@@spicybrown75 I would counter that by asking what is the point of the relationship if the only thing keeping you together is the sex? Open relationships and non-monogamy are certainly not for everyone, but they absolutely provide clarity with what your romantic partner actually means to you, because tbh it seems like a lot of monogamous relationships are hanging by a thread and that thread is just sex, they're together because they're horny and hot for each other and that's it. I'm with my partner not because he's good in bed but because I value his companionship as a person irrespective of what our sex life looks like, the only thing that matters anymore is who he is as a person and no amount of good dick either of us get outside the relationship is going to change that, it's still very much a commitment just to each other as people.
@@SaltareObscurum everyone in new york is angry and miserable and highly strung all the time and people in atlanta are about as chill as you're gonna find in a city of that size.
These days Matteo giving advice bits are just the best thing to witness! I can't get enough of it, I can watch an entire special show just of him giving advice 😂
I think this should be a permanent bit in his set xD. It's so good. I've been following some comics and this bit is unique. All the other audience interactions are just random observational ones.
The thought of Matteo serenading me while he limp noodles but also hits those high notes and whisper tones...In this economy, that's a quality hook-up. 😂 Thanks for another one, love you! 💗✨
It’s really helpful with crowd work videos when comics add captions that pop up in sync with the audience member as they talk, just bc it’s usually hard to make out at least half of what’s being said, and I know Matteo is being hilarious but I’d like to know _how_ it’s happening (s’il vous plaît!) 😘
This is working so well. Love the format. And, Matteo, you've always been hilarious, but you're only getting sharper and faster. Please keep this as a regular series. It's guaranteed half million views per. Hope to see you in Toronto someday.
Omg... Half lesbian. That was so funny! I once asked a married lesbian friend what do lesbians bring on a first date? A U-Haul. She laughed and asked how i knew that "wife" and her only went on one date before they got married.
Matteo, Matteo, Matteo -- I recently moved from the San Francisco Bay Area to Wellington, New Zealand. Stop a moment to take that in. Yeah. Okay. Please come here -- soon. This country needs you. I need you!
I gotta get there someday, you'd love the story of my date on Valentine's Day, only I didn't realize it was Valentine's, and had no idea she thought it was a date until she showed up lol
“When you said you were bi you didn’t mean half gay half lesbian” sent me 😂
That was easily the funniest part half the people didn't get.
@@nodnarbeht9505 yeah I didn't get it hahahah
@@PascalPimpare lesbians stay in relationships a lot faster then most other people... from what i know
@@PascalPimpare It's a stereotype that lesbians get serious in relationships very fast
took me a second but i am deCEASED
You can see the respect in Matteo's eyes die when the guy recommended keeping the relationship open.
I mean, the guy spilled though. Most people I know in open relationships, they've lasted for very long
@@friedcatfood Yep. The longest-lasting male couples I know are open. We're talking decades.
Then what's the point of being in a "committed" relationship?
@@spicybrown75 I would counter that by asking what is the point of the relationship if the only thing keeping you together is the sex? Open relationships and non-monogamy are certainly not for everyone, but they absolutely provide clarity with what your romantic partner actually means to you, because tbh it seems like a lot of monogamous relationships are hanging by a thread and that thread is just sex, they're together because they're horny and hot for each other and that's it. I'm with my partner not because he's good in bed but because I value his companionship as a person irrespective of what our sex life looks like, the only thing that matters anymore is who he is as a person and no amount of good dick either of us get outside the relationship is going to change that, it's still very much a commitment just to each other as people.
@@spicybrown75 This comment implies that the only worthwhile thing you see in a relationship is sex, and I feel sorry for any partners you may have.
"Your shirt's very straight but your hat is like f***g" What a read 😂
this guy is the funniest comedian out there.....SUPER UNDERRATED!!!
Well im german and the weird beard.. Maybe thats why 😆😆😆😆
He’s definitely not underrated. He’s very well known and extremely popular 😃✨🌹
@@LuisaD93 not in mainstream culture. In the LGBTQIA community he's quite well known & popular though.
@@LuisaD93 only in queer circles
"How to have a good date in New York? You have to move back to Atlanta." 💀
As a European thats like „if you live in X then Y“ i have no clue about the stereotyps of American Citys but everybody laughs so i laugh too 😆😆😆
Amen!!! 😂
@@SaltareObscurum everyone in new york is angry and miserable and highly strung all the time and people in atlanta are about as chill as you're gonna find in a city of that size.
@methyod Everyone in Atlanta is fat and slow.
@@methyod THIS
These days Matteo giving advice bits are just the best thing to witness! I can't get enough of it, I can watch an entire special show just of him giving advice 😂
Boy do I have news for you
@@TheBestPizzaConnoisseur for real?
Good thing that he has one xD
@@jesipohl6717 Yeah he has one, I think it's just called 'Mateo Lane: the advice special'
But we need so much more!!! Needs a residency somewhere or a live talk show. WE LOVE YOU Matteo!!!!
Matteo needs a talk show helping people called “ Straight Talk with Matteo”
I think this should be a permanent bit in his set xD. It's so good. I've been following some comics and this bit is unique. All the other audience interactions are just random observational ones.
The thought of Matteo serenading me while he limp noodles but also hits those high notes and whisper tones...In this economy, that's a quality hook-up. 😂 Thanks for another one, love you! 💗✨
You’re the only one who made me laugh this entire week
As a bi guy...I felt that half lesbian thing. Like "wait, someone cute wants to see me twice AND THEY know about and accept my sexuality...?!
You gotta get with a bi woman.
Why are you dating straight women? I’d still go out of my way to date queer people if I were you.
@@Cyanopteryx Agreed! Bi women exist, and they're FABULOUS.
I feel that in my soul lmao
I'm a guy bi top too
i don't need a therapist when i literally have matteo lane giving me free life changing advice out here 😌
His straight voice killed me 😂
“I wish this never happened” 💀
Please post more of your stand ups, you make my life
my man crowd work is where you shine and sparkle, I cannot get enough!
I love that no advice was given hahaha it was essentially a roast !! 😂😂
wow, Matteo's 'straight voice' is SO hilarious! LOLOL
*YEAH*
I love Matteo sooooo much! He’s so funny and brutally honest
It’s really helpful with crowd work videos when comics add captions that pop up in sync with the audience member as they talk, just bc it’s usually hard to make out at least half of what’s being said, and I know Matteo is being hilarious but I’d like to know _how_ it’s happening (s’il vous plaît!) 😘
They actually did this for his previous advice video, but not this one. I'm a bit disappointed haha, couldn't hear anything towards the end
@@MayuraVyamsaka same :(
Matteo is awesome. Love the comedy and how well he interacts with the audience.
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HAVE MORE FULL SPECIALS!!!! They are my favorite!!!!!
You’re in luck!
Joan looks down with gratitude at Matteo...love him .....
His crowd work is fantastic.
To comedian: We met in a bathhouse. To parents: We met on a blind date.
This guy is going places! The advice stuff is hilarious
This is working so well. Love the format. And, Matteo, you've always been hilarious, but you're only getting sharper and faster. Please keep this as a regular series. It's guaranteed half million views per. Hope to see you in Toronto someday.
I watch this guys material over and over again and I still laugh every time! His delivery is superb ♥️👍
That first question was probably as if a pick-me moment and a humble brag had a baby.
FUCK YESSS MORE ADVICE
We need more of this, pls❗❤️
"I wish this never happened"
im so glad i accdently found you on youtube! haven't laughed so much with stand up comedy for a long time! great job!
Yaaaas more advice! This needs to be a regular thing! Some comedians roast, Matteo is so helpful and gives advice ❤️😋
Omg... Half lesbian. That was so funny!
I once asked a married lesbian friend what do lesbians bring on a first date? A U-Haul. She laughed and asked how i knew that "wife" and her only went on one date before they got married.
I always heard it as "What does a lesbian bring to a third date? A U-Haul. What's a gay guy bring to a third date? .... What's a 'third date?' "
6:15 he is absolutely right
That's the most solid advice he's given lol
his arms are amazing
I promise you he's not doing anything crazy, you could get those with two sessions a week on a calorie deficit.
@@thatguyyousawthatonetime 😳 stop it with “calorie deficits” That’s fancy diet culture talk for “st@rve”
Ick
@@idislikemacaroni Let me guess, you’re “bOdY pOSiTiVe”?
Okay but now I need an actual cover of We Belong Together by Matteo plz
I LOVE THIS SO MUCH OMG PLS COME TO TORONTO
He was there in February!
Need more of this !!!
Mark and Brooke should give it a shot if only because their couple name would be Brookemark.
Or Mooke.
Or Brark.
I liked that he first asked for Mariah's song My All because that's a great song not many people know about
can’t wait for you next special!
You stuff popped up in my shorts and I really like your comedy!
Living for the Steamworks reference!
I love these so much😂
your straight voice is killing me
"YEAH" AHAHAHAHA!
Oh my God I love him he's so funny 😂😂😂
This was great! Super talented
I’ve missed your standup so much
These are the best videos
I just saw you on Growing Up Italian and I liked who I saw so I am now following you👍🏽 and you are funny💯🥰
Man Matteo just comes up with this stuff it’s like Peter Cullen and frank welker had a son!
His straight guy voice hahaha
I just had the duolingo add 😂😂😂
Matteo's straight impression is almost cursed
I wish me and Mateo were friends! 😂❤
Matteo, Matteo, Matteo -- I recently moved from the San Francisco Bay Area to Wellington, New Zealand. Stop a moment to take that in. Yeah. Okay. Please come here -- soon. This country needs you. I need you!
Very entertaining ❣️ MATEO has what it takes ❣️
for the second gowrl i did not hear "...wants to be best friends"
i heard "wants to be breast fed"
*Your shirt says straight and your hat says ***” 😂
funniest thing to hear about this is that Matteo is officially older than my dad
2:24 LOL
Love the Steamworks in Berkeley, California
Pollentastic😂 name the bag opal.
Just saw you last night in Tampa and had the best time. Love you!
This isn't advice. This is just an excuse to do crowdwork for seven minutes.
And I'm here for it.
Just give yourself the excuse to sing bro, we can tell you wanna 😂
Omg that straight voice is terrifying! 😮
So funny!
Matteo gives good....advice.
I gotta get there someday, you'd love the story of my date on Valentine's Day, only I didn't realize it was Valentine's, and had no idea she thought it was a date until she showed up lol
Love you SO much!! 🤣💯💘🌈🌟🎉
Captions would help to make the audience speech clear 😢
Did anyone else hear homeless pimp laughing?
half lesbian 😭😭😭 too real
Matteo has the greatest impersonations... Embark on a voice acting career please!
Damn he doesn’t even look 30 at the slightest
Hell yeah for open relationships!
Come to SF!
Are you performing anywhere in NYC after your 5/19 tour date?
❤❤❤
As a straight woman, have to say you are the best Matteo, but I don't need another gay friend.
I've dated guys and I have dated girl's, I prefer women a lot more than men.
Also, I love Mateo his comedy is amazing 🌈🌈🌈🤩🤩🤩🌈🌈🌈🌈
What did Mark say at the end? Matteo didn’t repeat it for us. Did anyone catch it?
😂😂😂😂😂
Wow great voice
Why did it cut off awkwardly? He's so funny
I would really like a Matteo X Shane Gillis crossover 😂
Youre 3 6??? You look 30, we have another jerma985 lol!
❤
Lmfao
Picture of that bi guy please 😊
"Open your relationship " is very gay advice 🌈💗
polyamory has traumatized some of us
you can see the respect in Matteo's eyes die when the guy says it
Ohhh YOUR SINGING VOICE---YOU WERE JOKING ?....YOU'RE GOOD :) HOLY SHIT MATTEO ----AND YOU WERENT EVEN TRYING? :)
he is a professional opra
@@victoriazwergmaus9813 for real real ? ...
Come to Calgary :)
OMG YESSS SLAYYYY PERIOD
You are so funny, and so brilliant and so cute and so hot all at the same time!
What went with Carlos?