"Thanks for being here" -----"I had no choice" 😂😂😂😂😂 Great episode and important one, very appreciative thank you Zoya and thank you Mal for consistently being a phenomenal host!
I feel you dear I am also queer and Persian and I live in Iran I understand how things could be rough for us let's just hope to have a better tomorrow where we can be ourselves❤
As a lesbian Persian girl who lives in Iran I totally get that pressure. The ones who were born before 2001 or so wouldn't even consider any options about sexualities but straight:) this podcast really helped me thanks a lot I love you @zoyaroya
You are not Lesbian. You just can not get the man you want. I know a lot of Girls who claim to be lesbian but they switch as soon as they find a good man.
Total feel you. Don't live in Iran. I live in Pakistan. But I can't even imagine what you guys probably go through over there, with all the misogynistic drama going on.
"hyper-aware and living on edge; Hiding from people, hiding yourself. Those things don't go away quickly. " I agree... I didn't know how to describe how I felt but watching this made me feel seen. Thanks, @zoyaroya for sharing your story.
“I never really thought much of anything. I was so focused on fitting in, I never took the time to dive deep into how I felt.” Really really resonates with masking to fit in and a level of neurodivergence that has been clouding things for so long.
Honestly, I feel like being able to mask is a privilege, to a certain degree. In regards to neurodivergence, I mean. I personally have never really been able to mask, as every time I tried, I failed. For a long time, I remember feeling so bad that no matter how hard I tried, it always failed. I’m glad I’ve eventually come to accept who I am, and have stopped trying. Though there are a lot of times where I was unsafe because I couldn’t mask. Now, I’m primarily upset at how disappointing the world is, and how much further we have to go with fixing bigotry (in regards to this post, ableism).
I love the representation with this video. Although I’m not Persian (I’m Indian), I totally resonate with the Mexican persona, personal isolation and it’s consequential effects, and the whole family dynamic/cultural viewpoints on the lgbtq+ community. This video is so inspiring and comforting. Seriously, thank you both so much. It’s incredibly amazing to see someone from the lgbtq+ community with your cultural background… wish we all had more representation like this! (I never comment on videos haha but this video is (happily) my exception).
That was really nice to see. Being a closeted afghan lesbian. I feel like I am the only gay afghan. I am convinced i will never ever come across another afghan lesbian. I am glad Zoya could come out and not lose her family, it is a huge risk to take, I could never be this brave to risk it all.
I saw this comment and had to sign in to reply. I wanted to let you know that I’m a gay Afghan - I know it feels like you’re alone in this but there’s so many of us. TikTok has been monumental for me. I’ve actually met quite a few LGBTQ Afghans including lesbians. You’re not alone. While I did come out to my family, I understand that everyone’s journey is different. Though I completely understand how extremely difficult it is. I want you to know that the shame of others is not yours to carry and you’re wholly deserving of an authentic life. You got this.
I wanted to tell you I'm Arab myself but my ex girlfriend was afghan, we were together for 5 years in meantime I learned so much about the afghan culture and dari language, Afghans will forever have a place in my heart because of the amount of love I got from my Afghan friends and my ex's family, so yes Afghan queers very much exist, you're not alone❤
Hi, i just want to say me too. Im a lesbian afghan. The weirdly isolating feeling is so real. Like i can accept my queerness but not in relation to my afghan-ness, like its hard to have them coexist. But still, i know that even tho its hard now, i think one day ill get there. We exist. We’re not alone
Great episode - we need a continuation of this please! I am Muslim & queer born in the U.K to immigrant parents. So much of what Zoya said resonated with me.. a huge part of me mourns all the years I’ve lost being closeted, and the shell of a person I’ve been through all of my past relationships. Unfortunately my parents passed away before I could come out to them but I did eventually come out to my siblings at 32! I’m only getting to live my REAL life now, in such a late part of my life. I don’t believe I or people in similar circumstances can ever fully be free. There is this sense of guilt that occasionally lurks in to remind me that I haven’t lived up to the expectations of my parents, the community, my faith.. it’s so hard wired and it’s something I will battle with forever. Anyway great to see minorities on this platform ❤️
Iran is not religious at a people level. At all. Persians are less religious than most Europeans. Iran's government is just brutal for many, many reasons that are political and above your pay grade. But again, that has nothing to do with Iranian people. Eastern Europe/Arabs/Georgia are genuinely homophobic people. Iranians are not. Get a clue. Even East Asians are more homophobic in my view. Metrosexuality was celebrated in Iranian culture for thousands of years too.@@mei2473
Love you Zoya! My lesbian daughter came out 2 years ago (her 2nd year of university) and it was rough going with her Persian father. It's okay now mostly because we create an environment where he doesn't have to be reminded and can pretend it's not true. Not how we want to live when she comes home on school breaks but it just makes life easier. I think his main issue is based around what others will think.
Neither queer nor Persian but absolutely loved listening to Zoya and her story. Thanks for sharing. And l do want to give a shout out to Mal for asking interesting questions & giving the space for Zoya to fully share her story without interrupting.
Zoya articulated it really well, that by hiding we do harm to ourselves. Thankyou Zoya for doing this episode. For people like me who relate (so much) to her experience, it’s really helpful to see an episode like this.
I really wish this episode were 5 hours long! I love Zoya so much, and I really look up to her like a big sister. It was super comforting watching this, and I didn't want it to end. Thanks for this gem of an episode, and I'm sending love to all kids who are struggling to come out to their immigrant parents. It gets easier I promise
Thank you so much for this episode! as a first generation Filipino American lesbian, I resonate so much with everything y’all talked about in this episode. I found myself just nodding my head to everything. Zoya said thanks for all the representation and Mal thanks for this podcast.
my partner and i met each other at 25 in shanghai，had a dog together at 28, came out to family at 30，immigrated to canada at 31，had two kids at 34……right now kinda suffering from the first generation immigrant parent burden of raising the kids well and not to mention at the same time being lesbian parents and being women facing job anxiety in the new country issue, so at least three aspects of burden at the same time, but i never regretted the choice of spending life with my partner. Hang on there friends everywhere❤
As a gay and Persian person , we are so proud of you Zoya the way you living your truth is admirable. I wish freedom and a better world for LGBT community especially in Middle East ❤️
I really wish one day we can stop carrying this weight of justifying the acts of our parents as "they were doing the best they could". they really hurt us and we deserved better
Iranian people don't even have a problem with it. Try going to Georgia (country where they attack gays), or any Orthodox Jewish, Conservative Christian region or country. They won't even offer the reassignment surgery Iran's government does, not to mention Iran's people are not religious at all.
I can relate to that feeling of ‘we didn’t have any option but to be straight.’ Back in my teenage years, I thought I could never have a relationship because I wasn’t attracted to boys like my friends were. I didn’t have my first relationship until I was 23. I thought I was missing something, tried to fit in, but it just didn’t work. This is our reality-we were just different.
It's wonderful when this beautiful host is a Lesbian and is so open and bold on sharing topics regarding women who are in love with women in various cultures. She deserves high honors in helping the community of women not to hold back but to feel free in a full open relationship. I totally trust her.
I've been really looking forward to watch this episode! Thank you @madeitoutpodcast & @zoyaroya for raising visibility on this topic! As a gay persian woman myself, I really feel seen and understood for the first time in my life! ❤
I am so glad you had Zoya on this episode. I’ve enjoyed the podcast so far since day 1 but this one hit home bc I’m a south Asian queer immigrant and have a big extended family with no queer elders and everything Zoya said is spot on. Thank you both Zoya & Mal ! And Mal for giving Zoya the space to talk. I hope you invite more diverse guests in the future ! 💫💕
I'm assyrian iraqi... it's crazy how identical our childhoods are. From pretending to be mexican to teachers thinking I was mute bc I didn't speak English.
I was touched by the comments. So many people suffering just because they want to show others who they are. I wish we lived in a world where people were allowed to be themselves.
I'm an ex Muslim. I couldnt continue being in a religion that made me question whether I should live or not. Even though I'm american, I was raised in the Deen and questioned myself for over 25 years.
Iranian here. Seriously nobody has time to bother you are gay or trance or straight. ❤ you seem to be sometimes so sad . This is how I feel from hearing your voice and seeing your face. It is so natural too. Immigration is always challenging in this society! Sending you support in my own way ❤ by the way it is good your mom asked you questions. My mom will act like she did not even hear me. Anything she didn’t like and felt it is stressful she did not hear 😅
It was a great podcast! I understood it so well because I’m also Iranian queer. It’s hard coming out when you have family members that don’t understand you. It’s great to know that I’m not alone. 💜🌈
I love hearing more and more about Zoya. You’re ambitious, have strength, passion, relatable, beautiful, the list goes on !!! I have yet to try your vegan fish. I’d love to soon. Also love this new podcast! I’ve been watching weekly and rewatching episodes because I can’t wait for the next one and also just to hear enlightenment that I might have missed the first time. It’s also hilarious and so comforting! Thanks all involved 🤍
This hurts my heart 😔 I can not imagine what it's like to not being accepted with open arms because I was very very lucky. And that first acceptance is so so important. Even when people come around eventually, it doesn't take away the pain and hurt and trauma and I think it will never be fully 'fixed'. Zoya you are absolutely wonderful and I am so happy to see that you are being loved by SO many people all over the world because people like you are the ones that need it the most! ❤️❤️❤️
I can relate so much to that pain and initial shame to have disappointed your immigrant parents by coming out. I think if you take the step to come out and you know you can escape in case of bad reactions, it is worth it because after that, it is as if a weight is lifted off your shoulders and you can finally breathe. Thank you for these talks!
So very interesting hearing about the culture and family issues. Such a shame some people and cultures are not more accepting of who we are as it causes so much grief. What a great guest.
Let’s hope the regime doesn’t get wind of this, but I’m a Persian lesbian who hasn’t fled the country. I’m out to my parents, close friends and relatives here, even though I’m from a religious Muslim family and live in a small city. After studying Quran in 2020 I’ve came to realize that Islam is not against homosexuality, but rape and cheating based on the story of Lut, and I’ve never had a closer relationship with the source of life. I’ve only recently realized I was born on the international day against homophobia and feel like none of this is accidental. And the thing is, I actually couldn’t imagine my current life being a possibility as a lonely odd teenager and was always planning to leave the only family I knew and loved for the possibility of ever having one of my own. I guess what I’m trying to say is, If you feel rejected by your own beliefs, by your community and family, just hang in there and be you and spread your inner love and light, things will turn around and you will find your bubble.
Similar conclusion about the Christian Bible and the story of Sodom & Gomorrah. Love is love. God is love. Lust when made into an idol above God is sinful. And that's independent of sexual orientation. Love is love! Get and keep your heart right with God and let your light shine forth like the dawn. Spread love.
Wow! My story is soo similar to Zoyas. I was born and raised in Los Angeles. My father is Jordanian and I never felt like I belonged in school. And I didn’t realize I was gay until college.
Thank you so much for this video, it has made me open my eyes up more to what my girlfriend is going through. She lives in Colombia and I live in Australia, so it is really hard for both of us knowing her family and friends don’t except our relationship.
Going to high school in Arizona, in the 80’s and I had several friends from Iran, Laos, and India and Mexico. They had left their countries with their families, so I really enjoyed knowing them, and finding their backgrounds of their homeland and their food.❤❤❤love the culture
@29:21 I feel the same way about being Jamaican. There's warmness with aspects of the culture. And I LOVE my culture so much. But there's still this underlining negative way in which that same culture sees gay people. And as a Jamaican lesbian it's a battle. Another great interview.😊 30:20 "rip the Band-Aid off" So true. I'm still not out to my parents. I might just rip that band aid off for 2024.
Awww I’m not Jamaican but I’m also Caribbean as I am Haitian…and yep that anti lgbtqia settlement is also shown in Haitian families and as a lesbian it makes me so depressed that I have to be in the closet
I think this episode is the most meaningful one (all of them were meaningful too) buy because I can relate to it most..with culture and society I was rased in.. so thank you girls, means a lot ❤
You should watch the "Heartstopper" series! And tell all your friends especially the irainians about it! It's one of the best shows I have ever watched.
I’m really glad and happy that youtube suggested me this podcast especially this episode.As an Iranian girl I really proud of you and thanks to both of you for not just making this podcast but sharing the story ❤
Thanks for sharing zoya it means a lot❤️hope that we all overcome to worry about these stuffs, and may the world let us all to be free however we want without being worried about the outcome.✨
24:41 it's a bitter sweet story and thank you for sharing that; I just wanna say as a Persian who lives in Iran and like 100% straight, still it's so so hard to live with the community and deal with couple of Persian parents! So your parents were some kind of bright angels! But I know it's very challenging being gay and Persian and immigrant at same time
Great podcast and another thoughtful conversation. Enjoyed meeting the ever articulate Zoya so much. Question: What is the title of the text Zoya was reading at 33:03 ? Intriguing words!
I come out sooner.. I did it (or actually, I was thrown out of the closet by my brother) when was 20.. And my parents' reactions were really like Zoya's. but they never came around. It's like coming out and not being heard or seen. And never talk about it again. I had a phase of being single and trying not to live my own sexuality because of that lack of acceptance. And I had to come out again like 5 years ago when I found someone I wanted to spend my life with (I was 33). And again, it was so painful and not really worth it, because it brought them distant again... And lastly, about a year ago, I had to tell them I got married. From a video. Because there was NEVER space to share anything real to them. It's like, I know I shouldn't care, and I say I don't. But it's so hard not to find that acceptance from the people who nursed you, and took care of you, and helped you become the little human person that is now out in the world trying to live well emotionally, physically. It's hard to take care of ourselves when there's this lack of importance shown to you as a human being by the people that sadly, matter the most. Anyways, I am so glad that more and more, the newer generation is having it easier, as their parents are younger, and have a better worldview and hopefully there won't be a need to come out anymore, heterosexuality will not be the norm, and what's "expected". Loved the episode. Thank you
My grandma’s part of the huge Persian community in Orange County and I’m so proud of u for being the first one to come out ❤🏳️🌈 This is giving me the courage to maybe someday be the next 🥹💖
I have a lot of respect for you Zoya. I think your parents must be proud of you. I am not a gay woman, but the way you handled your life with the restrictive culture we have is beyond comprehension. I wish you a happy life and peace with your family. When I was in Iran in high school I had a classmate whose last name was like yours. Maybe she is from your dad's side of the family. I live in Orange County now. Good luck dear.🙏🌺
9:50 I've visited the country multiple times and met at least two or three homosexuals at every gathering/party. I've never heard any of them talking about imprisonment or death penalty for homosexuality. Yes, homosexual PDA is highly frowned upon, and homosexuality is illegal on paper (no homosexual marriages), just like the rest of the Middle East (Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Lebanon, Turkey, etc.), but there are plenty of homosexuals living there. I think those who immigrate do so for economic reasons and probably seeking official marriage registration.
Thank you for this interview! It’s essential to keep these conversations going, even in 2024. I recently mustered up the courage to make a video about homophobia, where I featured your video (with the source included!), so anyone feel free to watch and share it if you’d like. We still have to keep fighting for basic human rights!
As a half persian/half hispanic queer woman who has never fit in with family or growing up in white racist US, it feels so sweet and amazing to have someone who looks like me and loves like me in the public eye because it genuinely makes it less horrible and more easy for me to accept myself💛
"Thanks for being here" -----"I had no choice" 😂😂😂😂😂 Great episode and important one, very appreciative thank you Zoya and thank you Mal for consistently being a phenomenal host!
😂
love their banter!!
as a queer persian girl this episode meant a lot to me, thank you Zoya and Mal ❤️
I feel you dear I am also queer and Persian and I live in Iran I understand how things could be rough for us let's just hope to have a better tomorrow where we can be ourselves❤
Gay not q
Haram
*Iranian, persia doesn't exist.
@@slapjuicewasn’t it still called Persia less than a century ago?
As a lesbian Persian girl who lives in Iran I totally get that pressure. The ones who were born before 2001 or so wouldn't even consider any options about sexualities but straight:) this podcast really helped me thanks a lot
I love you @zoyaroya
have u seen Circumstance (2011)? is it true it's like the most famous underground movie in Iran?
You are not Lesbian. You just can not get the man you want. I know a lot of Girls who claim to be lesbian but they switch as soon as they find a good man.
Total feel you. Don't live in Iran. I live in Pakistan. But I can't even imagine what you guys probably go through over there, with all the misogynistic drama going on.
Haram
remain strong! the regime will fall, and then everyone can be gay and free in Iran. Imagine gay pride in Tehran!
"hyper-aware and living on edge; Hiding from people, hiding yourself. Those things don't go away quickly. " I agree... I didn't know how to describe how I felt but watching this made me feel seen. Thanks, @zoyaroya for sharing your story.
“I never really thought much of anything. I was so focused on fitting in, I never took the time to dive deep into how I felt.”
Really really resonates with masking to fit in and a level of neurodivergence that has been clouding things for so long.
I definitely related to that.
Honestly, I feel like being able to mask is a privilege, to a certain degree. In regards to neurodivergence, I mean. I personally have never really been able to mask, as every time I tried, I failed.
For a long time, I remember feeling so bad that no matter how hard I tried, it always failed. I’m glad I’ve eventually come to accept who I am, and have stopped trying. Though there are a lot of times where I was unsafe because I couldn’t mask. Now, I’m primarily upset at how disappointing the world is, and how much further we have to go with fixing bigotry (in regards to this post, ableism).
I love the representation with this video. Although I’m not Persian (I’m Indian), I totally resonate with the Mexican persona, personal isolation and it’s consequential effects, and the whole family dynamic/cultural viewpoints on the lgbtq+ community. This video is so inspiring and comforting. Seriously, thank you both so much. It’s incredibly amazing to see someone from the lgbtq+ community with your cultural background… wish we all had more representation like this!
(I never comment on videos haha but this video is (happily) my exception).
I am not persian i am indian!!!
Which ethnicity from india????
Persian is an ethnicity and she is not persian, we dont own her.
@@تاجیکپنجشیری what do you mean she is not persian?
That was really nice to see. Being a closeted afghan lesbian. I feel like I am the only gay afghan. I am convinced i will never ever come across another afghan lesbian.
I am glad Zoya could come out and not lose her family, it is a huge risk to take, I could never be this brave to risk it all.
I saw this comment and had to sign in to reply. I wanted to let you know that I’m a gay Afghan - I know it feels like you’re alone in this but there’s so many of us.
TikTok has been monumental for me. I’ve actually met quite a few LGBTQ Afghans including lesbians. You’re not alone. While I did come out to my family, I understand that everyone’s journey is different. Though I completely understand how extremely difficult it is.
I want you to know that the shame of others is not yours to carry and you’re wholly deserving of an authentic life.
You got this.
@@Hsalzthank you so much for taking the time to respond. You are the first ever gay afghan I have interacted with haha. ❤
I wanted to tell you I'm Arab myself but my ex girlfriend was afghan, we were together for 5 years in meantime I learned so much about the afghan culture and dari language, Afghans will forever have a place in my heart because of the amount of love I got from my Afghan friends and my ex's family, so yes Afghan queers very much exist, you're not alone❤
Hi, i just want to say me too. Im a lesbian afghan. The weirdly isolating feeling is so real. Like i can accept my queerness but not in relation to my afghan-ness, like its hard to have them coexist. But still, i know that even tho its hard now, i think one day ill get there. We exist. We’re not alone
Great episode - we need a continuation of this please! I am Muslim & queer born in the U.K to immigrant parents. So much of what Zoya said resonated with me.. a huge part of me mourns all the years I’ve lost being closeted, and the shell of a person I’ve been through all of my past relationships. Unfortunately my parents passed away before I could come out to them but I did eventually come out to my siblings at 32! I’m only getting to live my REAL life now, in such a late part of my life. I don’t believe I or people in similar circumstances can ever fully be free. There is this sense of guilt that occasionally lurks in to remind me that I haven’t lived up to the expectations of my parents, the community, my faith.. it’s so hard wired and it’s something I will battle with forever. Anyway great to see minorities on this platform ❤️
As a child of Arab immigrant , i can relate to this . Well said Zoya
Not trying to be mean, but what does Iran have to do with Arab countries? Nothing.
@@ciaronsmith4995Arab countries are also hella religious and homophobic
Iran is not religious at a people level. At all. Persians are less religious than most Europeans. Iran's government is just brutal for many, many reasons that are political and above your pay grade. But again, that has nothing to do with Iranian people. Eastern Europe/Arabs/Georgia are genuinely homophobic people. Iranians are not. Get a clue. Even East Asians are more homophobic in my view. Metrosexuality was celebrated in Iranian culture for thousands of years too.@@mei2473
Love you Zoya! My lesbian daughter came out 2 years ago (her 2nd year of university) and it was rough going with her Persian father. It's okay now mostly because we create an environment where he doesn't have to be reminded and can pretend it's not true. Not how we want to live when she comes home on school breaks but it just makes life easier. I think his main issue is based around what others will think.
Neither queer nor Persian but absolutely loved listening to Zoya and her story. Thanks for sharing. And l do want to give a shout out to Mal for asking interesting questions & giving the space for Zoya to fully share her story without interrupting.
I loved how zoya talked about the struggles that the children of immigrants go through, it was enlightening to listen to it
Zoya articulated it really well, that by hiding we do harm to ourselves. Thankyou Zoya for doing this episode. For people like me who relate (so much) to her experience, it’s really helpful to see an episode like this.
I really wish this episode were 5 hours long! I love Zoya so much, and I really look up to her like a big sister. It was super comforting watching this, and I didn't want it to end. Thanks for this gem of an episode, and I'm sending love to all kids who are struggling to come out to their immigrant parents. It gets easier I promise
as an iranian im proud to have zoya as a representative of us
Thank you so much for this episode! as a first generation Filipino American lesbian, I resonate so much with everything y’all talked about in this episode. I found myself just nodding my head to everything. Zoya said thanks for all the representation and Mal thanks for this podcast.
thank you so much mal for this podcast. seriously you have no idea how much conversations like this mean to me and make me feel less alone.
Loving this channel. Mal is such a polished interviewer; relaxed and casual while always maintaining the thread of the conversation. Glad I found it.
thank you🥹❤️
my partner and i met each other at 25 in shanghai，had a dog together at 28, came out to family at 30，immigrated to canada at 31，had two kids at 34……right now kinda suffering from the first generation immigrant parent burden of raising the kids well and not to mention at the same time being lesbian parents and being women facing job anxiety in the new country issue, so at least three aspects of burden at the same time, but i never regretted the choice of spending life with my partner.
Hang on there friends everywhere❤
Hello from another Canadian lesbian!!! ❤❤❤
As a gay and Persian person , we are so proud of you Zoya the way you living your truth is admirable.
I wish freedom and a better world for LGBT community especially in Middle East ❤️
I really wish one day we can stop carrying this weight of justifying the acts of our parents as "they were doing the best they could". they really hurt us and we deserved better
This was wonderful, thanks for sharing, more LGBTQIA Middle East voices need to be heard!
Iranian people don't even have a problem with it.
Try going to Georgia (country where they attack gays), or any Orthodox Jewish, Conservative Christian region or country. They won't even offer the reassignment surgery Iran's government does, not to mention Iran's people are not religious at all.
I can relate to that feeling of ‘we didn’t have any option but to be straight.’ Back in my teenage years, I thought I could never have a relationship because I wasn’t attracted to boys like my friends were. I didn’t have my first relationship until I was 23. I thought I was missing something, tried to fit in, but it just didn’t work. This is our reality-we were just different.
It's wonderful when this beautiful host is a Lesbian and is so open and bold on sharing topics regarding women who are in love with women in various cultures. She deserves high honors in helping the community of women not to hold back but to feel free in a full open relationship. I totally trust her.
There’s sth about this girl, her presence is soooooo calming and earthy!is that a word??😂idk i enjoy listening to her❤️
I've been really looking forward to watch this episode! Thank you @madeitoutpodcast & @zoyaroya for raising visibility on this topic! As a gay persian woman myself, I really feel seen and understood for the first time in my life! ❤
I am so glad you had Zoya on this episode. I’ve enjoyed the podcast so far since day 1 but this one hit home bc I’m a south Asian queer immigrant and have a big extended family with no queer elders and everything Zoya said is spot on. Thank you both Zoya & Mal ! And Mal for giving Zoya the space to talk. I hope you invite more diverse guests in the future ! 💫💕
I love the diversity. Pls bring more diverse audience. Lovely podcast.
Iranians are classified as white on the census. Look up what the word "Iran" means.
They are caucasians genetically. It's deep stuff.
I'm assyrian iraqi... it's crazy how identical our childhoods are. From pretending to be mexican to teachers thinking I was mute bc I didn't speak English.
it’s wonderful how much representation and different stories you can bring on this podcast! Loving it, keep doing it!
I was touched by the comments. So many people suffering just because they want to show others who they are. I wish we lived in a world where people were allowed to be themselves.
I’ve never resonated with someones story so much. Thank you for helping me! I also come from immigrant parents and I relate so much.
So grateful for your podcast as a baby gay at 36.
as a closeted queer muslim from Indonesia, thank you so much for making this episode!!! it literally meant so much to me!!!!💜💜
I'm an ex Muslim. I couldnt continue being in a religion that made me question whether I should live or not. Even though I'm american, I was raised in the Deen and questioned myself for over 25 years.
Zoya joon, to ro kheyli doost daaram jonke YOU ARE LIVING AUTHENTICALLY AS YOUR SELF and it’s so inspiring. Daste shomaa dard nakone!!!
Iranian here. Seriously nobody has time to bother you are gay or trance or straight. ❤ you seem to be sometimes so sad . This is how I feel from hearing your voice and seeing your face. It is so natural too. Immigration is always challenging in this society! Sending you support in my own way ❤ by the way it is good your mom asked you questions. My mom will act like she did not even hear me. Anything she didn’t like and felt it is stressful she did not hear 😅
What a beautiful, deep message as always💖 Thank you for sharing!!
It was a great podcast! I understood it so well because I’m also Iranian queer. It’s hard coming out when you have family members that don’t understand you. It’s great to know that I’m not alone. 💜🌈
As a queer Persian girl who lives in Iran I feel your pain dear I just want you to know you are not alone and some day everything will get better:)
Zoya,
I know you must be such a great roll model to the young people in the persian community.
Your family are extremely proud of you💐💐😍😍
I love hearing more and more about Zoya. You’re ambitious, have strength, passion, relatable, beautiful, the list goes on !!! I have yet to try your vegan fish. I’d love to soon. Also love this new podcast! I’ve been watching weekly and rewatching episodes because I can’t wait for the next one and also just to hear enlightenment that I might have missed the first time. It’s also hilarious and so comforting! Thanks all involved 🤍
This hurts my heart 😔 I can not imagine what it's like to not being accepted with open arms because I was very very lucky. And that first acceptance is so so important. Even when people come around eventually, it doesn't take away the pain and hurt and trauma and I think it will never be fully 'fixed'. Zoya you are absolutely wonderful and I am so happy to see that you are being loved by SO many people all over the world because people like you are the ones that need it the most! ❤️❤️❤️
Wow, this is so relateable. Thank you for sharing, Zoya.
Thanks for sharing zoya, I completely resonated with her story and feeling as though within a culture or around people different to you
I can relate so much to that pain and initial shame to have disappointed your immigrant parents by coming out. I think if you take the step to come out and you know you can escape in case of bad reactions, it is worth it because after that, it is as if a weight is lifted off your shoulders and you can finally breathe. Thank you for these talks!
I’m learning so much abt Persian culture from this convo.❤Thanks for posting
So very interesting hearing about the culture and family issues. Such a shame some people and cultures are not more accepting of who we are as it causes so much grief. What a great guest.
Let’s hope the regime doesn’t get wind of this, but I’m a Persian lesbian who hasn’t fled the country. I’m out to my parents, close friends and relatives here, even though I’m from a religious Muslim family and live in a small city. After studying Quran in 2020 I’ve came to realize that Islam is not against homosexuality, but rape and cheating based on the story of Lut, and I’ve never had a closer relationship with the source of life. I’ve only recently realized I was born on the international day against homophobia and feel like none of this is accidental. And the thing is, I actually couldn’t imagine my current life being a possibility as a lonely odd teenager and was always planning to leave the only family I knew and loved for the possibility of ever having one of my own. I guess what I’m trying to say is, If you feel rejected by your own beliefs, by your community and family, just hang in there and be you and spread your inner love and light, things will turn around and you will find your bubble.
I’ve come to a similar conclusion after studying the Quran too ❤
Persian!
ایا فارس هستی!!!!؟
Are u ethnic persian!!!?
If not, never use persian.
Be real.
قومیت خودت را ذکر کن فارس را نه. و فارسهارا نام بد نکن.
Story of Lut As
Similar conclusion about the Christian Bible and the story of Sodom & Gomorrah. Love is love. God is love. Lust when made into an idol above God is sinful. And that's independent of sexual orientation. Love is love! Get and keep your heart right with God and let your light shine forth like the dawn. Spread love.
Stop lying about Islam ! Its well known that Islam does not accept gays or lesbians and those who act as lesbian or gay its BIG SIN !
Wonderful, great to hear your Story, thanks for sharing....i really like the ripple effect. Show the World who you are, thats why we are here for 💜
Wow! My story is soo similar to Zoyas. I was born and raised in Los Angeles. My father is Jordanian and I never felt like I belonged in school. And I didn’t realize I was gay until college.
I totally like this format. Such a great podcast!
Zoya is so well articulated . A true role model
That was just Perfect! I enjoyed every second of it, So proud of you Zoya and thank you for being Honest and sharing with us.
Thank you so much for this video, it has made me open my eyes up more to what my girlfriend is going through. She lives in Colombia and I live in Australia, so it is really hard for both of us knowing her family and friends don’t except our relationship.
Don’t get played by a 3rd world 304
Going to high school in Arizona, in the 80’s and I had several friends from Iran, Laos, and India and Mexico. They had left their countries with their families, so I really enjoyed knowing them, and finding their backgrounds of their homeland and their food.❤❤❤love the culture
I’m so so thankful for this podcast ❤️❤️❤️
The part with the persian lady having a stroke made me cry. I relate to this episode so much. Thanks love❤
You're just lovely Zoya. So proud of you. Wish you all the best in the world.
omg as a persian and also a lesbian im so proud of her she did such a good job representing our culture (what’s happening rn and how it used to be)
Don’t lie you’re not Persian
She is@@solohabib7
what a wonderful interview!
It was a wonderful episode, thanks Zoya for speaking freely and honestly
She is lovely and so well articulated!
Thank you zoya for sharing your story! Your dimples are so cute
Zoya we are very proud of you. Persian women are so strong and such an inspiration to all of us Persian men.
Absolutely enjoyed this episode.
make them last longer!!!! pleaseeeee
love the podcast! wish it was longer
@29:21 I feel the same way about being Jamaican. There's warmness with aspects of the culture. And I LOVE my culture so much. But there's still this underlining negative way in which that same culture sees gay people. And as a Jamaican lesbian it's a battle. Another great interview.😊 30:20 "rip the Band-Aid off" So true. I'm still not out to my parents. I might just rip that band aid off for 2024.
A JAMAICAN LESBIAN omg I feel so alone 😭
@@jordanyaedwards168Right 😭 I'm also a Jamaican lesbian and I don't know a single other one. Most isolating thing ever.
Awww I’m not Jamaican but I’m also Caribbean as I am Haitian…and yep that anti lgbtqia settlement is also shown in Haitian families and as a lesbian it makes me so depressed that I have to be in the closet
@@blueizumi Us Caribbean queers are obviously out here. We need to find community with each other.
@@jordanyaedwards168 Caribbean Queers Unite🫡 It does feel isolating.
she's such a pure soul with the most beautiful genuine smile 😍
I’m really glad that you had Zoya as a representer, thank you!
Zoya as a Persian man I’m proud of you. Keep doing what you’re doing.🌹🌹🌹
in tears watching this. thank you Zoya for speaking up on your journey, we queers in Iran wish we were you(lol). stay happy❤
Thanks my dear for being this much courageous and you are the LIGHT for gay people in Iran ,thanks for being you!!
This was the perfect interview ❤
I think this episode is the most meaningful one (all of them were meaningful too) buy because I can relate to it most..with culture and society I was rased in.. so thank you girls, means a lot ❤
I love you Zoya. What an incredible journey
Just an all-around extremely impressive human being..
You should watch the "Heartstopper" series! And tell all your friends especially the irainians about it! It's one of the best shows I have ever watched.
I’m really glad and happy that youtube suggested me this podcast especially this episode.As an Iranian girl I really proud of you and thanks to both of you for not just making this podcast but sharing the story ❤
Thanks for sharing zoya it means a lot❤️hope that we all overcome to worry about these stuffs, and may the world let us all to be free however we want without being worried about the outcome.✨
As a lesbian persian girl with religious parents I relate to this so much
Me too:)
@@hasti204:)))
Same, so much resonates. Its such a unique life experience that feels like its never anywhere in media, so this feels so special and real
@@evasyoutubeera exactly!
Great interview! I can relate to this! I'm a black 25 year old black girl born and raised in a christian and third world latin country called Panama.
Love Zoya....they are pure joy!
24:41 it's a bitter sweet story and thank you for sharing that; I just wanna say as a Persian who lives in Iran and like 100% straight, still it's so so hard to live with the community and deal with couple of Persian parents! So your parents were some kind of bright angels! But I know it's very challenging being gay and Persian and immigrant at same time
Great podcast and another thoughtful conversation. Enjoyed meeting the ever articulate Zoya so much. Question: What is the title of the text Zoya was reading at 33:03 ? Intriguing words!
I come out sooner.. I did it (or actually, I was thrown out of the closet by my brother) when was 20.. And my parents' reactions were really like Zoya's. but they never came around. It's like coming out and not being heard or seen. And never talk about it again. I had a phase of being single and trying not to live my own sexuality because of that lack of acceptance. And I had to come out again like 5 years ago when I found someone I wanted to spend my life with (I was 33). And again, it was so painful and not really worth it, because it brought them distant again... And lastly, about a year ago, I had to tell them I got married. From a video. Because there was NEVER space to share anything real to them. It's like, I know I shouldn't care, and I say I don't. But it's so hard not to find that acceptance from the people who nursed you, and took care of you, and helped you become the little human person that is now out in the world trying to live well emotionally, physically. It's hard to take care of ourselves when there's this lack of importance shown to you as a human being by the people that sadly, matter the most. Anyways, I am so glad that more and more, the newer generation is having it easier, as their parents are younger, and have a better worldview and hopefully there won't be a need to come out anymore, heterosexuality will not be the norm, and what's "expected". Loved the episode. Thank you
Great interview. Honest and real.
My grandma’s part of the huge Persian community in Orange County and I’m so proud of u for being the first one to come out ❤🏳️🌈 This is giving me the courage to maybe someday be the next 🥹💖
Beautiful story, glad she's happy.
Great interview!!!
Perfect Persian dark humor. I miss my Persian friends 😢❤
I have a lot of respect for you Zoya. I think your parents must be proud of you. I am not a gay woman, but the way you handled your life with the restrictive culture we have is beyond comprehension. I wish you a happy life and peace with your family. When I was in Iran in high school I had a classmate whose last name was like yours. Maybe she is from your dad's side of the family. I live in Orange County now. Good luck dear.🙏🌺
9:50 I've visited the country multiple times and met at least two or three homosexuals at every gathering/party. I've never heard any of them talking about imprisonment or death penalty for homosexuality. Yes, homosexual PDA is highly frowned upon, and homosexuality is illegal on paper (no homosexual marriages), just like the rest of the Middle East (Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Lebanon, Turkey, etc.), but there are plenty of homosexuals living there. I think those who immigrate do so for economic reasons and probably seeking official marriage registration.
Great interview and a charming and calm guest. Somewhat sad too...
Thank you for this interview! It’s essential to keep these conversations going, even in 2024. I recently mustered up the courage to make a video about homophobia, where I featured your video (with the source included!), so anyone feel free to watch and share it if you’d like. We still have to keep fighting for basic human rights!
Thank you to both of you
Somehow that episode made me cry
As a half persian/half hispanic queer woman who has never fit in with family or growing up in white racist US, it feels so sweet and amazing to have someone who looks like me and loves like me in the public eye because it genuinely makes it less horrible and more easy for me to accept myself💛
I truly enjoyed this! Thank you for sharing. I'd absolutely love to marry a middle eastern woman! Hopefully someday I can find her.. 🙂
I’m so glad that you are happy now. I’m so sorry about your experience coming out to your family. 😢❤
This video was such an openeyer, I learned alot and it was very cute at the same time. Thank you!