Get used to DISAPPOINTING WOMEN: consumptive love is never satisfied
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- Опубліковано 29 чер 2023
- Men and women love differently. Feminine love is consumptive: it wants as much of you inside of her as possible. However, when it is actually successful in its objective, it grows disinterested in that which it was once fascinated. It falls to men to hold the line against this consumption for the good of both parties, which will require them to occasionally disappoint their women. Those who fail to develop this skill will learn to regret it.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #women #relationship
Men and women love differently. Feminine love is consumptive: it wants as much of you inside of her as possible. However, when it is actually successful in its objective, it grows disinterested in that which it was once fascinated by. It falls to men to hold the line against this consumption for the good of both parties, which will require them to occasionally disappoint their women. Those who fail to develop this skill will learn to regret it.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #women #relationship
If feminine love is consumptive, what is the best word to describe masculine love?
@@justarthur1788Perhaps a providing love
@@justarthur1788 I'll stay in this comment section until a word has been found for masculine love.
Feminine ‘love’ (generally speaking) is ‘consumptive’ as stated, self-serving, drawing all phenomena unto herself…only then can she feel free to ‘love’ in a limited way that suits her wants and needs only.
Masculine love (generally speaking) is expansive, all-encompassing, looking outwards, idealistic (in a positive way) transforming, a love that reaches beyond just himself, towards the stars, a love that benefits ALL.
@@samuelbeatsminecraft2049
Expansive. All-encompassing.
Disappointing women isn't a skill; it's literally effortless. No matter what you do, she will be disappointed.
What requires skill is not caring what women want.
Well said ..... There are very few women you can please in this world ....
If you care too little and give too less, she is gone too.
A man should be genuine, and strive for what he needs and wants, in trustful and truthful interactions with other persons - he should be open, and see if his and her aims and values align in a relationship. Not use any faking tricks and games. Not assuming this or that. Be manly and dare to talk. Nobody will be as disppointed as the one who was cheated into believing that false was true.
If a man wants a one night stand, he should say so. If his aim is a life-long marriage, he should not only show it in words but also in his every act and consideration - it is a demanding, but rewarding goal, but it doesn't come on wishful demand, it has to be a result of daily effort and responsibility. But it is very rewarding to achieve something difficult and valuable. A man can naturally negotiate for something in between, too - most importantly dare to be honest!
Just be a man..done
@@DNA350ppmyes. Honesty and no games.
How to do make a woman miserable? Give her everything that she wants.
To be fair, the same can be said of men
@@Amlux1984true, but I think that men are less likely to throw a temper tantrum at our significant other If we get a no for an answer.
Counterpoint: The fastest way to prove a woman has no idea what she wants is to give her what she asks for. (Note of caution, this can also be very expensive)
😂🤣😅😆
What you mean? All women are miserable, it's just they hide it well
From decades of experience playing the field, to quitting playing music and devoting my life and resources to a single woman's well-being, self-esteem and even her immediate family, I can regretfully say, that this is 100% true. I wish I had seen this video in 2012.
Man, I’m so sorry for your experience.
I feel like a lot of women are told “you can do better” and a lot of men are told “if she’s for you then you won’t have to try” and I think people should leave all that behind and be themselves. Whoever fits well with you as you are and makes you happy is for you. You wont have to force, you won’t have to ask for more, you wont have to go out of your way more than you already do. Communicate and be respectful. Not so simple in practice but it should be.
What you saying is like- there should be thieves, people should be more sensible and you’re right but that isn’t the case
We have to police the world
Similarly, it’s always good to know who you’re dealing with to have better results.
And some men do get played very miserably and those gfs and wives don’t even care at all.
@@Akrazzyy we can always work towards sensibility, starting with ourselves. We’ll find people who resonate and we’ll know who we’re dealing with by spending time with them. Yes men and women are treated poorly by each other and some people have no remorse. It’s our job to be better at judging character and to be of good character ourselves.
one of the few sensible comments on here, I feel like a lot of men use this advice to excuse their misfortunes on love when in reality it’s as simple as setting boundaries on a relationship.
@chio1877 to be fair men setting boundaries is more maligned than the inverse. But you're right. We're all adults. We can say no.
Married 21 years here. No matter what you do, you will disappoint her. Get used to it.
True and it only gets worse, live with it
I think his idea os more that you disappoint her under your control. That she will be more and more disappointed by everything you give her, is a given.
She disappoints herself by setting her own expectations.
That just makes me even less interested in marriage and relationships.
@@latt.qcd9221 hormones, we all got them
Yup. Same goes for children. Giving them everything they want is disastrous and irresponsible.
Exactly. What these videos are about are children with curvy bodies, not mature women.
@@Pomoscorzoimagine believing that isn't the super-majority of women anyways.
@@PomoscorzoI'll believe you when I'll meet one.
Remember; Women should be treated like the child in the relationship.
@@blastermaster7261 Immature women are more likely to offer their bodies to a man easily, that's why they date them. Grown-up women who can think for themselves and want an equal relationship, want to be friends first and protect their femaleness are uninteresting for guys whose first priority is how quickly and how often they can get laid.
You want sex, you get nothing but sex. And you pay, with money, time and stress.
I am very used to disappointing women. So many women are so, so disappointing.
Rejection and disappointment are spices to people with low I.Q, low self esteem, and masochists. Normal person moves on to a partner that is interested. It's called having dignity.
bingo..this is the comment i was looking for
dude abides
I'm so glad someone said this!
The only women who are attracted to men that reject and dissapoint them are women who grew up with a father figure who rejected and dissapointed her.
Mature women with healthy self esteem prefer partners who treat them with kindness and respect.
well, by the bell curve you could literally say 60% of the entire population is not really that specially, only 23% are lucky enough to have a little bit more IQ, than the average John Doe, while basically the upper 2.5% are not interessted in people, because high IQ indivduals are often isolated or alone.
@@sad_wrangler8515 More like 15% are in a range between z +1 and z+2. And ignorance is a choice regarding one's placement on bell curve.
When someone breaks up with you, go full no contact. Never, ever break that rule.
For a certain period yes. After that period you should reevaluate, once the the hurt heals a bit. If it was a good relationship, and you still want it, then start talking again.
@@swim3530 only, and I mean, ONLY if they initiate contact first. Otherwise they are dead. You can never contact them again. Otherwise, you're coming to the table with a weaker hand, and open yourself to be taken advantage of.
disagree. I think either person can initiate contact esp. if it was a mutual breakup, grew apart. The problem is most fems get really bitter if you breakup with them, and rejected them. They cant get over it! Meanwhile guys get rejected all the time! Fragile egos for being so "strong and independent"!? 😆
I think that limiting oneself from following the heart is itself a weakness, so there is just a choice between two lower status.
However in my perspective both reaching out and not are not considered negative.
@@dampnickers Exactly, she broke up with me and i came back like a dog, never make that mistake
"If you don't give a woman what she wants, She will be unhappy. If you give a woman what she wants she will be miserable".
Lmao
Exactly
A lot of women were not taught how to receive love. So they don't want to feel vulnerable by you leveraging on your gifts
@@morpheus7422a lot of women also haven't been taught how to give love either 😂
Great paradox
In the beginning of our relationship I told him he was the Captain of the ship and I was 2nd in command. He has yet to disappoint me and we are starting year 14. I am not the typical woman because I want my man to spend time with his friends playing golf or just hanging out. He is not in my life to entertain me 24/7. We blended our lives together and I appreciate our time together. All I want from him is that whichbhe gives freely and I have only one expectation of him and that is he love and take care of himself, because you can't give what you don't have.
You are an exceptional woman!! Your husband is a lucky man. If only all women were like you!! God bless!
Only three months in the relationship, and my girlfriend is like you in this regard.
You are wise woman. Many young ladies are self-absorbed and don't figure this out until it is too late for them.
The software inside her head is equal in importance as your attraction to her. Healthy boundaries and expectations is the key to any relationship. Unfortunately today many women don't take the time to consider what her future husband or boyfriend wants out of a relationship until she's too damaged or it's too late. Guys are conditioned by society to be doormats and women to be entitled this will always end badly
This is how the women I know are. The women he describes - I don't recognize these women at all.
I find the idea of always stressing out and thinking of keeping someone very exhausting. Focus on yourself first.. know your limitations and boundaries so when you get involved with someone.. you get there from a place of joy and love.. not attachment and overthinking to keep the person.. you offer yourself for the buyers.. if the buyer is no longer interested.. it’s not personal.. you enjoyed their company already.. and that’s a win.. now you move on lightly and keep doing your thing which is focusing on being your authentic self under all circumstances.
Disappointing women? Dude I was born for this.
LOL Yes!
😂😂
Lmao
😂😂
😂😂😂
“You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.”
- Chris Rock
It's not like you get that with men. I mean, look at all the cheerful, satisfied men leaving comments under this video.
Oh, wait, bad example.....
@PGHEngineer I read it more as venting from personal experience. I see that venting and never being satisfied as two completely different things
@@CastleRaccon I see it as complaining about life when they are with women, but subtly revealing how obsessed they are with getting with a woman just by being here and moaning incessantly about it.
😭
He's not wrong.
This is ESPECIALLY harder in Single Mother homes because our relationship personality develops based on keeping a usually narcissistic mom happy....which transfers to girlfriends & wives.
Don’t disrespect moms by generalizing that single moms are narcissists. Maybe yours was but don’t speak for other people. At the end of the day at least one person was there for a 2 person job.
@@callme_t you could've easily kept it moving if this was not about you, but this statement was for those who AGREED, so you can move along and kick rocks✌🏾
@@thaxtonwaters8561 i love this
@@callme_tmine definitely was (and still very much is) narcissistic. The reason there was only “one person for a two-person job” was because she kicked my father out and thought life would be nicer if she just did everything herself.
@@callme_t why is it disrespectful? It's just a clinical term
The more she likes you the more she'll want more from/of you - this is consumptive feminine love.
Be the person that the women fell in love with. (lifestyle)
The more you agree to her wants the more she'll feel powerful
This makes relationships seem like a waste of time and unnecessary head games just to keep one party interested. We are doomed 😂
Mmm not really. I would argue that its generally typical human social behavior. In my opinion a healthy individual (male or female) will establish boundaries in all of their relationships, be personal, family, friendship or work related. Its just part of being in a community. Dealing with woman is no different in my opinion. And to be fair to women, men have a degree of that same attribute. It's just not as prominent I don't think.
@@TheMonkeygruntIt’s one thing to have boundaries, and it's another thing to have boundaries you have to constantly enforce. Women want as if they're entitled to your being simply from having the title of girlfriend whereas your friends behave completely differently. My friends can fuction if I don't see them for a month. My girl on the otherhand...that wpuld be an issue. He's right, the neediness makes you question if a relationship is even worth it. To be fair, family does have entitlement too but it doesn't threaten to strip your autonomy to the degree of a woman's love. A woman's love gradually just heads in the direction of codepedence: she wants you to be her best friend, she wants to move in with you, she wants to sleep in the same bed, she wants you to commit to her emotionally and physically, ahe wants you to marry her, she wants to watch shows together, she wants to hangout together on the weekends, she wants your last name, she wants to be a part of your family...friendships aren't like this at all. That's why I think friendships are the healthiest relationship, because it's completely voluntary at every step of the way ( you don't have to pledge your commitment to your friends), and there's no entitlement because of it. I don't know the shit is annoying. I literally work with my girlfriend and I feel like I have to explain to her every week why it's ok for me to want space from her, and my days off to myself, as if I didn't spend a majority of my work day interacting with her lol. With my friends I don't have to explain shit. I just say I'm bysy, but I'll chill with you later and the world keeps spinning. It does seem like more effort than it's worth at times.
@@joungyalen25 idiots cant see the difference between men and women and keep insisting on "it not just about women, its about humans"
Thats why women were controlled in past
the channel title says it upfront - he is a hack. he is not a real psychologist, it's like Elizabeth Holmes if psychology channels. But since youtube is popular among cluster B disordered people and occasionally codependents who need the cult leader, he get the views. Same with teal swan - she get millions of views despite misleading info. None of them are qualified or actually knowledgeable.
This advice is G O L D
I cannot stress enough how important this is.
Should be mandatory education for every teen/young man.
No guy should waste his time on drama with women, whatever kind it may be
Simps deserve the worse scorn and punishment possible
If you know that this is GOLD-class advice, then its secret power makes me want to hear from your wife: what makes her so happy about being your partner in life - because I myself can't imagine how come - it sounds impossible. What makes her so happy about you that this advice functions?
No the only advice for this generation is to ensure pregnancy and marriage doesnt occur which will avoid all the issues. For this guys should immediately take his girlfriend to get Tubal Ligation and still buy and give her daily birth control pills after taken in front of you and also Plan B pill after consulting with a doctor each time after intercourse.
@@rejectionistmanifesto8836 Better he gets himself a vasectomy, it is easier, safer and cheaper. A one time effort. 😀 But use condoms anyway, not to catch STD!!! (Mind you, condoms are totally within a man's control. In some countries you get them for free.)
@@DNA350ppm yes he should also but it is just as crucial to also get his girlfriend to do it if she wants a relationship.
You hit the nail on the dot. It's sad for me. I found this out after the age of 25. However, I learned not to give women everything they wanted, and somehow, I found more women being drawn to me. Maybe I just had to grow up and have more self-respect. I feel great now. It took me so long to figure all this out
I've just discovered this channel, now I'm binge watching. You describe all of the problems I have encountered. I have never had problems attracting women, but so often I have either pleased them to the point they lose respect, or I become resentful that all my efforts and time don't elicit the response I was expecting. It's all so clear now 🤦♂️
Brother just broke down the psychology of simping. 👍
Same goes for disappointment of her kids.
Forget about simping, the fact that he said that disappointing is a spice of a relationship 😅 what ???????!!!!! 😂 This is pure nonsense. Is not even logical. I know that women are different psicologicaly speaking, but, the fact that a so called psicologist could encourage disappointment is a new one for me.
You got it backwards
@@mauriciolopez1235 Most nice guys are people pleasers. When it comes to a woman they worship her and just cannot say no to anything she wants no matter how unreasonable.Try that and see how it works out.
@@mauriciolopez1235Women are like children....what happens when you give a kid everything....
This is pretty spot on….
My (now ex) girlfriend of almost a year came to me and said I’m not affectionate enough and that she wants me to use more words of affirmation, use more emotion when texting, use “I love you” instead of “love you”, etc. I made a serious effort to start doing those things after that conversation.
She broke up with me 2 weeks later.
Too little, too late. I'm sorry for you!
😂😂😂 “broke up w me 2 weeks later.” Trolled you.
@@learncadadia7832 100% lol
@@learncadadia7832 There you go, decent women don't understand men's double speak! I can't believe you have much success with such parole.
You should have ignored her.
Wow.. I found this vid right when was going through a tough relationship. We only lasted like 3 years and I was pleasing her in everything: Money, time and some other stuff.. The point is that no matter what / how much you give her, you'll always be the bad guy in the movie and she'll also find any excuse to victimize and blame you for any single sh!t.
This vid has switched my mind 360 degrees. Thanks bro for opening men's eyes and makes understand how women's mentality work.
treat em mean, keep em keen.
Don't lose your chivalry but at the same time don't lose your dignity you have to keep both of them it's not that they see you as weaker it's that you lose your dignity to them
Thanks for timeless wisdom! The dance of life can be confusing if you dance in the dark! Thank you for turning some lights on!💡
Saying NO to her will make her respect you.
Saying too much YES all the time to her, will make her leave you.
Always saying no is the best. There are studies out there that narcissistic behavior on the side of the man had zero negative impact on average for a relationship, also the archtype with the highest numbers of women are Dark Triade, basically narcissistic, violent and manipulative men.
So on point when it comes to female nature. This should be dating 101 for every man. So many of us get our programming from Disney movies and it's not helpful at all.
It's not about just women. It's about humans in general.
The man is a rich handsome prince and the woman has nothing like Cinderella.
and remember programming by (grnd.) mthr.s from earliest on. not necessarily deserving per-default-(!!)-halo, to be sincere. merely xx.s in any inherent aspect, too.
Facts, once you realize this you win at life
You should probably get out there and look for modest personalities in other women. What the guy describes is like if they only have one type of woman out there lol.
I mean, i dunno. When a woman told me no, i got less interested clearly. This whole "the harder to get the more you want it" menatlity is just fundamentally toxic and miserable in my experience...
Agreed.
Hahahahaha wow way to completely miss the point
This kind of presentation is really great because it doesn’t seem to be polarized for or against men and women. These are just straight facts and they are useful.
Note that getting used to *disappointing women* has two meanings:
1) The art of disappointing women
2) Acceptibg that women are deceiving in their nature
3) Ending up alone 😂
Initially I read it as get used to women just being disappointing 😂
@@taranjitronaldinhify Same here. And I would fully subscribe to that notion.
Basic life lesson!
That’s some misogynistic thinking
@@ms.altareb9935 Having high expectations of women's
- emotional maturity and
- ethical standards
is "misogynistic"?😲
OK, mea culpa 😥
A woman will never be satisfied, ever, no matter how much you try and give, never.
The best approach? Have fun while you are with her, don't try too hard don't try too little, just the right amount, enjoy every minute you're with her because rest assured she'll leave, enjoy her while she's still here.
That's the biggest red pill in my personal experience and opinion
Wiser than average
❤❤ Absolutely love it!!
Guys don’t say this is wise or that you love it. This is absolutely fucking wrong and an incredible tragedy that this man thinks that. Vicente, women are real people. People lose respect for you over time when you continually disrespect them by thinking of them as less than or that you have to play these weird games. It sounds like this is the real issue for most people in these comments.
@@ProfessorThock I've had several women, I'm talking from experience and from friends and colleagues anecdotes. On top of that you find men online who can rely with what is being said.
You just don't like it because it makes women look bad, well, too bad, they're human beings, and very flawed human beings at that.
A man should never hate women, be he should never pedestalize them either
@@ProfessorThock ? All he's saying is to enjoy the time you have with your woman and don't be a simp. It's sage advice. He didn't say anything about them being less than. He's simply accepted the fact that most relationships end and that the appropriate thing to do is enjoy your time with someone and don't get too attached nor neglect them. There's no logical reason to expect someone to be in your life forever so I don't see any issue with his comment.
I really hope that a lot of young men in their late teens, twenties and early thirties are tuning into this. When I was that age there was absolutely NOTHING in the way of relationships advice for younger men. If you were very lucky your father might tell you something, though likely it was 30 years out of date. Your mates you couldn't turn to: they were rivals and in any case they were as ignorant as you. Towards the end of that time I turned to women's magazines - they were written by and for young women but some of it was universal. Not exactly the good old days.
I used to fear rejection by conforming to the women in my life....they eventually left me. Now I understand. I will never conform again. I will be saying no and stand by it!
I'm a 7th degree black belt in disappointing women. Curiously, I never even had to train to get this skill. Other men have tried to best me in this endeavor, but few have ever come close.
Yo!!!,😆😆😆😆😆😆
Naw I got you beat 😩
😂😂😂
You're a G bruv!
Respect! 🫡
😂😂😂😂
Many of the most empty and miserable men I've ever met are "Yes dear" husbands.
Thank you. This is logic! A lot of what you discussed I never took into context until you said it. Too funny. I'm gonna watch again to internalize this new perspective. Thx again
I really enjoyed this video. I pondered to a lot of things you said and I believe a lot of women want their men to be their actual daddy. Give me everything I want but put me in my place when need be. Happy New Year :)
You need to disappoint a woman early on. If you, like me, are way too friendly and giving in to everything she says, she will slowly lose respect. As soon as she puts you in low value land, and you suddenly start to change behaviour, that’s very upsetting to women, and she might cut you off completely if she can’t receive any value from you anymore.
That’s why I have to keep reminding myself to set boundaries EARLY in the progression of things and take control of my friendlyness. But it’s easier said than done, even though you are doing it with your best intentions to succeed with her, it doesn’t feel like that in the moment.
I agree with this 100%.
Just say no😂
Agree. But on the other hand it feels silly to reject about minuscule things just because I should reject something.
@@fredrikdippel3664i see it as silly too, but they say in the Wire: "The Gane is the Game."
@@fredrikdippel3664 - he isn't saying refuse her EVERYTHING.
He is saying use your own discretion and don't agree to what you don't honestly agree with. Not all Yes or all No. Don't be a pushover or she will lose any respect for you.
“A woman in love wants to put you inside of her…”
Yup, sounds about right.
or she wants to put herself inside of you. That way she can control you.
😂😂 💯
"I'm talkin' 'bout baaaalls deep in loooove." - Cleveland Brown, Jr.
@@Dannyblazer1985with all my hand and my arm
This was excellent. Thank you.
I've had thoughts like this but you voiced it so clearly, and I really experienced the 'giving too much' in my last relationship and we both ended up feeling drained.
This is a great channel. This guy hits it correctly all the time.
The key is indifference. When you can disappoint them and not care about the out come.
Precisely. So many men think indifference is the key to keeping a woman. No. Indifference is indifference. It's not caring whether she stays or leaves.
@@IkesPimpHand Its not about not caring. We are humans, of course we care if our loved one leaves. What takes strength and character is standing on your principles and doing the right thing even if she might leave.
Maintaining some detachment with your attachments is a tricky thing.
So true. I quit on women entirely a decade ago and it was like I flipped on a light switch and was suddenly visible to them. Same guy, same values, I just stopped thinking about my life relative to them and suddenly I was desirable even to strangers since I now give off a completely different vibe.
If the key is indifference then why be in a relationship in the first place? What kind of relationship are you trying to build if you’re numb to how you disappoint them? Generally speaking, a person who lacks conviction for disappointing people are also less likely to hold themselves accountable.
The reason why men don't want to disappoint women is because they fear they cannot find another if she then rejects him. This is however the best thing that can happen because its acting like a quality filter to find a BETTER one.
Women ARE the matrix
That’s a great perspective 🤔!
it also is because some men do legitimately value her, it's just it ends up making it unbalanced unintentionally. Some people you value a person not out of scarcity but out of familiarity, a sense of investment and because they legitimately like that person. I have loved a few woman a lot but have moved on easily. It's not just about scarcity.
Which also leads to my point that this video's generalizing theory is just that. I raise all the doomsayers my relationship in its 3rd decade that's always been satisfyingly balanced in the give and take department. Ymmv
@@zendakk what point are you trying to make other than bragging your relationship is in its 3rd decade?
The main management technique i do is tell them women no and disagree with them 85% of the time without explanation. Works perfectly
Mate bang on thank you for putting this together so accurately. I just came out of a relationship wherein this is a jewel of learning for me
This video should be watched by every single man wanting to be in a relationship. This is an extremely important video. It should be watched 10 times by every guy!
❤
Thanks for the support, Joe. I really appreciate it.
Thanks for supporting brother ,,, really appreciate ❤
❤️❤️❤️ Life changing, if it used wisely!!!!
I agree, had I been taught this type of content in high school my life would have been changed for the better. I am a good guy but I made huge Blue Pill mistakes like marrying @ age 19.
If you want to ruin your relationship, give them everything they want.
Men work two fulltime jobs
OMG! I've learnt so much from you - thanks. Keep up the good work.
I was married for 28 years and ended it last September. I was in a constant state of capitulating to her. I was actually fearful of disappointing her. Well, I was miserable for the majority of the relationship but it had quickly become my normal state of being. I did not know any better. If I had known the truth of this episode, my reality would have been different. But, now it is and I am loving life and who I am. Thank you, Orion. Life changing. Young men, listen and believe this.
Keep on keeping on, brother
I did not capitulate, I did my own things and she dumped me brutally after 20 years of marriage.
That's an opportunity to live your life less with her making you miserable@@marguskiis7711
Yes! Young men
Listen up very carefully. Do no ignore red flags that are waved right in your face. I did that for 20yrs....It got me nothing but heartaches, anxiety , sadness and an empty bank account. Eyes but especially EARS wide open
Seeing comments like yours on this channel makes me feel better that I got out of mine in 9 years. It started off well, ups and downs but then was maintained by me capitulating to her ever taller demands of me and her not understanding that I need to sacrifice going out on dates for my career. Every time I'd not go out with her and prioritise work, she would start emotion dumping about how she's feeling alone and caged and this and that. I'd tell her that if she wants to keep going out late at nights with her friends drinking, then me and her aren't going to work out. So she would use that to manipulate me, whether she realised it or not, to at least have me go out with her. Like, relax woman. Going out only a couple times a month until I get my finances up was too much for her. "At least once a week". And I live in a small city with nothing to do but visit the same odd cafes, bars, theatres, I don't know what the hell she got out of it. I was fine watching netflix with her while screensharing. We couldn't live together cause she lived with her parents.
Men shouldn't be afraid of disappointing women, including dumping them or feeling bad for not reciprocating their feelings, because life is a series of disappointments and in fact, they need to get to know this while they can still handle it. If it's not you, something else will disappoint them. You can't shield people from disappointments.
It's not easy to kiss the mouth that chews out your ass all day.
I can not thank u enough. Now everything makes sense in my life. I have applied ur wisdom and 100% assure that ur words are correct.
Once I came to realize this fully, I learned to take joy in disappointing her, because it is just a reminder for her who actually runs the show.
To put it another way, women have actually evolved to feed on negative emotions as much as positive ones. So long as she FEELS something, she isn't bored. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference
A woman saying no to me doesn’t make me want her more.
Yeah.. I was gonna say, this too was the only part of his video I disagreed with.
Idk your personality, but generally I've observed, the less your crush(works for both genders) is attracted to you, the more you're attracted to them. Finally if it's a person you never wanted, nothing will happen.
This whole video is dumb
@@anshumannbele4373 Maybe this is just a majority case? Like most ppl being like this. But im right with him, a no makes me want em less
No = no. I can never want someone more if they say NO. To do so would be creepy and needy. If they say no, it's a no
this is a great explanation for a problem my friend has: all his girlfriends end up liking him as a friend and they eventually break up without any passion or emotion or need for each other. it fizzles out completely. because he's extremely conflict avoidant and he boasts he never, ever fights with his girlfriends on anything, including very petty tiny arguments. But that's actually the problem. He becomes a butler that's rent-free.
I think u need to have downs to remember the ups. Women are emotional beings, they Need to feel a range of emotion, not picture perfect love on a pedestal
@@agentnukaz1715 I will remember this to compose better music 👌
If she dont bring drama, bring the drama to her and play with her emotions.
But this man just spoke about how to not fight a woman.
One good example would be, my oldest friend just called to ask if I want to hang out. At first I said yes cause I want to,(duh) then I quickly said: I might be saying that, but I'm really too tired, I just got back form a weekend with my brother&sisterinlaw. And she was okey with that
Pay attention to this
Especially the young guys and the SIMPS!!!
Very well put man
You’ve earned a subscriber 👍🏻
My wife never is satisfied with any of my accomplishments but boy she love points out my flaws and tells me what I’m not doing and not pursuing her enough. I told her yesterday, would you pursue someone if they’re always bring up your flaws and belittling you? It’s like the lightbulb went off but then she went back to her expectations of me and how I’m not meeting them. 😂
Hahaha you gotta say deuces ✌️
If I was you, I would begin putting all of your assets under your moms name and file for divorce before she divorce g*rapes you into oblivion(sui/cide).
Yep, she has to go. She's only bringing down your mental health and unless she's putting out once a day and twice on Saturday she's not worth it. Scrape her off.
your life sounds like an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond
@@odoylerules4503 damn, cant bitch my way out of that one. 🤣
This is why we say "just be yourself". Continue doing what you were doing and what you genuinely want to keep doing. She won't magically stop liking you for it.
big ol fax my friend
I find it funny how women will say be yourself but then when you get into a relationship, they want you to be a totally different person.
@@jameslay1489and then when she successfully changed you, she will lose interest and leave you. Remember fellas, just be yourself.
"just be yourself" is the worst advice you can ever give to a person lol.
@@ishitrealbad3039 then be someone else idc
Who has time to play their childish games ?
Thank you so much for the info, could have not been explained better, this makes sense.
Absolutely true. If I had known this 10 years ago I would have saved so much time, energy, and resources.
@@eladbari Meaning either navigating the relationship better, getting out sooner, or avoiding it altogether.
Same
One of the reasons im glad i was born in this time and can learn these things at 20 y/o
Man, I know right?
This actually makes alot of sense. I broke up with my ex because it seemed the harder I tried to please her, the more she found fault in everyrhing I did. I was sort of left in a constant "damned if I do, damned if I dont" state of mind with it all. Once the depressive emotions started surfacing I pulled the plug. Im too old to be trying to live up to anyones standards (and approval) but my own and my childrens.
Glorious Disappointing Master of the Shaolin Temple For Disappointing-Women-Fu here. I'm an expert trainer of disappointers of women because I have disappointed so many of them. They key is, my son, you must really lean into the disappointment. Go out of your way to disappoint her in strange and inventive ways.
If she asks for a drink of water, throw a banana cream pie in her face. If she asks you to take her out to dinner, put on a chicken costume and dance a mambo. If she asks you to meet her family, dress up like a pirate and speak only as a pirate for the next 7 weeks. Women love disappointment and she will be putty in your hands. OR not. Most likely not. But the key is, you were never going to make her happy anyway so at least you had fun with your disappointments. Glad I didn't help at all.
Holy HELL. HOW HAVE I NOT STUMBLED ACROSS YOUR CHANNEL EARLIER?!
Great 👍 👌 video, and I can relate to this topic throughout my life. This video is an excellent step by step reminder of how we men must not be afraid to be appropriately disappointing to women and on our purpose as a priority.
Women want what they can't get,
Women want what other women have
A good plan if you like to be unhappy.
That's the same for everybody
@@macrickNo it isn't. Men overall aren't group thinkers even if there's comformists.
Women want what other women want (especially men) since it secures the success of their offspring.
@@edheldudeMen are group thinkers too. Why do you think revolutions happen on a large scale ? The only thing is men can survive being a lonewolf while women can't.
@@anshulguptain yeah i think it's probably on a spectrum which is dependent on multiple factors. But generally speaking, it's safe to say women are more collectivist and conformist than men.
I just got out of a relationship where I kept folding to her demands and it was never enough, i was always critcized and told I could do better. 8 months of this push anr pull relationship, i was miserable, but it was a trauma bond. I finally ended it this week.
Im ready to get back to who I was and this advice is gold, set your boundaries early and if its enough to let them walk, then let them.
This video came at a perfect time for me... God bless you all and hope you prosper!
Wow🙏 God bless you 💚
Good luck with your recovery, dude.
That trauma bond 100% comes from dealing with a jezebel spirit, it’s like for some reason you find it soo hard to leave this crazy bih despite seeing 🚩like Chinese parade
Respect.
Respect yourself enough to make sure she respects you.
Often all you have to do with a demanding woman... is nothing.
Don't be swayed in any way.
I've just experienced the exact same situation. Though my dumbass stayed in it for over 3 years. Kudos to you for knowing when to pull the plug. Staying any longer would have been detrimental to your mental health.
Such a great way to level expectations AND having a balance in the giving and receiving!!
I realized, that I need to learn something once she asked: ”Are you happy?”
And once I said:”Yes, you made me happy!”
She replied: ”I go out tonight, alone.”
Since that moment I started to develope resistance against the natural atraction, if I listen my instinct of ”she looks good and kind”, I’ll end up being hurt.
I don't care what they want. I say No every 5 minutes. I've been with my wife for 9 years.
This. They will love your Daddy energy when you can see their best interests better than they can, and rationally yet firmly tell them no.
Yeah right
@DuncanL7979 this 100%
The only time my wife was 100% into me was when we were dating and she knew I had side pieces.
🎯🎯🎯🎯 "the best type of relationship is when the woman is just a little insecure"- Patrice O'Neal. She knew she had to be on her pees and cues.
Ooooo😮
Bro I swear to god I think all women are like this. Same thing thing with my wife, she was OBSESSED with me when I had 9s and 10s chasing me around. I was the better looking partner and she was more like a 7/8 on the looks scale.
But I ended up choosing her instead of the 9s and 10s because I figured hey the less prettier one will be the least likely to be tempted to cheat. Well turns out she cheated anyway with an absolute loser coworker. It didn’t last for more than 1 month before she couldn’t stand him.
Now she wants me back LOL! Women truly are atrocious decision makers. Yes some women are intelligent and not like this but the vast majority are.
@@erko78 that’s my story and I may have been cheated on with some beta
I blocked her man do the same
@@erko78
You probably know by now that less attractive women are actually MORE likely to cheat, due to lower self-esteem and greater insecurity.
This is spot on , say yes seldom and for reasonable things but , don’t make promises you can’t keep, just say No especially in outrageous demands with bad timing
This dude is the REAL dating coach on youtube
Nailed it, this is why my marriage ended, I tried to give her everything she wanted within reason and gave everything I could give, when I realized it was never going to be enough and started reigning things in after 11 years, she became more vicious and manipulative than I had ever realized she was capable of. I told her no and stood my ground often, which kept he interested, and fueled my irritation at her lack of satisfaction with my efforts. Lesson, set the boundaries early, don't give more than is reasonable, it won't get you more love or respect, just misery and resentment.
@@yezkex you’re obviously a woman. It would be the stupidest thing possible to sit down and have a conversation about how you “both” (meaning her) want to be loved. That’s literally sitting down to hear her list of demands. The whole point of the video is that you have to disappoint her - you’re willing to provide what you are willing to provide not whatever she wants.
and she can deal with it if she wants to be with you.
@@yezkexLove is an attribute only I have
What if I set boundaries for her and she complains about them and I actually respect her boundaries, what should I do if get into an argument?
@@rdg760jr2 No.. You leave.... Her... Forever... Hypocrisy like this is common and irredeemable
@@rdg760jr2 No explanations needed ... don't be a weakling
What a weird world we live in for relationships to operate this way…
The toxicity of this mindset is unbelievable ! not at all applicable for real life outside their screens 😂
@@chocolat3698 What are you talking about?
That's because of feminism and social media. It was very different 20 years ago
Doesn't apply to all countries
Relationships have always operated this way……
The king has harems of woman pining after him….. biology dictates survival mechanisms for the entire species… our DNA is encoded to procreate and Protect our bloodlines…. For men this means sexual reproduction with as many females as possible in a short time.
For females this means finding a Suitable Partner to protect offspring, and than another if the suitable partner becomes unable to protect offspring.
We are just as bacteria or the smallest organisms, our innate genetics will dictate our macro behaviors as humans.
Male and female. Opposites and One
this is gold, thank you man!
This is my favorite video of yours. I wish every single man could see this video before they start dating
Really great advice! And beware of women that will simply not accept to be disappointed. They will hold onto it, and scowl at you for weeks, months, years, holding onto that thing so that they make sure you feel punished and never repeat that "offense" ever again. Run away from such women.
Too late. But you’re absolutely right.
This is women emotional aggression what you’re talking about.
That's like every woman. Yes all my exes, mum, and crazy female colleagues (which is almost every one who I've interacted enough) are like that
Or just treat them like a toddler.
How do I successfully detach from such a women especially if I see her at work every day
“Women like to test how much they can get away with.” JUST LIKE CHILDREN.
If you are a man, women will test you, children will test you, your dog will test you, even other men will test you.
That's because that's what they are
And just like men..
"I Want It Now! Veruca Salt 'Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory'
They mature to the point of 16 years of age.
Love your videos man, keep doing what u do. Peace.
Wow.
Love this.
It's mostly all things I've heard and embraced along the way -- but NO ONE ever built the whole house the way Dr. Taraban laid it out here.
You're a genius. This is EXACTLY the mistake I made, and she acted/reacted EXACTLY like you describe. PS: This is the first time I've ever left a comment on UA-cam.
Wow
Disappointing a woman or standing up to her, letting her know what your boundaries are and enforcing them is a brilliant way of getting that woman out of your life for good so she can go and jump on a simp who'll never do any of that.
In my experience its the exact opposite. They never last with simps, only with men who respect themselves
@@Jadaks I've heard the same from other men, and I don't doubt your experience. It's that I've only once witnessed what you describe, in a marriage where he took several years to train her to behave properly. I used to know a married woman who admitted to me that it took her husband some time to also train her to behave properly. In the vast majority of the other marriages I've seen, it's clear she doesn't respect her husband, and I guess is only with him for utility, despite him breaking his back for her.
@@Jadaks They don't last with men who respect themselves either, they quickly realize that he won't bend, so they quickly monkey branch.
@Tom-A062 I would disagree with you there. Some woman won't last with men that respect themselves, but im those situations its best that it doesn't last because, to me, that means she isn't looking for a partner, she's looking for someone she can take advantage of. Every GOOD woman I've ever known greatly respects a man that respects himself and is confident in himself.
@@TheMonkeygrunt That's how single women used to behave. They don't any more. What I mainly see around me is women using men, and men seemingly happy to be her servant. I also see men who treat their women like sh1t, and that's also how to keep her around. Respect yourself and be confident in yourself is repulsive to women.
Great video this is the best explanation of this phenomenon that I've seen.
Really needed to hear this.
Believe it or not this message makes me (and probably other men) less likely to pursue a relationship. Too many unpredictable, frivolous moving parts just to continue qualifying. F**k their wants, desires, & expectations.
see for me this changes everything, this is pretty much the key to the last relationship I had which was extremely painful for the reasons stated in the vid. Get back on the horse, just when they go to walk away, just don't follow them.
Relationships are not worth it. I was a diehard, romantic, and a monogamist. Never again. I’ve learned too many hard lessons. Modern women have no role, they have no direction, and no boundaries slap that on top of being endlessly selfish and you have a recipe for disaster every time, they never take accountability and they don’t believe in self sacrifice. I just have fun with them now they’re basically just accessories at this point. And again this is coming from someone who was searching for the love of his life ever since he was old enough to know what that meant.
@@Trax_travels same here. I was really a great man and really want to treat good my woman. But now I know they are basically never ever satisfy why should I lose my time, energy, money on someone who will never be satisfy…?
Agreed
this attitude won't help you buddy. as humans, we've got the need to make relationships and to satisfy our romantic wants. you should just face the reality of human behavior as it is and live your life based on it
Damn, I knew this so well before I got married. 35 years later and I have all but forgotten about this truth. End result is, after loosing myself she is now gone, too. Smh.
wow even after 35 long years..
@@pacha777 It's really sad isn't it, the length really DOES NOT matter when it comes to Women. On the other hand, you have the Sunken Cost Fallacy. The thing is, you only get one life with a limited amount of time in it.
Sorry to hear that. 😞
I'm 27 y.o man. At this point I stopped beliving in love. It just doesn't exist for me. In fact I dont exist to women. They never even wanna talk with me.
I genuinely enjoyed watching this.
Man you just described how my long time relationship ended, I was doing everything and changing who I was to become something that would bring her and closer, and the worst part when it all ended I couldn’t recognize myself anymore, thanks for sharing you knowledge.
Greetings from Brazil.
❤😢
Hey bro just know you‘re not alone, been in the exact same boat as you. Still regret how i couldn‘t hold my own ground. greetings from Germany
Women ☕
espero q as coisas ja tenham melhorado cara, tmj nessa
@@Vrunge90 obrigado amigo, em momentos como esse aprendemos que somos mais fortes do que pensavamos, e saímos deles mais resilientes. Tamo junto!
As a man you just literally not have to care about any woman. The biggest key to a relationship is the guy being 30-50 percent less interested in the woman than she is in him.
That only works if you're up in the top 5% of men. Then too, only 6s and at best a small town 7 will desire you like that. But I think once you have the commitment then you can play hot and cold in this way to keep her interested. They usually clue in as the relationship starts to get older. Ultimately, all these rules are to get a foot in the door and the first few steps. Soon as the waters get choppy, it is very unpredictable what you'll do or what she'll do and how you would react to it together. You can't be prepared for the long term without having a personality that is compatible with hers. Especially in terms of having a more aligned than misaligned moral compass.
@@ItsMeChillTymeyou are wrong, you don't need to be in 5% club for that. If a woman is interested in you, you need to start balancing the power between you and her by becoming less interested in her than she is in you
Keep your friends, your interests, hobbies, season tickets, subscriptions and get a motorbike, all of these will help you retain your identity & secure your independence.
On the op theme of consumptive love, first they try to detach you from the people, relationships & things that make you, you.
Like a kid with a wasp, once she's pulled off your legs and wings you're lucky if you're just roasted with the magnifying glass. More likely she will simply lose interest and move on while you're lost and helpless.
Such wise words!! Duly noted!!
I’m ahead of my time, I’ve been disappointing all my life.
Man this episode hits the nail right on the head. So true
It's also through disappointment and conflict where you reveal a person's true colors and character.. You're not really learning anything about your partner when everything is sunshine and rainbows. One of the worst things you could do is marry a woman without walking through some fires with her.
I'm 50 years old, never married but have had my share of women in my lifetime. I've made this mistake before. I sure do wish this golden knowledge were around back in my day. No men ever dropped wisdom like this to me or anyone I know. Young men, take note of these videos! Learn from the mistakes of others. The worst mistake you can make is to believe that women think like men and that just because you would or wouldn't do something that they would or wouldn't. Every man I know has been cheated on and none of them saw it coming.
i’m 23, ty for your comment. i’m taking notes
I've been watching videos like this for a few years now and it occurred to me awhile back that women are screwed. You can't put this information back in the bottle. Men from every corner of the globe young and old have come together to crack the code. The internet isn't going away. Just think about what it's going to be like in one hundred years when every guy is well educated in female bullshit by the time they are 20. I honestly think we are watching the dynamics between men and women change forever in real time.
That is true I am 51 and men believe women are all sugar and spice. They ain't. Sure still good women out there but Vet them. Many are selfish because they have it too easy and dont work for it. They just rock up here I am 😆
Mid 50’s married one and divorced…wished I had this knowledge in my 20’s
We had this knowledge, but we ignored it. We wanted to hold onto that woman. I've done it. We all have. It's part of life. Oddly, I don't regret it. I had some good and bad memories.
The best feeling is telling a woman no when she thinks she is entitled to your time and money
People that have no control over their own lives always try to control other people.
Facts
There is a limit. When I get rejected too much my attraction declines.
Well, that's what he meant by the spices analogy.
Love yourself first. Work on yourself, build a body, have a nice car (maintain it). Learn new skills/hobbies. Women get attracted to men who are happy and stable.
@@WhiteWolfos happy and stable... Word 🤔😎
It sounds like that's your perception of your attraction after repeated failings. Just remind yourself that's not how the world outside of your mind is viewing you. The world has no idea. But if you keep thinking that about yourself, you'll naturally give off that negative energy, and carry your body in a way that might tell them. Then they'll treat you accordingly (which is not a good thing). Take it all in stride, and keep trying. That's what I do. Success comes when you least expect it. Just maintain positive energy. Save the sulking and licking your wounds for when you're alone in private or hanging with your most trusted boys.
You should never Give anyone your all wether you’re male or female...also never ever let anyone try and change you
This incredible advice! I literally just had this argument with my gf a few weeks ago after she got upset that I made time to hang out with her, rather than making her my number one priority. I told her outright that if I didn't spend time working on all the cool things she likes, then those cool things about me wouldn't exist.