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Everything Wrong With 300: Rise of an Empire
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- Опубліковано 23 сер 2017
- Oh, god, my head hurts. This prequel-sequel-samequel is just as full of slow-motion as you expect, and just as devoid of actual story as well. It's a real crap-show.
Next week: Two 2017 movies.
Remember, no movie is without sin! Which movie's sins should we expose next?!
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I still feel robbed we never got that epic 10,000 Spartan charge promised at the end of the first movie, like common movie, you had one job
10000 Spartans? When? There were never that many of them in any single battle during the Persian wars that I remember of...
At the end of the first movie, after Gerard Butler died. Him dying allowed for the 10,000 Spartans to attack
@@mperformance3502 who's Gérard butler
That is the actor that played Leonides
ara xenophon and the anabasis
"This movie strokes Sparta so much I'm surprised the Mediterranean Sea didn't get pregnant." lol
i got the line in the video when i checked your comment lol
@@the_bane_of_all_anti_furry ^
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤷🏿♂️
🤣
Right as I read this that same part came up
Actually, many of spartan women were taught basic combat for the necessity of if their husband was off to war they could defend the home.
And Spartan Woman had the same rights as the men. Because Spartan Woman gave birth to Spartan men. And old Spartans who were 60+ were Treated extreamly well. Becuase they survived many battle's.
@Hoohoosistik thay also workout and had gym. Equality rights was resone of Spartan colaps against Teba because more woman got lands for their dead fathers and housband and that leave Sparta with less warrior because thay needed to have land, and do not have any ocupation like trade, farming....
Yeah these guys forgot to read or watch ancient Greek history. A few things on this made me cringe. But overall they were just talking shit about a shitty movie... all is forgiven
@Hoohoosistik
I know loads about Ancient Greek History but sources for information on Spartan life can be a little sparse compared to that of Athenian life as they weren't really writers and didn't really promote the skill so any writings about Sparta and Spartan life tends to be from people on the outside. For instance, Xenophon’s Constitution of the Lacedaemonians is a major source for Spartan history. Xenophon however was born in Athens but worked as a mercenary in Sparta. His work discussed many details about Spartan customs and practices.
Plutarch’s Life of Lycurgus is also a major source for information about Spartan history, particularly on Lycurgus (Spartan leader). He described the marriage ritual of Spartans as well as the eugenic policies Lycurgus enacted in the Spartan Constitution. These policies were believed to result in the strongest possible children and thus they would strengthen the Spartan military. Furthermore, Aristotle also wrote about the Spartans, while an Athenian citizen, he saw fall of Sparta within his lifetime. In his works he is one of the main sources on Sparta that survives today.
Now onto Spartan women, They where known to be beautiful, Helen of Troy for instance who has historically been described as the the most beautiful woman in the world at the time was a Spartan woman. While there is reason to doubt this claim, the reason that Spartan woman were so beautiful was because based on the sources above we know that the the Spartan exercise regimen for girls was designed to make them fit for motherhood, this is quite literally true. In his Constitution of the Spartans, Xenophon it is written that Lycurgus required that women should exercise just as much as men or be as fit as their brothers, and to this end instituted the same athletic competitions for women and men this includes activities such as throwing the javelin and discuss, running, boxing, and pankration (an early version of MMA that consisted of Boxing and Wrestling). So it wouldn't be a stretch to say that Spartan women where incredibly fit....
Furthermore Archidamia, wife of Spartan King Eudamidas I was strongly involved in the defence of Sparta in 272 BC from an attack from the state of Epirus. With the pending siege the Spartan Gerousia (Council of elders) planned to evacuate the women to Crete. However, Archidamia, speaking on behalf of the Spartan women, entered the Gerousia, and with sword in hand contested this proposal, questioning whether the Spartan women were "so faint hearted as to live after Sparta was destroyed". Famously she asked "Spartans! I ask, by the memory of your race, Are ye worthy of the name!" before ending her speech with "her women can die, and be free". With her speech given the Women of Sparta were given a role in defending the siege from the Epirus with the Spartan force consisting of around 2,000 Spartan boys and around 7,000 women.
Needless to say they where able to hold out defensively against the attacking force of around 27,000 until the main Spartan army arrived back from Crete where they had been campaigning at the time. Following the building of a series of defensive trenches which the women where involved in they where able to hold off the attacks until the reinforcements arrived. They where from there able to push them back and ultimately break the siege. This ended up leading the downfall of the state of Epirus who where later conquered by the Romans in 167 BC.
A great story that I am surprised hasn't been made into a movie to be honest...
@@lardonirdesco good read, I usually don't give these long comments much time. Thank you for the history
The circling ship formation is actually accurate, historically that is what Themistocles actually did during that battle.
But just because someone does something doesn't make it a good strategy or very smart for that matter I mean yeah it might be good for defense but not offence
You are wrong their hot warriors with speedos wish I lived in Sparta so many muscular hot shirtless guys with sheilds
@@CyberpunkEdgerunner513 they're*
@@blakeharris58 there what it got filterred out?
@@briang287 the best offense is a great defence
Girl: How tall r u?
Me: 0.1 Persian boatlengths
Girl: what?
cinemasins used "five persian boatlengths" as a unit of measurement for a giant wave during one of the naval battles
A Canadian French man, born and raised in New Bedford Ma, taught to understand the mathematical precision a machinist will never allow the FN metric system to get within one hundred miles from.
a trireme(persian boat) is 40 meters long
0.1 persian boatlengths would be 4 meters.
@Connor Scoles is 4 meter tall
Girl: what?
@@kerryyang9041 Well that is roughly 13 feet tall so I could understand her confusion.
are you*
Letters are not words, sir.
Biggest sin: that somehow, all those buff dudes were torso-hairless.
I would disagree. Almost all of ancient art in Greece portrayed people like that. Its not like they did not have skills to include body hair when they include head hair. They just chose not to. Sometimes they preferred it like that, and other times people really did shave all of their hair and wore wigs.
They were the inventors of Greco wrestling of course they were oiled up hairless jersey boys I mean come on everything about Sparta says the New Jersey of greece
Aww cmon man.... leave my home state alone.... haven't we apologized enough for the Jersey Shore? WE'RE SORRY!!! SOO SOOOO SORRY!!!
@@IamN0V0 lol I love jersey for the most part the state is really really nice it's just the Jersey shore area is infested or was infested with people who want nothing more than to be Guido's
Might not believe it but.... I've been here 28 years and have never seen a single Guido.... just gotta stay away from the shore I guess? Easy enough Jersey beaches suck balls....
Fun fact: Long after the war, Thermistocles later joined the Persian side and served under Xerxes' son Artaxerxes as a governor (satrap) of one of the provinces.
Really!?
I know right why isn’t the real story told in these films it’s so much more cool
@@cadenvanvalkenburg6718 Yes, really, he provoked Sparta by having Athens rebuild their fortifications, and his arrogance was the final nail in the proverbial coffin. He was ostracised (expelled from the city) and after the Spartans involved him in a plot to betray the Greeks, put together by one of their own generals, he went to Macedonia. Then he found a place in the court of King Artaxerxes (after sneaking to the court in the same wagon in which the King's concubines were traveling), who gave him the province of Magnesia to rule. He served the Persian King until his death, some 10 years later.
Yo bro stop playin...
@@cadenvanvalkenburg6718 yep! You can learn more by reading up on him. But we all know Hollywood ain't gon tell the truth tho.
"This horse is f***ing magic!"
Dead, I lol'd.
It's roach
Not everyone knows that the spartans are dark souls players that wear no clothing for speed.
Praise The Sun
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Praise The Sun
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@@howshouldiknow2568 who decided that?
They were a hoplite army. They had armour, look them up, its why they were so effective against the immortals.
@@peterlonergan ok
"glabrous and smooth"
translates to- "smooth and smooth"
SuperGlueization That’s a sin in itself. Lol
Oh how I love Hollywood scripts. Using big words doesn't make you seem smarter if the sentence makes you look really really dumb.
Well actually it's "Hairless and smooth and smooth" but still pretty bad.
Hahah i had to google glabrous but it is basically a fancy word for extra smooooth. Its the equivalent of ATM machine.
SuperGlueization *
they make those Persian "immortals" seem so bad ass in the first movie, in this one they're just fodder
They always were just fodder. The reason they were called the Immortals was because it was said that no matter how many were killed, an equal or greater number would replace them.
Kinda making it seem like they are neverending
Pretty neat
@@matthiasthulman4058 That is false, though you might have heard it somewhere. They were professional soldiers of the Persian Empire, the rest were levies (as in, not professionals, just recruited for the war and will go home after). The Persian immortals were soldiers just as good as hellenic hoplites.
The idea that the Spartans or Greeks in general were better soldiers is false. Spartans were not even the best hoplites, those were from Argos. The persians actualy whooped their ass the whole war, completed 7/8 main objectives and only lost at the end because of some major bullshit coming their way, like several storms that wrecked half their shit.
@@matthiasthulman4058 They were never fodder in the first movie. If you think so then you're dumb and don't know what fodder is.
@@jovanleon7 I know that now, if done some research after the other comment left for me. But thank you anyway
@@jovanleon7 then why did they get clobbered by the Spartans
Most important sin of this movie is that it's a complete shamefull historic lie.
im glad im not the only one who knows this👍
can u elaborate a bit? ion know nothin of greek history
@@Rahul-ru7jv Spartans were never "300", couple others joined them (they started with around 1k, certain sources have stated they're numbers were risen to 10k'ish). Xerxes was never a "god-king", he was just a ruler and was a respected/loved one. Themistocles army is, and 70-80% of the greek army are literal slaves rather than trained/brave men wanting to fight. Persians are the good guys of the story; they care about equality (specifically women rights), abolished slavery and were ethical compared to Greeks. Greek empire is known to be one of the most brutal empire, raping and killing for the joy once they've won battles showing very minimal mercy, while they've been portrayed to be "defenders" of their land throughout these 2 movies. And "there is democracy/equality under Greek ruling" theme that this movie has is complete bs; Athens was the only state that resembled democracy (monarchy all around Greek alliances/states), women were never given rights (including Athens), and slavery was welcomed in Greek (unlike in Xerxes's Persian ruling).
@@bupsmertozkal except the Spartans had more female rights than rest of Greece but yeah the rest is right
@@bupsmertozkal Basically 100% correct, but also not really a 'historic lie' (well unless someone is silly enough to take it as fact), since as it's presented, its basically a storyteller coming up with a ridiculously blown out version of what happened. As a fun addition though, as I recall, Athens was also fairly famous for its pederasty.
These masked guards had me dying
"We are not paid enough for that."
“I’m not changing the diapers when that thing comes out”
“”Mortal enemies” my godly glabrous ass”
its like the first order troopers from the force awakens
donkeykong 64 2
True. These guys are so done with their superiors it’s hilarious.
16:22 Fun fact: This horse was actually ripped straight out of Skyrim.
1:27 he took his helmet off because his helmet blocked his sight Im pretty sure we had that line from the nerrator in the first movie, when Leonidas throws the spear at Xerxes.
I was thinking that too but all the other times, it was compeltly pointless
Gorgo:"....and this is how it all happened folks and I was there leading the entire Greek fleet and kicking some Persian @@s without wearing any actual armor or carrying a shield to protect myself just the sword of my fallen husband......true story!"
Herodotus: "Alright my dear you've entertained this crowd enough let me tell them the actual story"
The quote by Artemisia: " You fight harder than u fuck " should have lessen the sins
That'll probably qualify as a "Hahaha..." sin
11:15 maybe the huge moon created the giant tidal wave from earlier
smart
NERD!
NERD!!!
Speech 100
@@electriczap9615 Smart 100
The confusing timeline (I think) is their attempt to tell the true part of the original tale of the 300 - that the Spartan mission was simply to slow down the Persians so that Greece could consolidate their forces and have a fighting chance. Most historians agree that Leonidas probably did not plan to sacrifice his men, but betrayal and poor support put him in that position. At least that's what the history books say. But there's nothing in those history books about Goat-Headed men and magical gods either, so who knows.
Not only were the Spartans the most armored Greeks, one was even fined for going into battle without armor. I've had people argue that they didn't wear armor just because they saw it in these movies lol
25 second and this movie got 102 sins
StrawhatPrime I guess that this should say something about the movie's quality.
Dark Star it doesn't say Shit
StrawhatPrime The CGI is just so fucking garbage
100 for the slow motion decapitation 😂😂
@Dark Star
If you think sin count is actually there to say something about movie's quality - and you consider this channel as valid critique and not nitpicking for the sake of laughs - then you're delusional as fuck.
So...Xerxes dips into magical water and becomes a god -- that can still bleed, apparently. So is he a god or isn't he? The first movie didn't have any of this mystical crap woven into it.
Because, as mentioned, it was based on an unreleased graphic novel "Xerxes."
Hmm, I can see why they didn't release it, lol.
jessewam I believe Gods can bleed in ancient Greece, in the Iliad Ares himself gets stabbed by a Greek warrior, causing him to go home crying to Zeus
jessewam If a "Divine person" bleeds then he is only a human.
Tom Sistermans Greek Gods bleed Ichor I think.
Y'know, it's interesting that they only ever mention Leonidas as king of Sparta. Sparta was rather unique in Greek history for being a diarchy. That is, having 2 kings at once. There was STILL a king in Sparta named Leotychidas who Themistocles should have been speaking to instead of Gorgo. Same guy who should have been leading the Spartan forces after Leonidas' death instead of either one eye, or Gorgo.
Also, Sparta didn't actually have a Navy. They relied on their allies for Naval battles. So all those ships flying the Spartan sail at the end should really be flying a Corinthian sail or that of one of the other city-states. Sparta itself contributed maybe 20 ships to the war. And the overall commander since the other city states didn't want an Athenian like Themistocles leading the navy.
Then there's the issue of hair. I'm not talking about how everyone's waxed. That actually makes sense as ancient Greeks considered body hair gross. Just look at any statue or pottery art from them. No, I'm talking about beards. Specifically the lack of them on many of the men seen. Beards were considered supremely manly. Every adult male would have a beard lest they be seen as feminine and mocked by their peers.
Thank you for this comment, I studied classics and I can’t help but be hurt by this film
Thank you for this, it showed me the ignorance and focus for blood by the directors
Thanks for pointing out these interesting factoids! No one in their right mind would attribute any ounce of historical accuracy to this very stylish movie. Oh, and did you know that Equestria has been a diarchy, as well?
Hell also them going into battle half naked....thats ridic...its well known they wore armor.
for untrained men they fought damn well and looked rather trained.
Really enjoyed this sin. "This horse is F*&king magic" lol
it's the ancestor of the bf1 horse
That was awesome CGI!!!.
i mean to be fair to the movie this was a time where they believed and worshiped gods and horses were thought to be the creation of water so that WOULD negate the sin if not for all that god damn slow mo
I was thinking "How the fuck has this horse not kicked you off and ran away"
Love this video, but you forgot the sin of the movie making xerxes into a literal god or superhuman or whatever when the whole point of the spear throw at the end of the first movie was to prove that xerxes was nothing but a man. They completely screwed that up in this movie.
one could argue that the spear trow was to show that even has a god he could bleed
Before that battle he said something a long the lines of. “Even a god king can bleed”
But that objective failed in the first movie.
@@datedboi_2176 True story: back before this movie came out, I saw a random teaser trailer for it, and had a brief moment of hope that the title "Rise of an Empire" meant that this would be a *prequel* focusing on the careers of Cyrus the Great, Cambyses and Darius (the founder of the Persian Empire, the Shah who conquered Egypt, and the man who ordered the Battle at Marathon, respectively), focusing on how the Persians start out just as rugged and manly as the Spartans we saw in the first 300, and then watching as the successive kings become more decadent/arrogant/inhuman as time goes on via timeskips, eventually culminating in weird-bald-jewelry-man Xerxes. Because Herodotus (our main source for this period) makes *very* clear efforts to parallel the virtues of the early Persians that won them their empire with early Greeks, before getting into the whole "Persian Wars" part of the narrative.
At least then the movie would've had *some* kind of depth to it, and would've been an interesting contrast to the Philhellene masturbation that was the first 300 :).
Does no know understand that the first part of the movie is a flash back??? In the first movie Leo says hed prove he isnt a God in this movie it explains why xerxes thinks hes a god...
16:58 According to history, women of Sparta actually receive the same training as men do so that they can serve as the last line of defense.
Book "Gates of Fire" says you are right, read it, it's what inspired first movie
Thats not true they received training in cooking and dancing and weaving and some physical training not battling
No they didn't
Bull shit.
Yes spartan women were trained how to fight, especially in case if Queen gorgo she was pretty much one of the best fighters in history
1:24 when that dude takes his helmet off it bends like it's made of rubber, because it probably is lol. Bad props are bad.
Guys, CinemaSins STILL can not legally review the Emoji Movie, so please, for heavens sake, stop asking.
Then when?
Matt Smith wait why can't they?
theplourde Because it's not on Blu-ray/Digital formats yet. If they did it now, they could only use material from trailers and clips officially released.
Timppa 3 there is still plenty to sin in the trailers alone
nobody is asking for it though
is there a award for least historically accurate movie?
I agree it was kinda inaccurate but it was still frickin awesome
Kindda inaccurate?? You must be a 5 year old or live under the rock. The story is shit and the movies is shit too.
Instead of waterboarding the Taliban, make them watch this movie instead!
It's hardly "the least" historically accurate movie. Sure it has a lot of flaws... a LOT of flaws.. and I mean... A LOT, but not the most.
what are you talking about, i thought this was a documentary
"We wont be needing this anymore" 😂
My favorite sin
@@ellervercingetorix9343 😂😂😂😂
9:22 "my...disappointment..."
Is immeasurable. And my day is ruined.
These movies pissed me off because the Producers and costume designers thought that some dudes with abs would look cooler or better than actual Spartan Armor. Like, have you seen that shit? Its already got abs! They would look way more bad ass if they were wearing armor rather than just being a bunch of shirtless dudes. Kinda gives off a gay vibe
On what exactly do you base that opinion ? I would like to know your souces...
Ηλιας Μιμιλιδης a lot of them were bisexual
Christ McCart As a bi man, I can say these 300 movies are so deep in the closet they might as well take place in Narnia.
Aleksandr Bukhvostov dude, Saying something like that requires some proof to prove your point. You and the other guy just made half the acnient Greek population be gay or bi from nowhere. Do not have anything against by or gay people but your oponions/"facts" do not seem that logical or real.
What pisses me off are all the heteros in the world who are catered to so STAGGERINGLY much, that whenever something doesn't have a million boobs in it, or shows men that aren't 100% clothed, then it must be gay.
My 300 name is "Testeclees" or "Scrotumias"
A E ha ha ha
A E what
"The century"? Genital jokes are timeless.
LADY: I hope this reason stands for my excuse.
BEGGAR: I, it stands so that I may hardly tarry so long.
-Taming of the Shrew
Hi I'm here to steal your joke.
You sure it isn't obesitees?
I love how the Immortals are such badasses in the first movie, yet they all die like bitches in this movie.
They still died like bitches in the first one too, all baddassery aside.
Welcome to Hollywood dude. everything could happen here😁
Have you Ever looked at a comment and said “man I wish I commented that”
Man I wish I had commented this ...
Ding x 1000 "Persian where annoyed of the Greek freedom" - Greeks had slaves while in Persia slavery was abolished and woman had rights.
Freedom as in democracy. The Greeks didn't have to bend the knee to a "god king"
@@yoyo-lf3ld Xerxes never considered himself a god-king. And no other city state except Athens had democracy.
The Spartans had a monarchy. They did bow down to the king, just as every single monarchy did. Athens was the only exception.
Also, the best word tge writer found for this part was "annoyed". Not angered, feared, were furious of, threatened by...Something that sounds a bit more...ominous?
@@kobitadutta1642 actually... Sparta had two kings that were controlled by both ephors. They even had national assembly. So Spartan political system was a mixture of monarchy, oligarchy and democracy :)
@@yoyo-lf3ld And you've just shown how uncultured you are. Greek never had freedom, Persians had more "democracy" than any state but Athens. Greek ruling was literally a monarchy, never a democracy. Feel like you're an American that gets all their historical facts from movie, sad life.
"WHY DO SO MANY SHOTS IN THIS MOVIE HAVE HOVERING WHITE PARTICLES IN THEM?"
You're right, Jeremy. Also, this movie is basically about narration and slow motion...
The sea monsters might have been a dream by Themastaclees. It implies that there may have been prehistoric creatures in the sea at the time, which is kinda cool actually.
Has anyone figured out how long this movie would have been an actual time if there was no slow mo in it? I am genuinely curious
I wondered if some of the people out there watch it at the movies. This movie when it came out was promoted in 3D, so I remembered wearing 3D glasses. That's why there were tons of unnecessary particles, blood splatters, slow mo killings, etc.
@@horrorpill but that doesn't answer my question
@@lynnwest4307 well, it doesn't but does it matter. People will answer with a reason to your question or just say something that they wanted to say.
Guys stop asking for the emoji movie... You realize how sadistic you are? He would have to WATCH it!!
It's also not out on Digital yet.
Also, he would have to BUY the DVD to watch the movie.
dapperfalcon *as soon as he grabs the DVD his hands melt off
"Why do I do this again instead of working in a local McDonalds?"
dapperfalcon that's not necessarily ever heard of redbox?
mikpol And every second a sin would be added so yeah. There is no point.
They should have left the movie 300 alone. It didn't needed a sequel at all.
Js
as he said in the video if they dont make a new 300 movie every few years they loose the copyrights to it. hence how fox is pushing out craptastic xmen movies all the time. they really dont want to loose the franchise
Marcos Amparo what i dont understand why didnt they just make the sequel were the last film ended with 10000 spartans leading 20000 free greek men
This isn't a sequel so much as a parallel story that was happening while the battle for Thermopylae was going on.
they gonna make a 3rd movie i feel it in my bones
"These mask guard guys will be excellent ar cinema sins" got mo so hard😂
That's what got your hard, considering all the events... Really?
Soldier: so the battle started like 7 seconds ago?
Another soldier: yes, why
Soldier: *removes helmet* i dont like this shit
If it doesn't have 300 sins I'm gonna be mad
Edit: Thanks for 200+ likes
Dang it
Obi-wan Kenobi hello their
They messed up a perfectly good meme count lmao
ikr
if your comment doesn't get 300 likes i'm not gonna do anything but it'll be pretty cool
Actually it was very common for navy's not to know about local water ways or for weather patterns and tides. Ancient cultures would often disregard it or blame it on the gods
Your comment got me thinking about ancient navigation, and I found this article. I thought you might also find it interesting :)
J Meee send it
@@vampiraJ Yes, please. Link the article
@@vampiraJ damn, even after a year you never linked it 😔
"Who puts a throne on a Warship?"
*Warhammer 40,000 has entered the chat*
Add 300 sins for the fact that neither Xerxes nor Darius is historically accurate in this movie.
1. Athenian sailers weren't untrained.
2. Spartan women were tought how to fight.
3. This list doesn't matter because Comic Book.
@Khristophoros1001 ,
Right. "Not like the men," meaning they didn't go through the agoge (I probably spelled that wrong) and didn't go to war, but they were expected to be very physically fit and were taught how to defend their city while the army was away.
(Edit: It turnes out I actually spelled agoge correctly!)
@Khristophoros1001 ,
I couldn't remember the exact source so I did the minimal "research" of Googling it. A fairly well-sourced Wikipedia article states that they were taught riding, discus and javalin throwing as well as wrestling. The female Spartan citizens also led the defense of the city on at least one occation while the army was away. I think it would be more of a stretch to assume they didn't know how to use sword and spear than to assume they did. Remeber, female citizens were not busy doing all the domestic jobs that most Greek women saw as their duty because the Spartans had a huge slave population. They had a parallel course of education and public service as the men. I'm sorry for a lack of a specific ancient source but I am cursed with both a History degree and a very poor memory.
No its correct spelled by a greek :D
The entire modern view of Sparta is largely a myth. They didn't have a warrior culture that stood out especially compared to other Greek territories. A channel called Invicta has made an entire 20-minute video on the Spartan myth and the history of Sparta.
True...
This entire story sounds like something the Goa'uld dreamed up to keep their slaves and Jaffa in line. They found a Lazarus pit that gives them god like powers and immortality.
"300 : Rise of an Empire, its like Lion King 1 1/2 but makes even less sense, especially if you actually watched the first movie."
Shiirow I was honestly thinking about that. Like the sarcophagus they used to keep the host body alive that slowly made the symbiote insane. Stargate was the best show on tv
Shiirow Nice to see another Stargate fan here.
I have every episode on dvd lol
'Eyyyy, Stargate me boyo!
100 sins for Themistocles sounding like "Testicles".
Themistocles was a real person
You’re supposed to pronounce it like “The Mystical Ease” that’s nowhere near testicles
@@Thatexan44 isn't it "The-mist-oh-clease"?
There was a real guy named Testicles, but we don't talk about him... whit out being childish and giggeling. A wee bit like the montypyton sketch of ''Biggusdickuss'' .
17:23 That Basic Instinct reference 😂😂😂
Doing everything to avoid emoji movie eh?
To be fair you'd have to just play the whole film for the everything wrong with video
Not on DVD, nowhere to get the footage and stuff from in high quality
It's not easy to watch a trash movie like that chill on him
Adolf Hipster it is still in theaters
Being idiotic enough to not realised it hasn't been released to DVD, eh?
is this Sparta ?
Indeed this is Sparta.
Sparta this is... HMMMMMM!!!!!!
OsidO no, this is PATRICK
Noo. This IS SPARTA!
OsidO NOO This is Spartaaaaaaaaah
I'm halfway through the video and I'm calling it early: not enough sins for this turd masquerading as a movie.
I dont know who this guy talking is but his accent and the way he talks is funny and btw Great video keep up the great work 👍
1+Subscriber😉
Cinemasins complaining about sex scenes? what is this?
beatingstuff88 ikr? I thought a shitload of sins would be removed because of Eva Green's breasts
But he sins the lack of lap dances, not the lack of sex scenes, in other movies
Red Floyd dude...did you really just write all that on some rando's name? Don't you think it would be over the top if I started questioning you on why Floyd is suddenly red now instead of pink? Why you forced Floyd to be a communist and stripped all the implied pride that comes with being pink?
Or is that reading too much into it...
And he stopped doing the "scene does not contain a lapdance" sin a long time ago, as he's been getting a bit more PC in his videos.
beatingstuff88 he doesn't sin sex scenes they seem like they fit...this doesn't fit
"We'll tell this story for a thousand years, or else the rights go back to Marvel, somehow" killed me 😂
These movies are having more rousing speeches, slow motions, screaming and homoerotic scenes
Not even 30 second into it and already there's over 100 sins 😂
14:08 Whose scream was that? LOL. Perfect timing when he threw down that axe!
I think that was one of the crows in the background.
Everything wrong with the Bee Movie
Nothing, it is perfection
Jaydahn Belnavis that would be a short video cus nothings wrong with it
Jaydahn Belnavis ikr! It'd be a hell of a long video, which is more entertaining for me xD
I REALLY ENJOYED watching this and listening to your comments. Laughed so damn hard. 🤣
Man that outtake with the guy opening his legs and the cut to the scene from basic instinct was classic. Like if you knew it you knew it. Those are the jokes a fking love.
Women also trained in Sparta because they were the only ones left to defend the homeland
You have no evidence of this and this is incredibly unlikely that Sparta would send every man they have to where the population is 100% women and untrained boys.
Eredium Core I mean from what I remember from multiple history books that's what I saw the only people left in Sparta were women slaves and spartan men who were retired from the military because every male citizen was forced to fight in the military because Sparta was an oligarchy and military city state and yes women were trained from what I can tell in the movie the queen I highly doubt she would have been able to fight but besides that no need to be hostile
Eredium Core also look at other comments because they say that spartan women were trained in combat you black
Eredium Core never said it was rascist just like you said weak minded insult and I'm speaking what I remember I came here for entertainment then commented on a comments section if you say I don't have evidence sure I don't have I don't need evidence this isn't a freshmen year in cal poly where I'm making an essay on Karl marxs's communist manifesto of how the system is unjust and unfair to the working class also again nothing here makes me idiotic also not rascist I just don't give a shit if people think an insult is rascist
Spartan woman, had to breed the perfect soldier, this ment, they were not oppressed, they trained in combat gymnastics dancing, and gained a formal education, they werre equal to men in many ways. according to Homer(an ancient greek author) they were the most beautyfull woman on earth, Helen of Troy was born In Sparta.
Sparta's soldiers didnt see that much combat, but the woman were trained in combat, for the main reason that if the main army falls they could defend themselfs against the enemy's or the 100.000s of slaves they had.
100 sins in 30 seconds new record
watch "the room" i think that has the record
My favorite sins in this one are the "aaand I won't be needing this anymore". 😂
25 Sins for all these ships sailing so smoothly in such rough seas. The fishing must've been awesome! 🎣
Women in sparta was the last defense if the army fell so yes they trained women in fighting
There are a tons of sources since it is a rather well known fact. Examples are reports from greek biographers like plutarch or war reports like the siege of lacedeamon, where an army of spartan women defended the city against pyhrrus.
You're missing the point. While it's true that Spartan women were awesome and all that, they fail to show that in the movies. Hence the audience is clueless why she's now all of a sudden a war leader.
@@orarinnsnorrason4614 read the history you will find Athens had the navy not Sparta that fought the Persian fleet plus the 300 spartans at the gates was only a part of a 5000 strong force of forces sent from various Greek city states, thou Sparta did hold its ground till the end while many others withdrew . interestingly Athens women had more respect in its culture than there spartan counterparts who were expected to almost only produce strong sons in its upper class citizens, failure in this could be fatal. its lower class and slaves very little is known except that they had to provide and toil for there elite warrior peers
Them women didn't help King Agus II of the Spartans who lost against the Macedonians under Antipitor. One of Alexander's men
Dude, thank you for actually knowing your Greek history!
You guys should do everything wrong with Death Note
Pauly 2K yep
everything is wrong with that Death Note movie
That movie already ruined itself.
I actually threw up watching that movie because the way they fucked up almost every aspect of it made me sick to my stomach. The manga and anime are such masterpieces how can you fuck something that bad.
Calling the anime a masterpiece is a bit strong. It really fell apart of L died.
I find it funny that he dies from three arrows that in real life would be survivable.
"don't need THIS anymore" had me dying every time
6:17 - 6:27
In my opinion, the back story of how Eva Green's character being taken in and trained after being left for dead was the most interesting part of the movie. That probably could have been its own movie that should have been made instead of this movie.
Hell, looking at makes me wonder why I shouldn't hoped she'd suceed in beating the people who killed her family and sold her as a sex slave.
The "found while almost dead and trained to become really powerful" seems really fucking cliché to me
+Totally Not A Cylon
I wonder if it is more so than the "main characters and their side going against the odds to prevail in the end" cliche.
+Gabriel Crosley Hey , "5 seconds ago (and counting ) " , commentor ! ! Have a nice day .
Im trynna see Eva Green back...story bihh
"12 abs - I mean hours." "Fuck that moon!" Oh guys, I love you. Thank you for making my day. Also Artemisia: the movie - accurate :)
One of my favorite channels on UA-cam!!!
One enormous mistake, xerxes never cut leonidas head off. He never got the chance to, but the spartans recovered his body. Xerxes did want to do it and set it up on a stake. But the spartans beat him to it.
Slllloooowwwwwmooootiiiooonnnnnn
Braum The heart of the Freljord 'no' 😂😂
The trauma is too much for humanity 💀
Slowmotion was invented in Austria, the same country Hitler was from! It is evil! Evil, i tell you!
GLABROUS
Na Xerxes was remade and then posessed by a Goa'uld... LMAO
@John Doe Yep but Alexander wasn't around yet he he.
They thought "Lets make a movie with as many badass scenes as we can"!
Well what do we put inbetween?
Heroic Speeches!
Noice!
So I know this is 3 years old, @10:50, when you talked about bringing a throne to the middle of nowhere, i just want to inform you in Herodotus, Xerxes actually has a massive marble pillar built in the sea for some random reason.
A single pillar or two of them
3:35 "EAT SHIT BOB" .. John Oliver must be dying with laughter ;)
Praise Mr. Nutter Butter
Cuz fuck Bob and all he represents. Oh, and he can take that bitch Janice from accounting and go fuck off somewhere.
Those 2 guard's had me cracking up!
They heard their skin slapping fast, as he nailed her ass
Notable mention: Sin for the movie neglecting to mention that thermistocles' best contribution to the war was using his silver mine to fund and create the Greek navy and its infrastructure in 10 years.
Also, he ended up working for Artaxerxes I as a governor in 15 years time.
7:44 "Naval General"?? The word is Admiral.
"THIS WAS NOT...SPARTA".
(Said the F*****G Magic Horse)
Stop recommending the emoji move they can't do it till it comes out on blue ray
The Man hey brother
ew.
I mean nice profile pictures guys.
are the viewers of this channel kids or something?? idk any 20-30 year old that actually went to see that movie
Actually they just need permission from the company that made it
17:50 what the hell dude I was drinking redbull and laugh so hard that it came out came out my nose
17:00 Yes actually, back then Sparta does train women, they starts training them as young as 5-years-old so they could be tough and be able to attract men.
😂😂
You guys should do an "Everything Wrong with Rise of the Guardians"! It's such an underrated Dream Works film, yet way better than "Home" or "Captain Underpants"!
...its better than Home, you can keep your opinions about CU to yourself
It is goog
Good
Captain Underpants is actually really good assuming you've read at least one of the books and know what kind of off the wall movie to expect.
Rise Of The Guardians the Owls's Movie?. I remember seeing it, liked a bit too as well.
That circle formation they had in the water was a legit tactic they used back then.
This movie and 300 might as well be a bunch of Chip And Dale dancers reenacting battles in slow mo.
1 sin removed for Jack O’Connell
1 sin added for underusing Jack O’Connell
tea, even though he stated he regretted doing this movie
Never addressed the issue of Spartan Boy Lovers and Spartan slave masters. 1 TRILLION SINS
Spartans didn't have boy lovers. At all. You're thinking of other Greeks. In fact, Spartans were incredibly homophobic. They were supposed to train younger boys (from preteen well into adolescence) into the ways of Sparta, but fiddling with them would mean they would lose all their rights and no longer be called Spartans. Also death. At the very least they would be removed from the Spartan society. Which is as good as death to any Spartan or aspiring Spartan.
Actually, Spartan warriors were encouraged to have relationships with each other. This was so they would have stronger bonds, and fight harder with/for each other. So no, they were not homophobic.
Nope, wrong city state. You're thinking of the Thebans, who were basically homosexual couples, which is why they fought to the last man and were honoured for their bravery with a monument. Spartans were opposite...focused on bravery and not dying a humiliating death with shameful wounds on their back (indicating they were running away).
All i can say is i feel like for the army medics back then calming anal hemorageing must have been there primary job discription
You all said some of the truths: Male-female sex to create new Spartans was mandatory, but they did spent most of their childhoods with people of the same gender and they were encouraged to bond with people of their squads, so homosexualism was not unheard of
Everything wrong with 3 ninjas, one of my favorite childhood movies and randomly popped into my head
Hahahaah your ongoing rage against the bruce almighty moons continues
The 300 series: You cannot sin a movie...
Cinema Sins: This is Cinema Sins!!!!!
I hope they do rogue one and guardians two next week
jonathan mirvish guardians 😍😍😍🙏🙏🙏
jonathan mirvish hope he does fifty shades darker
7:40 "Now, I'm no naval general..."
Or even an admiral, presumably.
*sins Cinemasins*
i just love this dude he makes all of these vids funny
I can't enjoy movies anymore thanks cinema sins 👍
No way! If i want to watch a movie, i watch the cinema sins version first...that way i know if it's stupid or not...can't trust reviews
@@lorielhassani
For every movie?
You wait that much?
@@ayushkhandelwal9382 heck yes!
@@Kobaford probably. But I'm patient and like to laugh and i roll on every video!
@@lorielhassani in that case, I recommend you to watch TheBirdman rather than CinemaSins...just saying..