3 Words You MUST NEVER Say to Your EX after NO CONTACT | Communicating with Your EX after a Breakup
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- Опубліковано 11 лип 2024
- 3 Words you MUST NEVER say to Your EX after NO CONTACT
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#breakups #nocontact #relationshipadvice #avoidantattachment
#1. Sign no contact is working for you: you lose interest.
Yes
Oh, the magic happens: you start to see everything clearly and, sign #2 NC is working for you is that you start to think WTF?!
I’m losing interest and I feel way better
Bro i woke up and im noticing the feelings are lost for this women like I really starting to not care and it feels good tbh
Yes 😂 🙌 let’s not mention he contacted me and I didn’t care 😅 I’m done lol
Just to give some of yall hope... I had an ex come back after like 2 years, with some crusty breadcrumbs 😮💨... saying I'm their soulmate blah blah blah. All the words I had PRAYED and CRIED and BEGGED to hear... but by then, not only had I moved tf on and was happy I did, but they had a new person as well (who I felt bad for... if only they knew 🙄). I still remember the pain I felt... to this day I remember it, but more like an "observer" and not from that place I was in at the time.
The pain is real... but so is the healing 🤗 #stayfocused #stayblessed #lovejonezin
This person block u on everything
@@Ericgodisgood I wasn't blocked. Just ignored heavy. Then once I stopped trying, they came back apologizing.
@@Jonesybabie yeah man she moved on in I mess up I’m blocked on everything she wants nothing to do with me
@@Ericgodisgoodsame here. I'm blocked from Facebook, messenger and he even changed his phone number. Since March. I even broke NC twice, been around the block. I'm in 52 days NC now. I did not know he was a DA. Until I saw these kinds of videos when I was at my lowest low. And it helped me a lot. I'm in a better place right now compared three months ago. I even made 15 pages of letters for him. Good thing I did not send it to him.
Update: A 4yr ghost popped up this summer with an excuse... and I was like "whate made you call me, of all people?" 🤨 He said he been wanted to reach out... then he proceeded to overshare another excuse but declare he wanted to see me (he was magically in town)
I was too busy living my best life in another country 😝 And wouldn't have made time even if I wasn't 😌🤣 Moral of the story... leave ghosts in the graveyard 🙃
Guy's the whole math behind no contact is to get ready for yourself incase they don't come back you not actually even have to count days counting means you not focusing on yourself and rather waiting...
They don’t come back
"Can we talk?" Wish i had known not to ask this hours ago!
This must be for single folks who haven't had any children. No contact is almost impossible with children in the picture.
You got to have a No Contact Attitude. Even better, they get to see you doing great and looking fine without you wanting to see them, you're just dropping off the kids. Been there done that
Why would you want someone back who at any point thought you weren’t good enough for them
Because ppl can change.
At some point did you ever think they weren’t good enough for you? Some people are worth it no matter what the comments say
I chased my ex for two months before finding these videos. I implemented no contact after her blocking me. I changed my number etc and have been working on my self. It's rough. I'm changing career etc. After a 6 weeks of me implementing no contact. I did reach out to her. I sent a simple and polite text regarding my stuff. She replied instantly. She then engaged in a joke back and forth. And acknowledged that I had applied for a job in new career. That's where it stops for now but I wanted to let everyone know that there is hope.
It's been 2 months since you're comment. What's new? Are you guys courting each other? Moved on?
@@Darkchylde50I did the exact same thing but it didn’t work out in my case… but this time I realize that she’s no good for me and I deserve way better
Wow your story is just like Milne right now
We are still in no contact, but her sister reached out to me the other day... also way to many coincidental meetings. I haven't moved on. I am well and happy but still miss her terribly. She is on her way back to me. We needed this time apart for sure. I believe there is still another chapter in our story. But in the meantime I am growing and being awesome.
@@robinholt4288 *"After a 6 weeks of me implementing no contact. I did reach out to her."* You didn't follow NC...you're playing yourself. If she dumped you, she needs to win you back. In the meanwhile, you're improving yourself and dating other women...If she reaches out or not, it doesn't matter because you've worked on yourself enough to be fine either way...If you dumped her, only then do you reach out and apologize.
Thank you, so much for posting these videos! 🙏 ❤️
Thanks for the video, thumbs up! Secured which I already knew :)
very good...really good stuff. I needed this. My x reached out recently ...kind of...and it caught me flat footed. She has not tried again lately but I need to be prepared for the next time. Good stuff.
Just discovered you and you present good feedback! Preciate the new perspective. Thanks!
Keep up the good work coach🎉
Good Morning Coach.. Great Advice As Always!!!! Thank You ❤💙💚
Coach Black. I’m just saying you are so dope dude. And everything you say is so spot on. Thanks for sharing the knowledge king 😭🥰
I am so happy that I found your videos. I'm presently going through a tough situation right now.....this really helps.
I Booked a session with coach Blac . I can tell everyone that it was worth it. I did not feel rushed and gave me advice that has carried me thru. Thank you coach!!!!
Part of me feels as though you're still dealing with the residual pain and heartache with your previous lover(s). It's okay to use this channel as much self therapy as It is a forum/lecture of information , insight and education. We appreciate your traumas and we empathize/love you, breh.
Never make yourself high value, just be you and attract someone for you.
Ok bum
I wish to God i watched this video and knew about this way before I did all that BS you just said, lesson learned now am way more relaxed
Can I just say you healed me during these times
I don’t know how but I saw your videos out of nowhere when I was at my lowest, it’s still been rough but when I start to feel low I watch your videos especially when it come to working on your self, you are seriously saving my life man.
Facts. These vids really were recommended at the perfect time for me. Praying for your speedy recovery señor Hispanic 🙏🏾 There is always hope 🤎
Honestly
Jesus saves lifes
I hope you feel better soon man, keep going
You're on the right track Joneybarbie it gets easier over time, I hope that the last few months have been progressing for you in the right direction.
I agree totally . If you think your going to hear something substantial via text or phone after a long gap think again. No one is going to put themselves out there like that. As coach says you have to wait for the buildup.
How long do we have to wait 3 weeks already seems too long
I came here just right in time, and I always love your videos
Your focus is never to be solving the relationship issues, but to be creating new, fun memories, enjoying the moment.
Exactly well said.
Thank you for your wisdom! 🙏🏾 When my special person reaches out, I will be sure to apply this valuable knowledge!😊
update?
Cheers mate.
❤❤❤ thank you 😊
Thank you for this video. So good and thorough. I love how you acknowledge respects for both parties. A breath of fresh air. Man you are so good. Reinventing things for everyone that only sees womens as the top prize. Seeing if the job is good enough for you is just as important as your seeking a job.
Reevaluate your habitual thinking that doesn't serve you and you can have it all
I need to hear this thank you
Nah , I'm done with his games . I'm moving on . I'm starting to date again . I'm tired of waiting around ...
Good Shit!!!!
It works!
Thank you 😊
I can’t wait to respond with “ Who’s this?
I did text him after 9 months , and his response was positive . We both kind of rejected eachother !
🙏 thank you
If you need breakup advice, listen to this guy.
For guys out there, women’s feelings change like the friggin’ wind. They are nuts. Don’t EVER chase a woman. If you aren’t good enough for her, Vaffanculo. There are a million other fish in the sea.
Straight up
Awful advice. Do chase women, in general. Those millions of other fish in the sea will just be the hundred scraps left if you don’t chase them, because women with value need effort to get.
But don’t chase someone after you broke up. Because you should just move on, or otherwise give the impression you have.
My ex opened up to me after no contact and told me that she missed me and literally spelled her guts out. Also opened up to her about how I felt and what I went through during no contact by telling her I’ve also missed her company and what we both fvcked up on. Any advice on what I should’ve and shouldn’t have said/done in the conversation? Just thought honesty and reciprocating her intentions was the best way to bring hate out of my heart and get her to come close to me. We held hands as we were discussing memories and our flaws.
Thx I need this she asked 4 weeks ago for a break …. We had a relationship of 6 years… last 2 years it went down… basically because of my lazy behavior examples are not working on my self esteem not focusing on having goals in life beside my 9-5 job sitting on the sofa … complaining about little things in life … not cherish the day you wake up etc … she could not take it anymore… while she was and is the opposite… works from 9-5 having her side hustle going to dance classes etc … she lost attraction she said … it’s hard and I’m bettering my self with these flaws … but she can not tell me how long this break will take from her part … so I’m doubting if she will come back …. Especially because she says that she doesn’t know how long she needs
Any updates after 1 year?
My husband left me for someone else, doesn't reach out to me at all, and it's been 8 months. I think it's safe to say my marriage is over. Although I wasn't aware that I was making major mistakes in attempting to communicate when I should have been in no contact, I haven't been in contact for almost 4 months.
Was the marriage a happy one
You’ll be fine. Breaking no contact isn’t everything. Remember no contact is for you to heal. If it’s just to get him back your doing it wrong. If this man could leave while married he’ll do it again. You deserve way better. He’ll always play games doesn’t matter with who
Keep going. Those 4 months are now 6. They will eventually be 12 months and 18 months. Men usually can’t stand the silence, so whatever the reason is, he will reach out at some point. Don’t give in first
Girl if you no longer want him back you better file for divorce first before he does make sure you collect proof that he is with another woman so you can have a better settlement
@@ScissorNhe did this to me before we ever signed anything, he cheated for sure but put the blame on me, I can not do anything about it since we technically were not married this is the second time this happened
I went out with an narcissist he didn't like me working or doing things for me
😢so weak😢😢😢and I’m trying ok today is the RESTART of no contact 😢it’s been a year since beakup and 8 months since he has talked to me at all 😢I have messaged and acted rediculious 😢 honestly I’m ready to move on and I feel like he was never interested 😢
me and my girlfriend broke up after two years. I really messed up and recently a week ago after two months of break up we started talking again. Things sometimes go well but then we bring up something about our relationship and she feels like she can’t be with me. She’s scared i didn’t change and that our relationship will get in her way. She also says she doesn’t love herself so she can’t love me as much as she can. I just want to mend things but what can i do.
What background music is this! Omg!
Thx for another awesome video man!
any ideas on how to handle breaking up having kids ?
she rebounded after 9 years. she acted cold and rude at first.
now she keeps me updated when she has the kids and how much fun they have..
i'm working on myself, but it's still hard. (she left me for this guy 7 months ago)
What’s your update mate? I’m going through the same thing. She’s moving so fast and it’s just a matter of time before she want him to meet our boy! Thing is tho this bloke is a ex crackhead and absolutely nothing going for him apart from is snake mouth!
@@remyd1984 she's still with this new guy, but she still calls me for silly reasons and even asked if i wanted to come to the park with her and hang out with our kids (wich i did not do). She's very friendly and maybe she regrets it or feels guilt. I don't even bother anymore.. time heals wounds, and i'm moving on. Doing fitness, picked up kickboxing again, and it really motivates me to see results and just feeling more confident about myself. Yesterday my ex saw this new girl i was dating when i came up to pickup the kids. My ex looked over to the car every now and then to check out this new girl i was with while she was talking to me. Same story when i brought the kids back. I parked a little further away so they didn't need to see eachother, but still my ex had an excuse to talk to me over by the car and again kept checking out the girl i was with that was sitting in the car. She was feeling it man, you can tell after being with somebody for 9years. The thing is, nobody can replace YOU. This new guy has his negative sides that she will discover and realise that the grass isn't greener. Take this time to convert your sadness into something positive. Take the energy and improve yourself. Get fit, improve your clothing style, make sure you always smell fresh, look fresh and people will notice you're not letting this breakup get to you. This guy is not better than you, he is just new. Having something new will become normal. She will do the same thing to this dude. By the time she misses you, your mind and body moved to the next level. Stay strong and don't take her back.
@@BastanTheMan Well said keep going!! Kids or not life goes on be the best you!
Damn I hate these situations…. Girls like this will usually will leave again or cheat again when their emotions are gone if you slip up somehow. It’s kind of a bummer because you really wish it could work but than she just ends up breaking your heart. That’s my situation anyways… I did love this girl but I know her emotions are everywhere. Now I just kinda miss her. I can feel my interest fading
@@BastanTheManhappy for you bro
How does it work if it’s a long distance relationship? Face to face is kinda tough
Focus on self, it’s obvious that they’re an ex for a reason
How can I distinguish if they only want friendship or more without actually having to ask? What behaviours shall I look out for?
Can you make videos about ghosting? And how to move on?
Ghosting is rough and brings up lots of abandonment issues. Speaks volumes.. ghost back! Boo 👻
I can't believe this is common... where tf did all these avoidants come from!? I just had my first and hopefully my only experience with one
Too bad I've seen this video after doing this mistake. It's been 8 month and frankly i don't see how anything could suddenly change.
Its hard to not do no contract because we have a 7month old together but only time i call him unless the baby need things or watch her i have things to take care of
My ex reached out after about 3 weeks of NC. I never expected her too, I truly believed we were finished. However, I hadn't seen this advice, so ran straight back, told her how much I'd missed her, how I love her. I started trying to fix old issues, basically too much too soon. After 3 weeks back together, and only seeing each other for two weekends, both of which were happy, fun and really nice, she just got weird, and told me she didnt know why, but she doesn't feel the same. I'm heartbroken, so so sad. NC does work, but not sure on the 3rd time of splitting 😢
omg wer the same. she just told me that we need to focus ourselves for growth but she already had a bf. but now im in day 3 of nc. theirs a part of me that im still hoping that she'll reach out bcs she always do contact me when i don't chase her anymore but know i think it's different maybe she really moving on to someone else. i always encourage myself to focus on NC and work myself for growth.
I'm realising it's all one big game. Since I commented, she's reached out casually, I've kept it cool, and she's now almost needy, told me she's wondering if I'm okay, said how she's gone to call but then thought she shouldn't etc. I just said I'm doing okay, call me if you want, or dont, I'm easy! She then went on saying how I've clearly not thought about messaging her etc. Then yesterday she sent my daughter and I Xmas gifts! I don't feel it's right to accept them, so I'm sending them back, I feel its just her easing her own guilt at breaking up! Last night she then called, but I was out, and she messaged, saying how she might have to go into hospital and I'm down as her next of kin! Wow, It's like constant mind games. I've just told her that her that ad she's still married her husband will be her NOK, not me, or her parents or kids! Perhaps in this case it's est I just move on 😮
@@mrf4308please don’t sent those gifts back. That will be very hurtful to her. Trust me.
@@mrf4308She sounds like an avoidant. Unless she gets therapy, she will repeat the cycle. Protect your energy.
Wait...what if they are just teating to see if they still have access to you? If they are interested they wilk reach out again and their anxiety will increase
But I don't want to give him that spaces coz whenever I remember what he did I do cry
What about if my ex is calling me a lot,but has someone?
God bless usa, God bless nigeria.
Im just doing no contact to heal and move on from him being a jerk and breaking my heart 😂 i hate that he messages me randomly on my bday or the holidays when hes the one that fucked up.
He didn’t really ask to see me but we are LDR and he suggested that we figure out a date that works best to meet. I told him to let me know but he hasn’t and that was about 3-4 weeks ago. I messed up a couple weeks ago I guess by asking could we talk on the phone 🤦🏾♀️
Why don't you suggest a date to meet since he asked about that. . . then he should reply. All the best
You should teach man how to move on from an ex instead of going back that’s not healthy. Great content tho keep up the good work!!
my experience is weird ....i am a female and i am the dumpee...im watching how to get my ex back.. but weird he is the dumper following these step u mention
Great advice, my ex girlfriend was initially my friend for 12 years before we were together for 3 years, then i slowly got put back into friend zone. She now lives far away but still texts me everyday but believe she started talking to somebody else. Ive started taking a day or two to respond to her. Its very difficult to just be her friend
How can u be friend with your ex? I mean is it really possible?
@blacademic what if you are long-distance and can't meet face to face? Are voice or video calls a good alternative?
I’m previous videos, he had said Facetime is the equivalent
It's a game of tennis, you put the ball back into their court and you leave it there until they come back again.
How to set up a date when we live in different states now?
What if they are not sure or needs more time . Would more time feels better?
Mine teach out and say I am going to surprise you and come see you.Then a I miss you and still need you .Then I still love you .. now what ?
He has started talking to me on snapchat and watsapp after a year ..now we are in 2 countries not sure why ...he did say i was important and did ask me wat i feel ...as of now just kept it unknown as he has PG exams did want to cause a reaction , Please advice
So my ex wanted to be friends I told him know. We went out a few times after break up I thought we was working on things. for me to learn he's talking to other women so I went no contact after that and when I give keys back he asked could we have sex with no strings attached I said no and it been 2 months no contact but it's like he's going on with his life not sure if I should even believe he will come back.. he's in my thoughts all the time truly gave him the best of me.
It may work for some bt not all
But you dont interact with your followers, by maybe commenting a comment that interest you or liking it. That would help your channel also. And encourage followers to comment
I guess, I messed up. My last interaction with my ex, I made things awkward and now I don't think they will reach out until I reach out.
That’s the worst… I feel I did the same but they seem to lose interest anyways… no contact is the only way to do it. More healing for yourself and better results in the end
He started reaching out again, but it seemed more like testing the waters. I just asked him for no contact again. Idk if it was the right thing to do tho.
It's 2 weeks but he didn't actually break up with me. He let me go on vacation alone as we had an argument before hand. I haven't heard from him since only a random text about sending me money he owed me. I am in no contact and staying strong. He is expecting me to chase. It's hard
Stay strong.
Women are naturally supposed to chase, he probably thinks you don't care and likely that you played away, whilst you were, well, away.
He sent you that money and made a point of letting you know, despite knowing your bank will have let you know.
He isn't going to chase, he's given you the opportunity to show him that you care by chasing him, which is THE NATURAL ORDER.
Men only understand primitive and natural behaviors, and he's giving you the chance to be his woman.
But money is investment, and he's sent your investment into him, back to you.
I'd recommend cutting off the no contact and just being honest about how you feel, and try to understand the relationship from HIS perspective as well as your own, by asking him what his thoughts are on the situation.
However, I would say that based on the stage of his tantrum, and how long the issue has been ongoing, he's probably well on his way to creating a big, thick stone wall around the image he has of you in his mind.
@@discipleofhermes563 LOL what a bunch of nonsense
Man's has paid his debt and released you back to the streets😅😂
@@tukshaare4575😅😅😅😅mine blocked me 5days ago..cause he stated I made him feel like a kid anytime I helped him out..I meant no harm actually..I also blocked him yesterday 😂
Does viewing their stories on Social Media mean I'm breaking No Contact?😟😟
I don't think I can actually build it
Mine sent me a photo and unblock me. So I texted him and ask why he sent me this. He went on a rampant and telling me abt the women he’s seeing and we had a huge argument. He still texting.
I ❤ you brother ( not drunk rn)
Hi, plz help, if you initiated no contact with your long distance relationship, because He decline your phone call several times and acting nothing happen , so now you trying tovrebiilt your confidence , after fews weeks. Esch week He call and said, Hi sweety and so on...
And you never reply, dhould you wait until He apolodize on a text, or should you answer simply by replying. Hi, plz help
She finally picked up after 4months of no contact.. noting much was said.. she said she’ll talk to me later.. I don’t know what to say if we do
Ex contacted after a day of no contact HAHAHAHAHAH still haven't replied tho
Hey , Please elaborate in My case .
My EX broke up with me since January it's been 5 months , But she is still in contact with me , but due to my anxiety and addiction towards her I forced her to stay with me but in that way I pushed her much farther .
But she is still in my contact and I tried blocking her but she wants to stay in contact with me .
But she doesn't text me or call me or doing nothing but wants to stay in contact .
Is there any possibility that I can get her back ?
I am following your No contact rules strictly since 2 weeks.
This sounds unhealthy....work on being ok with or without her...love yourself.....don't be so needy...focus on your self confidence. It's attractive.
Don't lose yourself for someone else.....
Its been 40 days of no contact and he didn’t reach out. Gradually i am loosing hope😢
40days mine reached out after 4months lol you have to give it time and please don’t reach out to them let them reach out to you
They still might. But if they don’t, that’s the answer, they aren’t the right fit for you. The bare minimum for someone to be the right person is that they want to be with you.
Mine is 150 days still she doesn't have contact ❤or msg I'm in no contact situation. Last 5 months
Tomorrow will be 3 months for me. But it's ok 💛
Its been over a year for me.I still have hope....Hang in there tiger.
Tevin Campbell was sooo damn wrong 😅
Only real ones would get the reference...
🎶
I have been doing no Contact for almost 30day,I broke up with my ex a month ago yes I did the begging at first after I watched your videos I went no contact for 30days I noticed that my ex started stalking all my social media platforms and I never did anything now she has finally reached out and she said she "iam really sorry to say this but I miss you " I told her find time to see me did I do the right thing ?
Yes you did the right thing. You set a boundary which they need to respect. It’s up to them now to make an effort and communicate with you properly. If they can’t do that then they are just taking advantage of you and your kindness. It seems like she’s just playing a game and isn’t fully ready to commit to you. In that case, it is not up to you to change her. She has to want it herself and then you guys can move forward.
Got it
Does this work on women too?
What if you long distance?
I thought it was I love you lol
It's really hard to have no contact when he's a colleague 😂🤦♀️ I know, I know, they say that you should never "screw with the crew" ... but you cannot help who you fall for!
What's worse for me though, is that he's been trying to act like things are normal and that we're platonic again 😢😅
Me too. I see him every day but I don’t speak to him at all. It’s really hard
Same, it was hard at first but it’s better now
I love my ex I broke up with her she never gave me a chance to talk to her. Even though she loved me so much I tried talking to her back she keeps blocking me everywhere I haven’t texted her since one year.
i feel for you @ danis8406. I am currently going thru the same thing. Coach Blac has helped me tremendously though
In my case she went back to her X and she was just killing time with me for 4.5 months. But she never told me that. I figured it out. Not a word in 4.5 weeks. She has the distraction of the X who she is back with.
Walk away son
@@OGTrollTroll8 Run 🏃
Search for Rebound relationships on UA-cam. That's probably what she did to you.
Dodge the bullet brother
There are a lot more words than 3.
i am in nocontact but i uplode whatsapp status for her....should i stop?
don't answer phone calls leave it on deliver simple give them few weeks see if he/she call back if not bye bye thats the trick u test them since they want to test u not contacting you
What if it was a LDR? How do you apply this then if you cannot physically meet soon?
I have the exact same question. Was in a LDR for 3 years and we just broke up a week ago. Had some drama go down and she ended up blocking me on discord, but not fb for some reason. Gonna leave her alone and accept that its' over and that she's not coming back, but I'd still like a coaching session to help me get through this
what do you do if you made the mistake of bringing up a serious issue and then he says ive become so serious and he cancelled our meet up
Move around or stop being a nagging by$&h! No offense but a lot of women nag and aren’t aware of how irritating it is!
My no contact is blocking
take your time responding to them also. if they picked to leave your life they are no longer priority. my ex gf would txt me i wouldn’t respond till days later lol she caught the hint eventually.
That's the mistake, responding,cut them off right away. Open door, rite of passage, not really. Out of lunch.
@@adaptercrash Only if you don't want them back.
@@adaptercrash ngl i initially wanted her back but over time realized i did not. that’s when i stopped talk to her fr
@@elscrilla post structural idealism of the experience that defies any development of a reiteration? That's how to think about it? When it comes out, They wouldn't leave it unless there's something the matter with them, its affecting character, and it'll be triggered by them with the audacity to release the tension on to you. That means they were selling your talents within a relationship short, making your life difficult. You don't need that in your life but your being hospitable, in a sense they are taking you hostage. If it's a whole new experience for you, it can be a challenge you never wanted anyway.
@@adaptercrash What the actual fyck did you just type son? You are over complicating this thing. And the over complicating is what landed you here.. It’s simple she is either interested or not. If not you don’t placate her, you simply move on to greener pastures! And then when she tries to come back you should be(if you don’t it right) already talking to better options.. and no need to take her back!
Yeah, but my situation ended badly
Mine too i fucked up again
OK bro I've got one for you madly in love with my ex girlfriend. She has a daughter biologically not mine but has been in my life since she was 6 months old has called me daddy since day one I failed to be. A equal partner in the relationship I played a little bit of childish games here and there but basically failed to move forward in the relationship. The girl is half my age and has left me. I am working my best efforts to get myself back together to represent myself to her but our break up was so nasty. She filed a t p l what's your advice on this situation
And if you really do read these and read these comments. I am desperate and depressed over this. I am seeking therapy I am on medication. I am doing everything I can to hold it together until I figure out how and what to do
And even with age difference there are tons of shared interests activities that are enjoyed together. This is a tough one bro I'm madly in love with this girl. I want? To. Marry? Her I wanna have a kid with her of my own. There's obviously lots of more.
I tried and he always ignored my feelings