How did you feel about this topic? Any feedback? We collaborated with Patrick Teahan, a licensed independent clinical social worker and a childhood trauma specialist, to make this script possible (using his expertise on this topic). Be sure to check out his amazing UA-cam channel!🎉🎉
@Psych2go somtimes is dating a significant other who you loved but some things like homeless people living near where you live and that it was the sorta less time to meet your parents but You didn't want your significant other seeing poor people near where you live and then you feel sadness and anger that things or public places remind you of her so how you cope is isolating you self being exposed to the environment causes panic attacks Also if you wanted to date she wouldn't want you to cheat on her even though she's not there you you still feel chained to her somtimes it takes years for him to learn to let go of her And that she would like you to be Happy also she is a lawyer
Go watch some of Patrick's videos and read what he's posted under his community notes tab and you'll swear he's psychic. I'm a 55 year old childhood trauma and neglect survivor and he taught me more about myself from watching fifty or so of his videos than 40 years of therapists, self help books, and other assorted navel gazing.
Okay, I have chills because I can relate to all of these. Specifically whenever I talk about my trauma, I act very goofy and quirky and act like I don’t really care about the abuse and neglect I endured. I know that it’s serious but I tend to smile through it and act fine.
Same i clicked on the video thinking that sounds really interesting and fun, but i didn't expect to relate to point 1 and 3 so much and in parts point 5. 😅
I always start off with a laugh and saying, "I'm basically like Phoebe from Friends, so the only way forward after I say something about my past is to do a quick "Anyway..." and move on.
I have another one for you: the aggression supression Have you ever thought about why you're not angry or mad at someone or something even though it should be totally legit to feel anger towards in that certain situation? Instead you're rather sad or even totally fine with what happened? That may be a sign of supressing the emotion of anger, maybe because you don't ever want to experience yourself in an aggressive mode ever again because it might be hurtful to those around you in some way. This may come from verbal/physical abuse and being treated with mismanaged aggression during your upbringing of which you unconciously coped and adapted to the situation to not give your parents any point of doubt so they don't have any reason to be mad at you. Therefore you yourself won't be angry at any point because this would bring a reasoning of rebellion against your parents which might make them angry and causes more abuse. That may also be a trigger which leads you to develop a people pleaser trait. (Not a professional psychlogist here, just speaking of my own experience, I learned about recently after solving that trauma :) )
I sadly can relate to this: bottling up my negative emotions all the time because I know just how hurtful I can be with my words if I let myself "explode" I call it "volcanic suppression syndrome." I hope you've found a special someone to talk to about these emotions. You deserve to be heard, and you deserve to express those emotions.
the other day, like another person jump from my body and articulate some words to my boyfriend who hurt him. those words were in a sarcastic mockingly way. because i've not being taking seriously by him. so i jumped without any second to think and he was not talking to me for 2 days. instead of saying i'm sorry i doubled down and i said to him "so, you can say stuff like that to me but i cant?" and he was silent with me for those 2 days. i've been bottling up awful treatments so i exploded. and yes, i said that was hurtful but i wasn't being taken seriously. let's see if he do it again. im going to put my foot down.
@@EllaNonimato sometimes explosions consist of what we truly feel. Thing is, those explosions come out with brute force, regardless of the person being targeted. What we mean and feel comes out on the spot, without regret. You deserve to be heard; I woudn't feel bad for exploding at him ( I bet he took you seriously then ), but maybe you're a nicer person than I am. I've been hurt too much.
may I ask, how did you resolve that trauma? I had a fight with a friend (crush) because he did something immature that truly hurt me but I couldn't be mad at him. At the end, I told him I was mad but I actually wasn't. I just told him that bacause I wanted to respect my boundaries.
same, and for me it was paired with "what did i do?" and "maybe i should do more"... i should've been more careful with stuff when i was younger, because now everything is tiring.
Ah, that hits my core as a child. I would ask myself. Why am I the way I am? Why can I not have friends? I was diagnosed with autism at age 26. I was very confused about how I was. It's challenging.
Same. It's a question no kid should ever ask. I was always hyperactive and getting in trouble for it and unfortunately racism too. Being the only brown kid among white kids. I asked myself too often as a child...what is wrong with me?
Laughing through the pain is real, I just learned that. Friends and family usually can't believe what I survived when I tell them and they seem shocked when I just laugh it off. I started noticing it but never really looked into it, maybe because of fear or I just didn't have the need to do it, might look into it more. No toxic family trauma here, but it's also oddly specific. Great vid!
Schadenfreude and dark humor runs in my family, but I don't consider my own situation to be anything they caused... it's more like we handed down a coping mechanism for several different problems.
because we weren't been taken seriously by adults, and maybe ever. and when an adult do take us seriously and pay attention, we thought (or at least I do) that that person is a wimp not to be taken serious because we are worth nothing.
On the spot disassociation happens almost always when I’m in therapy. One time I was so far removed in my head that when my therapist asked what I’d say to my inner child if she was sitting beside me my self-loathing aggressively came out to the surface and I barked that “She should’ve gotten beat more”. I was also unaware that laughing through the pain is a childhood trauma response, but your family profile was pretty spot on. Highly caustic, sarcastic, withheld love, dismissed emotions and sensitivity with physical aggression and attacks sprinkled in for some “fun” bits. Like rainbow sprinkles on Ice Cream!
"Laughing through the pain." This is something I've seen from several comedians who passed due to suicide, the most note-worthy example being Robin Williams. It's ironic how some of the happiest people can sometimes harbor the deepest levels of pain
The "Refrigerator Buzz" is right on. Only in the last few years did my therapist and I realize that I likely experienced (at least) mild depression since I was 9 (after my mom died), long before my severe adolescent episode at 15. That explains so much of the aches and pains I was always very aware of, along with irritability (often seen in pediatric depression instead of depressed mood or anhedonia), and issues with sleep.
Having been through childhood trauma myself, I’ve always been stifled from expressing myself or confronting someone if I was ever wronged. This has had a lasting impact on me to where if someone ever does something wrong to me. I want to confront them and have my say, but something keeps holding me back like an invisible barrier. It’s really frustrating because I know what I want to say and express myself fully, but I end up like a deer in headlights, drowning in silence. Perhaps, it’s the fear of the unknown, fear of confrontation, or simply the fear of being vulnerable.
I act like I'll be too busy or unbothered to argue but honestly it's my childhood trauma. Nobody listened so to counter that I'll be acting like what the other person said didn't get to me. Make a video on this please I'm trapped in an endless cycle.🙏
Emotional delay and on the spot disassociation are so relatable. The emotional delay I actually thought was just due to me being oblivious or people pleasing, but it makes so much more sense that I do it because I wasn't allowed to say no or be annoyed/hurt by being taken advantage of as a kid. If I was "asked" to do something, it wasn’t a request - it was a demand. As for the on the spot disassociation, I spent so much time feeling like I was under a microscope, and I wasn't allowed to have my own opinions for so long, that it makes a lot of sense that now having my own thoughts and opinions feels unsafe. I'm going to have to sit with this and do some journaling 😅
That refrigerator buzz depression one really hit close, since for the longest time, all these years, I’ve been feeling as if everything is alright, and nothing is wrong and I’m living a stable life, until these recent years where I’m just starting realise how messed up my childhood really was, to the point I start doubting myself whether it was real or I’m just exaggerating its effect.
So, I’m very aware of one of many forms of trauma I have. “Laughing through the pain” is one of them. As a kid, my sister and I were neglected for my parents drinking and smoking addictions. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day about my father, and the abuses and neglect I endured from him, he stared at me with disgust, and asked “how could you talk to casually about something so horrifying, Luci?” (Luci isn’t my irl name). I never felt so ashamed of myself.
It wasn't disgust directed at you, it was directed at the horrible things you went thru, and the people that inflicted so much pain on you! You talking about it casually is a coping mechanism. We try to minimise it and tell ourselves it wasn't that bad, to cope better. Also, experiencing horrible things on a regular basis makes it start feeling like a normal occurrence, because we don't know any better, especially as children. You should never feel shame for being an innocent victim. People that get hit by cars, get sh*t or st*bbed don't feel ashamed, why would you feel shame for being attacked when you were an innocent, defenseless child? Sending ❤
Speaking openly about traumatic experiences can be triggering for others to hear, especially if they are not emotionally well regulated, emotionally mature and who may also have their own past traumas, emotional neglect in their past. I've learnt to choose carefully, be more discerning about who is safe, supportive to be vulnerable with. Also Peter Levine talks about "pendulating" in and out of traumatic past experiences when talking about them to protect yourself from overwhelm, dissociation or emotional dysregulation and gently learn to process the feelings the memories bring up through gradual exposure. It helps if you can afford to have a psychotherapist witness this process or a supportive friend who can contain the feelings without blaming or shaming, instead sees you not for what happened to you but for the trustworthy and wonderful person you really are
I've been following Patrick's work for a while now, I have found it so helpful in helping me understand my childhood trauma and to heal from it. This video hit me right in the feels because I relate to all of it. Sending peace to everyone else who did too.
That last one hits the spot for me. Every time i talk about my childhood i am way too casual. I'm personally like, it is what it is, but others dont understand how i'm so casual because for them its usually one hell of a traumatic story. I don't understand why people care, no one else ever did. I have made my peace with my past, so its hard to understand for me why people want to show compassion for shit that happened years ago.
I think of it like, if you had a nice car and then lost it, it's a lot more of a bummer than if you never had a nice car to begin with. We never had any better experience, so we aren't plagued by memories of better days. I get a little melancholy, but not nearly as upset as someone who had experiences with great parents and then experienced abuse. As I find healthier and healthier relationships, I can see it a little more clearly and my responses to trauma stories are slowly starting to look like other People's.
@@steggopotamus funnily enough 2 days ago was mentally kind of hard to deal with because of what happened years ago, and then when i told my story to someone i saw the look on his face and actually truly realised how fucked up it is. I feel like im uncovering shit i buried a long time ago. I guess this is what it feels like to grow emotionally lol
I was always shy at most and a bit insecure about both my liking and my face, especially at school since i was still young. I did always suffer from rejection from other kids (like isolated) before the pandemic. During the pandemic of covid i felt better so i wasn’t forced to go out but when i had to for like shopping at the grocery store i felt even more insecure than before with the less contact i made. After months of mostly wanted isolation from public, school returned, as my anxiety had gotten worst i used the pandemic to keep a mask on all time and stopped eating at lunch during school since i did not want to take my mask off at all cost. this continued for years. there was always mean comments coming with it, i ignored it, even if it did hurt somehow. the more time pass the more sick i get, while also trying to stay indoors as much as possible causing my inevitable failure in my school year. when came the exams, either i could not talk in front of the class without crying or panicking and failing to fill up a test paper. this got worst as the time went on i was so sick that i could barely get out of my bed. i had to get many tests but until it was discovered that it was all in my head only because i feared people judgement so much. but all of this is literally a anime character backstory impossible to say it all. if this get attention i will say more, honestly i’m both tired and simply lazy, i’m writing this at night so…
The first thing is so relatable to me. I hate myself for giving mixed signals and I'm trying to work on it. It helps to know where it comes from so thank you for that.❤
I definitely relate to the last one. I just want to say that for everyone who has to go through childhood trauma and the like, don’t give up and just keep going forward. It will work out for you if you don’t give up on yourself 🙏🏼
This format is going to be a good way to connect with younger people. My teenage daughter is triggered by adult therapists talking about trauma and so she often turns to TikTok for her mental health info.
This just explained a lot of stuff about me especially the one with tiredness trigger because i think it explains why sometimes i stay up so so late alot. Thank you so much pysch2go. Your videos are amazing and very helpful in my long journey to recovery
Yes childhood trauma comes back to you in adulthood I got really rude at the cashier at the grocery store they told me I had to bag my groceries "I'm the customer" customer is always right that's what baggers are for that work at the store didn't mean to be a " A" hole 😢
I can relate to everything..it's hard to talk about but when I do people look at me in disbelief. This is because my family is good at covering. Only the ones who truly want to listen are the ones who treat me like a delicate flower. They can't believe that I went through all that and I'm still here. It is a miracle that I am. I have many physical health issues on top of everything else. It's been a rough life but I am doing my best to get to the other side where I no longer feel these responses as deep.
Why did a tear up when real Patrick came on at the end? Its like a big brother appearing at just the right moment. This is a fantastic collaboration, thank you both.
It's weird, because a lot of people on this video talk about having that problem of laughing and acting ok about past trauma, but for me I only seem to smile awkwardly, yet still acknowledge that it was not a good time for me. Then again, there were lots of things I picked up from abuse when I was younger, and maybe me smiling is the result of feeling too insecure to express how sad or embarressed I actually am about it.
Timestamps 1). Emotional delay 0:41 2). Refrigerator buzz depression 1:45 3). Being tired is a trigger 2:49 4). On-the-stop disassociation 3:52 5). Laughing through the pain 4:49 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I didn't expect all of these to be trauma responses lol. i've always experienced and struggled with all of these in my life, and it confused me so much. growing up in a somewhat toxic family with parents having history of abuse themselves, i've been just led to believe it's due to me being "weak, pathetic, soft or immature", and i further believed this because i grew up with the perception that crying and any sort of softness is a sign of weakness and it's bad., so i just kept laughing and sarcastically playing everything off, just to show that i'm "strong". (which only served to further worsen and detach myself from everything :p) it's only after learning more about mental health after falling into a very deep depression did i just realize, "well, that was effed up... they shouldn't have told me that"
Yep, I was the guy shocking everyone with my “funny” childhood stories. Doing therapy now and still trying to process everything. For anybody going through anything like this, stay strong, it will get better with time. If you feel ready, start doing some therapy. Stay safe!
I have Functional Neurological Disorder which psychological features the dissociation elements and delayed emotions that impact me a lot. It’s very complex and I’m tired all the time 😞
Thank you so much for making this video. every single thing in this entire video hits too close to home. Thank you for making me feel seen. To anyone out there who can relate to this, know you're not alone.
I recently told my parent that I have been having extreme suicidal thoughts, like at school someone was spreading rumors about me and I was constantly judged and started crying and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t want to dealt with this pain and wanted to just end my life. I recently found out the person who started the rumor was one of my friends, which has displaced my trust by a mile. And I am going to leave that school this month as I have figured out that even my own friends are toxic jerks that took advantage of me, and I noticed this over the years and just looked it over, but now I can’t handle it.
the fact that i clicked on this video and even related to more than one point just confirms what i already knew: that i'm ODD hhhh, yes pun intended, but that laughter was prolly just proof of the last point lol, double-edged sword right there :p
Very often when I am tired I am getting suicidal thoughts and see no reason to live. For example sometimes when I am so tired and exhausted, mostly emotionally I get physically tired too and think about never wanting to have kids, or not wanting to work anymore or just thinking that I cant take myself anymore and want to be gone. Thats such a strange feeling tbh…
I have been "isolated" to a degree due to a serious allergy i have by my mom. This has kept me from really socializing and doing this most people have. She also had a serious medical issue herself she got from when I was born. Now that I'm 13 I started to realize how depressed I was and just lived with it and stopped caring. It seems I should un-plug the refrigerator.
That last one really makes me think of my mother. She obviously grew up in a very toxic family of alcoholics and manic depressive narcissists. My mother was left behind at some store by her mother when she was like 6 and ended up walking home after a very reasonable for an abandoned 6 year old panic attack. When she got home her mother brushed it all off and said that she thought my mother had already walked home on her own and that was why she left and seemed to barely be happy that her daughter made it home and was safe. Her father almost certainly also did emotional incest with my mother and her sister. He started with my mother, since she was the oldest and then switched to my Aunt, the youngest. Just a bunch of weird sympathetic narcissism going on. My dad's dad abandoned his mother and she married and then remained when her first husband passed away. He also studied animal psychology before dropping out to work on the rail road. I often felt somewhat exposed to the concepts presented in psychology but it wasn't until my grandparents passed away that many stories of their abuse and neglect started to come out. It was then that I started to look inward and saw all of the mental illness as almost being by the book. it was around at that point that I realized that I was probably manic depressive but have been to afraid too look further and too poor to do much about it. I used to think my mood swings were just how emotions worked but when I realized that I was often more down than I was up and I was often chasing the high of simply staying up late all the time that I realized that I was reinforcing my depressive cycles with my manic ones. I haven't been diagnosed but my behavior is so close to certain manic depressive examples that I've tried to explore some of the solutions to mania driven depression. For one I try to chase that high less and less and I've learned what I pay for when I get the high of being up until 4am for the 20th day in a row. By simply going to bed earlier and stimulating myself less at night I find that I start looking forward to the morning and the next day more. The fact that I can feel so profoundly different from simply challenging some of my subconscious assumptions has been encouraging and makes me feel like I'm on the correct path. The martial art Aikido has also done much to give me a way to contact and communicate with my emotional core in a way that I never had before. I used to be more emotionally disconnected but something internally welds together after you've been thrown around like a sack of flower for the 1000th time. If I were to describe Aikido in a psychologically reliant way, Aikido is a very safe and pro-social environment to allow you to confront your own self in a structured, safe and encouraging environment. For me it was a form of exposure therapy for social and performance anxiety. It's also fun and intricate and repetitive. So I could see how many people with things like OCD, PTSD and possibly autism might benefit from it. The exercise is brisk but otherwise mild and it, along with the socialization and human contact are powerful antidepressants on their own. Aikido is somehow simultaneously gentle and spirited. For me it was maybe even a type of secular church.
wow--one popped up again last night, leading to a ridiculous argument with my beloved spouse. And then the delayed feelings took over. Whew. I'm back in my body this morning. Thanks for this.
Everyone's feelings and experiences are valid, especially when it comes to past traumas. It's important to acknowledge that whatever emotions arise from difficult experiences are completely normal. Remember, you're not alone in facing challenges. Also, it's essential to respect others' privacy and avoid gossiping or sharing personal details about anyone's experiences without their permission. Respecting boundaries creates a supportive environment where everyone can heal and grow.
thanks for great video! It helps me to figure out how I made my characteristic things. I've always thought I have depression at the base. And laughing off my traumas, too.
Thank you for educating on trauma. I love to learn about it. It’s a sensitive topic and can help understanding better. It also helps me to reflect on my own experiences and family dynamics. But also helps understanding things I didn’t know. The videos help for sure. Thank you ❤
I wasn't ready to watch this video. I wanted to but I needed time before open it, and still hurt when I remember my childhood. My inner child comes to cry sometimes and asking for a hug, a hug I didn't receive in the past and now have to do to myself. My parents wasn't ready for a kid, not how they should be. In the end I was an experience, a product to be better version of his parents with excessive expectations but also overprotective parents. I couldn't develop communication because if I wanted to do something it have to be on his control and watch. I became a person who cannot maintain a relationship for long time because of that, with no perspective of life, zero interest in the future just working all days and make money and asking to hit by a truck, because I even could do this by myself. I'm a failure and the pain never disappear, I just ask to my sister have a better life.
Being tired is a HUGE trigger for my anxiety. I just get super emotional whenever I have to do things. This is a reason why I take a shower and exercise in the morning. It gets me going.
Very helpful in a gentle way❣️ Being seen and heard properly is so hard for childhood trauma survivors but crucial to real recovery as adults- Great to see a collab with Patrick ( you look adorable) who is so very helpful 🥰
I vividly remember the day I realized how much I relied on laughter and joking to hide and avoid my inner turmoil. It was the first time in my entire life I went to a counselor. I confessed that I had been struggling with suicidal thoughts. My immediate response to verbalizing my struggles was to smile and laugh it off, so I did. When the counselor simply gave me a sympathetic look and nodded without saying anything, letting me linger in my own desperate attempts to distract my thoughts, it made me realize “oh…this is for real…I’m genuinely not okay…this isn’t a joke anymore…” My chest honestly aches when I think back to that very moment. When my shaky, nervous giggles turned into small sobs. Until that very moment, I thought that stuff only happened in the movies.
Yaaaass!!! Love this collab with Patrick! Gosh this hit all the top notes. 😭😭😭Just when I thought I knew all the signs I learn more. Thank you for putting this gem together.
I related heavily to the last one. I would talk with my former coworkers and I learned that a lot of what I’ve been through was actually not normal. Though I wouldn’t joke about it or anything, just didn’t have the grasp yet of “hey. That’s not normal”
I laugh through my trauma, but I am highly aware of it (I dont go through therapy the max I've ever done is spoken to my school counselor about it). I just don't like serious conversations because they make me uncomfortable and force me to actually accept the fact that it is serious. Also, if I laugh it off, it tricks my body into not crying while talking about it. It also makes it a feel a bit more lighthearted especially when I'm texting, so it doesn't make the conversation feel like it is so serious because then it puts the spotlight on me. As much as I love ranting, making it seem like the topic is all about me makes me feel selfish which is exactly how I'm feeling while writing this. (It sounds confusing but whatever) I am a teenager and have been dealing with a psychologically abusive dad for years. Insults, yelling, blah blah blah. You get the point. I've always had thoughts where I think I'm being overdramatic, or it isn't that serious because I figured out my father was abusive pretty young (Somewhere around 7 to 10 years old). While I have no idea whether my siblings are aware of it especially since one of them looks up to my dad. Which makes sense because they are young but when no one else that is experiencing the abuse is mentioning it, even my own mother, it starts to make me question it. My grandma's and friends reassure me whenever I tell them about it or when I tell people in general about it, but I still question it. He doesn't usually get physical. The max he has ever done was almost punch me, but he stopped himself (He is ex-military so it would have hurt like a motherfucker if he went through with it). Which was terrifying, but I wasn't completely not expecting it. He says he doesn't remember it which, for almost a week, made me think I was crazy, but I remembered that my siblings remembers that day. Another story is when he had grabbed me and like tossed me in my room. Those were the only times other than when I was like 9 and younger when he used to smack me and my siblings on the back of the head (on that one nerve) as a punishment for stupid mistakes kids would make. Now, whether that is physical abuse, I haven't got a clue since some people say that getting smacked as a kid is normal and others say it isn't. But I do know that I am abused. (If you want some context or more story's just ask)
Yeah, unfortunately I relate to almost all of them. I am already taking EMDR for trauma, but I am still stuck in the same environment. My trauma is related to my parents being perfectionists (one of them being a narc) and me being undiagnosed with aspergers at the time (having weird behaviour that they didn't like).
refrigerator buzz depression is so real. im an only child and have always been alone until one day no trigger at all i just realise "damn, im lonely as shit. my life sucks" plus i live with one parent my entire life and even so she was always very busy during my childhood.
I frequently speak of my traumatic brain injury in humorous terms-- not because my family was toxic or invalidating (they're actually close to ideal), but because I don't know how to process something that I didn't exactly experience. Of course I did experience it, but my memory was damaged to the point that I have missing or altered memories, especially in connection with that crash, & I was comatose for multiple weeks so there's a huge gap that can only be filled with dreams of not being able to wake up. That doesn't invalidate the many people for whom toxic families are the reason, though I do want to point out that it can happen even to us who have amazing, positive families.
One good thing to remember is, some peoples trauma might seem like a little issue at most for you. People can feel different ways about something, and can be hurt much more by something you can brush off
Ok, let's real real here for a min. Recently, my parents have been very controlling of me. From what I do, when I do it, etc. I barely have a social life. And the only time when I can.saying something on something is when I have my phone at school. I'm 17 and getting close to graduating. My parents have been quite literally forcing me to do my studies. They even taken away many of my stuff, so I'm forced to be on my school chromebook to work. There are days where I'm up to 7 at night, and then have an hour to get ready for bed. I don't get my phone, my personal laptop, my Switch, or even my TV. And now, they're checking my lunchbox. I'm only allowed to take a sandwich and two Cliff bars for when I'm done with PE at school. My daily schedule kinda looks like this: Wake up Get ready for school(eat, get dresses, etc) School Go home Unpack Study Feed animals and have dinner Study Get ready for bed (shower, make bed, etc) Sleep. So, is this healthy or my parents being very toxic towards me
Also, I'm a very sticky person. I might be wrong, but I think this is part of my childhood trauma. And yes, this is a thing that has been happening for years now.
I get "On the spot disassociation" all the time. I always feel like my parents are ordering me to do things I don't want to when they're just giving me friendly advice. I may have done the "Laughing through the pain" thing yesterday. I made sure my managers knew that I missed work last Friday because I went to the hospital to get a stuck piece of steak out of my esophagus. While I acted like I was fine, they reacted like I was telling them I choked and almost died.
The laughing through the pain type trauma maybe me really think about the abuse I went through with my former in college.. i found it relatable and it's kinda bitter sweet in a way.. because even though it happened years ago and I've moved on.. the thoughts still haunt me a little..
4:16 I one time presented something in front of my class and teacher and suddenly I couldnt hear anything but a ring noise anymore, not my voice or my teachers voice. I felt dizzy and asked to sit down so yeah, said I just didnt drink enough that day ✌
I have so many traumas but i dont know how to overcome them. So many of them are because of my family (especially my father). The biggest impact of them is i lost my trust to people. I feel panic attacks when trying to socialize with people. And i am alone because of this. I wish i could speak like others without feeling fear and anxiety. Your videos helps me to understand myself. I know that i have to accept my feelings and move on. But i feel very exhausted and old for my age.
How did you feel about this topic? Any feedback? We collaborated with Patrick Teahan, a licensed independent clinical social worker and a childhood trauma specialist, to make this script possible (using his expertise on this topic). Be sure to check out his amazing UA-cam channel!🎉🎉
It was a good video. V informational.
love
why i have all them
It hurts
He is fantastic!
0:43 Emotional delay
1:47 Refrigerator buzz depression
2:52 Being tired is a trigger
3:53 on-the-spot disassociation
4:51 laughing through the pain
Thank you!❤
@Psych2go somtimes is dating a significant other who you loved but some things like homeless people living near where you live and that it was the sorta less time to meet your parents but
You didn't want your significant other seeing poor people near where you live and then you feel sadness and anger that things or public places remind you of her so how you cope is isolating you self being exposed to the environment causes panic attacks
Also if you wanted to date she wouldn't want you to cheat on her even though she's not there you you still feel chained to her somtimes it takes years for him to learn to let go of her
And that she would like you to be Happy also she is a lawyer
@@lawrupwhat?🤔
Laughing through the pain is me…
why is this so realistic? I swear yall got cameras on me.
it's simple psychologi
dude i'm a do-
Fr tho 💀
Patrick Teahan is a gem
Go watch some of Patrick's videos and read what he's posted under his community notes tab and you'll swear he's psychic. I'm a 55 year old childhood trauma and neglect survivor and he taught me more about myself from watching fifty or so of his videos than 40 years of therapists, self help books, and other assorted navel gazing.
Honored to be part of! Thanks Psych2Go!
heyy i love your channel (and psych2go of course)
Thank you, for your wonderful channel!
Okay, I have chills because I can relate to all of these.
Specifically whenever I talk about my trauma, I act very goofy and quirky and act like I don’t really care about the abuse and neglect I endured. I know that it’s serious but I tend to smile through it and act fine.
We’re happy the video resonated, thank you for watching🥰
Same, smiling awkwardly. That's masking
Same i clicked on the video thinking that sounds really interesting and fun, but i didn't expect to relate to point 1 and 3 so much and in parts point 5. 😅
I always start off with a laugh and saying, "I'm basically like Phoebe from Friends, so the only way forward after I say something about my past is to do a quick "Anyway..." and move on.
Same here when I talk about my problems. I don’t want to sound like a big whiner.
I have another one for you: the aggression supression
Have you ever thought about why you're not angry or mad at someone or something even though it should be totally legit to feel anger towards in that certain situation? Instead you're rather sad or even totally fine with what happened? That may be a sign of supressing the emotion of anger, maybe because you don't ever want to experience yourself in an aggressive mode ever again because it might be hurtful to those around you in some way.
This may come from verbal/physical abuse and being treated with mismanaged aggression during your upbringing of which you unconciously coped and adapted to the situation to not give your parents any point of doubt so they don't have any reason to be mad at you. Therefore you yourself won't be angry at any point because this would bring a reasoning of rebellion against your parents which might make them angry and causes more abuse.
That may also be a trigger which leads you to develop a people pleaser trait.
(Not a professional psychlogist here, just speaking of my own experience, I learned about recently after solving that trauma :) )
I sadly can relate to this: bottling up my negative emotions all the time because I know just how hurtful I can be with my words if I let myself "explode" I call it "volcanic suppression syndrome."
I hope you've found a special someone to talk to about these emotions. You deserve to be heard, and you deserve to express those emotions.
the other day, like another person jump from my body and articulate some words to my boyfriend who hurt him. those words were in a sarcastic mockingly way.
because i've not being taking seriously by him. so i jumped without any second to think and he was not talking to me for 2 days.
instead of saying i'm sorry i doubled down and i said to him "so, you can say stuff like that to me but i cant?" and he was silent with me for those 2 days.
i've been bottling up awful treatments so i exploded. and yes, i said that was hurtful but i wasn't being taken seriously. let's see if he do it again. im going to put my foot down.
You are spot on. I never get angry anymore. Just disheartened.
@@EllaNonimato sometimes explosions consist of what we truly feel. Thing is, those explosions come out with brute force, regardless of the person being targeted. What we mean and feel comes out on the spot, without regret. You deserve to be heard; I woudn't feel bad for exploding at him ( I bet he took you seriously then ), but maybe you're a nicer person than I am. I've been hurt too much.
may I ask, how did you resolve that trauma?
I had a fight with a friend (crush) because he did something immature that truly hurt me but I couldn't be mad at him. At the end, I told him I was mad but I actually wasn't. I just told him that bacause I wanted to respect my boundaries.
I remember asking the empty air when I was a kid, “what’s wrong with me?”
same, and for me it was paired with "what did i do?" and "maybe i should do more"... i should've been more careful with stuff when i was younger, because now everything is tiring.
Ah, that hits my core as a child. I would ask myself. Why am I the way I am? Why can I not have friends?
I was diagnosed with autism at age 26. I was very confused about how I was. It's challenging.
Same. It's a question no kid should ever ask. I was always hyperactive and getting in trouble for it and unfortunately racism too. Being the only brown kid among white kids. I asked myself too often as a child...what is wrong with me?
I still do.Im still a kid.I shouldn't have trauma though.
❤
Laughing through the pain is real, I just learned that. Friends and family usually can't believe what I survived when I tell them and they seem shocked when I just laugh it off. I started noticing it but never really looked into it, maybe because of fear or I just didn't have the need to do it, might look into it more. No toxic family trauma here, but it's also oddly specific. Great vid!
Schadenfreude and dark humor runs in my family, but I don't consider my own situation to be anything they caused... it's more like we handed down a coping mechanism for several different problems.
because we weren't been taken seriously by adults, and maybe ever. and when an adult do take us seriously and pay attention, we thought (or at least I do) that that person is a wimp not to be taken serious because we are worth nothing.
You might not have family trauma, but you learned somewhere to distance yourself from emotions. Definitely work that out if you're not already.
Patrick is an incredible resource for information. He understands first-hand the challenges of healing from childhood trauma.
On the spot disassociation happens almost always when I’m in therapy. One time I was so far removed in my head that when my therapist asked what I’d say to my inner child if she was sitting beside me my self-loathing aggressively came out to the surface and I barked that “She should’ve gotten beat more”.
I was also unaware that laughing through the pain is a childhood trauma response, but your family profile was pretty spot on. Highly caustic, sarcastic, withheld love, dismissed emotions and sensitivity with physical aggression and attacks sprinkled in for some “fun” bits. Like rainbow sprinkles on Ice Cream!
"Laughing through the pain."
This is something I've seen from several comedians who passed due to suicide, the most note-worthy example being Robin Williams. It's ironic how some of the happiest people can sometimes harbor the deepest levels of pain
Popping in to say I am thrilled you collaborated with Patrick Teehan. I found his family roleplays especially helpful.
I thought these sounded familiar! I read the description because of your comment and that's so neat!
The "Refrigerator Buzz" is right on. Only in the last few years did my therapist and I realize that I likely experienced (at least) mild depression since I was 9 (after my mom died), long before my severe adolescent episode at 15. That explains so much of the aches and pains I was always very aware of, along with irritability (often seen in pediatric depression instead of depressed mood or anhedonia), and issues with sleep.
Having been through childhood trauma myself, I’ve always been stifled from expressing myself or confronting someone if I was ever wronged. This has had a lasting impact on me to where if someone ever does something wrong to me. I want to confront them and have my say, but something keeps holding me back like an invisible barrier. It’s really frustrating because I know what I want to say and express myself fully, but I end up like a deer in headlights, drowning in silence. Perhaps, it’s the fear of the unknown, fear of confrontation, or simply the fear of being vulnerable.
Did you find this video helpful? Did any of these specific responses resonate?
Amen
I feel you.
Same here 😞
I act like I'll be too busy or unbothered to argue but honestly it's my childhood trauma. Nobody listened so to counter that I'll be acting like what the other person said didn't get to me.
Make a video on this please I'm trapped in an endless cycle.🙏
Emotional delay and on the spot disassociation are so relatable. The emotional delay I actually thought was just due to me being oblivious or people pleasing, but it makes so much more sense that I do it because I wasn't allowed to say no or be annoyed/hurt by being taken advantage of as a kid. If I was "asked" to do something, it wasn’t a request - it was a demand.
As for the on the spot disassociation, I spent so much time feeling like I was under a microscope, and I wasn't allowed to have my own opinions for so long, that it makes a lot of sense that now having my own thoughts and opinions feels unsafe. I'm going to have to sit with this and do some journaling 😅
Me: sees the title
Me: leaves baking cookies and gets my butt over here straight away LOL
Well, how were the cookies?
@@MaxGamer07wastaken great
That refrigerator buzz depression one really hit close, since for the longest time, all these years, I’ve been feeling as if everything is alright, and nothing is wrong and I’m living a stable life, until these recent years where I’m just starting realise how messed up my childhood really was, to the point I start doubting myself whether it was real or I’m just exaggerating its effect.
So, I’m very aware of one of many forms of trauma I have. “Laughing through the pain” is one of them. As a kid, my sister and I were neglected for my parents drinking and smoking addictions. I was talking to a friend of mine the other day about my father, and the abuses and neglect I endured from him, he stared at me with disgust, and asked “how could you talk to casually about something so horrifying, Luci?” (Luci isn’t my irl name). I never felt so ashamed of myself.
It wasn't disgust directed at you, it was directed at the horrible things you went thru, and the people that inflicted so much pain on you! You talking about it casually is a coping mechanism. We try to minimise it and tell ourselves it wasn't that bad, to cope better. Also, experiencing horrible things on a regular basis makes it start feeling like a normal occurrence, because we don't know any better, especially as children. You should never feel shame for being an innocent victim. People that get hit by cars, get sh*t or st*bbed don't feel ashamed, why would you feel shame for being attacked when you were an innocent, defenseless child? Sending ❤
Speaking openly about traumatic experiences can be triggering for others to hear, especially if they are not emotionally well regulated, emotionally mature and who may also have their own past traumas, emotional neglect in their past. I've learnt to choose carefully, be more discerning about who is safe, supportive to be vulnerable with. Also Peter Levine talks about "pendulating" in and out of traumatic past experiences when talking about them to protect yourself from overwhelm, dissociation or emotional dysregulation and gently learn to process the feelings the memories bring up through gradual exposure. It helps if you can afford to have a psychotherapist witness this process or a supportive friend who can contain the feelings without blaming or shaming, instead sees you not for what happened to you but for the trustworthy and wonderful person you really are
@@jasfra I wasn’t speaking openly about it- he asked me about my childhood, knowing it’s probably traumatic- I responded
I've been following Patrick's work for a while now, I have found it so helpful in helping me understand my childhood trauma and to heal from it. This video hit me right in the feels because I relate to all of it. Sending peace to everyone else who did too.
That last one hits the spot for me. Every time i talk about my childhood i am way too casual. I'm personally like, it is what it is, but others dont understand how i'm so casual because for them its usually one hell of a traumatic story. I don't understand why people care, no one else ever did. I have made my peace with my past, so its hard to understand for me why people want to show compassion for shit that happened years ago.
I think of it like, if you had a nice car and then lost it, it's a lot more of a bummer than if you never had a nice car to begin with. We never had any better experience, so we aren't plagued by memories of better days. I get a little melancholy, but not nearly as upset as someone who had experiences with great parents and then experienced abuse.
As I find healthier and healthier relationships, I can see it a little more clearly and my responses to trauma stories are slowly starting to look like other People's.
@@steggopotamus funnily enough 2 days ago was mentally kind of hard to deal with because of what happened years ago, and then when i told my story to someone i saw the look on his face and actually truly realised how fucked up it is. I feel like im uncovering shit i buried a long time ago. I guess this is what it feels like to grow emotionally lol
Patrick Teahan is like a living Mister Rodgers for everyone. He has done AMAZING work. He has a UA-cam channel, which I think people should explore.
I was always shy at most and a bit insecure about both my liking and my face, especially at school since i was still young.
I did always suffer from rejection from other kids (like isolated) before the pandemic.
During the pandemic of covid i felt better so i wasn’t forced to go out but when i had to for like shopping at the grocery store i felt even more insecure than before with the less contact i made.
After months of mostly wanted isolation from public, school returned, as my anxiety had gotten worst i used the pandemic to keep a mask on all time and stopped eating at lunch during school since i did not want to take my mask off at all cost.
this continued for years.
there was always mean comments coming with it, i ignored it, even if it did hurt somehow.
the more time pass the more sick i get, while also trying to stay indoors as much as possible causing my inevitable failure in my school year.
when came the exams, either i could not talk in front of the class without crying or panicking and failing to fill up a test paper.
this got worst as the time went on i was so sick that i could barely get out of my bed.
i had to get many tests but until it was discovered that it was all in my head only because i feared people judgement so much.
but all of this is literally a anime character backstory impossible to say it all.
if this get attention i will say more, honestly i’m both tired and simply lazy, i’m writing this at night so…
The first thing is so relatable to me. I hate myself for giving mixed signals and I'm trying to work on it. It helps to know where it comes from so thank you for that.❤
I love Patrick Teehan 😭 He's helped me so much
Patrick Teahan is one of the BEST specialists in childhood trauma on UA-cam!
I definitely relate to the last one. I just want to say that for everyone who has to go through childhood trauma and the like, don’t give up and just keep going forward. It will work out for you if you don’t give up on yourself 🙏🏼
This format is going to be a good way to connect with younger people. My teenage daughter is triggered by adult therapists talking about trauma and so she often turns to TikTok for her mental health info.
As someone that is starting to realize that I am deeply scarred by childhood traumas and emotional neglect, some of these hits home
This just explained a lot of stuff about me especially the one with tiredness trigger because i think it explains why sometimes i stay up so so late alot. Thank you so much pysch2go. Your videos are amazing and very helpful in my long journey to recovery
Yes childhood trauma comes back to you in adulthood I got really rude at the cashier at the grocery store they told me I had to bag my groceries "I'm the customer" customer is always right that's what baggers are for that work at the store didn't mean to be a " A" hole 😢
I can relate to everything..it's hard to talk about but when I do people look at me in disbelief. This is because my family is good at covering. Only the ones who truly want to listen are the ones who treat me like a delicate flower. They can't believe that I went through all that and I'm still here. It is a miracle that I am. I have many physical health issues on top of everything else. It's been a rough life but I am doing my best to get to the other side where I no longer feel these responses as deep.
Why did a tear up when real Patrick came on at the end? Its like a big brother appearing at just the right moment. This is a fantastic collaboration, thank you both.
This video explains me how I feel all the time my childhood trauma always just creeps up on me
It's weird, because a lot of people on this video talk about having that problem of laughing and acting ok about past trauma, but for me I only seem to smile awkwardly, yet still acknowledge that it was not a good time for me. Then again, there were lots of things I picked up from abuse when I was younger, and maybe me smiling is the result of feeling too insecure to express how sad or embarressed I actually am about it.
Timestamps
1). Emotional delay 0:41
2). Refrigerator buzz depression 1:45
3). Being tired is a trigger 2:49
4). On-the-stop disassociation 3:52
5). Laughing through the pain 4:49
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I didn't expect all of these to be trauma responses lol.
i've always experienced and struggled with all of these in my life, and it confused me so much.
growing up in a somewhat toxic family with parents having history of abuse themselves,
i've been just led to believe it's due to me being "weak, pathetic, soft or immature", and i further believed this because i grew up with the perception that crying and any sort of softness
is a sign of weakness and it's bad.,
so i just kept laughing and sarcastically playing everything off, just to show that i'm "strong".
(which only served to further worsen and detach myself from everything :p)
it's only after learning more about mental health after falling into a very deep depression did i just realize, "well, that was effed up... they shouldn't have told me that"
The laughing through the pain one got me fucked up cuz i do that without noticing. Very informative video.
Yep, I was the guy shocking everyone with my “funny” childhood stories. Doing therapy now and still trying to process everything. For anybody going through anything like this, stay strong, it will get better with time. If you feel ready, start doing some therapy. Stay safe!
I have Functional Neurological Disorder which psychological features the dissociation elements and delayed emotions that impact me a lot. It’s very complex and I’m tired all the time 😞
Thank you so much for making this video. every single thing in this entire video hits too close to home. Thank you for making me feel seen. To anyone out there who can relate to this, know you're not alone.
You are very welcome!
I recently told my parent that I have been having extreme suicidal thoughts, like at school someone was spreading rumors about me and I was constantly judged and started crying and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t want to dealt with this pain and wanted to just end my life. I recently found out the person who started the rumor was one of my friends, which has displaced my trust by a mile. And I am going to leave that school this month as I have figured out that even my own friends are toxic jerks that took advantage of me, and I noticed this over the years and just looked it over, but now I can’t handle it.
Thank you so much for your videos, they give me all of the comforting feelings.
Thank you! We love and appreciate our viewers😊
the fact that i clicked on this video and even related to more than one point just confirms what i already knew: that i'm ODD hhhh, yes pun intended, but that laughter was prolly just proof of the last point lol, double-edged sword right there :p
Very often when I am tired I am getting suicidal thoughts and see no reason to live. For example sometimes when I am so tired and exhausted, mostly emotionally I get physically tired too and think about never wanting to have kids, or not wanting to work anymore or just thinking that I cant take myself anymore and want to be gone. Thats such a strange feeling tbh…
Okay, y'all are really coming THRU with the Omori art 🙌🏽
IKR!?? I love that they use omori references jejej
I have been "isolated" to a degree due to a serious allergy i have by my mom. This has kept me from really socializing and doing this most people have. She also had a serious medical issue herself she got from when I was born. Now that I'm 13 I started to realize how depressed I was and just lived with it and stopped caring. It seems I should un-plug the refrigerator.
That last one really makes me think of my mother. She obviously grew up in a very toxic family of alcoholics and manic depressive narcissists. My mother was left behind at some store by her mother when she was like 6 and ended up walking home after a very reasonable for an abandoned 6 year old panic attack. When she got home her mother brushed it all off and said that she thought my mother had already walked home on her own and that was why she left and seemed to barely be happy that her daughter made it home and was safe. Her father almost certainly also did emotional incest with my mother and her sister. He started with my mother, since she was the oldest and then switched to my Aunt, the youngest. Just a bunch of weird sympathetic narcissism going on.
My dad's dad abandoned his mother and she married and then remained when her first husband passed away. He also studied animal psychology before dropping out to work on the rail road. I often felt somewhat exposed to the concepts presented in psychology but it wasn't until my grandparents passed away that many stories of their abuse and neglect started to come out. It was then that I started to look inward and saw all of the mental illness as almost being by the book. it was around at that point that I realized that I was probably manic depressive but have been to afraid too look further and too poor to do much about it. I used to think my mood swings were just how emotions worked but when I realized that I was often more down than I was up and I was often chasing the high of simply staying up late all the time that I realized that I was reinforcing my depressive cycles with my manic ones.
I haven't been diagnosed but my behavior is so close to certain manic depressive examples that I've tried to explore some of the solutions to mania driven depression.
For one I try to chase that high less and less and I've learned what I pay for when I get the high of being up until 4am for the 20th day in a row. By simply going to bed earlier and stimulating myself less at night I find that I start looking forward to the morning and the next day more. The fact that I can feel so profoundly different from simply challenging some of my subconscious assumptions has been encouraging and makes me feel like I'm on the correct path.
The martial art Aikido has also done much to give me a way to contact and communicate with my emotional core in a way that I never had before. I used to be more emotionally disconnected but something internally welds together after you've been thrown around like a sack of flower for the 1000th time. If I were to describe Aikido in a psychologically reliant way, Aikido is a very safe and pro-social environment to allow you to confront your own self in a structured, safe and encouraging environment. For me it was a form of exposure therapy for social and performance anxiety. It's also fun and intricate and repetitive. So I could see how many people with things like OCD, PTSD and possibly autism might benefit from it. The exercise is brisk but otherwise mild and it, along with the socialization and human contact are powerful antidepressants on their own. Aikido is somehow simultaneously gentle and spirited. For me it was maybe even a type of secular church.
i love patrick teahan! so stoked to see my 2 faves collaborating.
Yay! Thank you for watching💙💙
This is very insightful. Thank you so much 😢❤
wow--one popped up again last night, leading to a ridiculous argument with my beloved spouse. And then the delayed feelings took over. Whew. I'm back in my body this morning. Thanks for this.
Thank you for animating this and making it available to a broader audience! 👍
That last one was way too relatable I kinda makes sense on why ppl get all weird when I overshare my past
I had lightbulbs coming on from beginning to end. Thank you. No longer just hopeless or bad, it all ties together. ❤
All of these hit me so hard. Explained why I am the way I am. I didn't realise why.... thank you.
I imagine many comedians like Robin Williams would resonate with #5. "I keep smiling because if I didn't, you'd ask."
Everyone's feelings and experiences are valid, especially when it comes to past traumas. It's important to acknowledge that whatever emotions arise from difficult experiences are completely normal. Remember, you're not alone in facing challenges. Also, it's essential to respect others' privacy and avoid gossiping or sharing personal details about anyone's experiences without their permission. Respecting boundaries creates a supportive environment where everyone can heal and grow.
thanks for great video! It helps me to figure out how I made my characteristic things. I've always thought I have depression at the base. And laughing off my traumas, too.
Thank you for educating on trauma. I love to learn about it. It’s a sensitive topic and can help understanding better. It also helps me to reflect on my own experiences and family dynamics. But also helps understanding things I didn’t know. The videos help for sure. Thank you ❤
+Psych2GoTv *Thanks for the time-stampable adversities:*
0:42 *1. Emotional Delay*
1:46 *2. Refrigerator Buzz Depression*
2:50 *3. Being Tired as a Trigger*
3:53 *4. On-the-spot Dissociation*
4:50 *5. Laughing through Pain*
I wasn't ready to watch this video. I wanted to but I needed time before open it, and still hurt when I remember my childhood. My inner child comes to cry sometimes and asking for a hug, a hug I didn't receive in the past and now have to do to myself. My parents wasn't ready for a kid, not how they should be. In the end I was an experience, a product to be better version of his parents with excessive expectations but also overprotective parents. I couldn't develop communication because if I wanted to do something it have to be on his control and watch. I became a person who cannot maintain a relationship for long time because of that, with no perspective of life, zero interest in the future just working all days and make money and asking to hit by a truck, because I even could do this by myself. I'm a failure and the pain never disappear, I just ask to my sister have a better life.
This could be easily be me writing this.
Best wishes for you friend
This video hits the right spot in my life.
Thank you ❤
I have experienced everything you listed in this video. I appreciate your channel thank you for sharing.
Being tired is a HUGE trigger for my anxiety. I just get super emotional whenever I have to do things. This is a reason why I take a shower and exercise in the morning. It gets me going.
Very helpful in a gentle way❣️ Being seen and heard properly is so hard for childhood trauma survivors but crucial to real recovery as adults- Great to see a collab with Patrick ( you look adorable) who is so very helpful 🥰
“POW, right in the kisser” is also a very traumatic expression.
HEELLLPPP 😭😭
Wait!
I vividly remember the day I realized how much I relied on laughter and joking to hide and avoid my inner turmoil.
It was the first time in my entire life I went to a counselor. I confessed that I had been struggling with suicidal thoughts. My immediate response to verbalizing my struggles was to smile and laugh it off, so I did. When the counselor simply gave me a sympathetic look and nodded without saying anything, letting me linger in my own desperate attempts to distract my thoughts, it made me realize “oh…this is for real…I’m genuinely not okay…this isn’t a joke anymore…”
My chest honestly aches when I think back to that very moment. When my shaky, nervous giggles turned into small sobs. Until that very moment, I thought that stuff only happened in the movies.
Excellent! 🎉 great stuff to unpack in here. Challenging yet gentle. 👏 how ironic we have a fridge buzzing!
I have refrigerator buzz anxiety too. Just a constant state of low grade anxiety that medication doesn't help. I have no idea when it started.
Very helpful, these traumas are definitely something for me to think about. Many thanks.
Yaaaass!!! Love this collab with Patrick! Gosh this hit all the top notes. 😭😭😭Just when I thought I knew all the signs I learn more. Thank you for putting this gem together.
Laughing through the pain is how I live my life
Thank you. This and the therapy I started last year is helping me realize the trauma I dealt with and how to heal from it
Wow! Thank you so much, it's reliable
I related heavily to the last one. I would talk with my former coworkers and I learned that a lot of what I’ve been through was actually not normal. Though I wouldn’t joke about it or anything, just didn’t have the grasp yet of “hey. That’s not normal”
Why is this so relatable
Bcuz we all have intergenerational trauma ♥️
@@darlene-MamaD ❤️
Why is all of this highly specific... I feel exposed
I wasn't previously aware of the term "refrigerator buzz depression," but I now I think I might want to talk to my therapist about it
I laugh through my trauma, but I am highly aware of it (I dont go through therapy the max I've ever done is spoken to my school counselor about it). I just don't like serious conversations because they make me uncomfortable and force me to actually accept the fact that it is serious. Also, if I laugh it off, it tricks my body into not crying while talking about it. It also makes it a feel a bit more lighthearted especially when I'm texting, so it doesn't make the conversation feel like it is so serious because then it puts the spotlight on me. As much as I love ranting, making it seem like the topic is all about me makes me feel selfish which is exactly how I'm feeling while writing this. (It sounds confusing but whatever)
I am a teenager and have been dealing with a psychologically abusive dad for years. Insults, yelling, blah blah blah. You get the point. I've always had thoughts where I think I'm being overdramatic, or it isn't that serious because I figured out my father was abusive pretty young (Somewhere around 7 to 10 years old). While I have no idea whether my siblings are aware of it especially since one of them looks up to my dad. Which makes sense because they are young but when no one else that is experiencing the abuse is mentioning it, even my own mother, it starts to make me question it. My grandma's and friends reassure me whenever I tell them about it or when I tell people in general about it, but I still question it.
He doesn't usually get physical. The max he has ever done was almost punch me, but he stopped himself (He is ex-military so it would have hurt like a motherfucker if he went through with it). Which was terrifying, but I wasn't completely not expecting it. He says he doesn't remember it which, for almost a week, made me think I was crazy, but I remembered that my siblings remembers that day.
Another story is when he had grabbed me and like tossed me in my room. Those were the only times other than when I was like 9 and younger when he used to smack me and my siblings on the back of the head (on that one nerve) as a punishment for stupid mistakes kids would make. Now, whether that is physical abuse, I haven't got a clue since some people say that getting smacked as a kid is normal and others say it isn't. But I do know that I am abused.
(If you want some context or more story's just ask)
PATRICK TEAHAN LET'S GOOOO!!!!
Yeah, unfortunately I relate to almost all of them. I am already taking EMDR for trauma, but I am still stuck in the same environment.
My trauma is related to my parents being perfectionists (one of them being a narc) and me being undiagnosed with aspergers at the time (having weird behaviour that they didn't like).
Thank you Psych2go. This video really helped ❤.
refrigerator buzz depression is so real. im an only child and have always been alone until one day no trigger at all i just realise "damn, im lonely as shit. my life sucks" plus i live with one parent my entire life and even so she was always very busy during my childhood.
This was awesome! I love Patrick Teahan's channel, and this helped explain and visualize a lot of the theory he talks a lot about
I LOVE HOW OMORI IS IN SO MANY OF THEIR VIDEOS NOWWW
Almost everyone i know (including me) has a scar on their knee.
I have one too.
Same
Same
Why the knees???
@@amazinggrapes3045 I don't know-
I frequently speak of my traumatic brain injury in humorous terms-- not because my family was toxic or invalidating (they're actually close to ideal), but because I don't know how to process something that I didn't exactly experience. Of course I did experience it, but my memory was damaged to the point that I have missing or altered memories, especially in connection with that crash, & I was comatose for multiple weeks so there's a huge gap that can only be filled with dreams of not being able to wake up. That doesn't invalidate the many people for whom toxic families are the reason, though I do want to point out that it can happen even to us who have amazing, positive families.
Omg!!! Thank you so much for the info!!!
You are so welcome!
Thanks for so helpful and valuable video as always ❤❤❤
You are so welcome!
One good thing to remember is, some peoples trauma might seem like a little issue at most for you. People can feel different ways about something, and can be hurt much more by something you can brush off
Thank you, Patrick.
Omg the first one on emotional delay is so me, IT’S LITERALLY WHAT PEOPLE ENVY ABOUT ME cos emotional delay makes me super cognitive
All of these i can relate to in some way. Thanks for putting it into words for me!
Ok, let's real real here for a min. Recently, my parents have been very controlling of me. From what I do, when I do it, etc. I barely have a social life. And the only time when I can.saying something on something is when I have my phone at school.
I'm 17 and getting close to graduating. My parents have been quite literally forcing me to do my studies. They even taken away many of my stuff, so I'm forced to be on my school chromebook to work. There are days where I'm up to 7 at night, and then have an hour to get ready for bed. I don't get my phone, my personal laptop, my Switch, or even my TV.
And now, they're checking my lunchbox. I'm only allowed to take a sandwich and two Cliff bars for when I'm done with PE at school.
My daily schedule kinda looks like this:
Wake up
Get ready for school(eat, get dresses, etc)
School
Go home
Unpack
Study
Feed animals and have dinner
Study
Get ready for bed (shower, make bed, etc)
Sleep.
So, is this healthy or my parents being very toxic towards me
Also, I'm a very sticky person. I might be wrong, but I think this is part of my childhood trauma.
And yes, this is a thing that has been happening for years now.
I get "On the spot disassociation" all the time. I always feel like my parents are ordering me to do things I don't want to when they're just giving me friendly advice.
I may have done the "Laughing through the pain" thing yesterday. I made sure my managers knew that I missed work last Friday because I went to the hospital to get a stuck piece of steak out of my esophagus. While I acted like I was fine, they reacted like I was telling them I choked and almost died.
A wonderful collaboration, thank you.
Thanks for tuning in!
The laughing through the pain type trauma maybe me really think about the abuse I went through with my former in college.. i found it relatable and it's kinda bitter sweet in a way.. because even though it happened years ago and I've moved on.. the thoughts still haunt me a little..
Loving that omori art, Ccinee! 😊
Yes our animator does amazing work!💙
4:16 I one time presented something in front of my class and teacher and suddenly I couldnt hear anything but a ring noise anymore, not my voice or my teachers voice. I felt dizzy and asked to sit down so yeah, said I just didnt drink enough that day
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I have so many traumas but i dont know how to overcome them. So many of them are because of my family (especially my father). The biggest impact of them is i lost my trust to people. I feel panic attacks when trying to socialize with people. And i am alone because of this. I wish i could speak like others without feeling fear and anxiety. Your videos helps me to understand myself. I know that i have to accept my feelings and move on. But i feel very exhausted and old for my age.
Powerful and Emotionally Moving...😢❤