Hi guys!! Just wanted to share info. about my upcoming life coaching certification course. Some people plan to become life coaches - others 'fall into it'. I think when a person has gone through something so life altering, something that pushed them outside the realms of their authentic self, something that so profoundly changed not only their self perception, but altered their nervous system, dis-regulated their brain and warped their reality..... and yet when they manage to reconnect with self, and heal the deep emotional wounds that are hidden to the naked eye and misunderstood by those that have never been through an experience like that - well, it's only natural to feel a deep desire to want to help others that have been through that. That's how I 'fell into coaching' and it's been an amazing experience to help individuals all over the world to break through the side effects of cptsd and/or side effects of narcissistic abuse. If YOU are interested in becoming a life coach - be sure to check out my website: micheleleenieves.com/narcissistic-abuse-recovery-coaching-certification/
They see you in such a distorted way. They see you as a negative extension of them, where they project their negative traits, faults, mistakes, flaws, imperfections and insecurities on to you.
Narc has pyschopathic traits and fears people see it in them, so says you are insane. Narc gains ten pounds, says you are fat. Narc is disloyal, says you are disloyal. Narc is lazy....
Lool i knew one like this in real life, man was he good!! He had a very VERY squeaky clean reputation. Was a known youth worker, who helped his ill mum and volunteered at charity events. Beneath all that though, he was a predator. A side which only I was unfortunate enough to witness 🥴 Its very difficult to call these people out or expose them bc 9/10 nobody will believe you. There was a diff video of Dr Ramani in which she said you shouldn't call narcs narcs because they dont see themselves that way - they are incapable of it - so what they will do is project it back onto you. A potentially dangerous situation to be in imo. Best thing to do is go no contact and steer clear of these people
Honestly, these kinds of people are more common than I first thought years ago when I got into this. They deny or blame one moment that the "Narc" did something and use that incident to justify all blame on the narc. The attitude seems to be if I have felt sorry, then it's your turn but I think it's a the age old narc trick. I just did IT, so now it's YOUR turn. But they gaslight you into taking a turn to be sorry yet a few days later you come out of the cognitive dissonance and remember that they never did say sorry , just said it was YOUR TURN next?!
There is now a person in my life that will call me out when I start doing the negative stuff about myself. He calls me out every time. I'm trying to change the way I think, but sometimes i need a little kick in the butt❤
Whenever the words "negative" and "negativity" come up in conversation, I end it right there, and I remove myself from their presence, never to offend them again. And I spend time to recover myself.
Thats very good 🎉I do it also, whenever it’s possible. It’s the best solution. Than the poison is even working after the contact and you can come to ruminate again about the insults, wether they are overt or covert done from the Narc.
@@coop-jt7bd exactly! I must be clear of my own sick and secret attachments to the narcissist. Letting go is best and "the art of letting go" plays a huge role. The narcissist is attached to me, unwilling to let go. My role is to remain detached and always be willing and ready to let go at any given moment anywhere. I have to work at it diligently with a firm commitment in place to get through it. It's beautiful how the waters can wear away rocks in it's flowing path, keep flowing!😁💗
Forgiveness Yes, so it is. Unwillingly you give your power away on a subconscious level😶And it’s a Hard work to get it back on yourself, sometimes. Besides you think that is a normal person and the one that you have known at the first time. But it is not - it is just a narc.
lol you both are feeding off each other, but i guess in a positive. I definitely can relate to those. I have disconnected from very few. Maybe 10 intentionally to never speak to again, I use social media very little more now since the covid. usually just to say hello now and again and happy birthdays. I guess that could be considered narc behavior? I think this last one will be on the can't talk to because i hurt so much. I know i hurt them.
You've explained how and why self-sabotage actually works so well.... I feel like this will help me break free from it. Extremely grateful for this free help and it won't be forgotten. Probably your most helpful video!
What is more "confusing" i when you didn't had self love for your self ever, and relationship with NPD person forced you to had self love during healing after relationship. When finally you focused on your self and move those emotion and feeling forward. First time in my life I did it about 2 weeks before discard, when I had enough and started defend my self, which I never did in my life. (earlier I just kept those thoughts and feelings inside, and tried to very gently point it out if all) it was like poking a bear. She thought I'm naive and stupid. And that is the reason of discard I think. She lose control over me. Being assertive to people close to you is very different than being assertive in life.
This is so helpful! Thank you! Evidence of self love for me today was taking the time to watch this video and really listen to your words. Brain training! Xoxox thanks so much!
Something with i definitely am helping my subconcious mind with is understanding my tiredness... My lack of desire to even wake up... And seeing that narcs program you to feel this way, and eventually overcome it is for me a huge step, as opposed to the believe that you are just lazy or all these harsh things we learn from toxic people and we apply to ourselves
Thank you Michele for your wisdom and advice. Everything you say is so wise and helpful to anyone who has suffered under the control of a narcissist. You are a beautiful soul!
I love these tips! You have a real gift in offering practical, but unique, strategies that seriously can help anyone who implements them. It's so frustrating to be going along and doing well, then suddenly stall in whatever I'm trying to accomplish; especially, when I'm right on the brink of succeeding at something important. I'm starting right now to put those tips into practice. I know it will help! Thank you, Michele! Sending big hugs! 💖💖💖
Dear Michelle - thank you for such a deep explanation on why its difficult to implement changes in ourselves - I smiled when you said that you cant give us a pill and this does require hard work - because the whole video and your voice felt like a medicine soothing the heart to me - thank you x
One thing that narcissists do is remove your reference point. They take that away and make you seem crazy. But in reality we don’t know where to compare ourselves to when it comes to good standards.
This is so helpful. It is so hard to reprogram but definitely possible. It helps to know if hat someone out there understands what you’ve been through.
1.Self confidence 2.Self Love 3.Courage 4.Calm mind 5.Nerve like a steel 6.Full of strength 7.Purity of mind 8.I am a child of God 9.I am divine 10.I am awareness 11.I am consciousness 12.I am kind 13.I am Immortal 14.I am the creator of my own destiny 15.I am invincible 16.I am one with God 17.God is with me 18.I love myself 19.Everybody loves me 20.I love everyone 21.I radiate love 22.I radiate peace around the whole world. 23.I am one with the universe. 24.I am infinite This is my true nature.
Well... well... well... Thank you- guess I still don’t like myself and view self love (at least my own self love) as selfish, even though I know it’s not. Even though I know that in order to take care of others we still have to take care of ourself.
Yes yes yes. Why are we helping so and so... why are we adding to our drama... we haven't even recovered from last time. We can only help others after we take care of ourselves.
Thanks Michele with 1 L. I'll try it! Much more realistic than jumping right into deep meditation. Success by the inch is a cinch- by the yard, it's hard. My mind is so hyperactive, mindfulness is a thousand miles way. However, this, is realistic. Gotta work on the solution. I'm stuck & have been for a while.
I honestly don't know if I'm a good person or not. I have both good and evil in me due to how i was raised. I want to be a good loving person but i know my mom's narcissistic traits rubbed off on me and I can become very cold and uncaring if I feel annoyed.
Hi guys!! Just wanted to share info. about my upcoming life coaching certification course. Some people plan to become life coaches - others 'fall into it'. I think when a person has gone through something so life altering, something that pushed them outside the realms of their authentic self, something that so profoundly changed not only their self perception, but altered their nervous system, dis-regulated their brain and warped their reality..... and yet when they manage to reconnect with self, and heal the deep emotional wounds that are hidden to the naked eye and misunderstood by those that have never been through an experience like that - well, it's only natural to feel a deep desire to want to help others that have been through that. That's how I 'fell into coaching' and it's been an amazing experience to help individuals all over the world to break through the side effects of cptsd and/or side effects of narcissistic abuse. If YOU are interested in becoming a life coach - be sure to check out my website: micheleleenieves.com/narcissistic-abuse-recovery-coaching-certification/
They see you in such a distorted way. They see you as a negative extension of them, where they project their negative traits, faults, mistakes, flaws, imperfections and insecurities on to you.
Narc has pyschopathic traits and fears people see it in them, so says you are insane. Narc gains ten pounds, says you are fat. Narc is disloyal, says you are disloyal. Narc is lazy....
I love your channel narc survivor
All the while stealing and adopting your positive traits and personality. Then abandon you to deal with everything that they did to you.
I love both your and Michelle's work. Thank you for your work.
@@natashastewart8203 and it was all because of us. Painted black and discarded.
Thankfully I found you and you have helped me more than you can imagine your Awesome Heaven Sent, Rick
She helped me. Even though I was strong. God bless brutha.
Add me to the list of people she's helped. This woman is the real deal.
Same
It's not just you, the narc sees everyone with their distorted lens. Imagine going through life seeing people in a completely distorted way.
Error is impersonal meaning they do it to everyone!
Please could you do a video on narcissists who claim THEY are empaths. But also those who believe others are narcissists and not themselves.
Lool i knew one like this in real life, man was he good!! He had a very VERY squeaky clean reputation. Was a known youth worker, who helped his ill mum and volunteered at charity events. Beneath all that though, he was a predator. A side which only I was unfortunate enough to witness 🥴
Its very difficult to call these people out or expose them bc 9/10 nobody will believe you.
There was a diff video of Dr Ramani in which she said you shouldn't call narcs narcs because they dont see themselves that way - they are incapable of it - so what they will do is project it back onto you. A potentially dangerous situation to be in imo.
Best thing to do is go no contact and steer clear of these people
Honestly, these kinds of people are more common than I first thought years ago when I got into this. They deny or blame one moment that the "Narc" did something and use that incident to justify all blame on the narc.
The attitude seems to be if I have felt sorry, then it's your turn but I think it's a the age old narc trick. I just did IT, so now it's YOUR turn. But they gaslight you into taking a turn to be sorry yet a few days later you come out of the cognitive dissonance and remember that they never did say sorry , just said it was YOUR TURN next?!
That would be a good video - I know some people who think they're such saints but in reality will screw anyone over given the chance
Andy Moar yeah plus we got to remember that narcs can often get together so I guess it is possible they were both narcs as well!
drppr 76 yep I know a few too!
There is now a person in my life that will call me out when I start doing the negative stuff about myself. He calls me out every time. I'm trying to change the way I think, but sometimes i need a little kick in the butt❤
Yay, just little pushes i tried. I knew i can't do the work for them. I have to take care of myself too.
Whenever the words "negative" and "negativity" come up in conversation, I end it right there, and I remove myself from their presence, never to offend them again. And I spend time to recover myself.
Thats very good 🎉I do it also, whenever it’s possible. It’s the best solution. Than the poison is even working after the contact and you can come to ruminate again about the insults, wether they are overt or covert done from the Narc.
@@coop-jt7bd exactly! I must be clear of my own sick and secret attachments to the narcissist. Letting go is best and "the art of letting go" plays a huge role. The narcissist is attached to me, unwilling to let go. My role is to remain detached and always be willing and ready to let go at any given moment anywhere. I have to work at it diligently with a firm commitment in place to get through it.
It's beautiful how the waters can wear away rocks in it's flowing path, keep flowing!😁💗
Forgiveness
Yes, so it is. Unwillingly you give your power away on a subconscious level😶And it’s a Hard work to get it back on yourself, sometimes.
Besides you think that is a normal person and the one that you have known at the first time. But it is not - it is just a narc.
lol you both are feeding off each other, but i guess in a positive. I definitely can relate to those. I have disconnected from very few. Maybe 10 intentionally to never speak to again, I use social media very little more now since the covid. usually just to say hello now and again and happy birthdays. I guess that could be considered narc behavior? I think this last one will be on the can't talk to because i hurt so much. I know i hurt them.
You've explained how and why self-sabotage actually works so well.... I feel like this will help me break free from it.
Extremely grateful for this free help and it won't be forgotten. Probably your most helpful video!
I'm so glad my videos are helping you!!!! It's comments like this that provide me more motivation to produce these videos. Thank you =)
You're welcome, Michele =)
Michelle,
Awesome information...I had to watch it a second time & took notes to really hear what you are teaching....Thank you!!!
What is more "confusing" i when you didn't had self love for your self ever, and relationship with NPD person forced you to had self love during healing after relationship. When finally you focused on your self and move those emotion and feeling forward. First time in my life I did it about 2 weeks before discard, when I had enough and started defend my self, which I never did in my life. (earlier I just kept those thoughts and feelings inside, and tried to very gently point it out if all) it was like poking a bear. She thought I'm naive and stupid. And that is the reason of discard I think. She lose control over me.
Being assertive to people close to you is very different than being assertive in life.
When they don t get their agenda with you, you are not interesting, or too difficult and they discard you
This made my day better after completing the exercise. Thank you!
Thanks, Michele! Spot on as usual. 👍💞🌷🌷💖
This is so helpful! Thank you! Evidence of self love for me today was taking the time to watch this video and really listen to your words. Brain training! Xoxox thanks so much!
What a fantastic topic you've brought up! You REALLY have a great take insight into these ideas!!
Something with i definitely am helping my subconcious mind with is understanding my tiredness... My lack of desire to even wake up... And seeing that narcs program you to feel this way, and eventually overcome it is for me a huge step, as opposed to the believe that you are just lazy or all these harsh things we learn from toxic people and we apply to ourselves
Thank you Michele for your wisdom and advice. Everything you say is so wise and helpful to anyone who has suffered under the control of a narcissist. You are a beautiful soul!
I love these tips! You have a real gift in offering practical, but unique, strategies that seriously can help anyone who implements them. It's so frustrating to be going along and doing well, then suddenly stall in whatever I'm trying to accomplish; especially, when I'm right on the brink of succeeding at something important. I'm starting right now to put those tips into practice. I know it will help! Thank you, Michele! Sending big hugs! 💖💖💖
Love yourself ... well said. Change begins from inside. Thanks
U are awesome, Michele 🙏❤️
Dear Michelle - thank you for such a deep explanation on why its difficult to implement changes in ourselves - I smiled when you said that you cant give us a pill and this does require hard work - because the whole video and your voice felt like a medicine soothing the heart to me - thank you x
One thing that narcissists do is remove your reference point. They take that away and make you seem crazy. But in reality we don’t know where to compare ourselves to when it comes to good standards.
Thank you Michele
It is O.K. we will climb up the latter, thanks to you I believe it can happen. Slowly I am finding my true self. MERCI!
Thank you Michele! Brilliant and beautiful as always....
THANK YOU FOR LOVELY VIDEO
This is so helpful. It is so hard to reprogram but definitely possible. It helps to know if hat someone out there understands what you’ve been through.
Love your content Michele! Thank you!!
Best chanel about narzissist
Hello Michelle...first you are looking great ...thank you for your video I agree with everything you say...🌺💙🌺
1.Self confidence
2.Self Love
3.Courage
4.Calm mind
5.Nerve like a steel
6.Full of strength
7.Purity of mind
8.I am a child of God
9.I am divine
10.I am awareness
11.I am consciousness
12.I am kind
13.I am Immortal
14.I am the creator of my own destiny
15.I am invincible
16.I am one with God
17.God is with me
18.I love myself
19.Everybody loves me
20.I love everyone
21.I radiate love
22.I radiate peace around the whole world.
23.I am one with the universe.
24.I am infinite
This is my true nature.
Well... well... well... Thank you- guess I still don’t like myself and view self love (at least my own self love) as selfish, even though I know it’s not. Even though I know that in order to take care of others we still have to take care of ourself.
Yes yes yes. Why are we helping so and so... why are we adding to our drama... we haven't even recovered from last time. We can only help others after we take care of ourselves.
This is an awesome video of ideas!!
Thanks Michele with 1 L. I'll try it! Much more realistic than jumping right into deep meditation. Success by the inch is a cinch- by the yard, it's hard. My mind is so hyperactive, mindfulness is a thousand miles way. However, this, is realistic. Gotta work on the solution. I'm stuck & have been for a while.
Thank you so much. Your advices are gems.. 💎💙
Very true Michele!
Their critique of you should ALWAYS BE DISCARDED. Never acknowledge the opinions of a Toxic Person.
So in other words . . . I know you are but what am I? Oh wow, who would've thought that grade school saying could apply as an adult 🙆♂️
YellowPaint100 Yup they just project
great video love the pill
Thank You 🌹🌹🌹🙏🙏💞💞💞
Wow. Sooo Helpfull. Dang...
So charge for 1 to 1 as I'm broke finicialy mentally spirtualy etc thank you for helping me to understand I'm not the problem. 😅😅😅😅😅😅
Sorry Michele. Smashed my phone, but I'm back on track!! Love u!!! 😘😘😘 Love, Raz @}~~~}~~
I honestly don't know if I'm a good person or not. I have both good and evil in me due to how i was raised. I want to be a good loving person but i know my mom's narcissistic traits rubbed off on me and I can become very cold and uncaring if I feel annoyed.
That s not a bad trait! You are just trying to find the balance... Or at least so it sounds... We are better than we think!
Thank you ❤️
I love you Michele
Seems they see us as their doormats or slaves 😔.
Only thing to do Mike, Is to move on and forget them and know yourself better. Hope you can get through this soon 😰
@@mikethesecond5029 You got this @Craig W
@@mikethesecond5029 Thanks but I didn't think you liked me ? But I will just let that go appericate the reply .
@@laurendowns9194 Thanks also !
@@laurendowns9194 Anyways thanks for your support just confused 🤔but we all make mistakes ! I really hope so want to move on .
Thats Gaslighting