Not to over simplify the topic, but there'a a Japanese proverb that says something like, if you chase butterflies they will fly away, but if you build a beatiful garden you will attract them....
Maybe society should have given out equal incentives for men and women to go to school to learn to build their gardens. Currently we are telling men, "The butterflies don't need you, they can build their own gardens!" The truth is though, I do not see how an extremely advanced western society can keep functioning if the highly intelligent and hard working men of this generation are never developed into competent members of society. These men were born here, raised here, socalized here, and have all failed en masse. I remember being told that when a racial, ethnic, gender, or sexual orientation group all fails at once that it HAS to be systemic institutionalized discrimination. Based upon the evidence it is discrimination holding men back, but we all decided that some types of discrimination are okay because that group is "privileged." This is a very powerful lesson you are teaching to so many that have nothing to lose.
@@ReallgeemachineFAILED EN MASSE is the point! But bro, really, "extremely advanced western society"?!😂 Maybe it's a God punishment?? 😮😂 or more simply it's a totally fucked underdeveloped human society?
You can only teach what you know and understand. For a lot of people in pre-internet times life simply fell into place. Your parents bowled you into life, and when they threw straight enough you'd hit something. A mechanistic understanding of the social game just wasn't necessary for a much bigger share of the population than who would need it nowadays.
I was born to a schizophrenic mother and a capable father (that I actually knew) who abandoned me. Eventually ended up being raised by my tyrant, maternal, grandfather & neurotic grandmother. I was daily beaten and threatened with foster care and even had my face rubbed in urine and feces like a dog when a toilet overflowed....now 53, and never have had a significant other or children. Women can spot fucked up guys.....at least I never went to prison, other than the "solitary confinement" I have lived in for my entire life. It's easy to be a loser when you've literally, had to face everything in life by yourself. My acceptance of it occurred many years ago.
No man is a loser. I hate when i hear people calling someone a loser. Its a horrible thing to say to someone. But ive noticed we only refer to men as losers, yet never women.
That's because a man can say "Yep, I'm a loser. I need to make changes in my life." A woman can't handle the hit to her ego. She clings to her innate value as a member of the sought after sex. She picks men to pieces and ridicules them for daring to approach her, while neatly avoiding any and all rejection herself. She does not get rejected, she does the rejecting. If she ever does face real rejection, she's devastated, and often wounded emotionally - sometimes for life. Many men today seem envious of this "female privilege" of innate value, and loathe the idea we have no innate value and are only loved for what we can provide. And they act shocked when shown the true transactional nature of human nature. After all, did he not think his resourcefulness would "earn" him an attractive partner? Is this really such a painful truth? Or something we really always have known, deep down? If I lived 1,000 lifetimes, I would take "man" every time. Overcoming adversity is what makes me rock solid. Laughing in the face of adversity and those who would call me a loser is the ultimate male privilege. LOSER! CAN'T GET LAID! CAN'T KEEP A WOMAN! CAN'T MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY! LOSER!! Their words have no weight, and fall off a real mans shining armor like a dried spit ball. They have *shaming language*. That's what they have. They are the pitiful ones. Let them laugh. Let them ridicule. They cannot raise themselves up, so they try to tear you down. Now tell me again, who the real losers are.
I would suggest that the definition of a loser is simply someone who has convinced themselves that they are one. At the end of the day, we all win exactly the same thing.
The problem is pretty simple: we were, as a collective, made to believe that, to be valued, we have to be extraordinary (as in out of the ordinary) in at least something. And the bar for that validation boost is getting higher and higher by the day. Its pretty clear that thats not sustainable and we're being gaslight into hating ourselves and by extention, the world.
And usually that something is wealth (gals especially faun over guys with the most expensive of toys, bling, etc), great looks (usually tall muscular, the appearance of 20/20 eyesight [though these days, girls tend to be slightly attracted to guys who wear glasses, whether prescription or not, and sunglasses make almost anyone look cooler], etc), a personality that's simultaneously dominant yet docile at the same time, etc.
As Chris Rock aptly stated, only women and dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are loved as long as they continue to be able to provide at a sustained, or mostly likely ever increasing level. It is why women hate men they want to partner with playing video games. Oh, the dude they've friendzoned can play them, and she likes being around him, as long his fawning validation never turns to him wanting something more.
The internet ruined it for men. When you’re top 50% of the male population you used to have to compete with just the local men, which would mean statistically you could find a match fairly easily. With social media and dating apps, women can go straight to the top of the chain which crushes the chances of someone in the median which used to do just fine. Women are selectors and they go for the best option they can get. Why would they choose a 50% male when they can get a 20% male?
No man is a loser if he just gets on with it. I knew a scrawny little boy with glasses. Smart, kind. Totally happy as a junkyard dog(pulling auto parts from wrecks) reconnected with his highschool crush, found out they were still in love with each other, but also best friends. He moved up to jiffy lube, a regular auto shop, constantly taking night classes then maintenance at the airport, then steel composites, then development at the space port, then working on the space shuttle. Had a brilliant beautiful daughter.He still does free car maintenance for family friends. Loves his wife, owns his home is only 40 years old. Nobody saw the potential that boy had. Don't accept your fate. Just put one foot in front of the other every day. Love and be loved honestly.
"Moved up to Jiffy Lube"? ROTFLMAO. In the world of auto repair, Jiffy Lube is as far down at the bottom as you can go. Saying you work at Jiffy Lube is like saying you have a job cleaning public restrooms with your tongue
All men know what sex appeal is when it comes to women but they don't seem to realize that it goes both ways. They have known women that don't fit the typical standard of beauty but drip that sort of appeal. It's not always the broad shouldered quarterback that is the most alluring. Confidence plays a big role.
I remember working with a bloke, reminded me of MR Burns, he was highly intelligent but was void of social skills. Poor bloke got bullied every day constantly, sometimes he would ask to be left alone. I thought it was pathetic that they wouldn't give him peace. Got a call from a friend 3 years later telling me our mutual friend flipped and took the steel tube from the Hoover and battered the 3 guys harassing him. I believe they were rushed to hospital. Poor bloke eventually let the rage out.
@@CrystalShip8899 Ive met a few types like that. Usually when I try to teach them basic social skills that can protect them they refuse to listen. I had my entire world model changed by people that willingly choose to suffer instead of making even the most minor of changes, or to stand up for themselves after I have done 99% of the work by telling their bully off.
Did they crumple beneath the blows from his powerful Mr Burns physique or rupture something from laughing too hard at some Mr Burns like man attempting to best them physically?
@@EarlMcManus2005 I was a few hours away by car so didn't actually see it, just heard from a good friend his victim's were rushed to hospital. He got bullied terribly because of his demeanor, amongst other things like his sister was stunning but he clearly wasn't. I think the worst joke that was played on him was that he was hung like a horse but had a face for radio.
In my experience I've only met maybe 2 women who actually seemed like women I'd be interested in pursuing a relationship with, and for the two I met, each at different points in my life, I found myself to be poorly inadequate. A real sense of "I am not all I could be, or even enough to justify burdening her with myself". Since then my focus has been on myself, sorting out my mind and life, becoming someone I see as worthy of the kind of woman I am interested in. I just turned 27, and still am a work in progress, but I'm not chasing the idea that just anyone's company will magically fix things, and even if a life long romantic relationship isn't in the cards, I'm still bettering myself for my own sake and the sake of every other life I happen to come in contact with. Who you choose to be matters, in all aspects of life.
You're not gonna find the kind of woman you built yourself up for in the US or the western world . Their minds have all been poisoned if you want a loyal loving dedicated wife that will respect and honor you I would suggest going to Southeast Asia to find a wife
Hmmm yeah... Well if by the age of 27 there are only 2 women you've met in your life that meet your idea of relationship material maybe you really do need to look at yourself. That is definitely an issue, not just who you see yourself as. I'm not saying this to be a dick, but to highlight that only 2 in 27 years really points to the "I have standards" equivalent women get called out for. Yeah there are standards and there are unrealistic standards.
My parents divorced when I was 8 and my brother was 6. My dad took care of everything because my mother was mentally ill. At 12 years old she moved to Mexico and my dad moved back into our home. It wasn't perfect, but it was a lot better than dealing with my mom. When I was almost 16 years old, my mother moved back from Mexico. I wanted to help my dad take care of my mom and ended up taking on way too much of her responsibility in the process. Many years later at 45--and on my second divorce--I came to realize that I had essentially married two women who were shit birds just like my mom--and I made a change. I decided that I could never save my mom--or these two women--and that I was going to reach out to My Savior. At 45 I became a Christian and my life has been ten times better. So much of the New Testament made sense to me for the first time and I know live with so much more peace. Thanks for reading. Roy, So Cal.
@@JonathanLopezUT I bet he was a Firstborn. Am I right? It's very easy for the oldest--both boys and girls--to take on the role of a surrogate in a divorced, dysfunctional, or death situation.
I was a long term "loser" mostly due to the fact that I felt as if the incentive reward for average males in society like me was not worth the reward. I then got my life together and basically had all these assumptions proven true with experience. After a couple of years of full time work and dating (even successfully) I was completely disillusioned. The only thing this world wants from you as a male is to take up the role of essentially a willing mule without question. Perhaps this worked it a functioning society where toil would actually sustain a decent lifestyle but now it's simply broken. I'm back to being a "loser" again and I'm happier than when I "functioned" in the world.
You didnt have to become a work mule to notice that the social contract is broken. Men must fulfill their duties but women do not need to fulfill a thing. Im sure you wouldnt mind much at all if you had a woman that dutifully fulfilled her side of the contract by being a loyal, chaste, problem solving mother to your children. Sadly now a days the bad advice culture for women is so mainstream and so toxic that nearly every female is bombarded with this crab in a bucket mentality from fem-ism. What human being cant be manipulated with the promise that you are morally justified in doing whatever you want because you are a permanent and perpetual victim? I am convinced this is female intra-sexual competition on steroids though. The worse it gets with childlessness and broken relationships the more women will push hate and bad ideas onto girls until every woman in the world is deeply traumatized and depressed. Humans try to normalize their trauma by traumatizing others instead of dealing with their faults and becoming better.
Very honest and insightful. The whole thing is a trap. You have to really try to shut your eyes as hard as you can to not see it if you have even more than a couple brain cells to rub together.
I grew up in a culture where a girl gets pregnant at 16 and the State pays for her apartment , food , and medical . The boyfriend lives with her and gives her more children . Soon is a three bedroom house and nobody ever had a job .
If you have an idea of the woman you want to be your partner, cultivate yourself to be the man this kind of woman would want. If you have an idea of the man you want to be your partner, cultivate yourself to be the kind of woman he would want. Then go where that kind of man/woman would be. It's that simple. That quality of person is unlikely to be hanging out at a bar, or displaying themselves as a sexual player online.
I agree. The only rational thing to do is aim to be something your ideal partner would desire. Everyone understands this when it comes to getting into school or getting a job. Somehow, they reject the idea the moment they're talking about sexual partners, then they feel entitled to a CEO job despite being unqualified.
I think the first step is to make sure what you think you want is actually what you want and not just the voices of others speaking in place of your own.
I believed half of my life, that I am a looser. Now I am old and I can compare my victories and my defeats with those of other men and I can see, that I was just an average man. Even a bit above average. The problem of a lot of young men and women is, that they compare themselves with movie heroes. From this viewpoint a lot of movies for teen audiences are really toxic.
Same. From age 15-25 I thought I was a loser. I took inventory of my situation: ~3 years of banking, a gf who said I’d shine barstools with my ass, and a union family who always cheered for a failure. One cold night, I dumped em. I took that big job in NYC, moved to Brooklyn, and said adios to many women (in my periphery). Boy was this a reverse uno. As for the women, I never had so many (from my old town) wanting to visit me. Weird.
@@johnbreedlove3245 in their own circles, often meeting a mate before they even leave home. Certainly not in a bar full of alcoholics. Try church, if you are into the occult, or groups for various things with meetups. Flirt with the cashiers at the stores and let them know you are interested. Women are lonely, too. Just like men, they are often not attracted to the people who are attracted to them. Women with kids can be especially interested, because a lot of the men they meet are very turned off by them having a child already. You have to try, and when you get a date, do not turn sour if she is not the one, or ghosts you, or whatever. Just move along to the next potential partner until you find one that you can put up with and who can put up with you. There are million people out there that would make a fine partner for you, unless you are especially obnoxious, and you will find one when you least expect it. You will look into each others' eyes and you will know right away, "this person likes what they see!". As a man, you are lucky. You can initiate the game. She, on the other hand, may feel she has to wait for you to initiate and if you do not.... then nothing happens. :(
i think the good, and the evil in us runs deep, right to the bottom of our soul. Our evil is necessary for us to survive and sustain others. But, I'm also a bit of a loser myself.
The title of this video sucks. It doesn’t even explain the pathology of losers. Crumb wasn’t a loser at all in the end, but his family is a real testament of a dysfunctional family of social awkwardness and yes, despair. Honestly, it angers me the whole reduction of calling people losers. These males need more compassion and support than “your way life of pathological and you should get over it.”
Are you kidding? Crumb was the one who saw that in himself. That's the point and specifically what Jordan gets at. Don't always blame others or "the other" for situations - take ownership.
The term "loser" only applies to men. I remember in high school one kid called me a loser, and this was back in the early 90's. Well, fast forward 30 something years, and I got a steady job, pay my bills, law abiding citizen, never been married nor have children, and I am 47, so according to Jordan Peterson, since I am not married nor had kids, that makes me a "loser" then. And I have been rejected left and right by women for the most part.
I mean sex and relationships is kind of the point for 99.9 percent of people. But I don’t think he is saying you are a loser, he is saying if being successful is something you really want and you are having trouble with that, it’s probably you.
Yes, but it is easier for evil or ruthless people with big ego to label others as "losers", instead of seeing them as the complex human beings with personal struggles and dignity that they in reality are.
The line is “that all changed when I got famous” he smiles, quite aware of the irony and that it makes him seem like a misanthrope. Crumb is nothing if not self aware.
I had a similar experience when I moved abroad and it really made me struggle with bitterness. Fortunately I still maintained a sense of wisdom and was sort of able to distinguish between the women who were attracted to me for good reasons and bad ones and met my wife. I think a lot of the bitterness from men is the realization that they have to play this superficial game that's really hard to win to attract women. And playing the game itself can corrupt ones soul.
@@tyloniussquib4000glad to hear you overcame that. Yes I think if we become “better” at living combining your self reflection and a bit of discipline (social fluency and solid friendships would also be essential) the mating game becomes a bit easier. Terrible to have to mold oneself according to feedback from women we’re attracted to.
@@careyyost4981 Mother nature wants men to do this. She wants us to mold ourselves to be desirable to the women we find attractive. Now, it's very often a recipe for some very expensive misery, but... MOST men will always be willing to play that game. For me, after a younger life full of conquest, I now can say that the curse for me has been lifted. I have been woman free for almost 11 years now. Woman free. Debt free. Cancer free. I'm just.... free.
"Crumb" is indeed quite a document. It has been said that the filmmaker was really more interested in making a movie about Robert Crumb's brother Charles, than about his friend Robert. It was Robert's fame or infamy that made the movie possible. Not to mention the directors impressive tenacity. Who was not above threatening suicide as a means of keeping Robert onboard with the project. Interstingly, Robert Crumb was actually somewhat successful before his lifelong adventure as king of the underground cartoonists. And married. To one of his dream women. Before meeting a genuinely beautiful version of his dream woman and marrying her. What's more, Robert was friends with another "loser" who also wound up with a movie being made about him. A movie based on his work, actually. Harvey Pekar. Work which basicly reads like a documentary in cartoon form. The movie is "American Splender," and is the perfect companion piece to "Crumb."
"On your date ask her about her previous boyfriends (and girlfriends and cats and dogs) and ask her if it was her fault that the relationships failed" brilliant master level dating advice, has he ever actually interacted with a woman? Yes, ask her to her face if she is to blame for being dumped by her ex on your first date.
Yeah that was hilarious. It was a wth? I could not believe this guy gives advice on relationships - then noticed his book carefully propped up in the background. It's on divorce. You have to reach one hell of a bitterness level to want to write a book on it. It's still in his eyes.
Interesting discussion. That analogy using the elks rack reminded me of this old Miller Lite commercial where a guy goes to a bowling alley and asks for size 10 shoes but is told the only pair left is size 13. He goes ahead a rents those even though he doesn't want to then he sits down and spots some women sitting near him. He smiles at them and raises his beer but they laugh at the guy in that unique way only women can, that get lost loser sort of condensation. The guy dips his shoulders, sighs in resignation knowing everyone from the shoe guy to these women have zero respect for him, then he puts his feet with those big old size 13 shoes up and the women all do a double take, changing their expression as a horse neighing sound effect is played. The point is clear and it was quite edgy for a commercial but it spoke to a certain amount of truth when it comes to people and their superficial shallow desire for gratification. But it also spoke to a deeper is issue, respect. I haven't learned as much as I would have liked these past several decades but if a young man asked my advice on the matter of getting by in the world and selecting a good and decent woman to take the journey with I would tell him to adhere to certain to precepts, deal-breakers if you will. First, never let anyone else define who you are. There are enough honest and decent people out there but a whole bunch of them will project all kinds of negative traits on to you and those are the ones that seem to take root. I'm not saying you shouldn't accept valid criticism, just don't let someone apply the loser tab to you. Two, don't hang around with anyone who disrespects you, especially women. She may be a knock out who is great in the sack but if she doesn't respect you she will leave or step out. And as they point out here, if she has a history of disrespecting men or has had multiple relationships understand she will treat you the same way. Walk away from women like that. Realize you can't fix or change anyone except yourself. If you act like a victim people will treat you like one and later on down the road all you get for the effort is a bunch of resentments that flood in like a tsunami. Parents can play all sorts of mind-games on their kids, but how long someone carries that baggage around is up to them.
Exactly. I've worked hard to get where I am. There is no incentive for me to risk that on a relationship where she hasn't worked to get to this point, but can get half because of the power of the vagina. I'm on my own. Let them do the same. I figured out what I want and kids aren't part of the picture. If I don't want kids, I don't need a woman.
@@jen-gv7tx Once a man learns to control & quell the sexual impulse, you'd be surprised how little sway women hold. Sex isn't hard to find, and intimacy in terms of closeness & sharing thoughts is ill-advised when those thoughts are shared with a woman. Everything you say can & will be used against you, so the risk outweighs the reward.
I trust Farrell on this issue a little more than Peterson….It’s up to men to see the mating game as a rigged game & see yourself as a kind of winner for not participating in something which can lead to your own demise…..between the (low) quality of many western women & the near misandry of our institutions, entertainment, etc…a growing number of men are refusing to play a game that has very few real winners anyway.
@@8Ayelet that sounds like a middle ground fallacy - assuming that there are equal parts of good and bad women in every culture, and discarding the possibility of there being a real social and cultural problem with women's beliefs and behaviour towards men nowadays.
Non-conforming with contribution is fine. Artists and inventors often don’t conform but they do contribute. But refusing to conform and contribute while demanding something in return is rather useless.
@@chamuuemura5314an artist who sells a lot of paintings is considered a success. Another artist who does not, some people call a "loser", one who tried tp play the art game and was not able to get paid or rewarded in some way for it. (this assuming they also did not have anything else going on that developed into "success" level)
there needs to be a deep discussion about the people who "don't have the ability, the want, the need to conform to the rules." There are many examples throughout history.
I understand the points Jordan Peterson makes in this video about men taking necessary steps to make themselves more attractive to the opposite sex. However, in today’s Western society, with its disenfranchisement of men and the influence of technology on male and female dynamics, more and more high-quality men are opting out of the dating game and choosing to remain single. I don't believe men are the problem anymore. The issue is far more complex than just shaming men for not participating in the system. It's no wonder that MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) is still popular and potentially growing.
That's really not as smart as you want to believe it is. Everyone tends to chase after what they consider the best, and humans tend to somewhat agree on who are the best, and most of the time, you're not good enough to get the best.
It's hard to get strong without properly suffering, there are lessons to be learned in defeat, the harder the better, if you have enough fortitude eventually you become adamant.
Well most women are now told and taught to be men. Of course they are going to suck at doing a man's work. The problem is that they not see the flagellation of their femininity as a problem because it adheres to their emotional values of doing what they feel like doing.
I was diagnosed with Tourette’s syndrome when I was 19; I have been rejected by every girl I ever expressed interest in. Now, at 50, I’m single, broke, living alone in a shit-hole apartment, strung-out on psychoactive medications, and having difficulty holding a job. Plus, I have been attending junior college off and on since 1993 and I only have 13 credits. I was bullied by my alcoholic older brother growing up along with certain hooligans from the neighborhood and high school. Thus, I have problems forming relationships with people. Should I just say, “the hell with it all” and give up? HELL NO!!
I read all this and my thoughts are that your strength and tenacity is astounding and obviously god-given. Peace be with you man and may your persistence pay off. When you ask the question “should I just say to hell with it all and give up?” I read it as something you may have asked yourself over and over again throughout life. I know I have. The thing is that there is nothing to quit to, when whatever lies ahead always promises better things, mysterious as the future may be. It’s up to us what happens. God bless.
Warren Farrell’s point at the end is exactly right. Do you actually want to pay what it costs to attract all women? Or do you want to pay what it costs to be yourself, and attract whomever that happens to attract?
I think if anybody has experienced the lowest lows and high highs that person, if they are honest , become wiser, and if they are good, more compassionate The Crumb documentary looks at this
I grew up with this girl a few doors down in our Sudbury mining village.She was a quiet, beautiful modest girl but a strong sigma wolf that guys didn't mess with.One day at our High School,.... Angela rounded a corner and found a student that was picking on our version of a Robert Crumb.Angela,... sprang into action and backed the bully up against the lockers and the bully coward. She is empathic morally kind and full of authentic charcter. she impressed me back the in the 1970's and I eventually waited in turn to date her in 1979 and then married her by 1984. I can only wonder how would Robert Crumb would draw her heroism and kindness as a a defender of the nerds in the High School hallway or on the street ?
You can get peace of mind in solitude. Many women are doing that and are branded as evil, when they are only growing some dignity. Please have some dignity and don't settle for something that makes you unhappy.
Same with women. We have to be straight and square with ourselves, first. Then the right relationship comes, when both people are ready to augment their lives.
Well if they are ina relationship because it's all they could get then why not prove they are worth more? Cant you be happy where you are at? It takes work but so does keeping a woman who is high end so I guess you get what you put in
It's a fascinating documentary. His brother who was living in the mom's basement is briefly interviewed and while noticeably disarrayed, it was obvious he was very intelligent. The way he went out was horrific.
If my parents had given me away for adoption, I would have had a wife and children by now. Also, if internet had been around when I was a kid, maybe I would have been able to figure things out instead of being completely alone in the world with no information available anywhere. It cannot be underestimated how much harm parents can do to their children.
I've said many times that "Crumb" is my favorite documentary. Final takeaway for me is the razor thin line between a successful artist and the tragic lives of his brothers featured in the film. It's a very funny film too. I just quoted Robert's sadly now deceased wife, speaking of her mother- "honey, have you got any Sweet N Low?" If you've seen it you know. "Who painted that?" " I did Mom, remember you put me through art school?"
"Coats groomed. Claws sharp. May your snouts lead you to bright treasures, hidden in the dark." The narcissism of others will mould you into sociopaths. From sheep sheared, we become wolves, and from wolves, we may become lions. You as men should not seek to become food/hosts for parasites.
I think the man is missing the point. Dr Peterson is gently reminding men that women are the choosers. So many men are so happy with the potential of being able to have sex that they will put up with unbelievable behavior and sociopathy in order to get it. I’ve watched this with the men in my life for over 50 years. I’ve never had a discussion with any of these men in which they’ve actually interviewed these women and watched their behavior to the point of ultimately rejecting them based on said behavior. No, they dove in blindly and then found out down the road that the woman was seriously deranged. I was even told that a crazy woman was fun. I’m guessing they mean sexually, but that is such a small portion of a relationship. Men’s standards have dropped significantly and women’s have risen. In this switcheroo, women’s behavior has plummeted astronomically. What a world we live in!
Yes, it is amazing. I would say most every man in a relationship has taken the "at any cost" mindset. From the moment they get married, they will have no money or savings. She spent it all. Also she rules with insane demands. I saw my mother act like that and my father just put up with it.
Sometimes a man is so completely devoid of female affection, companionship and intimacy (and no, i dont mean just sex, although that is a factor) for whatever reason the they will treasure any chance they get, ive met some guys with shitty social skills, not very good appearance and, while they had a lot of intresting things about them, they werent adventurous or "exciting" in many ways even though i enjoy their company. We all talk about responsability and standards and i agree with it, but lets remember that some guys just dont get better options.
Yea - he is starting his narrative in current western society. Completely ignoring how the human race was able to survive and procreate for centuries. If women are the choosers - they suck - and are destroying society before our very eyes. It's no longer the top 10% - they are now selective to the top 5% - and the most rude petulant a-holes to all other men.
At the risk of being pendantic, I've been a hunter and wildlife photographer for over 50 years; and I've never heard the male elk called a "buck". They've been widely referred to as "bulls", like male cows.
Robert Crumb as far as I am concerned is a genius amd probably the worlds greatest graphic artist. I have been a fan of his artwork since the early 70's , Fritz the Cat, Mr Narural, Flakey Foont, Angel Food McSpade, Whiteman meets Bigfoot - Don Whiteman & Yeti and so on. Another great artist of the same era is S Clay Wilson - The Checkered Demon, Capt. Pissgums and his Pervert Pirates and of course the incomparable ' Ruby the Dyke vs Weedman" . I am eternally grateful to these artists for ths hours of mind bending fun poring of their artwork and for Robert Crumb's love of American Roots music, it was through him and his artwork that got me turned on to the Delta Blues and old accoustic country blues in general, one of the great loves of my life - thanks Robert.
Most the people who view themselves as “losers” are actively making their matters worse or doing nothing to improve it. At some point you have to be be honest on if you’re holding yourself to the same standards you demand from a partner.
I was also considered a loser in HS so I certainly appreciate this video, went to Engineering school and found a wonderful woman in college, got married and had two beautiful kids - really happy now!
We look outside so much we forget to look within for the answers we need. We seek, we chase, and we dream, but so often none of that is what we honestly want.
I think they key is knowing when to stop. I climbed the academic ladder until it was no fun anymore, and that's when I stopped. Felt better after that. Glad I got as far as I did, but also glad I didn't try to keep going when it was time to find something different.
Have you thought about going on a speaking tour of all male schools , boarding schools and military schools? In today’s world they need to hear a good message. I have a nephew who I felt was an odd duck , well that changed when he met his wife ! Never saw him the same again , he was so happy and in love. It was such a transition!!!
I came from an abusive family and putting me down. Everytime a good, beautiful woman shows interest in me. I either sabatoge or not engage. Cause I never good enough and not to cause the pain.
I've experienced that level of detestment from women in my life and actually did eventually overcome it it left me for a period of time grappling with a great deal of bitterness towards women in general. Ironically I met my wife during this. Who is a saint and this honestly helped me overcome bitterness while remaining realistic. I'll never make excuses for people but we really do live in a society that gives almost consideration to men and their struggles. Also I would highly recommend any men's day as far as possible from low-run positions in female dominated industries. I hate to call people NPCs but the reality is is women are just sort of programmed to treat men lower than them with absolute disdain these are people who can go on and manage your family and be civil in other matters but for some reason they just can't stop themselves from punching down I still don't understand it and I suppose because of that some level of bitterness remains in my heart.
I've also received, even in my own home by my sister. She'd say I was ugly. In the school I could feel the way I was treated, with the utmost disrespect even by the female teachers. This has decreased, as I matured and got better looking and better ajusted, but the wound won't ever completely heal.
@@AllAhabNoMobyin the context of this video it is advice. Watching the documentary you see how Crumb grows up to hate women. And Jordan points to the fact that he harbors resentment towards the time when they didn't feel attracted to him. Once you accept that attraction isnt a choice the resentment should go together with it.
“Crumb” is one of my favorite films. The filmmaker was Terry Zweigoff, a friend of Robert’s. Crumb’s comics on women is rough. I saw it when it came out with a lefty crowd. They had a tough time of it.
I grew up with a dad who admired his comics. And my dad thought they were funny and I as a teenage girl was being sensitive. And my dad is a lefty hippie.
Worked my way through life's challenges & hit each milestone/expectation along the way...after 20+ years of it, I am beyond disillusioned. Don't waste your time, gentlemen. Just find some meaning in life that belongs to you and you alone, take whatever easy lays come your way, but don't bother going out of your way for it...there's no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow of lies. I'd rather go back to being a loser over being a used fool.
Many men who did everything they were told to do are ejected from family, ejected by friends, and ejected by society. There is only one person to please and that's the man in the mirror. And by please I don't mean vain or selfish pursuits. By please, I mean only the man in the mirror can validate the man in the mirror. Most of what society asks of us men to do, we really don't need to do. People who regularly say "I don't care what society thinks." very often do. When you really don't care - and shrug off social expectations and serve your own purpose, then you are really free.
Me personally, I am not on any social media and never been on dating apps. I live in a world city, one of the wealthiest in culture, history and economics. People call me handsome and intelligent. I rarely have romantic relationships. My principles and self narrative restrict my options. It’s hard to find the balance between what ideals you hold and being realistic. The art of compromise, negotiation, trust, forgiveness is lost. I’m ambivalent about sticking to my values and conforming to the social paradigm of the 21th century.
Yes me too, I don't believe in modern society but as a member of modern society I also depend on it for my survival. It has become impossible for me to participate in a society I whole heartedly do not believe in.
I gave you a thumbs up, so don't be an ingrate. You and I are part of one social medium: UA-cam. I occasionally watch YT channels that feature footage from Tik Tok. "Crumb" is a great doc, but I've only seen it once, and I am not in a hurry to run out and rent it again.
I just want to say that I loved every comment I was able to read on this. Humanity is definitely not without reproach. This is the kind of stuff that gives it the light it needs to see through the darkness and help find it's way back.
I think I'm one of those "male losers" I'm 29. Single. When I look back, I think the turning point for me was my Auto immune disease. As a kid I was very good at sports, and VERY GOOD at arts. (Drawing in particular) I was always in a group of friends. But when disease hit, I started to back away from everyone. Isolate myself. Also had a strong mother that divorced with alcoholic father and raised us alone. So as years went by my auto immune disease got worse and worse. made my skin look worse and worse. That led to me being more and more embarrassed of my body. Those stupid thoughts got in to the head... "I'm not good enough", "I'm ugly", "there is no way any girl will like some one like me" this led to less and less social interactions. Also technology like (PC Gaming) came along to assist that lack of social interactions. This continued to snowball after graduation and in to later life. So as of today... I work, I make money, I pay my bills, I play my games, I do what ever I want. And when I see an attractive woman, in a workplace or in public, I just walk pass as its not even there. I know nothing going to happen anyway. So why even bother trying. And even if some one liked me, would I be willing to sacrifice my freedom and my time for other person. I know I'm not alone in this situation. (Don't mind my bad English, not native)
You assume an attractive woman does not have had any health or autoimmune situations herself. Could just say “hello”. Don’t expect anything…just be friendly instead of angry. I have an autoimmune disease. My beautiful cousin the same. Don’t assume.
Yesterday and today I posted a comment here, but both times it has been deleted or censored. I hope this test comment remains. If it does I'll try again.
I reposted the original comment again. It was gone when I refreshed the page. Shameful. I'll try again. This time the person's name will be in the initial characters of the groups of short words.
Reminds me of the episode of The Simpsons when Homer goes to NYC to retrieve his booted car, gets fed up with the frustrating process of getting it removed and effectively destroys the car by removing the boot with a jackhammer. Hilarious yet highly symbolic as an analogue to men and dating. Men will completely destroy their lives just to get laid and not be perceived as a loser.
Whether you are a Winner or Loser has been determined by your 5th birthday, by a mixture of one's genetics and one's early experiences If a Winner, one has a choice between being a kindly Winner, building others up; or being a cruel Winner, putting others down. If a Loser, one has a choice between being a good-natured Loser trying to make a contribution and being helpful to others; or being an ill-natured Loser destroying oneself and/or others.
I would have liked to get married, but for a whole raft of reasons, didn't. When I reached my sixties, it became clear that if I'd had a family to support (even partly) and bring up, the worries - and practical burdens - would have killed me. Thus I'm still alive through having always been an unattached bachelor. And on the biblical principle that "A living dog is better than a dead lion" (Ecclesiastes 9:4), I'm successful.
Thank you for your comment It adds a lot of value for me That being said when you're in your 30's and 40's - with the current divorce rate - I think it becomes much easier to find a partner who already has children Exactly because having children no longer has anything to do with it So here I am being forced to filter all these single moms and divorced or insane women in order to find one who I can and want to have children with While you are heavily emphasizing the having children aspect as if it is standing out in your raft of reasons But after reproductive age it no longer has that much to do with marriage There's plenty to go around for you Not wanting to have children does not mean in the slightest that you can't have a proper marriage So that is the part that seems contradictory to me It's like these two things are glued together for you in a way that doesn't seem all that natural to me
By uniting with God you're becoming a winner. You're burning out all the needless stuff. Just have glance at the other side of the yard to see those under the devil's grasp.
An author similar to Crumb is Christoffer Nielsen. Comic writer from the same era, based out of Norway, not really a suffering man himself but with plenty of those around him, his brother included. A main theme of his dark humor being "how things can go wrong", he took it upon himself to describe the psyche of drug abusers among many other things. That attracted a morbid fascination here in Norway so a theatrical play became animated shorts by name of "To Trøtte typer" ("Two Worn Out Guys") and then the full length movie "Free Jimmy". The international crowd wasn't used to that kind of humor, however so it was a flop. If you have a fascination for mind boggling failure, however, it's well worth a watch. Or, I even think you can see "To Trøtte Typer" for free if you search it up.
I am over 50 fit and have never struggled with sleeping with woman until recently. The last 3 timed I have been propositioned have been by woman in a marriage or relationship. One with the guy at home looking after their kid. (no I didn't x 3) I have daughters and keep an interest in the way they perceive men. It's not good! It's not good for all of us. Kiss good bye to a monogamous relationship on the whole. They have been called "unicorns" for a reason. For these content creators who say it has always been like this. This is just not true. When you push degeneracy into the multitude you get what you get. Why would any guy risk everything for what is now an abstract image of what long term love is?
@@user-lt1jd1ye3v Not worth the risk at all. Countless men are betrayed after decades of marriage to women they thought were perfect. It's pure foolishness to trust unconditionally.
I visited Rip Off Press when I was in San Francisco 40 years ago. Crumb loved the hippie world of the 60’s, free love, Haight and Ashbury, and all the trappings of the hippie lifestyle. He detested it once the dark elements saw what was happening. Bikers, hoodlums, criminals, predators, They all moved in and took advantage of the openness and the naïveté this world had to offer. Strong men create good times. Good times create weak men. Weak men create bad times. Bad times create strong men. Strong men create good times.
That's what I did in my early 20's. Loved it. But when I got hurt I changed my course. I tried to come back in my 40's and it wasn't fun anymore. Still, if it gives you purpose, go with it. Like you said, regardless of your body type or age. But if you're old, you definitely have to limit how hard you push yourself. Unless you want a snapped tendon or something.
@penderyn8794That's a bad idea for 2 reasons. 1, before the advent of targeted training introduced by people like Eugene Sandow, muscular physiques were practically unheard of. Physical jobs don't provide the right type of stimulus to develop a lot of muscle, maybe a little. 2, most physical jobs involve moving in sub-optimal ways for extended periods of time. Most mechanics for example end up damaging their body by their 40s. Weight training lets you choose to only work out for, say, an hour, 3-4 days per week, whilst controlling your form. So basically, weight training results in larger gains and less physical damage/degradation.
I have my own house, make an above-average salary, volunteer for a high office position at a well-known children's hospital, work out all the time/am not overweight, and I 6'3". I still get rejected by women. And when I ask them what I could do to improve, they say nothing but they just don't see things working out. If I'm the problem, I'd love to fix it, but I'm finding it hard to believe I'm the problem.
The fact that you asked women basically "how can I improve myself to be worthy of you" shows a severely low self confidence. Should you be open to constructive criticism being volunteerd from people who really know you? Sure. But asking approval and feedback from some woman you're dating and trying to convince her to like you? No way. If your profile pic is you, your looks are fine. Somehow, you are coming across as overly needy or creepy, but you're not seeing it. Go to coach Corey Wayne's channel and peruse his videos. He's got a free book too. He'll help you understand how you might be lowering a womans attraction. (Yes the dating pool is awful, but it's likely you are messing up the seduction process, like so many dudes.)
@@GUITARTIME2024Asking for improvement isn't being needy or creepy. And I don't have low self confidence. Listening to people like that who encourage frequent sex with random women does not make you less needy. In fact, it makes you more needy because you have lesser standards for the women you're with. I would recommend not listening to people like this.
@spiritsavage That's the saddest thing I've heard in a long time."Can you give me advice on how not to completely lose your attraction, my fair lady." (plus they often can't articulate what you're doing wrong, or you creep them out so they dont want to be honest. ) You also might want to be screened for autism.
@@MobNuke You dont have to take my word for it. Do your research. Attractiveness is directly related with the capability of generating a healthy offspring, which totally makes sense by an evolutionary perspective. Thats why a person with a disability bound to a wheelchair for life doesnt really have the most desirable genes to pass along, and its not exactly what you would want to breed with.
@@Pazuzu- I see what your saying, its not unheard of for a disabled person to have children though. How would a woman know if a guy's immune system is weak or not anyways?
I'm 36 yo male. I am generally considered good looking by women. I have kept steady, generally well-paying, employment my whole adult life and my net worth is good for my age. I've been told that I am a picture of health - physically anyway. I have good hobbies. I don't have great mental health though. It's hard for me to form close relationships, and I find it hard to engage in/maintain conversation with anyone, including family. Because of this, it's been over 10 years since I have had a girlfriend. I have never had sex or kissed a girl even (I am also a devout religious person). i don't really have friends. I grew up in a loveless household and have struggled with self-abasing thoughts my whole life (though they are getting to be less and less). Really hard to overcome social anxiety/awkwardness, despite efforts to do so. Sometimes, I do feel like a loser. Anyone else have this struggle?
The main thing you should do is ditch the religious stuff. All religion does is instill an "unworthy" mindset, which also is probably subconsciously keeping you single.
@cabey2082 I went through that struggle in my early 20's. You are lucky because you are still young (as a man), and have years ahead to learn from your mistakes. Women do not have that luxury, so they have a much more dangerous, perilous (foreshortened) journey.
5:54 Absolutely. It’s such a cop out to dispose of marriage and family because of difficulty. Landing a good woman has always been the challenge of a man’s early life. You have to choose well, be in community and take the risk of living your life. Don’t be a coward and hide out in excuses.
Great clip, especially at the beginning with the "Crumb" commentary and then at the 9:00 mark with the analogy with the buck elk and their antler racks.
"Let's not fix humanity, society or our standards and grow as a species. The solution to your suffering is to play this more or less psychopathic game where we value humans not because their personality or huminity but by what they can offer each one of us and how we can benefit from others." In other words even a psychologist like Mr. Peterson thinks that we humans are only valuable as tools to benefit others. Until 4:50 I was like: "I have already drawn the conclusion that should be taken from this but let's see what Mr. Peterson thinks the logical conclusion is." His conclusion wasn't what I thought a psychologist would say. Edit: The problem isn't that you shouldn't be useful. It's perpetuating the idea which gold digger women also say. This is what I think is problem with humanity, we view everything as transactional. "Be useful, not used." This is why as a Christian, and Peterson is you see this I mean biblical way not the postmodernist intellectual way, a human's value in any relationship shouldn't be tired of being useful the way you said. I wonder if Paul, Silas, John, Peter etc were losers according to this. Jesus himself didn't have an actual job. He went around places and preached the kingdom of God. Same basically for Paul during his ministry, though Paul made tents. In other words, if you marry someone should they stick with you in sickness and in health or when you are the richest man alive? Does she love you if she's only there for money and what you provide? Is that type of woman worth even your attention? An example from 12 rules for life, was Tammy there when you took antidepressants? When Mikhaila was sick? When she herself was sick? Ever heard of the term "Fair weather friend?" That's basically what I'm talking about. Apparently humanity hasn't changed in 2000 years.
@@JordanBPetersonWhy? If you're being wronged, shouldn't you resent it? Isn't giving up your resentment at being continually wronged just accepting being wronged forever without resistance?
I'm sometimes surprised that I stop finding a woman attractive if I find her unusually selfish or some other very negative quality I hadn't expected. I suppose that might prove that the underlying reason I find some women attractive up until that point is for procreation reasons, even though that isn't foremost in my mind or even likely at my age and position in life. Although I consider myself a "loser" in one sense, the usual sense, I consider myself fortunate in other ways, such as being looked upon as a grandad by my friend's children, many now grown up, because they aren;t judging me by anything other than mywillingness to spend time playing their games that their parents aren't, or spend money on treats lol - so I feel a success in that sense. Having a few healthy hobbies helps also, even though I'm not particularly good at any of them, I enjoy passing on the bits I;ve learned about things like songwriting or whatever. I feel sorry for kids who get to about 20 and show no signs of ever escaping living at home and their hobbies being kinda UNhealthy obsessions I;d say, like video games where they will never be anything to show for their efforts. It's so hard to positively influence those people though when they've learned to measure success all the usual ways and feel sorry for themselves for their predicament, never seeming to think outside the box a bit. Or maybe I am misjudging them. Just thinking aloud.
Video games can be a great gateway to strategic thinking, creativity and further education like history or programming. Of course they can be overdone and many modern games are done by corporations that are just as exploitative as the gambling industry.
@@mysmartphonechannel I'll have to think about that then as I'm sure you're right and I can't pretend to know anything about video games other than having to keep buying the ridiculously expensive controllers and games and charge cables or mending the consoles which used to overheat - so they've always seemed like a gateway to parents wallets. I suppose it must depend on the individual and their life circumstances to some extent because come to think of it, I was forgetting about some of the people I have known who grew up to have very respectable, responsible jobs like teaching or social work, now married with children - In that case they had educated parents. I was probably over focussing on the few I know who don't have much else going on in their lives with a stressed single Mum who mainly wants them out of the way I guess. In that case I've failed to inspire them to take interest in a wider variety of things such as their bikes or learning to play chess, so I can at least join in. It was cute when they were little and showing me the Fortnite dances but got less cute when they became obsessed with the more, er, "aggressive" games shall we say, staying up all night and having some questionable interests and "career" paths - I'm having to speak in couched language. Picture Ali G and you won;t be far off, because that's almost how one lad I know has begun to talk and that culture seems attractive to them for some reason. It's hard for an oldie like me to relate to and I'm not sure to what extent video games played a part, if any. Hopefully it's just a phase but in this case, 21 seems a bit old for having no other interests so I worry for his 12 year old brother following a similar path so far. TBH, lockdown seemed to play a part as he went from a kid obsessed with doing speed maths, doing well at school, keen on football, to a very overweight kid always getting excluded from school after they returned. I can't imagine being about 8 and having life turned upside down that way, losing a relative and not being able to see anyone, mainly interacting with friends online. But I'm digressing so I'd better leave it there. I'll dwell on what you say a bit more.
The dilemma: Have a woman but have no peace, always pressured to make her dreams come true and open yourself up for hurtfull failure, Or, Have no woman, diminish your productivity/needs and live a peacefull, organized life.
I’m gonna change up the second part of that dilemma. Don’t have a woman. No problem. Boost up your productivity and become the man you need to be for you and you only. You have been programmed to believe that this world revolves around a man making a woman happy and that’s just pure toxicity when it isn’t reciprocated. Too many men are committing mental and spiritual suicide by being in relationships that aren’t good for them just so they can come home to someone every night and not be alone and they still aren’t happy
I love how he said if she doesnt pay, does she cook for you? Im a high earning woman and I've never dated for looks because intellectual ability has always come first. I used to split dates but now with my childhood best friend / long term partner, I prefer to let him pay while I cook delicious food. I've invested years into building the skill and I got certified in nutrition 7 years ago so that I can eat healthier and make my family healthier Good women will love a "loser", my boyfriend was short and lanky in school, and we were friends then too. He's been a straight shooter and I see a million times the potential in him than shallow insensitive men any day I know its hard as a man Wish you the best
The tough thing here is for those of us who simply can't find a woman worth marrying. It's extraordinarily slim pickings. So many are now out of the question, too much of a risk. Dating hasn't been an issue, dating a woman worth marrying has.
Do you think culturally through the generations, women have become non marrying material partly due to feminism and mistaking being a good partner with being a servant?
That struck me as a surprising comment. I am still single at an old age. I won't mention the number. I tend to look back a lot and I regret blowing it with a few women that were precious and I regret a lot more staying on with mean, selfish manipulators that damaged me and drained me emotionally or financially. I have always looked at marriages and couples that would have conflicts in the open and wondered how that guy could have not foreseen what a mess life was going to become with this woman. You remind me that the best potential wives are few and the rest are not work risking one's future happiness on.
In response to 85% of female elks procreating with the buck with the biggest rack, interestingly, in my hometown, 85% of the males procreated with the woman with the biggest rack, and it only cost a buck. Total, I mean, not each.
Wife says to husband ... we've got no cash , let me go out on the game and make some ... he agrees ... 7am she comes home ,, he's been awake all night worrying ... says to her ... are you ok? ... she replies yes no problems He asks how much did you make ? ... she responds $1001 He replies 1001 !? .... who paid you $1 ? She replies ... they all did
I went to an all boys school and I was a geeky dude that did not know how to even talk to girls. Studied hard, went to college, graduated then joined the USN and had a successful 20 year Navy career. Post Navy I have a great job a beautiful wife and 3 grown kids who are good people.
There needs to be a deep discussion about the people who "don't have the ability, the want, the need to conform to the rules." There are many examples throughout history. I find it disgusting that social labeling is so easily done, it just shows the need that people need a scapegoat to make their egos feel better. To truly test if there are benefits to this kind of acceptance.
Not to over simplify the topic, but there'a a Japanese proverb that says something like, if you chase butterflies they will fly away, but if you build a beatiful garden you will attract them....
If you chase girls, you will lose time and money. If you chase money, girls will chase you 😂
Compassion is important
Maybe society should have given out equal incentives for men and women to go to school to learn to build their gardens. Currently we are telling men, "The butterflies don't need you, they can build their own gardens!" The truth is though, I do not see how an extremely advanced western society can keep functioning if the highly intelligent and hard working men of this generation are never developed into competent members of society. These men were born here, raised here, socalized here, and have all failed en masse. I remember being told that when a racial, ethnic, gender, or sexual orientation group all fails at once that it HAS to be systemic institutionalized discrimination. Based upon the evidence it is discrimination holding men back, but we all decided that some types of discrimination are okay because that group is "privileged." This is a very powerful lesson you are teaching to so many that have nothing to lose.
My garden will be untouchable.
Humans 🤢🤮
@@ReallgeemachineFAILED EN MASSE is the point! But bro, really, "extremely advanced western society"?!😂 Maybe it's a God punishment?? 😮😂 or more simply it's a totally fucked underdeveloped human society?
Ever notice how a woman is never called a loser even if she is one?
How do we continue to keep men distracted if we did that...
or bums, when many of them behave like such
She is called other things. "Whore' comes to mind. "Weird' 'Ugly'. Women are also minimised and dismissed by men.
Huh it shows you’re not a woman!
NO, I have always tended to avoid them, so can't say what happens with women.
Parents should do more to teach social skills. They are more important than school.
As a pretty non social person I 100% agree lol
Sadly I have autism. So socializing is extremely difficult for me
Others' reception to you and your "skills" are limited by how you look
All these famous people are secretly transgendered, G2G Poncho Pete son of man on UA-cam
You can only teach what you know and understand. For a lot of people in pre-internet times life simply fell into place. Your parents bowled you into life, and when they threw straight enough you'd hit something. A mechanistic understanding of the social game just wasn't necessary for a much bigger share of the population than who would need it nowadays.
I was born to a schizophrenic mother and a capable father (that I actually knew) who abandoned me. Eventually ended up being raised by my tyrant, maternal, grandfather & neurotic grandmother. I was daily beaten and threatened with foster care and even had my face rubbed in urine and feces like a dog when a toilet overflowed....now 53, and never have had a significant other or children. Women can spot fucked up guys.....at least I never went to prison, other than the "solitary confinement" I have lived in for my entire life. It's easy to be a loser when you've literally, had to face everything in life by yourself. My acceptance of it occurred many years ago.
May Christ restore your years
@@maxreynolds4243 Michael Paulkovich can help you with that.
Search no meek messiah
Actually, plenty of guys have jobs, wives, and houses--and they're losers too.
I am very sorry you had to go through that, brother. I wish you well man. Be kind to yourself.
Praying for you, please let Jesus heal you.
No man is a loser. I hate when i hear people calling someone a loser. Its a horrible thing to say to someone.
But ive noticed we only refer to men as losers, yet never women.
That's because a man can say "Yep, I'm a loser. I need to make changes in my life." A woman can't handle the hit to her ego. She clings to her innate value as a member of the sought after sex. She picks men to pieces and ridicules them for daring to approach her, while neatly avoiding any and all rejection herself. She does not get rejected, she does the rejecting. If she ever does face real rejection, she's devastated, and often wounded emotionally - sometimes for life.
Many men today seem envious of this "female privilege" of innate value, and loathe the idea we have no innate value and are only loved for what we can provide. And they act shocked when shown the true transactional nature of human nature. After all, did he not think his resourcefulness would "earn" him an attractive partner? Is this really such a painful truth? Or something we really always have known, deep down? If I lived 1,000 lifetimes, I would take "man" every time. Overcoming adversity is what makes me rock solid. Laughing in the face of adversity and those who would call me a loser is the ultimate male privilege.
LOSER! CAN'T GET LAID! CAN'T KEEP A WOMAN! CAN'T MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY! LOSER!!
Their words have no weight, and fall off a real mans shining armor like a dried spit ball.
They have *shaming language*. That's what they have. They are the pitiful ones.
Let them laugh. Let them ridicule. They cannot raise themselves up, so they try to tear you down.
Now tell me again, who the real losers are.
Exactly this.
I would suggest that the definition of a loser is simply someone who has convinced themselves that they are one. At the end of the day, we all win exactly the same thing.
brought up by a dominating female ,who constantly bombards them with negativity ,self fulfilling prophecy
Ben Shapiro doesn't like R. Crumb, thus....
The problem is pretty simple: we were, as a collective, made to believe that, to be valued, we have to be extraordinary (as in out of the ordinary) in at least something.
And the bar for that validation boost is getting higher and higher by the day.
Its pretty clear that thats not sustainable and we're being gaslight into hating ourselves and by extention, the world.
And usually that something is wealth (gals especially faun over guys with the most expensive of toys, bling, etc), great looks (usually tall muscular, the appearance of 20/20 eyesight [though these days, girls tend to be slightly attracted to guys who wear glasses, whether prescription or not, and sunglasses make almost anyone look cooler], etc), a personality that's simultaneously dominant yet docile at the same time, etc.
👍
If the avg IQ was to become 120 does that mean the avg man is a loser? The bar is too high today definitely.
As Chris Rock aptly stated, only women and dogs are loved unconditionally. Men are loved as long as they continue to be able to provide at a sustained, or mostly likely ever increasing level. It is why women hate men they want to partner with playing video games. Oh, the dude they've friendzoned can play them, and she likes being around him, as long his fawning validation never turns to him wanting something more.
The internet ruined it for men. When you’re top 50% of the male population you used to have to compete with just the local men, which would mean statistically you could find a match fairly easily. With social media and dating apps, women can go straight to the top of the chain which crushes the chances of someone in the median which used to do just fine. Women are selectors and they go for the best option they can get. Why would they choose a 50% male when they can get a 20% male?
Actually, most cultures addressed this centuries ago: one mate per person. Women are not allowed to monkey branch.
Really? Is that why porn runs rampant along with “dating” apps? Because everyone is looking for their *1* mate.
Its what it's supposed to be, not what it is. Modern culture is fucked
not anymore
@@gustavokazuma486 And their lies the problem...
@@0scJohnson0 Because they think that they are entitled to their "perfect person"...
No man is a loser if he just gets on with it. I knew a scrawny little boy with glasses. Smart, kind. Totally happy as a junkyard dog(pulling auto parts from wrecks) reconnected with his highschool crush, found out they were still in love with each other, but also best friends. He moved up to jiffy lube, a regular auto shop, constantly taking night classes then maintenance at the airport, then steel composites, then development at the space port, then working on the space shuttle. Had a brilliant beautiful daughter.He still does free car maintenance for family friends. Loves his wife, owns his home is only 40 years old. Nobody saw the potential that boy had. Don't accept your fate. Just put one foot in front of the other every day. Love and be loved honestly.
Thank you ❤
That is very sweet of you to say. Thank you.
They don't use the space shuttle and haven't for a long time. Your story is a fabricated lie full of cliche tropes
"Moved up to Jiffy Lube"? ROTFLMAO. In the world of auto repair, Jiffy Lube is as far down at the bottom as you can go. Saying you work at Jiffy Lube is like saying you have a job cleaning public restrooms with your tongue
@@joecummings1260 Read the rest of the comment. You got stuck on the wrong part.
Not only are men in this nation playing against a stacked deck. But they are now being charged a monthly fee for the use of the cards.
All men know what sex appeal is when it comes to women but they don't seem to realize that it goes both ways. They have known women that don't fit the typical standard of beauty but drip that sort of appeal. It's not always the broad shouldered quarterback that is the most alluring. Confidence plays a big role.
The gaslighting against men is enormous.
@@kathyhansen2820oh shut up
@@kathyhansen2820 You just said a bunch of whole nothing
@@shadyeighty1 Yeah, like his master. At least he learned something from Peterson.
I remember working with a bloke, reminded me of MR Burns, he was highly intelligent but was void of social skills. Poor bloke got bullied every day constantly, sometimes he would ask to be left alone. I thought it was pathetic that they wouldn't give him peace. Got a call from a friend 3 years later telling me our mutual friend flipped and took the steel tube from the Hoover and battered the 3 guys harassing him. I believe they were rushed to hospital. Poor bloke eventually let the rage out.
Dude is probably having the time of his life now
You keep turning the heat up on that saucepan sooner or later its gonna spill out
@@CrystalShip8899 Ive met a few types like that. Usually when I try to teach them basic social skills that can protect them they refuse to listen. I had my entire world model changed by people that willingly choose to suffer instead of making even the most minor of changes, or to stand up for themselves after I have done 99% of the work by telling their bully off.
Did they crumple beneath the blows from his powerful Mr Burns physique or rupture something from laughing too hard at some Mr Burns like man attempting to best them physically?
@@EarlMcManus2005 I was a few hours away by car so didn't actually see it, just heard from a good friend his victim's were rushed to hospital. He got bullied terribly because of his demeanor, amongst other things like his sister was stunning but he clearly wasn't. I think the worst joke that was played on him was that he was hung like a horse but had a face for radio.
In my experience I've only met maybe 2 women who actually seemed like women I'd be interested in pursuing a relationship with, and for the two I met, each at different points in my life, I found myself to be poorly inadequate. A real sense of "I am not all I could be, or even enough to justify burdening her with myself". Since then my focus has been on myself, sorting out my mind and life, becoming someone I see as worthy of the kind of woman I am interested in. I just turned 27, and still am a work in progress, but I'm not chasing the idea that just anyone's company will magically fix things, and even if a life long romantic relationship isn't in the cards, I'm still bettering myself for my own sake and the sake of every other life I happen to come in contact with. Who you choose to be matters, in all aspects of life.
Totally agree
We're all gonna make it Brah!
Right there with ya
You're not gonna find the kind of woman you built yourself up for in the US or the western world . Their minds have all been poisoned if you want a loyal loving dedicated wife that will respect and honor you I would suggest going to Southeast Asia to find a wife
Hmmm yeah... Well if by the age of 27 there are only 2 women you've met in your life that meet your idea of relationship material maybe you really do need to look at yourself. That is definitely an issue, not just who you see yourself as. I'm not saying this to be a dick, but to highlight that only 2 in 27 years really points to the "I have standards" equivalent women get called out for. Yeah there are standards and there are unrealistic standards.
My parents divorced when I was 8 and my brother was 6. My dad took care of everything because my mother was mentally ill. At 12 years old she moved to Mexico and my dad moved back into our home. It wasn't perfect, but it was a lot better than dealing with my mom. When I was almost 16 years old, my mother moved back from Mexico. I wanted to help my dad take care of my mom and ended up taking on way too much of her responsibility in the process. Many years later at 45--and on my second divorce--I came to realize that I had essentially married two women who were shit birds just like my mom--and I made a change. I decided that I could never save my mom--or these two women--and that I was going to reach out to My Savior. At 45 I became a Christian and my life has been ten times better. So much of the New Testament made sense to me for the first time and I know live with so much more peace. Thanks for reading. Roy, So Cal.
Amen
I had a friend with an alcoholic dad, and in hindsight, he acted like his mothers husband.
@@JonathanLopezUT I bet he was a Firstborn. Am I right? It's very easy for the oldest--both boys and girls--to take on the role of a surrogate in a divorced, dysfunctional, or death situation.
@@goodtalker yes he was the first born thank you
42. Starting to reach some of the conclusions.
I was a long term "loser" mostly due to the fact that I felt as if the incentive reward for average males in society like me was not worth the reward. I then got my life together and basically had all these assumptions proven true with experience. After a couple of years of full time work and dating (even successfully) I was completely disillusioned. The only thing this world wants from you as a male is to take up the role of essentially a willing mule without question. Perhaps this worked it a functioning society where toil would actually sustain a decent lifestyle but now it's simply broken. I'm back to being a "loser" again and I'm happier than when I "functioned" in the world.
So pretty much you tried being a normie, and you were still if not more miserable.
You didnt have to become a work mule to notice that the social contract is broken. Men must fulfill their duties but women do not need to fulfill a thing. Im sure you wouldnt mind much at all if you had a woman that dutifully fulfilled her side of the contract by being a loyal, chaste, problem solving mother to your children. Sadly now a days the bad advice culture for women is so mainstream and so toxic that nearly every female is bombarded with this crab in a bucket mentality from fem-ism. What human being cant be manipulated with the promise that you are morally justified in doing whatever you want because you are a permanent and perpetual victim? I am convinced this is female intra-sexual competition on steroids though. The worse it gets with childlessness and broken relationships the more women will push hate and bad ideas onto girls until every woman in the world is deeply traumatized and depressed. Humans try to normalize their trauma by traumatizing others instead of dealing with their faults and becoming better.
Very honest and insightful. The whole thing is a trap. You have to really try to shut your eyes as hard as you can to not see it if you have even more than a couple brain cells to rub together.
Yeah. Thats what he said.
All these famous people are secretly transgendered, G2G Poncho Pete son of man on UA-cam
I grew up in a culture where a girl gets pregnant at 16 and the State pays for her apartment , food , and medical .
The boyfriend lives with her and gives her more children .
Soon is a three bedroom house and nobody ever had a job .
Horrendous.
Especially comes tax time
must be the UK
The gypsies?
Where?
A loser is only a man that lets being called a loser get to him.
👏👏👏
If you have an idea of the woman you want to be your partner, cultivate yourself to be the man this kind of woman would want. If you have an idea of the man you want to be your partner, cultivate yourself to be the kind of woman he would want. Then go where that kind of man/woman would be. It's that simple. That quality of person is unlikely to be hanging out at a bar, or displaying themselves as a sexual player online.
I agree.
The only rational thing to do is aim to be something your ideal partner would desire.
Everyone understands this when it comes to getting into school or getting a job.
Somehow, they reject the idea the moment they're talking about sexual partners, then they feel entitled to a CEO job despite being unqualified.
lol that quality of person is exactly at a bar for me, but that’s because of the path I’m on ;)
I think the first step is to make sure what you think you want is actually what you want and not just the voices of others speaking in place of your own.
The relationship advice equivalent of “dress for the job you want, not the job you have”
How would you know what type of man your ideal woman would want, and how do you know where these hypothetical women would hypothetically exist?
''with money in your pocket, u are attractive, u are intelligent, and u sing well too''
Money is a mind altered substance.
True, but don’t be sad you can make more money you can’t make more time.
Alcohol does the same.
All these famous people are secretly transgendered, G2G Poncho Pete son of man on UA-cam
Not like that at all
I believed half of my life, that I am a looser. Now I am old and I can compare my victories and my defeats with those of other men and I can see, that I was just an average man. Even a bit above average. The problem of a lot of young men and women is, that they compare themselves with movie heroes. From this viewpoint a lot of movies for teen audiences are really toxic.
@@schurlbirkenbach1995 Agreed…
Same. From age 15-25 I thought I was a loser. I took inventory of my situation: ~3 years of banking, a gf who said I’d shine barstools with my ass, and a union family who always cheered for a failure. One cold night, I dumped em. I took that big job in NYC, moved to Brooklyn, and said adios to many women (in my periphery). Boy was this a reverse uno. As for the women, I never had so many (from my old town) wanting to visit me. Weird.
Please clarity. What does “shine barstools with your ass” mean?
I AM MORE THAN THE URGE TO REPRODUCE
"SILENCE WENCH! I do not wish to be horny anymore; I just want to be happy..."
Is this what he’s pushing? Jordan is becoming a clown.
@@Spartan-Of-Truthmaybe listen and form your own opinion instead of taking someone else's interpretation and opinion as your own. Troglodyte
@@runswithraptors Cute little projection.
No, humans are simple designed for that use only!
The kind of woman you want is a good person on a deep level. That's someone you can build a life and family with.
where do these kind reside? or even exist?
@@johnbreedlove3245 they won't be found anywhere you are, that you can be certain of. Ldar
@@johnbreedlove3245 in their own circles, often meeting a mate before they even leave home. Certainly not in a bar full of alcoholics. Try church, if you are into the occult, or groups for various things with meetups. Flirt with the cashiers at the stores and let them know you are interested. Women are lonely, too. Just like men, they are often not attracted to the people who are attracted to them. Women with kids can be especially interested, because a lot of the men they meet are very turned off by them having a child already. You have to try, and when you get a date, do not turn sour if she is not the one, or ghosts you, or whatever. Just move along to the next potential partner until you find one that you can put up with and who can put up with you. There are million people out there that would make a fine partner for you, unless you are especially obnoxious, and you will find one when you least expect it. You will look into each others' eyes and you will know right away, "this person likes what they see!". As a man, you are lucky. You can initiate the game. She, on the other hand, may feel she has to wait for you to initiate and if you do not.... then nothing happens. :(
a fantasy creature, a magical unicorn
i think the good, and the evil in us runs deep, right to the bottom of our soul.
Our evil is necessary for us to survive and sustain others.
But, I'm also a bit of a loser myself.
The title of this video sucks. It doesn’t even explain the pathology of losers. Crumb wasn’t a loser at all in the end, but his family is a real testament of a dysfunctional family of social awkwardness and yes, despair. Honestly, it angers me the whole reduction of calling people losers. These males need more compassion and support than “your way life of pathological and you should get over it.”
Are you kidding? Crumb was the one who saw that in himself. That's the point and specifically what Jordan gets at. Don't always blame others or "the other" for situations - take ownership.
The term "loser" only applies to men. I remember in high school one kid called me a loser, and this was back in the early 90's. Well, fast forward 30 something years, and I got a steady job, pay my bills, law abiding citizen, never been married nor have children, and I am 47, so according to Jordan Peterson, since I am not married nor had kids, that makes me a "loser" then. And I have been rejected left and right by women for the most part.
I mean sex and relationships is kind of the point for 99.9 percent of people. But I don’t think he is saying you are a loser, he is saying if being successful is something you really want and you are having trouble with that, it’s probably you.
@@zachz69999.9 percent of people who think like a monkey.
"Post-nut clarity" is definitely a thing.
Yeah it's called shame lol
@@L_E_L_0_U_Pnah you can lose shame actually 😅
It’s like being a warewolf and turning back into human form. Resenting most the 💩 you did
@@hugh2hoob668you never lose it, you just delude yourself into burrying it deeper down causing future problems.
@@L_E_L_0_U_P lol I don't have any, get your shit together
I have never thought of anyone as a "loser". I love all people. We all have incredible value as human beings. Every single one of us.
Yes, but it is easier for evil or ruthless people with big ego to label others as "losers", instead of seeing them as the complex human beings with personal struggles and dignity that they in reality are.
The line is “that all changed when I got famous” he smiles, quite aware of the irony and that it makes him seem like a misanthrope. Crumb is nothing if not self aware.
I had a similar experience when I moved abroad and it really made me struggle with bitterness. Fortunately I still maintained a sense of wisdom and was sort of able to distinguish between the women who were attracted to me for good reasons and bad ones and met my wife. I think a lot of the bitterness from men is the realization that they have to play this superficial game that's really hard to win to attract women. And playing the game itself can corrupt ones soul.
@@tyloniussquib4000glad to hear you overcame that. Yes I think if we become “better” at living combining your self reflection and a bit of discipline (social fluency and solid friendships would also be essential) the mating game becomes a bit easier. Terrible to have to mold oneself according to feedback from women we’re attracted to.
@@careyyost4981 Mother nature wants men to do this. She wants us to mold ourselves to be desirable to the women we find attractive. Now, it's very often a recipe for some very expensive misery, but... MOST men will always be willing to play that game. For me, after a younger life full of conquest, I now can say that the curse for me has been lifted. I have been woman free for almost 11 years now. Woman free. Debt free. Cancer free. I'm just.... free.
"Crumb" is indeed quite a document. It has been said that the filmmaker was really more interested in making a movie about Robert Crumb's brother Charles, than about his friend Robert. It was Robert's fame or infamy that made the movie possible.
Not to mention the directors impressive tenacity. Who was not above threatening suicide as a means of keeping Robert onboard with the project.
Interstingly, Robert Crumb was actually somewhat successful before his lifelong adventure as king of the underground cartoonists. And married. To one of his dream women. Before meeting a genuinely beautiful version of his dream woman and marrying her.
What's more, Robert was friends with another "loser" who also wound up with a movie being made about him. A movie based on his work, actually. Harvey Pekar. Work which basicly reads like a documentary in cartoon form. The movie is "American Splender," and is the perfect companion piece to "Crumb."
Great comment and spot on. Terry Zwigoff directed those as well as the film version of Ghost World by artistic loser Dan Clowes.
@@ciscornBIG See also Art School Confidential.
Very much interested in your observations. I never heard that stuff about the main aim being Charles. Zwigoff threatened suicide??? Thanks.
I haven't seen "Crumb"--but, have seen "American SPlendor", a wonderful documentary. Will certainly look for "Crumb" (and I'm a woman).
perfect comment
"On your date ask her about her previous boyfriends (and girlfriends and cats and dogs) and ask her if it was her fault that the relationships failed" brilliant master level dating advice, has he ever actually interacted with a woman? Yes, ask her to her face if she is to blame for being dumped by her ex on your first date.
Lol, yeah.. no matter her answers - no second date!!
quite frankly, if she's had a bf before, then that's already a deal breaker.
@@ysf-d9i you're a funny little character
@@Konqy it's a sad state of the world that normalcy is seen as "funny" while degeneracy is seen as normal.
Yeah that was hilarious. It was a wth? I could not believe this guy gives advice on relationships - then noticed his book carefully propped up in the background. It's on divorce. You have to reach one hell of a bitterness level to want to write a book on it. It's still in his eyes.
Interesting discussion. That analogy using the elks rack reminded me of this old Miller Lite commercial where a guy goes to a bowling alley and asks for size 10 shoes but is told the only pair left is size 13. He goes ahead a rents those even though he doesn't want to then he sits down and spots some women sitting near him. He smiles at them and raises his beer but they laugh at the guy in that unique way only women can, that get lost loser sort of condensation. The guy dips his shoulders, sighs in resignation knowing everyone from the shoe guy to these women have zero respect for him, then he puts his feet with those big old size 13 shoes up and the women all do a double take, changing their expression as a horse neighing sound effect is played. The point is clear and it was quite edgy for a commercial but it spoke to a certain amount of truth when it comes to people and their superficial shallow desire for gratification.
But it also spoke to a deeper is issue, respect. I haven't learned as much as I would have liked these past several decades but if a young man asked my advice on the matter of getting by in the world and selecting a good and decent woman to take the journey with I would tell him to adhere to certain to precepts, deal-breakers if you will. First, never let anyone else define who you are. There are enough honest and decent people out there but a whole bunch of them will project all kinds of negative traits on to you and those are the ones that seem to take root. I'm not saying you shouldn't accept valid criticism, just don't let someone apply the loser tab to you. Two, don't hang around with anyone who disrespects you, especially women. She may be a knock out who is great in the sack but if she doesn't respect you she will leave or step out. And as they point out here, if she has a history of disrespecting men or has had multiple relationships understand she will treat you the same way. Walk away from women like that. Realize you can't fix or change anyone except yourself. If you act like a victim people will treat you like one and later on down the road all you get for the effort is a bunch of resentments that flood in like a tsunami. Parents can play all sorts of mind-games on their kids, but how long someone carries that baggage around is up to them.
As if being married with or without children excludes you from being a loser.
Thank you. I thought the exact same thing.
Don't listen to Peterson.
It doesn’t instantly make you a winner, but having a partner and/or children does make you less of a loser.
@@marekszewczyk3208 his lectures pre-fame were good.
@@haveaseatsir that's only true in some cases.
I gave up on dating to focus on myself. Now I'm where I want to be, but I still don't want to date.
Exactly. I've worked hard to get where I am. There is no incentive for me to risk that on a relationship where she hasn't worked to get to this point, but can get half because of the power of the vagina.
I'm on my own. Let them do the same. I figured out what I want and kids aren't part of the picture. If I don't want kids, I don't need a woman.
Amen! I am in the exact same situation as you, and honestly? It feels amazing.
Love it when the channel removes a comment, yet you still get notifications regarding a thread. Free speech advocate my ass.
what about the intimacy needs?
@@jen-gv7tx Once a man learns to control & quell the sexual impulse, you'd be surprised how little sway women hold.
Sex isn't hard to find, and intimacy in terms of closeness & sharing thoughts is ill-advised when those thoughts are shared with a woman. Everything you say can & will be used against you, so the risk outweighs the reward.
I trust Farrell on this issue a little more than Peterson….It’s up to men to see the mating game as a rigged game & see yourself as a kind of winner for not participating in something which can lead to your own demise…..between the (low) quality of many western women & the near misandry of our institutions, entertainment, etc…a growing number of men are refusing to play a game that has very few real winners anyway.
No excuses. Good and bad exist in every culture!
@@8Ayelet that sounds like a middle ground fallacy - assuming that there are equal parts of good and bad women in every culture, and discarding the possibility of there being a real social and cultural problem with women's beliefs and behaviour towards men nowadays.
The term "Loser" means someone who either does not want to conform to society's success rules or one who doesn't have the ability to.
Non-conforming with contribution is fine. Artists and inventors often don’t conform but they do contribute. But refusing to conform and contribute while demanding something in return is rather useless.
@@chamuuemura5314an artist who sells a lot of paintings is considered a success. Another artist who does not, some people call a "loser", one who tried tp play the art game and was not able to get paid or rewarded in some way for it. (this assuming they also did not have anything else going on that developed into "success" level)
@sat1241possibly also on the autistic spectrum.
there needs to be a deep discussion about the people who "don't have the ability, the want, the need to conform to the rules." There are many examples throughout history.
@@davidspringer4019I find the term "loser"
is most used by less empathetic people
I understand the points Jordan Peterson makes in this video about men taking necessary steps to make themselves more attractive to the opposite sex. However, in today’s Western society, with its disenfranchisement of men and the influence of technology on male and female dynamics, more and more high-quality men are opting out of the dating game and choosing to remain single.
I don't believe men are the problem anymore. The issue is far more complex than just shaming men for not participating in the system. It's no wonder that MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) is still popular and potentially growing.
Most men are going after the wrong women, most women are going after the wrong men
Most men are invisible to a lot of woman. And most woman are all going for the same top men.
Pretty much sums up what's wrong with us all.
I concur.
Sounds almost profound until you think about it for a second
That's really not as smart as you want to believe it is.
Everyone tends to chase after what they consider the best, and humans tend to somewhat agree on who are the best, and most of the time, you're not good enough to get the best.
It's hard to get strong without properly suffering, there are lessons to be learned in defeat, the harder the better, if you have enough fortitude eventually you become adamant.
Not necessarily
@@weemikeyd Elaborate ?
Crum's life story tells us less about loser men than it provides keen insight into how useless most women really are at judging the value of others.
Well most women are now told and taught to be men. Of course they are going to suck at doing a man's work. The problem is that they not see the flagellation of their femininity as a problem because it adheres to their emotional values of doing what they feel like doing.
I was diagnosed with Tourette’s syndrome when I was 19; I have been rejected by every girl I ever expressed interest in. Now, at 50, I’m single, broke, living alone in a shit-hole apartment, strung-out on psychoactive medications, and having difficulty holding a job. Plus, I have been attending junior college off and on since 1993 and I only have 13 credits. I was bullied by my alcoholic older brother growing up along with certain hooligans from the neighborhood and high school. Thus, I have problems forming relationships with people. Should I just say, “the hell with it all” and give up? HELL NO!!
Whaat! You Inspire me 👑 "HELL NO!!"
I read all this and my thoughts are that your strength and tenacity is astounding and obviously god-given. Peace be with you man and may your persistence pay off. When you ask the question “should I just say to hell with it all and give up?” I read it as something you may have asked yourself over and over again throughout life. I know I have. The thing is that there is nothing to quit to, when whatever lies ahead always promises better things, mysterious as the future may be. It’s up to us what happens. God bless.
Your mindset is so amazing bro, so many people would’ve given up a long time ago in your situation. Never give up👍
A difficulty leaving one's mother and becoming independent is the real problem plaguing humanity
Especially when society is rigged so that the boy is forced to become a child husband to the single mother (who probably kicked the father out).
My Grandmother took a long time to die, my Uncle spent the best part of his life living with and taking care of her. He's still single.
what about if your mother is all alone and you are all she has?
@@gordanator2060 smart man
@@rick-ry3kj you have to get out and learn to live with other people while taking care of your mother.
Warren Farrell’s point at the end is exactly right. Do you actually want to pay what it costs to attract all women? Or do you want to pay what it costs to be yourself, and attract whomever that happens to attract?
Well said! I feel like we really need to RE-WRITE DATING ECPECTATIONS. Too much (avoidable!) BITTERNESS being created!!!
I think if anybody has experienced the lowest lows and high highs that person, if they are honest , become wiser, and if they are good, more compassionate
The Crumb documentary looks at this
I grew up with this girl a few doors down in our Sudbury mining village.She was a quiet, beautiful modest girl but a strong sigma wolf that guys didn't mess with.One day at our High School,.... Angela rounded a corner and found a student that was picking on our version of a Robert Crumb.Angela,... sprang into action and backed the bully up against the lockers and the bully coward. She is empathic morally kind and full of authentic charcter. she impressed me back the in the 1970's and I eventually waited in turn to date her in 1979 and then married her by 1984. I can only wonder how would Robert Crumb would draw her heroism and kindness as a a defender of the nerds in the High School hallway or on the street ?
Thank you, JP, for providing free insight and remaining a man of integrity all this time.
I know so many guys who are in a relationship where they are not happy in. But just because it’s all they can get.
You can get peace of mind in solitude. Many women are doing that and are branded as evil, when they are only growing some dignity.
Please have some dignity and don't settle for something that makes you unhappy.
@@pwnagenuss That is dumb they should just have boundaries and leave the situation as well. If its really abusive and toxic they are better off alone.
Same with women. We have to be straight and square with ourselves, first. Then the right relationship comes, when both people are ready to augment their lives.
@@jimpanse1638well, you say the same thing I did just in a different way. I agree.
Well if they are ina relationship because it's all they could get then why not prove they are worth more? Cant you be happy where you are at? It takes work but so does keeping a woman who is high end so I guess you get what you put in
Cannot relate I’m perfect it’s everybody else’s fault
Unironically
You made me smile.
@@Ruby_Villainhe’s kidding.
same
@fowchiiiliedpuppiesdied whoosh
He’s making a joke too.
It's a fascinating documentary. His brother who was living in the mom's basement is briefly interviewed and while noticeably disarrayed, it was obvious he was very intelligent. The way he went out was horrific.
If my parents had given me away for adoption, I would have had a wife and children by now. Also, if internet had been around when I was a kid, maybe I would have been able to figure things out instead of being completely alone in the world with no information available anywhere.
It cannot be underestimated how much harm parents can do to their children.
Being adopted would have been the single best thing that could have happened to me.
I've said many times that "Crumb" is my favorite documentary. Final takeaway for me is the razor thin line between a successful artist and the tragic lives of his brothers featured in the film. It's a very funny film too. I just quoted Robert's sadly now deceased wife, speaking of her mother- "honey, have you got any Sweet N Low?" If you've seen it you know. "Who painted that?" " I did Mom, remember you put me through art school?"
"Coats groomed. Claws sharp. May your snouts lead you to bright treasures, hidden in the dark."
The narcissism of others will mould you into sociopaths.
From sheep sheared, we become wolves, and from wolves, we may become lions.
You as men should not seek to become food/hosts for parasites.
Yes, don't be weak and safe. Be a capable monster, but know how to contain it.
Where is this quote from, it's wonderful
@@gilraybaker826 My personal reflections/experiences.
The abyss changes you, if you can find your way.
Endure, and adapt.
Not a loser just free. Dysfunction ends with me. No more Narcissism, false pride, deception, cowardice ,pettiness or selfishness.
I think the man is missing the point. Dr Peterson is gently reminding men that women are the choosers. So many men are so happy with the potential of being able to have sex that they will put up with unbelievable behavior and sociopathy in order to get it. I’ve watched this with the men in my life for over 50 years. I’ve never had a discussion with any of these men in which they’ve actually interviewed these women and watched their behavior to the point of ultimately rejecting them based on said behavior. No, they dove in blindly and then found out down the road that the woman was seriously deranged. I was even told that a crazy woman was fun. I’m guessing they mean sexually, but that is such a small portion of a relationship. Men’s standards have dropped significantly and women’s have risen. In this switcheroo, women’s behavior has plummeted astronomically. What a world we live in!
The men who say women only go for bad boys are the exact same men that only go for crazy chicks and get ‘bored’ by anyone stable.
Yes, it is amazing. I would say most every man in a relationship has taken the "at any cost" mindset. From the moment they get married, they will have no money or savings. She spent it all. Also she rules with insane demands. I saw my mother act like that and my father just put up with it.
Sometimes a man is so completely devoid of female affection, companionship and intimacy (and no, i dont mean just sex, although that is a factor) for whatever reason the they will treasure any chance they get, ive met some guys with shitty social skills, not very good appearance and, while they had a lot of intresting things about them, they werent adventurous or "exciting" in many ways even though i enjoy their company. We all talk about responsability and standards and i agree with it, but lets remember that some guys just dont get better options.
Yea - he is starting his narrative in current western society. Completely ignoring how the human race was able to survive and procreate for centuries. If women are the choosers - they suck - and are destroying society before our very eyes. It's no longer the top 10% - they are now selective to the top 5% - and the most rude petulant a-holes to all other men.
@@ianduarte1992 This skin-deep empathy is a way to justify a nihlistic attitude and cope with your enslavement to base desires. Christ FTW
At the risk of being pendantic, I've been a hunter and wildlife photographer for over 50 years; and I've never heard the male elk called a "buck". They've been widely referred to as "bulls", like male cows.
Robert Crumb as far as I am concerned is a genius amd probably the worlds greatest graphic artist. I have been a fan of his artwork since the early 70's , Fritz the Cat, Mr Narural, Flakey Foont, Angel Food McSpade, Whiteman meets Bigfoot - Don Whiteman & Yeti and so on.
Another great artist of the same era is S Clay Wilson - The Checkered Demon, Capt. Pissgums and his Pervert Pirates and of course the incomparable ' Ruby the Dyke vs Weedman" .
I am eternally grateful to these artists for ths hours of mind bending fun poring of their artwork and for Robert Crumb's love of American Roots music, it was through him and his artwork that got me turned on to the Delta Blues and old accoustic country blues in general, one of the great loves of my life - thanks Robert.
Most the people who view themselves as “losers” are actively making their matters worse or doing nothing to improve it. At some point you have to be be honest on if you’re holding yourself to the same standards you demand from a partner.
I was also considered a loser in HS so I certainly appreciate this video, went to Engineering school and found a wonderful woman in college, got married and had two beautiful kids - really happy now!
A woman treating you with contempt doesn't make you a loser.
My ex-wife did
No, unless thats the only interaction you get.
If you treat her like shit and or just as a sex object and not a friend then her rejection of you is CORRECT!
In the case of Crumb, not one, all. Until he got famous.
Yet contempt for women does.
🤔
We look outside so much we forget to look within for the answers we need. We seek, we chase, and we dream, but so often none of that is what we honestly want.
Very true
I think they key is knowing when to stop. I climbed the academic ladder until it was no fun anymore, and that's when I stopped. Felt better after that. Glad I got as far as I did, but also glad I didn't try to keep going when it was time to find something different.
Have you thought about going on a speaking tour of all male schools , boarding schools and military schools? In today’s world they need to hear a good message. I have a nephew who I felt was an odd duck , well that changed when he met his wife ! Never saw him the same again , he was so happy and in love. It was such a transition!!!
All these famous people are secretly transgendered, G2G Poncho Pete son of man on UA-cam
I came from an abusive family and putting me down. Everytime a good, beautiful woman shows interest in me. I either sabatoge or not engage. Cause I never good enough and not to cause the pain.
I've experienced that level of detestment from women in my life and actually did eventually overcome it it left me for a period of time grappling with a great deal of bitterness towards women in general. Ironically I met my wife during this. Who is a saint and this honestly helped me overcome bitterness while remaining realistic. I'll never make excuses for people but we really do live in a society that gives almost consideration to men and their struggles. Also I would highly recommend any men's day as far as possible from low-run positions in female dominated industries. I hate to call people NPCs but the reality is is women are just sort of programmed to treat men lower than them with absolute disdain these are people who can go on and manage your family and be civil in other matters but for some reason they just can't stop themselves from punching down I still don't understand it and I suppose because of that some level of bitterness remains in my heart.
I've also received, even in my own home by my sister. She'd say I was ugly. In the school I could feel the way I was treated, with the utmost disrespect even by the female teachers.
This has decreased, as I matured and got better looking and better ajusted, but the wound won't ever completely heal.
Never once have I spoke to woman that admitted any accountability. Literally never once
THe same goes with men.
Same here.
You must be in a certain type of community
Well, you haven't met me.
that says more about you and who you're around lmao
The best dating advice I've ever heard: ATTRACTION ISN'T A CHOICE
Corey Wayne quote perhaps?
How is that advice? It is at best a bald assertion.
@@AllAhabNoMobyin the context of this video it is advice. Watching the documentary you see how Crumb grows up to hate women. And Jordan points to the fact that he harbors resentment towards the time when they didn't feel attracted to him. Once you accept that attraction isnt a choice the resentment should go together with it.
😮@@Ruby_Villain
@@Ruby_Villain free will doesn't exist.
“Crumb” is one of my favorite films. The filmmaker was Terry Zweigoff, a friend of Robert’s. Crumb’s comics on women is rough. I saw it when it came out with a lefty crowd. They had a tough time of it.
I grew up with a dad who admired his comics. And my dad thought they were funny and I as a teenage girl was being sensitive. And my dad is a lefty hippie.
I saw the Crumb documentary in the 90s. Incredibly fascinating.
Worked my way through life's challenges & hit each milestone/expectation along the way...after 20+ years of it, I am beyond disillusioned. Don't waste your time, gentlemen. Just find some meaning in life that belongs to you and you alone, take whatever easy lays come your way, but don't bother going out of your way for it...there's no pot of gold at the end of the rainbow of lies. I'd rather go back to being a loser over being a used fool.
Many men who did everything they were told to do are ejected from family, ejected by friends, and ejected by society.
There is only one person to please and that's the man in the mirror. And by please I don't mean vain or selfish pursuits.
By please, I mean only the man in the mirror can validate the man in the mirror.
Most of what society asks of us men to do, we really don't need to do.
People who regularly say "I don't care what society thinks." very often do.
When you really don't care - and shrug off social expectations and serve your own purpose, then you are really free.
Me personally, I am not on any social media and never been on dating apps. I live in a world city, one of the wealthiest in culture, history and economics. People call me handsome and intelligent. I rarely have romantic relationships. My principles and self narrative restrict my options. It’s hard to find the balance between what ideals you hold and being realistic. The art of compromise, negotiation, trust, forgiveness is lost. I’m ambivalent about sticking to my values and conforming to the social paradigm of the 21th century.
Yes me too, I don't believe in modern society but as a member of modern society I also depend on it for my survival. It has become impossible for me to participate in a society I whole heartedly do not believe in.
Too many people would rather “exist” in the digital world than live in the real one.
@@hello1943 FACTS !!!!
I gave you a thumbs up, so don't be an ingrate. You and I are part of one social medium: UA-cam. I occasionally watch YT channels that feature footage from Tik Tok. "Crumb" is a great doc, but I've only seen it once, and I am not in a hurry to run out and rent it again.
You are literally commenting on a social media app.
I just want to say that I loved every comment I was able to read on this. Humanity is definitely not without reproach. This is the kind of stuff that gives it the light it needs to see through the darkness and help find it's way back.
I think I'm one of those "male losers" I'm 29. Single. When I look back, I think the turning point for me was my Auto immune disease. As a kid I was very good at sports, and VERY GOOD at arts. (Drawing in particular) I was always in a group of friends. But when disease hit, I started to back away from everyone. Isolate myself. Also had a strong mother that divorced with alcoholic father and raised us alone. So as years went by my auto immune disease got worse and worse. made my skin look worse and worse. That led to me being more and more embarrassed of my body. Those stupid thoughts got in to the head... "I'm not good enough", "I'm ugly", "there is no way any girl will like some one like me" this led to less and less social interactions. Also technology like (PC Gaming) came along to assist that lack of social interactions. This continued to snowball after graduation and in to later life. So as of today... I work, I make money, I pay my bills, I play my games, I do what ever I want. And when I see an attractive woman, in a workplace or in public, I just walk pass as its not even there. I know nothing going to happen anyway. So why even bother trying. And even if some one liked me, would I be willing to sacrifice my freedom and my time for other person. I know I'm not alone in this situation.
(Don't mind my bad English, not native)
Your English is much better than that of many native English speakers.
Search charlene anderson beats lyme
Inspiring story.
You assume an attractive woman does not have had any health or autoimmune situations herself. Could just say “hello”. Don’t expect anything…just be friendly instead of angry. I have an autoimmune disease. My beautiful cousin the same. Don’t assume.
Yesterday and today I posted a comment here, but both times it has been deleted or censored.
I hope this test comment remains. If it does I'll try again.
Your English is much better than that of many native English speakers.
Search charlene anderson beats lyme
Inspiring story.
I reposted the original comment again. It was gone when I refreshed the page. Shameful.
I'll try again. This time the person's name will be in the initial characters of the groups of short words.
Reminds me of the episode of The Simpsons when Homer goes to NYC to retrieve his booted car, gets fed up with the frustrating process of getting it removed and effectively destroys the car by removing the boot with a jackhammer. Hilarious yet highly symbolic as an analogue to men and dating. Men will completely destroy their lives just to get laid and not be perceived as a loser.
Whether you are a Winner or Loser has been determined by your 5th birthday, by a mixture of one's genetics and one's early experiences
If a Winner, one has a choice between being a kindly Winner, building others up; or being a cruel Winner, putting others down.
If a Loser, one has a choice between being a good-natured Loser trying to make a contribution and being helpful to others; or being an ill-natured Loser destroying oneself and/or others.
This is a loser comment.
I would have liked to get married, but for a whole raft of reasons, didn't.
When I reached my sixties, it became clear that if I'd had a family to support (even partly) and bring up, the worries - and practical burdens - would have killed me.
Thus I'm still alive through having always been an unattached bachelor.
And on the biblical principle that "A living dog is better than a dead lion" (Ecclesiastes 9:4), I'm successful.
Thank you for your comment
It adds a lot of value for me
That being said when you're in your 30's and 40's - with the current divorce rate - I think it becomes much easier to find a partner who already has children
Exactly because having children no longer has anything to do with it
So here I am being forced to filter all these single moms and divorced or insane women in order to find one who I can and want to have children with
While you are heavily emphasizing the having children aspect as if it is standing out in your raft of reasons
But after reproductive age it no longer has that much to do with marriage
There's plenty to go around for you
Not wanting to have children does not mean in the slightest that you can't have a proper marriage
So that is the part that seems contradictory to me
It's like these two things are glued together for you in a way that doesn't seem all that natural to me
Good that the aim of human life is not to become a "winner" but to unite with God.
By uniting with God you're becoming a winner. You're burning out all the needless stuff. Just have glance at the other side of the yard to see those under the devil's grasp.
crumbs brother max surely is in that path, been an ascetic monk for decades now
lol righto
beautifully articulated
Krishnamurti: “It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.”
An author similar to Crumb is Christoffer Nielsen. Comic writer from the same era, based out of Norway, not really a suffering man himself but with plenty of those around him, his brother included. A main theme of his dark humor being "how things can go wrong", he took it upon himself to describe the psyche of drug abusers among many other things. That attracted a morbid fascination here in Norway so a theatrical play became animated shorts by name of "To Trøtte typer" ("Two Worn Out Guys") and then the full length movie "Free Jimmy". The international crowd wasn't used to that kind of humor, however so it was a flop. If you have a fascination for mind boggling failure, however, it's well worth a watch. Or, I even think you can see "To Trøtte Typer" for free if you search it up.
Thanks
I am over 50 fit and have never struggled with sleeping with woman until recently.
The last 3 timed I have been propositioned have been by woman in a marriage or relationship. One with the guy at home looking after their kid. (no I didn't x 3)
I have daughters and keep an interest in the way they perceive men. It's not good! It's not good for all of us. Kiss good bye to a monogamous relationship on the whole. They have been called "unicorns" for a reason. For these content creators who say it has always been like this. This is just not true.
When you push degeneracy into the multitude you get what you get.
Why would any guy risk everything for what is now an abstract image of what long term love is?
Because as a person, you ought to trust your partner, and know and believe they are a good person, when you marry them…
There's a reason the Bible frowns on promiscuity and adultery so much. It really isn't good. Despite postmodernists trying to change all that.
because its worth it if you find it. it may seem impossible and maybe it is but youll never no if you dont seek it out.
@@user-lt1jd1ye3v Not worth the risk at all. Countless men are betrayed after decades of marriage to women they thought were perfect. It's pure foolishness to trust unconditionally.
Jesus this hit hard.
Dad of 3, and JP has been amazing in my life.
Hes the voice young men need.
He hates men though, and advocates for slavery and expendability.
One of my rules to be happy: I really dont care what the other people think about me.
The best advise of the year
Amen
Crumb did the iconic "Keep on Truckin'" Meme... did it on LSD. He was in the middle of the San Fransisco Hippie scene but detested it.
I recall that meme. It was on T-shirts, and people said that from time to time. Mid-'70s, if I recall.
LOL. It made him
I remember that on many bumper stickers back in the 70's.
@@lonzo61 1968 Zap Comics
I visited Rip Off Press when I was in San Francisco 40 years ago. Crumb loved the hippie world of the 60’s, free love, Haight and Ashbury, and all the trappings of the hippie lifestyle. He detested it once the dark elements saw what was happening. Bikers, hoodlums, criminals, predators, They all moved in and took advantage of the openness and the naïveté this world had to offer. Strong men create good times.
Good times create weak men. Weak men create bad times. Bad times create strong men. Strong men create good times.
lift weights, no matter what your body type.
Facts
💯
That's what I did in my early 20's. Loved it. But when I got hurt I changed my course. I tried to come back in my 40's and it wasn't fun anymore. Still, if it gives you purpose, go with it. Like you said, regardless of your body type or age. But if you're old, you definitely have to limit how hard you push yourself. Unless you want a snapped tendon or something.
Martial arts changed my life
@penderyn8794That's a bad idea for 2 reasons. 1, before the advent of targeted training introduced by people like Eugene Sandow, muscular physiques were practically unheard of. Physical jobs don't provide the right type of stimulus to develop a lot of muscle, maybe a little. 2, most physical jobs involve moving in sub-optimal ways for extended periods of time. Most mechanics for example end up damaging their body by their 40s. Weight training lets you choose to only work out for, say, an hour, 3-4 days per week, whilst controlling your form. So basically, weight training results in larger gains and less physical damage/degradation.
If you get rejected by a girl don't let it stop you come back but remember what that girl did and treat them as such
I have my own house, make an above-average salary, volunteer for a high office position at a well-known children's hospital, work out all the time/am not overweight, and I 6'3". I still get rejected by women. And when I ask them what I could do to improve, they say nothing but they just don't see things working out. If I'm the problem, I'd love to fix it, but I'm finding it hard to believe I'm the problem.
How would you rate your face from 1-10?
@@kamarikucheza No idea
The fact that you asked women basically "how can I improve myself to be worthy of you" shows a severely low self confidence. Should you be open to constructive criticism being volunteerd from people who really know you? Sure. But asking approval and feedback from some woman you're dating and trying to convince her to like you? No way. If your profile pic is you, your looks are fine. Somehow, you are coming across as overly needy or creepy, but you're not seeing it. Go to coach Corey Wayne's channel and peruse his videos. He's got a free book too. He'll help you understand how you might be lowering a womans attraction. (Yes the dating pool is awful, but it's likely you are messing up the seduction process, like so many dudes.)
@@GUITARTIME2024Asking for improvement isn't being needy or creepy. And I don't have low self confidence. Listening to people like that who encourage frequent sex with random women does not make you less needy. In fact, it makes you more needy because you have lesser standards for the women you're with. I would recommend not listening to people like this.
@spiritsavage That's the saddest thing I've heard in a long time."Can you give me advice on how not to completely lose your attraction, my fair lady." (plus they often can't articulate what you're doing wrong, or you creep them out so they dont want to be honest. ) You also might want to be screened for autism.
Another video about me, wonderful! I feel seen, heard and special. 🤣
All attractiveness boils down to one thing: immune system. Once people assimilate this simple concept they will be able to avoid a lot of pain.
How can immune system status be deduced from a photo on a dating app?
Care to elaborate?
@@MobNuke You dont have to take my word for it. Do your research. Attractiveness is directly related with the capability of generating a healthy offspring, which totally makes sense by an evolutionary perspective. Thats why a person with a disability bound to a wheelchair for life doesnt really have the most desirable genes to pass along, and its not exactly what you would want to breed with.
@@MobNuke And the same can be said about lard beasts that just sits on their 4$$4s all day while pigging out on oreos, snickers bars and soda.
@@Pazuzu- I see what your saying, its not unheard of for a disabled person to have children though. How would a woman know if a guy's immune system is weak or not anyways?
I'm 36 yo male. I am generally considered good looking by women. I have kept steady, generally well-paying, employment my whole adult life and my net worth is good for my age. I've been told that I am a picture of health - physically anyway. I have good hobbies. I don't have great mental health though. It's hard for me to form close relationships, and I find it hard to engage in/maintain conversation with anyone, including family. Because of this, it's been over 10 years since I have had a girlfriend. I have never had sex or kissed a girl even (I am also a devout religious person). i don't really have friends. I grew up in a loveless household and have struggled with self-abasing thoughts my whole life (though they are getting to be less and less). Really hard to overcome social anxiety/awkwardness, despite efforts to do so. Sometimes, I do feel like a loser. Anyone else have this struggle?
The main thing you should do is ditch the religious stuff. All religion does is instill an "unworthy" mindset, which also is probably subconsciously keeping you single.
@cabey2082 I went through that struggle in my early 20's. You are lucky because you are still young (as a man), and have years ahead to learn from your mistakes. Women do not have that luxury, so they have a much more dangerous, perilous (foreshortened) journey.
The thumbnail has so many levels of irony to it i cant
Jordan Petersen has another fascinating guest on who must sit and listen to Petersen speak incessantly
Another arrogant cowardly anonymous derisive troll demon parading his self-assumed superiority.
LOL!
Without losers, there are no winners and so on. One can not be without the other. It's hell to be a loser, but someone has to do it.
The boy crisis= MATRIARCHY. A pleasure to read this book last summer, thanks a lot. You were close.
5:54 Absolutely. It’s such a cop out to dispose of marriage and family because of difficulty. Landing a good woman has always been the challenge of a man’s early life. You have to choose well, be in community and take the risk of living your life. Don’t be a coward and hide out in excuses.
Great clip, especially at the beginning with the "Crumb" commentary and then at the 9:00 mark with the analogy with the buck elk and their antler racks.
"Let's not fix humanity, society or our standards and grow as a species. The solution to your suffering is to play this more or less psychopathic game where we value humans not because their personality or huminity but by what they can offer each one of us and how we can benefit from others." In other words even a psychologist like Mr. Peterson thinks that we humans are only valuable as tools to benefit others. Until 4:50 I was like: "I have already drawn the conclusion that should be taken from this but let's see what Mr. Peterson thinks the logical conclusion is." His conclusion wasn't what I thought a psychologist would say. Edit: The problem isn't that you shouldn't be useful. It's perpetuating the idea which gold digger women also say. This is what I think is problem with humanity, we view everything as transactional. "Be useful, not used." This is why as a Christian, and Peterson is you see this I mean biblical way not the postmodernist intellectual way, a human's value in any relationship shouldn't be tired of being useful the way you said. I wonder if Paul, Silas, John, Peter etc were losers according to this. Jesus himself didn't have an actual job. He went around places and preached the kingdom of God. Same basically for Paul during his ministry, though Paul made tents. In other words, if you marry someone should they stick with you in sickness and in health or when you are the richest man alive? Does she love you if she's only there for money and what you provide? Is that type of woman worth even your attention? An example from 12 rules for life, was Tammy there when you took antidepressants? When Mikhaila was sick? When she herself was sick?
Ever heard of the term "Fair weather friend?" That's basically what I'm talking about. Apparently humanity hasn't changed in 2000 years.
He doesn't think that. He only thinks MEN are useful as tools. The same old misandrist drivel, men are human doings, women are human beings.
Is Jordans next video going to be addressing loser women? No of course not.
JP is a man. I expect him to know more about loser men than women. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..........
You should really consider dropping your derisive bitterness.
Guffaw you are on to something
@@JordanBPetersonhey Jordan .
@@JordanBPetersonWhy? If you're being wronged, shouldn't you resent it? Isn't giving up your resentment at being continually wronged just accepting being wronged forever without resistance?
I like when experts on the subject speak.
I'm sometimes surprised that I stop finding a woman attractive if I find her unusually selfish or some other very negative quality I hadn't expected. I suppose that might prove that the underlying reason I find some women attractive up until that point is for procreation reasons, even though that isn't foremost in my mind or even likely at my age and position in life. Although I consider myself a "loser" in one sense, the usual sense, I consider myself fortunate in other ways, such as being looked upon as a grandad by my friend's children, many now grown up, because they aren;t judging me by anything other than mywillingness to spend time playing their games that their parents aren't, or spend money on treats lol - so I feel a success in that sense. Having a few healthy hobbies helps also, even though I'm not particularly good at any of them, I enjoy passing on the bits I;ve learned about things like songwriting or whatever. I feel sorry for kids who get to about 20 and show no signs of ever escaping living at home and their hobbies being kinda UNhealthy obsessions I;d say, like video games where they will never be anything to show for their efforts. It's so hard to positively influence those people though when they've learned to measure success all the usual ways and feel sorry for themselves for their predicament, never seeming to think outside the box a bit. Or maybe I am misjudging them. Just thinking aloud.
Video games can be a great gateway to strategic thinking, creativity and further education like history or programming. Of course they can be overdone and many modern games are done by corporations that are just as exploitative as the gambling industry.
@@mysmartphonechannel I'll have to think about that then as I'm sure you're right and I can't pretend to know anything about video games other than having to keep buying the ridiculously expensive controllers and games and charge cables or mending the consoles which used to overheat - so they've always seemed like a gateway to parents wallets. I suppose it must depend on the individual and their life circumstances to some extent because come to think of it, I was forgetting about some of the people I have known who grew up to have very respectable, responsible jobs like teaching or social work, now married with children - In that case they had educated parents. I was probably over focussing on the few I know who don't have much else going on in their lives with a stressed single Mum who mainly wants them out of the way I guess. In that case I've failed to inspire them to take interest in a wider variety of things such as their bikes or learning to play chess, so I can at least join in. It was cute when they were little and showing me the Fortnite dances but got less cute when they became obsessed with the more, er, "aggressive" games shall we say, staying up all night and having some questionable interests and "career" paths - I'm having to speak in couched language. Picture Ali G and you won;t be far off, because that's almost how one lad I know has begun to talk and that culture seems attractive to them for some reason. It's hard for an oldie like me to relate to and I'm not sure to what extent video games played a part, if any. Hopefully it's just a phase but in this case, 21 seems a bit old for having no other interests so I worry for his 12 year old brother following a similar path so far. TBH, lockdown seemed to play a part as he went from a kid obsessed with doing speed maths, doing well at school, keen on football, to a very overweight kid always getting excluded from school after they returned. I can't imagine being about 8 and having life turned upside down that way, losing a relative and not being able to see anyone, mainly interacting with friends online. But I'm digressing so I'd better leave it there. I'll dwell on what you say a bit more.
@@mysmartphonechannelYour "strategic thinking" is worth nothing if the only thing you do is playing video games. Life is not a game.
The dilemma:
Have a woman but have no peace, always pressured to make her dreams come true and open yourself up for hurtfull failure,
Or,
Have no woman, diminish your productivity/needs and live a peacefull, organized life.
I’m gonna change up the second part of that dilemma. Don’t have a woman. No problem. Boost up your productivity and become the man you need to be for you and you only. You have been programmed to believe that this world revolves around a man making a woman happy and that’s just pure toxicity when it isn’t reciprocated. Too many men are committing mental and spiritual suicide by being in relationships that aren’t good for them just so they can come home to someone every night and not be alone and they still aren’t happy
I love how he said if she doesnt pay, does she cook for you? Im a high earning woman and I've never dated for looks because intellectual ability has always come first. I used to split dates but now with my childhood best friend / long term partner, I prefer to let him pay while I cook delicious food. I've invested years into building the skill and I got certified in nutrition 7 years ago so that I can eat healthier and make my family healthier
Good women will love a "loser", my boyfriend was short and lanky in school, and we were friends then too. He's been a straight shooter and I see a million times the potential in him than shallow insensitive men any day
I know its hard as a man
Wish you the best
The tough thing here is for those of us who simply can't find a woman worth marrying. It's extraordinarily slim pickings. So many are now out of the question, too much of a risk. Dating hasn't been an issue, dating a woman worth marrying has.
Same in the reverse. I find the same with men.
Thats your own negativity and pride, you aren’t too good for everyone else, despite your convincing yourself otherwise
Do you think culturally through the generations, women have become non marrying material partly due to feminism and mistaking being a good partner with being a servant?
That struck me as a surprising comment. I am still single at an old age. I won't mention the number. I tend to look back a lot and I regret blowing it with a few women that were precious and I regret a lot more staying on with mean, selfish manipulators that damaged me and drained me emotionally or financially. I have always looked at marriages and couples that would have conflicts in the open and wondered how that guy could have not foreseen what a mess life was going to become with this woman. You remind me that the best potential wives are few and the rest are not work risking one's future happiness on.
Agreed. the reward is not worth the sacrifice now. i was the man women wanted and always could find girls if I tried but it was just not worth it.
In response to 85% of female elks procreating with the buck with the biggest rack, interestingly, in my hometown, 85% of the males procreated with the woman with the biggest rack, and it only cost a buck. Total, I mean, not each.
😅
HAHAHA 😂
Wife says to husband ... we've got no cash , let me go out on the game and make some ... he agrees ...
7am she comes home ,, he's been awake all night worrying ... says to her ... are you ok? ... she replies yes no problems
He asks how much did you make ? ... she responds $1001
He replies 1001 !? .... who paid you $1 ?
She replies ... they all did
I went to an all boys school and I was a geeky dude that did not know how to even talk to girls. Studied hard, went to college, graduated then joined the USN and had a successful 20 year Navy career. Post Navy I have a great job a beautiful wife and 3 grown kids who are good people.
Who cares
I thought the other guy was Malcolm McDowell... until he started talking.
LOL
"Loser", I wonder if that is an official psychiatric diagnosis.
😐In all seriousness it is though. Usually avoidant, schizotypal or autism spectrum disorders. Which one i have?
I mean “bully” basically has those so why not loser? Probably more flavors of losers
Might as well be
@@monk3110Bullies are losers, too.
It’s being used as the common relatable phrase
There needs to be a deep discussion about the people who "don't have the ability, the want, the need to conform to the rules." There are many examples throughout history. I find it disgusting that social labeling is so easily done, it just shows the need that people need a scapegoat to make their egos feel better. To truly test if there are benefits to this kind of acceptance.