gets a bit combative. It's exhausting! Make sure you take care of yourself along the way. You do a great job!
You're doing a phenomenal job. My patience is thin😢.
BLESS YOUR HEART BABY DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP YOU ARE DOING YOUR BEST AND THATS TAKING DAMN GOOD CARE OF HER! ITS HARD BEING A CARE GIVER BUT HOLD YOU HEAD HIGH BABY PUT YOUR SHOULDERS BACK AND DO THE TASK GOD HAS LAID BEFOR YOU YOU ARE BLESSED AND HIGHLY FAVORED! I'VE BEEN WHERE YOU ARE NOW I WILL CONTINUE TO PRAY FOR YOU AND MAMA AND WILLIAM GODS GOT YOU! LOVE YOU❤❤❤❤
Ms. Norma ain't did a thang wrong! Lol! She just out here living her life. God bless her. I love watching her. You're doing an amazing job with your mom.
Keep your head up Crystal. You're such a phenomenal daughter and I'm sure you get mentally, emotionally, and physically tired.
Crystal you are doing a fantastic job with your Mom. Ms. Norma is so blessed to have a sweet daughter like you. I Love watching your videos. I had to laugh when she told you No. hang in there sweetheart. 🙏🏽❤️🙏🏽
You are an amazing daughter that any parent would love to have, you’re doing such an awesome job! I watch you all the time on TikTok and I’m just now finding your UA-cam. I really hope that God gives you a little bit of comfort in such trying times, God bless you, your mother and your family. 🫶🏽🙏🏾💕
Thank you so much!!
Crystal, my prayers go out to you sis. Ms Norma and my mother are one of s kind, but your mother is much more sturdy on her feet. When they get in what i call "busy body mode" you csn hang it up if you think you're going to get anything done. We're definitely having to raise them in this second childhood. You're doing an amazing job, and your level of patience is in a class by itself, be Blessed.
I love how you are so calm with momma❤
💜💜💜YOU’RE DOING A AWESOME JOB SIS! God bless y’all!
You are really patient crystal I watch y’all everyday I go from when you started everyday my mom is starting to get forgetful I watch y’all and learn because my mother is my rock!!
I am PRAYING FOR YOU!!! This reminds me of the 5 years we cared for my mother-in-law who had severe Alzheimer's and later passed on hospice. We chose to care for her at home, but thank God we had a good care plan.
Crystal. I truly understand I am dealing with the same thing going through the same . Praying that God continues to give us strength and patience. Thanks for sharing. They are so fiesty at times.
I totally understand this whole experience
Praying for you your mom and family 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
I have a similar journey with my Dad, it’s hard AF. I have no life, no support and no direction. I’m totally overwhelmed and lost.
No mama , he needs to be in a home
I understand that you want to keep your dad home but maybe it’s best he goes into a home suitable for his needs. It’s way too much for one person. I did it with my nana but I also had help. Eventually we were able to get her 24/7 home caregivers so she didn’t have to leave her home. You can’t pour from an empty cup.
I truly understand I took care of my father for many years and it’s exhausting he finally passed in 2020 (kind of a relief). Caring for him left me depressed and anxious you never know what to expect from day to day. Everything was on me no help. I took him to work with me and my clients were so nice to try to help me out. I know the journey you are on will definitely keep you in prayer.
Hang in There Crystal I know it's not easy But Hang There Young . You Are Doing All Can Do Hold On 💞💞💯
I feel everything your going through my Sister as our Mom too has dementia... Its the most heartbreaking thing I have ever had to go through or will ever go through I believe... Praying for you all!
May God bless and keep you …🙏🏾
The joy of the Lord is our strength. Rejoice in God through it all. This hurts the heart. God knows your pain & cares for you. ❤
Amennnnnnn
She's beautiful. I love your hair❤ You're so good with her❤
❤❤❤ you do an awesome job with your mother
Moma Norma said well are you paying for it?!? 😂😂😂 you are a gift from heaven
Right! Yes I am paying for it. LOL
You are doing a miraculous job with your mom it is a big job trying to deal with somebody with dementia it's like having a baby all over again my prayers and my heart goes out to you Crystal because it takes enormous amount of patience to deal with someone with dementia God bless you and Mama Norma and please please pray Crystal you have to pray and I'll be praying for you guys too.God bless y'all and the family 🙏🏾🙏🏾❤️❤️
Crystal continues to count the small blessings. I'm thankful that you have a supportive husband and family. Like you said, the roles have reversed and our parents have some serious issues. It takes a village, a good facility an prayer. Remember to take time out for yourself; cry, screen, whatever you need to do to release those emotions. But remember that's not her it's the disease. She's still there and she's frustrated that she can't communicate.💜
Yes they will wander get agitated it's hard work my ❤️ goes out to you I am retired nurse I know how you feel god prayers to you 🙏 ❤️ 😊
Sweet Crystal I’m sending you and your dear Mom big hugs💞.
Received! Thank you!
My mom lives with me also. With Dementia. It's a full time job to care for them. She very calm though around the house. Mom is 83 years old
It’s like she never get tired of walking
It's unreal.
Bless your heart ❤. You do an Amazing job with your Mom. Your family is in my prayers ❤🙏🏾
Thanks for sharing !! God Bless u & your FAMILY
She’s beautiful and your doing a great job my uncle has dementia I’m 24 and a Cna myself hopefully I will become a lpn one day and he is 75 he basically raised me bc my dad wasn’t there and now I’m raising him I refuse to put him in a nursing home keep up the good work ik how hard it can be girl
You do really good with Monma. I pray god continue to give you guidance and strength 🙏🏾
Hey Crystal. You are doing great. Just hang in there. I've worked in with dementia clients and with family members. Take a break when you need to. Get a village going, it's always helpful. Praying 🙏 for you and your household. 😊
You are doing a great job with your moommy. God bless you for doing all that you do. It's not easy, but you're trying hard
When do Ms Norma know when she is tired? You are in my prayers. You are doing a fantastic job with your mother. I will pray for your strength cause I can see that is a hard job mentally and physically. May god continue to be with you and Ms Norma🙏🏽🙏🏽. If they give her medication to come her down a little ,do it make her drowsy?
None has made her drowsy thus far. We shall see what these new meds do.
I know how hard it is to care for a family member with disability I take care of my two brothers and I have to repeat myself over and over and over. Take a deep breath and a lot of prayers.
i'm going through most of this by myself right now,my mother have 5 kids left,and i'm the only one doing stuff
Norma got a big ol attitude!....😅😅😅🤣🤣🤣
facts!
Continued prayers for you all🙏🏽💞
I've worked a lot with this disease... If you give her dolls or puzzles or a purse with some $1 bills in it or engage her in folding laundry downstairs from only a basket she should be less unsettled.... Basically give her distraction
If you’ve worked a lot with this disease, then you should know that not all persons living with Dementia engage in these activities! I’ve spent a fortune on all kinds of things to keep her busy. She is absolutely not interested. It has to do with what stage of Dementia they are in and more importantly what they did and how they were BEFORW the illness. My mom mostly just likes to cuddle with her dolls at bedtime. She WILL NOT fold. She did that early in her Dementia, NOT NOW. And she puts any paper such as bills down her bra. So thanks, but at the stage she’s in, those solutions don’t work AT ALL. She was diagnosed in 2017. As the years go by, we’ve tried it all. There are several videos on our TikTok with dolls, puzzle attempts, fidget toy attempts, clothes folding attempts, Bingo attempts, hula hoop, coloring, counting straws and more.
I know you have tried any and everything in the book and so on at this stage nothing working sometimes they fight and that not funny at all heart breaking. Only thing I decided to do with my dad was to ask for something that will come home down a bit they gave him some meds and it help out I would give them to him every time I would see him getting hyper but not everyday bc I didn't want him sleep all the time.
Baby she would NEVA leave the nursing home I’m sorry😩🤣
Awwww Happy belated Easter sweetie and ur family ❤
HELLO FAMILY 😊😊😊 I REALLY ADMIRE YOUR ENDURANCE MY SISTER 💯 PERCENT YES IT IS A VERY ENDURING JOB MY FATHER ALWAYS SAID ONCE AN ADULT TWICE A CHILD AND I UNDERSTAND EXACTLY WHAT HE MEANS 👍👍👍 WHEN WE SEE OUR LOVED ONES GOING THROUGH SICKNESS THAT'S NOT MANAGBLE IT REALLY HURTS US😢😢😢 BECAUSE WE WANT THEM TO BE BETTER AND THAT IS PROGRESS AND NOT REGRESS 👌👌👌 YES IT COULD BE THE MEDICATIONS THAT MAKES HER AGITATED AND ALOT IF TIMES THEY ARE AGITATED BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH THEY KNOW THEY ARE NOT THEMSELVES THEY ARE FIGHTING IT AND I KNOW THAT WAS YOUR LAST RESORT TO PLACE MOMS IN A CARE FACILITY AND IT HURT YOU😢😢😢 THE ONLY THING WE CAN DO IS OUR BEST AND NOTHING LEST 💯 PERCENT AND YOU ARE DOING AN EXCELLENT JOB 💯 PERCENT CORRECT AND PURE LOVE ALWAYS 💝💝💝
It’s like a child. You have to watch every minute. Such patience.
Look stop putting it like that this is part of having dementia this mother don't want to have dementia,it's your tone in your comment that pisses me of
@@JohnsonAnn65 No! It’s a fact. And everyone knows old age is a form of regression back to childhood.
One thing about Ms Norma. She’s gonna walk.
Also put obstruction on the stairs like a baby gate or have items sitting on stairs.... She'll be less likely to try to go up stairs if they're not empty and easily accessible to walk up
Bless ur ❤!! She was so Busy today!!
You have a beautiful home and your patience is beautiful also ❤️
It's rough and you do such a great job. I hope a new care plan helps!
Praying it does!!!
I had to get my sister's residence to do a new care plan. I had to go to the VP of Health, an RN in an executive position. They got in an external RN very quickly once I explained the probems we were having. I don't understand if the new plan is working though! It's baby steps to improvements. Adjustments need time but it had been taking months. That's a lot.
@@divasanddementia4925
Beautiful lady and 🙏🙏🙏 to you and yours.
Ms Norma was about to backhand somebody about letting her up them stairs!! 😂😂😂
Lord bless! I’ll definitely be praying for her.
You can tell that the Mother was Beautiful and Fine when she was young!!😊
Good bless you and your family!!
Same to you!
Oh Crystal bless you honey ❤maybe bringing the family to her in her environment she may settle some.i love to see Ms Norma she was in full blown exploration mode.
I have to balance being a daughter, wife, mom, step-mom, step grandmom....I'm not asking anyone to spend their holiday in a facility. That's a lot to ask. My husband sacrifices ENOUGH. So, I do my best. If it doesn't work, she goes back.
Hey Crystal had to watch this serval times ..never seen Ms.Norma act this ..and why was she so determine to get up stairs❤❤❤❤😅😅😅😅
She wants to get up there so bad because we said NO.
You have a beautiful home.. God continue to bless you and your family.
Hello from STL.!! YOUR HOME is So Beautiful! That silver very large mirror is way cool. Boy you sure do have patience . It's harder when it's your own people especially your mom. Bless you . Oh no she she gona hit you?
Oh she hits. lol
Yikes
It’s sad you can’t enjoy your time with her when she’s at your home! She definitely has some nervous energy going! I’d like to have half that! 🤦♀️🤣
Such a beautiful daughter, just wondering if you are an only child any siblings to help with mom 🙏💐
I am the youngest of 4.
I just love her. She said NOO😂