The way it ALL ENDS: the five endgames that all women face
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
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Given what we understand about female mating and dating behavior, it's possible to play the chess out twenty moves and consider the various endgames that women will face in the sexual marketplace. There are actually not very many. In this episode, I discuss the five ways it can end for any given woman, and provide rough probability estimates for each scenario.
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Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world.
#psychology #dating #women
Experienced divorce lawyer here. Great video! If you are not her first choice DO NOT MARRY her. Genuine burning desire or forget it. Trust me on this. You can’t imagine what I have seen.
@@JC_Somerset sure. I have reached out to Orion to do a collab on either his channel or mine. So much to discuss and dissect on female nature, marriage, hypergamy, divorce laws, and how the most successful men navigate the dating marketplace.
That would make nearly every man 99% a no go situation
They banged chads and still want them and are pissed they couldn’t get them to commit
By the way love your channel. Keep up the good work and being a rational voice for men. I’d be too uncontrolled for media 😂
props
@@hansk6166 one obvious thing is she is ripping your clothes off on a regular basis. Another is she often initiates physical contact. Another is the way she makes it easy for you to be together. I have often said that if a woman has genuine burning desire for you, she will walk through a mine field, in a snow storm, blindfolded, with your favorite hot meal in a thermal carry bag, and climb through your bedroom window and rip your clothes off. If a woman is lukewarm about you, she will flake on you, make excuses, or make you jump through hoops to get together.
@@ssing7113 Thank you!
My ex was honest enough to tell me I wasn't her 1st choice. She even broke up because of this. She was hung up on a guy she never even dated, but was infatuated by.
She did me a solid, now I'm with a woman who really appreciates me, and she's still unpartnered.
That will hurt her and make her regret b
@@boxoffisa I don't think she'll regret anything. That rationalization hamster is spinning at incredible speed.
@@hkszerlahdgshezraj5219 when they reach 40s or 50s they realize the bad decisions they made. Life even become tougher. If they got kids, those children will be disturbed for life like paying health bills among other things like being emotional punching bag.
@@boxoffisa I'm sure she won't have kids. Or any relationship after me for that matter. She'd been single for years before me. And she would've been unhappy with me anyway, cuz she would've though she could've gotten someone better. Which is false, but that doesn't matter.
@@hkszerlahdgshezraj5219 oh you can bet its spinning. You might find she is telling herself you were so horrible that she is glad she is single. Some people are just crazy.
I met my partner at 23. She was 21. I was poor and short but good looking. We had 2 kids. She didn't work for 9 years raising the kids. She stuck with me no job, bad , and good job. We're together 53 years. I couldn't have picked better woman
You’re old. Today things don’t work same way.
@@vg7985 I know
you didn't choose well. You chose what you had access to. You didn't have 50 women lined up to choose from. Women today have every simp in a 15 mile radius saying "pick me." Translate that to today, and your short stack is toast.
@@clv603 i slept with 10 women before I met her. I’m an Alpha
She is only confirmed a unicorn if loyal all the way up to the grave.
protip: avoid women who wear fancy brands (Hermes, Gucci, Louis Vuitton, etc.) They are advertising their high maintenance cost.
Very true
Agreed
If you're poor or not interested in models and other sh*t, of course. They doing it not for you🤷♀️
Van Cleef bracelet-wearing women are the biggest red flag. s/o Fresh Prince CEO
@@BeMyArt The advice applies across the entire socioeconomic ladder. Women who love fancy brands across any social status, are not good people in general.
I hit it off with a wonderful girl when I was overseas and we had a couple of dates. A few days later I walked out of the train station on my way home from work and there she was, dressed to the nines and waiting for me, not knowing when or if I'd even appear. That was 40 years ago and we're still very happily married.
Exactly 40 years ago 🤔
Larp or not, that is a cute fuggin story. 🤣
Boss.
@@jaredruschell2019 haha you saw the previous guy said 40 yrs too.
Great!
Married at 21 and my wife was 20. We met at a bar - I was going to be a rockstar (obviously a great prospect) so clearly it was love. I finally woke up at 33 went to tech college and had a very decent career. She had faith in me I guess, and we scraped by until I got my shi - stuff together. It wasn't always easy, but we were committed to the idea of marriage and now 40 years later we are that old couple that made it. It happens -
what tech college did you go to? what'd you study? thinking about a career change
she hasnt been faithful though, not a chance do women go 40 years with the same man.
you might not know but shes slept with other guys.
@@hindenberg507 what a dumb comment. People will say the same thing about dudes. There are just people who decide to sleep around and those that don't, either gender
@@JoeM1314 It was the 90s and I put my finger in the air -computers. Long run, I became a Network Security Engineer. Went to a local tech school that no longer exists
That's really cool that you managed to make enough money for her not to dump you for a cash grab and prizes or straight up cheat on your face. Good job, bucko! But remember to keep on trucking, a good beta's job is never done. You can never have your room clean enough or make too many figures for the bossqueen. 👌😉
I recall a (conservative) woman a few years ago telling young women that between 18-22 the most important decision they face is choosing a mate. They'll never have a better selection of available men to choose from, and that choice is probably the most important they'll ever make. She was practically burned alive by feminists, but, in my opinion, she was absolutely right.
I think this was the Asian mother of a Princeton student. She was absolutely correct; the progressive class hated her words with an insane passion.
This used to be common-knowledge that moms passed on to their daughters.
It only got raised to 18 because we're so prosperous that we can afford to waste 5 years of baby-making time, keeping girls in school so they can briefly memorize the major exports of Zambia.
I mean some can and still hold up well in looks and personality wise to their late 20s but most of them can't. social media attention and the feminisation of public and private institutions destroyed womens perception of themselves and the value they hold in the dating world. every women dreams with the white picket fence, 2 kids and a husband. I mean everyone. But they live in this disney fantasy where they think a men in a white horse is gonna come up and sweep them out their feet withou doing anything. I mean, most women cant even communicate with men without trying to show some type of entitlement or competitiveness over you unless you have a great leverage over them. not even talking about the fact most of them nowadays cant cook, dress as women, they dress like sluts with tattoos, they prostitute themselves with makeup, I mean its a game most men are not playing because theres really no return whatsoever. If you cant vent or communicate or even have a decent intelligent and intellectual conversation with a women nowadays well you better stay with your own thoughts.
Feminism isn't about women, it's about conformity and control.
@@stevenscott2136 under 18 girls are still children, and cannot consent, it's important for girls to mature into adults
At 73 y/o this is the revelation that I have had over the last six months. That none of the women I ever dated, or lived with, ever showed the slightest interest in any of the things I liked. Not one ever called and said, hey let's do that thing you like so much. I'll be glad to die alone.
That's unfortunately the price men pay when they prioritize appearance over a woman's character and having things in common.
Don’t worry, we all do ‘die alone’…🤷🏻♂️😆🤣
@@andrewmair7371
are you being rude, or just dumb?
I don't think you understand what he is saying, at all....
I’ve had a few, but I either was too young to convert them to next level or too dumb to realize it.
But not to beat myself up too much, it’s been at least 15 years since I’ve had that experience, and I don’t expect it will ever happen again, even though I’m still look like I could play in NFL at 50, women just don’t even try to learn what a man wants anymore.
Yours is a natural male response to the uncaring, aloof modern woman raised in our gynocentric society. They've been near loveless for some time now.
Growing up in Germany in the 80ies one day my mum said she didn't like American films, because they always presented the journey towards one's wedding day as the journey and the marriage as the finish line, when in real life the wedding day is the starting point of the really difficult journey that ideally ends with death or tragically ends with a divorce.
Now coming from such a mindset I think one reason the USA have so many frustrated people when it comes to relationships, it's because society promotes very unrealistic expectations for both genders. Nobody seems to prepare people for getting up at 4:30, because the toddler refuses to sleep any longer, trying to fix some breakfast, but because of your lack of sleep you end up burning it, then your partner gets up and complains about the dirty kitchen and you're trying not to yell at them, because they're taking the kid to change nappies while you're cleaning up the mess. Stories about couples who navigate through those things in a positive way, supporting each other would be so much more informative about what we really want from each other, than stories about how people fall in love. Falling in love is not difficult, transform that into long lasting, loyal love is the tricky thing. But those stories are very rarely told.
Because harmony is boring. People watch movies for escapism.
And it's 2023, only the old fashioned people still marry. It's an outdated custom.
@@CordeliaWagner but what comes after getting married is not "harmony". That's exactly the problem. People expect harmony and then they lay awake all night next to a partner who hurt them deeply and think of getting a divorce, because that can't be "real love", when in fact that's a normal part of being married.
I remember the time when my husband decided to leave his job, putting us through some financial turbulence as quite dramatic and exhausting. We nearly got divorced back then, but we managed to work things out. You could easily turn that into a film with tension, drama and a happy end. But for some reason people don't make films about these things, about fear of abandonment, about conflicts with the in-laws, about how dynamics change with the first child, about not being able to get pregnant, ... there's lots of things healthy married couple can go through that make a good story.
@@helgaioannidis9365If each person is a harmonious person and chooses a harmonious person, there is harmony as the default.
@@no_one_211 I'm a harmonious person and my husband is, too. Nevertheless you can't always agree on everything. Sometimes one hurts the other without noticing and wanting to. Sometimes the satisfaction of the needs of one partner requires the frustration of the other partner. Sometimes people have problems at work and are very stressed and impatient. They have to find agreements about how to raise their kids. Pregnancy is a period of big changes that change the dynamics within the couple.
There's many moments throughout a marriage that require compromise.
Also, people change. We can't expect our partners to stay the same, or ourselves. People go through shit and we have to be prepared for the fact that when we partner up, we are partnering up with another human., flaws and all, and the flaws and all will change over time. We don't know how to care for someone when they let us down, we don't seem to know how to forgive. Sometimes, I don't think we even like each other, or respect each other as humans.
Marriage is doomed in the West. Men shouldn't get married at all. It's not worth it.
💯% . A lot of these low value men who get the girl and are so excited to marry her will lose their money, house and kids. Congratulations low value men, you just played yourself.
A divorced lawyer put it best when he said the institution of marriage is an outdated technology
Agreed....A billion percent
@@user-bb2em1ms5y you need a messy divorce where you lose your house + child custody battle + 18 years of monthly child support. that will wake you up.
Love is a chemical emotion that fades with beauty, when you begin to be aware of a woman’s personality. Lol
A 30 year old woman explained this to me when I was 17, her advice was to marry a man I met in college who had good prospects, best advice ever. We got married when I was 21 and he was 22, that was 22 years ago and I feel so grateful for the advice!
kinda makes me feel like a race horse being speculated on. glad I got snipped lol
@@odoylerules4503lol this comment is a W, never change
@@odoylerules4503 Yes, that's how most women see most men. Either that or a work horse.
Unfortunately, now-a-days the advice women are getting from other woman is extremely conducive to healthy long term relationships that lead to successful marriages
@@odoylerules4503 Welcome to reality.
BIG part missing:
Those who get together young, before "value" has really been established, and stay together. They don't show up in the stats because they were never "on the market" for dating.
This. This is my husband and me and this is the scenario I was waiting to hear.
I don't have a partner but never considered myself on this market too 😂
Also missing- traditional Indian ‘arranged marriage’ market. Done properly, these marriages have the highest potential for success and happiness.
This is most "normal" people who don't let social media dictate their relationship choices.
Meet late in university, graduate, date and perhaps travel a couple years, propose, get a house, have a kid. Those who spend time obsessing over "SMV" and status are the exception.
@@JimzAuto Indians aren’t always happy(the stigma against divorcing even when there is abuse is severe) and the young ones don’t want an arrangement or they cheat a lot.
There is no magic answer.
What you have just described is basically a negative sum game. This "primitive" game evolved in times when survival rates were actually quite low so the relative risk of a hypergamous strategy was less.
There's also the monumental problem of determining what a "high value" partner is - it ends up largely being what a manipulative and propaganda laden media system says it is.
A much better way of looking at relationships is functional complementarity. People should form relationships to create and build something together. The ability to work as a team, agree on goals and work happily towards them is what matters. 99.9% of life is working towards goals, so it's the nature of the collaboration that matters most. Success is nice, but it's fleeting and nothing more than an optional icing on the cake. Any wise man or woman will know this. Wisdom is a rare quality.
Thankfully! I can't believe I had to scroll down this low to read this. A man can be handsome, rich and a total bastard.
Yeah people SHOULD form relationships because their characters complement each other well, but that's not what people actually do in practice. You see people all the time rejecting good partners for superficially hotter partners.
And if you end up with the on-paper-good-match partner, you might end up in a dead bedroom situation.
The difficulty with this, is that women are more influenced by social conventions, peer pressure, others opinions and the media who nudge all of the aforementioned. This is also at a faster rate of influence than men. Though yes, men are influenced too, usually by the women in their lives funnily enough.
Both Men & Women are nudged by their instincts and biochemical triggers, yet very few of either gender learn of this or seek to override such impulses.
@@lightworker2956I personally don’t see what you are explaining, although I have no doubt it occurs. Additionally, I’ve seen women outright refuse to go for someone who would be considered a 9-10 by most of not all people, because they assume something is wrong with them otherwise. lol (It’s pretty silly, in my opinion, but 🤷♀️ they can do whatever they want.) I’ve also seen individual young women date men who differ widely on the scale of attractiveness.
The differences in our observations likely just comes down to personality types and the locations we frequent or outright avoid.
I like this, so very true.
The issue won’t fix itself anytime soon. Weak men have given rise to numerous average women thinking they are 10s online. Hookup apps leave numerous average women alpha widowed. So many women genuinely believe they can get and even deserve a high value man. Reality hits them like a truck at some point in their 30s, and they all become bitter and blame men for their problems.
Let their cats eat cake.
This won't change until women become financially dependent on men again. They are simply not nearly as heterosexual as men are, and that gives them a tremendous advantage in the dating market. Men can be seen as weak because they need women physically and women as strong because they don't need men physically. Only men are heterosexual. Women are much easier seduced by another woman than even the most handsome guy.
It's horrible. The mindset spread from woman to woman, generation to generation. It spreads through social media and education. Even therapy is female dominated. The subtle hatred and disappointment in men is getting more toxic as time goes by.
As @pcap8810 said, you're basically screwed if you want kids, unless you're really lucky and you find a loyal grateful woman.
I only have one friend, who has achieved this. They live in a small town. His wife stays home and takes care of the three kids. He brings home the bacon. They've been together for over 20 years, since the age of 17. That's a unicorn relationship nowadays. Every other couple I know has constant power struggles and toxic dynamics. Choose wisely gentlemen.
I think what women offer is of interest and of value in different ways while a guy ages…especially the more a man gains a certain amount of experience!
That’s why as a man at 53, now that I am divorced after an 8 1/2 year marriage since 2017 and childless?
I am happy and even more so relieved at being aware (and experienced enough) I know what I have to invest in to attract and maintain a lay-dee doesn’t have a R.O.I as I thought it did in my youth and during my marriage…
In fact, in my view, with the amount of M.E.A.T (Money, Energy, Attention & Time) required, I wouldn’t commit to any women no matter how ideal an example a woman may be…just b/c long term women become more incentivized to use their Hypergamy based on how well I fulfill what any one wants and needs in a relationship.
In fact long term, considering the dwindling SMV of Lay-Dees…?
Time may be on men’s side but only if we refrain from committing and investing long term or in LTRs…
….sadly, men still may falter knowing this b/c we still suffer terribly for our thirst and delusions on what we think want from Lay-Dee physical intimacy and validation…even as we as men age…
My choice Dr. Taraban? Yup, you got it right…as women age they become more and more expensive to invest in and maintain, including the cost of rearing and caring for “their” children, meeting the demands and expectations by name, considering their goals (said to be “Our goals”)and wants for ideal lifestyle and as well as managing often their bad choices economically and in regard to their own health related concerns that require real attention- apart from having to deal with one’s own….
To be married is to be a man trying to often unsuccessfully meeting the standards of one’s wife- all the while what one values and respects is either secondary, tertiary or non-issue or concern when everything else and everyone else important to the wife is first, second and etc.
This is why it is my take that “all” women in degrees require that someone- someone usually a thirsty Beta-Bucks dullard is so blind to his own SMV but also even more so the SMV of his wife….as the lay-dee one invests in…
MEN are hardly knowledgeable of what we are sharing versus what women are really actually investing in the guy they marry….
My view of what the end game is for MEN investing in a woman in one of your noted “end games” for women?
Men will actually or learn to see through experience how women are really just costly “sacks” of wants, expectations and demands- that a man has to buy over to risk all he has all the while the same “sack” costs more, more and MORE…overtime!
…while anyone of US (in a committed LTR) gets less and less from what we invest in over-valued “Sack”!!!
Boys and MEN? We are quite pitiful! WE would be better off NOT investing at all in dumb, legal Ponzi-Scheme!
I think what women offer is of interest and of value in different ways while a guy ages…especially the more a man gains a certain amount of experience!
That’s why as a man at 53, now that I am divorced after an 8 1/2 year marriage since 2017 and childless?
I am happy and even more so relieved at being aware (and experienced enough) I know what I have to invest in to attract and maintain a lay-dee doesn’t have a R.O.I as I thought it did in my youth and during my marriage…
In fact, in my view, with the amount of M.E.A.T (Money, Energy, Attention & Time) required, I wouldn’t commit to any women no matter how ideal an example a woman may be…just b/c long term women become more incentivized to use their Hypergamy based on how well I fulfill what any one of THEM wants and needs in a relationship.
In fact long term, considering the dwindling SMV of Lay-Dees…?
Time may be on men’s side but only if we refrain from committing and investing long term or in LTRs…
….sadly, men still may falter in an LTR knowing this b/c many of US still suffer terribly for our thirst and delusions on what we think we want from Lay-Dees and the reality of what they are actually willing to offer US…as husbands and lovers…as in physical intimacy and external validation…even as we as men age…a whole lot of crap is on US and hardly nothing is on them socially and legally!
My choice Dr. Taraban? NOT to BUY in ANYMORE than I already have…which was costly but not so much as other men I know!
Yup, you got it right…as women age they become more and more expensive to invest in and maintain, including the cost of rearing and caring for “their” children, meeting the demands and expectations by THEM, considering their goals (said to be “Our goals”)and wants for ideal lifestyle and as well as managing often their bad choices economically and in regard to their own health related concerns that require real attention- apart from having to deal with one’s own….
In my experience, to be married is to be a man trying to often trying to unsuccessfully meet the ever changing or growing list of standards of one’s wife- all the while what one values and respects is either secondary, tertiary or non-issue or non-concern when everything else and everyone else is more important to the wife as first, second and etc. and one hardly knows how one fits in!
This is why it is my take that “all” women in degrees require that someone- someone usually a thirsty Beta-Bucks dullard who is so blind to his own SMV but also even more so the SMV of his wife….as the lay-dee one invests in…to tolerate and survive such a relationship!
MEN are hardly knowledgeable of what we are sharing versus what women are really actually willing to invest in the guy they marry long-term….when such things are subject to the duplicitous feelings of anyone of THEM!
My view of what the end game is for MEN still investing in a woman in one of your noted “end games” for women?
Men will naively invest in or accept their reality assuming the odds are on their side OR soon learn through experience how women are really just costly “sacks” of wants, expectations and demands- that a man has to buy over to risk all he has all the while the same “sack” costs more, more and MORE…overtime!
…while anyone of US (in a committed LTR) gets less and less from what we invested in an over-valued “Sack”!!!
Boys and MEN? We are quite pitiful!
WE would be better off NOT investing at all in such a dumb, legal Ponzi-Scheme!
I feel like this should be a required video to watch for women to join any dating app 🙂 Female delusions are out of control!
For young women 13-18 years old.
@@williammentink13? I think that's a little young for this convo 😅
Datings apps, like most apps, benefit by maximizing their userbase. Therefore, it is not in the interest of the dating apps to have people leave the dating app. Therefore, dating apps are designed to keep people in the dating market. Dating apps do not work.
Women that I meet in person are usually much more realistic than the women I've talked to on dating apps. Women on dating have taken hypergamy to a whole new level. Most of them will end up regretting it when they're still single at 50.
They all believe in the imaginary “there’s someone for everyone” fantasy 😂😂
So I'm a retired 85 year old aerospace engineer, a parent and grandparent. On the issue physical appearance, it's important that we maintain our physical fitness, no matter what our age may be. That means that I have to be trim, physically fit, healthy, be kind and generous towards others.
Now all this is within my control. What I eat is within my control. Exercising is within my control. Sleep is within my control. Healthy life habits are within my control. Who I choose to be good friends with is within my control.
How I take care of myself is within my control. It's all within my control is truth be told.
Now I will need help with some of these life practices. So I'll Seek That Help! And I'll Follow Their Advice!
So can you. At the end of the day, we hold the reins of our life.
I wish you well.
Well stated ! Thank you.
Physical attractiveness entirely is vain. You can be fit as a fiddle for only sex ? Even living for sex is vain and empty. You will reach an end and see God like everyone else who has come before you. What will you do then ?
i'll try an fuck every angel on every cloud in heaven ...@@christopher5585
@@christopher5585 why do you even think God exists? The only reason you're christian is that you were born in a christian family in a christian country(maybe). If you were born in an isolated African tribe you would have believed in forest spirits or whatever. How do you explain dinosaur fossils or earlier species of humans or Australopithecus? How is an all-knowing, all-loving, all-wise God compatible with children born with leukemia or the fact that he already knows everything we will ever do before we do it yet still chooses to create us and the punish/reward us? It's all non-sense and gibberish.
@@christopher5585 There was no mention of sex or your god.
In my experiences, it’s honestly the greatest time in history to be a top percent man. Women’s unwillingness to compromise with men they consider of lower value makes the game so more easier. I don’t really have a solution to give the fellas who aren’t in this demographic, but for those that are, enjoy this leverage as much as you want. Women feel like they don’t have the need to compromise, so we shouldn’t feel like we have to either. Fair is fair💯💯
Must be nice bro. Wish I chose money over meaning sometimes
Feminism told women they can do what men do. That we are equal.
Except for men, time is on our side.😊
Yes. There are men out here today hitting numbers the Ghengis Khan and his brothers never got.
A man can love a women of lower value but a woman can't because her priority is herself.
Khan keep doing your thing and punishing those women for their stupid ideology, I hope one day I’ll reach this level of success and be part of the game lol
I am a little bit older than you guys and I am finding that hypergamy never ends. I took an attractive forty- 8-year-old woman on a trip with me. you could already see the wrinkles aging spots and sagging skin. She just cover it up with makeup spending two hours in the bathroom. during the entire trip all I ended up doing was take selfies of her at different places of interest. she changed her outfit several times. She was insistent I take several shots until they were perfect. I knew exactly what was going on. These pictures were her marketing pictures to try to continue to market better and better men.
A 48 years old she was childless in her mind she was holding out to have children with the right guy. She actually thought that since she was on the pill she was conserving her eggs.. in reality she was only a couple years away from metapods and only had a 3% chance of getting pregnant but there she was, in the streets still playing the hypergamy game. Holding Out for even better offers
Attractive women have no personality, they mistake admiration from others as personality.
Princess project simps required... Marketing department. Those pics are no doubt going to social media in order to branch up
I have a relative exactly like this. She's over 50 and one of those that still believes being a strong and independent Boss-B is still going to land her a 1% man. There older she's getting the more she's doubling down on it cementing her in Option E.
So sad and so delusional.
Why did you take her on a trip with you? You’re old too. You know what age does to the body. And here you are. Criticizing the appearance of her skin. You knew she was old when you invited her. You got what you wanted out of it.
I saw a statistic somewhere that said 80 percent of women thought they could have found someone better to marry. I think their husbands can sense this.
Most women like this had mothers who planted these kinds of crazy thoughts in their heads. Their mothers were miserable, hateful feminists and now they are miserable, hateful feminists. How's that feminism working out for ya?
Interesting, since 80% of divorces are initiated by women.
That is more of a mindset, than something real. Our modern life environment constantly suggests, that there is a better "product" just around the corner. So no wonder women think so as well.
And men often do too.
yeah all women look two steps above . I met a psychologist at age 22 ; she was 21 I had thought she’d be the one but she left me because “ I had no status “in our Colombian society .I was attending Universidad del Valle a institution which is recognized in Germany ,while she was at Javeriana , a jesuit private college , later she marred a professor who aimed at an MBA in Quebec so he took her and their 2 kids , once she met a french goy with a much higher status she stayed in Canada with HER 2Kids … and her husband returned to Cali Colombia to teach atJaveriana ( no kids no wife and lotta bills to get paid to the local college for his MBA)later she confessed to me she had slept with Univalle ‘s dean of psychology in order to get her thesis done for Javeriana! !!! oh …She was pretty , short , “ well educated , well mannered and used to dress up and knowledgable on Lacan and Freud … I think she is the perfect witch / bitch I was saved from !
Familiarity breeds contempt
I’m a high performing man who actually just wants a lifetime relationship and it has been EXTREMELY hard to find that consistency and commitment from my partners. There is some sort of deep trauma in human connection these days.
Sorry to be blunt but my best guess is, that it is because you want a lifetime relationship and hence put them on a pedestal or make it about them. Remember women date up and they can't do this from a pedestal. My experience is to focus on yourself, stay high-performing, and if you choose to, allow them to follow.
@@ramonfletcher9604 Yea.. I mean I don't really know if I was putting them on a pedestal but I certainly agree the only way forward is to focus on myself and let someone follow if they want. It's clear that they need to actually value and choose to be with me as much as I have been choosing to share my life with them. I realize I was giving to people and choosing to be aligned with them even after they started to drift away and that does not work at all.
Can confirm as a man, I have never had as many options as I've had since I hit thirty. The idea of turning down a woman that I was attracted to was unthinkable to me in my teens and twenties, now it happens all the time.
You get to a certain age with enough bedroom experience, and the ego boost of turning them down is better than the conquest of clapping them cheeks. But that can only happen if you have had enough experience with women. A great feeling nonetheless.
Same, Im 40 now and Im a magnet to women, while in my early 20s and teens I was virtually invisible to them. Women like men that have mastered life, the young boy has not; aka women wait at the finish line and pick the winners. A mans value increases with age, a womans value decreases with it.
based and metooed
Western women are very arrogant and thinks she is on top of the food chain. Western women trash talks men every chance she gets. It is a waste of time to try to kiss up to western women. The divorce laws in western countries fully backs up western women. Only fools would try to marry one and when she divorces you, you men will pay dearly for it. The only way is to be with FOREIGN WOMEN. They are humble, maintenace free like Honda cars, and will make better wives. Don't say no one told you so, don't say no on warned you so!!
Bro I understand 100%. It’s almost like the more I go up in my 30s, I’m super selective and almost uninterested cos I spent my 20s and early 30s building myself
The realization that if a woman is with you at all there's a better than 50% chance she's only there because you're the best she could find at the moment and would drop you in an instant for something better really makes you want to run out and find a relationship. And still they wonder why so many men just don't bother.
It's always like that, hypergamy is real.
As the pimps say, "Hohz come going."
50% seems low. More like 99%.
Relationships are a value exchange. Once she has extracted your value, it only makes sense for her to move onto the Bigger Better Companion (BBC). Men are suckers for believing that 50 year marriages are realistic, healthy and natural.
@@gumdeoIt sure is. But I don't even think it's worth getting mad about at this point, it makes perfect sense from the biological/evolutionary standpoint. It's just that never before in human history have we had this much access to seeing all the "options" out there. Usually you'd be limited to your town or economic class. Seeing countless Chads fly their helicopters and private jets on Instagram is not something the female brain was evolved for lol. Likewise for men and supermodels.
In short, Older Successful Men dates younger women. Older single women you played yourself out. Your only companion now are cats, pills and therapy.
Don't forget the box wine and vibrators. 😁
I remember this disgusting old ran through fefail with skank bih tattoos trying to date a high valve male at her job took her 8 months to get sick of him and realize she played herself because dude was just F-ing her at her place guy never even brought her to his place she was just probably a side hoe
You are all correct 💯
I think what women offer is of interest and of value in different ways while a guy ages…especially the more a man gains a certain amount of experience!
That’s why as a man at 53, now that I am divorced after an 8 1/2 year marriage since 2017 and childless?
I am happy and even more so relieved at being aware (and experienced enough) I know what I have to invest in to attract and maintain a lay-dee doesn’t have a R.O.I as I thought it did in my youth and during my marriage…
In fact, in my view, with the amount of M.E.A.T (Money, Energy, Attention & Time) required, I wouldn’t commit to any women no matter how ideal an example a woman may be…just b/c long term women become more incentivized to use their Hypergamy based on how well I fulfill what any one of THEM wants and needs in a relationship.
In fact long term, considering the dwindling SMV of Lay-Dees…?
Time may be on men’s side but only if we refrain from committing and investing long term or in LTRs…
….sadly, men still may falter in an LTR knowing this b/c many of US still suffer terribly for our thirst and delusions on what we think we want from Lay-Dees and the reality of what they are actually willing to offer US…as husbands and lovers…as in physical intimacy and external validation…even as we as men age…a whole lot of crap is on US and hardly nothing is on them socially and legally!
My choice Dr. Taraban? NOT to BUY in ANYMORE than I already have…which was costly but not so much as other men I know!
Yup, you got it right…as women age they become more and more expensive to invest in and maintain, including the cost of rearing and caring for “their” children, meeting the demands and expectations by THEM, considering their goals (said to be “Our goals”)and wants for ideal lifestyle and as well as managing often their bad choices economically and in regard to their own health related concerns that require real attention- apart from having to deal with one’s own….
In my experience, to be married is to be a man trying to often trying to unsuccessfully meet the ever changing or growing list of standards of one’s wife- all the while what one values and respects is either secondary, tertiary or non-issue or non-concern when everything else and everyone else is more important to the wife as first, second and etc. and one hardly knows how one fits in!
This is why it is my take that “all” women in degrees require that someone- someone usually a thirsty Beta-Bucks dullard who is so blind to his own SMV but also even more so the SMV of his wife….as the lay-dee one invests in…to tolerate and survive such a relationship!
MEN are hardly knowledgeable of what we are sharing versus what women are really actually willing to invest in the guy they marry long-term….when such things are subject to the duplicitous feelings of anyone of THEM!
My view of what the end game is for MEN still investing in a woman in one of your noted “end games” for women?
Men will naively invest in or accept their reality assuming the odds are on their side OR soon learn through experience how women are really just costly “sacks” of wants, expectations and demands- that a man has to buy over to risk all he has all the while the same “sack” costs more, more and MORE…overtime!
…while anyone of US (in a committed LTR) gets less and less from what we invested in an over-valued “Sack”!!!
Boys and MEN? We are quite pitiful!
WE would be better off NOT investing at all in such a dumb, legal Ponzi-Scheme!
MEEOW!
As you said, women were gatekeepers of sex and men were gatekeepers of commitment. Traditionally, couple made commitment and got married because guys wanted steady sexual partner and women needed financial security. Now women make enough independent money, they don’t need a commitment or marriage as much as they used to. Marriage became a choice, not a necessity.
Financially speaking, you mean.
Emotionally, most women I know still want to marry.
Financially marriage is still pretty necessary...have you seen the housing market!? Childcare costs!?
Financially: partnership is still very necessary. There are grown 40 year old single women with roommates like they're 20 again. There are wmn approaching 50 straight up wondering who will care for them in 10-20 years.
No one should get tricked into thinking life will be all good alone. You need a team to win. Your single friends are not your team.
@@MrColdwilliamand there are women 50+ who have divorced from their reckless teammate who was running through the sexual marketplace like a free agent. There are women in this age range who let the younger dudes have sexual access and go about their business. Women who will never consider marrying because they fear becoming a hospice husband. Women whose husbands abandon them when they develop chronic or terminal illness.
8 million stories...
@@aspiringrootwoman24 all marriages end. Its actually the one thing I can think of that one HOPES ends in one or both parties deceased - hospice is possible in that. There's also the possibility of any partner being bad, this is part of choosing carefully and understanding character. But acting like "things can go bad so I won't do it" is as dumb as saying "I could get sick from food so I will never eat". The problems that come from not eating (or not partnering with someone) is WAY WORSE in the long run than doing it. It's choosing the bad ending off top -- starving to prevent experiencing food illness is as asinine as running head first into loneliness to prevent experiencing a bad marriage/partnership.
I'm so glad I found your channel, as a fellow mental health practitioner and a woman who's deeply invested in the topic of the Redpill. This knowledge has helped me immensely in my own life, and I'm so grateful it helped me find a great partner at my age rather than struggling to find one later.
For women it's about KEEPING one. Women now a days can't hold on to a relationship to save their lives. Any woman can find a man, men are like socks, you can exchange one every day but finding a great man of value that you can keep? that's a diff story
By listening to this channel, You betrayed your sisterhood of progressive liberal young women. Shame on you! jk lol
@@laturista1000, 🤣
even i want a long term stable relationship with a woman, changed myself for good, started learning what is happening around and started taking better decisions in life. Thank you, God bless.
Gina´s are not allowed in this cult. @@gina2641
The answer is simple, most women have a fear of rejection, and are not used to putting themselves out there... Men, have no choice, but to approach women in some form or fashion... Rejection to a man, is like a no response to a sales pitch. You have to swing in order to hit... 'nuff said.
Women go after what they desire, don't be fooled
As a man, I am immune to rejection. In fact, I often joke with my buddies about my best rejections of the week. NEXT....
Yep. We learn to fail with this stuff early on in life and you just pick yourself up and take another swing until you crack one outta the park.
Wrong. Women don't approach because they want to maintain leverage. They don't want to seem desperate. They want to be viewed and treated as the prize.
@@kittitaskidbro i want to get to that level 😂
I neither have nor want a designer bag. None of my female friends, colleagues, or patients have them either.
And I have a different sense of what "endgame" means.
My husband died suddenly and very unexpectedly a few months ago. We were together nearly 44 years. I don't know whether you would have considered him "high value," but I certainly did.
So the "endgame" for me-- insofar as this is the end, as I am likely to live quite a while yet-- is not a matter of what sort of marriage I have, but what sort of widowhood. A very different perspective.
I think it's worth mentioning that no matter what sort of partnership a woman finds herself in, since women tend to live longer than men, unless she is with a much younger man the "endgame" is likely to be living alone. We need to plan for that contingency.
so sorry for your loss
Sorry for your loss. Enjoy life non-the-less, your time on this sorrowful earth is short but meaningful.
This is the one.
They never talk about the women that did everything right like it’s women’s fault for being human and aging 😂also men older than you never stop hitting on you so how do options lower they just increase?
Grateful for your comment. 🙏 I was thinking similarly, even though I am nowhere near your life experience. Friendship network will be the endgame, as my friends and me aim to land in the same elderly house later on, hopefully
A) Lesbianism (reject men altogether)
B) Single motherhood (men in and out)
C) Trad Wife
D) Money Girl (escorts, entertainers, trophy wife)
E) Career Woman (Married to job)
Very well put, congrats.
You love her
But she loves him
And he loves somebody else
You just can't win
And so it goes
Till the day you die
This thing they call love
It's gonna make you cry
Love stinks! 😂 - Wedding Singer.
I've been thru diamonds.....I've been thru minks.....I've been thru it all!!!!!
That's been my experience.
@@twinkledust4642 The J. Geils Band
Love stinks
A women I know fell into this trap, she used to be VERY attractive but like most, wasted her youth been a 304, chasing guys with a million options and now she is in her 40s, no man, no kids and she really wants both but is too late now. She simply priced herself out of the market. She still thinks she got it, I told her “sorry hun but men are chasing 20 year old women” 😅😮, oh boy she didn’t like that
Even if not 40 year old women....they want women who can give them kids and aren't on anrush timeline. I'm 44 and would love to date a 30 year old woman. But even near 50 year old women think they too good for me. So I'm focused on self improvement
Do her a favor and show her this video. She might be able to lower her value and secure a low value man. At least it would give her a chance of finding some kind of relationship before her odds actually hit 0%
Where all the good men gone?
@@fausto412dude we’re close in age and I have an 18yr old. You can do it bro. Just build up and be confident.
Lol, few men chasing 20 year olds will ever get them. They may get laid at times, but no 20 yo with options is going to have his child.
As a data analyst, I appreciate this thorough analysis. What I have noticed is that even older women (40+) have unrealistic partner expectations. Social media, Netflix and unrealistic societal norms have seriously skewed older women’s expectations and standards. I’ve basically punched out, and in so doing am finding peace of mind that I never thought that I would achieve.
happens that women can control their reproductive choices and then having a partner is a choice and not an obligation to survive. Game theory cannot explain relationships other probably than the dynamics of a night at the bar. There are no objectively high value anything other than the very extremes, people cannot make rational decisions about their economy or their health, much les when feelings, values, hormones, etc are involved.
It's true. Last year I literally watched a 40 year old woman say that she was raising her standards and ONLY accepting the best because she got dumped by a below-average man. She was barely average for her age, below average overall. 40 year old women might be MORE delusional than younger women
Yup, even my dumbass aunt that is 50+ years old, super fat, very sick (bone narrowing, heart aches...etc), very low paying job that can't even pay her own rent and medicine, was still very pretentious and did not want to marry the simp that was in love with her since they were kids living on the same street. But after lots of pressure from family members she gave in but was expecting him to buy her expensive stuff and treated him disrepesctfully making him take on her family name among other things. That's because she was married to a chad that cheated on her non stop and treated her like shit with lots of yelling and threats. That's what she believes is a real man, not someone that genuinely cares for her, has his own apartment.
Totally agree. I have finally found some peace of mind since I’ve realised that truth.
@@tdaye6978your comment is the exact reason women over 40 stay single. You go with the "valuable" 20 yr old tart who's gonna leave you and take more than half of what you have all because pussy was seen as "valuable" 😂 Smart. You get exactly what you deserve
They go lgbt, or fill their homes with pets, or both.
(PIN IT PLEASE)
Goal: Women getting a commitment from a top tier man (top 10%).
Question: Of the five possible outcomes, which is most likely to happen:
7:40 - A. Women keep price tag high & beat out competition.
7:49 - B. Women lower their price tag and SUCCESSFULLY beat out competition.
7:58 - C. Women keep price high, FAIL to beat competition and SETTLE FOR LESS.
8:07 - D. Women lower their price tag, STILL FAIL and still SETTLE FOR LESS.
8:16 - E. Women neither secure nor settle and, BY CHOICE, END UP W/ CATS & BOX WINE.
Doc, my first answer is C. My second guess would be E.
And for women, that “practical” handbag not only gets the same job done but it also isn’t trying to be stolen from you.
Take it for what its worth…
👏👍
If it is stolen, you just go buy another one.
At this rate, I'm in the D category. But due to the age gap between my bf and I, I'm still going to end up at E. He's gonna die before me, assuming we live out our years.
What does "price" mean in this situation?
@@yuriy5376, Юрий translates to Yuri.
Dating for women is like eating out, the longer they wait to choose, the more limited options. Yes, they can still land a meal at 3AM but it'll be out of a gas station and not a 5 star restaurant.
Nice analogy
@@issac1135 thanks
If she follows God's plan...that dynamic changes. It goes in the same direction as men but with alot of variables.
😂😂
I married down but allowed time to balance things out. When I met my husband I was earning twice as much as him and was the more educated. I chose to ignore all that as I am old fashioned. I married him, got pregnant and quit working outside the home. 18 years later my husband is earning three times what I was when we met and we live comfortably on one income while I stay home to homeschool. Life is great when you ignore feminism and live according to the old ways. Oh, and I don't own a designer handbag. I don't own designer anything. I don't even own a smart watch or a brand name mobile phone. I don't even have my own car or brand name clothes. I haven't even purchased any clothes for myself (besides under garments) for over five years now. All my other fit, are in my size, my colouring and body type why would I need to buy more?? Most of my clothes are from Aldi. I never was materialistic. We have no debts besides our mortgage which is almost payed off.
You think you married down
You probably didn’t
You are an amazing woman, wife and mother.
How old are you if you don’t mind me asking.
Ditto… I did the same!❤
Gratitude, self-sacrifice and overcoming materialism will make you happier than most people addicted to social media flexing.
Relationships are described here as very transactional and I've come across this a lot from other Americans. Do any yanks ever fall in love anymore? Fall for the wrong person for the right reasons? I'm thinking of Dan Aykroyd in Trading Places, who he was supposed to end up with vs who he did end up with.
As a guy in his 40’s actively dating, I’ve been astounded by the lack of urgency among single women in their 40’s.
Because how you have to put in all that effort. Pay for things
She has 40 numbers in her contacts for hookups and 1,000’s who would bang her that night if she cared
They got life on east mode for instant satisfaction that has hooked them to a drug like relationship. That’s like telling an addict to quit his drugs and get a job and be a normal member of society. Ain’t happening man
I suspect it's because women in their 40s still have access to sex practically anytime and anywhere, but they (women) don't and never had to understand the rules of the relationship marketplace until they hit the wall. They learned and still believe that if they provide access to sex, they have marriage. Plus by 40, they've been through all the emotional damage in life and want to "get it right" next time. So they're looking for something even more perfect and unattainable than they were in their 20s.
Urgency was a thing that happened when women only had local bars and social clubs to date and they actively saw quality men diminish in their surroundings. Today there are millions of single men ready to proposition her whenever she desires. I hate using the term "modern women" as if there's a difference between today's women and women of yesteryear, but the reality is that the internet has enabled women to always connect with when to her liking, as all women are hypergamous (regardless of her age) she will go for the same top in her 40's as she did in her 20's and even teens.
@@ashfordj81Yeah, whenever I hear a man aged 18-25 say "women's standards lower with age" they completely miss the point. Logically the only women left on the market by this age are those that priced themselves out of long term relationships, thus have even higher standards. Meanwhile older men dating younger women always say "young women are so simple, they're so easily satisfied", if older women were easier you'd see the opposite effect, you'd see young men going for older women en masse, but "cougars" are rare and most women don't want younger men, meanwhile younger women are more open to dating older men than older women are to dating younger men.
Becos their favourite celebrity and influencers r still successfully having babies in their 40s n 50s, so y wud they be worried?
This is so true. I started dating my husband at 18 and we are still together and happy (I am 25 now). Meanwhile most of my female friends over 27 find it so difficult to find a partner or to have a relationship longer than a year.
They wasted their best years.
If I may offer one bit of advice...
Stop hanging out with your single friends.
Women get jealous as they get older. They WILL start to poison your mind very slowly over time. They'll eventually try to convince you that you could do better.
Say what you want now, but one day your husband will be at a low point. He'll need you more than ever. And the temptation to abandon him at that moment will seem overwhelming.
I've seen too many decent women fall prey to peer pressure and start believing the lies.
Single women make married women single.
If you stick with, and appreciate the man who you gave yourself to in your prime, you will never grow old in his eyes. This I can assure you.
In all honesty, I am happy for you, but you do have to admit that you lucked out by finding a man that you still like at 25 when you were 18.
@@nico3641
She'll have five different husbands in her life. They'll just happen to all be the same man.
That's the trick. You have to go in knowing that you will both change and accept that you'll have to stick it out and learn to love and accept the new person. It's not easy! But the rewards can be incalculable.
Love isn't a feeling. It's a choice. You have to wake up every single day and make the decision to love the other person. Feelings alone aren't enough.
@@nico3641 why does it have to be luck? cant she just be good at decision making? When, exactly, do people get credit for their own hard work and smart moves? Or is everyone doing well, just "lucky?"
I'm 41, I don't like younger girls because of their immaturity but i'm attracted to them visually. What a weird place to be in. I'm attracted mentally to older women but visually i'm not. What's the solution?
27 seems to be the sweetspot. Younger and they have nothing useful to say ,older than 33 and they are shall we say hardened by life.
A younger woman is a better bet for plenty of reasons, if you’re thinking about a woman for a life, that’s a no brainer.
Androids and artificial wombs.
A younger woman can grow when cared for. An older woman has a hard time getting out of the ruts they've dug for themselves. Just make sure that the care for the younger woman comes before the commitment or she'll pump and dump you.
Perhaps it's your fear of being judged thats swaying your preferences
Do not be afraid,comrade for a younger woman of 20,21,25 are all adults and are capable of making their decisions
If you want them,go for them
This isn't reddit,you shan't be shamed for something as natural as having a marriage with a younger woman
My husband and I have been married for 44 years. When we got married my husband owned just two suitcases with a few clothes. We met at church, and got married during the big recession, so steady work was not a luxury that we were able to enjoy. We have three kids and 10 grandkids. My husband is close to retirement now. He has been a true and loyal husband and father. Had I judged him as an unworthy partner because of his lack of money, or the fact that he couldn’t hold on to a job during our first few years of marriage, I would have missed out on a wonderful relationship along with our beautiful family. BTW, he was willing to marry me in spite of a previous marriage that gave us our first daughter. We are not the beautiful people on the outside that we were back at the beginning, but our time together has produced many more important qualities than just being attractive and employed.
You can't compare your situation to that of the younger men and women today
Most girls today will never!
If he is not instagrammable and the lifestyle he can provide is not instagrammable then he is "icky" and a "No".
Two suitcases of clothes meant there wasn't a great investment in clothing that the new bride wanted to replace?
Just like the two first two people respoding to you have said, we have lived during (at least) the last 15 years or so in a completely different world than ever before, which is mostly due to technological inventions like social media and smartphones. This is for a very lengthy discussion, but there is a reason why we have never felt this disconnected, lonely, depressed, lost, lacking drive, inner peace, direction, purpose and fulfillment in life, social skills, actual community, not to mention the relationship between men and women constantly getting worse and more distant. According to every statistic I have come across, things are constantly getting worse...
How great❤so lovely
Anytime I share content such as this with my sisters or my female friends it's not well received. They are resistant to this reality.
The five stages of grief are : denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
@@mbg9650 there it is. That's true.
@@mbg9650😂😂😂. Right
First mistake. You have women friends. .
Women aren’t your friends. Don’t be their emotional tampon. Tell them to get their own damn man and solve their trauma. Issues. Outbursts. Needs. Wants and wishes.
Reality for them is filtered through their emotions; if it doesn't feel good it cant be true
Very true. I was very shy in my teens and most of my 20's. By the time I hit my my early 30's I had a relatively high paying job, lots more confidence, and all of a sudden lots more dating options. Note to the young incels who are frustrated that they can't get a lady. Time is on your side. Spend the next 10 years improving yourself and building a career. You will be surprised at 30 by the number of women who want you.
While true, the problem is that a lot of 30-year-old men are just barely starting to acquire dating experience, while the women their same age or even younger have had a lot, lot more "experience." Some men reach their 30s having improved themselves significantly, motivated by the hope to be a more enticing partner choice for women so that they (the men) can then finally have some significant dating experience. We see a ton of women complaining about men, especially from women in their 30s and 40s. The complaints are usually that the men are "not committing", "immature", and "playing games" (or in other words "Men ain't s**t"). The thing is that most of these women in their 30s and 40s getting frustrated with men are either pursuing the "top 10%" of men who have way too many options and will likely never settle with anyone, or these women are "pursuing" (or perhaps you can call it "settling for" even though it really shouldn't be seen that way) a man that is close to their age and RMV, but who has had very little dating experience (and is totally justified in wanting to acquire more dating experience before committing).
Modern trends are leaving most 30-something-year-old men with very little dating experience, and a very small portion of 30-something-year-old men with a ton of dating experience. If a 30-something-year-old woman pursues a 30-something-year-old man with a ton of dating experience, she is extremely unlikely to secure commitment from that guy. (Those guys rarely commit to any women and if they do commit, it is to a woman in the "top 5%" [and most 30-something-year-old women do not even really know a "top 5%" woman, because a huge majority of the "top 5%" women are in a younger age bracket.) If the 30-something-year-old woman pursues (or "settles for" - even though it really shouldn't be perceived as settles) one of the many 30-something-year-old men with very little dating experience, it would be very unfair for her to expect that man to commit to her unless she too has had very little dating experience, which is unlikely.
problem is i don't want to build a career, the only way for me to be successful is to stop fighting society. and I've only recently given up. giving up means i accept that i will step on people and that is how the world works, i will lie casually as everyone else does and play the game and stop trying to shit in everyone's cheerios, or say things that make them uncomfortable. i'll stop solving the problems i want for the sake of my own happiness, because i've encountered a brick wall and that is society itself, one i don't know if i can surmount in my lifetime.
The issue is that if you're an average 30-something guy (not a guy with a high-paying job like you), then yes you can find a woman, but she's probably a single mom or an alpha widow or bitter or obese or a fervent feminist or crazy. And likely she's not actually going to make your life better overall. The quality of those women who grew up with social media and internet dating is very low (older guys don't realize this), and the high-quality women who do exist don't go for average guys.
you fail to explain why men would want these obnoxious financial predators then who didn't want them when they had nothing...
Because women are idiots that wouldn't know a good mate if it hit them in the head. They base their choices off of feelings and emotions and based on popularity. If women see that other women want you, they will want you. If women see you are alone or that other women dont want you, then they too wont want you.
Women are not logical creatures. They base their decision off of feelings and following the herd .
@@melc4308
As a 65 year old man who has been happily married for 38 years I am fascinated by the current mating "marketplace". It's sad that there are so many "losers" and the forecast is for the % to increase.
yeah most of my friend group are the 'losers' in this scenario, most of them male and never been laid and never will. I just tell myself its evolution, I don't feel bad for the fish I ate or the wood I burn. But I sure as hell don't want to be one of them haha.
@@dontcallthemliberals3316 What I don't understand is the attitude of resignation of many of these guys. Even if you're not tall and handsome, you CAN get a girlfriend, you just have to work harder. Become physically fit, dress well, and most important of all advance in a career and you'll find there are plenty of woman who want to be with you. They may not be supermodel types, but they are still beautiful. And that beats playing video games all day in Mom's basement, or sh¡tposting anti-women gibberish on some "men going their own way'' website, right?
@@macgp44 That won't change the fact that women have set expectations to be too high for most men and will feel like they are settling making the relationship not worth it in the long run due to the feeling of not getting their value worth. I agree with guys at least trying to improve their life but in nature, not all male species get to procreate which is perfectly normal.
@@macgp44 Confirmed bachelor here.Never gave the bimbos the time of day.Just LOVE keeping my freedom, money and piece of mind!😀😄😁🤣😉😛
@@macgp44 Catering to women?? I wouldn't lift a peanut, never mind weights, to impress bimbos!!Too funny!😀🤣😅🙃😋
I’m a 34 year old married mother of 3 - been with my husband for 16 years! I met him as an 18 year old virgin working as a waitress in a cocktail bar (I know, the song!) and he was 28 and had his own business up and running.
I have been a stay at home Mum for 7 years. I always cooked, always cleaned, entirely - even before our children. We are very traditional. I am scoffed at by other women for this but our marriage is very happy and we enjoy a very comfortable lifestyle as my husband is a great father, great provider - and corny as it sounds, my best friend. It was a meeting of minds and, personally, I don’t think it harmed that I was 18!!!
Great channel - some very interesting ideas! Refreshing x
This is my dream
I'm so glad you became a SAHM, kudos to you and your husband for enabling this!
How it should be! 👏🏻
There is so much weird transparent fanfic going on in this video's comments
Win win for you and husband
I don't see how anything would change much if women were to do the asking. The 1% men will always be able to get all the sex that they want without commitment
I think you missed a scenario when a woman gets married, has kid(s) and then the relationship falls apart and the woman becomes a single mom. I don't know about the other countries, but it's frighteningly often in Russia. I know about way too many cases of such scenario. Probably, the most infuriating one to me was when I gathered some of the groupmates from university and then one of the guys confessed, that he got 2 children and then divorced. In my head it was: "Are you dumb? If you committed to relationship so deeply, why did you do it?! It's unfair to kids, to woman and to yourself"
>
In the United States, it's usually the woman with two children who files for divorce.
Outcome of settling for lower valued men?
@@SeattlePioneer Filing for divorce does not equalt she originally wanted out of the relationship. Women file for divorce if she does not want to put up with him having affairs, drinking, being mean, having addictions, ... Or they both manage to bring out the worst in the partner and she ends the circus.
@@franziskani "Filing for divorce does not equal she originally wanted out of the relationship."
It often does.
They 'do it to themselves', because they believe the lie. The lie about everlasting, passionate, romantic, love. 99% of the time it doesn't work that way. But people delude themselves, thinking, 'Oh, it won't happen to ME!'. With the first child, her husband is now playing second fiddle to those kids for the rest of his life. How many married men are still having hot, spontaneous sex as much as they want to? Very, very few. Because the wife is now in charge of his sex life; he no longer has any other option other than his five fingers.
Marriage is a dead end for a man. Oh, he THINKS that the hot sex will last forever, but that dies after a couple of years.
Whats weird is that for the VAST majority of men, we aren't with our first choice, either. You have to be a total fool to think that you can truly get with a 10/10. Maybe like rock stars and pro ball players. But also, how childish and spiteful to resent your wife / long term girlfriend because she's not a 10/10.
2 important codicils:
1. Irrespective of where you are in the totem pole, she's still always going to be looking for "better" anyway, so just don't wife it.
2. If you are top 1% 5% (whatever), she's STILL only looking for the FANTASY of the top 1% man. Not the reality. HER fantasy. Ie theres a very good chance she'll want to divorce you anyway and just retain the resource element of your status. Women petition to divorce high value men every day of the week. So ONCE AGAIN, just don't wife it.
I think Tom Brady is the ultimate example of no matter high value of a man you are, a woman will always be looking for more.
Men do the same thing.
Upvoted for the use of codicil. Them's a 1% word ;p
Straight up!
@@ballen0360 This is why it's all a bit academic really. However it's laid out by UA-cam "experts" and whichever novel analogies are employed to illustrate a point.
Nature's gonna nature. I don't have an issue with it anymore. I accept women are the way they are just as I accept men are the way we are.
Tom Brady probably is the exemplar, as you say.
I simply take the view don't be dumb enough to give them marriage. Give them the freedom of their hypergamy by denying any form of commitment that comes with legal penalties. And if you are hell bent on achieving HVM status (as if thats any kind of panacea-it isn't), do it solely for your own edification. That much is vital because it's only going to make you even more of a mark.
I think the sad thing about this video (and current outlook on relationships in general) is that it only focuses on a transactional relationship. Value/worth of a partner doesn’t pertain to money, looks, or possessions or what you will receive from the other person… there’s an immeasurable value to the quality of a person, the emotional intelligence and choice to care for your person, that far outweighs an offer of just financial security or a pretty face. Because women can now better support themselves financially, requirements are beginning to shift. If you choose to look at partners as a commodity, then you will grow tired of them; it’s inevitable.
you don't seem to grasp the transactional nature of the relationship between men and women. you think your ancestors cared about personality for survival?
@@andro.5678 only that relationships do not function the way that there are presented here, other than in a bar where most people are drunk. People do not get and stay together due to a cost benefits assessment of the presumed present value, the value is not objective at all and it is distorted by feelings. A man who looked high value when I was 17, it looks like an idiot when I am 27. Then when you marry, you know your partners' every single weakness you do not think in terms of higher lower value. Finally, most women have several relationships before marriage, and m,ay settle down when they feel they found "the one" just the opposite of what is described here.
So as a woman would you date a broke guy then? What about a blue collar guy? Wouldn't a lawyer be a better pick? Be honest. How attracted would you be if the guy looked the same in all 3 scenarios and had the same EQ?
@@timgibney5590 I would date them if they had a passion and pursue a worthwhile goal, not self centered (e.g., NGO). I would not date a multimillionaire NBA player, rapper, real state agent, crypto brother, podcaster, no one with red pill language or attitudes, promiscuous with doble standards or a man more than 2 years older than me. BTW my husband retires this year and we will live from my salary and health insurance until it is time to use our savings.
He always omits this important aspect of relationships and only focuses on looks and finances.
With how many games women play, how little effort they put into forming romantic relationships, and how little they usually provide in relationships, I feel little to no sympathy for them ending up alone or with a guy far below their ideal.
You sound hurt.
@@tinachristine4573 - disappointed
@@tinachristine4573 He's only telling the truth, Mrs. Armchair Psychologist.
They ultimately still win either way. Even with a low value guy, on divorce they will get the money, house and kids. So they still win. The low value guy is left with nothing, while she walks into Chad's arms with the money, house and kids.
@@marriagecausesdivorce7540chad’s arms…for the night. So you were right up until assuming she will keep him, which is what she would prefer over getting used for the night.
why do women not initiate? that's a simple one to answer and when I tell you it will be obvious. women want men to initiate because it puts them in a position of power. if a man is interested and attracted to a woman before she "decides" if she is interested back, she can rank her preferences by who provisions more but also the one that she loves less or not as much. This keeps her in control of the relationship. The person who loves least controls the relationship. By making the man state his intentions, she chooses the one who provides what she wants in a man without requiring the level of commitment and love that he has already often demonstrated by pursuing her. it's a power play. And you might think that a man she absolutely falls in love with would be her first choice for a relationship but that would be a short term choice. She still has to determine if she can keep such a man and how far she is willing to sacrifice to get him. at that point, she has lost the position of power.
I’m a woman. Trained myself to not want the man that everyone else wants. Content with a “regular” man since I’m a “regular” woman.
😂😂😂 LOL imagine having to train yourself not to eat caviar. You must teach the rest.
Good for tou Lady 👍🏻
You are a "regular woman" and he is a "regular man" to the world. To each other you are the one. We need to remember that all these categorisations and ratings are not meant to bunch up people as products and even the term "sexual marketplace" and "high and low values" are only meant as metaphors to enable us speak of these issues. If we go by these metaphors, then it is always best to chose a spouse that is roughly matching your own value at least speaking of external appearance and then if possible of the same broad socio-economic bracket, catering of course for the fact that in very higher echelons you find mostly men, hence men will always be expected to be earning substantially more (ideally more than 150% of what their women earn). In plain metaphoric terms, if you as a woman you are a 5 you better look men between 4,5 and 5,5 - these are the ones closest to your level and these are precisely the men that are more prone to propose to you and not see you as merely a few nights stand.
Both men and women fail often in this. Women mistake sexual interest with romantic interest which for men is not at all the case. A woman that is 5/10 may very easily lure a 7, even an 8 for one or two nights of sex but that is the best she can get out of him - the best scenario is that she becomes his booty call that he uses when he passes a dry spell period. In fact men who are 8s have a list of 5s-6s which they rotate to keep them entertained but when they start thinking of marriage they will only consider 7s and 8s not their "f-buddies". Then those wealthy men who are a 5/10 in appearance and with average game skills mistake the monetary interest of sexy women in them as genuine interest thus falling prey to their predatory patters. They may marry them but too soon they will find out their wives are not interested in them, just in the lifestyle and thus their marriage ends up becoming miserable, suffering cheating and humiliation let alone the divorce rape they undergo in courts.
You may find hyper-wealthy men such as Zuckerberg who married their college sweetheart. He was a 5, she was a 5 or 4,5, both very average the "regular man and regular woman". With his money and wealth he could have married just any hot woman he wanted, but he stuck with the woman that picked him back when he was just a random young student. And good thing he did, he risks not seeing her filing for divorce or cheating unless she catches him doing so in the first place.
Congrats for achieving just basic adult common sense.😂. Yeah average woman is a 4, not a 10. Not everyone can be a one in a million person
@@keylanoslokj1806 how about some humility and understanding? How about actually appreciating when someone does the right thing instead of belitlleing? I'm sure you're flawless, but not everyone is
My problem with the perceived SMV that people have is that it is based mostly on superficial attributes. Browsing a dating app is all about the superficial. Just because a girl is young and pretty does not mean she will be a good wife. Just because a man is tall and handsome does not mean he will commit to marriage or be a good husband. If you get to know someone in real life, you may discover a diamond in the rough. Character matters in the long run. We all age. Dating apps are cancer.
That superficiality IS the problem now! I tended to date guys "lower" on the scale when we met in person; and you're right because I could experience his kindness, humor, generosity and a lot of other intangibles that just can't come across on an app
You just countered your own point. “Lower”… right
Your clue is in the name: Sexual Market Value! Its not RMV (relationship market value) its not MVM (Marriage Market Value) and it sure as hell is not HMV (Happiness Market Value). if you want to discuss things that people are not discussing, you need to stop confusing the issue, and conflating a greater meaning to the SMV!
Correct
Remember guys:
Virtually all men who've been divorced, thought for certain at one point that they'd found, "the one".
Many people focus on women's biological clock, or, fertility window. It seems to me that men have a window too, but it looks like this: By the time a man reaches 30 he is more likely in charge of his libido, rather than the other way 'round. His rational faculties cause him to assess the situation in terms of cost/benefit vs risk of being destroyed by the situation.
If a woman cannot lock a man down within that 10 year window, her quest to acquire a commitment becomes much more difficult. In youth, a man can be more easily captured by the simple offer of physical gratification. After 30 women keep trying to secure commitment by offering more of the only relationship skill they know. Men accept the offers but there are rarely any reciprocal commitments. Once men learn to enjoy living alone, with all the risks involved and virtually no benefits (apart from the physical), men have no incentive to change their status quo.
Best Comment
Women are fertile until menopause. Get some education, you come across as ....
exactly
The young woman offered her honour;
He honoured her offer;
So all night long it was on her and of her🤔
You didn’t cover all possible outcomes at 7:40… women can take turns having relationships with the top men. It’s not uncommon for guys to have a second or even third family.
Those percentage divisions within the 5 groups really speak to how Western women overvalue & overestimate their ever-declining worth (on a mass scale).
The delusion is real because of all the SIMP's in the DM's, and because Chad, Tyrone and Chadrone are smashing them on their girls trips.
and he's being RREEEAAALLLYYY charitable on the distribution of group 5.. The typical stats reported are its gonna be 51% of all women over 30 by 2030 are single and childless. How many of them do you think will actually find a guy?
Orion is the ‘Red Pill Jordan Peterson’. Helpful videos that don’t succumb to the manoswamp toxicity.
strange comparison since half of what Peterson says is emotional ranting, scapegoating people he disagrees with (i.e. becoming what he hates), or talking about topics he has no grasp of. They are both good psychologists who seem to care about society, but their style is very different.
Dr Taraban just made a 3.5 hour appearance on the Fresh and Fit podcast. It was a great interview.
The toxicity and angrily dunking on hos is what I'm here for.
Don’t insult Orion in that manner.
Jordan when it comes to dating is really still on women’s side.. he says men need to grow up and women have a right to their hypergamy. Yea he’s flamed tinder and hookups but brevet really pointed the finger and womens fault. He just says we have a problem here. But in dating he points the finger at men saying “do better”
Where Orion approach is hears the facts ladies and gentleman. What do you want to do with this.
The way it’s supposed to work is that women marry a man early, before he got into his prime. It’s an investment. She chooses wisely, ensures she doesn’t violate the agreement by sleeping with other men, or failing to support the husband. In return the husband succeeds in his career and ensures that the woman is protected and cared for. Both parties fill their role. The roles are different…but equal in importance. In return the woman got the ability to divorce for half and alimony if the man was unfaithful or just a bad guy, because it’s expected she can’t do that again with another man.
Now There’s no investment, no support, no chastity.
Well said!
Very well summed up.
💯
Violating agreements, it is womens' prerogative to change..... etc
You know the meme cop-out
And how a person in their 18 supposed to be wise? I remember myself - I was stupid. Almost all of us are.
His initial presumption is flawed. Sex with each woman compared to a manufactured product a designer handbag which will be exactly the same. This is what degradation sounds like. a small-minded materialistic person degrades an experience that is far more impactful, unique and valuable. I wonder if he’s actually ever experienced.
The problem for women is that they've internalized a sense of high value to the point of delusion from their experiences in their 20s, and "feel" they still have that value in their 30s and 40s, but they no longer do. Only those women that realize eventually that men are the prize, and they need to work to earn his love, respect and attention, will find a mate who will commit to them. I don't date women who think the men are lucky to get their time on a date (that kind of girl ends up alone long term).
"Men are the prize." 🤣😂😆🙄
When did men become the prize😂
@@Dee14444When most of them started to believe they are among the top 10 percent, when in fact they are just delusional...
@@Lilith-9223 The whole thing is delusional. He starts by admitting women are killing it in the workplace more than men, and never once stops to consider that men themselves have blighted their own prospects by falling behind.
It's NOT that women are all looking for rich men, but they sure as hell expect someone who has their shit together. Fewer men are in that category now.
I guess when people realized most men are easier to get along with/ less drama than women, both men and women seem more masculine as they age. So they both lose their looks and style , women more so, but both do, one is just less drama ( as a generalization) @@Dee14444
7:00 - “The men who have what women want, are the least likely to give it to them.”
“From their perspective (men), the women’s demands are too expensive and they only become MORE expensive as a function of time.”
Mystery #1: when will women realize that men are attracted to youth and fertility and not degrees or salary? #2: why are there less than 200M subscribers. Your work is genius.
The channel has rapid growth. It'll hit a million subs in no time.
#1 Of course they know.
They've been hit on since they were a teenager, penniless & degreeless.
It's just a shaming/coping/manipulation tactic to persuade the men who they want to commit to them, to pay a high price for their less valuable self.
They want what they want. And as they can't make themselves younger and more fertile, they have to change the preferences of the male buyer
Women know that men are attracted to youth, beauty and fertility, but we have to prioritise education and job to survive and be able to provide for our children. We can't just sit and look pretty and expect a man will come and pay our bills
Simple projection, my friend, simple projection: "I know what I value in a partner, so they must value the same in me." Not a terriblly sophisticated process, but an incredibly powerful one.
@@maijensen3317 sounds like a strawman argument. Most women are not even looking seriously for a relationship while getting a degree.
All comments about "i married 20 years ago" should be deleted - it's useless and stupid.
Great video as always! Solid advice. Could you make a male version of this? What endgame looks like for the men these days? (Taking into account our statistics as well as the passport bro thing.)
I have some ideas. But I'd like to know what it would be for men
1. Be succesfull and do whatever you want
2. Be average or below average and die alone beating your own meat
For the smart man with value: solitude; not to be confused with loneliness is a win. You get to enjoy the fruits of your labor without the risk of losing them in family court while enjoying the abundance of options from the opposite sex. As long as you don't compromise. I.e. tie the knot. And if you worry about being taken care on your elderly year, you don't have to as long as you protect your networth from western family courts.
End game for men is: 1. unhappy marriage, or 2. divorce and losing the money, house and kids.
The problem is most divorces come from that 53% because those women eventually decide the men they settled for are inadequate. And since her evaluation is based on an ideal there is little the men can do about it.
divorce stats are massively inflated, most of the %s are made up of a minority of psychos with 3 ex wives/husbands. This is mainstream knowledge now dude keep up.
women divorce for the financial incentives
only seeing one reply youtueb, why ? something triggered the narrative ??
@@DanTheManIOMYup! Another snow flake got her feelings hurt!
Most men are inadequate... you act like children....for example blaming your wives when you cant find your own good damn shirt!
Women become kinda desperate at 30... seen it so often. But at 35 and over it is insane how desperate they are at that age wishing they would have said yes to some good duded that would have taken her serious, oh well, i cant feel bad for these women because i was one of those guys hhahahha BYEEEEEEE
It's true. They do become desperate at about 30 to 35.
My husband is and always was highly attractive to other women. But he chose me, I am good looking but not as much as he is. When we fell in love I was even slightly overweight and I am three years older. But he fell in love with my personality. And it was a good thing: Since 20 years we are very happy together and best friends. I love him so much he is my soulmate, my baby and the only man I fancy in bed..And most important: The only person I trust completely. Our secret: Commitment and absolute honesty. I think those two factors lack in most relationships nowadays, but they are essentail.
Thanks for video, well done. Although I found this analysis interesting, I assume I'm too old for much of it to apply to me at this point in time. After ending a 30-year marriage that had become unfulfilling 12 years ago, I tried dating for 10 of those years and have all but given up. I had success attracting women and began relationships with a few of them but they ended in heartbreak and regret. Even though I presume the dynamics are different for people dating in their 50's, 60's and 70's, some of the factors mentioned in the video do apply. Since many single people over 50 are still seeking a mate or at least considering it, I wonder if the doctor would consider making a video similar to this one that focuses on older folks. Sex is still the main driving force for older men, although probably not procreative sex. Older women are well past their need for concern over their biological clocks. But the 'market forces' in the dating pool amongst older people are still very much in play but in many ways the stakes have changed. It could make for an interesting sequel to this video.
Agreed. In many ways the stakes (asset pool) is higher and disparities greater and interested parties (children) more numerous. Then there are the complexities like testamentary issues (wills)… life tenancies, mutual wills with accompanying deeds, testamentary trusts…all the complex ways people need to organize their affairs so that children (even step-children who may have little legal standing) from prior marriages are not left out of the estate. Maybe we need a video on the love side and another one on the legal side for older people?
Definitely would like to hear an analysis of the over 50/60 crowd. Some men in this age group actually do like women their own age so it seems older women can regain a bit of value, but only if they eliminate all expectations.
I would love a video on this subject. Stayed for the kids, kids grown, now what?
I'm 60 and married for 28 years. With age and experience, it seems so obvious what women should do to secure a great partner and family for life. (Admittedly, 30 years earlier I had no clue). The solution for 30's women getting up in age, and still single should do the following: Live more conservatively (buy the knock off handbag), be realistic about their dating / mating options. This likely means settling for the trust worthy, loyal man who is less exciting, somewhat lower (but stable) earnings, and somewhat lesser in looks who will love and provide for you for life. Finally be courageous enough to actually ask a man (on your level) out on that first date - you will triple your chances of success rather than waiting for him to approach you. Also from experience, I can tell you that such women will do the exact opposite.
Very well said
The less exciting men who have interesting hobbies and who can build/fix things with their own bare hands are what women should look for. They need to look for men who can teach their kids good values and skills. Yes, women aren't thinking this way, thanks to social networks.
Men’s rights groups are telling such action of boring simple men to never settle
@@SurpriseMeJT Women do like to keep useful men like that around them but only in the friend zone. They will show interest, if they want an odd-job doing.
Your comment made me understand that women don't love men... They marry a lifestyle and calculate what man is most convenient based on it. There is no real love from women.
Even if women make poor decisions, someone will save them in the end.
Not when the collapse comes.
@gumdeo it's already here.
As a woman who had to climb up from extreme poverty to a thriving career in the sciences, society will help and invest in people who seem grateful and biddable. Men are unwittingly encouraged to be free and out there and to indulge in vices from a young age. So when a man is having a hard time, the person listening to them is subconsciously thinking 'I bet you were naughty in class. I bet you've been to prison'. A woman who needs a hand up will get the help because no one will think had she'll take the aid and use it on vices. So I was a believable charity case. The way we parent and socialise men serves only the 1% who need to be creative, fearless mavericks but it destroys the bottom 10%. A homeless woman will get an emergency bed for the night before a man because she's considered safer and less of a nuisance compared to a man.
Who would save her? The only men that would want to save the woman are the kind of men the woman does not want.
Another copium belief.
There aren't enough men to go around. There is 5 million more women than men in the USA.
Also, Dr. Taraban did not mention that 63% of men in 2023 are NOT looking for hookups or relationships... meaning they are NOT looking for women.
If you account for this fact, that means most women will die alone.
The str8s are not ok. You speak of love as if it is a sale and that idea belongs in the bronze age or in the theocratic corners of the planet. This weird war of the sexes the str8 world is dealing with is going to cause undo heartache. Women do not want to be sold into marriage and men do not want to be seen as a paycheck, yet the two seem incapable of dropping the act and the narrow roles placed on them by society. Open, honest, and compassionate communication and an updated idea of what marriage is will do the str8 world a lot of good.
Agreed. They are NOT OKAY. And this loser guy creating this content hurts all str8s. I’m glad I’m not one. After listening to this dribble, I’m blocking this truly screwed up guy’s channel. It really adds fuel to the fire of sexism. He’s not helping at all.
It is really scary how easy it gets once you’re in the “top ten percent” of men. In college I had a healthy amount of intimate experiences with women, I was 6’2, in phenomenal shape ( I actually modelled for a fitness brand) and I only depended on my looks and charm. My success rate with average looking to slightly above average looking girls was good. With hot chicks, fellow models, etc it wasn’t as high, either way, I still had to put in effort, pick up lines, etc. As soon as I got settled in my career a few years after college , upgraded my car and moved to a fancy neighbourhood (around 27-29, I’m 31 now) my experiences with women, irrespective of looks, became ridiculously easier. It’s crazy, like I’m still in great shape, not quite the 7% body fat 190lbs Adonis that I was in my college days 😅 , but I get significantly more offers from more attractive women now than then. And at this age, the doors to all age groups of women are open. Last week I was with a 22 year old college senior and tomorrow I have a “Netflix date “ with some 34 year old attorney who’s firm was hired by my company.
Enjoy the numbers game if it's in your favour! Have at it! It'd be silly not to!
Won't help you when it comes to relationships however. Women aren't looking to date a HVM. They're looking to date their fantasy idea of a HVM. Not the reality. However good you look, it won't stop them projecting their own fantasy onto you. He's better looking, richer and more charming than you and he has zero expectations of her.
And it won't stop them rinsing you when you inevitably fail to live up to that.
If Tom Brady can't make it work (and he can't) then you'll be extremely lucky to do so.
Sure you do. Lol.
Sounds like a meaningless endeavor
These women are human beings still, yes? Not just stories to share and notches to count?
@@venividivici6418he definitely does. Guys like these get women delivered home as you would a pizza.
When they lose their looks the game changes 😊
This is literally game theory simplified for relationships
12:58 15% of women in option D (lower price tag and settling) sounds extremely low. I'm convinced that the majority of men in long-term relationships (to include marriages) are with women in option D who feel they "settled" for them. These are the men that eventually run into dead bedrooms, cuckoldry, and silver-divorces all which have only increased.
In my opinion, a man makes the offer because a woman is a burden to him. A bachelor has a much quieter simple and peaceful life without a woman. The only reason he chooses a mate is easy sexual access and passing on his legacy through HIS children. Congrats on your subscriber count! Its really taking off!
Wrong. Women refuse to make the offer in order to maintain the leverage and power in the relationship. Women want to be seen and treated as the prize. They want to be pursued and wined and dined. Women will only make the offer if she is dealing with Chad, Tyrone or Chadrone.
Legacy - the only reason I would consider marriage. Variety is the spice of life.
You might want get more data before concluding that marriage provides easy access to sex.
That's why more and more women don't date. So the bachelors have a peacefull life!
Why don't men just pay surrogate mothers to breed THEIR children?
@@CordeliaWagner women and men are dating just fine.
The reason why men don’t want successful career women is not because they are “intimidating “ or older. It’s because they are combative and argumentative. They think too highly of themselves and tell everyone about their success at every opportunity. Finally, they cope poorly with stress at work and you more or less have to book in to spend any time with them.
If you marry an independent post-wall boss babe you have shot yourself in the foot. Congratulations, you just played yourself. You will lose the money, house and kids in divorce. She will see to it that you do.
@@marriagecausesdivorce7540
You are 100% correct. I think my original comment shows that I went through this. Luckily I didn’t marry her but because I was successfully self employed and had the time, I took on all of the childcare and of course paid for everything. Because of course, as the cliche goes, her money is hers and your money is hers. Then I was rewarded with her monkey branching. I feel that a woman wanting a career is almost wholly driven by her wanting to meet higher status men rather than contributing to the family income.
The men are envious. Take my word for it.
@@LisaCulton Take your meds
@@teammo959 Facts! I know it's hard to accept when your woman earns more, gets more recognition, promotions or notoriety or has a thriving business, etc. Dr. Orion just made a video about this - how marriages fail when one party becomes more successful. (So go got try your "meds" line with him)
Now the interesting topic would be, how do we make women aware of this, or even better, should we? It seems that expecting women to understand this is expecting them to fight their inner primal instics wich is very unlikely
Forget it. Before all this nonsense 20 years ago women (moms, grandmothers, aunties) kept their daughters, nieces, granddaughters in check historically because they're the only ones who can... we can't as men unless they are infatuated with you, terrified of you or worse. All of that has been lost because the family unit in the west is severely disrupted. I have plenty of options but I can't even bring myself to go on a date...
As the saying goes, you can't put the toothpaste back in the tube.
@@pauleeb They even used to have a card game called "Old Maid."
@@pauleebWhy should women be kept in check.
@@beowulf_of_wall_st Exactly. Statements such as "how do we make women aware" assume that they will be receptive to the information, digest it rationally, and then act upon it. In the past, women only behaved properly because of immense social pressure. On a certain level, they are aware of declining SMV but it's sort of like facing mortality. We are all aware of it but on a day-to--day basis deny it.
All the more reason for women to get really good jobs. No security In marriage.. Women can always have a child by herself.
The end game of hypergamy and sexual freedom?
Hypergamy and female sexual freedom...long term. Will it work?
Women are lottery tickets. Everyone is a winner, they think. There is no expiry date, they think. They can cash in, anytime, they think. But: is that true? Depends on these questions: Does female sexual freedom and hypergamy work out for women, long term?
My guess: they are fooling themselves...only a guess.
Why I am guessing that female hypergamy and sexual freedom don't work out for women, in the long run:
Humans evolved. For a long time. For 200,000 years. In that time, Mother Nature came up with a mechanism, to help regulate sex and bad behavior. That mechanism is obvious and natural, but overlooked: women get pregnant, in the absence of birth control. This is a natural mechanism, that pushes women towards responsible behavior.
Birth control means women don't have a mechanism telling them to making responsible decisions with their bodies, their lives. Proof: 64 million surgical abortions since Roe vs. Wade. Plus an additional 250 million abortions by pill. I support a woman's right to choose, but that's an awful lot of irresponsible behavior.
To those that say, women can be sexually free...plus act responsibly, I'll ask a Dr. Phil question, that he often asks, about a lot of things: "How's that working for you?"
What does birth control and sexual freedom for women mean? It means men have far less reason to invest in a society....or a marriage. Or any one, particular woman. Nothing in it biologically, for most men. No need to commit, for a man. Women complain men are afraid to commit. They are right. But why? Why are men afraid to commit? Nothing in it, for them: When women get rid of all those babies, they get rid of men having to be responsible, or even wanting to be responsible. Instead they eat Cheetos and sit in their moms basement, playing video games. This ruined men, too.
And of course, this is related to female biology and eggs getting old. Female desirability, her value as a mate, sharply declines with time.... 37 is grandma age, in nature. Listen to Sheryl Sandburg, lean in and go full hypergamy, women?
If women do that, they pay in the end. They usually lose, in the end, I'd guess. It's a short sighted mating strategy that depends on fooling men, giving them a bad deal in marriage, wasting the best years of her life on other men, then giving you the leftovers and expecting you to be grateful, you got anything at all. Then locking you in for a lifetime, expecting you to stick around. Then if you have money, she might leave and you give her money for life. That's the new hypergamy and sexual freedom deal, women are now offering men. And sensible men are walking away. The table is rigged. Don't play games you are not respected in. Don't play games, where you get abused.
I was listening to "Pearl Talk" channel, the recent video "She Gets PISSED At Feminism When She Realized She has been Lied to"...Pearl quotes some stats on female happiness and success in marriage, based on number of sexual partners, female trauma, also stats on abortion etc. It's all linked.
Pearl says the level of trauma in women has risen. Why? Sexual freedom and birth control means lots of partners. That means a lot of trauma.
The basics: Women control sex, not men. But they have no mechanism now, to help them control their irresponsible behavior. I'm an old hippie. A Boomer. We all embraced Sexual Freedom, when it came in, back in the 1960s. Big mistake. Then in 1973 Roe vs. Wade we embraced surgical abortion. Big, big mistake.
How many abortions, so far?.... 64 million so far. Look up the American Abortion clock, online. All this means, women are incentivizing men, not to marry them, not to stay with them. Why should they? Why should men stick around? Why buy the cow, if the milk is for free? 🤠🐮🐄🥛
In the short game, hypergamy and sexual freedom work well. But in the long game? I don't think so. Why not? Nature has rules, consequences, it's a complex long term game. Such as:
If there is no baby involved, if we keep getting rid of them, men have far less reason, to stick around. Far less. Feminists think you can have sexual freedom, plus men will stick around. Feminist Louise Perry figured it out, has lots of online interviews, wrote a recent book saying the Sexual Revolution of my generation of hippies, was a mistake. I agree. We were wrong. Yes, we were wrong. Boomers like me, were wrong. Fix our mistake. So, I would not say blaming women is the answer. No. That's too simple. There is a bigger game here and men have a lot of the moral responsibility, men help create the rules of the game too. And the game we are playing might end in disaster.
How serious is the problem? Jordan Peterson once said our culture may not survive the invention of the birth control pill. I used to think he was crazy. Now I think he was right.
As Pearl says, after 5 partners women go from 80% marriage success rate to 20%. By embracing sexual freedom, women traumatize themselves. Your body, your choice. Men don't want to marry your trauma. However, women still have the power to change all this. It's up to women, not men. We don't control sex. We men should not not not, control sex. Why not? Nature made it that way. In mammals, females control sex. Always. Scott Adams once said if we have a vote on abortion, only women should be allowed to vote. I agree. Your body, your choice. And your consequences. Women set the rule of sex. Not men. Men are supposed to play by those rules. Your rules. That's the way it should be.
What causes women to do this? A screwed up culture, run on dumb ideas, mistakes of Boomers like me. Blame your grandparents. Damn hippies.
Men's bodies are affected far more than women's from children. His body, his choice.
Excellent comment
Society Will always adapt...many new forms of relationships are being created...dont look with your boomer lenses
@@vinipcplayer Only one form of relationship is capable of producing advanced civilization.
"You don't believe the whole universe, could be inside your little sister's purse. You don't believe you're just a living blob. Like Lucy, Freddy Ricky Frank and Bob." The Guess Who. Hippie band. Have a listen. Song "Life in the Bloodstream" 1971. So long Ballantyne Album.
I agree with this video, but I would say that, in reality, women don't really "settle down" with a "lower value" man. This gives the impression that the woman is higher value than him. I would say that, whoever a woman can get married to, that's her real value. In Economics we learn that in a free market, the price of something is determined by both parties in a negotiation. If I'm buying a product, I value that product more than the money I used to pay for it and vice versa for the seller, meaning that the price is determined by the buyer, not the seller. In the sexual marketplace, it's the same. If she is "overpicing" herself, and no one is "buying", then it's not her real value now, is it? Women don't really settle for "less"... They get according to her real value...
But it's her subjective perception she "settled."
Exactly right.
Degree of having omnipresent sexual access does not solely comprise one's "value" relative to others.
@@chipsteve Or to look at it another way: a woman's SMV is always higher than her Marriage Market Value. That is, the pool of men willing to have a ONS or brief fling with a woman is always bigger than the pool of men willing to commit long term to her.
@@beowulf_of_wall_st"alpha widows"
Right! I point this out to conservative women all the time when they are talking about what trad traits make a high value women. Sis, Camilla Parker Bowles married the King of England, not using very trad methods. Then they insist she is not high value. Who got paid more for pussy?
Awesome video. There are a couple ways to parse some of those outcomes. Some women end up trying to lock down the high value man by getting pregnant and baby trapping him. Through child support this “forces” some financial commitment from him then they may settle with a lower value guy that doesn’t mind her being a single mom. Or they don’t settle and just end up a single parent but still receiving child support from the man they decided to baby trap.
I know a few women who baby trapped men. If you go that route in dating (sexually active), men need to use their own protection (condoms or vasectomy) without exception.
The extreme version of that would be NBA groupies.
@@beowulf_of_wall_st Yes, it looks like Gen Zee is waking up.
I just scheduled my vasectomy. I'm 41 and I don't want to have a new family. I already have a 13 and 15-year-old. I just want a cool life partner now with no more kids.
How can you ''baby trap'' someone who willingly has sex with you? Birth control is the responsibility of BOTH.
Your analogies are unparalleled when talking about these topics!! loved this one
Unsubmissive, vindicative & single mother is a very high price to pay for decent men with options, let alone those top 20% of men.
Huh? Who are you talking about?
Most women will watch this and still not understand a single thing you said. On the other hand, what their lil mind would interpret this to be is that you're hating on the fact that they are choosing their path of self love 😂🤣.
As a 55-year-old single male I can attest to the validity of these concepts. Quite unlike my reality when I was a young man I am in high demand and the competition for my attention is fierce. After painful narcissistic marriage of 20 years I now no longer pursue women. They pursue me. The adjustment on my end is getting used to how to deal with all the attention.
GIVE YOUR LIFE TO THE LORD JESUS CHRIST
@@freddiestranger9783😂 eventually. But not just yet.
@@freddiestranger9783 lol....caught me off guard when I opened the thread
@@muchemikimani5318good point 😀😀😀
@@siegfriedoActually bad point: one ASSUMES at 55 that you still have many tomorrows in their future! I know plenty of people who 'ran out of time' even younger than 50! get your spiritual fire insurance while you are still around to use it. because once the grim Reaper comes for you, there are NO MORE 2nd chances. This advertisement has been brought to you by: Mutual of Omaha.
can someone please give me a source for the claims that women in recent times statistically "marry upwards" or that hypergamy is still increasing/more prevalent? Please give me some recent and coherent studies with actual statistics.
I keep hearing a lot of rubbish about "Not enough good men". This completely fails to understand what Orion is saying here: Everything in the sexual marketplace is relative - If all men suddenly became "good" then we would just see the exact same pattern play out - women would still only want the top 1% of this, objectively better, pool
Hypergamy floats
Indeed. The men may be objectively far more valuable than the women, but the women will still want the best. It was ever thus and will not change.
@@beowulf_of_wall_st By stating "there are tons of good men" you miss the point that it is the women who get to decide who is or is not a "good" man. The only way that it could be true that "there are tons of good men" is if there were a lot of men who women would rate as good but of whom they ar unaware. This may be true but there is no evidence for it.
@@dharmadasa66 Wrong. Firstly, there is no objective value scale by which to compare men and women. Secondly, Orion's whole point is that it is womens subjective value scale that is the cause of their problems.
@@SmileyEmoji42 I think you misunderstand me. I agree that it is the subjective value scale of women that is the cause of their problems. By 'objective' in relation to men, I should have clarified, I meant in being able to deliver their end of the bargain in terms of social value. Men still provide the bulk of work that keeps society running. Of course this is being undermined by massive social forces such as those under discussion, and others, so the story is not simple.
One slight problem. The secrets of their playbook is being spread and soon more and more men will be resentful of settling for damaged goods.
Box wine and misery will be the only choice.
hallmark has sold women relationship crack.
Excellent analysis; now if only most women were capable and willing to listen and understand ...
But they are taught to only use their heads for blaming, keeping scores, arguing, rationalizing...; never for actual thinking.
I think the deepest difference in the way men and women are raised is in regard to Truth, in general. As a man, I was raised to value truth above self. But I watch the way mothers teach their daughters, and it goes like _"In situation A you could say X; in situation B it's better to say Y". To "say" something is a "gesture" that falls under some code of Etiquette. The question of whether or not what you "say" is true or false isn't even a consideration. Language, to women, is a means to *get* things or to manipulate people; nothing else. And the result is what we see, specially in how women speak to each other, which is often inscrutable to men, but it is essentially nothing but lies at the verbal level, specially white lies; and any truth that passes between them is passed as innuendo, not as spoken words. And to the extent that words do correspond to ideas, they are often the exact opposite of dictionary meaning, that is, saying one thing to mean the opposite. Which, ironically, women often believe that men meant the opposite when they said what we said. They assume that men live in that same universe and that we should understand their language of innuendos and hints and saying one thing to mean its opposite. Women project onto men the way they themselves are. They assume, for example, that men are thinking about women all the time. If you are not talking, they assume you are fantasizing a woman, like they fantasize men all day long at the office. If we tell them we were thinking about the question of kerosene versus methane for rocket propulsion, they are terribly disappointed, and may decide that we are lying.
The level of misunderstanding is so rampant one wonders how it is even possible for men and women to even talk, let alone bond.
Liked and subscribed.
This right here should be turned into a book. Masterfully articulated. The best RP-aware synopsis of the modern dating landscape that I’ve seen in a while. Clear, concise, without the bitter undertone, and just plain accurate.
The book is coming. But this sounds like hate speech to most womens ears. They've been lied to so many times, the truth becomes unbearable.
I think what women offer is of interest and of value in different ways while a guy ages…especially the more a man gains a certain amount of experience!
That’s why as a man at 53, now that I am divorced after an 8 1/2 year marriage since 2017 and childless?
I am happy and even more so relieved at being aware (and experienced enough) I know what I have to invest in to attract and maintain a lay-dee doesn’t have a R.O.I as I thought it did in my youth and during my marriage…
In fact, in my view, with the amount of M.E.A.T (Money, Energy, Attention & Time) required, I wouldn’t commit to any women no matter how ideal an example a woman may be…just b/c long term women become more incentivized to use their Hypergamy based on how well I fulfill what any one wants and needs in a relationship.
In fact long term, considering the dwindling SMV of Lay-Dees…?
Time may be on men’s side but only if we refrain from committing and investing long term or in LTRs…
….sadly, men still may falter knowing this b/c we still suffer terribly for our thirst and delusions on what we think want from Lay-Dee physical intimacy and validation…even as we as men age…
My choice Dr. Taraban? Yup, you got it right…as women age they become more and more expensive to invest in and maintain, including the cost of rearing and caring for “their” children, meeting the demands and expectations by name, considering their goals (said to be “Our goals”)and wants for ideal lifestyle and as well as managing often their bad choices economically and in regard to their own health related concerns that require real attention- apart from having to deal with one’s own….
To be married is to be a man trying to often unsuccessfully meeting the standards of one’s wife- all the while what one values and respects is either secondary, tertiary or non-issue or concern when everything else and everyone else important to the wife is first, second and etc.
This is why it is my take that “all” women in degrees require that someone- someone usually a thirsty Beta-Bucks dullard is so blind to his own SMV but also even more so the SMV of his wife….as the lay-dee one invests in…
MEN are hardly knowledgeable of what we are sharing versus what women are really actually investing in the guy they marry….
My view of what the end game is for MEN investing in a woman in one of your noted “end games” for women?
Men will actually or learn to see through experience how women are really just costly “sacks” of wants, expectations and demands- that a man has to buy over to risk all he has all the while the same “sack” costs more, more and MORE…overtime!
…while anyone of US (in a committed LTR) gets less and less from what we invest in over-valued “Sack”!!!
Boys and MEN? We are quite pitiful! WE would be better off NOT investing at all in dumb, legal Ponzi-Scheme!
Dr. OT is currently writing a book
Absolutely correct Ryan.
1 / A-7:40 women keep their price tags high, beat out the intersexual competition, and secure the high value man (~1% likely)
2 / B-7:49 women lower their price tags *in order to beat out the intersexual competition*, and secure the high value man (~6% likely)
3 / C-7:58 women keep their price tags high, fail to beat out the intersexual competition, and settle for a lower value man (~53% likely)
4 / D-8:07 women lower their price tags, still fail to beat out the intersexual competition, and settle for a low value man (~15% likely)
5 / E-8:16 women neither secure nor settle, and end up un-partnered (~25% likely)
Great video, but it was a little odd that you said "FIVE endgames" and then labeled each one by letter, why not just number them in the vid? 😉
props
We know full well why "the offer" must still come from the man. It is the clearest transfer of power, appealing to the dumbest and laziest sides of us all. It gives the acceptor the power of accountability -- heavily influenced by her female relatives, friends, and social media --- all while she holds an easier choice out of the whole experience at any time, since she is always less committed to it than the offeror. Why would women give this up?
I enjoyed his tongue in cheek response to why they don't offer. Women want all the benefits and non of the responsibilities of equality.
When you reach the 30-40 age range, women need to swallow their ego and give it up
Excellent post. It is fascinating that older successful women don't seek to "wife up" young bucks more often. Even as women become more successful they aren't willing to assume the role of provider.
Damn. That’s a screenshot if I ever needed one! Well put!
@@monkeyboyalcoholicyep, how does a women see it again ?…”your money is our money and my money is my money.”?
It's nothing but other guys leftovers after 30.
A question for my fellow men here; Learning and knowing about womens dating and mating behaviors, how do you as a non-top tier man, deal with it psychologically? I just feel myself full of hatred, contempt and disgust towards women. Anyone else feel like this? How do you navigate it?
It’s just how it works, don’t be mad at women’s natural instincts, be mad at the ones who took advantage of it.
Women, are also just humans, don’t forget that
Don't waste valuable energy on something you have no control over. Worry about yourself, your immediate family, and your friends. One usually comes by with time. It's better to be ready than to get ready if your future wife/girlfriend comes across you 👍🏾
None of the negative feelings you have towards women will help you. In fact, they will make things worse. Women are what they are, you can't control that or change that. Accept it and try to find a "high quality" woman - that doesn't mean someone with a high paying job or a boss babe, just someone with traditional values who will appreciate you.
I understand that you can't help these feelings. But you still need to fight them. Once you become such a hateful person, you are no longer the good guy. I think that the first thing you should do is to work on not becoming too emotionally dependent on anyone, or expecting too much from anyone. This will make you look more confident, and it will also help you focus more on becoming the best version of yourself instead. You'll then actually find yourself attracting more women. Good luck!
Like the doc says, it is, what it is. Life isn't fair. You won't live a good life in resentment, especially of the things you can't control. As for how I cope? I use to use it as challenge to better myself. But running off of anger only works for so long. Now I just look at it, as one of two ways. While I'm grinding to my full potential at my own pace I find someone or I get there and have my pick later. Now if it's the latter I don't see myself settling down, but then again with my hobbies and such I enjoy more than chasing multiple women.
He leaves out one thing-real love. What also fails to mention is how many extremely unhappy women who have been married since they were in their 20’s there are. Half are divorced.
..And men as well.
Thats why they are divorced. But thats not even related to what he is saying he is referring to in the video. He is speaking on the population of single women and their relative value to the dating market as they age.
Nothing about how women who choose to marry young are unhappy. But that is due to a lapse in judgment in partner choice and possibly the fear of missing out in the current hookup culture. So, if your being honest with yourself its not even related to them making the choice to get married. It just means they chose wrong not that the choice to marry was wrong.
Half are divorced because they married out of real love without counting on other parameters such as compatibility. Compatibility means having the same outlook on life and "end-destination". People can be in love but at the same time having different perspectives on life - the one may want the white fence dream , the other may want a bohemian lifestyle. Love alone is not always enough. The most major point of failure of modern marriages is that people enter into them knowing that this is not necessarily for ever, and doing so even if they are in love. Hence they are far more prone to do it without checking for true compatibility. Marriage is not that much about the "in-love" phase. It is about what follows after that.
Read CAN LOVE LAST by Stephen Mitchell...exceptional
That's such an important point, that men must "make the offer." I thought about this for years, but I did'nt have a term for this. Despite 50 years of feminism, women are still embedded in this role. They can't do it, they just can't do it; "make the offer." (Actually they will for like a 1 o/o man) And this brings about another important point. Women won't "make the offer," but they will invite men to make the offer. They do this with little innuendo's, or body language, or meaningful looks in the eyes, or do they? In my experience, its always ambiguous; "did that waitress just give me a "cop gaze." (copulatory gaze) or am I imagining things? Then I had a dark epiphany; "yes they do this, but it doesn't mean they are interested in you, it means they are manipulating you, usually for money. I see it all the time; bartenders do this, waitresses do this, even real estate agents do this. "Would you like another? (cop gaze)" This overrides rationality in the male brain, "she wants me, I can't turn her down." But really, it means nothing. And at the risk of rambling, an important part of the fact that men must "make the offer," is that this means the man must pay, because he made the offer. And that sets the precedence; then he must pay and pay and pay. Just to close out this rant; this is another pattern I've seen. I call it "the advanced succubus." There are women who specialize in this. They just string men along for as long as they can to see how much they can get from them. Shopping sprees, nice dinners, trips, even paying their rent. Often they have a roster. Go to any strip club in America, and now this abomination is worldwide, and there they are.
5:02 - “If you’re liking what you’re hearing (men), please consider sending this episode to someone who might benefit from it’s message (women)”… 🤣
I do think he meant young women (under 30).
Another man would also likely benefit. Not all men are smartened up to these things. Takes time and maturity for a man to really get it.
@@yourfavoriteentertainment Maturity enough to realize that he has been lied to about what society expects from him and what is being offered in return.
Your whole arguement is based on the assumption that women need men. The truth is, surveys suggest women need security. Men need companionship. If a woman can provide for herself, why would she need someone who thinks of her in terms of commodities? Boys, it's not your income, it's not your looks, sometimes, it's just your attitude. Share this with your bros.
He and Jordan Peterson can form a club called subtle hate on women through psychology. Both seem to be of the same school of thought to me. School of thought being: understated and supposedly intellectual misogyny.
You do need men. You have been living for too long in a society built by men and protected by men that you forgot it. I would say that your children and grandchildren will see a different reality in 10-20 years but I doubt you have any.
@@Candlelight787 dream on
@@FormerCasanova-ji1tb that's a fact you silly girl
@@Candlelight787 nope