Namskar sir Really heart touching practical behaviour of parents. Their ambitions never end,the son who achieved better'position with hard work has to support till he alive,the nalayak other sons expects financial support. The reality in the society, explained well.The points are to be discussed and forwarded to families Thanks sir
I can relate this to my father's life. He dedicated large chunk of his life for taking care of parents and siblings, and later was thrown out by same peoole.
@@VikashSingh-vp6zl god had watched him. Dnt wry. God ll gve him 1k times more. Ache karmo ka fll jrur milta hai.. Chahe agle janam me shi.... Dnt wry
@festivevibes23 I'm facing a similar situation. My uneducated mother is deliberately rude to me, even though her elder son took out a loan that was paid off using my father's pension, and her other son is an alcoholic who has driven the family to bankruptcy. I've done nothing wrong and still continue to do nothing wrong, yet the person who brought me into this world has become my greatest enemy.
100% accurate.. I was that boy ( I don't know how much good) .. But I had done a lot of return after I started doing bit better in jobs.. I kept handling full families expenses.. However.. I had my eyes opened already due to God given wisdom, high justice loving nature and my wife's advice, I turned back at right time. Did investment on myself and my immediate family..Your advice is reassurance that I am on right track. You are doing very great service by giving advice in art of managing family and setting all expectations correctly. What a wonderful niche you selected.. Thank you so much for being like Guru.
One point u missed here, sometimes parents dominate marriage decision of their good son completely in order to satisfy their ego in society. leading to tremendous sadness to son and calling it sons fate if son is unhappy after marriage
I am female, working as Director in Govt. department. My in-laws and their other relatives never recognized me as an officer. Because they allwere group C . My father in law introduce me as 'she is assistant director' Why our society never admire strong woman as bahu. Now I am 54 . But still I get annoyed with their peculier attitude. All other female members of the family are housewives and although I am better in household duties and take male responsibilities , they admire mediocre bahus. What is this phenomena?? I wonder.
They are useless jealous people. Stay away from them and keep interactions to minimum. Many middle class people will not give any credit to working bahu but enjoy her income
Its jealousy ma'am ...........for happiness......ignore them.........don't give this thoughts place in memory.........ultimately life never promised it gone be fair...........
I strongly recommend to never reveal your entire salary to anyone, not even your spouse. If at all you wish to be honest, tell your monthly salary after tax deduction and EPF+VPF deduction and other tax savings methods you may use such as PPF or home/education loan. So if you get 1 lakh/month on paper, tell your salary as maybe 70,000 or 75,000 per month (after tax and tax saving deductions). Always underplay your salary. This becomes even more crucial when your parents have a habit of revealing your life to their relatives and friends.
It's very tough to hide income from wife as in digital age u get msg of every transaction but one thing you can do it invest your money in property gold sip stocks anywhere after keeping a lumsum money of at least 5 to 10 lakhs in bank for emergency, and always keep crying before your wife that you don't have money left after investment .
There is not even a single person on internet who can talk on topics like this. Tremendous work sir... Ek ek baat sachhi hai in your every video. Please write a book sir on these kinds of teachings.
@@debaprasad9379 stop watching one kind of content, try everything even if you don't know what it is. I'm not saying to force yourself to watch something else but have a mindset of trying something new everyday.
The video is amazing sir.. and great life lessons.. my life is also a very similar ...I am 45 and divorced now.. and my parents are no more..my advise to younger people , please take care of your life as a first priority.. don't be too good and try to make every one happy.. people will use you as a colour pencil to make their life colourful.. you must find a good paying career , a loving wife, have children , house and have connection with God.. you will find people who emotionally make you feel guilty , be very careful.. people you trust and love most will betray you..
@upworkprofileevideonoorula No loving wife in reality, girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status. Girls treat man ATM machine
I found it very much relatable with that of my father's life. He was the good boy of the family and our uncles are earning way less salary and respect than him. But he never got close with our grandmother but our uncles did and ultimately because of the tension in family he suffered from serious illness which ultimately took his life. You were on point sir.
This is my father ... my mother was also working ... Both did their best to uplift their respective families ... But it ruined our life ... My sister n me r extremely bitter with both sides of families n don't want to get married ever ... Relatives r the biggest burden
Same here, my parents did well for me not for my cousins. If his parents are unable yo provide them the life I am getting I am the privileged one not him. And then once I deny being ATM I am the bad one. Then let me be bad one now.
Is comment section m ek v ladki Nhi dekhige yhi problem h Jb EQUALITY ki bat ati h SALA EK LADKI KO UKRAINE NA CHODNE KA PAVANDI NHI LAGA HALA KI LADKE KM H LADKIO S .... BEST H SHADI MY KRO.....
My arranged marriage was the same. I belong to Rich family but got married to the below poverty line family bcoz my husband is Good, Simple and earning well. After marriage they forced me to leave my job as there was no need for such. And once I left the job, I found he was in debt 5 times of his salary. He cannot say No to his parents kyunki bahut takleef dekhi h un logo ne. I faced so many problems till I got another job. Still problems are there but at least I have some savings for my survival 😊
@saumyasrivastava If you are belonging to rich family it doesn't mean your father property belongs to you. Go check 100 houses ask hey girl did your parents give property to you. Answer is no. Then what is the point saying you are belonging to rich family. In reality men getting injustice
whatever he said in the video is 100% true, one of my uncles is an aeronautical engineer he started earning at the age of 23 and got married at the age of 30 with my aunt, he has been earning for the last 7 years and had nothing in the name of savings, did not own a house, a car or any asset, his family especially his mother was milking his money and his other siblings were beneficiaries, his family told him that they do not have any money to spend on his wedding so he had to bear all the expenses, his family also took dowry but neither bride nor groom knows till date what happened to that cash. But after getting married to my aunt he was able to book a flat within 2 years of their marriage and they both were able to save enough money to go on 2-3 trips every year, they are now enjoying their life cuz my uncle could see what was right and what was wrong, very late but still understood. Boys never think that your parents can't take advantage of you.
I can relate to this sir. But the problem is its too late now. I was on a same guilt trip and wanted to become provider for my family whatever I could. Now I am 38 and yet single. My parents didn't approve my relationship with my GF. Now everyone is settled in their lives, and I am alone and depressed, cursing my life everyday. And the fun part is my younger siblings don't care much and don't contribute much yet they are more close to my parents than me, because I could not deliver up to the expectations.
Expectations are endless. Stay away from them and start your life now. It is not too late. The more you are near them the more you will be living in guilt.
Bhai jb aap khud khush rahoge tabhi dusro ko kudh kr paoge , start your journey if it's giving you joyful & happy life . wish you a very happy life ❤️ & god gave you strength to overcome your problems
My husband is going through this I feel bad try not to fight but when I see injustice towards us from family I try to stop him 😢I love him and want him to be proud always .
👏👏👏👏 Nobody talks about these topics the way you do! I went through this scenario for around 20 years, got depressed, had many sessions for 10 months or so with a psychologist to learn to say “STOP I CANT DO MORE, I HAVE A PERSONAL AND FAMILY LIFE ALSO “ things got improved gradually…
This video should be circulated to all Indian families. It's so important that lot of youngsters gets into the trap of Seva. The life becomes so miserable that so many losses the conference and dumped by their own family.
Yup, but after sharing with anyone, most people with narrow minded will make comments to me like I'm being brainwashed with this or I'm getting away from Indian tradition and been influenced by western one. It's too complex bro
@@ygp47 I don't understand after getting married what's the role of parents. They should be only be in advisory role. After having 2 children and 17 years of marriage my mother still made me emotionally black mail to leave everything and take care of her. I emotional fool did it and now regretting. The damage has happened and no way I can fixed it.
I am 22 hailing from a small town in Bihar currently pursuing mbbs and brought up in lower middle class family..i hope I get the courage to send this video to my mother..your videos are such an eye opener
Awesome video. I wish this eye opener video released like 10 years ago. For all young lower middle class good boys/girls, which are moving to higher middle class, this is a treasure.
We all should understand parents r selfish. They don't care about future of their children. My sister is also falling in their trap n destroying her life.
My selfish cunning mom want me to work like serveht for her fav daughter she is brate now nothing no talent only fair and beautiful that everyone like. But i m dusky less beautiful but attractive highr iq level love studying highly ambitious and multi-talented. But got no support from faimly. She want me to be house wife stop being ambitious individuals and book warm . all those quality she want put in my young sister .i m happy and free from future responsibility i will never come home once i m succeed in life
@@shwetathakur4707 please try to stay away and keep some distance with her and don't leave your goal otherwise you'll lost yourself in her hands.. I'm also seeing these types of situations..
Feeling lucky to be born in a good family. My father act harsh on me only to make me work more hard and become successful. He has already enough savings to live like king along with his govt. pension therefore he has no greed for money. Only thing he wants to see is me standing on my own feet.
Yes I am a 35 year old female I am a chartered accountant I started working for good salary from the age of 25 My mom postponed my marriage till I was 32 with greed to swindle my income along with my younger brother While her son got married at 28 while he is 20% salary compared to me It is absolutely true
Are to aap love marriage kar lena tha. Par arrange marriage me to aapka shoshan hi hota. Job k sath bohot aur torture bhi bardaasht karna padta maa to phir bhi achhi hoti hai aap kanhi ja k dekho working women ki halat bhi bohot kharab hoti hai sasuraal mai torture zyada hota hai sasural ma compared to mauka. Kuch 10 %ko achhe family mile hai baaki ro rahe hai sab
Sad to hear that madam. That our own parents treat us like sona ka anda denewali murgi. Start your journey now. Believe in God and in you only. All the best. You will do well
So relatable to my husband. My in laws did all things as you said. Dudh ka karz and all things set in my husband's mind. Even after doing so many things, these parents demanding to return son's degree. They threw us out of family. Never be too good to anyone.
i agreed to your single word i am facing the same problem in my married life...i feel so so unsecured in my marriage....that make me feel very worried for my children's... .
I am from IIT and in the industry for 7 years. I can vouch that it's all true. Thanks to my father, he maintained a register. I used to hate him for that in the beginning but later that turned out to be a saviour from lot of disputes.
@@shrishri8898 bhai life ka koi hard and fast rule nahi hota aaj kal degree ki value nahi hai skills ki job hai.Mere sath ke pade hue bilkul low grade college se aaj 20 lakh ke package par hai
One thing i understood from this session is that never reveal your income , not even to your parents, if you're earning 30lakh pa tell them it's 20 and save the surplus.... As he said it all comes down to money, maintain a register for expenses of all sorts because only you are responsible for your future and happiness and no one else ....
especially not reveal to spouse, especially woman should take care of their finances, giving everything to husband landed my friend empty handed and divorced recently
101 % truth through which i have gone as a wife . Same happened. Now end he is 80 i sm 76 . AB PACHHATAYE HOT KYA JAB CHIDIYA CHUG GAYI KHET . BAS NAYE BACHHO YE PERFECT ADVICE HAI PL SUNO . SEVA JARUR KARO LEKIN KHUDAKO AAUR APANI JINDAGI BARBAD KARAKE NAHI . BE PRACTICAL AND LIVE HAPPILY FOR EVER .
Same thing happened with my father who had started to earn at the age of 16 and made a house for the family . My other uncle's though haven't done much but they are taking equal shares in property and after doing so much he hasn't got anything other than criticism from all.
Bhai same mere dad ke saath hua hai my dad started and established gold silver jewellery business and he is gave many gold silver to my uncle and also gave to two elder brother of him and all three had never returned anything to my dad even uncle toh ghr ka kharcha bhi nhi uthate my dad had paid their kid's school fee upto 12th also and the properties my dad bought also my uncle's are demanding.. I'm seeing my dad's sacrifice for family and my both uncle are just enjoying life with my dad's Money
@millionaire bro then did you or your father tok cunsoltation or not? Exp and good Cunsoltants can change ur father life, do u know(sorry for that kind of english)
Actually. And the demands doesn't end when a sibling especially daughter gets married. When this daughter comes to Mayka for 15-20 days, the food, fun, travel, gifts for all the her family etc. expenses are more than monthly expenditure.. 😢 The good son and the obedient Bahu has to make extra budget for that.. These parents want to go on trips, relatives in foreign countries invite them out of respect. Now they want their son to do all the expenses... Because they are dependent.. The good boy son doesn't take foreign trips himself as he wants to save for his own old age.. 🤦🏼♀️😂
True 👍 आपने बिल्कुल भी extreem नहीं बताया है, ऐसा लगा कि मेरे husband की ही story है, और बिल्कुल उन्होंने जॉब लगने के 10 साल तक शादी नहीं की,but शादी के बाद मेरे साथ हुए behaviour से एहसास हुआ कि घर वाले शादी नहीं करना चाहते थे, और हमारी शादी को 14 साल हो गए हैं husbsnd को आज भी एहसास नहीं है, उनके भाई बहनों की लाइन ही इतनी लंबी है कि खत्म ही नहीं होती
Biggest irony is that in coperate 50 lpa package is 1 to 1.5 lakh in hand not 30 lakhs mnc package are calculated in so much vague that 4 year stocks are calculated in single year CTC and package is inflated
This has blown my mind. Every sentence makes sence and is so practical. Yup in today's world, there are most of videos of about how to get successful.... How get to that last ladder of success but when people reach their, they have all knowledge about Professional stuff but never thought of what will happen to his social life when he gets along with it.
I have experienced the same. But whenever I have tried to convey/explain the same as a son, I was always be seen as mean by others including the parents. Thanks for sharing the video.
True insights 👌. Some parents are pressurising their good boys even after more than 10 or 15 years of marriage of their sibling for monetary helping them. And they themselves are fully supporting their nikkama child by all power and will. What about the life of good boy?
Being a Pakistani Chartered Accountant, i can imagine how true all the facts sir is quoting. everything is true 100%. meri shaadi 34 me ki parents me aor ab phadda hota hahaha paison ko ly kar...hahah
This is why I isolated myself from everyone (family, friends, etc.) once I became rich and started maintaining a low profile and pretend like I am just making enough money to make ends meet. No parents, no siblings, no relatives, no friends, no wife, no partners, no children. I am enjoying everything myself as I earned it all by myself! ;)
I'm planning the same, don't want kids and wife, I'll just enjoy my life, travel, meet new people, try their culture, instead of being miserable with a boring sad life, investing all my money on kids.
Sangwanji should be a guest lecturer at various universities all over the country to impart these precious life lessons to students so that they can make this country and society a better place to live in
Uncle how can you be so right and to the point in all topics. I have seen my friend suffering as his wife who is also doctor and has no father, she is doing everything for her mother and siblings at the stake for her marriage. My friend doesn't ask her income but to start family as he is already 38 but she doesn't want to think of kids till she settles down her siblings and her family is emotionally controlling her. Another patient of mine is working 15 hours after domestic violence in marriage and divorce. But even after working so hard for mother and brother they dont care. So many times parents put emotions trap and the obedient kid suffers. Hopefully parents understand that kids are not their lottery.
Hi sir ..u logics are life changing material. Pls make a vedio where mother in law has done a job through out her whole life but now bahu she wants job less just to take care of child , her family n relatives. This is my real life issue ..now m having two kids but doing nothing. If I want to raise my life again on track then she again n again interferes my decision n tells my husband very humbly that my husband always belive his mother not me. Wahi ghisa pita excuse ki bache kon dekhega ..n she's very smart enough to cover her evil feelings for me.
If you desire to do job, work on getting it otherwise your life will be hell in regret and frustration ,Even can give you mental issues in future My sister had same situation but she resisted second child,and now his son is 10 and she has joined the job,it helps her socialise,and be happy otherwise life as housewife can be frustratingly boring for many
Sir In your 3 rd Happiness course I during query time asked u one question. It is very similar to my situation. I am very relieved from this guilt trip now. I face emotional blackmail of my parents with logic and my comments are more articulate. I will watch it atleast 10 times more. Your effort is very visionary.. its benefits can be seen in long term when sukoon and stability comes in life. Relations remain entact by following ur advice. Your video why beta bahu should not live with in laws was legendary in my opinion. I am thankful I found u before I turn age 30. My pressure of doing good in sarkari naukari is also relieved. Ckakki peasing aaraam sai aur aanch ko kam kar do has given ultimate sukoon to me. Your advice is doing more good in society than all other reforms, as you are addressing issues which no one is discussing but where actually the root cause of problems lie. Regards
Each and every word is true Sir. Indian parents make the good boys do everything for them monthly expenses,gifts,marriages, new home etc their siblings and then for their kids. This go on for 10 20 yrs. Few understand and few think that their wife is there enemy. They will not give anything to the wife for years but will expect her to do everything for his family. Her married life is sacrificed in between. Harsh truth of many.
Literally sir, you are great.. Itna dil dukha hai mera video dekh ke.. Bahot relatable hai..ma bap bahot use karte hai bachhe ko.. Mere husband ko dekh rahi hai.. Bura lagta hai
South Asian parents are almost alike. I am suffering from the same situation. All the burden of financial support to family is put on my shoulders as a punishment to my hard work. Even the education of siblings has to be bore by me. Thank you for your help ☺️🙏🏼 Love from Pakistan 🇵🇰
Exactly the story of my life … high earning of my husband is actually a curse … his parents are just after his money … hamare beech kabhi understanding unhone banne nahi di …. Most times I feel better hota ek normal earning wale se shaadi hoti … dono husband wife mil ke kamate aur achi life jeete
@@Jaihindurashtra1igh earning has no limit. Jitna high utna hi kaam lagta hain. But for benchmark like I think, you can be having 1year or more emergency fund, not worrying about electricity bill and stuffs, can alot 5%-10% of your income to buy things for fun or out of need without worrying about savings, 20-40k phone looks very normal budget to you. And many more.
As a first time would be mom, I always think, what is the the right way. Kaha galti hui hai? Kisse hui hai aur mai kaise us galti ko apne bacche ke saath hone se rok sakti hun. How can we break this cycle? Maine ye video dekhn start hi is intention se kiya ki I will learn how to not let being good a curse on my son (if I have a son). Very helpful. I absolutely agree. Bacche hume kucch owe nahi karte. Mai Aaj keh rahi hun. Aaj se 30 saal baad bhi kahungi. We bring them into this world, we spend on their studies or give them the best we can for our own selfish reasons. That selfish reason can be love for our blood or our own desire to look good parents in the eyes of the society. Koi bhi insaan kahi door kisi anjaan ke naam pe paisa bhej de, use padha likha de, aur fir ummid kare ki maine kiya toh mujhe milna chahiye, toh shayad fair hai. Aur tab nahi mil raha toh aapne invest karne se pehle offer documents thik se padhe nahi. Bacchon ko apne budhaape ki laathi banana chhorna parega. Nahi toh woh bas kaath ke hi ho ke reh jaayenge. Ye chaahte ho apne jigar ke tukde se toh fir karo. Lage raho.
Thanks sir ji, each and every word is true.ur courageous sir. My son is studying iit patna, I understand what should not to do in future. Write book sir.
Really true...they suck too much in middle of your career or specially when you are trying side business...their demand is never fullfilled when you are in sortage of capital to setup business and you remain working for others whole life
I m the wife of this good boy. I left my job under inlaws pressure. My father in law wanted me to do well but all others were against.Sometimes fall in depression.
Though may sound a bit harsh to the majority but spot on sir!! The sooner both sides realize and take a practical view of things life would be better. Keep going with this lesser discussed topics. Best wishes.
Loved the topic sir ! Thouy i am not from a service class community, but can totally understand the complexity of this situation. As you always say - your topics are really interesting & true to life . They are preparing me for my future. Thank you so much.
U r my favourite youtuber sir.. being a jaat I can understand what u are trying to highlight.. it's really painful being a bahoo and beta in jaat families.. u r such a blessing.. I know abhi kuch humara to hona Jana nahi hai .. but yes change to aaiga..
Ek gyan yeh bhi De dein sabko ki package sabko batana obligation nahi hai. Initial bata bhi diya to aagei ke promotion etc par chup rehna seekhein. Parents or other relatives or friends don’t have to know ur package. Yeh india ki basic badatameez aadat hai to ask people’s packages. Yahan tak ki rah chalte driver, paanwale bhi pooch lete hain without a hitch . It’s an important confidential information. Please keep it to urself
Namskar sir
Really heart touching practical behaviour of parents.
Their ambitions never end,the son who achieved better'position with hard work has to support till he alive,the nalayak other sons expects financial support.
The reality in the society, explained well.The points are to be discussed and forwarded to families
Thanks sir
False dowry case daal kar chati ka dhoodh yaad dila sakti hai
Happiness
@@nationlove7738 phir toh ho liya.
Isss sentence ka aage koi court case nahi rukega
I can relate this to my father's life. He dedicated large chunk of his life for taking care of parents and siblings, and later was thrown out by same peoole.
Poochna papaji se...a gaya swad
@@VikashSingh-vp6zl god had watched him. Dnt wry. God ll gve him 1k times more. Ache karmo ka fll jrur milta hai.. Chahe agle janam me shi.... Dnt wry
@festivevibes23 I'm facing a similar situation. My uneducated mother is deliberately rude to me, even though her elder son took out a loan that was paid off using my father's pension, and her other son is an alcoholic who has driven the family to bankruptcy. I've done nothing wrong and still continue to do nothing wrong, yet the person who brought me into this world has become my greatest enemy.
100% accurate.. I was that boy ( I don't know how much good) .. But I had done a lot of return after I started doing bit better in jobs.. I kept handling full families expenses.. However.. I had my eyes opened already due to God given wisdom, high justice loving nature and my wife's advice, I turned back at right time. Did investment on myself and my immediate family..Your advice is reassurance that I am on right track.
You are doing very great service by giving advice in art of managing family and setting all expectations correctly. What a wonderful niche you selected.. Thank you so much for being like Guru.
One point u missed here, sometimes parents dominate marriage decision of their good son completely in order to satisfy their ego in society. leading to tremendous sadness to son and calling it sons fate if son is unhappy after marriage
Absolutely true
True.
Well said hats off
I am a victim of this.
True..
I am female, working as Director in Govt. department. My in-laws and their other relatives never recognized me as an officer. Because they allwere group C . My father in law introduce me as 'she is assistant director' Why our society never admire strong woman as bahu. Now I am 54 . But still I get annoyed with their peculier attitude. All other female members of the family are housewives and although I am better in household duties and take male responsibilities , they admire mediocre bahus. What is this phenomena?? I wonder.
They are useless jealous people. Stay away from them and keep interactions to minimum. Many middle class people will not give any credit to working bahu but enjoy her income
@@chandranem why do they admire secretly? Why can’t they say openly , why so much ego
Same
U must b arrogant
Its jealousy ma'am ...........for happiness......ignore them.........don't give this thoughts place in memory.........ultimately life never promised it gone be fair...........
Seedhi baat..no bakwas!!
Hats off to you Sir
Bakvas hai
Nikamme siblings ka life set karrna and sort out karrna is also the responsibility of the successful one. This is also one of the items :)
Yes you are absolutely right sir. And they never settle...
@@salimpasha1212 and makes life of the spouse/kids of successful one hell
@@salimpasha1212 well Said facing same issue
Aisa hi ho rha h mere sath b
Ohh..i thought ..m the only one have nikkama sibling
I strongly recommend to never reveal your entire salary to anyone, not even your spouse. If at all you wish to be honest, tell your monthly salary after tax deduction and EPF+VPF deduction and other tax savings methods you may use such as PPF or home/education loan. So if you get 1 lakh/month on paper, tell your salary as maybe 70,000 or 75,000 per month (after tax and tax saving deductions).
Always underplay your salary. This becomes even more crucial when your parents have a habit of revealing your life to their relatives and friends.
ur last line is so true
It's very tough to hide income from wife as in digital age u get msg of every transaction but one thing you can do it invest your money in property gold sip stocks anywhere after keeping a lumsum money of at least 5 to 10 lakhs in bank for emergency, and always keep crying before your wife that you don't have money left after investment .
Very True...you said brother
Me and my husband have done the same...we never disclose our salary
Agree.. i practice this
There is not even a single person on internet who can talk on topics like this. Tremendous work sir... Ek ek baat sachhi hai in your every video. Please write a book sir on these kinds of teachings.
Yup.... I'm hearing first time anything like this.
You guys should step out of the internet and see the real world
You're living in a box
@@debaprasad9379 stop watching one kind of content, try everything even if you don't know what it is. I'm not saying to force yourself to watch something else but have a mindset of trying something new everyday.
@@ShubhamGupta-kk2fv real world dekhna matlab kya?
Guruji aapne mera dil halka kardiya...pura hal to nahi dhoond paya magar jyada sukoon aur gyan mila di hain...pranaam 👏
The video is amazing sir.. and great life lessons.. my life is also a very similar ...I am 45 and divorced now.. and my parents are no more..my advise to younger people , please take care of your life as a first priority.. don't be too good and try to make every one happy.. people will use you as a colour pencil to make their life colourful.. you must find a good paying career , a loving wife, have children , house and have connection with God.. you will find people who emotionally make you feel guilty , be very careful.. people you trust and love most will betray you..
@upworkprofileevideonoorula
No loving wife in reality, girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status. Girls treat man ATM machine
I found it very much relatable with that of my father's life. He was the good boy of the family and our uncles are earning way less salary and respect than him. But he never got close with our grandmother but our uncles did and ultimately because of the tension in family he suffered from serious illness which ultimately took his life. You were on point sir.
God Bless his soul..May you be blessed with hapiness..health & prosperity
😢😢. Bhai rula diya tumne.
Mujhe lagta h mere father ki bhi same story h. But he is fit and fine❤
This is my father ... my mother was also working ... Both did their best to uplift their respective families ... But it ruined our life ... My sister n me r extremely bitter with both sides of families n don't want to get married ever ... Relatives r the biggest burden
Same here, my parents did well for me not for my cousins. If his parents are unable yo provide them the life I am getting I am the privileged one not him. And then once I deny being ATM I am the bad one. Then let me be bad one now.
high salary hogi to aadmi ki atma choosegi............sir you made me cry here.
That's reality
Is comment section m ek v ladki Nhi dekhige yhi problem h Jb EQUALITY ki bat ati h SALA EK LADKI KO UKRAINE NA CHODNE KA PAVANDI NHI LAGA HALA KI LADKE KM H LADKIO S ....
BEST H SHADI MY KRO.....
Iska mtlb kya he??
Matalab bhai aesa bhi hota Hain...kya😢
Kuch aur bhi choosegi😂
Just amazing... I'm an IIT grad, happened with me in my initial years of my career. After 4-5 years I set up strict boundaries with my parents
My arranged marriage was the same. I belong to Rich family but got married to the below poverty line family bcoz my husband is Good, Simple and earning well. After marriage they forced me to leave my job as there was no need for such. And once I left the job, I found he was in debt 5 times of his salary. He cannot say No to his parents kyunki bahut takleef dekhi h un logo ne.
I faced so many problems till I got another job. Still problems are there but at least I have some savings for my survival 😊
😢😢. If my husband in laws tell me to leave my job because only he is eaening wel, the first thing that I am going to leave is him😢
Son taking takleef because parents took takleef. In the end, good education did not rid them of takleef. Hope you have informed in laws about debt.
mam shayad aapko BPL matalb nhi pata , i think u want to say your husband is lower middle class
@saumyasrivastava
If you are belonging to rich family it doesn't mean your father property belongs to you. Go check 100 houses ask hey girl did your parents give property to you. Answer is no.
Then what is the point saying you are belonging to rich family.
In reality men getting injustice
Hindi me likh deti.
This has happened with my father....he has ruined our life in the process
whatever he said in the video is 100% true, one of my uncles is an aeronautical engineer he started earning at the age of 23 and got married at the age of 30 with my aunt, he has been earning for the last 7 years and had nothing in the name of savings, did not own a house, a car or any asset, his family especially his mother was milking his money and his other siblings were beneficiaries, his family told him that they do not have any money to spend on his wedding so he had to bear all the expenses, his family also took dowry but neither bride nor groom knows till date what happened to that cash. But after getting married to my aunt he was able to book a flat within 2 years of their marriage and they both were able to save enough money to go on 2-3 trips every year, they are now enjoying their life cuz my uncle could see what was right and what was wrong, very late but still understood. Boys never think that your parents can't take advantage of you.
I can relate to this sir. But the problem is its too late now. I was on a same guilt trip and wanted to become provider for my family whatever I could. Now I am 38 and yet single. My parents didn't approve my relationship with my GF. Now everyone is settled in their lives, and I am alone and depressed, cursing my life everyday.
And the fun part is my younger siblings don't care much and don't contribute much yet they are more close to my parents than me, because I could not deliver up to the expectations.
Expectations are endless. Stay away from them and start your life now. It is not too late. The more you are near them the more you will be living in guilt.
I find it weird when guys ask permission for a relationship.
Bhai jb aap khud khush rahoge tabhi dusro ko kudh kr paoge , start your journey if it's giving you joyful & happy life . wish you a very happy life ❤️ & god gave you strength to overcome your problems
Bhai m on same line now 35, single and not even considered important anymore
What happened to your girlfriend
My husband is going through this I feel bad try not to fight but when I see injustice towards us from family I try to stop him 😢I love him and want him to be proud always .
👏👏👏👏 Nobody talks about these topics the way you do! I went through this scenario for around 20 years, got depressed, had many sessions for 10 months or so with a psychologist to learn to say “STOP I CANT DO MORE, I HAVE A PERSONAL AND FAMILY LIFE ALSO “ things got improved gradually…
I am also suffering from same issue since last 5 year. Can you advice me?
ज़बरदस्त👍
मैं क्लास वन एक ऑफिसर हूँ और आपका एक एक शब्द एकदम सही है.
शुक्रिया.
Very True Sir.Sometimes I feel nikamma hona hi sabse acha hai.No Tension No responsibilities No expectations
True
Same thing for studious, obedient, working ladies. Arranged marriage is only option.
This video should be circulated to all Indian families. It's so important that lot of youngsters gets into the trap of Seva. The life becomes so miserable that so many losses the conference and dumped by their own family.
Yup, but after sharing with anyone, most people with narrow minded will make comments to me like I'm being brainwashed with this or I'm getting away from Indian tradition and been influenced by western one. It's too complex bro
@@ygp47 I don't understand after getting married what's the role of parents. They should be only be in advisory role. After having 2 children and 17 years of marriage my mother still made me emotionally black mail to leave everything and take care of her. I emotional fool did it and now regretting. The damage has happened and no way I can fixed it.
Bhai leave your toxic mother as soon as possible ....I did the same and now things are better for me ...
True .
I hv seen in practicality
@@rahuljagdale9113same
Your wisdom is earthy and definitely one of the best I have heard. Much, much better than the so-called, self-proclaimed influencers.
I am 22 hailing from a small town in Bihar currently pursuing mbbs and brought up in lower middle class family..i hope I get the courage to send this video to my mother..your videos are such an eye opener
Atleast mbbs kar raha hai bhai tu
Bhai, agar tereko lag raha hai ki Dr ban kar tu aish karega, bhul ja
@@mrppsr4731 MBBS is long enough to realise that
Never do this. This man is misleading youths. He will not tell the same to his own son and daughter
@@triptydatta7540 can you please give some points bhai?
Awesome video.
I wish this eye opener video released like 10 years ago. For all young lower middle class good boys/girls, which are moving to higher middle class, this is a treasure.
Not just good boys, even good girls nowadays fall into this trap. 😕. This is the story of my life.
I too agree, one of the two daughters , have been living under guilt for so many years to help them but it has been very painful
We all should understand parents r selfish. They don't care about future of their children. My sister is also falling in their trap n destroying her life.
My selfish cunning mom want me to work like serveht for her fav daughter she is brate now nothing no talent only fair and beautiful that everyone like. But i m dusky less beautiful but attractive highr iq level love studying highly ambitious and multi-talented. But got no support from faimly. She want me to be house wife stop being ambitious individuals and book warm . all those quality she want put in my young sister .i m happy and free from future responsibility i will never come home once i m succeed in life
@@shwetathakur4707 how can parents be so discriminating that too against their own child this is soooo sad and disheartening 😢
@@shwetathakur4707 please try to stay away and keep some distance with her and don't leave your goal otherwise you'll lost yourself in her hands.. I'm also seeing these types of situations..
Feeling lucky to be born in a good family. My father act harsh on me only to make me work more hard and become successful. He has already enough savings to live like king along with his govt. pension therefore he has no greed for money. Only thing he wants to see is me standing on my own feet.
❤❤❤❤
U always speack very practical truth which noboday dared to speak.
@speak
Yes I am a 35 year old female
I am a chartered accountant I started working for good salary from the age of 25
My mom postponed my marriage till I was 32 with greed to swindle my income along with my younger brother
While her son got married at 28 while he is 20% salary compared to me
It is absolutely true
God bless you. Sad to hear
Are to aap love marriage kar lena tha. Par arrange marriage me to aapka shoshan hi hota. Job k sath bohot aur torture bhi bardaasht karna padta maa to phir bhi achhi hoti hai aap kanhi ja k dekho working women ki halat bhi bohot kharab hoti hai sasuraal mai torture zyada hota hai sasural ma compared to mauka. Kuch 10 %ko achhe family mile hai baaki ro rahe hai sab
Sad to hear that madam. That our own parents treat us like sona ka anda denewali murgi. Start your journey now. Believe in God and in you only. All the best. You will do well
😢
Same my story
So relatable to my husband. My in laws did all things as you said. Dudh ka karz and all things set in my husband's mind. Even after doing so many things, these parents demanding to return son's degree. They threw us out of family. Never be too good to anyone.
सही कहा . जो अच्छा होगा उसका सब use करेँगे माँ बाप भाई बहन .
i agreed to your single word i am facing the same problem in my married life...i feel so so unsecured in my marriage....that make me feel very worried for my children's... .
I am from IIT and in the industry for 7 years. I can vouch that it's all true. Thanks to my father, he maintained a register. I used to hate him for that in the beginning but later that turned out to be a saviour from lot of disputes.
@@maverick7323 true true. I know lot of people who earn a ton and have done simple graduation.
@@maverick7323 *some non-iitians are earning more than some iitians
@@shrishri8898 bhai iit ka bhokaal bus indian companies tak limited hai....get your fact updated
@@shrishri8898 bhai life ka koi hard and fast rule nahi hota aaj kal degree ki value nahi hai skills ki job hai.Mere sath ke pade hue bilkul low grade college se aaj 20 lakh ke package par hai
@@shrishri8898 nhi bhai bas branch C.S lelo
Eye opening ! this kind of mirrors many living examples - simply great Sir
One thing i understood from this session is that never reveal your income , not even to your parents, if you're earning 30lakh pa tell them it's 20 and save the surplus.... As he said it all comes down to money, maintain a register for expenses of all sorts because only you are responsible for your future and happiness and no one else ....
especially not reveal to spouse, especially woman should take care of their finances, giving everything to husband landed my friend empty handed and divorced recently
@@bhadwamuhammad979 i love ur name lol 😜👌👍
I 100% agree on this. I've faced this in my life.
@@diauser3327 this is considered financial infidelity. The court can screw you real hard during the divorce.
@@aditya-ml6kmcan you name one thing the court will take side of male in case of marriage
101 % truth through which i have gone as a wife . Same happened. Now end he is 80 i sm 76 . AB PACHHATAYE HOT KYA JAB CHIDIYA CHUG GAYI KHET . BAS NAYE BACHHO YE PERFECT ADVICE HAI PL SUNO . SEVA JARUR KARO LEKIN KHUDAKO AAUR APANI JINDAGI BARBAD KARAKE NAHI . BE PRACTICAL AND LIVE HAPPILY FOR EVER .
This is so true. I have faced this in my family. Your own family will drain out your money and your energy. Be strict with your money.
Seedhi baat...no bakwaas.....that's Amit Sangwan Sir!!
Sir, you told my life's story. Really, eye opening. Thank you.
Same thing happened with my father who had started to earn at the age of 16 and made a house for the family . My other uncle's though haven't done much but they are taking equal shares in property and after doing so much he hasn't got anything other than criticism from all.
Bhai same mere dad ke saath hua hai my dad started and established gold silver jewellery business and he is gave many gold silver to my uncle and also gave to two elder brother of him and all three had never returned anything to my dad even uncle toh ghr ka kharcha bhi nhi uthate my dad had paid their kid's school fee upto 12th also and the properties my dad bought also my uncle's are demanding.. I'm seeing my dad's sacrifice for family and my both uncle are just enjoying life with my dad's Money
@@abhaysoni926 abhay same to same jaisa hai VAISE mere saath bhi ho raha hai 😢
@abhay @krish maf karna ek galti ho gyi thi. Vese can you elaborate, I can also give insta if you feel uncomfortable
Also, forgive for offense u both.
@millionaire bro then did you or your father tok cunsoltation or not? Exp and good Cunsoltants can change ur father life, do u know(sorry for that kind of english)
Actually. And the demands doesn't end when a sibling especially daughter gets married. When this daughter comes to Mayka for 15-20 days, the food, fun, travel, gifts for all the her family etc. expenses are more than monthly expenditure.. 😢 The good son and the obedient Bahu has to make extra budget for that..
These parents want to go on trips, relatives in foreign countries invite them out of respect. Now they want their son to do all the expenses... Because they are dependent..
The good boy son doesn't take foreign trips himself as he wants to save for his own old age.. 🤦🏼♀️😂
Amir bante hi sab se pahle gharwale hi dushman Ban jate hain...
well said
True 👍 आपने बिल्कुल भी extreem नहीं बताया है, ऐसा लगा कि मेरे husband की ही story है, और बिल्कुल उन्होंने जॉब लगने के 10 साल तक शादी नहीं की,but शादी के बाद मेरे साथ हुए behaviour से एहसास हुआ कि घर वाले शादी नहीं करना चाहते थे, और हमारी शादी को 14 साल हो गए हैं husbsnd को आज भी एहसास नहीं है, उनके भाई बहनों की लाइन ही इतनी लंबी है कि खत्म ही नहीं होती
Same story😢😢
Aap bahut valuable baten Bata rahe hain sir,
Koi aisi baten nahin batata
You are a big guide to us thanks a lot for doing this sir😊
Biggest irony is that in coperate 50 lpa package is 1 to 1.5 lakh in hand not 30 lakhs mnc package are calculated in so much vague that 4 year stocks are calculated in single year CTC and package is inflated
one year salary with stock is nearly 20 lakh
@@imsayan2802Bhai bangalore me 20 lakh ka bhi lawre lag geya hya 🙂🙂
Halat dekh le Bhai😑
@@SagarPramanik1 I don't get your point.
This has blown my mind. Every sentence makes sence and is so practical. Yup in today's world, there are most of videos of about how to get successful.... How get to that last ladder of success but when people reach their, they have all knowledge about Professional stuff but never thought of what will happen to his social life when he gets along with it.
Thanks!
I have experienced the same. But whenever I have tried to convey/explain the same as a son, I was always be seen as mean by others including the parents. Thanks for sharing the video.
Pranaam guruji...aapke jaisa koi nahi hoga...etna gaharaise aapne bata diya har ghar ka kalesh ka karan.
True insights 👌.
Some parents are pressurising their good boys even after more than 10 or 15 years of marriage of their sibling for monetary helping them. And they themselves are fully supporting their nikkama child by all power and will. What about the life of good boy?
The son should know to deal with it
Same happening with my husband.. 😑
Shame on you bro. Wo tera bhai ya teri behen hai. Tere jaise bewkoof ko samjhane ka man nhi tha lekin samjhana pada.
Being a Pakistani Chartered Accountant, i can imagine how true all the facts sir is quoting. everything is true 100%. meri shaadi 34 me ki parents me aor ab phadda hota hahaha paison ko ly kar...hahah
I have suffered s lot
My husband had been used as ATM
My in laws made my life Hell
Yes your content is very nice
Thanks Sir
@royshelly7982
Are you not husband as ATM?
Actual reality girls simply select boy based on salary, property, height, professional status.
@@raghunathreddybudda-hk1jc& girls are select on beauty ,stop crying & earn money.
How is it going now with your in-laws?
Spot on, wish I had seen this video 25 yrs back
Sir you helped a lot. You're consultation gives the most realistic image of Indian families and there Psychic.
This is the truth,
This is why I isolated myself from everyone (family, friends, etc.) once I became rich and started maintaining a low profile and pretend like I am just making enough money to make ends meet. No parents, no siblings, no relatives, no friends, no wife, no partners, no children. I am enjoying everything myself as I earned it all by myself! ;)
🤣🤣 sahi h yar!! Badhiya kiya..😃
@@tamannasingh5641 hii
Ah ...I wish I had such a beautiful life .
Shabash.....😂
I'm planning the same, don't want kids and wife, I'll just enjoy my life, travel, meet new people, try their culture, instead of being miserable with a boring sad life, investing all my money on kids.
Sangwanji should be a guest lecturer at various universities all over the country to impart these precious life lessons to students so that they can make this country and society a better place to live in
Companies also same.
Kam karne wale employee se 12 ghante kam karwaya jata hai aur Boss ke agae piche ghumne wale promotion lejate hai.
Well, this was extremely good explanation of a subtle but massive problem. Epic !
Your seedhi baat videos are fun to listen. With great messages. Thank you so much! 🙏👍 🎄
Uncle how can you be so right and to the point in all topics. I have seen my friend suffering as his wife who is also doctor and has no father, she is doing everything for her mother and siblings at the stake for her marriage. My friend doesn't ask her income but to start family as he is already 38 but she doesn't want to think of kids till she settles down her siblings and her family is emotionally controlling her.
Another patient of mine is working 15 hours after domestic violence in marriage and divorce. But even after working so hard for mother and brother they dont care.
So many times parents put emotions trap and the obedient kid suffers. Hopefully parents understand that kids are not their lottery.
😅😂 bahut khoob sir..❤. You understood and explained very well
ग्रेट इंसान हैं सर आप जो आप सामाजिक बाते फ्री में बोलते हैं ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Aapne bhot achha analysis kiya hai....each hidden aspect of Indian society is well explored by you.
Thankyou Sir. Spot on analysis. 100% accurate.
Hi sir ..u logics are life changing material. Pls make a vedio where mother in law has done a job through out her whole life but now bahu she wants job less just to take care of child , her family n relatives. This is my real life issue ..now m having two kids but doing nothing. If I want to raise my life again on track then she again n again interferes my decision n tells my husband very humbly that my husband always belive his mother not me. Wahi ghisa pita excuse ki bache kon dekhega ..n she's very smart enough to cover her evil feelings for me.
If you desire to do job, work on getting it otherwise your life will be hell in regret and frustration
,Even can give you mental issues in future
My sister had same situation but she resisted second child,and now his son is 10 and she has joined the job,it helps her socialise,and be happy otherwise life as housewife can be frustratingly boring for many
@@sudhirchandra9790shakuni karwa de divorce Iska 😁
Sir In your 3 rd Happiness course I during query time asked u one question. It is very similar to my situation. I am very relieved from this guilt trip now. I face emotional blackmail of my parents with logic and my comments are more articulate. I will watch it atleast 10 times more.
Your effort is very visionary.. its benefits can be seen in long term when sukoon and stability comes in life. Relations remain entact by following ur advice. Your video why beta bahu should not live with in laws was legendary in my opinion. I am thankful I found u before I turn age 30. My pressure of doing good in sarkari naukari is also relieved. Ckakki peasing aaraam sai aur aanch ko kam kar do has given ultimate sukoon to me.
Your advice is doing more good in society than all other reforms, as you are addressing issues which no one is discussing but where actually the root cause of problems lie. Regards
I hope..one my husband will watch all his videos n read ur comment also😊
@@SHIVANEEZWORLDwahh yee choriyaan bahut tez h
@@PankajKumar-eu7oy 🤪🤪
My bad
It's Once my husband 😝
What a wonderful guidance. This should be shown to all these good boys and their parents
Bahut badhiya clarity session sir, thank you!
Each and every word is true Sir. Indian parents make the good boys do everything for them monthly expenses,gifts,marriages, new home etc their siblings and then for their kids. This go on for 10 20 yrs. Few understand and few think that their wife is there enemy. They will not give anything to the wife for years but will expect her to do everything for his family. Her married life is sacrificed in between. Harsh truth of many.
Literally sir, you are great.. Itna dil dukha hai mera video dekh ke.. Bahot relatable hai..ma bap bahot use karte hai bachhe ko.. Mere husband ko dekh rahi hai.. Bura lagta hai
South Asian parents are almost alike. I am suffering from the same situation. All the burden of financial support to family is put on my shoulders as a punishment to my hard work. Even the education of siblings has to be bore by me. Thank you for your help ☺️🙏🏼 Love from Pakistan 🇵🇰
Amit Sangwan sir......practical n great social observer.
Exactly the story of my life … high earning of my husband is actually a curse … his parents are just after his money … hamare beech kabhi understanding unhone banne nahi di …. Most times I feel better hota ek normal earning wale se shaadi hoti … dono husband wife mil ke kamate aur achi life jeete
Kisi or ladke se pyar search krna dekho
Mam high earning means like 1lakhs + or more than , that as I earn 1 L I don't know that is it high or medium
@@Jaihindurashtra1igh earning has no limit. Jitna high utna hi kaam lagta hain. But for benchmark like I think, you can be having 1year or more emergency fund, not worrying about electricity bill and stuffs, can alot 5%-10% of your income to buy things for fun or out of need without worrying about savings, 20-40k phone looks very normal budget to you. And many more.
@@Jaihindurashtra12 lac + minimum.
@@Jaihindurashtra1salaried people consider middle class except group 1 officer.
As a first time would be mom, I always think, what is the the right way. Kaha galti hui hai? Kisse hui hai aur mai kaise us galti ko apne bacche ke saath hone se rok sakti hun. How can we break this cycle? Maine ye video dekhn start hi is intention se kiya ki I will learn how to not let being good a curse on my son (if I have a son). Very helpful.
I absolutely agree. Bacche hume kucch owe nahi karte. Mai Aaj keh rahi hun. Aaj se 30 saal baad bhi kahungi. We bring them into this world, we spend on their studies or give them the best we can for our own selfish reasons. That selfish reason can be love for our blood or our own desire to look good parents in the eyes of the society.
Koi bhi insaan kahi door kisi anjaan ke naam pe paisa bhej de, use padha likha de, aur fir ummid kare ki maine kiya toh mujhe milna chahiye, toh shayad fair hai. Aur tab nahi mil raha toh aapne invest karne se pehle offer documents thik se padhe nahi. Bacchon ko apne budhaape ki laathi banana chhorna parega. Nahi toh woh bas kaath ke hi ho ke reh jaayenge. Ye chaahte ho apne jigar ke tukde se toh fir karo. Lage raho.
Sir jee.....yeh mere Dad ke saath hua hai.......
Kudos to you for being source of knowledge
Thanks sir ji, each and every word is true.ur courageous sir. My son is studying iit patna, I understand what should not to do in future. Write book sir.
Really true...they suck too much in middle of your career or specially when you are trying side business...their demand is never fullfilled when you are in sortage of capital to setup business and you remain working for others whole life
You are absolutely right …. Did everything to keep the parents happy, send them enough or more, but last they showed their nature… ….
The title is just too accurate. I have never been a good boy and my father , mother family has been very happy with it.because things are very clear
Thank you Sir …. I have been on this guilt trip since my childhood
Your videos are very good
My husband and I suffering from the same problem as you told sir well done to 🙏🙏🙏
Each and every word is true, this is what most of the earning middle class family boys going through. Thanks for talking about it🙏🏽
Sirji,you understand the pulse of North India.
Sir ye sari baatein hum jaante the.. But the way you vocalized it was so accurate
And it's endless loop...
how do you touch the reality so closely. awesome sir, i am speechless.
I m the wife of this good boy. I left my job under inlaws pressure. My father in law wanted me to do well but all others were against.Sometimes fall in depression.
Though may sound a bit harsh to the majority but spot on sir!! The sooner both sides realize and take a practical view of things life would be better. Keep going with this lesser discussed topics. Best wishes.
Yeh bilkul meri kahani hain. Thank you, Amit Ji
Loved the topic sir ! Thouy i am not from a service class community, but can totally understand the complexity of this situation. As you always say - your topics are really interesting & true to life . They are preparing me for my future. Thank you so much.
Sir aapki baate bahut satik hai. Aisi situation mai dekh raha hu
U r my favourite youtuber sir.. being a jaat I can understand what u are trying to highlight.. it's really painful being a bahoo and beta in jaat families.. u r such a blessing.. I know abhi kuch humara to hona Jana nahi hai .. but yes change to aaiga..
Bahut badhiya topic hai, sir ......
Ek gyan yeh bhi De dein sabko ki package sabko batana obligation nahi hai. Initial bata bhi diya to aagei ke promotion etc par chup rehna seekhein. Parents or other relatives or friends don’t have to know ur package. Yeh india ki basic badatameez aadat hai to ask people’s packages. Yahan tak ki rah chalte driver, paanwale bhi pooch lete hain without a hitch . It’s an important confidential information. Please keep it to urself
Yes darling
Aurat ki umra or aadmi ki tanaqa kabhi ni puchna chayiye
गुरु जी एक बार फिर आप 100% सत्य है
nice video sir.... promoting more transparency in relations, and most importantly speak up everyone, keep your hearts out
namaste Sir....so connecting....U told complete truth. Got clarity! thanks
You are great sir..
I salute your experience and understanding