If you're feeling burnout from caring about others too much, you are not alone. Please share this with someone who needs to see this. Post it on your own social if you feel it will help those around you notice that you're burnout from caring.
How to be wellbeing? How to stop care about others , I feel al my days are the same boring empty but I'm doing things like studying walking listen to music and all these thing and I see the Enthusiasm gone from my life I don't feel it , about any thing I do , people around me told my that I'm cold , but I don't know what is wrong with me , I do realllly wanna change ,
Can you please _please_ provide links to the other videos referenced at the end of the current video? I want to know how to deal with burnout but I am not up to combing through your videos to find it. The only video linked is for your latest one, which is a completely unrelated topic. Edit to add- please do this for all the videos. This isn’t the first one I’ve wanted links to suggested videos before.
People who take advantage of highly empathetic people tend to quickly notice when the well dries up and will immediately turn around and call you a narcissist and say that youve ''changed'. Don't let people make you think youre crazy
So true-those who take advantage often lash out when you start setting boundaries. It’s not a reflection of you; it’s their discomfort with not being able to take advantage anymore. Stay strong and remember, protecting your energy is never selfish. 💛
I had a VERY similar experience after i disconnected from people and i was just trying to become friendly with people i wanted to connect before but never did while being anxious
If you’re constantly giving empathy and energy out, and you’ve got nothing coming in, eventually you’re going to burnout. Naturally you’re going to become more selfish. And this is an essential part of self-preservation and keeping you alive. Your body and mind are trying to protect you from further harm and emotional exhaustion.
My mother has always been narcissist for as long as I can remember. Because of her recent mental illness and decline (alzheimer) I take care of her, and what you are saying is true. I'm burned out and I feel I'm becoming more narcistic myself because I don't have much left for others and because I need to self-preserve.
Luckily I don't have a narcissist in my life,just a Mom, healthcare worker, nurturer to a fault,my issue is I try to make everyone think I'm so independent, I'm good,very,very rarely does anyone ask if I'm ok,hate confrontation so if I'm upset/hurt stuff it down. Since lost my parents only ones who could see it& unfortunately been many years. Even writing this feel like I'm whining,ppl have made me feel if I say anything what it is. Sorry I needed to vent❤
My late dad also a narcissist and all i can say is im glad i survived those dark moments where your not appreciated and they demand a lot from u when ur so tired and u have no other life 😢😢😢 i thought at first that helping and caring for others is a good thing but we should have a limit coz were still human we got tired, we need some motivation, we need to be appreciated even a simple thank u, we need more understanding as well, and we need time out coz if not were gonna snap and might lose yourself
This has made me realise I really need to stick to my boundaries when I say “I’m not ok to be vented to lately.” And not let others guilt me into listening because it’s “what you usually do? Have I done something wrong? Do you hate me?”
It’s so important to honor your boundaries, and it’s amazing that you’re recognizing this for yourself. Saying “no” doesn’t mean you’re a bad person-it means you’re taking care of your emotional health. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and setting limits is an act of self-love. You’re doing great! 💛
Man I wish I could do that too, I always worry so much about others I'm unable to tell them I'm not currently okay enough to be vented to because I worry it's smth serious they need to tell me or that they will need my help, but this sure is exhausting... it's that I don't care about my loved ones, but I do avoid them at times simply cause I can't take more emotions on me. The other night I even bursted in tears while I listened to someone I love, I couldn't help calling myself useless, angry at myself I couldn't figure out a way to help them yet, I got desperate, crying in the call, I'm on edge that's for sure, I really need to calm down, I guess I might be burnt out after all, but it's hard not to think I'm simply being selfish...
1:11 Strong sense of responsibility over others' emotions and suffering 2:17 Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected 3:00 Isolating yourself from others 3:43 Feeling angry, sad or depressed 4:34 Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts 4:57 Inability to concentrate or be productive You are not weak, you have been strong for a long time. I relate to all of these signs and if you do to your not alone❤❤❤
Well I stopped caring. And cut out 90% of the people I knew. A lot only came to me if they needed help, and rarely to spend a nice time. Life is better now.
my mom drains me so much it’s so hard. She randomly starts talking about how life turns out sad and depressing because youth ends and dreams die literally everyday sometimes right when I wake up. She gets mad when I don’t respond the way she wants, laughs at her jokes or let’s say im already focused on doing something and she decides to explain a movie she’s watching in which I have no desire to start watching mid way she calls me rude then gets up and leaves. It’s so so hard
Dude, that's awful, do you have your dad or any other understanding family members? If yes, please talk to them if your mother is being so mean. They will surely help you out.
I take care of my mom and it's the same thing I experience. Not to mention we could be talking about something benign and she'll start bringing up stuff that she's experienced and trauma dumping. It's exhausting and she wonders why I don't sit with her all day. I need a break from it and she makes me feel bad for not sitting with her all day for her to dump more on me.
Sorry that I'm not going to use punctuation because I'm using speech to text Your mom sounds exactly like what I'm suffering of but I remember to distance myself and not make my problems others issues and what I mean by that is quite literally I have gotten upset and started yelling at people because I think they're looking at me the wrong way or they're ignoring me when they're not it's paranoia I'm having to go to therapy to unlearn this unhealthy thought process that isn't logical and he's only based off of emotion and no it's not as easy as it sounds otherwise I would have had this issue squashed by now so I can try to understand where your mom's headspace could be at but at the same time don't take this out on your kid I don't even have kids so I don't get it but all I know is that if I had a parent dealing with what I had I would feel the same way can you ask relatives if your mother might be suffering from something making her behave this way or is this just her natural way of behaving she sounds like she needs to go to therapy just like I'm doing right now because I cannot control my emotions and the paranoia I feel and I really put myself In Harm's Way today thinking the people around me are trying to hurt me I've got an upset on numerous different occasions with the littlest things a look could set me off for the next couple of hours because I'm convinced of something that's not true because that's how my brain wants to perceive things when in reality that's not how the world Works she shouldn't act like this with a child I think she should be going to therapy like me this is why I don't want to have children anytime soon my issues cannot be implemented onto the kids I might have
So this is it... I have been giving people too much attention, and helping them, but then, I almost get nothing in return.....I sometimes feel nothing, im always focused on people, and yet, I never focus on myself....I feel like I cant do anything for them, yet, I still try so hard to help them.... I guess I am burned out....(and also ty for another vid, they helped me so much, especially with other people and even myself)
It sounds like you’ve been giving so much of yourself, and it’s completely okay to feel burnt out-it just shows how deeply you care. But remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking time to focus on yourself isn’t selfish; it’s necessary. We’re so glad the videos have helped you-don’t forget, you deserve the same care and love you give to others. 💛
@@Psych2go Thank you for showing me that I cant do stuff if I am not well. I think you are right about the fact I need to take care of myself. If I am not well, I wont be able to do anything. Thank you so much:)
I think that's why I deleted so many of my social media apps this past year, along with pulling away from folks I had been supportive of for years, but never really received the same type of support or empathy in return. I was gradually getting more resentful. The resentment triggered more passive aggressiveness in me, and that eats away at my own empathy. It becomes a vicious cycle and just adds to the depression. So then I find myself pulling away from everyone. I feel "guilt" over the growing resentment and anger, and don't really know what else to do, except isolate. I can still feel empathy towards others, but it's more guarded now, since it feels like it never gets appreciated, if we give it out too easily.
I feel the same. I ended up isolating myself from everyone to rest, recharge and protect myself. Then I realized that I was also waiting to receive some compassion in return. I received nothing and now I don't expect anything anymore from anyone but I have some resentment that I really would like to get rid of.
I'm sorry I'm leaving you a comment that speech to text but I'm so glad that you left a comment and decided to voice the way you feel I guess because I was just explaining this to my mother I didn't have the right words but I was explaining to her about how empathy feels in my mind and the last couple of years throughout my entire life I have seen and felt slowly my empathy levels slowly go down more and more and it's like I'm guarding my empathy behind a door because I know I still have it I'm not a sociopath I still feel for other people when certain events but at the same time I don't want to feel empathetic for other people anymore nobody I've ever met deserves s*** I don't compliment anybody anymore because the last couple of times worked up the courage to talk to somebody and told them how amazing they looked or how awesome their shoes were and every single individual in the last couple of years only tells me that they know or looks at me and disgust and tells me to go away why the actual f*** what I care about any stranger that has to talk to me anymore I know that I don't mean anything to the rest of you and I'm just another person and if people compliment me nowadays I really don't want to believe them honestly I don't think anybody wants to be a decent nice person anymore and anything anybody has to say anymore is condescending I see it like this way online all the time so it's kind of almost be the same way and in real life I'm just done trying to be nice to people I know that I don't have Ill-will for people but i don't understand what the point of being nice has anymore, why do I need to?
Being honest I feel like I might have empathy burnout. Even since childhood I always was this very emotional and empthatic guy. I always tried my best to help others, I always feel bad for others suffering, I felt sad for things like wars on the world or seeing hurt animals. To be honest I was never special in anything, only thing I was good at was being empthatic and helping others feel better. I have been dealing with my own traumas for years and lately I feel like something inside me have died. I feel like my emotions and empathy gone and I am scared it will never come back. I feel terrible with it. Its like I lost the biggest part of myself. Your video help me understand a bit about this thank you ❤
Thank you for sharing this-it’s clear how deeply you care, and that’s a beautiful part of who you are. Empathy burnout can feel like losing yourself, but it doesn’t mean your emotions and empathy are gone forever. It’s a sign that you’ve been carrying so much for so long, and now it’s time to focus on healing and caring for yourself. Have you thought about small ways to recharge or give yourself the same compassion you give to others? You’re not alone in this, and you’re still that kind, empathetic person at your core. ❤💛
@@drdesu5312 You will be your old self again after you have recharged and heal. Your empathy is not forever lost. It's like an MP bar in a video game, it'll take time to recharge, but you have to NOT use MP abilities for a while. Also...Kakyoin has one of the coolest JoJo themes. 👍
For a very long time I thought I was behaving selfishly, I used to be a very empathetic person. But I stopped being one because it was very tiring for me. I couldn't explain my feelings to my friends, which often lead to quarrels between us. Thanks to this film, my remorse eased. Thank you.
one night i was scrolling through my phone, feeling like i’d never figure out why some people just seem so magnetic. then i came across this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and something about it caught my attention. reading it was like turning on a light in a dark room. it’s not about pretending to be someone you’re not; it’s about unlocking the energy you already have. trust me, this book is worth every page
Can you guys make a video about the significant impact loneliness can have on us? And how hurtful it can be to say to someone "you have to learn to enjoy your own company sometimes!" Or "spend time with yourself!" When thats what you do all day every day for months or years, that is not helpful advice. We are social creatures and we need to socialize. Its such an agonizing feeling...
You’re absolutely right-loneliness can have such a profound impact on us, and it’s a topic that deserves more attention. Those kinds of comments, though well-meaning, can sometimes feel dismissive when someone’s been isolated for so long. Thank you for sharing this-your perspective is so important, and we’ll definitely consider making a video on this. You’re not alone in feeling this way, and we hear you. 💛
I'm literally crying, because this is what has been happening to me since last year, I always was the helping empathic person in any context, but constantly thinking about others added with pent up stress from life this past year has turned me into someone who just feels like staying by himself, I really wish to go back to the person I used to be but I just cannot bring myself to that anymore, I feel exhausted at just the thought of spending time with someone that might unload all their problems onto me, but I also feel lonely like never before in my life. Just wanted to share because I have no other outlet since this thing is really hard to explain to people in our everyday life. Take care ❤
I'm so tired of always being the responsible one. I'm tired of my emotional pain causing others around me to need my comfort when I need it too. I just want to be taken care of sometimes too. But apparently it's too much of a burden for my friends... I need to clock out and take a break... thanks for making this, I needed to hear it.
I’m a people pleaser on a slow going road to recovery. Friends will ask me to go out the following day, even after hearing FROM ME that I’m sick - while we’re already out, and I’ve sacrificed time I could’ve been in bed getting much needed rest, but I still came out bcuz my friends “needed me there”… I wish I could simply and easily just tell them “I’m sick and I’m choosing me.” but I’m so afraid of their potential reactions that I just end up bottling it up and looking for excuses to get out of things.
I just dealt with something very similar yesterday...with my son (19). I am now blocked on all available platforms. He's cut me off because I am exhausted and sick. I wasn't able to jump to his needs/wants. No one ever considered the way I feell
Sometimes people we call friends lack the emotional maturity - we have friends that check only some boxes and some are around for fun times and honestly I value them. But mature ones should be able to understand when someone says they need "me time" or even offer to do nothing with you. I struggle with this myself, resenting some that don't even ask me how I am doing but I try to help so much. I realize they just aren't emotionally mature due to numerous issues. I still like them for who they are. I still struggle with resentment when people don't act like me and constantly have to remind myself that we are all different with different backgrounds.
Ive been dealing with a narcissistic ex who constantly reaches out through burner numbers to contact me. He constantly trauma dumped on me, and I vicariously listened. Even after he cheated on me I stuck around for a bit. He has drained me to my core. Im normally pleasant to be around, empathetic, giving, and listening. And he took full advantage of all of my kindness. I noticed ive been getting extremely angry over the smallest things and have been questioning my self-worth and how ive become this way… thank you sm for this video. It gave me so much clarity and I need to completely cut contact with my ex if I want to restore my sanity.
Not gonna lie.. I was on the verge of crying whit how much this represent the last 10 years of my life.. I had tears in my eyes by the end of it. I started taking more care of myself about 2 years ago.. but it's honestly still hard to cope whit it even if I do see improvement.. The more the video went the more relatable it was... but I didn't really know something like ''empathy burnout'' was a thing... I might look at some stuff another way after hearing this... Thanks.
I am going to therapy and I have clearly told my psychologist that I think I am emotionally exhausted. In the before session, she took me to an orphange and told how grateful I must be because I have what they do not have. I know that she didn't mean to compare the struggle, but I felt guilty for not being able to be empathetic or grateful... Now, I am unable to feel anyone and myself too...
It’s so brave of you to acknowledge how you’re feeling and to seek therapy. It sounds like your psychologist may have been trying to offer perspective, but it’s completely valid to feel the way you do. Emotional exhaustion can make it hard to feel empathy or gratitude, and that’s okay-it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Have you had a chance to share these feelings with your psychologist? It might help to talk about how this experience made you feel. 💛
I’m really surprised they did this. The whole point of therapy is trying to figure out what it is you’re feeling and what the root cause of those feelings are so you can address them and care for them. Instead they tried to give you a different perspective and essentially said “cheer up, it could be worse”. I’m so sorry this happened to you, it must’ve felt invalidating and made you feel guilty, which is the exact opposite of what you need right now. This therapist may not be the right fit for you, but I encourage you to tell them what you’re feeling before looking elsewhere.
This is so me, I usually care for ppl during my junior high school era, always listened to my friends story even anonymous ppl online back then, and during early high school I slowly can't really feel the care for others, when my friend cried, I somehow didn't comfort her or hug her, I feel quite numb? .. and when I'm with my friends, I show emotions but I'll get really tired, and slowly I distant myself from my friends till late high school now, and yea, when my friends vented to me.. I can't feel the same empathy I had before..
I'm an empathetic person growing up but as i grow i become less empathetic because i always listen but never been listened to and given comfort..not even from my parents,so maybe this is the reason why i understand now,thank you❤
Thank you so so much. I’ve recently suffered with this, too, especially since I have and have had friends who’ve had very horrible and traumatic experiences. And I’ve always been there as a shoulder to cry on, and I’ve tried to empathise as best I could. But in the end, I have nothing left to give. Thankfully, my family and friends have helped by giving me some space, and I’ve been starting to look after myself. But yes people, please don’t do this to yourself, especially if you get nothing back in return.
Timelapse: 1:11 - Strong sense of responsibility over others emotion and suffering 2:17 - Feeling emotionality numb or diaconnected 3:00 - Isolating yourself from others 3:43 Feeling angry and sad and depressed 4:34 - Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts 4:57 - Inability to Concentra or be productive
This is so true and important 🙌 it is okay that you just cannot solve all those problems. You can offer what you are able to but there is a boundarie. You are worthy enough to look at your energy first.
this is an insightful video. To me emphasizing wasn't something I naturally got, but forced to use to cope with my difficult upbringing. Why I had such a difficult dad, why my mum wants to stay and wants me to be "happy". My mum always loved me but my dad was selfish in what he wanted. I do see why he does what he does and what made him to be who he is. But it led to burnout where I realised there was nothing in my power to change them despite how much I tried to understand them. It taught me how complicated life can be and no matter how much you can understand them you wont ever be able to handle to relate. I thought I had accepted this and moved on when I found my ex but the cycle ended up starting again where there was situations that I knew I couldnt control why she did what she did. I realised 2 things. 1. After so many years of being in an impossible situation where I wasnt getting enough attention and love from my dad, and anything I said to try and help was used against me, I dont know how to comfortably share my worries. 2. I more or less got with my ex who turned out to be very similar to my dad. Someone who loves to say the right answer but doesnt act on it. And when issues came up would jump on me to do something about it and respond selfishly when I dont have anything positive to say. I dont despise her, I hold strong feelings for her, maybe because I feel like there was something I still couldve done. But I knew at the time I had to break it off with emotional burnout and not being able to comprehend how to handle what she wanted from me.
I scoffed thinking this couldn’t be what I was feeling until watching the video, and it fits so well with a multitude of experiences, current and previous. Thank you for the great content, as always. Have a lovely year.
Thank you. This has helped me. I have taking on the responsibilities of others. Mostly my mom for too long. Im exhausted 😢 i feel selfish for not being able to help even with the smallest task but this video helped me so much ty
i remember feeling like i was always the one fading into the background while others stood out effortlessly. it was frustrating and made me doubt myself a lot. then i came across this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it showed me things i’d never even considered. it’s not just a self-help book; it’s like a guide to understanding your own energy and using it to connect with people. if you’ve ever felt like you’re not seen, this book might change everything.
I have a friend that's unknowingly taking advantage of my empathy right now. Always anxious, new crisis every other day, I'm pretty sure they have borderline personality disorder. Their struggles are legitimate but hearing about them every single day is exhausting.
Because I’m an introvert, I’m experiencing the WORST case of empathy burnout. I’ve been emotionally exhausted since I escaped an abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. Actively volunteering and engaging in self care keeps me grounded, but the second someone interacts with me (even on a surface level) it immediately exhausts me. I’ve been holding space with myself ever since and will continue to, I’m just so overwhelmed with everyone treating me like a therapist and trauma dumping on me.
With everything that's been going on lately in my personal and professional life, this.... helped a lot more than i thought it would. It hit every major feeling I've felt for a couple months now, and explains it in a way that feels correct to the feeling. Perhaps i should take a small break. I've been worrying a lot.
Switching the approach from trying to solve other peoples’ problems myself to trying to help them solve their own problem not only helped me preserve my own well being but also made it easy to identify those who try to establish an emotionally parasitic relationship
So this is what I've been going through. When I was younger, I used to be so much more compassionate and optimistic. I like to think I still am, but its just so more diluted now than it was back then. I think my old status as the therapist-friend in highschool took a huge hit on my empathy battery. I honestly thought I was just being more selfish than usual, and I felt so guilty for it a lot of times... this put so much into perspective, thank you
Resonates infinitely but in my life setting any boundary leads to cuss outs and threats or sometimes just plain absolute ignored... no family, no friends, 4 kids (he makes it feel like 5), no direction... the burnout feels deliberate.
Thank you for this video i also had all these problems of my self when ppl i used to listen to tell me that ive been ignoring them and i also distant my self from them I've been crying every night bcz i thought im becoming selfish i didn't want to talk to ppl thinking none of them would undestand im literally in tears bcz this has given me some hope thank you so much
I think this is/has happened to me and I’m still trying to reacharge! I have been for 2-3 years now without know till now I keep forcing empathy through to the point I CANT care anymore. Like if you took you dead phone. Put it on charge then took it off at 3% and used it till it died again And do that over and over and over again!
Yoooooooo, I needed this! Years ago I left a community I was close to but I couldn't explain why I had to leave despite the people there being long time friends. It turns out it was empathy burnout, and though it seemed like I nuked myself unnecessarily from the community, that was the ONLY boundary I could do, as the community kept gathering people with a victim mentality. For so long after that I thought I became cold, lost the empathetic warm self of mine since, as doomed to be alone. But then I found a new community and am slowly regaining my empathy back, while having hard boundaries now that I understand more of what I need to take care of myself. Crazy vindication
Timestamps 1). Strong sense of responsibility over others' emotions and suffering 1:09 2). Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected 2:15 3). Isolating yourself from others 2:58 4). Feeling angry, sad, or depressed 3:41 5). Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts 4:30 6). Inability to concentrate or be productive 4:55 Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Listening to almost the end, I caught myself thinking. As a child, I devoted all my attention to friends and games, was impulsively unstable, etc., experienced bullying from classmates and unpleasant conversations with parents. And now I am that teenager who has had the biggest and most unpleasant changes in life, I realized that I don’t care about anyone, that I have problems with concentration and not having time to do anything, worse memory, etc. And I’m not sure that this will be fixed, but I think I will just be a lonely person who no one will help.
The timing is scarily perfect. I've always feel like I'm responsible for others emotions or feel like everything is my fault. It's difficult to just make time for yourself when people sees that wrongly like seeing me as a narcissistic person or selfish. I seriously want to just isolate myself from everything but school and work won't let me do that. It's exhausting 😭
i remember this one time i felt like no matter what i did, people just didn’t notice me. i tried everything-confidence boosters, social tips, you name it-but nothing seemed to work. then i found this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it completely shifted how i saw myself. it’s not just about being noticed; it’s about understanding the energy you project. honestly, this book made all the difference for me. if you’ve ever felt invisible, you need to read it.
6 out of 6 thanks for another great informative video. What's frustrating is when you set boundaries and people guilt trip you saying things like I just wanted to vent or can't I can't on you
haha it did not just EMOTIONALLY resonate with me, it found me. lately I’ve been so burned out because of my friends problems and how I had to be their “ear.” I mean me personally, I’m very empathetic, and watching this video just made me realize it’s not me, it’s empathy burn out. Thank you so much oh my gosh . :(
I have emotionally, physically, and even monetarily, when i could, supported everyone around me for most of my life. It was a personality trait that was nurtured and i think it also because a survival mechanism during the hardest years of my life so far. I have been draining myself little by little each year, almost got taken out by a narcissist, and I would handle everyone else's problems except my own. It took taking in a friend in who was going to be homeless to show me just how low I was on that energy and how I never really took the tome to refill it. I felt guilty when I had to set boundaries so i wouldnt be taking on everyone else's problems.
Feeling empathy for others and worrying about /helping others also can be a way to avoid helping ourselves which feels infinitely harder to do.. I've analyzed this about myself. I go through a pattern of helping others and focusing on them because no one else is and I CAN, but all along I really should focus on myself. It's far easier to help others for me, but it is me who I should be helping all along and id be willing to bet money this happens to so many people.
One motto I came up with is: take a break before you break. I've been isolating from humanity these past few years because I was not only experiencing burnout, but also had a lot of work to do on myself from the inside out. I was overstimulated for such a long time, it took me thousands of hours to recover from it. I had to separate my past from my present and learn to move on in a healthy way. I had to learn hundreds of little details to build a proper framework of stability in my life. Of course, moving to a small town and cutting many people out of my life helped as well, people that didn't belong there in the first place. I don't even miss them anymore. I also had to door slam my own mother for many good reasons, but that's a whole big thing in and of itself. I'm getting better slowly but surely. I've done plenty of healing over the past few years, but still have far to go.
I check all the boxes. I'm so relieved to have a word for this feeling, now, instead of thinking bad things about myself. Not sure how I'm going to fill my cup yet without detaching from my loved ones though...
I know people who've been physically, verbally and sexually abused. Things got to the point where they were exhausting for me. My life wasn't ever going so great but I always smiled and stayed positive. I still do but people aren't going to sob in my lap anymore than I'll tolerate now. I needed a break, a long break
Thanks a lot guys, I needed this video❤ Now I can understand more things about me end my actual emotional, mental and productivity state and why every night I can’t go to bed before 2 am even though I have to wake up early the next day. Thanks. Again 🙏❤️
Wow psych2go I’m impressed with how you’ve read my mind. I’ve never heard of this anywhere else nor on this channel but this was the reason I ended a 3 year relationship in 2023 . I still feel terrible about it to this day. I thought I was nuts. I very much appreciate this video
Thank you so much for validating my feelings and experience. I thought I am just being a victim and just not strong enough. This makes me really bad about myself. I now have a term to call it. I do have Empathy burnout 😭. The sudden disconnection really scared me and I thought I devolved into something or someone horrible....
Thank you hopefully this will explain how i feel better than i can say with words myself. Im drained to the max and i cant do it anymore after living a whole life taking care of a mentally unwell family and addicted parents who all always play the victim. Im exhausted beyond belief and getting snappy (desperate for healthy boundaries) but the following guilt and backlash is too much to bare.
there was a time when i kept wondering why some people seemed to naturally draw others in while i was just…there. no matter what i tried, i couldn’t figure out how they did it. then someone mentioned the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and i decided to check it out. the way it explains how your aura affects everything around you? it blew me away. it’s like having a secret code to unlock your magnetic energy. this book is a game-changer.
Yes and I started having empathy burn out 9 months ago(and still going through it) and I was extremely apathetic and didn't care about anyone now I'm doing okay I'm not as apathetic but instead of feeling no empathy I'm feeling 40% percent of my empathy coming back.
i used to think being magnetic was just about looks or confidence, but i couldn’t have been more wrong. i read this book called Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it totally changed my perspective. it breaks down the energy and mindset behind true attraction in a way that just makes sense. once i started applying what it taught, i noticed people reacting to me differently almost instantly. it’s seriously worth a read.
There is nothing wrong on giving. Setting bounderies is not being selfish. It is self care. Most takers have no limit. They just keep on taking and sometimes they make you feel guilty if you dont give. Before you give, think twice if that person would also do the same for you. Its give and take. Its ok to give but dont expect anything else in return. If someone doesnt give you the same time/energy/effort that you give, dont be disrouraged. Not all people are as kind hearted as you are. Give, but set bounderies. Give only as much as they would give you. Narcissists would take advantage of you but thats life. Next time, dont give them any, then move on. I had an experience where my old classmate injured his leg because he thought it was a bright idea to jump at the staircase. The school was closing so there is no one at the infirmary. I lend him his shoulder from school to his home. When we got home, his father blamed me for what happened instead of thanking me for helping his stupid son. Around a year later, that same classmate did a disgusting prank at me which is a long story so I'll skip it. I bet if I got my leg injured, he wouldnt do the same for me. Set bounderies. Its not selfish to have bounderies. Some people are not worth your time/energy/effort.
+?-+++ (+:yes -:no ?:sometimes) I feel more fatigued than last school year. It's not because of people in school but too many things that i can't even explain..
I’ve recently been feeling really “emo” and want to help but can’t even if I am right there. I thought I was just being selfish but I guess I have my answer now. Thanks
Finding it hard to focus, blundering about big time, making mistakes here there and everywhere, now I know why I end up like this 3 or 4 times a year. 😮
I just had a conversation with my housemates about me feeling totally emotionally drained and this really relate to alot of my problems right now, I feel angry about others having problems now while I always have been there for others.
I feel like this is my case. I usually feel numb hearing terrible news. I then break down crying later that day. Sometimes it takes days before I start to cry over loss. I care. It's just that it doesn't hurt me anymore.
I've never had no sympathy for no one, never shown love to anyone at all. I'm just cold and emotionless towards everyone because I don't want to let my guard down for nobody and I don't want nobody to come near me because I'm just too selfish with everything
Use to have that, empathy burn out... especially this year since my friend had depression... i went through depression... and my friends left me. Now i stopped caring about people. It only brought me to pain.
I'm going through this exact thing and I think of others so much. I cry for others and I try to fix things that I know I can't and I'm currently drained by this feel of empathy of the ones I love even when they hurt me 💔😢 but I am going to pull through and whatever obstacles come my way I'm going per server and do my best no matter what bc God has a plan for me and things are going to be okay 👌🥹
It sounds like you’ve been dealing with a lot, and it’s okay to feel tired and drained. Remember, it’s okay to take a step back and focus on yourself. You deserve peace and people who pour into you just as much as you pour into them. What’s one thing you can do for *you* today? 💛
It's easy to say "set boundaries" or "prioritize your own mental health". But if a person relies on you to give them hope, strengh and consolation, you can't just walk away and say "I need a few days to recharge, see you next week, don't kill yourself in the meantime pls :)"
I wish this video came out when I was with my ex. I was so exhausted hearing about their problems (and dealing with the emotions of people from my old job), I disconnected myself and it led to a lot of arguments and crippling self-hatred for not being a better friend/partner.
I do my best to listen and comfort others. My has is a Retired Army Vet, my live-in Mother-in-law has dementia and a double amputee. My own Mother passed 13 yrs ago. My boys (19 & 23) have moved out, but the youngest still thinks i should leave my Husband so i can take care of him. I do my best to xare for everyone, but i cant fix any of them. Yet, everything is my fault. Yesterday, I told my youngest i wasn't feeling well and couldnt get together for lunch. After he told me how insensitive I was, etc, he ended uo blocking me from our only methods of communication. He's mad because I wouldnt fold under the pressure, nor respond to his hateful comments. I'm just exhausted. I dont have it in me, at the moment, to junp and bend to everyone else's needs/wants. Yet, I'm the selfish and poor me, for choosing a dayvto stay in bed for rest and recovery 😢
(Commented this on another video but it fits here too so,) I worked at a community resource centre for a year. It was fun for the most part, and I generally love helping people and making them smile. However, it began to weigh down on me, not that I blame anyone at all. It’s just that the people I was working with were going through a hard time, and the same could be said for my coworkers. I let one person trauma dump on me, and I straight up started crying right in front of them because their backstory was so messed up, that was probably disrespectful of me, and I’m still embarrassed that I couldn’t control myself. Eventually, I left quietly, but some of the people I worked with remember me fondly, so at least I did something right.
I spent about 2 hours sitting in my truck (it's winter time) after work last night because I knew I could not take going in the house and being bombarded with things. Be it my wife, our youngest son, the three neighborhood cats that I feed that were probably waiting for me on the porch, out of food. It seems like some nights when I get home it's an hour of doing/giving/helping before I can even relax myself. Our oldest son came home Christmas Eve last year to unload on me about his relationship problems. My boss' wife recently left him and he's been talking to me about that. It's one person after another, but I have to be there for them. Even though it is probably going to kill me.
I was feeling like i was living a lie I always thought i was considerate and empathetic and lately wondering...have i changed?? You every video is perfect
I was literally thinking earlier today of how crappy it's been lately, I felt like I was in going from being way too empathetic to the point of being dragged around, to being a complete sociopath, changing from one to the other every hours, hell between interactions even.
I can really relate to a lot of the symptoms here, and it makes me glad im starting fresh at a new college next fall. Less people to worry about immediately, a fresh opportunity, and a good chance to stop feeling burnt for once. (I've felt burnt for a LONG time now, but only really isolated myself and felt depressed.) Though if anything, im probably a little bit insane due to how this past year ended, though, who isn't slightly crazy in the film industry?
If you're feeling burnout from caring about others too much, you are not alone. Please share this with someone who needs to see this. Post it on your own social if you feel it will help those around you notice that you're burnout from caring.
How to be wellbeing? How to stop care about others , I feel al my days are the same boring empty but I'm doing things like studying walking listen to music and all these thing and I see the Enthusiasm gone from my life I don't feel it , about any thing I do , people around me told my that I'm cold , but I don't know what is wrong with me , I do realllly wanna change ,
The pain in the world regularly burns me out, the only way I can cope is to walk away for a while.
Can you please _please_ provide links to the other videos referenced at the end of the current video? I want to know how to deal with burnout but I am not up to combing through your videos to find it. The only video linked is for your latest one, which is a completely unrelated topic.
Edit to add- please do this for all the videos. This isn’t the first one I’ve wanted links to suggested videos before.
You just don't want any more responsibility.
I sent your video to my son🌹 I hope he looks at this because he's just like me and needs the advice🌹
People who take advantage of highly empathetic people tend to quickly notice when the well dries up and will immediately turn around and call you a narcissist and say that youve ''changed'. Don't let people make you think youre crazy
So true-those who take advantage often lash out when you start setting boundaries. It’s not a reflection of you; it’s their discomfort with not being able to take advantage anymore. Stay strong and remember, protecting your energy is never selfish. 💛
Why did this exact thing happen to me? I was called a narcissist, but I have anxiety.
I had a VERY similar experience after i disconnected from people and i was just trying to become friendly with people i wanted to connect before but never did while being anxious
@golden_szn as cliche as it is, you cant fill anyone elses cup with an empty glass. You gotta take care of yourself
@Killjoy.707 thank you, psych2go and its community are always supportive
If you’re constantly giving empathy and energy out, and you’ve got nothing coming in, eventually you’re going to burnout. Naturally you’re going to become more selfish. And this is an essential part of self-preservation and keeping you alive. Your body and mind are trying to protect you from further harm and emotional exhaustion.
My mother has always been narcissist for as long as I can remember. Because of her recent mental illness and decline (alzheimer) I take care of her, and what you are saying is true. I'm burned out and I feel I'm becoming more narcistic myself because I don't have much left for others and because I need to self-preserve.
Thank you @NarcSurvivor your words means a lot
Luckily I don't have a narcissist in my life,just a Mom, healthcare worker, nurturer to a fault,my issue is I try to make everyone think I'm so independent, I'm good,very,very rarely does anyone ask if I'm ok,hate confrontation so if I'm upset/hurt stuff it down. Since lost my parents only ones who could see it& unfortunately been many years. Even writing this feel like I'm whining,ppl have made me feel if I say anything what it is. Sorry I needed to vent❤
My late dad also a narcissist and all i can say is im glad i survived those dark moments where your not appreciated and they demand a lot from u when ur so tired and u have no other life 😢😢😢 i thought at first that helping and caring for others is a good thing but we should have a limit coz were still human we got tired, we need some motivation, we need to be appreciated even a simple thank u, we need more understanding as well, and we need time out coz if not were gonna snap and might lose yourself
Well said you nailed it.🙂
This has made me realise I really need to stick to my boundaries when I say “I’m not ok to be vented to lately.” And not let others guilt me into listening because it’s “what you usually do? Have I done something wrong? Do you hate me?”
Same
It’s so important to honor your boundaries, and it’s amazing that you’re recognizing this for yourself. Saying “no” doesn’t mean you’re a bad person-it means you’re taking care of your emotional health. You can’t pour from an empty cup, and setting limits is an act of self-love. You’re doing great! 💛
@@Psych2goneeded to here this thank you so very much great video and videos you do god bless you ✝️
Oh man I hate the guilt tripping these highly anxious people do. It's never intentional so you can't even be mad at them
Man I wish I could do that too, I always worry so much about others I'm unable to tell them I'm not currently okay enough to be vented to because I worry it's smth serious they need to tell me or that they will need my help, but this sure is exhausting... it's that I don't care about my loved ones, but I do avoid them at times simply cause I can't take more emotions on me. The other night I even bursted in tears while I listened to someone I love, I couldn't help calling myself useless, angry at myself I couldn't figure out a way to help them yet, I got desperate, crying in the call, I'm on edge that's for sure, I really need to calm down, I guess I might be burnt out after all, but it's hard not to think I'm simply being selfish...
1:11 Strong sense of responsibility over others' emotions and suffering
2:17 Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected
3:00 Isolating yourself from others
3:43 Feeling angry, sad or depressed
4:34 Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts
4:57 Inability to concentrate or be productive
You are not weak, you have been strong for a long time. I relate to all of these signs and if you do to your not alone❤❤❤
Thank you
Yep, all of them. Thank you, I wish you well ❤❤
Thank you
@arbaizac11ditto v.v
Well I stopped caring. And cut out 90% of the people I knew. A lot only came to me if they needed help, and rarely to spend a nice time. Life is better now.
my mom drains me so much it’s so hard. She randomly starts talking about how life turns out sad and depressing because youth ends and dreams die literally everyday sometimes right when I wake up. She gets mad when I don’t respond the way she wants, laughs at her jokes or let’s say im already focused on doing something and she decides to explain a movie she’s watching in which I have no desire to start watching mid way she calls me rude then gets up and leaves. It’s so so hard
Dude, that's awful, do you have your dad or any other understanding family members? If yes, please talk to them if your mother is being so mean. They will surely help you out.
I take care of my mom and it's the same thing I experience. Not to mention we could be talking about something benign and she'll start bringing up stuff that she's experienced and trauma dumping. It's exhausting and she wonders why I don't sit with her all day. I need a break from it and she makes me feel bad for not sitting with her all day for her to dump more on me.
Sorry that I'm not going to use punctuation because I'm using speech to text Your mom sounds exactly like what I'm suffering of but I remember to distance myself and not make my problems others issues and what I mean by that is quite literally I have gotten upset and started yelling at people because I think they're looking at me the wrong way or they're ignoring me when they're not it's paranoia I'm having to go to therapy to unlearn this unhealthy thought process that isn't logical and he's only based off of emotion and no it's not as easy as it sounds otherwise I would have had this issue squashed by now so I can try to understand where your mom's headspace could be at but at the same time don't take this out on your kid I don't even have kids so I don't get it but all I know is that if I had a parent dealing with what I had I would feel the same way can you ask relatives if your mother might be suffering from something making her behave this way or is this just her natural way of behaving she sounds like she needs to go to therapy just like I'm doing right now because I cannot control my emotions and the paranoia I feel and I really put myself In Harm's Way today thinking the people around me are trying to hurt me I've got an upset on numerous different occasions with the littlest things a look could set me off for the next couple of hours because I'm convinced of something that's not true because that's how my brain wants to perceive things when in reality that's not how the world Works she shouldn't act like this with a child I think she should be going to therapy like me this is why I don't want to have children anytime soon my issues cannot be implemented onto the kids I might have
So this is it... I have been giving people too much attention, and helping them, but then, I almost get nothing in return.....I sometimes feel nothing, im always focused on people, and yet, I never focus on myself....I feel like I cant do anything for them, yet, I still try so hard to help them.... I guess I am burned out....(and also ty for another vid, they helped me so much, especially with other people and even myself)
It sounds like you’ve been giving so much of yourself, and it’s completely okay to feel burnt out-it just shows how deeply you care. But remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking time to focus on yourself isn’t selfish; it’s necessary. We’re so glad the videos have helped you-don’t forget, you deserve the same care and love you give to others. 💛
@@Psych2go Thank you for showing me that I cant do stuff if I am not well. I think you are right about the fact I need to take care of myself. If I am not well, I wont be able to do anything. Thank you so much:)
I think that's why I deleted so many of my social media apps this past year, along with pulling away from folks I had been supportive of for years, but never really received the same type of support or empathy in return.
I was gradually getting more resentful. The resentment triggered more passive aggressiveness in me, and that eats away at my own empathy. It becomes a vicious cycle and just adds to the depression.
So then I find myself pulling away from everyone. I feel "guilt" over the growing resentment and anger, and don't really know what else to do, except isolate. I can still feel empathy towards others, but it's more guarded now, since it feels like it never gets appreciated, if we give it out too easily.
I feel the same. I ended up isolating myself from everyone to rest, recharge and protect myself. Then I realized that I was also waiting to receive some compassion in return. I received nothing and now I don't expect anything anymore from anyone but I have some resentment that I really would like to get rid of.
I'm sorry I'm leaving you a comment that speech to text but I'm so glad that you left a comment and decided to voice the way you feel I guess because I was just explaining this to my mother I didn't have the right words but I was explaining to her about how empathy feels in my mind and the last couple of years throughout my entire life I have seen and felt slowly my empathy levels slowly go down more and more and it's like I'm guarding my empathy behind a door because I know I still have it I'm not a sociopath I still feel for other people when certain events but at the same time I don't want to feel empathetic for other people anymore nobody I've ever met deserves s*** I don't compliment anybody anymore because the last couple of times worked up the courage to talk to somebody and told them how amazing they looked or how awesome their shoes were and every single individual in the last couple of years only tells me that they know or looks at me and disgust and tells me to go away why the actual f*** what I care about any stranger that has to talk to me anymore I know that I don't mean anything to the rest of you and I'm just another person and if people compliment me nowadays I really don't want to believe them honestly I don't think anybody wants to be a decent nice person anymore and anything anybody has to say anymore is condescending I see it like this way online all the time so it's kind of almost be the same way and in real life I'm just done trying to be nice to people I know that I don't have Ill-will for people but i don't understand what the point of being nice has anymore, why do I need to?
@@mar420.74 I understand. Hang in there. Keep following this channel. Maybe it will help.
Being honest I feel like I might have empathy burnout. Even since childhood I always was this very emotional and empthatic guy. I always tried my best to help others, I always feel bad for others suffering, I felt sad for things like wars on the world or seeing hurt animals. To be honest I was never special in anything, only thing I was good at was being empthatic and helping others feel better. I have been dealing with my own traumas for years and lately I feel like something inside me have died. I feel like my emotions and empathy gone and I am scared it will never come back. I feel terrible with it. Its like I lost the biggest part of myself. Your video help me understand a bit about this thank you ❤
Thank you for sharing this-it’s clear how deeply you care, and that’s a beautiful part of who you are. Empathy burnout can feel like losing yourself, but it doesn’t mean your emotions and empathy are gone forever. It’s a sign that you’ve been carrying so much for so long, and now it’s time to focus on healing and caring for yourself. Have you thought about small ways to recharge or give yourself the same compassion you give to others? You’re not alone in this, and you’re still that kind, empathetic person at your core. ❤💛
@@Psych2go thank you it means a lot for me
Stay emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually fit.
God bless
🙏🏻🇺🇲🖤
@@drdesu5312 You will be your old self again after you have recharged and heal. Your empathy is not forever lost. It's like an MP bar in a video game, it'll take time to recharge, but you have to NOT use MP abilities for a while.
Also...Kakyoin has one of the coolest JoJo themes. 👍
For a very long time I thought I was behaving selfishly, I used to be a very empathetic person. But I stopped being one because it was very tiring for me. I couldn't explain my feelings to my friends, which often lead to quarrels between us. Thanks to this film, my remorse eased. Thank you.
one night i was scrolling through my phone, feeling like i’d never figure out why some people just seem so magnetic. then i came across this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and something about it caught my attention. reading it was like turning on a light in a dark room. it’s not about pretending to be someone you’re not; it’s about unlocking the energy you already have. trust me, this book is worth every page
What is it with this practically non-existent book getting bot spammed in every comment section of these videos?
I might give that a go sometime, perhaps this year.
I don't usually read, do you think this book is popular enough to be at my local library hahaha?.. 😅 This read sounds therapeutic
Can you guys make a video about the significant impact loneliness can have on us? And how hurtful it can be to say to someone "you have to learn to enjoy your own company sometimes!" Or "spend time with yourself!" When thats what you do all day every day for months or years, that is not helpful advice. We are social creatures and we need to socialize. Its such an agonizing feeling...
You’re absolutely right-loneliness can have such a profound impact on us, and it’s a topic that deserves more attention. Those kinds of comments, though well-meaning, can sometimes feel dismissive when someone’s been isolated for so long. Thank you for sharing this-your perspective is so important, and we’ll definitely consider making a video on this. You’re not alone in feeling this way, and we hear you. 💛
Stay emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually fit.
God bless
🙏🏻🇺🇲🖤
I'm literally crying, because this is what has been happening to me since last year, I always was the helping empathic person in any context, but constantly thinking about others added with pent up stress from life this past year has turned me into someone who just feels like staying by himself, I really wish to go back to the person I used to be but I just cannot bring myself to that anymore, I feel exhausted at just the thought of spending time with someone that might unload all their problems onto me, but I also feel lonely like never before in my life.
Just wanted to share because I have no other outlet since this thing is really hard to explain to people in our everyday life.
Take care ❤
I'm so tired of always being the responsible one. I'm tired of my emotional pain causing others around me to need my comfort when I need it too. I just want to be taken care of sometimes too. But apparently it's too much of a burden for my friends...
I need to clock out and take a break... thanks for making this, I needed to hear it.
I’m a people pleaser on a slow going road to recovery. Friends will ask me to go out the following day, even after hearing FROM ME that I’m sick - while we’re already out, and I’ve sacrificed time I could’ve been in bed getting much needed rest, but I still came out bcuz my friends “needed me there”…
I wish I could simply and easily just tell them “I’m sick and I’m choosing me.” but I’m so afraid of their potential reactions that I just end up bottling it up and looking for excuses to get out of things.
I just dealt with something very similar yesterday...with my son (19). I am now blocked on all available platforms. He's cut me off because I am exhausted and sick. I wasn't able to jump to his needs/wants. No one ever considered the way I feell
Stay emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually fit. And you can advise others to follow, but you can't force it.
God bless
🙏🏻🇺🇲🖤
Sometimes people we call friends lack the emotional maturity - we have friends that check only some boxes and some are around for fun times and honestly I value them. But mature ones should be able to understand when someone says they need "me time" or even offer to do nothing with you. I struggle with this myself, resenting some that don't even ask me how I am doing but I try to help so much. I realize they just aren't emotionally mature due to numerous issues. I still like them for who they are. I still struggle with resentment when people don't act like me and constantly have to remind myself that we are all different with different backgrounds.
Ive been dealing with a narcissistic ex who constantly reaches out through burner numbers to contact me. He constantly trauma dumped on me, and I vicariously listened. Even after he cheated on me I stuck around for a bit. He has drained me to my core. Im normally pleasant to be around, empathetic, giving, and listening. And he took full advantage of all of my kindness. I noticed ive been getting extremely angry over the smallest things and have been questioning my self-worth and how ive become this way… thank you sm for this video. It gave me so much clarity and I need to completely cut contact with my ex if I want to restore my sanity.
I don't wish to change, I wish there were more of us.
Not gonna lie.. I was on the verge of crying whit how much this represent the last 10 years of my life.. I had tears in my eyes by the end of it. I started taking more care of myself about 2 years ago.. but it's honestly still hard to cope whit it even if I do see improvement.. The more the video went the more relatable it was... but I didn't really know something like ''empathy burnout'' was a thing... I might look at some stuff another way after hearing this... Thanks.
I am going to therapy and I have clearly told my psychologist that I think I am emotionally exhausted. In the before session, she took me to an orphange and told how grateful I must be because I have what they do not have. I know that she didn't mean to compare the struggle, but I felt guilty for not being able to be empathetic or grateful... Now, I am unable to feel anyone and myself too...
It’s so brave of you to acknowledge how you’re feeling and to seek therapy. It sounds like your psychologist may have been trying to offer perspective, but it’s completely valid to feel the way you do. Emotional exhaustion can make it hard to feel empathy or gratitude, and that’s okay-it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. Have you had a chance to share these feelings with your psychologist? It might help to talk about how this experience made you feel. 💛
@@Psych2go Thanks I needed this...
Fire your therapist. I’m sure that they wanted to add some perspective, but it should not be at the cost of invalidating your feelings and burnout.
I’m really surprised they did this. The whole point of therapy is trying to figure out what it is you’re feeling and what the root cause of those feelings are so you can address them and care for them. Instead they tried to give you a different perspective and essentially said “cheer up, it could be worse”. I’m so sorry this happened to you, it must’ve felt invalidating and made you feel guilty, which is the exact opposite of what you need right now. This therapist may not be the right fit for you, but I encourage you to tell them what you’re feeling before looking elsewhere.
This is so me, I usually care for ppl during my junior high school era, always listened to my friends story even anonymous ppl online back then, and during early high school I slowly can't really feel the care for others, when my friend cried, I somehow didn't comfort her or hug her, I feel quite numb? .. and when I'm with my friends, I show emotions but I'll get really tired, and slowly I distant myself from my friends till late high school now, and yea, when my friends vented to me.. I can't feel the same empathy I had before..
I'm an empathetic person growing up but as i grow i become less empathetic because i always listen but never been listened to and given comfort..not even from my parents,so maybe this is the reason why i understand now,thank you❤
Thank you so so much. I’ve recently suffered with this, too, especially since I have and have had friends who’ve had very horrible and traumatic experiences. And I’ve always been there as a shoulder to cry on, and I’ve tried to empathise as best I could. But in the end, I have nothing left to give. Thankfully, my family and friends have helped by giving me some space, and I’ve been starting to look after myself. But yes people, please don’t do this to yourself, especially if you get nothing back in return.
I was literally just trying to look up how I was feeling and then I found your video. The timing is crazy.
Timelapse:
1:11 - Strong sense of responsibility over others emotion and suffering
2:17 - Feeling emotionality numb or diaconnected
3:00 - Isolating yourself from others
3:43 Feeling angry and sad and depressed
4:34 - Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts
4:57 - Inability to Concentra or be productive
This is so true and important 🙌 it is okay that you just cannot solve all those problems. You can offer what you are able to but there is a boundarie. You are worthy enough to look at your energy first.
this is an insightful video. To me emphasizing wasn't something I naturally got, but forced to use to cope with my difficult upbringing. Why I had such a difficult dad, why my mum wants to stay and wants me to be "happy". My mum always loved me but my dad was selfish in what he wanted. I do see why he does what he does and what made him to be who he is. But it led to burnout where I realised there was nothing in my power to change them despite how much I tried to understand them. It taught me how complicated life can be and no matter how much you can understand them you wont ever be able to handle to relate.
I thought I had accepted this and moved on when I found my ex but the cycle ended up starting again where there was situations that I knew I couldnt control why she did what she did. I realised 2 things.
1. After so many years of being in an impossible situation where I wasnt getting enough attention and love from my dad, and anything I said to try and help was used against me, I dont know how to comfortably share my worries.
2. I more or less got with my ex who turned out to be very similar to my dad. Someone who loves to say the right answer but doesnt act on it. And when issues came up would jump on me to do something about it and respond selfishly when I dont have anything positive to say.
I dont despise her, I hold strong feelings for her, maybe because I feel like there was something I still couldve done. But I knew at the time I had to break it off with emotional burnout and not being able to comprehend how to handle what she wanted from me.
I scoffed thinking this couldn’t be what I was feeling until watching the video, and it fits so well with a multitude of experiences, current and previous. Thank you for the great content, as always. Have a lovely year.
I’ve been watching your videos for a while and they help me a lot with my anxiety
Thank you. This has helped me. I have taking on the responsibilities of others. Mostly my mom for too long. Im exhausted 😢 i feel selfish for not being able to help even with the smallest task but this video helped me so much ty
i remember feeling like i was always the one fading into the background while others stood out effortlessly. it was frustrating and made me doubt myself a lot. then i came across this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it showed me things i’d never even considered. it’s not just a self-help book; it’s like a guide to understanding your own energy and using it to connect with people. if you’ve ever felt like you’re not seen, this book might change everything.
I have a friend that's unknowingly taking advantage of my empathy right now. Always anxious, new crisis every other day, I'm pretty sure they have borderline personality disorder. Their struggles are legitimate but hearing about them every single day is exhausting.
Because I’m an introvert, I’m experiencing the WORST case of empathy burnout. I’ve been emotionally exhausted since I escaped an abusive relationship with a covert narcissist. Actively volunteering and engaging in self care keeps me grounded, but the second someone interacts with me (even on a surface level) it immediately exhausts me. I’ve been holding space with myself ever since and will continue to, I’m just so overwhelmed with everyone treating me like a therapist and trauma dumping on me.
The best quote i heard about Empaty was:“Empaty is good for helping other‘s, but it can‘t Save yourself“
With everything that's been going on lately in my personal and professional life, this.... helped a lot more than i thought it would. It hit every major feeling I've felt for a couple months now, and explains it in a way that feels correct to the feeling. Perhaps i should take a small break. I've been worrying a lot.
I can't believe the timing of this. I am at a loss. Thank you.🙏
Switching the approach from trying to solve other peoples’ problems myself to trying to help them solve their own problem not only helped me preserve my own well being but also made it easy to identify those who try to establish an emotionally parasitic relationship
So this is what I've been going through. When I was younger, I used to be so much more compassionate and optimistic. I like to think I still am, but its just so more diluted now than it was back then. I think my old status as the therapist-friend in highschool took a huge hit on my empathy battery. I honestly thought I was just being more selfish than usual, and I felt so guilty for it a lot of times... this put so much into perspective, thank you
Resonates infinitely but in my life setting any boundary leads to cuss outs and threats or sometimes just plain absolute ignored... no family, no friends, 4 kids (he makes it feel like 5), no direction... the burnout feels deliberate.
Thank you for this video i also had all these problems of my self when ppl i used to listen to tell me that ive been ignoring them and i also distant my self from them I've been crying every night bcz i thought im becoming selfish i didn't want to talk to ppl thinking none of them would undestand im literally in tears bcz this has given me some hope thank you so much
I think this is/has happened to me and I’m still trying to reacharge! I have been for 2-3 years now without know till now
I keep forcing empathy through to the point I CANT care anymore.
Like if you took you dead phone. Put it on charge then took it off at 3% and used it till it died again
And do that over and over and over again!
Yoooooooo, I needed this! Years ago I left a community I was close to but I couldn't explain why I had to leave despite the people there being long time friends.
It turns out it was empathy burnout, and though it seemed like I nuked myself unnecessarily from the community, that was the ONLY boundary I could do, as the community kept gathering people with a victim mentality.
For so long after that I thought I became cold, lost the empathetic warm self of mine since, as doomed to be alone.
But then I found a new community and am slowly regaining my empathy back, while having hard boundaries now that I understand more of what I need to take care of myself.
Crazy vindication
I have been feeling exhausted for a long time, I want to let everything go... but there is no quiet and free place for me to cry with satisfaction :(
Timestamps
1). Strong sense of responsibility over others' emotions and suffering 1:09
2). Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected 2:15
3). Isolating yourself from others 2:58
4). Feeling angry, sad, or depressed 3:41
5). Difficulty sleeping or constant racing thoughts 4:30
6). Inability to concentrate or be productive 4:55
Hope this helps you out. Hope you have a nice day. Sorry this is so late. 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Listening to almost the end, I caught myself thinking. As a child, I devoted all my attention to friends and games, was impulsively unstable, etc., experienced bullying from classmates and unpleasant conversations with parents. And now I am that teenager who has had the biggest and most unpleasant changes in life, I realized that I don’t care about anyone, that I have problems with concentration and not having time to do anything, worse memory, etc. And I’m not sure that this will be fixed, but I think I will just be a lonely person who no one will help.
The timing is scarily perfect. I've always feel like I'm responsible for others emotions or feel like everything is my fault. It's difficult to just make time for yourself when people sees that wrongly like seeing me as a narcissistic person or selfish. I seriously want to just isolate myself from everything but school and work won't let me do that. It's exhausting 😭
i remember this one time i felt like no matter what i did, people just didn’t notice me. i tried everything-confidence boosters, social tips, you name it-but nothing seemed to work. then i found this book, Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it completely shifted how i saw myself. it’s not just about being noticed; it’s about understanding the energy you project. honestly, this book made all the difference for me. if you’ve ever felt invisible, you need to read it.
6 out of 6 thanks for another great informative video. What's frustrating is when you set boundaries and people guilt trip you saying things like I just wanted to vent or can't I can't on you
haha it did not just EMOTIONALLY resonate with me, it found me. lately I’ve been so burned out because of my friends problems and how I had to be their “ear.” I mean me personally, I’m very empathetic, and watching this video just made me realize it’s not me, it’s empathy burn out. Thank you so much oh my gosh . :(
I have emotionally, physically, and even monetarily, when i could, supported everyone around me for most of my life. It was a personality trait that was nurtured and i think it also because a survival mechanism during the hardest years of my life so far. I have been draining myself little by little each year, almost got taken out by a narcissist, and I would handle everyone else's problems except my own. It took taking in a friend in who was going to be homeless to show me just how low I was on that energy and how I never really took the tome to refill it. I felt guilty when I had to set boundaries so i wouldnt be taking on everyone else's problems.
Feeling empathy for others and worrying about /helping others also can be a way to avoid helping ourselves which feels infinitely harder to do.. I've analyzed this about myself. I go through a pattern of helping others and focusing on them because no one else is and I CAN, but all along I really should focus on myself. It's far easier to help others for me, but it is me who I should be helping all along and id be willing to bet money this happens to so many people.
One motto I came up with is: take a break before you break.
I've been isolating from humanity these past few years because I was not only experiencing burnout, but also had a lot of work to do on myself from the inside out. I was overstimulated for such a long time, it took me thousands of hours to recover from it. I had to separate my past from my present and learn to move on in a healthy way. I had to learn hundreds of little details to build a proper framework of stability in my life. Of course, moving to a small town and cutting many people out of my life helped as well, people that didn't belong there in the first place. I don't even miss them anymore. I also had to door slam my own mother for many good reasons, but that's a whole big thing in and of itself. I'm getting better slowly but surely. I've done plenty of healing over the past few years, but still have far to go.
I'm exhausted from OTHER people bringing me down!
I check all the boxes. I'm so relieved to have a word for this feeling, now, instead of thinking bad things about myself. Not sure how I'm going to fill my cup yet without detaching from my loved ones though...
The way the 4 recent uploads have been so relevant to my life….
I'm on stress leave....diagnosis Burnout/Compassion Fatigue...work in a caring field..
Been told I have a big heart usually
I know people who've been physically, verbally and sexually abused. Things got to the point where they were exhausting for me. My life wasn't ever going so great but I always smiled and stayed positive. I still do but people aren't going to sob in my lap anymore than I'll tolerate now. I needed a break, a long break
This video just slapped me in the face... this is exactly what I'm experiencing at the moment.
Thanks a lot guys, I needed this video❤ Now I can understand more things about me end my actual emotional, mental and productivity state and why every night I can’t go to bed before 2 am even though I have to wake up early the next day.
Thanks. Again 🙏❤️
Wow psych2go I’m impressed with how you’ve read my mind. I’ve never heard of this anywhere else nor on this channel but this was the reason I ended a 3 year relationship in 2023 .
I still feel terrible about it to this day. I thought I was nuts. I very much appreciate this video
Thank you so much for validating my feelings and experience. I thought I am just being a victim and just not strong enough. This makes me really bad about myself. I now have a term to call it. I do have Empathy burnout 😭. The sudden disconnection really scared me and I thought I devolved into something or someone horrible....
Great video! I wish more people would empathize with us Empaths. Let's all look out for each other. 😊🙏🏾❤️
Thank you hopefully this will explain how i feel better than i can say with words myself. Im drained to the max and i cant do it anymore after living a whole life taking care of a mentally unwell family and addicted parents who all always play the victim. Im exhausted beyond belief and getting snappy (desperate for healthy boundaries) but the following guilt and backlash is too much to bare.
there was a time when i kept wondering why some people seemed to naturally draw others in while i was just…there. no matter what i tried, i couldn’t figure out how they did it. then someone mentioned the book Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and i decided to check it out. the way it explains how your aura affects everything around you? it blew me away. it’s like having a secret code to unlock your magnetic energy. this book is a game-changer.
Yes and I started having empathy burn out 9 months ago(and still going through it) and I was extremely apathetic and didn't care about anyone now I'm doing okay I'm not as apathetic but instead of feeling no empathy I'm feeling 40% percent of my empathy coming back.
i used to think being magnetic was just about looks or confidence, but i couldn’t have been more wrong. i read this book called Magnetic Aura by Takeshi Mizuki, and it totally changed my perspective. it breaks down the energy and mindset behind true attraction in a way that just makes sense. once i started applying what it taught, i noticed people reacting to me differently almost instantly. it’s seriously worth a read.
I had a lot of these symptoms/signs🌹 Thank you for making this video🌹 I'll take the advice and do better for myself🌹
Why her voice is so attractive
There is nothing wrong on giving.
Setting bounderies is not being selfish. It is self care.
Most takers have no limit. They just keep on taking and sometimes they make you feel guilty if you dont give.
Before you give, think twice if that person would also do the same for you.
Its give and take.
Its ok to give but dont expect anything else in return.
If someone doesnt give you the same time/energy/effort that you give, dont be disrouraged. Not all people are as kind hearted as you are.
Give, but set bounderies.
Give only as much as they would give you.
Narcissists would take advantage of you but thats life. Next time, dont give them any, then move on.
I had an experience where my old classmate injured his leg because he thought it was a bright idea to jump at the staircase. The school was closing so there is no one at the infirmary. I lend him his shoulder from school to his home.
When we got home, his father blamed me for what happened instead of thanking me for helping his stupid son.
Around a year later, that same classmate did a disgusting prank at me which is a long story so I'll skip it.
I bet if I got my leg injured, he wouldnt do the same for me.
Set bounderies. Its not selfish to have bounderies. Some people are not worth your time/energy/effort.
🙏🏾 for those in Customer service ❤
+?-+++
(+:yes -:no ?:sometimes)
I feel more fatigued than last school year. It's not because of people in school but too many things that i can't even explain..
I’ve recently been feeling really “emo” and want to help but can’t even if I am right there. I thought I was just being selfish but I guess I have my answer now. Thanks
Finding it hard to focus, blundering about big time, making mistakes here there and everywhere, now I know why I end up like this 3 or 4 times a year. 😮
I just had a conversation with my housemates about me feeling totally emotionally drained and this really relate to alot of my problems right now, I feel angry about others having problems now while I always have been there for others.
I feel like this is my case. I usually feel numb hearing terrible news. I then break down crying later that day. Sometimes it takes days before I start to cry over loss. I care. It's just that it doesn't hurt me anymore.
I feel those all...😢😢😢Thank You❤
I've never had no sympathy for no one, never shown love to anyone at all. I'm just cold and emotionless towards everyone because I don't want to let my guard down for nobody and I don't want nobody to come near me because I'm just too selfish with everything
You wouldnt really be here if you didnt care, and the fact you care just means that theres a third factor stopping you from empathising
@isaacbatgamer9958 Like what?
I feel like this is totally where I'm at in my life right now I appreciate your video it was really insiteful
Use to have that, empathy burn out... especially this year since my friend had depression... i went through depression... and my friends left me. Now i stopped caring about people. It only brought me to pain.
I'm going through this exact thing and I think of others so much. I cry for others and I try to fix things that I know I can't and I'm currently drained by this feel of empathy of the ones I love even when they hurt me 💔😢 but I am going to pull through and whatever obstacles come my way I'm going per server and do my best no matter what bc God has a plan for me and things are going to be okay 👌🥹
I be so sick and tired of folks fr it dont even worth be trying
It sounds like you’ve been dealing with a lot, and it’s okay to feel tired and drained. Remember, it’s okay to take a step back and focus on yourself. You deserve peace and people who pour into you just as much as you pour into them. What’s one thing you can do for *you* today? 💛
I used to care much much more but these days I just don't feel anything. It's kind of liberating, actually.
It's easy to say "set boundaries" or "prioritize your own mental health".
But if a person relies on you to give them hope, strengh and consolation, you can't just walk away and say "I need a few days to recharge, see you next week, don't kill yourself in the meantime pls :)"
I wish this video came out when I was with my ex. I was so exhausted hearing about their problems (and dealing with the emotions of people from my old job), I disconnected myself and it led to a lot of arguments and crippling self-hatred for not being a better friend/partner.
Thank you 💚
Some of my friends just complain too much. And I say it to them straight. And try to talk about something positive
I do my best to listen and comfort others. My has is a Retired Army Vet, my live-in Mother-in-law has dementia and a double amputee. My own Mother passed 13 yrs ago. My boys (19 & 23) have moved out, but the youngest still thinks i should leave my Husband so i can take care of him. I do my best to xare for everyone, but i cant fix any of them. Yet, everything is my fault. Yesterday, I told my youngest i wasn't feeling well and couldnt get together for lunch. After he told me how insensitive I was, etc, he ended uo blocking me from our only methods of communication. He's mad because I wouldnt fold under the pressure, nor respond to his hateful comments. I'm just exhausted. I dont have it in me, at the moment, to junp and bend to everyone else's needs/wants. Yet, I'm the selfish and poor me, for choosing a dayvto stay in bed for rest and recovery 😢
Can you do a video on focusing on your mental state so much you feel almost self centered in a way?
(Commented this on another video but it fits here too so,)
I worked at a community resource centre for a year. It was fun for the most part, and I generally love helping people and making them smile. However, it began to weigh down on me, not that I blame anyone at all. It’s just that the people I was working with were going through a hard time, and the same could be said for my coworkers. I let one person trauma dump on me, and I straight up started crying right in front of them because their backstory was so messed up, that was probably disrespectful of me, and I’m still embarrassed that I couldn’t control myself. Eventually, I left quietly, but some of the people I worked with remember me fondly, so at least I did something right.
Honestly this is very much how I feel..
I deeply needed this...Also, first...
I spent about 2 hours sitting in my truck (it's winter time) after work last night because I knew I could not take going in the house and being bombarded with things. Be it my wife, our youngest son, the three neighborhood cats that I feed that were probably waiting for me on the porch, out of food. It seems like some nights when I get home it's an hour of doing/giving/helping before I can even relax myself. Our oldest son came home Christmas Eve last year to unload on me about his relationship problems. My boss' wife recently left him and he's been talking to me about that. It's one person after another, but I have to be there for them. Even though it is probably going to kill me.
I was feeling like i was living a lie
I always thought i was considerate and empathetic and lately wondering...have i changed??
You every video is perfect
At this stage right now, I feel so burnt out and dry..
I was literally thinking earlier today of how crappy it's been lately, I felt like I was in going from being way too empathetic to the point of being dragged around, to being a complete sociopath, changing from one to the other every hours, hell between interactions even.
I can really relate to a lot of the symptoms here, and it makes me glad im starting fresh at a new college next fall. Less people to worry about immediately, a fresh opportunity, and a good chance to stop feeling burnt for once. (I've felt burnt for a LONG time now, but only really isolated myself and felt depressed.)
Though if anything, im probably a little bit insane due to how this past year ended, though, who isn't slightly crazy in the film industry?
I feel like this video was made for me. It hit every sign right on the head. Funny because I was just talking to my partner about this today.
This makes more sense to me having depression.
This is me at the moment, but how can you self-care and put up boundaries when there's no one around to take on your caring burden?
I needed a psych2go video about our own feelings again right about now. Not a good year so far, my friend unalived herself yesterday 😢