How I Learned to Meditate & Downsides of Living A More Examined Life | Matt Harris (Dan's brother)
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- Опубліковано 5 січ 2025
- How I learned to meditate? How do you fit meditation into a busy life? A candid interview with Dan Harris' younger brother, Matt...who used to mock Dan for his growing interested in meditation.
(Matt's Essay referenced is under WRITING at www.danharris....)
Matt Harris is partner at Bain Capital Ventures, where he’s developed an expertise in Fintech, or financial technology. He’s also a father of six incredible children. He is 17 months younger than Dan, to the day. And as you will hear, he likes to make fun of his neurotic brother. In fact, he shows up a lot in Dan's first book, 10% Happier, mocking Dan for his budding interest in meditation.
In this episode we talk about:
Practical tips from Joseph Goldstein
The books that have been integral to Matt's process
Tips on starting a practice.
The biggest issues for meditators
How not to try too hard
How awareness of the ego impacts work,
The upsides and downsides of living a more examined life.
Learn more about Ten Percent Happier podcast at www.tenpercent.....
Check out guided meditations alongside practical teachings in the Ten Percent Happier app. Click here [10percenthappi....] to get started.
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As always, thanks so much for the killer content! I remember when I started, I really got into craving - craving a particular experience. Today, as you say, it's about the discipline and the practice, not about attaining some 'mind-blowing experience, etc. Appreciate you!
We're so grateful to have you on board!
That was such a pleasure. Thank you both for this honest, open, thoughtful conversation. The humour and ordinariness that you brought to this insightful exploration of your journeys is much appreciated.
We're so glad!
What I love most about this conversation is your interaction with your brother.
Totally agree! It's so fun to watch!
I’ve had a Vipassana practice for roughly the same amount of time as Dan. I consider Joseph Goldstein my teacher though I only know him through his online UA-cam and podcast dharma talks and I think I’ve listened to almost all of them. I don’t consider my Practice as leading to Nirvana but as a tool which has taught me how to be a better person and gain insight into the true nature of reality in a personal sense the same way I study quantum mechanics to gain insight into the nature of material reality. I tell people that meditation is like basketball practice, you learn and hone your skills, but it’s not an end in itself. From my point of view in meditation we learn the practice of being mindful, I.e. watching what is going on in one’s mind, being aware of the thoughts, feelings and emotions that pass through your mind and which if you identify with them you run the danger of being unskillful which I define as hurting others or hurting myself or both. Anger as an example, arises not because we say to ourselves "oh I think I want to be angry for awhile" but arises the way thoughts do through some habit pattern of the mind of which we are unaware. And the problem with anger is that it either hurts someone else, hurts one’s self or both. So the practice of meditation is to develop the skills to be mindful of the minds patterns so throughout the day as much as possible when unskilful feelings like anger or greed or lust or jealousy, et cetera arise in the real world, the lived experience world, the daily world of our experience we recognise them as what they are, not something that we have to act on but something which has arisen. Focus on one’s breath and these feelings quickly dissipate as mysteriously as they arose. And as the Buddha taught we must first learn to recognise these unskilful thoughts, emotions, feelings and then we must learn how to stop them when they do arise and finally we must learn how to keep them from arising in the first place. For me that is hugely worthwhile and the motivation for me to keep my practice going. It has made me a better person. And it works. Thanks for a great UA-cam video.
Thank you for sharing your story!
What I love most about this podcast is your beautiful interaction with your brother.
again i've listened to you both so much respect kindness and humour ❤❤ a great conversation between you for all of those listening
This is on the Mt. Rushmore of best TPH episodes. Profoundly relatable and enjoyable conversation. Thanks as ever to those who made it possible.
Thank you for such generous feedback!
You guys are so great together! I love to see the love and admiration between you two.
We're so glad you enjoyed it!
I thorougly enjoyed that. Impressed by how far he has come in a year especially with a busy job and all those kids. Inspiring me to get back to the cushion.
Awesome!
Fascinating conversation, thank you! I'd like to voice a thought: Like many folks nowadays, I'm a total atheist who is building a serious interest in mindfulness meditation, as well generally in Buddhism-related topics and philosophy. However as a rational person and an atheist, I still find no reason at all to believe in a kind of "shared awareness with other sentient beings", that Matt seems to lean towards believing. Mindfulness can be a fascinating tool to learn about our own mind, improve our mental wellbeing, our ethical behavior - and I find we can also layer over it interesting philosophical ideas. However - none of this means we need to start believing in metaphysical things which we really have no serious evidence for. Such as - a "shared awareness". I understand the temptation to believe in that stuff - this is part of what has been fueling different religions for all of history. But I don't find it justifiable. Meditation - along with its various philosophical interpretations and related ideas - is fascinating enough. We don't need to actually believe in, well, actual "woo".
And to clarify - I'm not saying there isn't a "shared awareness". I'm saying there is no serious evidence for it. Just as there's no serious evidence for the gods of the different religions.
Interesting thoughts! Thanks so much for sharing!
What an absolute pleasure to eavesdrop on this warm, funny and insightful conversation between two brothers doing their work. Thank you Dan, you just keep getting better and better! ❤
I love hearing and watching you both! This was awesome. I’ve listened twice and watched the video as well! Do more together, please! You guys are great and I love your relationship!
Love this! Thanks for watching (twice over)!
Just found your channel this week . This talk sounds so much what I am going through. It is very supportive to find your brother describing his experiences. Sounds like group therapy back a few years ago when others described their experiences and I found support just by hearing their stories. Thank you
We're so grateful to have you join!
Such a wonderful conversation with huge sparks of humor and laughter thank you both ❤❤
We're so glad you enjoyed it!
you brothers communicate so well in this second careful listen i've been able to pick up useful details . thank you 🙏🏽
Thanks for joining!
An immediate favorite! I love your chemistry and humor and the really beautiful conversation. It helped me frame my own learnings in a new way. Thank you, Dan & Matt!
We're so glad!
Such a beautiful conversation! Both of you expressed your insights and experiences very clearly and authentically. Thank you for sharing
Also really happy for you two to be on the path together and undoubtedly growing even closer.
Yes!
I listened to this as a podcast. This was so informative but so fun too. Hopefully you’ll do this again.
Thank you! We'll share with the team!
For Matt and I think you Dan may also be also interested... from what I heard Matt sharing about, this is audio and I think there is a book, but the audio is in the author's voice... and he is a Jungian Analyst. You may have already got in touch with his work./ But just in case, here is the title. I love this as I was working through stuff and it gave me a very helpful perspective. I think Jung and Buddhism do harmonize: so here it is and the author is James Hollis: Through the Dark Wood: Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life Audible Audiobook - Original recording
James Hollis PhD (Author, Narrator), Sounds True (Publisher)
Thanks for sharing!
on Matt's notes about intrinsic curiosity I wonder what Robert Sapolsky would say about two brothers who come and go into meditaiton at different times and decisions about the life you want to live BEYOND THE SOFT VIOLENCE of SELF IMPROVEMENT that Vinny Ferraro talked about... enjoy the ordinary miracle you and your sibling can talk about the river of life together.
Yes!
Watching, I paused here to share this video with my sister, hoping that we might move closer and my adult children for a morsel of the education I would have given them, had I been able and with two new friends across the country I'd like to share as a welcome to my chaotic world party favor❤
I wasn't able to search successfully for the essay being discussed.
Here you go: (scroll down page) www.danharris.com/podcast
Thank you
Thank you!!!!!!!! 🌻
You are so welcome!
What I tefylky enjoy is the laughter as every time I laugh o recall everything’s said !!
Yes!
Great interview, so relatable. Thanks to you and Matt.
Our pleasure!
Heartening!
Thanks for watching!
Love this!! Thank you!!
Glad you liked it!!
Heartwarming in addition to typically informative.
I loved this so much. Thank you. ❤
You're so welcome!
I love this. I want to read Matt's essay. Where can I find it?
www.danharris.com/podcast and scroll down to Writing section!
@@TenPercentHappier thank you
A great communication and info ..
It is pretty hard to "not think". The practice is not engaging with the thoughts and just letting them float by like water in a river.
We appreciate your insight!
Is there a link to where I could read Matt’s essay?
Here you go (scroll down the page): www.danharris.com/podcast
Wood nymphs and fairies😂😂😂
Did anyone else notice that the two brothers share the same sense of style? Their grey sweaters are nearly the same.
Love this!
For me mindful training is one thing meditation another facet
Yes!
If it’feels trie’ I believe was what Nuddha suggested you Finns out for ur self of his teachings
Guitar strings tuned too tightly actually break! : )
Touche!
Life is the dancer. You are the dance! Eckhart Tolle 😏
Yes!
Is this your brother, Dan?? You two do NOT have the same voice!
It is his younger brother!
AI double...obviously
Freaky lol. He sounds very like you