Yup, connected with a guy on all levels except the future outlook. We talked about that on date 5. I asked if he wanted kids and his quick answer was “No!” I said “ok thanks for your honesty and I respect your choice.” He said “Well I think it’s too soon.” I said “But down the line do you see yourself having kids?” He said “No! Why do you ?” I replied “yes!” After that our conversation just fell off. He said “Well maybe I’ll change my mind.” I replied “ I’m not in the business of making someone change. Kids are a non-negotiable for me. Because once I have a kid with a guy and he changes his mind and says “maybe I don’t want a kid anymore” I can’t really undo that.” Suffice it to say it gave him a lot to think over. And for the 1st time standing in my own essence and communicating it really made me feel good about myself.
After a six month connection and really expressing my needs- he then ended things yesterday stating he couldn’t give me what I deserve. I thank him! 6 months too long ♥️ follow your intuition ladies xxx
@@BernMendez thank you- it was a little hard to discern, intuition verses past trauma. My anxiety felt high- I initially thought it was because of me. Turned out his heart wasn’t yet open to receive me x
I have a probably unpopular view. I was married for 25 years to a kind, steady, smart, and quite emotionally steady man. I was not attracted to him at first. It took me a long time to become attracted to him. We had a wonderful marriage. And yes, most people might have said he was boring. But I loved it and ended up very attracted to him. I lost him 2 years ago. I hope maybe for another “boring” man someday:).
He's right about being hooked because of emotions! Sometimes you have to remove the Emotion to see the Truth of the Relationship! Once the Truth is Acknowledged and Excepted... Walked away with Grace & Peace🙃❤️
One of the things I have had to learn is to be a better person so that I can attract and keep who I want in my life and I feel I am ready at this point. It has taken me ten years to grow up and I made a lot of mistakes and good choices too and I feel at peace. Thanks so much for your content as you explain it clearly and provide wonderful tools.
It’s really unfortunate. I very rarely meet a guy I have strong chemistry with and then get breadcrumbed and no commitment or I meet a guy who is consistent and committed with zero chemistry?! 😢
Story of my life, I'm not short of interest but the only ones I want don't want me, or don't behave properly for a relationship to develop, it's so frustrating. I might have to settle for a guy with no chemistry.
Hi Bern, great video. I would love a video expanding on vetting a guy (with questions etc) on the dating app before going on a 1st date. Sometimes I do ask what they are hoping to find through the app, but that's a loaded question that can come off a little too strong if not worded properly. what do you think?
There are things for that I see in their profile. What do you see in their profile that you would automatically nix them? Mine is when they say drama, crazy and does not want it to be an interview, they have never married or been in a relationship longer than ten years.
If your question scares them off before meeting, they are not looking for something serious and you'll be wasting your time. What they say in their profile is also key like "I just want something casual, easy going, no drama, just want to have fun etc"
I called a man out who contacted me two years after ghosting me. I am tired of being "nice". I will not go out on a date until the actions are shown right out of the gate.
Amen honey , damn right my thoughts and heart exactly , put into words neither will i they aggravation and heartbreak they cause with their head games, is not worth it to me, as i need peace in my life as id rather be alone , just me and my little daughter.God bless you always .🌹💖💖🎉
I did that to a man after he ghosted me. Literally yelled at him over text. He apologized and said he isn't ready for a relationship. Men NEED to be called out on bad behavior. Read the book Why Men Love Bitches.
Hi. Appreciate your views on relationships. However, I've heard and read somewhere that the feeling of butterflies in the stomach is more so a warning that something is off. I'd look more into the meaning of what this means from a more spiritual perspective from a psychological view too.
Butterflies in your stomach can mean many different things sometimes it's because something is off but many times it's excitement and a sense of adventure.
Fill our own cup and give only and ever from our cup's overflow. Invest then test to meet and match levels of reciprocity. Ask good questions and test with a small "no" from the get go. Have an exit plan and know to GOSO when you spot 🚩 🚩 Know yourself, your standards, values and non-negotiables and be able to express yourself in empathetic yet boundarised ways that clearly informs them of our needs and how to treat us, thanks Bern. 👌👁️✍️💝⛲ 💝👍
Last relationship was 8 months ago. Guy from the past has been passive, breadcrumbing and boring. I’ve been going on dates as practice to get used to going on dates again. Rotational dating beginning.
Yes , sure, ask the right questions, but more times than not you'll get told what they think you want to hear, all lies. Nothing you can do about that.
The words someone shares with you are only part of the story, how they share the words and most importantly the specific, measurable actions that flow after said words, matter too. You can't prevent men from lying to you but you can certainly learn to vet men better so that you can identify the lies sooner rather than later. Hope this helps.
Love Your Channel and Content! Just came across Your Channel, I've hit the Subscribe button 😁. The Simplicity of Your content and how You deliver it 🥰 definitely exactly what I need for my current & future season (to take me from a 9 to a 10😌). Thank you 🙏🏼💌 "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." __ Proverbs 27:17
Yup, connected with a guy on all levels except the future outlook. We talked about that on date 5. I asked if he wanted kids and his quick answer was “No!” I said “ok thanks for your honesty and I respect your choice.” He said “Well I think it’s too soon.” I said “But down the line do you see yourself having kids?” He said “No! Why do you ?” I replied “yes!” After that our conversation just fell off. He said “Well maybe I’ll change my mind.” I replied “ I’m not in the business of making someone change. Kids are a non-negotiable for me. Because once I have a kid with a guy and he changes his mind and says “maybe I don’t want a kid anymore” I can’t really undo that.” Suffice it to say it gave him a lot to think over. And for the 1st time standing in my own essence and communicating it really made me feel good about myself.
I'm proud of you, Zari.
After a six month connection and really expressing my needs- he then ended things yesterday stating he couldn’t give me what I deserve. I thank him! 6 months too long ♥️ follow your intuition ladies xxx
Proud of you for expressing your needs, next time ensure to be even clearer from the start so you can gauge compatibility soon : )
@@BernMendez thank you- it was a little hard to discern, intuition verses past trauma. My anxiety felt high- I initially thought it was because of me. Turned out his heart wasn’t yet open to receive me x
I have a probably unpopular view. I was married for 25 years to a kind, steady, smart, and quite emotionally steady man. I was not attracted to him at first. It took me a long time to become attracted to him. We had a wonderful marriage. And yes, most people might have said he was boring. But I loved it and ended up very attracted to him. I lost him 2 years ago. I hope maybe for another “boring” man someday:).
I'm so sorry to hear this, Denise. Thank you for watching and please know there is hope. 🙏
He's right about being hooked because of emotions! Sometimes you have to remove the Emotion to see the Truth of the Relationship! Once the Truth is Acknowledged and Excepted... Walked away with Grace & Peace🙃❤️
An inconsistent Man is Unattractive! That's how a Man loses 🤷🏾♀️
I agree.
One of the things I have had to learn is to be a better person so that I can attract and keep who I want in my life and I feel I am ready at this point. It has taken me ten years to grow up and I made a lot of mistakes and good choices too and I feel at peace. Thanks so much for your content as you explain it clearly and provide wonderful tools.
Glad this was useful, Cavelle. : )
@@BernMendezHey bro this is Daniel from team JUSTIN MARC , we've been following your content
JUSTIN love to collaborate with you
Hope you reply asap !
It’s really unfortunate. I very rarely meet a guy I have strong chemistry with and then get breadcrumbed and no commitment or I meet a guy who is consistent and committed with zero chemistry?! 😢
Story of my life, I'm not short of interest but the only ones I want don't want me, or don't behave properly for a relationship to develop, it's so frustrating. I might have to settle for a guy with no chemistry.
Hi Bern, great video. I would love a video expanding on vetting a guy (with questions etc) on the dating app before going on a 1st date. Sometimes I do ask what they are hoping to find through the app, but that's a loaded question that can come off a little too strong if not worded properly. what do you think?
🙌🏽 YES!🙏🏽
Absolutely!
There are things for that I see in their profile. What do you see in their profile that you would automatically nix them? Mine is when they say drama, crazy and does not want it to be an interview, they have never married or been in a relationship longer than ten years.
This would be great
If your question scares them off before meeting, they are not looking for something serious and you'll be wasting your time. What they say in their profile is also key like "I just want something casual, easy going, no drama, just want to have fun etc"
I love you so much. You are a blessing
You're welcome!
I called a man out who contacted me two years after ghosting me. I am tired of being "nice". I will not go out on a date until the actions are shown right out of the gate.
Amen honey , damn right my thoughts and heart exactly , put into words neither will i they aggravation and heartbreak they cause with their head games, is not worth it to me, as i need peace in my life as id rather be alone , just me and my little daughter.God bless you always .🌹💖💖🎉
Here's to you moving forward : )
I did that to a man after he ghosted me. Literally yelled at him over text. He apologized and said he isn't ready for a relationship. Men NEED to be called out on bad behavior. Read the book Why Men Love Bitches.
@@jenniferl1908 Yesss girl! Not ready for a relationship my 🍑
@@BrooklynBaby100 🤣😂🙌🏽👊🏽
@Bernardo Mendez ,glad to see pioneers leading conscious men movement.🙏🏼💟
Rya, thank you for your kind words, glad the videos are helpful to you.
Hi. Appreciate your views on relationships. However, I've heard and read somewhere that the feeling of butterflies in the stomach is more so a warning that something is off. I'd look more into the meaning of what this means from a more spiritual perspective from a psychological view too.
it's your instinct, intuition, listen to it, and I agree it's a little warning to keep your guard up
Butterflies in your stomach can mean many different things sometimes it's because something is off but many times it's excitement and a sense of adventure.
Fill our own cup and give only and ever from our cup's overflow. Invest then test to meet and match levels of reciprocity. Ask good questions and test with a small "no" from the get go. Have an exit plan and know to GOSO when you spot 🚩 🚩 Know yourself, your standards, values and non-negotiables and be able to express yourself in empathetic yet boundarised ways that clearly informs them of our needs and how to treat us, thanks Bern. 👌👁️✍️💝⛲ 💝👍
What is GOSO? Thanks.
@@heatherjane1919 Get Out Stay Out, and never look back. You're most welcome Heather, avagooday! ✌️
@@louisegarner8888 Love this. Thank you!
You're so welcome Louise. Glad you got value out of this video.
Great Video Bern! Thank you for your wisdom Brother 🙏🏽
You’re welcome :)
Absolutely right Bern
Glad you found it helpful, Tejinder!
Create a dating plan that actually works today: bit.ly/my-dating-cure-training
Yesss!! "An Epic Relationship"❤️🙏🏼
: )
Last relationship was 8 months ago. Guy from the past has been passive, breadcrumbing and boring. I’ve been going on dates as practice to get used to going on dates again. Rotational dating beginning.
Thanks for sharing Alya : )
Overprojecting and obession= Limerence. Bad bad bad place to be.
Thanks for watching : )
💝EXCELLENT !!!! ADVICE !!!!!!💝
Thank you!
Yes , sure, ask the right questions, but more times than not you'll get told what they think you want to hear, all lies. Nothing you can do about that.
The words someone shares with you are only part of the story, how they share the words and most importantly the specific, measurable actions that flow after said words, matter too. You can't prevent men from lying to you but you can certainly learn to vet men better so that you can identify the lies sooner rather than later. Hope this helps.
Useful Tips 👍
Glad you liked it, Rya.
@@BernMendez ,glad to see pioneers to lead conscious men movement.
Love Your Channel and Content! Just came across Your Channel, I've hit the Subscribe button 😁. The Simplicity of Your content and how You deliver it 🥰 definitely exactly what I need for my current & future season (to take me from a 9 to a 10😌). Thank you 🙏🏼💌
"As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another."
__ Proverbs 27:17
Desiree, welcome aboard! Excited to hear you're finding my content useful.