You ladies need to be able to tell the difference between a guy who is attracted to you versus a guy who likes you. A guy who likes you will be there for you, he will care for you. But a lot of ladies go for the bad boy because it is exciting. These are the guys who typically get most of the girls. This excitement soon fades and all you,re left with is a guy who doesn't like you. This is not the foundation for a great relationship. The foundations for a great relationship are honesty and caring.
Us guys we are hard wired to get attracted to someone who is physically attractive to us. This hard wiring can of course be overcome through conscious awareness of what us going on but most guys don't have that realisation. You ladies will not understand this because you have to like a guy to sleep with him.
THIS THIS THIS Sadly many people, particularly young women, don't realize they can say no just because someone asks. They can break off relationships or just not have them begin.
i wish someone had told me that just bc a guy is interested doesn’t mean you have to entertain it. i used to have this horrible misconception that someone was better than no one. now i’m teaching myself to fix that mindset
10 signs you are settling for less 1- you justify him a lot ( - but he...) 2- you don't fully accept him for who he is 3- when you're out, you have wandering eyes 4- you envy other couples 5- you fantasize about being single 6- he gives you the "ick" 7- it feels like a chore 8- they don't inspire you 9- you don't respect him (you are not excited about him) 9.5- you pity him 10- you downplay your desires
Then when you dump him and finally get with the one you've dreamed about, they dump you and break your heart and you start thinking the one you dumped wasn't that bad.
When I referred to him as "that boy over there", I knew I didn't respect him anymore. He was a man-child that sat back, forcing me to do everything. It was such a terrible experience. I'm grateful I got rid of him.
I'd rather be single and focused solely on my faith, family, friends, and self than settle for a man who doesn't impress me and complement my personality, faith, and lifestyle. ❣
I rlly needed this. Just recently “broke things” off with a dude (it was a 3 month talking stage). He didn’t compliment any of the stuff u listed especially the faith part. Despite him going to church, his lifestyle & the way he carried himself didn’t seem like he loved God, which led me to stray from God & do some things that I regret. I am only 16 yrs old, but I’ve learned so much from this one dude, & 1 thing is that if he doesn’t love God, then he don’t love me. And the funny thing is that I asked God before the dude & I started talking, if he was the one, and God answered immediately-multiple times-with a no, yet I still ignored. I learned it the hard way. Ladies God knows & sees every hidden convo & thought, He plays no games. Listen to ur instinct & do not settle! If u do settle, u will learn it the hard way
I lost myself, settling for someone I thought I had a genuine connection with. Never again will I lower myself for someone else's comfort. I fell too many times in the relationship that it became normalized. I was so confused why I was even doing it to myself, it didn't feel right. Allowing this man to cross my boundaries and interfere with my alone time, was one of the worst mistakes. I feel like I wasted a whole summer. No more. We leveling up from here. Thank you ma'am!
Settling is dating online. I've had nothing but online dating/relationships and none of them workout. When the time is right you'll meet your husband out and about. Just always be prepared to meet him! 😀
Just because it didn’t work out for you doesn’t mean it’s settling. You can meet your husband online, at work, or out and about. Settling is choosing BUMS online maybe lol
I don't know what happened with the men you met online. But there's a thing called the 80/20 rule. Which is the fact the 80% of women, only swipe right on the top 20% of men. So if 80% of women are competing for only 20% of men, then it's obvious that 60% of those women are going to get left out. The top 20% of men go after the top 20% of women for relationships. And the other 60% of those women are the ones that the men will sleep with, and then usually ghost afterwards. It's not setting to be with someone that's your equal. So online dating doesn't work for most men, because most men don't ever get any matches. Even reasonable attractive, like a 6 or 7 will likely only get 1 or 2 matches a week. Yes, 1 or 2 matches a week. And online dating doesn't work for most women because if they themselves are not in the top 20% of women, then they just get used for sex by the top 20% of men, until he meets a woman that more on his level. But you're right, online dating is easily the worst way to go about dating.
Respect is integral in any relationship with a strong men. If they feel disrespected consistently its like poison in the relationship and can build up resentment.
@@kamrynetia5835 🇯🇲👉real levels 💯that's so true and it's the same for men too we hurt just as women do because your the what make us feel extreme joy in our lives so when women play love games 🎮❤then men start been cold 🥶❤but
both men /women should be more focused if they want that genuine feeling because been played is something that makes a person want isolation from relationships until there's someone worthy to the eyes, mind and heart 💯💯💯💯🤍❤🤍🥂
I almost settled for less than I want in a man because this guy is always around me , what I did is left for holidays just to think clearly and when I thought of it , I realized that’s not the man I want to be in relationship with so I called Him and told him I’m sorry but let’s stay as friends and all this happened like few weeks ago … felt peace right after that …
Recently broke up with my boyfriend because I neither felt loved nor treated right. Have been doubting my decision everyday since then. Just watched this video. Every single sign applies. Jesus. When you look through rose colored glasses all the red flags really do look just like flags
I think that sometimes we refuse to acknowledge that we're settling because the person doesn't have any outwardly aspects that make it seem like we're settling. For example they're attractive, or have a good education, they can even be kind. I think settling can happen even with good people. We can settle with someone who is good but not our person. Just my thoughts. I haven't watched the video yet 😅
I lived with my totally unremarkable, uninspiring ex-bf during the lockdown and it really showed me how much I had settled for him but I chose to turn a blind eye because I thought what we had was love. It was when he abandoned me at my lowest that I began to recall myself occasionally thinking how mundane my life would be if we were going to live like this for the next 40 years of our lives. When these thoughts cross you, listen to them.
I lowered my standards and settled for someone because they were nice to me and loved me.. but i had all the signs you mentioned.. but i felt too bad to dump him because he was a good man and i should be grateful and not be picky... well after investing 17 years into it (we got together when we were teenagers), he actually left me for someone 10 yrs younger (7 months ago).. i wish i would have put myself first and had the courage to walk away with my dignity.
I’ve just left a 2 year relationship after being extremely attached and this also just clarified that my decision was for the best! I had a lot of these things towards the end!
Yes justification is such a big sign & no more dating POTENTIALLY what they could be that’s false hope. He has to tik ALL my boxes manifesting and praying for this!! Also Love this look! Looking like a doll 😍😍💗💗🤍🤍
So true.. I remember being stuck in a relationship hoping that those little breadcrumbs he's giving, will one day turn into croissants LOL. Nope!! Doesn't work like that. Took years to change that.. and it all comes from within You can only attract what you TRULY BELIEVE you deserve.
Everyone who actually puts the effort into a relationship (man or woman) deserves to be with someone that they desire, and that treats them well. However, if you want someone that is truly desirable, then you yourself have to be truly desirable also. This can include personality, wealth, status, or looks. An easy example would be that if you want someone who is physically fit, but you yourself are 100lbs overweight. If you meet someone and think that person is the best that you can get, then you must ask yourself if YOU are the best that that person can get. If you want the best, then you have to be the best as well. Again, this applies to both men and women.
YOU get to choose just as much as they do. You are worthy of someone’s true love, respect and undivided attention. From a self love content creator to another- great topic Breeny. This is very important! ❤️
I know all the rationales but it is so so so painful and heartbreaking to let go. I tried to invest less, I tried to ignore him, I tried to focus on my work, I tried to keep my life busy, but in the times where I am alone, all those emotions hit me back.
this hurts the most. Giving them endless chances, changing your ways to accommodate theirs, even trying to be more patient and understanding with them hoping all of your good deeds rub off on to them but they just stay the same….
Its hard getting it right, you don’t/shouldn’t settle but you should also be patient with the person you date vice versa. Mind reading relationships are very real, communication is key and being open about needs, wants and boundaries.
this is very important. give them the chance to hear what you need and see if they respond before you're out the door. i think even within a relationship people are afraid to ask for what they need because they don't think they deserve it/are being too demanding, then think I'm gonna go get my needs magically met somewhere else. the grass isn't greener on the other side, its greener where you water it. but after you try to water it and it's still no good, then you can leave.
Girl, it's not this. It is me never liking anyone. And yes, I give them chances and afterwards I see I am not interested because my life without them is more interesting. I only once liked someone and it was mutual. Although I liked him so much, like no one ever before, he couldn't give me more so it ended. My heart is dry, empty and bored since ever.. but I really try to love
It also happens to me, I rarely like anyone. I can't believe it when I see people jumping from a serious relationship to another. But it's probably because they're all having toxic relationships.
This is my first time running across this channel and I'm glad I found it!!! As far as happiness in a relationship, I personally feel that burden lies more on the individual person than being in a perfect match. No person can consistently make someone else happy because humans are imperfect and everyone has flaws. Even if for a time someone buys you great gifts, or looks nice, treats you well, finishes your sentences, etc, etc, over the course of time that person will fail because they are imperfect. I think the happiest couples are filled with people who are happy with themselves and respect the individuality of the other person and recognize that they have the ultimately responsibility to manage their own emotions, self esteems. When a person is more insecure about themselves they are more likely to compare their life and their relationships with others, vs be content with what they have, even with what they have is good and healthy.
Well said! Great to see you here and sharing your thoughts and perspectives. I've reviewed one of her videos in the past and made similar points. I really love your channel too ✨😄
@c.c6909 Yes a great comment. It's the lack of self esteem in comparing relationships. Man, I did my best to be good to her, she even said I treated her well. But she didn't "have the feelings". She broke off with me just recently. Now I'm scouring the web to see how the inner woman thinks, you know stuff they don't tell you to not hurt your feelings. One if my questions was was she just afraid of "settling" for me?
I don’t believe in settling but I believe in also being patient with people especially when they are trying. Dating culture these days is “if they don’t meet your criteria dump them and move on” I don’t really agree except if it’s abusive learn to be patient with people and if they don’t change even your gut will tell you it’s time to give up. Patient people enjoy people.
Omg. Now I feel terrible. I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and I feel some of these things. What I really can’t take is when he says “I’m a loser.” or “I don’t deserve you” or “I’m afraid you’ll leave me” and he tries really hard to be good to me. But I’m the back of my mind I’m like “if you think you’re a loser and that I could do better wouldn’t think it wise of me to do just that?” Every time he comes down on himself I’m always trying to lift him up and encourage him. And the shit gets really exhausting. I have my moments too, but damn. I know I could find someone who is a lot more confident, accomplished and sure of himself. But I really don’t want to hurt him or start over. He is really sweet and so many other things that I adore. And I want it to work. I just doubt it.
My cousin once said " I am so grateful to be chosen". I asked if she " chose" her husband and she said " after years of being rejected by men and through relationships, I don't want to choose anymore, it's more important he loves me more" . It's very fear-based. She has her daughter now, but I don't often see her really smile around him.
also, settling is disrespecting the person in question. they don't know you don't really love them for them. im pretty sure they'd want you to leave them if they knew why you were staying. free them and yourself 💗
In marriage being bored of one's spouse can happen. The sparks must be revived regularly. The points before I can agree, but for the 5 to 7, it can happen that the relationship becomes monotonous, and even that at times someone might want to be reallyl like alone. And become melancholic about being single (not to go with someone else lol). That can happen. Because love is a choice, not about emotions. Prior to the wedding that would be alarming to already feel like that tho. But after years of relationship romance must be nurtured. Hope to of course have a passionate mariage from beginning to end.
honestly, i've found a lot of her messages are just not realistic and living in wonderland. Yes there should be hard boundaries (abuse, cheating, lying) but alot of her other standards I dont think is rooted in genuine love. I hear a lot of "I, me" statements. relationships are up and down, they take work
@@Dee-mn4ud It's because most people (particularly Women) in this generation would rather listen to someone tell them what they want to hear, regardless of how unrealistic the message is. A lot of her message is coming from a place of fear/scarcity. "Judge a Tree by the Fruits it produces" ...
I've had a love-hate relationship with Breeny this past year because she speaks so much truth and I wasn't ready to apply it in my life. Thank you so much for reminding me that I deserve what I want💙
You are so wise breeny. Literally a gift from God. Thank you for your continued contribution to the world. Wishing you pure love, prosperity and abundance.
First of all, let me tell you, you are glowing, the baby pink suits you!! And second, thanks for the video, on point!!! I did settle in past, with somebody who was not on the same level with IQ and specially EQ, never again. If you settle, you won't be happy. People might call you difficult and try to diminish the standards you have settled for yourself and the people around you. But I'd rather be single than settle and be unhappy ..
My baby is almost at 600k i almost choked on my drink!! This is so amazing ive been subscribed for almost 4yrs now this is incredible i love u so much Breeny💋💋🥺😭🙏🏾
Good tips! Learnt alot in my journey and definitely not settling. Ready to be single if I have to and that's okay. I need to be happy with my life and my standards. I'm hopeful someone will come along and it will work, big words important for it to work is compromising and communication!
AMAZING VIDEO!! Breeny you've done it again, I swear you know me. You've dissected my last relationship and yesssss I KNEW I settled. I'd rather be alone than frustrated IN a relationship. Luv your boss energy 👏🏼
A sign that I have noticed from friends is that they start excusing his behavior. Always justifying it and using “that’s just the way he is/the way he thinks” as a reason for his shortcomings. A grown man should have integrity to not justify cheating. That’s one that irritates me
Reason number eleven is you cant stop cussing. You wake up next to him you cuss, he kisses you on your forehead before going to work you cuss him, he phones in the middle of the day you cuss him, he comes home with flowers and chocolates you cuss him, he tries to make love you cuss him and before he goes to sleep you cuss him. Then you repeated it first thing in the morning.
Singles looking to seriously date ; Make it a point to go to a minimum of 15 dates a month Don’t keep contacts of men you don’t see urslef marrying Don’t make excuses for people (that’s the whole point of meeting to choose ) Before u know you’ll have a good number of options , little time wasted and not much attachment DO NOT SLEEP with ur suitors it’s interviews no one gets job privileges until there hired ….only the best candidate gets hired for a job . You don’t get chosen , u choose Goodluck 💕
This was all the clarity that I needed. For years I couldn’t explain the reasons why but this is what my heart was saying, thank you. ❤️ I’m in peace of my choices now.
Not going to lie, I’m struggling with being single right now. It’s a foreign feeling for me because I’ve always been pretty content. I recently ended a situation where the guy was being hot and cold (he was a good person but had intimacy fears) and clearly it wasn’t going to go well down the road. Thank you for this video. It’s reminded me that I don’t need to settle for a not so great situation because I’m lonely.
If you need hlp, to get back your ex I know of someone who can help you, fix your broken relationship reunite with your soulmate including saving your marriage from divorce
While we have been in a 3 month relationship (good at first then it got weird) I come to realization that i have been settling 😔. Going out of my way to do too much. No effort on his part. Making excuses for his actions too much justification. I made him a priority and he made me an option I thought he would change by letting him see how hard I was going for him. Welp!!! Im done as of today nothing has changed. Thanks Breeny💕✨ loving your UA-cam content
First sign. Your not happy. Never make anyone a Priority who treats you like an Option #mayaangelou Breeny your a GORGEOUS Entrepreneurs and deserve a High Value Man who ADORES you!! 💞
For me I think when I knew I was sacrificing my career goals to please him, huge red flag. Sometimes I felt like I was doing the right thing, but in reality it was a disservice to myself.
Totally agree however I think this applies best to someone who is emotionally mature. Abandonment trauma will disguise itself as convincing yourself that you’re settling as a form of self-sabotage. There are AMAZING people out there getting left by people they have actually settled for, because their partners have abandonment trauma that completely turns them off to amazing people haha
In another note, the fear of just feeling empty if someone leaves is a big thing too. It prevents people from leaving unhealthy relationship where they aren't happy.
I always check the playback speed to see if it’s normal cus the way you speak sounds fast like you’re rapping. Always spitting some hot🥵 fire🔥 knowledge!🤣♥️✨
Just blocked someone for telling me to “carry on” after only getting to know each other for a week because he was ignoring me so i ignored him back… then he sent me sex videos on Twitter so I blocked his number & on Twitter. We are not settling on our standards. No thank u!!
Sexual needs being compromised are important too, and u shouldn’t settle for a man that doesn’t fully sexually fulfill you then you shouldn’t ignore that either.
That’s the problem, y’all think if the man is good in bed then he’s a good man . NO he has to be good in every area . Sex is a PLUS not a priority. This is why y’all settle .
@@Sandrinarhonda I see sex as a bid for connection. When I am turned down constantly, then that is a problem. He only wanted to fulfill me sexually when I decide to leave. I never felt the connection with him though. Sex is more than just sex to some people. That's my perspective.
I do agree with you because for a long time Men have gotten away with the idea that their sexual satisfaction is more important. However, I don't think this is a deal-breaker. Women can teach their men how to satisfy them. Many women are too scared to tell men exactly what they want in the bedroom and this is something we have to do away with. Its starts with her. If he outright refuses then he should be gotten rid of. But saying that a woman shouldn't settle for a man who doesn't satisfy her sexually is like saying men shouldn't settle for women who don't satisfy them and both of them are just icky.
First of all, I’m always gonna be the one doing the choosing 😌. I’ll always make them think they chose me! Ladies we are the ones who get to accept ❤️ remember you set the standard. Love, Desarae ✨
@@firecast3321 it’s ultimately women’s responsibility to choose. As the beings who bring forth life, we must select very carefully the quality of which males’ essence we allow to be reproduced into further existence. We are the natural receivers spiritually and physically
Hahahahahha sis why are you in my life like this … are you watching me from over the street somewhere 🙆🏽♀️🙆🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️😆😆🤣🤣😆 thank you so much I needed this . Keep them coming black Queen
Daamn! This is literally the story of my life! Just like you said, I was so concerned about being chosen and forgot I needed to choose as well.. This is very well articulated and I felt like you had been peeping into my life to make this video lol. I think you should do another video for steps to follow after you realize you settled for less. And also reasons why people settle for less
Everything she said is me. The problem is that its difficult to leave. I find myself falling back. I totally hate it and cant wait to go to a new country to stay away from him. Its very difficult but i guess thats what it takes to find long lasting happiness.
everything you've just said was SO my attitude towards my dirty stankin' ex 💩 it took the nice guy I've got now to realise what a hot mess I used to be in!! lol
just found your channel and only watched 2 vids, i already am so appreciative of your knowledge its feels sooo good to know you put such EMPOWERING content out to us free alot of people can do alot watching your channel, thank you breenyyy!!
I don’t like dating guys whom own much more than I do. This often creates toxicity around sooner or later. Can’t imagine a break up after living with someone in their house. What then? Absolutely not an option for me. Having things on my own gives me confidence and power to be with someone that is reaching my standards, I won’t ever be settling because I require never less than what I bring to the table.
Hello friend, sorry for interrupting your comment looks interesting, I try recommending you to Dr James helped me attract my sp and restored my love back to me..
I hope you see this! you should touch on fear of intimacy, I'm dealing with it & would love to hear your advice on it. I love your content by the way, youre saving me.
I am at a point were I have to accept that no matter what he is who he been showing me. It was hard but I am doing fine now. I just know we falling apart and there is nothing or no one that will save the relationship. And the fact that all those points perfectly fit me
I have never been in a great relationship. I settled for someone who was inconsistent didn’t really communicate with me on a daily basis. Didn’t call much wanted to always text. Plus he didn’t Allow me to speak about my feelings he just brushed them under the rug. Anytime I would speak up for myself he saw it as me being mean. Which I wasn’t. He didn’t want me to complain. I can’t be with a man who wants me to be quiet all the time. And not speak up for myself. He kept a lot of things from me. He really didn’t want to open up. I don’t trust somebody like that at all. I really lost myself and my self worth I felt like I wasn’t good enough or pretty enough. As of now I don’t think I want to date or even get married. Because I never met a man who is able to meet my standards at all.
Did we date the same exact guy?! Day 2 of the breakup. I literally told him every time i speak on how hes emotionally neglecting me and I'm hurt he'd say I'm so mean and roasting him. Not once did he ask how he hurt me and let's fix this no, he just wants a mannequin. Someone without needs, opinions, or ambition.
On a related note: I have noticed that it is common practice for people to take up dating a person "in the meantime". As in, finding a person who is just okay enough (they may not have anything in common or even really like each other) and engaging in a relationship with them out of sheer boredom. I have always thought this was ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS. I cannot bring myself to simply tolerate a person who holds such an intimate place in my life. I've gotta be all the way for a person. Not 20%, not 70%, not 92%. I will stay by myself until I can get with somebody all the way, because I can't imagine being 'occupied' when my blessing comes along. Oh no ma'am. Can't play myself like that. Then you're stuck with somebody and missing out on the right one for you.
Yes, I see my deal breakers. Omg, he wants me to accept him as he is. I am okay with walking away. I can’t accept it. Your video resonates with me so much. Thank you!!
Thank you for this. I knew deep down inside that my partner (now ex) and I are incompatible, but I just didn't have the courage to leave. I'm single again and I'm already so much happier
I always felt guilty for wanting a successful man....i was told every successful.man has a woman behind it... I always felt that i should settle down with anyone in future Am also working hard😄 Am glad am hearing this video when am 21
You are so right ! You should never settle. I'm just sorry I didn't get to hear this before I got into a relationship and then marriage, where I know I just settled and it wasn't the right fit....
Wow this is such a good video! I'm currently dating someone and as soon as I started watching, I knew that I've been settling. What really did it was when you said you pity him. I literally have continued to date him because I simply don't want to hurt his feelings and tell him that he's not my person. It makes me feel like shit.
I just clicked. I wanted to say thank you for doing what you do, guiding us and being so candid and vulnerable in your story. You are appreciated. I hope you are doing well 💕
This is so good. He’s such a good man! He’s been so kind, sweet, unconditionally loving, loyal, etc. But I often feel like I could be settling. I have a wondering eye when we’re out. Because I feel more like his best friend, and not his lover. I don’t feel physically attracted to him…. I feel guilty for this of course. He is an amazing partner and person. He just lacks romance. And I want the sparks/ fireworks/ romance. He can’t give me that. He’s also not financially stable enough for me and what I want. I do sometimes feel the ick around him. He’s messy and has ADD and forgets stuff all the time! He does annoy me often and I catch myself wanting to change him. I don’t get excited to text or call him….. it just feels boring. We’ve been dating a year in November and I think it’s time I move on. I just need the courage to. ❤️🥺
In this exact situation right now. He's kind and caring and loyal, but the chemistry and romance just isn't there. We just talked about it the other day (because it's been literal weeks since we've touched or kissed) and he's been feeling the distance too. He tells me he loves me and wants the relationship to work, but he also acknowledges that it isn't and just wants me to be happy. I'm so torn because I feel I'll never find anyone with his good qualities who also makes me feel that romantic passionate love.
I relate to, not all, but most of these. Like she said, my BF checks most of my boxes but is missing some. I got emotionally attached because I’ve always sorta had low self esteem. Not because anyone told me so but just from life in general. Now it’s hard to leave because I’ve put so much into the relationship already. I didn’t want to admit that I feel like I’m settling in certain aspects of the relationship, but this video kind of opened my eyes a bit more.
"Don’t be so concerned about being chosen that you forget to choose."
Great video. Lots of truths.
This!!!👏👏👏
You ladies need to be able to tell the difference between a guy who is attracted to you versus a guy who likes you. A guy who likes you will be there for you, he will care for you. But a lot of ladies go for the bad boy because it is exciting. These are the guys who typically get most of the girls. This excitement soon fades and all you,re left with is a guy who doesn't like you. This is not the foundation for a great relationship. The foundations for a great relationship are honesty and caring.
Us guys we are hard wired to get attracted to someone who is physically attractive to us. This hard wiring can of course be overcome through conscious awareness of what us going on but most guys don't have that realisation. You ladies will not understand this because you have to like a guy to sleep with him.
Video barely started and already dropping gems.
Women should know they are the prize winner not the man.
I always tell young people “just because they ask, doesn’t mean you have to say yes.”
THIS THIS THIS
Sadly many people, particularly young women, don't realize they can say no just because someone asks. They can break off relationships or just not have them begin.
No is a complete statement. Yh
i wish someone had told me that just bc a guy is interested doesn’t mean you have to entertain it. i used to have this horrible misconception that someone was better than no one. now i’m teaching myself to fix that mindset
10 signs you are settling for less
1- you justify him a lot ( - but he...)
2- you don't fully accept him for who he is
3- when you're out, you have wandering eyes
4- you envy other couples
5- you fantasize about being single
6- he gives you the "ick"
7- it feels like a chore
8- they don't inspire you
9- you don't respect him (you are not excited about him)
9.5- you pity him
10- you downplay your desires
Then when you dump him and finally get with the one you've dreamed about, they dump you and break your heart and you start thinking the one you dumped wasn't that bad.
@@KnowledgeSeeker78491 exactly
@@KnowledgeSeeker78491 it happens 👎🏾
Thank youuu
you are the best thank you ! I always look for someone to sum it up
When I referred to him as "that boy over there", I knew I didn't respect him anymore. He was a man-child that sat back, forcing me to do everything. It was such a terrible experience. I'm grateful I got rid of him.
Happy for you
@@lesleybunkete8018 Thank you.
@@lesleybunkete8018 Man-child..says it’s all.
I'd rather be single and focused solely on my faith, family, friends, and self than settle for a man who doesn't impress me and complement my personality, faith, and lifestyle. ❣
Compliment your lifestyle? You mean you’d want him to go Dutch with you on a KFC take-out?
@@SpiritOfOrange I don't see how your comment relates to what I said 😆😅
@@kenniefae
Indeed.
If you’re easily lead by your feelings then relating to reality may become challenging.
@@SpiritOfOrange I don't think we're on the same page here, but your opinion is your opinion so I relent 🤗
I rlly needed this. Just recently “broke things” off with a dude (it was a 3 month talking stage). He didn’t compliment any of the stuff u listed especially the faith part. Despite him going to church, his lifestyle & the way he carried himself didn’t seem like he loved God, which led me to stray from God & do some things that I regret. I am only 16 yrs old, but I’ve learned so much from this one dude, & 1 thing is that if he doesn’t love God, then he don’t love me. And the funny thing is that I asked God before the dude & I started talking, if he was the one, and God answered immediately-multiple times-with a no, yet I still ignored. I learned it the hard way. Ladies God knows & sees every hidden convo & thought, He plays no games. Listen to ur instinct & do not settle! If u do settle, u will learn it the hard way
I lost myself, settling for someone I thought I had a genuine connection with. Never again will I lower myself for someone else's comfort. I fell too many times in the relationship that it became normalized. I was so confused why I was even doing it to myself, it didn't feel right. Allowing this man to cross my boundaries and interfere with my alone time, was one of the worst mistakes. I feel like I wasted a whole summer. No more. We leveling up from here. Thank you ma'am!
Yes
Settling is dating online. I've had nothing but online dating/relationships and none of them workout. When the time is right you'll meet your husband out and about. Just always be prepared to meet him! 😀
Wow. Exactly what I needed to hear..thanks, I’ve been considering dating online again; yuck!!
I feel the same way…. There is something about organic chemistry, that spark, that goes unmatched.
Just because it didn’t work out for you doesn’t mean it’s settling. You can meet your husband online, at work, or out and about. Settling is choosing BUMS online maybe lol
It's definitely okay to meet online. Not okay to never meet in real life and remain committed to someone you don't know in person.
I don't know what happened with the men you met online. But there's a thing called the 80/20 rule. Which is the fact the 80% of women, only swipe right on the top 20% of men. So if 80% of women are competing for only 20% of men, then it's obvious that 60% of those women are going to get left out. The top 20% of men go after the top 20% of women for relationships. And the other 60% of those women are the ones that the men will sleep with, and then usually ghost afterwards. It's not setting to be with someone that's your equal. So online dating doesn't work for most men, because most men don't ever get any matches. Even reasonable attractive, like a 6 or 7 will likely only get 1 or 2 matches a week. Yes, 1 or 2 matches a week. And online dating doesn't work for most women because if they themselves are not in the top 20% of women, then they just get used for sex by the top 20% of men, until he meets a woman that more on his level. But you're right, online dating is easily the worst way to go about dating.
Justification is a problem. I used made excuses for everybody in my life who abused me. Never make excuses for bad behavior.
I totally agree with RESPECT,when you don’t respect a man you are not proud of him and the relationship makes you feel uncomfortable 😣
Respect is integral in any relationship with a strong men. If they feel disrespected consistently its like poison in the relationship and can build up resentment.
When you see potential but it’s not reality
Omg THAT
never settle cuz you’ll regret it wasted time wasted energy
you serious babygirl that's cap because you weren't focusing on what you deserve 👉💯👸🏻
@@kidskater0079 its not cap..some women really be wasting their time cuz they miss the signs or clearly too dumb in love
@@kamrynetia5835 🇯🇲👉real levels 💯that's so true and it's the same for men too we hurt just as women do because your the what make us feel extreme joy in our lives so when women play love games 🎮❤then men start been cold 🥶❤but
both men /women should be more focused if they want that genuine feeling because been played is something that makes a person want isolation from relationships until there's someone worthy to the eyes, mind and heart 💯💯💯💯🤍❤🤍🥂
I almost settled for less than I want in a man because this guy is always around me , what I did is left for holidays just to think clearly and when I thought of it , I realized that’s not the man I want to be in relationship with so I called
Him and told him I’m sorry but let’s stay as friends and all this happened like few weeks ago … felt peace right after that …
The relationship must be perfect. No less than perfect.
@@TAZUTRA No lasting relationship is perfect; it’s sanctifying.
@@TAZUTRA believe me if it was perfect it would be boring. Nothing is meant to be perfect in life. ❤️Stay realistic while keeping your standards high
Recently broke up with my boyfriend because I neither felt loved nor treated right. Have been doubting my decision everyday since then. Just watched this video. Every single sign applies. Jesus. When you look through rose colored glasses all the red flags really do look just like flags
Same
I think that sometimes we refuse to acknowledge that we're settling because the person doesn't have any outwardly aspects that make it seem like we're settling. For example they're attractive, or have a good education, they can even be kind. I think settling can happen even with good people. We can settle with someone who is good but not our person. Just my thoughts. I haven't watched the video yet 😅
My mother and support worker adore my guy but even they admit that our imbalanced commitment, communication and goals are not fair on me
I lived with my totally unremarkable, uninspiring ex-bf during the lockdown and it really showed me how much I had settled for him but I chose to turn a blind eye because I thought what we had was love. It was when he abandoned me at my lowest that I began to recall myself occasionally thinking how mundane my life would be if we were going to live like this for the next 40 years of our lives. When these thoughts cross you, listen to them.
I lowered my standards and settled for someone because they were nice to me and loved me.. but i had all the signs you mentioned.. but i felt too bad to dump him because he was a good man and i should be grateful and not be picky... well after investing 17 years into it (we got together when we were teenagers), he actually left me for someone 10 yrs younger (7 months ago).. i wish i would have put myself first and had the courage to walk away with my dignity.
I’ve just left a 2 year relationship after being extremely attached and this also just clarified that my decision was for the best! I had a lot of these things towards the end!
How did you manage to leave I’m struggling with the attachment :(
Yes justification is such a big sign & no more dating POTENTIALLY what they could be that’s false hope. He has to tik ALL my boxes manifesting and praying for this!! Also Love this look! Looking like a doll 😍😍💗💗🤍🤍
💯🎯
So true.. I remember being stuck in a relationship hoping that those little breadcrumbs he's giving, will one day turn into croissants LOL.
Nope!! Doesn't work like that. Took years to change that.. and it all comes from within
You can only attract what you TRULY BELIEVE you deserve.
Everyone who actually puts the effort into a relationship (man or woman) deserves to be with someone that they desire, and that treats them well. However, if you want someone that is truly desirable, then you yourself have to be truly desirable also. This can include personality, wealth, status, or looks. An easy example would be that if you want someone who is physically fit, but you yourself are 100lbs overweight. If you meet someone and think that person is the best that you can get, then you must ask yourself if YOU are the best that that person can get. If you want the best, then you have to be the best as well. Again, this applies to both men and women.
YOU get to choose just as much as they do. You are worthy of someone’s true love, respect and undivided attention.
From a self love content creator to another- great topic Breeny. This is very important! ❤️
Sadly, so many women don't realize they too can choose. I had this convo with my friend last year.
@@tacrewgirl Yes, I wish I could wake them UP!
Just subbed xo
@@damndons Yay!! Thank you!! 🤗❤️
Thank you D.E.Y.A sadly that is one sided because people tend to think one person calls the shots and that couldn't be more inaccurate.
I'm only through the intro but I have to say this... Woman you choose your words so damn well. It hits deep all the time! Wow
Self-love is sooo important!
I know all the rationales but it is so so so painful and heartbreaking to let go. I tried to invest less, I tried to ignore him, I tried to focus on my work, I tried to keep my life busy, but in the times where I am alone, all those emotions hit me back.
this hurts the most. Giving them endless chances, changing your ways to accommodate theirs, even trying to be more patient and understanding with them hoping all of your good deeds rub off on to them but they just stay the same….
Practice self love and Focus on yourself. Time heals all wounds.x
ask God to help you forget about him
Its hard getting it right, you don’t/shouldn’t settle but you should also be patient with the person you date vice versa. Mind reading relationships are very real, communication is key and being open about needs, wants and boundaries.
!!!!!
this is very important. give them the chance to hear what you need and see if they respond before you're out the door. i think even within a relationship people are afraid to ask for what they need because they don't think they deserve it/are being too demanding, then think I'm gonna go get my needs magically met somewhere else. the grass isn't greener on the other side, its greener where you water it. but after you try to water it and it's still no good, then you can leave.
Girl, it's not this. It is me never liking anyone. And yes, I give them chances and afterwards I see I am not interested because my life without them is more interesting.
I only once liked someone and it was mutual. Although I liked him so much, like no one ever before, he couldn't give me more so it ended.
My heart is dry, empty and bored since ever.. but I really try to love
Same here.. don't know how to feel about myself tbh..
Same 🙂🖤
It also happens to me, I rarely like anyone. I can't believe it when I see people jumping from a serious relationship to another. But it's probably because they're all having toxic relationships.
@@nevergiveup9937 right
You’re not letting yourself go girl. Deep down somewhere, it’s fear holding you back…see a therapist …
This is my first time running across this channel and I'm glad I found it!!! As far as happiness in a relationship, I personally feel that burden lies more on the individual person than being in a perfect match. No person can consistently make someone else happy because humans are imperfect and everyone has flaws. Even if for a time someone buys you great gifts, or looks nice, treats you well, finishes your sentences, etc, etc, over the course of time that person will fail because they are imperfect. I think the happiest couples are filled with people who are happy with themselves and respect the individuality of the other person and recognize that they have the ultimately responsibility to manage their own emotions, self esteems. When a person is more insecure about themselves they are more likely to compare their life and their relationships with others, vs be content with what they have, even with what they have is good and healthy.
Well said! Great to see you here and sharing your thoughts and perspectives. I've reviewed one of her videos in the past and made similar points. I really love your channel too ✨😄
Best comment
@c.c6909 Yes a great comment. It's the lack of self esteem in comparing relationships. Man, I did my best to be good to her, she even said I treated her well. But she didn't "have the feelings". She broke off with me just recently. Now I'm scouring the web to see how the inner woman thinks, you know stuff they don't tell you to not hurt your feelings. One if my questions was was she just afraid of "settling" for me?
I don’t believe in settling but I believe in also being patient with people especially when they are trying. Dating culture these days is “if they don’t meet your criteria dump them and move on” I don’t really agree except if it’s abusive learn to be patient with people and if they don’t change even your gut will tell you it’s time to give up. Patient people enjoy people.
Fully agree
I agree! I haven't achieved all my goals....yet! Doesn't mean I NEVER will. We have to give love/people a chance to grow and mature.
@@malhunt7 exactly.
@@thickseptember Hello if you need help in relationship coaching and getting over narcissist kindly WhatsApp us for mentorship.
@@malhunt7 some people have standards noone will be able to meet ever. And people change as well life isn't consistent and so aren't people.
Omg. Now I feel terrible. I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and I feel some of these things. What I really can’t take is when he says “I’m a loser.” or “I don’t deserve you” or “I’m afraid you’ll leave me”
and he tries really hard to be good to me. But I’m the back of my mind I’m like “if you think you’re a loser and that I could do better wouldn’t think it wise of me to do just that?” Every time he comes down on himself I’m always trying to lift him up and encourage him. And the shit gets really exhausting. I have my moments too, but damn.
I know I could find someone who is a lot more confident, accomplished and sure of himself. But I really don’t want to hurt him or start over. He is really sweet and so many other things that I adore. And I want it to work. I just doubt it.
Geez, poor guy. Self sabbatage. He needs professional help. If you lose respect for him, it's over for him.
My cousin once said " I am so grateful to be chosen". I asked if she " chose" her husband and she said " after years of being rejected by men and through relationships, I don't want to choose anymore, it's more important he loves me more" . It's very fear-based. She has her daughter now, but I don't often see her really smile around him.
also, settling is disrespecting the person in question. they don't know you don't really love them for them. im pretty sure they'd want you to leave them if they knew why you were staying. free them and yourself 💗
In marriage being bored of one's spouse can happen. The sparks must be revived regularly. The points before I can agree, but for the 5 to 7, it can happen that the relationship becomes monotonous, and even that at times someone might want to be reallyl like alone. And become melancholic about being single (not to go with someone else lol). That can happen. Because love is a choice, not about emotions. Prior to the wedding that would be alarming to already feel like that tho. But after years of relationship romance must be nurtured. Hope to of course have a passionate mariage from beginning to end.
Thank you for this realistic comment
I totally agree with this.
honestly, i've found a lot of her messages are just not realistic and living in wonderland. Yes there should be hard boundaries (abuse, cheating, lying) but alot of her other standards I dont think is rooted in genuine love. I hear a lot of "I, me" statements. relationships are up and down, they take work
@@Dee-mn4ud It's because most people (particularly Women) in this generation would rather listen to someone tell them what they want to hear, regardless of how unrealistic the message is.
A lot of her message is coming from a place of fear/scarcity.
"Judge a Tree by the Fruits it produces" ...
@@caesarx8139 whose msgs are we talking about? Brenny?
I've had a love-hate relationship with Breeny this past year because she speaks so much truth and I wasn't ready to apply it in my life. Thank you so much for reminding me that I deserve what I want💙
You are so wise breeny. Literally a gift from God. Thank you for your continued contribution to the world. Wishing you pure love, prosperity and abundance.
So Pretty🤎✨
First of all, let me tell you, you are glowing, the baby pink suits you!! And second, thanks for the video, on point!!! I did settle in past, with somebody who was not on the same level with IQ and specially EQ, never again. If you settle, you won't be happy. People might call you difficult and try to diminish the standards you have settled for yourself and the people around you. But I'd rather be single than settle and be unhappy ..
My baby is almost at 600k i almost choked on my drink!! This is so amazing ive been subscribed for almost 4yrs now this is incredible i love u so much Breeny💋💋🥺😭🙏🏾
And now she’s at 603!😭🥺
@@stacey6229 I’m so excited 😝💅🏾😍😍
Good tips! Learnt alot in my journey and definitely not settling. Ready to be single if I have to and that's okay. I need to be happy with my life and my standards. I'm hopeful someone will come along and it will work, big words important for it to work is compromising and communication!
AMAZING VIDEO!! Breeny you've done it again, I swear you know me. You've dissected my last relationship and yesssss I KNEW I settled. I'd rather be alone than frustrated IN a relationship. Luv your boss energy 👏🏼
A sign that I have noticed from friends is that they start excusing his behavior. Always justifying it and using “that’s just the way he is/the way he thinks” as a reason for his shortcomings. A grown man should have integrity to not justify cheating. That’s one that irritates me
Reason number eleven is you cant stop cussing. You wake up next to him you cuss, he kisses you on your forehead before going to work you cuss him, he phones in the middle of the day you cuss him, he comes home with flowers and chocolates you cuss him, he tries to make love you cuss him and before he goes to sleep you cuss him. Then you repeated it first thing in the morning.
Singles looking to seriously date ; Make it a point to go to a minimum of 15 dates a month
Don’t keep contacts of men you don’t see urslef marrying
Don’t make excuses for people (that’s the whole point of meeting to choose )
Before u know you’ll have a good number of options , little time wasted and not much attachment
DO NOT SLEEP with ur suitors it’s interviews no one gets job privileges until there hired ….only the best candidate gets hired for a job .
You don’t get chosen , u choose
Goodluck 💕
Thank you keep these tips coming I’m glad I found this channel💕
Amen.
This was all the clarity that I needed. For years I couldn’t explain the reasons why but this is what my heart was saying, thank you. ❤️ I’m in peace of my choices now.
Thank you so much for this video❤️ it made me realize that I don’t appreciate and value myself. I’m leveling up my standards and sticking by them!!
Not going to lie, I’m struggling with being single right now. It’s a foreign feeling for me because I’ve always been pretty content. I recently ended a situation where the guy was being hot and cold (he was a good person but had intimacy fears) and clearly it wasn’t going to go well down the road. Thank you for this video. It’s reminded me that I don’t need to settle for a not so great situation because I’m lonely.
Hey there, how are you doing, I know how it feels to get heartbroken
If you need hlp, to get back your ex I know of someone who can help you, fix your broken relationship reunite with your soulmate including saving your marriage from divorce
*Wha ts a pp* him right away for help
±19515998468⏯️⏯️⏯️⏯️ Hello it's works i can't believe i am with my lover back after many years of break-up.,...
Guuuuuurrrrl, you oughta write a book because this content is rich in wisdom to us ladies.. 😍❤️🙏
!!!!!! As soon as I got the notification I came to class 📝
Sis came through with another one, now I need to grab me a seat 💺
While we have been in a 3 month relationship (good at first then it got weird) I come to realization that i have been settling 😔. Going out of my way to do too much. No effort on his part. Making excuses for his actions too much justification. I made him a priority and he made me an option I thought he would change by letting him see how hard I was going for him. Welp!!! Im done as of today nothing has changed. Thanks Breeny💕✨ loving your UA-cam content
Sis… the ick factor is a HUGE red flag 🚩. You made a great point on that
First sign. Your not happy. Never make anyone a Priority who treats you like an Option #mayaangelou Breeny your a GORGEOUS Entrepreneurs and deserve a High Value Man who ADORES you!! 💞
Fuck, 9 out of 10 of these were spot on. I honestly need to break things off. I’ve been feeling like this for 6 months now 😔
"Don't be so concerned about being chosen that you forget to chose"... whewww, I needed that... thank you
For me I think when I knew I was sacrificing my career goals to please him, huge red flag. Sometimes I felt like I was doing the right thing, but in reality it was a disservice to myself.
Your such a fabulous teacher. Your such a life savor
Just stepping on my neck as soon as I open the video! lawd
Totally agree however I think this applies best to someone who is emotionally mature. Abandonment trauma will disguise itself as convincing yourself that you’re settling as a form of self-sabotage. There are AMAZING people out there getting left by people they have actually settled for, because their partners have abandonment trauma that completely turns them off to amazing people haha
In another note, the fear of just feeling empty if someone leaves is a big thing too. It prevents people from leaving unhealthy relationship where they aren't happy.
Wow think you for clarifying
That ambitious part hit a nail on the head man. Like when a person is a dark cloud over your thoughts.
I always check the playback speed to see if it’s normal cus the way you speak sounds fast like you’re rapping. Always spitting some hot🥵 fire🔥 knowledge!🤣♥️✨
Stupidly my biggest fear is seeing him with someone else because I’m attached in all honestly I want him for myself but I know I deserve better
UPDATE! GOT TIRED OF HIS CRAAAAAAAP AND LEFT
Just blocked someone for telling me to “carry on” after only getting to know each other for a week because he was ignoring me so i ignored him back… then he sent me sex videos on Twitter so I blocked his number & on Twitter. We are not settling on our standards. No thank u!!
I relate but mine was after a month
Omg he did what 🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️🤦🏾♀️
What does carry on mean
I needed this so badly, thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️
Im in a relationship but this put a lot of insight into the beginning of our relationship, especially the analogy of the interview.
You are spot on the last guy definitely made me felt all of this
Sexual needs being compromised are important too, and u shouldn’t settle for a man that doesn’t fully sexually fulfill you then you shouldn’t ignore that either.
Exactly
That’s the problem, y’all think if the man is good in bed then he’s a good man . NO he has to be good in every area . Sex is a PLUS not a priority. This is why y’all settle .
Well some people wait until marriage to have sex. So there is no pre testing 😂
@@Sandrinarhonda I see sex as a bid for connection. When I am turned down constantly, then that is a problem. He only wanted to fulfill me sexually when I decide to leave. I never felt the connection with him though. Sex is more than just sex to some people. That's my perspective.
I do agree with you because for a long time Men have gotten away with the idea that their sexual satisfaction is more important. However, I don't think this is a deal-breaker. Women can teach their men how to satisfy them. Many women are too scared to tell men exactly what they want in the bedroom and this is something we have to do away with. Its starts with her. If he outright refuses then he should be gotten rid of. But saying that a woman shouldn't settle for a man who doesn't satisfy her sexually is like saying men shouldn't settle for women who don't satisfy them and both of them are just icky.
First of all, I’m always gonna be the one doing the choosing 😌. I’ll always make them think they chose me! Ladies we are the ones who get to accept ❤️ remember you set the standard.
Love,
Desarae ✨
You're so misguided.
It has nothing to do with who is doing the choosing, that is your ego talking.
👏🏼👏🏼🎯 I wish other women understood this
@@firecast3321 it’s ultimately women’s responsibility to choose. As the beings who bring forth life, we must select very carefully the quality of which males’ essence we allow to be reproduced into further existence. We are the natural receivers spiritually and physically
Hahahahahha sis why are you in my life like this … are you watching me from over the street somewhere 🙆🏽♀️🙆🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️🤦🏽♀️😆😆🤣🤣😆 thank you so much I needed this . Keep them coming black Queen
Heyy! I’ve never been this early, Breeny you look gorgeous in that pink 😍
Breeeennyy.. Slap Weh!!!
U Fully hit the nail on the head with this one B.. 😂🤣😂😂.. It’s True to the T...
Nuff love ❤️.. You look gorge btw💯🙌🏾❤️
Daamn! This is literally the story of my life! Just like you said, I was so concerned about being chosen and forgot I needed to choose as well.. This is very well articulated and I felt like you had been peeping into my life to make this video lol. I think you should do another video for steps to follow after you realize you settled for less. And also reasons why people settle for less
Everything she said is me. The problem is that its difficult to leave. I find myself falling back. I totally hate it and cant wait to go to a new country to stay away from him. Its very difficult but i guess thats what it takes to find long lasting happiness.
everything you've just said was SO my attitude towards my dirty stankin' ex 💩 it took the nice guy I've got now to realise what a hot mess I used to be in!! lol
just found your channel and only watched 2 vids, i already am so appreciative of your knowledge its feels sooo good to know you put such EMPOWERING content out to us free alot of people can do alot watching your channel, thank you breenyyy!!
I feel attacked! I’ve definitely experienced this. 😂
I don’t like dating guys whom own much more than I do. This often creates toxicity around sooner or later. Can’t imagine a break up after living with someone in their house. What then? Absolutely not an option for me. Having things on my own gives me confidence and power to be with someone that is reaching my standards, I won’t ever be settling because I require never less than what I bring to the table.
Hello friend, sorry for interrupting your comment looks interesting, I try recommending you to Dr James helped me attract my sp and restored my love back to me..
Send him a message on WhatsApp.
±13126310783⏯⏯❣️❣️
I hope you see this! you should touch on fear of intimacy, I'm dealing with it & would love to hear your advice on it. I love your content by the way, youre saving me.
Wow...this is a video i never thought i needed...essentially when u used the HR language amd i work in HR...it made soooo much sense
I am at a point were I have to accept that no matter what he is who he been showing me. It was hard but I am doing fine now. I just know we falling apart and there is nothing or no one that will save the relationship. And the fact that all those points perfectly fit me
Me, married with children.. ticking all 10. I'm really sad rn
the pink jacket is so pretty blesssssssss
I have never been in a great relationship. I settled for someone who was inconsistent didn’t really communicate with me on a daily basis. Didn’t call much wanted to always text. Plus he didn’t Allow me to speak about my feelings he just brushed them under the rug. Anytime I would speak up for myself he saw it as me being mean. Which I wasn’t. He didn’t want me to complain. I can’t be with a man who wants me to be quiet all the time. And not speak up for myself. He kept a lot of things from me. He really didn’t want to open up. I don’t trust somebody like that at all. I really lost myself and my self worth I felt like I wasn’t good enough or pretty enough. As of now I don’t think I want to date or even get married. Because I never met a man who is able to meet my standards at all.
Did we date the same exact guy?! Day 2 of the breakup. I literally told him every time i speak on how hes emotionally neglecting me and I'm hurt he'd say I'm so mean and roasting him. Not once did he ask how he hurt me and let's fix this no, he just wants a mannequin. Someone without needs, opinions, or ambition.
@@333lavender no we didn’t date the same guy I don’t know you sis.
@kayla hood wasn't literal. Just same M.O
@@333lavender got it sorry for jumping into conclusion.
Breeny is literally my online big sister
Last night as we were out to dinner I definitely felt the “ick”!
I had missed you girl
On a related note: I have noticed that it is common practice for people to take up dating a person "in the meantime". As in, finding a person who is just okay enough (they may not have anything in common or even really like each other) and engaging in a relationship with them out of sheer boredom. I have always thought this was ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS. I cannot bring myself to simply tolerate a person who holds such an intimate place in my life. I've gotta be all the way for a person. Not 20%, not 70%, not 92%. I will stay by myself until I can get with somebody all the way, because I can't imagine being 'occupied' when my blessing comes along. Oh no ma'am. Can't play myself like that.
Then you're stuck with somebody and missing out on the right one for you.
you are the sister,mother and friend that every girl needs god bless you
Yes, I see my deal breakers. Omg, he wants me to accept him as he is. I am okay with walking away. I can’t accept it. Your video resonates with me so much. Thank you!!
So how did you even start dating him "as he is" in the first place?
Thank you for this. I knew deep down inside that my partner (now ex) and I are incompatible, but I just didn't have the courage to leave. I'm single again and I'm already so much happier
I always felt guilty for wanting a successful man....i was told every successful.man has a woman behind it... I always felt that i should settle down with anyone in future
Am also working hard😄
Am glad am hearing this video when am 21
I avoided watching your post break up vids because i know that i prob need to hear all of this 🥴 proud of you though queen 🤍
Sister, a little off topic - this Pink!
Yeasss. Insightful video by the way 📹👌💙
You are so right ! You should never settle. I'm just sorry I didn't get to hear this before I got into a relationship and then marriage, where I know I just settled and it wasn't the right fit....
you're so on point EVERY TIME. the pity thing....oof girl you got me
Wow this is such a good video! I'm currently dating someone and as soon as I started watching, I knew that I've been settling. What really did it was when you said you pity him. I literally have continued to date him because I simply don't want to hurt his feelings and tell him that he's not my person. It makes me feel like shit.
I just clicked. I wanted to say thank you for doing what you do, guiding us and being so candid and vulnerable in your story. You are appreciated.
I hope you are doing well 💕
Oh gosh! I once settled for less😭
You learn something new everyday
This is so good. He’s such a good man! He’s been so kind, sweet, unconditionally loving, loyal, etc. But I often feel like I could be settling. I have a wondering eye when we’re out. Because I feel more like his best friend, and not his lover. I don’t feel physically attracted to him…. I feel guilty for this of course. He is an amazing partner and person. He just lacks romance. And I want the sparks/ fireworks/ romance. He can’t give me that. He’s also not financially stable enough for me and what I want. I do sometimes feel the ick around him. He’s messy and has ADD and forgets stuff all the time! He does annoy me often and I catch myself wanting to change him. I don’t get excited to text or call him….. it just feels boring. We’ve been dating a year in November and I think it’s time I move on. I just need the courage to. ❤️🥺
In this exact situation right now. He's kind and caring and loyal, but the chemistry and romance just isn't there. We just talked about it the other day (because it's been literal weeks since we've touched or kissed) and he's been feeling the distance too. He tells me he loves me and wants the relationship to work, but he also acknowledges that it isn't and just wants me to be happy. I'm so torn because I feel I'll never find anyone with his good qualities who also makes me feel that romantic passionate love.
Oh this is so good to also test to see if you’re not settling. Thanks as always Breeny ❤️
I relate to, not all, but most of these. Like she said, my BF checks most of my boxes but is missing some. I got emotionally attached because I’ve always sorta had low self esteem. Not because anyone told me so but just from life in general. Now it’s hard to leave because I’ve put so much into the relationship already. I didn’t want to admit that I feel like I’m settling in certain aspects of the relationship, but this video kind of opened my eyes a bit more.
Breeny always come with the 🔥🔥🔥.. and right on time, thanks girl 😘
Everyone have a choice, outside been choosing, you need to also make your own choice too. Abi if mad person choose you, you go just agreed.
*likes video before even watching*
You don’t respect him and you’re embarrassed of him. THAT HIT HOME!!!