Dr. Daniel Amen's Secret to Getting Your Kids to Listen to You
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- Опубліковано 17 кві 2024
- It seems so simple, but this one activity is crucial to forming strong bonds with your kids, which in turn makes them much more eager to listen to you and participate in your family. This clip, taken from Dr. Daniel Amen's television special "Raising Mentally Strong Kids", outlines the details and instructions for this special activity, which if practiced regularly, will radically transform your relationship with your children.
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No one is born knowing how to be a parent. It is appreciated to have individuals like dr Amen dedicated to work, research and share his findings. I am not the perfect mom, but definitely his work is helping me to get better as a mother.
Spot on! No parenting manual anywhere. I find this helpful,I have shared with other parents.❤
Thank you for being here!
Wow! Amazing.
Amen 🙏🏽
You're absolutely right. The hard part though is when you have 4 kids ... 20 minutes of uninterrupted 1:1 special time for all 4 is hard to achieve
From what I've seen when there's a connection there's respect and they seem to care more about their behavior and they care about your opinion.
This is so true, thank you for phrasing it so precisely!
Thanks a million😊
This is so accurate and is great advice. I do this with my younger 2 kids but have such a hard time doing it with my older daughter.
Thank you so much for this!
Thank you dear Daniel ❤
Brilliant, as always 👌🏼
I have a 3 year old and this is wonderful.
Thank you, it’s great advice.
Enjoy our kids.
Some of my best memories are playing Barbie and Construction Zone Trucks with my kids in the yard. Or setting up the sprinklers to spin around for running through in the summertime or slip & slides or crafting and coloring with them and just reaponding to whatever comes up.
Love the point here about these days everybody is talking at each other rather than with one another. It makes the world feel so cold and hard.
So those moments of Barbie or Excavation time to build the racetrack for the hot wheels is amazing.
Thank you for this!
Thank you!! Wonderful video. ❤❤
Thank you so much for sharing 🙏🏻❤
Thank you for the wonderful reminders! God bless you and your family!
Thank you for sharing 🙏🏻
Thank you so much sir.
Great advice
I wish I could rewind my time with my kids!!
How old are your kids? It is never too late.
Never too late!
Great lessons. This video appeared on perfect time in my life. Thank you doctor! 🙏
X2
Perfect!
I needed this lesson today. Thank you Dr!
This goes for marriages too. Thank you so much.
Thanks so much
When Fadime, the daughter of Muhammad (peace be upon him) came home, our Prophet showed her his seat , let her seat tjere ,kissed her by the hand, and valued her. He Did this 1400 years ago, he would visit the child whose pet bird died and sit there and chat with him.
The last prophet Muhammad .When we want to learn something, we look at what he did in his life time .He is our guide❤️.Just few things he did from million . just like drop from oceon❤️
We Muslims❤️
I am so much enjoying listening to his biography by Yasser Qadhi
@@TheConservativeHippieI love his Sira by Yasir Qadhi. I have listened to 23 videos (2 or 3 times each) so far and I can't get enough of it.
like button hit.. i don't agree with everything Daniel says but, the experience and knowledge is of an extremely high standard and this man has done so much for the promotion of neurology / electronegativity in the brain etc... Big respect for you!
Thanks!
Mother of six - this will help our family thank you 😊
So glad.
Too many kids
That was just very good.
Thank you for this information Dr.Amen 🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾❤️
Thanks!
Thanks Dr. Amen. You've really had a profound impact on my own brain health - and this video struck a chord with me as well. I'll incorporate this with my son, makes a lot of sense to me.
So happy to hear this!
Worth hearing....
Definitely will listen more which i already do as my 2 twin boy's nearly 5 are chatter boxes 😅.. i always try and acknowledge what they say but again being busy mum and giving me time can make children unhappy and not listening
This is valuable instruction, thank you.
Thanks!
Love it, love it, love it. I already started to apply (it is not easy but I am optimist😊). Thank you sooo much.
Awesome!
Thanks
I want to spend more time with my kids and actively listen to them
You got this!
I wish I could go back and do a redo with my now grown sons. Grandparents get it right after making many mistakes.
never too late!
Say that to them! It may help heal wounds or trauma they've experienced.
I love him
Active listening is essential but harder than it seems...
I was just going to said that 😊
Yep parents have to slow down and really try active listening and responding. Our children would really take away so much from it
The connection has to stay in place though.
My mother had a great connection with us when we were little, as we got older though we could tell she didn’t really want to be around us anymore.
This is seems to be more practical!
But you grew up really well with that father.
This is what I attempt to do.. but anymore my son has become so combative & argumentative.. I struggle immensely to not be reactive despite my best efforts. 😔We used to be close, special time used to bring great connection. Now all he wants is screens & talks back & I feel like I’m failing & he pushes me away more & more.
I feel the same, my daughter is 14 and we the same issues as you which is sad 😢
Screens are the root of all evil.
Mine are still young, oldest is 9.5 yo, so I can still control screen time.
When I cut screen time they become happy playful children again.
@@shaymashiach3320 I feel that sentiment.. but reality is they need the knowledge & skills to navigate the world, which has become very tech driven whether we like it or not.. plus all their friends are online bc I’m apparently the only parent that doesn’t let my kids sit in front of screens for hours. So I try to emphasize *balance* without them feeling deprived bc then they get obsessed. And they have to do their other stuff chores, outside time, learning time etc before screen time. But they are obsessed & addicted despite all these efforts so idk anymore 🤷🏻♀️ it’s so frustrating
Disable the phone and put in a land line maybe?
@@sexywarriorwomen she doesn’t have a phone only an ipad and it has screen time and downtime 😔 i will try to do one to one outings i used to do it when she was younger
My job was scheduled around my daughter’s schedules all her life. I always believed Time is love. I always have an active listen and comfort her, I supported her in every way. Unfortunately, when she turned 26, she moved out and cut me off. What did I done wrong?
I left as is. Now she turns into religion. I wanted her to see you, but she didn’t care for.
You did well, you did not do anything wrong, and she probably needs time to figure out her identity outside you. Once she is done with the discovery phase, she'll connect again. Hopefully,it's a true religion.❤
Yes, you did well. One counselor told me there is not one thing we say or do that guarantees that our children will want a relationship with us as grown adults. That allowed me to rid the idea of being a “perfect” mom.
What if you have 4 kids? Do you give them 20 minutes each or together ?
Dr. Amen, even after active listening the teenage child is too stubborn and does not change their mind, then what should the parents do? How do we set the boundary?
I’d be very curious to hear his answer on this.
Respond not React- Tell your child calmly that you understand why they want it that way , however you have these boundaries for a good reason and explain the reasons and the consequences of not having it with examples if possible.
When the child is treated with love and empathy with respect for their choices without judging, it will have a positive effect on the child and the child will surely be bound to think about your decision trying to understand it, even if they disagree.
When this approach is followed over a period of time, the child will start to respect and thereby trust the parent more , leading to.a more healthy positive relationship with less conflicts and more acceptance.
How to get this started when you ask them to spend time if they dont want to 😢
How about if you have multiple kids - can you a play a (card) game with all of them together for 20/30 minutes - is that enough ‘special’ time?
With multiple kids, work, school - 20 mins per day for each becomes difficult. But if it’s not the same as individual - I’ll have to work much harder than I guess.
I allocate 20 minutes for each (3), sometimes I ask them what they want to do, and then write it down and work in a time, other times it is spontaneous, during the weekdays it is hard to get the time, but they have learned to respect each others time. Definitely worth the effort though.
My daughter always asks me to draw( she draws soon she get up until time going to bed) so whenever she ask me i drop what im doing and draw with her.
I have 3 little and i have one on one time with each of them.
How do you manage to have one on one time with each other ?
I have three, too and it's a complex equation...
@@saoundenerval9995 when Dad's day off, I take them out for an hour at a time. I have 8 year old and 4 year old twins, so I try to balance between them.
2:25 special time, 20 minutes with no questions
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
00:00 *📜 Wpływ wartości i relacji rodzinnych na dzieci*
- Nurturing bonds with children fosters healthy influence.
- Quality time and active listening are essential for building strong relationships.
- Spending dedicated, undirected time with children is crucial for connection.
01:30 *🕰️ Wartość specjalnego czasu i jego wpływ na relacje rodzic-dziecko*
- Specjalny czas, czyli 20 minut dziennie bez poleceń czy pytań, wzmacnia więzi.
- Koncentracja na obecności i aktywnym słuchaniu dziecka buduje zaufanie.
- Przykłady skuteczności specjalnego czasu w poprawie relacji rodzic-dziecko.
04:06 *👂 Aktywne słuchanie jako klucz do budowania relacji*
- Aktywne słuchanie polega na powtarzaniu słów dziecka i skupianiu się na jego emocjach.
- Pozwala to na otwartą komunikację i zwiększa zrozumienie między rodzicami a dziećmi.
- Unikanie narzucania własnych opinii i zainteresowanie uczuciami dziecka wzmacnia więzi rodzinne.
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Hard when you have autistic non verbal grandsons.
In our country, if the kid stubborn, we use ROTAN. And then they will learn lah... 😂😂😂
You guys need to learn it from Asian moms. They are pros in this case. Their weapon of choice were a wooden stick, electrical wire and thier sandals.
Lot's of doodoo. You can actively listen, without allowing your kid to cheat at a game, or allow blue hair.
Spare the rod, spoil the child.