Jared dropped a gem - a person interested in your pleasure, may not necessarily be interested in you as a person. On other note, I’m getting the impression both sexual compatibility and emotional intimacy are equal needs for Shan, however it’s not clear that their fbuddy to spouse relationship developed the emotional intimacy she requires.
"A person interested in your pleasure may not necessarily be interested in you as a person." Wow. I fascinating how this was put.. I honestly feel this is a very mellow way to communicate a person being sexually objectified lol
agreed but it’s not even about it being smart it comes natural to her and she wasn’t trying to keep him attached. I wouldn’t try this because I know I would get attached but I wish I had it in me to be more free and detached lol
@@EarCandyAsmr I agree. I been seeing this guy for the last year and a half. When we met, I had been single for about 7 months and the last thing I wanted to do was worry about a another relationship or trying to be in one. We mutually seemed to be on the same page because he never mentioned a relationship or any strong feelings so that's my assumption. I wanted to be single for a while, even though me and him met and it just continued on. I got feelings for him and I like him but
I think if you're scared of catching feelings, then it's key that your F buddy is someone you don't like lol. Like physically they perform great in bed but if the sex wasn't there, you wouldn't never date them. That would work for you.
I know Shan doesn’t like to claim “luck” but the cosmos or divine timing was def on their side. I still think this is very, very, rare and most will get the short end of the stick. Even a successful fwb sometimes lack the consistency and longevity for one of the parties involved. From me and my friends experiences!
This is probably true and also part of it is Shan was honest with herself, honest with Jarod, and Shan’s communication skills are almost unmatched so a lot of it was Shan’s approach and communication style.
Good Luck to all the women holding out for "the one" while they are funking around. Most men trade down in both years and education level of a woman when they are ready to settle --
@@lisaariottiart well it’s hold out for somone you are compatible with and a situation you feel you are deserving of or choose to settle. I’d rather be alone than do that. Good luck to those people
@@EJ-ne4cs agreed! I refuse to settle. Nobody is perfect. However, I will be with just anyone out of fear of being alone because I haven’t found what I truly deserve.
I love them lol. Their relationship is how mine started as Friends with benefits. My partner and I hooked up for 3 years before we got into a relationship. We have been exclusive for 10 years. We are currently talking about introducing other people both together and separate. We are to the point communication is so great between us there is no jealousy and if it did come up then we could be completely honest about our feelings. Communication and boundaries are key!
It’s rare to see the open/poly relationships last long term. They work, til they don’t. But why mess with what’s been working? I’ve been around a lot of the people in the community, and often many are using sex as a hobby and are trying to find fulfillment in an area that it is impossible to find. It will be fun, but the desire for more is always there. Also, a lot of women I have found, even in the community, when they are really into a guy, have much less desire for other male partners. Look at this video, case in point. But of course you are free to do as you wish, just throwing in my unasked for two cents lol
@@jaredmello it depends on what you mean by rare. To me, I mean if you look at the statistics, every relationship has a higher rate of failure or chance of failure the longer people are together, monogamy included. Just look at the rate of failure of marriage. Now if you add in how many people date seriously and break up without getting married, I mean the number is astronomical lol.
This was so helpful! Each tip helped me better assess where I’ve failed in the past, and why I probably shouldn’t pursue this again in the future. “Don’t hire a janitor when you need a CEO”, aka be honest about your desires and expectations. Thanks for helping me keep it real with myself.
I think raising young people in this type of sexual culture is seriously damaging. As adults we should teach kids how to love and care for people before we teach them how to fuck and not get involved and leave them.
@Marie Baker I’d argue women are NOT raised to be wives (in the traditional sense) modern, western women are not traditional, yet want traditional outcomes. Men are not resided to “plow” everything. Currently 30% if the men under 30 years of age are virgins. I’m so tired of this victim mindset as well… Even if I said 30% of the time it’s got the most egregious acts (infidelity, abuse etc). The other 50% would be to “irreconcilable differences” essentially no fault divorces (a newer concept) has given women an out because they may feel some type of way about something. We know women feelings change A LOT!
@Marie Baker that’s most divorces NOT all but we know for a fact the majority of divorces files are by women. And the men women desire most may behave that way… but let’s be serious most men are invisible to most women…..
@Marie Baker the primary reason is “irreconcilable differences/lack of commitment” abuse, finance falls very low as why women divorce. All women think they’re 10s in terms of attractiveness. So their expectations will of a man is unrealistic, go watch Rebecca Lynn Pope (prior dating coach for women) who outlined why she quit match making women because they’re unrealistic expectations. Most women don’t even believe they have a level to date at that………..
Thinking back to my successful f buddy, not spending too much time together was important. Looking back, he checked many boxes. Smart. Seemingly private. Thoughtful. Respected. But expecting more was a never an issue and our relationship met my needs at the time. We both ended up in other relationships and never talked, but continued when we were both single again later on. Then I got into my new (and longest) relationship and he moved away. We haven’t spoken since. It was an insane physical attraction and mutual understanding that was a drama free and pleasurable experience. My current relationship threw me for a loop. It’s the cuddling after man! Dangerous territory lol. I’ve realized I’m better when I have comfort.
@@digitalhistorian7786 true. I had a FWB relationship with an ex, we were both married (to other people of course lol), yes it was bad, we still love each other although live in different states so cannot have each other physically.
I have a long term FWB. It's not about non-attachment for me. Its friendship first. We would be friends regardless. My FWB I have no romantic feelings for. This is natural not forced. I have one long distance for 11 years on and off. Another who is like my best friend for 4 years. We move towards each other equally and don't want more from each other. I hope we are friends for life regardless of what happens. Always cuddle but it doesn't feel like a lover it feels like the warmth of a loyal friend. We formed a friendship first without agendas in both cases.
I am a fan!!!!!! So do you engage others in a romantic/intellectually & emotionally intimate way outside of the sexual relationship you have with your f buddy friend?
Sex is the glue that holds relationships together, and in their case having good sex was the prerequisite for the relationship to even happen at all. Also fellas, remember she didn’t wind up with the guy she was just cuddling with .
A lot of women end up with the guy they cuddle with. If anything women fall on the opposite side. Not ending up with the physical guy and actually having a relationship with the cuddler. Only because the cuddler tends to cuddle you with coins too. So they end up being a provider and someone who is not there for sex..it makes you want to fully lean into the stable provider relationship. Then that sex ends up being better than the former
You were the best part of too hot too handle this year, I hope Netflix saw that because it made me want you to have your own show doing workshops like that or something!x
At one point I had 4 sexually and intellectually compatible fwb’s at the same time. I’m now exclusively dating one and I must say I miss the extreme transparency and honesty of when I was in that predicament. They had no reason to lie and nor did I. I was always satisfied in every aspect and got whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. To have freedom and satisfaction is like a continuous fucking explosion equivalent to sex. If I could go back with the same men I would.
While I am happy it worked for them, I think this video falls more in the “I can’t say this will work for you but it worked for me” category. I get we would like to be super progressive and create formulas to out smart human nature but let’s be honest, most of the time F Buddies don’t end well UNLESS both parties mutually fall for each other. At which point it’s just regular dating around with more steps. It’s antidotal but take into account that Shan and Jerod are giving tips to being successful F Buddies as a couple who only have been able to successfully be F Buddies to each other. Now they are married with 2 kids. Lol Looking through the comment the only people that speak fondly about F Buddies are people interested in trying it or people who did it and now are in committed relationships. That should tell you something.
@Media Watch Possible in the sense that anything is possible. But when it comes to how likely a person could have this type of relationship for a significant period of time without it ending badly, it is VERY unlikely. The control of emotions aspect is really saying “If you can out smart your own human nature and biology, then you can be in a F buddy relationship.” Evidence would suggest that is why things go south in F Buddy situations.
I'm for sure one of those women who have been without relationships and sex for years at a time. In my experience it's been about learning who I am, being with men have been pleasurable and at the same time I've wanted to avoid hurt feelings, attachments and commitments. I also have high standards of health for my body and want a man who does as well. I was really afraid of getting pregnant a few years ago with a man I didn't want to get pregnant with which makes me want to reserve sex for men I can see myself having children with. I know we have prevention methods but I don't want to go anywhere near the pill, and to keep it all the way real I don't use condoms. Usually they fall in love and I run lol, but I have not been good at communicating boundaries at all, so much so that I've been sexual with men I really didn't want to be sexual with. I've gotten waay better at communicating my boundaries and even knowing what they are. So I am hopeful at coming together with a man, being intimate and sexual, but I'm not in a rush. I do be missing that physical touch tho for sure! 💧
After writing this I had Shan’s voice in my head; letting me know how I’m limiting myself by ruling condoms completely our, maybe there is a right kind of condom for me? When I’m honest I haven’t really given them a fair chance. So I’ve been looking up natural & eco friendly condoms.. and the results are really promising 😏💦
i really enjoyed this conversation. i love the way you figured how to address this kind of situation by trying to make it a conscious exchange, but i think the reality of it is that by placing all of these boundaries and rules, you’re just trying to close your eyes to a reality that simply cannot be evaded. and that is that sex is a deeply connecting experience to have with another, even beyond having those “intimate life conversations”. you are inherently connecting your life source energy with another and you cannot scape that no matter how many boundaries you place. i think that is why these kind of relationships rarely work and end up harming people on the way. great analysis though.
I would like to bring into another point of view that came to me, which is that I believe because of those boundaries, there is space to invite someone in your life and create a 'playground' (being the boundaries): a place of a consensus where both parties agree that we're meeting each-other in this playground and are exploring to see if there's a connection there (and what kind of connection that is). Like kids in the playground, right, you walk up to someone, start playing together and sometimes it ends in an argument, sometimes you've had a great day but also seperate ways again and is fine as is, and sometimes it blossoms into something more, a deeper friendship or relationship and you continue to meet each-other. The playground, the structures, help to lay out a foundation for that meeting. And yes you're right about the deeply connecting experience + life source part, I completely agree with you and I myself barely have had a sexual relationship nor have I been participating in any for a long time for that same reason you state. Yet I have discovered that by which I just wrote down doesn't have to exclude a healthy relationship and if done in a careful manner with understanding over your needs (maybe being; I would not be able to deal with a f-buddy relationship because say, sex is a vulnerable part of me that I wish to honour through a more emotional bond with someone) and tap into your own authority. For those that find commitment more difficult i.e., it can be a great meeting point of assessing if this is indeed someone you wish to build lasting things with. I really valued your comment but I also wanted to share what I've been learning for myself! Doesn't have to be for everyone and I'm still not having sexual relations myself, but I definitely have shifted the inner-experience towards it and towards approaching relationships a lot -- it's continuously changing according to what enters my life and what I allow and choose. F-buddy relations used to be very harmful for me too, because I was needing a lot more and kept desiring for more. While I wasn't being truthful to myself and wasn't acting/communicating and deciding according to what I needed to those that provided (or didn't provide) that. I had a rough time cutting that cord, while it was my saving grace and has been a real growth. Sorry a bit personal there! just wanted to tap into your comment and share :).
My most successful fuckbuddy is one where we only talked a bit the initial meeting. After that we only hook-up and don’t talk about things outside of sex. We even saw each other at a club and didn’t say hi. I know people always say communication is key, but I feel like that doesn’t always have to be verbal communication. We both understand by how we do this, with set boundaries that it is a fuckbuddy situation. And not knowing the ins and the outs of person can (in this case) make the seks really good and exciting. This has been going on for a year now and I really enjoy it. I do however also have other people I hook up with with who I hang out with and cuddle. Which I also find pleasurable, but can at times become more confusing. So then communication is more important I think. Really enjoyed this video!
You are SO fun to watch. I enjoy watching you individually yet together you are a bomb combo. You are both interesting unique humans! Thanks for your consistency and everlasting entertaining intimicy education. LOVE
Loved the video but can we say that they had a successful f buddy relationship if they ended up married?? Haha love their chemistry. It just shows how it’s darn near impossible to be f buddies without catching feelings…especially when that person is your type
My ex and I started as fuck buddies too. On and off for three years and then things switched for him. I think cause we started hooking up when he was 23 so by 26 he started to want to build something long term and i was that bitch. I realized early on we weren't compatible as more than just fuck buddies but I loved bim as a friend and so I got sucked into a year long relationship before ending things. I've had a 5 month long fwb and I stayed detach. For me I have to go for guys that I can't see long term with for some reason, then I can keep my heart out of it. So I've gone for men twice my age for that reason, cause I know I wouldn't settle down with them.
I feel like everyone diff. For me it was very important to have genuine friends w my friends w benefits and can genuinely so for me it worked. I have 2 life long frimds from it and sex didn't mess that up. For me having fun dinner roadtrip the whole enchilada w no commitment is what I wanted and although it was a little messy at the beginning. I has two friends w benefits for 5 to 10.yrs. only being intimate w them in between when I was single.
No Pain No Gain. We really do Gain soooo much from "heartbreak" and being let down. That includes family, love partners and friends. I THANK GOD for what I know now. I could only show Grace with these people. I HAD to learn them lessons. I HAD to know the same people who love you can absolutely hurt you. I HAD to learn there's no getting "even". I HAD to learn my part. I HADDDDDD TOOOOO ! LHM We were INNOCENT. NOW WERE BRAVE. 💯 SALUTE TO THE HEALED BADDDDD MAMA JAMMERS ON GOD ✈️
@@jaredmello I guess I should have clarified that I meant in the context of this video, because the original comment was vague. I know about pretty privilege. But research has shown a human tendency towards assortative mating meaning we select partners with similar characteristics or of similar status. So technically an unconventionally attractive person should have options, other “unconventionally attractive” people, and an exceptionally attractive person wouldn’t “date down” anyway so to speak. Most people should have the ability to find a fwb whether “conventionally attractive” or not. (I use quotes because I hate all of this superficial bs and wish we were blind to each other’s exteriors initially and saw intent, auras, natures, personality, character, etc. first) *edit: maybe I should have said “date outside of their range” instead of “down” just making it clear that I’m speaking as a spectator, in my world a prettier person is not higher or more valuable by default.
I'm newly single (still healing the wounds) and just recently entered an f buddy situation, so I really needed to hear all this coz I feel myself starting to get a bit attached 🤦🏾♀️. It really is important to set boundaries and not read into things. I also didn't know about the cuddling afterwards thing dang coz I really like cuddling just to kinda relax and take in the moment y'know. Do I really gotta cut that out 🙉
I am glad to have come across this video because i found myself wanting more in fuckbuddy relationships. I even stopped hooking up cuz i kept getting hurt because they wouldn't cuddle, kiss or chat. Watching this video shows that we should have done better in communicating. Especially on my end. Thank you Shan x Jared. Love y'all!
This no feelings I don’t want love mind frame really has ruined this world. I’ve been on it myself, but I also the future doesn’t look bright for us with this mind frame. The building of families has been broken apart smh
This is a useful video...I had a great f-buddy situtation, but in the last 3 weeks recently things have started to fizzle out, my buddy has become increasingly distant. I approached him about if he wants to end things, and he explained that he's feeling generally burnout, and wants to minimise his interactions with people. He said he's not sure when he'll want to pick things up again...I honestly don't know what that means, and it has left things up in the air, which is unsettling for me.
I'm not Shan, nor am I a professional in this area, but here's my advice, should you decide to take it. I think it's better for your peace of mind and lack of confusion to end it and move on with someone else (if you're comfortable with that). Whether you decide to let him know is 100% your decision and dependant on what your relationship is like with this guy. If he later on down the road decides he's ready to continue, you can decide if you want to as well. But don't sit and wait for him. You could also push him to give you a rough estimate of when he's likely to be back on it and plan according to that information. Again, I'm not a professional in this area and I don't know you personally, but those are just some ideas on what to do if you're completely blank on ideas.
Y'all are the worst cause y'all are adorable and cute and goals. Fuck buddy's don't work because if you are sexually compatable out the gate you're inately connected with the person and that often makes either 1 of you curious about the potential. And if you are good communicators it means you make a good team so you're naturally inclined to thinking about what that would be like if you pursued it... But that's just my 2 cents. Y'all are adorable and look where you started🚶🏾♂️❤️
A lot of people comments tell me that are afraid of the committing to a relationship and wanting they freedom but at the same time want the relationship just as a friends title instead.
@@moneytime1556 Its like they want a safety net & explore other people on their terms. But of course since you're the "friend" you are "special" Smh...
@@NallahBrown People that got avoidant attachment styles are scared of commitment. It’s pretty much not a relationship they prefer friends with benefits/ situations without emotional connection. If you any one do want a emotional connection then dating a avoidant person is a bad idea. Anxious and avoidant people often attract each other. But there are situations where to 2 avoidant people date and there’s no emotional connection just friend vibes and space.
This is a good topic. From my experience 3-4 months is usually the time from from when things start to go down him. I’ve been on both sides. People start braking the boundary rules and force you into an ultimatum. You mess around and find a Badu box and mess your whole life up. She got all them men loyal to her till this day because they had that experience. It’s a dangerous game of Russian roulette. 🤣
I love this. I have two coexisting fwbs that imo works because, one is more on the friends side, we spend hours together kissing, cuddling, and hanging out but the sex isn't great (I enjoy it but.. ) and I would never want a relationship with him. The other is just a fbuddy, we never spend more than 45-60 min together, the sex is good/great but we never cuddle or hang out. And yeah, they both have good qualities but not for a relationship 😅
Great content. Fuck buddies is not my thing but what u share is really super interesting for me who don’t understand signs and is loose On boundaries. I fooled myself many times with guys who wanted only to be fuck buddies but we’re not being straight up about it. If a man touches my cervix is touching my heart thru vagus nerves, find that weird that only cuddle parts creates attachments. Any way, science don’t consider subtle bodies which they will one day hopefully. In esotericism and religion , it is known just penetrating someone creates energy untaglement and karmic soup. what matters is how cute u guys are and In love. U embody what u share with so much integrity that s amazing.
@@lisaariottiart you’re not an outlier, you’re intelligent. I find it interesting a married couple is teaching be single and have a fwb. Instead of find a person in move into a union with them…
@Marie Baker Their marriage is not really "open" and has never been. They have the option to be with someone else, but since married neither have taken up on it.
I love yall so much omg yall are a huge part of why my current relationship is thriving. My partner and I also started off as friends with benefits and moving forward ive used alot of yalls advice and just modes of operating within ur relationship as a bit of a model for my own and its been such a huge contribution. I hope to meet yall some day like not even in a fanboy way entirely but just because I feel so aligned with you as people even though i only know what im seeing of you from your videos. All in all ive been following since before yall even got together and its been a beautiful experience to walk alongside in a way over the years im so excited to see whats to come. Yall are truly a blessing
I wanna' know how he found a woman to exclusively cuddle with? Yes "he". Shan had a dude playing a role I honestly thought was unrealistic for me. Is she an anomaly? How would I show I have the temperament for that? How and when do I say I want that? In the meantime I'll get started with saying it now.
God help you if you’re ever the cuddle guy lmaoo. You definitely not on your purpose if a woman can compartmentalize you into serving her needs instead of yours being met too.
Seeing this video, I believe I found my partner 5 years ago because of Shannon. Our relationship started so similar to Her + Jared’s. Definitely a F-Buddy situation with clear consistent communication around how each of us felt about the sex and the connection. But it took us deciding to go on an impromptu road trip after months + months of only having a sexual connection - to find that we actually really liked one another and wanted to get a bit more serious. I think watching Shan’s content help me truly realize what I wanted therefore attract the best partner for that time in my life and allowed it to organically grow into something more. 🥺🙌🏾💯
I’m having such a tough time with just hooking up. I can only sleep with someone I really like or see a relationship with and it makes me feel like a relationship junkie sometimes😂. I’m trying to just hookup to have fun to see if I can but it’s so difficult that I just haven’t at all. This is helping me a lot yo🧐thanks👍🏼. I’ll try it out and I’m hoping it’ll work🤔😂🤞.
Thanks for having this conversation! I think it’s worth having (especially if you’re looking for something casual). I’m not sure if this will work for me, but I was curious to hear the tips (just in case)!
Idk how bro can sit here & let her basically say “I don’t like you i just wanna use you” & rub it in his face. I don’t feel like either are genuine, FWB catch feelings & eventually narcissistic traits start to pop out.
My fwb always wants to cuddle or chill after sleep over. Discuss vulnerabilities smh . No boundaries whatsoever. And he fails to accept them now so I stopped
Lolll what about how to marry your fxck buddy 😭🤣 I'm kidding. I don't even have sex. I'm part of the consciously single because I don't think partnering is relevant or will add any value to my life 💀 like I'm single single I don't even kiss 🤣 I don't even have a talking phase 🤣 I'm sexually celibate 🤣 But I'm watching this just in case I change my mind 👀👀👀👀🤣
Friends with benefits never worked for me. Once I don’t feel jealous I just don’t have that much interest in the person and can easily get swept up by another person. Plus once I’ve settled with being fuck buddies and go find other partners then the fuck buddy gets jealous and seeks exclusivity. I prefer trying to make a connection. I want the sex and cuddling together lol. Maybe I’m Demi?
Nah im on the same boat to you as well, i'm a bit weirded out with the idea of being with someone i don't really care about, granted not necessarily the love of my life; but not even a slightest of care/connection? Nah life's too short for that lmao
I can relate with the sexual connection. It has been my experience that finding one person who has all elements I seek is very difficult. My required elements include, and are not limited to, sexual intimacy, intellectual conversations, physical & sexual chemistry, open-mindedness, willingness to travel & experience life together, and have a hustle mentality.
Hi guys. Love your channel. I work in sound and just a suggestion. There are sennheiser clips that are very cheap and go on the lav. The clip I’m referring too eliminates the shuffling of the clothes and that makes it so you don’t have to see the mic. It can be taped to your chest and it would look way better.
@@boricua584 sure it’s possible but why not go for guys who don’t just want to use you for your body. If that’s the kind of relationship you want and don’t care about emotions, then scratch whatever I say lol. Live life the way that makes you happy regardless of what others may think.
@@BeatzByMK That first part is like why not just … insert anything. Lol. If things were that simple then they would be done, but more importantly believe it or not some people don’t want that and do just want a friends with benefits etc, i was like that for a while and I found someone who I was cool with and who caused me 0 problems.
First of I think Shane body was very selfish in the beginning and self seeking when it came to her current partner.The only reason she with him now because he eventually got better at whatever area he lacked in.On Jared he never left her cause she was the most beautiful woman he had and still has.My question is that would Shan body allow Jared to have relations with a much young partner and do what she did to him without guilt tripping him and also staying committed to him since she hurt him a lot.my question to Jared would be would you stay with her if you had found a much beautiful attractive woman.Thanks..not on any side just curious.
Jared dropped a gem - a person interested in your pleasure, may not necessarily be interested in you as a person. On other note, I’m getting the impression both sexual compatibility and emotional intimacy are equal needs for Shan, however it’s not clear that their fbuddy to spouse relationship developed the emotional intimacy she requires.
yeah in the beginning, I think it did overtime
"A person interested in your pleasure may not necessarily be interested in you as a person." Wow. I fascinating how this was put.. I honestly feel this is a very mellow way to communicate a person being sexually objectified lol
@@NallahBrown yeah thats a really good way of putting it 😕
Indeed a gem i never looked it that way.. smh so having good intense sex doesn't me they like me beyond it.. so sad but glad about the realization
@@sweetcapricorn really saddening
Shans smart, she didn’t let herself get too attached to him, gave him space and that’s how it kept him interested 😌
agreed but it’s not even about it being smart it comes natural to her and she wasn’t trying to keep him attached. I wouldn’t try this because I know I would get attached but I wish I had it in me to be more free and detached lol
Nigga...The fact that you don't recognize that this is just being a Psychopath shows how fallen we are.
thats called manipulation lol
@@digitalhistorian7786 No. It's called discernment. I think more women should have it.
@@EarCandyAsmr I agree. I been seeing this guy for the last year and a half. When we met, I had been single for about 7 months and the last thing I wanted to do was worry about a another relationship or trying to be in one. We mutually seemed to be on the same page because he never mentioned a relationship or any strong feelings so that's my assumption. I wanted to be single for a while, even though me and him met and it just continued on. I got feelings for him and I like him but
I think if you're scared of catching feelings, then it's key that your F buddy is someone you don't like lol. Like physically they perform great in bed but if the sex wasn't there, you wouldn't never date them. That would work for you.
I did that and let me tell u fell in love with the D. We did have the relationship conversation and we don’t have the same values so we didn’t
I know Shan doesn’t like to claim “luck” but the cosmos or divine timing was def on their side. I still think this is very, very, rare and most will get the short end of the stick. Even a successful fwb sometimes lack the consistency and longevity for one of the parties involved. From me and my friends experiences!
So true!
So true!!!
Facts
This is probably true and also part of it is Shan was honest with herself, honest with Jarod, and Shan’s communication skills are almost unmatched so a lot of it was Shan’s approach and communication style.
I agree. Plenty of women have don't what she has
I don’t think partnership is not priority. I think people are learning to hold out for what feels genuine and real because life is too short.
Mmmm, that’s definitely a valid point and should be discussed too
Good Luck to all the women holding out for "the one" while they are funking around. Most men trade down in both years and education level of a woman when they are ready to settle --
agreed these arrangements can end well but most of the time they don’t that’s why people hold out
@@lisaariottiart well it’s hold out for somone you are compatible with and a situation you feel you are deserving of or choose to settle. I’d rather be alone than do that. Good luck to those people
@@EJ-ne4cs agreed! I refuse to settle. Nobody is perfect. However, I will be with just anyone out of fear of being alone because I haven’t found what I truly deserve.
I love them lol. Their relationship is how mine started as Friends with benefits. My partner and I hooked up for 3 years before we got into a relationship. We have been exclusive for 10 years. We are currently talking about introducing other people both together and separate. We are to the point communication is so great between us there is no jealousy and if it did come up then we could be completely honest about our feelings. Communication and boundaries are key!
Same with me and my now husband
Friends with benefits for 2 years dated for 3 more and married for 3 now 🥰
Moral of the story the cuddle guy got no ass guys dont be the cuddle guy
It’s rare to see the open/poly relationships last long term. They work, til they don’t. But why mess with what’s been working? I’ve been around a lot of the people in the community, and often many are using sex as a hobby and are trying to find fulfillment in an area that it is impossible to find. It will be fun, but the desire for more is always there. Also, a lot of women I have found, even in the community, when they are really into a guy, have much less desire for other male partners. Look at this video, case in point. But of course you are free to do as you wish, just throwing in my unasked for two cents lol
@@jaredmello it depends on what you mean by rare. To me, I mean if you look at the statistics, every relationship has a higher rate of failure or chance of failure the longer people are together, monogamy included. Just look at the rate of failure of marriage. Now if you add in how many people date seriously and break up without getting married, I mean the number is astronomical lol.
@@jaredmello so maybe we're looking at failure in relationships the wrong way.
This was so helpful! Each tip helped me better assess where I’ve failed in the past, and why I probably shouldn’t pursue this again in the future. “Don’t hire a janitor when you need a CEO”, aka be honest about your desires and expectations. Thanks for helping me keep it real with myself.
Exactly!!
I think raising young people in this type of sexual culture is seriously damaging. As adults we should teach kids how to love and care for people before we teach them how to fuck and not get involved and leave them.
Thank you!!
@Marie Baker I believe there’s way more “traditional seeking” men then there are women. Plus, women leave their marriages at a 70% rate.
@Marie Baker I’d argue women are NOT raised to be wives (in the traditional sense) modern, western women are not traditional, yet want traditional outcomes. Men are not resided to “plow” everything. Currently 30% if the men under 30 years of age are virgins.
I’m so tired of this victim mindset as well…
Even if I said 30% of the time it’s got the most egregious acts (infidelity, abuse etc). The other 50% would be to “irreconcilable differences” essentially no fault divorces (a newer concept) has given women an out because they may feel some type of way about something. We know women feelings change A LOT!
@Marie Baker that’s most divorces NOT all but we know for a fact the majority of divorces files are by women. And the men women desire most may behave that way… but let’s be serious most men are invisible to most women…..
@Marie Baker the primary reason is “irreconcilable differences/lack of commitment” abuse, finance falls very low as why women divorce. All women think they’re 10s in terms of attractiveness. So their expectations will of a man is unrealistic, go watch Rebecca Lynn Pope (prior dating coach for women) who outlined why she quit match making women because they’re unrealistic expectations. Most women don’t even believe they have a level to date at that………..
How to Have Sex Without Getting Attached:
Step 1: Be completely dead inside.
That's all.
Thinking back to my successful f buddy, not spending too much time together was important. Looking back, he checked many boxes. Smart. Seemingly private. Thoughtful. Respected. But expecting more was a never an issue and our relationship met my needs at the time. We both ended up in other relationships and never talked, but continued when we were both single again later on. Then I got into my new (and longest) relationship and he moved away. We haven’t spoken since. It was an insane physical attraction and mutual understanding that was a drama free and pleasurable experience.
My current relationship threw me for a loop. It’s the cuddling after man! Dangerous territory lol. I’ve realized I’m better when I have comfort.
It really be the cuddling 🙆🏽♀️🙆🏽♀️🙆🏽♀️
cant have your cake and eat it too all the time
@@digitalhistorian7786 true. I had a FWB relationship with an ex, we were both married (to other people of course lol), yes it was bad, we still love each other although live in different states so cannot have each other physically.
It's Shans brutal honesty for me :D and Jared seems to like it :D
They are good for the long run.
I have a long term FWB. It's not about non-attachment for me. Its friendship first. We would be friends regardless. My FWB I have no romantic feelings for. This is natural not forced. I have one long distance for 11 years on and off. Another who is like my best friend for 4 years. We move towards each other equally and don't want more from each other. I hope we are friends for life regardless of what happens. Always cuddle but it doesn't feel like a lover it feels like the warmth of a loyal friend. We formed a friendship first without agendas in both cases.
Love this. Yes.
I’m jealous, but happy for you too lol
@@chelseavp7 As a single demi sexual not sure how I would survive without my friends lol
Seems like y’all understand the idea of having love and fondness for each other without forcing something unnecessarily.
Love that for y’all 🥰🥰🥰🥰
I am a fan!!!!!! So do you engage others in a romantic/intellectually & emotionally intimate way outside of the sexual relationship you have with your f buddy friend?
Sex is the glue that holds relationships together, and in their case having good sex was the prerequisite for the relationship to even happen at all. Also fellas, remember she didn’t wind up with the guy she was just cuddling with .
A lot of women end up with the guy they cuddle with. If anything women fall on the opposite side. Not ending up with the physical guy and actually having a relationship with the cuddler. Only because the cuddler tends to cuddle you with coins too. So they end up being a provider and someone who is not there for sex..it makes you want to fully lean into the stable provider relationship. Then that sex ends up being better than the former
You were the best part of too hot too handle this year, I hope Netflix saw that because it made me want you to have your own show doing workshops like that or something!x
this was so fun to watch so many good points I still feel too emotionally attached for casual sex
At one point I had 4 sexually and intellectually compatible fwb’s at the same time. I’m now exclusively dating one and I must say I miss the extreme transparency and honesty of when I was in that predicament. They had no reason to lie and nor did I. I was always satisfied in every aspect and got whatever I wanted whenever I wanted. To have freedom and satisfaction is like a continuous fucking explosion equivalent to sex.
If I could go back with the same men I would.
Polyamory exists, just saying. Just because you’re in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to be monogamous.
@@Ilikefrogs.. He wants to be monogamous and I love him too much too loose him for that.
Maybe that's one of the drawbacks of f*** buddies, it can be so good and satisfying that it doesn't get better than that
I am soooooo in the same situation 😂
Same here!
While I am happy it worked for them, I think this video falls more in the “I can’t say this will work for you but it worked for me” category. I get we would like to be super progressive and create formulas to out smart human nature but let’s be honest, most of the time F Buddies don’t end well UNLESS both parties mutually fall for each other. At which point it’s just regular dating around with more steps.
It’s antidotal but take into account that Shan and Jerod are giving tips to being successful F Buddies as a couple who only have been able to successfully be F Buddies to each other. Now they are married with 2 kids. Lol
Looking through the comment the only people that speak fondly about F Buddies are people interested in trying it or people who did it and now are in committed relationships. That should tell you something.
@Media Watch Possible in the sense that anything is possible. But when it comes to how likely a person could have this type of relationship for a significant period of time without it ending badly, it is VERY unlikely.
The control of emotions aspect is really saying “If you can out smart your own human nature and biology, then you can be in a F buddy relationship.” Evidence would suggest that is why things go south in F Buddy situations.
I'm for sure one of those women who have been without relationships and sex for years at a time.
In my experience it's been about learning who I am, being with men have been pleasurable and at the same time I've wanted to avoid hurt feelings, attachments and commitments.
I also have high standards of health for my body and want a man who does as well. I was really afraid of getting pregnant a few years ago with a man I didn't want to get pregnant with which makes me want to reserve sex for men I can see myself having children with. I know we have prevention methods but I don't want to go anywhere near the pill, and to keep it all the way real I don't use condoms. Usually they fall in love and I run lol, but I have not been good at communicating boundaries at all, so much so that I've been sexual with men I really didn't want to be sexual with. I've gotten waay better at communicating my boundaries and even knowing what they are. So I am hopeful at coming together with a man, being intimate and sexual, but I'm not in a rush. I do be missing that physical touch tho for sure! 💧
After writing this I had Shan’s voice in my head; letting me know how I’m limiting myself by ruling condoms completely our, maybe there is a right kind of condom for me? When I’m honest I haven’t really given them a fair chance.
So I’ve been looking up natural & eco friendly condoms.. and the results are really promising 😏💦
Shan BOODY i am so interested! Could you make a video on the relationship dynamics of your cuddle buddy, how you found him and where is he now?
i really enjoyed this conversation. i love the way you figured how to address this kind of situation by trying to make it a conscious exchange, but i think the reality of it is that by placing all of these boundaries and rules, you’re just trying to close your eyes to a reality that simply cannot be evaded. and that is that sex is a deeply connecting experience to have with another, even beyond having those “intimate life conversations”. you are inherently connecting your life source energy with another and you cannot scape that no matter how many boundaries you place. i think that is why these kind of relationships rarely work and end up harming people on the way. great analysis though.
I would like to bring into another point of view that came to me, which is that I believe because of those boundaries, there is space to invite someone in your life and create a 'playground' (being the boundaries): a place of a consensus where both parties agree that we're meeting each-other in this playground and are exploring to see if there's a connection there (and what kind of connection that is). Like kids in the playground, right, you walk up to someone, start playing together and sometimes it ends in an argument, sometimes you've had a great day but also seperate ways again and is fine as is, and sometimes it blossoms into something more, a deeper friendship or relationship and you continue to meet each-other. The playground, the structures, help to lay out a foundation for that meeting. And yes you're right about the deeply connecting experience + life source part, I completely agree with you and I myself barely have had a sexual relationship nor have I been participating in any for a long time for that same reason you state. Yet I have discovered that by which I just wrote down doesn't have to exclude a healthy relationship and if done in a careful manner with understanding over your needs (maybe being; I would not be able to deal with a f-buddy relationship because say, sex is a vulnerable part of me that I wish to honour through a more emotional bond with someone) and tap into your own authority. For those that find commitment more difficult i.e., it can be a great meeting point of assessing if this is indeed someone you wish to build lasting things with. I really valued your comment but I also wanted to share what I've been learning for myself! Doesn't have to be for everyone and I'm still not having sexual relations myself, but I definitely have shifted the inner-experience towards it and towards approaching relationships a lot -- it's continuously changing according to what enters my life and what I allow and choose. F-buddy relations used to be very harmful for me too, because I was needing a lot more and kept desiring for more. While I wasn't being truthful to myself and wasn't acting/communicating and deciding according to what I needed to those that provided (or didn't provide) that. I had a rough time cutting that cord, while it was my saving grace and has been a real growth. Sorry a bit personal there! just wanted to tap into your comment and share :).
A lickle Aftercare for a couple minutes after that “climax high” is definitely a top tier need lol
I love when Shan wears that eyeshadow color. Always makes her eyes pop and skin glow.
My most successful fuckbuddy is one where we only talked a bit the initial meeting. After that we only hook-up and don’t talk about things outside of sex. We even saw each other at a club and didn’t say hi. I know people always say communication is key, but I feel like that doesn’t always have to be verbal communication. We both understand by how we do this, with set boundaries that it is a fuckbuddy situation. And not knowing the ins and the outs of person can (in this case) make the seks really good and exciting. This has been going on for a year now and I really enjoy it. I do however also have other people I hook up with with who I hang out with and cuddle. Which I also find pleasurable, but can at times become more confusing. So then communication is more important I think. Really enjoyed this video!
You are SO fun to watch. I enjoy watching you individually yet together you are a bomb combo. You are both interesting unique humans! Thanks for your consistency and everlasting entertaining intimicy education. LOVE
You have to be Very mature to be able to Navigate through this process and then become Exclusive 🤔 Hats off to you guys ❤🥰
Loved the video but can we say that they had a successful f buddy relationship if they ended up married?? Haha love their chemistry. It just shows how it’s darn near impossible to be f buddies without catching feelings…especially when that person is your type
My ex and I started as fuck buddies too. On and off for three years and then things switched for him. I think cause we started hooking up when he was 23 so by 26 he started to want to build something long term and i was that bitch. I realized early on we weren't compatible as more than just fuck buddies but I loved bim as a friend and so I got sucked into a year long relationship before ending things. I've had a 5 month long fwb and I stayed detach. For me I have to go for guys that I can't see long term with for some reason, then I can keep my heart out of it. So I've gone for men twice my age for that reason, cause I know I wouldn't settle down with them.
I feel like everyone diff. For me it was very important to have genuine friends w my friends w benefits and can genuinely so for me it worked. I have 2 life long frimds from it and sex didn't mess that up. For me having fun dinner roadtrip the whole enchilada w no commitment is what I wanted and although it was a little messy at the beginning. I has two friends w benefits for 5 to 10.yrs. only being intimate w them in between when I was single.
No Pain No Gain. We really do Gain soooo much from "heartbreak" and being let down. That includes family, love partners and friends. I THANK GOD for what I know now. I could only show Grace with these people. I HAD to learn them lessons. I HAD to know the same people who love you can absolutely hurt you. I HAD to learn there's no getting "even". I HAD to learn my part. I HADDDDDD TOOOOO ! LHM
We were INNOCENT.
NOW WERE BRAVE. 💯
SALUTE TO THE HEALED BADDDDD MAMA JAMMERS ON GOD ✈️
It blows my mind how different the lives of attractive and not attractive people are.
Would you mind elaborating?
Would love to hear more as well.
Yep
@@dlizzy3835 attractive people have way more options and people treat them differently. I’d know 😉
@@jaredmello I guess I should have clarified that I meant in the context of this video, because the original comment was vague. I know about pretty privilege. But research has shown a human tendency towards assortative mating meaning we select partners with similar characteristics or of similar status. So technically an unconventionally attractive person should have options, other “unconventionally attractive” people, and an exceptionally attractive person wouldn’t “date down” anyway so to speak.
Most people should have the ability to find a fwb whether “conventionally attractive” or not.
(I use quotes because I hate all of this superficial bs and wish we were blind to each other’s exteriors initially and saw intent, auras, natures, personality, character, etc. first)
*edit: maybe I should have said “date outside of their range” instead of “down” just making it clear that I’m speaking as a spectator, in my world a prettier person is not higher or more valuable by default.
I'm newly single (still healing the wounds) and just recently entered an f buddy situation, so I really needed to hear all this coz I feel myself starting to get a bit attached 🤦🏾♀️. It really is important to set boundaries and not read into things. I also didn't know about the cuddling afterwards thing dang coz I really like cuddling just to kinda relax and take in the moment y'know. Do I really gotta cut that out 🙉
Yup. If you don’t things are gonna get ugly quick. 11:30
Also don’t let them touch your breast. That breeds attachment. You can research it.
@@coachzaynab355 omggggg
I am glad to have come across this video because i found myself wanting more in fuckbuddy relationships. I even stopped hooking up cuz i kept getting hurt because they wouldn't cuddle, kiss or chat. Watching this video shows that we should have done better in communicating. Especially on my end. Thank you Shan x Jared. Love y'all!
This no feelings I don’t want love mind frame really has ruined this world. I’ve been on it myself, but I also the future doesn’t look bright for us with this mind frame. The building of families has been broken apart smh
The sexually active and consciously single stats really opened my mind being I thought I was alone in this. Really good discussion and view point! 🖤
Wow I realized iv literally been doing this whole fbuddy thing soo wrong I’m almost embarrassed 🥴😂 great information
This is a useful video...I had a great f-buddy situtation, but in the last 3 weeks recently things have started to fizzle out, my buddy has become increasingly distant.
I approached him about if he wants to end things, and he explained that he's feeling generally burnout, and wants to minimise his interactions with people. He said he's not sure when he'll want to pick things up again...I honestly don't know what that means, and it has left things up in the air, which is unsettling for me.
I'm not Shan, nor am I a professional in this area, but here's my advice, should you decide to take it.
I think it's better for your peace of mind and lack of confusion to end it and move on with someone else (if you're comfortable with that). Whether you decide to let him know is 100% your decision and dependant on what your relationship is like with this guy. If he later on down the road decides he's ready to continue, you can decide if you want to as well. But don't sit and wait for him.
You could also push him to give you a rough estimate of when he's likely to be back on it and plan according to that information.
Again, I'm not a professional in this area and I don't know you personally, but those are just some ideas on what to do if you're completely blank on ideas.
He's probably got another f buddy
You don’t have to “end it” bc it’s not a relationship. Find another love
Get out your feelings cause you definitely caught some.
Y'all are the worst cause y'all are adorable and cute and goals.
Fuck buddy's don't work because if you are sexually compatable out the gate you're inately connected with the person and that often makes either 1 of you curious about the potential.
And if you are good communicators it means you make a good team so you're naturally inclined to thinking about what that would be like if you pursued it...
But that's just my 2 cents. Y'all are adorable and look where you started🚶🏾♂️❤️
I feel like it takes a certain personality and attachment style to get a good experience out of being fuck buddies. I don’t think I’m one of them.
Glad you mentioned attachment style
Glad you mentioned attachment style
Here for the Braids by Brady
Can we consider a f body relationship successful if it resulted in marriage?
Marriages are the only way to keep “score” of any relationship…
If "idol minds are the devil's playground" was a video
It's "idle minds."
Lmaoo 😂
Basically, looking for a f-buddy is like looking for a relationship!! 🤷🏾♀️
Cause it IS a relationship.
@@NallahBrown EXACTLY!! And yet people are surprised when "feelings" show up. I mean....DUH!!! LOL!!
A lot of people comments tell me that are afraid of the committing to a relationship and wanting they freedom but at the same time want the relationship just as a friends title instead.
@@moneytime1556 Its like they want a safety net & explore other people on their terms. But of course since you're the "friend" you are "special" Smh...
@@NallahBrown People that got avoidant attachment styles are scared of commitment. It’s pretty much not a relationship they prefer friends with benefits/ situations without emotional connection. If you any one do want a emotional connection then dating a avoidant person is a bad idea. Anxious and avoidant people often attract each other. But there are situations where to 2 avoidant people date and there’s no emotional connection just friend vibes and space.
This is a good topic. From my experience 3-4 months is usually the time from from when things start to go down him. I’ve been on both sides. People start braking the boundary rules and force you into an ultimatum. You mess around and find a Badu box and mess your whole life up. She got all them men loyal to her till this day because they had that experience. It’s a dangerous game of Russian roulette. 🤣
This is not a relationship...its a contractual agreement...
I love this. I have two coexisting fwbs that imo works because, one is more on the friends side, we spend hours together kissing, cuddling, and hanging out but the sex isn't great (I enjoy it but.. ) and I would never want a relationship with him. The other is just a fbuddy, we never spend more than 45-60 min together, the sex is good/great but we never cuddle or hang out. And yeah, they both have good qualities but not for a relationship 😅
Great content. Fuck buddies is not my thing but what u share is really super interesting for me who don’t understand signs and is loose On boundaries. I fooled myself many times with guys who wanted only to be fuck buddies but we’re not being straight up about it. If a man touches my cervix is touching my heart thru vagus nerves, find that weird that only cuddle parts creates attachments. Any way, science don’t consider subtle bodies which they will one day hopefully. In esotericism and religion , it is known just penetrating someone creates energy untaglement and karmic soup. what matters is how cute u guys are and In love. U embody what u share with so much integrity that s amazing.
I agree with you in terms of the the heart connect. In these hyper sexual times I feel like and outlier .
@@lisaariottiart you’re not an outlier, you’re intelligent. I find it interesting a married couple is teaching be single and have a fwb. Instead of find a person in move into a union with them…
@Marie Baker fair enough
@Marie Baker Their marriage is not really "open" and has never been. They have the option to be with someone else, but since married neither have taken up on it.
@Marie Baker They've said that their relationship has been monogamous since they married and I'm going to stick with that.
The timing of this video!!!!! Shan I love youuuuuu 😭😫🥰🥰
It is self-manipulation for people to this do and it has a sad ending at end.
I just can’t do sex without after care. And I don’t need to have romantic attraction to cuddle.
Girl how do I even find one lol
That's the real question!!!!
You’re women. You control the access to sex.
I love yall so much omg yall are a huge part of why my current relationship is thriving. My partner and I also started off as friends with benefits and moving forward ive used alot of yalls advice and just modes of operating within ur relationship as a bit of a model for my own and its been such a huge contribution. I hope to meet yall some day like not even in a fanboy way entirely but just because I feel so aligned with you as people even though i only know what im seeing of you from your videos. All in all ive been following since before yall even got together and its been a beautiful experience to walk alongside in a way over the years im so excited to see whats to come. Yall are truly a blessing
I wanna' know how he found a woman to exclusively cuddle with? Yes "he". Shan had a dude playing a role I honestly thought was unrealistic for me. Is she an anomaly? How would I show I have the temperament for that? How and when do I say I want that? In the meantime I'll get started with saying it now.
Doesn't work for men.
How is this fun being with one guy and having to end quick because he leaves or you leave to cuddle with someone else 😢😢😢
Email, #Drdodoyi on UA-cam now for any disease or illness you suffering from. ua-cam.com/channels/sYxUef8ey3b3nfcP0acVww.html 🌀
Personally I think the cuddle second is a lie. Its a manipulation by her.
@@ruthsikorski5495 i know because if it was good you want to cuddle with the person you are with …nobody is totally happy alone you just cope with it.
Hmmm. I feeling something I’m not sure how to put in words.
The end was adorable .... I love to see it
God help you if you’re ever the cuddle guy lmaoo. You definitely not on your purpose if a woman can compartmentalize you into serving her needs instead of yours being met too.
Who says they aren't though? Maybe all he wants IS a cuddle.
Seeing this video, I believe I found my partner 5 years ago because of Shannon. Our relationship started so similar to Her + Jared’s.
Definitely a F-Buddy situation with clear consistent communication around how each of us felt about the sex and the connection. But it took us deciding to go on an impromptu road trip after months + months of only having a sexual connection - to find that we actually really liked one another and wanted to get a bit more serious.
I think watching Shan’s content help me truly realize what I wanted therefore attract the best partner for that time in my life and allowed it to organically grow into something more. 🥺🙌🏾💯
That's awesome
I’m having such a tough time with just hooking up. I can only sleep with someone I really like or see a relationship with and it makes me feel like a relationship junkie sometimes😂. I’m trying to just hookup to have fun to see if I can but it’s so difficult that I just haven’t at all. This is helping me a lot yo🧐thanks👍🏼. I’ll try it out and I’m hoping it’ll work🤔😂🤞.
The ending 🥺 love is so beautiful
This video dropped right in time 😅
And that outttrroooo song 🥵🥵🥵 🔥
Great video fr. Gotta Thank Aba and Preach for bringing me here
The flirting in the end 👀👀
Where was this video three months ago when i got back with my ex fuck buddy and got fucked ever worse the second time around?!
How did you get fucked over?
Thanks for having this conversation! I think it’s worth having (especially if you’re looking for something casual). I’m not sure if this will work for me, but I was curious to hear the tips (just in case)!
Mines texted me all day and took me on dates so confusing lol
Consciously Single & I love it here🥰🥰but Ion wanna get too comfortable eitha 🥴
I love these people! Helping us all love better!!! I support this couple 1000%
i love y’all chemistry & y’all definitely seemed to f after this video 😂
I thought these guys were married?
Idk how bro can sit here & let her basically say “I don’t like you i just wanna use you” & rub it in his face. I don’t feel like either are genuine, FWB catch feelings & eventually narcissistic traits start to pop out.
Well it can't be that bad since they're now married with one child and another on the way.
Y'all some interesting folks!!! Thank you for choosing to share cause y'all really ain't got to lol
As long as she ain't married - FWB works..cuz I feel bad for the dude. Otherwise, I enjoy the Fboy label, it's easy peezy in Sin City.
Looking stunning per usual, Shan 😍
My fwb always wants to cuddle or chill after sleep over. Discuss vulnerabilities smh . No boundaries whatsoever. And he fails to accept them now so I stopped
Wow, so interesting. At least you KNOW what you want right? Hope you get it
One can be loving without expecting anything or getting sth. from it though.
Open lines of communication, if you leave feeling less, do the work and check-in with yourself
Great video and really important tips. You both looked great! 🤩
but isn’t getting screwed by your fwb the point
Lolll what about how to marry your fxck buddy 😭🤣 I'm kidding. I don't even have sex.
I'm part of the consciously single because I don't think partnering is relevant or will add any value to my life 💀 like I'm single single I don't even kiss 🤣 I don't even have a talking phase 🤣 I'm sexually celibate 🤣
But I'm watching this just in case I change my mind 👀👀👀👀🤣
What a great video 😍 I love the insight from you both xx
Im on step 4. Ive walked away, damn he seemed like a good catch but guess not my catch
Friends with benefits never worked for me. Once I don’t feel jealous I just don’t have that much interest in the person and can easily get swept up by another person. Plus once I’ve settled with being fuck buddies and go find other partners then the fuck buddy gets jealous and seeks exclusivity. I prefer trying to make a connection. I want the sex and cuddling together lol. Maybe I’m Demi?
No .. you’re smart… this foolishness & will ultimately keep women single..,,
Nah im on the same boat to you as well, i'm a bit weirded out with the idea of being with someone i don't really care about, granted not necessarily the love of my life; but not even a slightest of care/connection? Nah
life's too short for that lmao
I love love love the raw honesty you guys have!!! Proud new subscriber!!!💚
I can relate with the sexual connection. It has been my experience that finding one person who has all elements I seek is very difficult. My required elements include, and are not limited to, sexual intimacy, intellectual conversations, physical & sexual chemistry, open-mindedness, willingness to travel & experience life together, and have a hustle mentality.
This is a great discussion
I enjoy shan because she is real and honest. I am learning from her to be comfortable enough with being honest
What about Sex becoming a Routine ? @ Boring Lifestyle !!!
He DEFINITELY stuck the landing on the water world analogy 😂😂😂😂😂😂💀
Watching this after reading Eva Illouz's "The End of Love" is fascinating and sobering.
Braids by BRADY 😍
Okay but how do you get the guy just to cuddle with? that's what I'm trying to have xD
Easy… one of the guys you leave on seen in your DMs …………
@Darius Doll *_me looking for the guys I've left on seen in my DM's_*
@@Tazziii correct
@@docdoll2583 That was sarcasm
20:04-20:14 You two💕😍 💞
Hi guys. Love your channel. I work in sound and just a suggestion. There are sennheiser clips that are very cheap and go on the lav. The clip I’m referring too eliminates the shuffling of the clothes and that makes it so you don’t have to see the mic. It can be taped to your chest and it would look way better.
Statistically on 15% of fwb turn into long-term relationships
Shan, you look stunning!
Don’t have one to begin with.
Agree but I'm nosey 🤣
Nah it’s possible !
@@Lafilledlapluie 😂😂
@@boricua584 sure it’s possible but why not go for guys who don’t just want to use you for your body. If that’s the kind of relationship you want and don’t care about emotions, then scratch whatever I say lol. Live life the way that makes you happy regardless of what others may think.
@@BeatzByMK That first part is like why not just … insert anything. Lol. If things were that simple then they would be done, but more importantly believe it or not some people don’t want that and do just want a friends with benefits etc, i was like that for a while and I found someone who I was cool with and who caused me 0 problems.
lol that ending was everything!! Do you guys need a room 😉😉
Yo, what is that song at the end? It's fire! Great video as always y'all!
First of I think Shane body was very selfish in the beginning and self seeking when it came to her current partner.The only reason she with him now because he eventually got better at whatever area he lacked in.On Jared he never left her cause she was the most beautiful woman he had and still has.My question is that would Shan body allow Jared to have relations with a much young partner and do what she did to him without guilt tripping him and also staying committed to him since she hurt him a lot.my question to Jared would be would you stay with her if you had found a much beautiful attractive woman.Thanks..not on any side just curious.
I love their honesty.