"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone." Robin Williams
@@axeell92 "I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone." Bobcat Goldthwait
The only time i have come across someone acting like that is only on the internet, i figured maybe its to portray some sort of intelligent figure that oh we are aware of the fact that we are more privileged than others. Honestly that is so bullcrap. Everybody knows that everybody is a bit selfish, they have the right to be selfish and talk about their feelings and problems. No need to act all high and mighty about it and avoid these things. Kind of a weird video, made me realise there are people who actually dont feel comfortable talking about their struggle during quarantine just because they are living a bit more securely. My dad works in a hospital, he is your average man he sometimes complain about the situation at work, sometimes my mom complains too. Fortunately im a bit self centred and productive, so my mind is busy most the time but if i was feeling frustrated i would talk about it with my friends . Is that not simple enough to understand
True. How could you help people that are struggling “in the low - mid scale” if somebody would always say there are people that struggle more so you don’t have right.
Well is it though? I believe that is not a definitive statement. Because for many people, social connections truely are the path towards their livelihood.
4 years being socially rejected, backstabbed, betrayed multiple times by fake friends who left me for more popular kids while having no friends at all in school, at this point *I don't care anymore.*
The destruction of familial/community constructs and the amplification of self-importance (a general increase in narcissism) are the two main issues at play. Past generations had a spouse and kids around for much of their lives. For thousands of years, ancient peoples remained around their families and tribes throughout their lives-an intimate sense of community was a part of the human experience all of the time for most people. Part of what makes the loneliness so difficult is that it is alien to us...humans evolved over millennia surrounded by other humans, many of whom they were related to. People also lived in close proximity to each other-think small villages where you could walk across “town” in a rather short time. People think they’re very important these days too. Multiple social media platforms where we can broadcast ourselves and receive freely flowing validation from peers and (the pejoratively named) followers make us experience a heightened sense of meaning in our lives. Not only do we feel we are inherently more valuable when people give us attention, we feel that we are more valuable to others as well. We don’t hesitate to tell people that they’re special and that they should get exactly what they want-we tell people they can be anything they want to be. We have all of our sorts of products to buy and all sorts of media to absorb, and we can build our own unique identities based on what we consume. We feel we deserve everything: to be loved, to be heard, to have it now, to have our way, to have the friends we want, to live the life we want to live, etc. Of course, no universal law dictates or imposes that people deserve anything. Thanks to Enlightenment philosophy imparted by Western ideology and adapted into world-changing doctrines such as the U.S Constitution and the Bill of Rights , Western society has come to a collective consensus that people (white males over the age of 40 back then but this has since become universal) have fundamental human rights. While this advance in human thought was invaluable and necessary, the extreme and excessive nature of Western civilization has unsurprisingly taken such notions too far. We feel entitled to everything. I’m not saying all of this is bad. In fact, I believe many of the advances that have been made in what we feel people deserve are just and noble. Above all, I believe people deserve liberty (funny how the most basic human right, one which countless people have sacrificed their lives to preserve, is the also the one people will most readily surrender). Still, if we build all of these constructs and ideals into the mental framework of people to deprive them of it, then we’re bound for disaster.
@@Amanda-qe5lj some people just have lots of indoor hobbies; video games, reading, netflix, learning an instrument or a language, etc. But those people often don't realise how much they go outdoors and how much they socialise on a daily basis. So they think their lives haven't changed, but that realisation might come later
@@Amanda-qe5lj Yes, they are just romanticizing this quarantine period from introvert's point of view, but the truth is that being introvert doesn't mean you always want to stay at home all the time, it means that being with our self and enjoying our own company whether its home or anywhere
“Solitude is fine but you need someone to tell that solitude is fine.” - I am telling you. It's fine. You will get through it. And if you are reading this, so will you. Sending you all a virtual hug 🙏🏽
@Crys you think you'll feel better if you did have someone but you won't. You already have everything you need within you to feel completely happy. It may sound contrite but its true I promise. Focus on yourself, figure out what is truly causing the void your feeling the need to fill. Are you living in alignment to your purpose? Have you done your inner work?
It’s more than that.. it’s a feeling of being misunderstood, Unvalued, undesired, uninterested and unloved.. the wrong crowd will make you feel these things
Truly, you always have company. God is always there with you, and whould never leave you. God is the only source of power. He whould never let you feel insignificant. You ignore Them, you feel powerless, and alone. You remember?.. In everything?.. Well... Then - You cant be subdued in reality.
I don't even expect anyone to really read this, especially you Nathaniel. I will only tell you the one thing that my grandmother told me before she passed. I jokingly asked her if she had figured out the secret of life in all of her years to which she replied "Yes, I have." She told me that the secret is LOVE. Love who you are and embrace it, love others, help them when you can and embrace them for who they are. Once you have done that, everything literally falls into place. That is what she left me with, and those are the wisest words that have led me to be happy and never feel alone. Even if I am all by myself. Love conquers all, even if it is not love for another human being. I wish you the best, and thank you for the honest content. I greatly enjoy your videos!
What is love? The people you trust who have the "best" intentions love you in the only way they know and it can drown you. It starts with self love and that can only happen with forgiveness. Forgive your parents, your country, ect. for only knowing what they know. Loneliness is managing Life beyond the understanding of the ones that love you and want you to be within their realm of consciousness.
Hmm no - that's a very extrovert way of looking at it. We also have music, and books, and nature, and art, and travel, and running - just to name a few things.
Angeline Williams i think in a really cool way, these are all connections too, in a way. connections with characters, artists and the earth. we commit to times “with” these people and places, and bond with them, and receive energy, guidance and hope from them. it’s just as beautiful for us introverts too ❤️
Your content truly never disappoints. The level of attention you put into your work, the transparency and authenticity you bring to your channel is truly like no other. I am so in awe of how disciplined you have been about mastering this craft of storytelling. I've been following your work from early on and nothing brings me more joy than seeing you grow into the most amazing human being over the past few years and finally seeing you get the recognition that you SO SO SO deserve. Please keep doing what you're doing. Words can't even explain how much of an impact you've had on my life with all the valuable, wholesome and unique content you put out. Thank you, truly.
I might be wrong, but seeing a fellow Indian ( thanks to your name), commenting deep opinions about such rare and precious channel like Nathan's, makes me happpy! Hey there!
Well the world is ending, people of this generation are getting obsessed with social media where they post their fake fancy lives, it's all hypocrisy, well all are alone deep down.
Nathaniel, doubt you’ll ever read this. But this is some of the most under rated content I’ve seen on the platform and a very special type of content. The bars been set high here, I love the video essays and vibe how you process everything. I know the Algorythm on UA-cam can suck at times, but please don’t stop making videos because we all appreciate the content you’re producing so damn much!! With love from Australia!
"Your morning routine is not a personality trait." Something we all need to hear in this productivity-obsessed world we have created. Thank you again for sharing your thoughts. We all have our shadows and complications. Sharing them makes us less alone in the world.
Okay my experience i was feeling like him last month and im proud to say i found the "cure " for my loniliness .as an only child raised by a single mother, and no bestfriends and no boyfriend i started feeling alone like theres nobody for me and it hurts its the most discomforting position to be in. Anyways i realised that my mom would call her sister when she is feeling of and shit and i would watch couples loving each other or see bestfriends goals around me which was making me extremely JEALOUS AND YEAH. So i tried to be my own therapist and get down to the core i evaluated everything from how im feeling and my actions and i litrally allowed myself to go under the pool of loneliness. For a week all i did was eat, sleep and go on my phone i was a potatoe basically, i finally started to gradually pick myself up by changing me behavour. I tried self care and self loving and i lol i decided to become my own friend i started getting to know myself and you know its sound silly but yeah i spoke to myself in the mirror and i decided that to get out of this loniness i need to to find true happines within myself . And yeah now im still recovering but i have been chaning some habits and improving myself and now im happy and free . And now im just gratiful for whoever checks up on me and for the people i have around me
I’m going through the exact same thing right now. Thanks for sharing, made me feel better reading that I’m not the only one. Sending good vibes from Australia :)
I have been there in the past, years ago. Unfortunately, "my week" became years. Glad to know you've made progress so fast. Props on that!! For me, I identified myself more as the person who have been by themself so long that is kinda of hard to stay balanced. To find a position between being alone and comfortable with that but at the same time connecting with people deeply. Anyway, focusing in ourselves is always good and I hope you keep up with your good work. Cheers!!
Made me happy to see this comment and others because I've been going through similar stuff. Recently been doing self improvement and just overall getting to a state of being completely comfortable with myself so I can be more present and comfortable with others. Good luck on your journeys.
The relieving thing I realize that I was never through this alone... I just know everyone is doing through this phase at some moments in their life. So, I guess I give myself chance to be my own therapist and do self-care just like you did.
"The feeling of loneliness always springs up in me almost as a consequence of feeling misunderstood or when I'm seeking a specific kind of connection that I cannot have, either physically or emotionally." I love this sentence, probably because I can relate to it so much. It's strange how learning about and understanding yourself somehow disconnects you from people. You seperate yourself from them, sometimes deliberately, sometimes unknowingly, because you become more and more aware of who you really are at your core and therefore what brings you real joy and what you truly value in life. It's like you're dismantling your old self, getting rid of all the clutter society and your personal environment imposed on you and made you become. But thus, now you are facing struggles others cannot relate to and mostly not understand and you start feeling misunderstood as a consequence. That's at least my case. Due to this, I turned to writing in all kind of forms, from journalling to poetry to starting to write a book, as an outlet for my mind and soul, to process all my thoughts and emotions and not let them be stuck in my head. Moreover, I'm a hopeless romantic type of guy which adds on top once more but that's another topic... Edit: Thank you guys so much for your kind words, I truly apprechiate them! :)
so true! I've been encountering this a lot since I started discovering and trying to understand who I truly am. Whenever I want to share with others something interesting and new for me, almost nobody can relate to it which makes me a little sad. Probably, the thing is I haven't found and had those right people yet I do require in my life. I just keep telling myself that I will find that connection I desire in the future, I just should keep going.
So true... Learning new things is beautiful, but sometimes sad as well if it disconnects you from people. And if you move away from the norm, it is even harder to build new meaningful relationships. I hope you will find people who understand you and the other way around! There is always someone out there:)
“We’ve taken the tools and techniques that were meant to give us more time and space in our lives for the important stuff, and ended up filling all of our time and space with those tools and techniques.” Wow... that couldn’t have hit me any harder...
“Often times I’m the one obstructing the human connections I so desire” That’s a tough pill to swallow when you’re the villain in your own story and most of your pain is self induced
When you said that you have moved and you thought a new place will solve your problems, I remembered one thing I heard from another youtuber, a woman. She said that we always think that by moving, we will fix everything, a new and clean slate...but we often forget we are carrying ourselves with it, and that alone can be a burden. We must accept ourselves and just remember that running away may be a great temporary solution, but if we really want to change ourselves and our lives, we have to accept who we are and confront with the issues that bother us, not run away from them.
"Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible." Carl Jung
“Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.” -Carl Jung As you pointed out in the video, Nathaniel, I think that at the heart of it all is our longing to be understood by another, to have a level of intimacy with another person and know that you are known fully. There are many barriers to this, not least of which is how we are physically separate beings with an interior self that we often don't reveal, fearing judgement, rejection, being hurt. It's kind of tragic that our basest instinct of self-preservation leads us to reject vulnerable intimacy, when it is precisely what we long for the most. Thankful for your verbalization of these things, Nathaniel! There is a measure of comfort in knowing that we are not alone in feeling loneliness haha Edit: After living life without ever being truly vulnerable with people, I've decided to give it a go this last year. It was incredibly difficult, but it was worth the effort! I was so afraid people would leave once they knew who I truly was, but was met instead with people who chose to stay by me. All that said, loneliness still comes here and there, but now I know that I am, in fact, not alone.
I suppose this quote might lend itself to the feeling of suspicion that your friends don’t truly accept every aspect of you, and that you simply can’t be a fully honest version of yourself around them. I’ve felt this most of my life now, with a handful of exceptions.
@@Floral_Green Same, although for me it's more like at every stage of my life I've become close with a certain type of people, with the realisation every time that no, this person too won't get it, maybe next time. And the aggregation of that self suppression makes it that much harder the next time.
Love these type of videos of yours, when you sit down and talk about things that aren’t easy to talk about. you’re being vulnerable and honest in front of such a large audience, that takes a lot of courage. And it’s a truly inspiring trait. Keep it up Nathaniel.
This is hitting me so hard. After several human interactions that left scars, I changed. I learned more and more how to stay content on my own, but not happy. I question my relationships and even fear abandonment because it’s all I have known. Would I ever admit this before this video? Absolutely not. Thank you for this.
Same 😢 even with him speaking about moving to Mexico he said this would be the first time he will be actullsy alone and its scary. I'm 34 living with parents. I battle with depression. But I want a since of something idk
I've felt so lonely my whole life that I don't even notice any difference between my life before quarantine and my current life. Absolutely nothing changed lol.
Same. I’ve been thinking about that a lot today. I literally have no one to hang out with once this is all over. Everything will just go back to how it was before.
I relate to this. I just wish I had more time to build stronger connections and make new friends at school but there wasn’t. Now when quarantine is over I won’t have anyone to hang out with, I’m not really sure what I’ll do.
I relate to this so much, but didn’t know how to put it into words at first. It seems like these comments have been able to explain how I am feeling better than I ever could, but makes me sad that I am not the only one who’s life hasn’t had that much of a difference from before quarantine to now.
Dice-Personal Growth Man’s Search for Meaning is, I think, among one of the best books ever written. People are highly adaptable and it almost makes me feel guilty for complaining about this quarantine when so many adapted and were able to survive during the holocaust. Today, I saw Gal Gadot’s instagram and it was a picture of her grandfather wearing his Auschwitz uniform. If that is not perspective, I don’t know what is.
I am currently reading MANS SEARCH FOR MEANING. I have had it in my collection for a long time but I could never get started. I followed my intuition and finally took this opportunity to begin. I am almost halfway through and it's really good. I really needed to see life through a different lens.
Guys, this is a truly biological and expected response to being isolated. As a social species, we are not meant to be alone. Our group is our safety, which is why you feel this way, introvert or not. Give yourself a little credit in knowing that your body and mind are reacting correctly. It's not a failure of yours perfectly but knowing that you actually are functioning quite well as a human being. However, this is an immediate response to a temporary situation. We won't be alone forever, this will pass.
I think it's a good reminder to get out there and make more friends for all the people who relied on work colleagues and their significant other only. Now is the time you could use someone to talk to. And not just anyone but someone who listens and understands you. I neglected it and now I regret it. And while it might be temporary it's little help while you are stuck in it.
I hope you're doing better now, I have been and kind of still am in the same position as you. I just let my emotions out sometimes by going to a place outside the city and just scream on the top of my lungs and then work out and it helps for me. You'll get through this!
I am an introvert, and I really loved staying home... until now... I am now craving the presence of strangers, the daily walk to the office, going to grocery stores and many more routine activities, (the stuff I took for granted before this pandemic). Everyday feels the same... And it's very frustrating.
Well, it's kind of the same for me. I don't even mean that I feel lonely. I guess I miss the sense that people around are me do express positive energy, that they can go about their daily life which has ups and downs in an uninterrupted way. I guess what others me is the fact that so many lfes has been turned into havoc. I do not feel lonely. Actually I'm pretty busy with remote work and some course which I attend and which, hopefully, I am about to finish and have exams from. But still this siutation is slowly taking a toll at my emotions too since I feel so many people around me scared, stressed, confused, internally conflicted, business people not knowing what will happen to their business the next day etc. Even my study group gets me this feeling so I'm trying to motivate them not to let their time to go to waste, to organize somehow, to make good , productive use of their time. And sometimes this is the only thing we can do under circumstances like these: support local business or people you admired/ liked as professionals before, motivate people you work or study with, if you still work do your work the best you can despite all the obstacles, learn something that can make your progress in life later on once things get back to normal. If you feel lonely try to interact with folks even online. After all you're not the only lonely person out there, and probably you're not the only introverted person out there having a strong emotional response to it all.
It's been hitting me hard, too. I've actually been exhausted no matter how much I sleep for the past several days. I have never experienced anything like this. It's just odd.
I'm responding to your comment from bed after just sleeping for 10 hours. Honestly, I could sleep for 10 more if I let myself. I'm sorry you're also feeling so exhausted but it's relieving, in a way, to know that it is happening to other people too. This will pass. Stay well :)
Honestly, I'm so relieved to know I'm not the only one feeling the way I am. I'm definitely feeling slightly sick myself but not in a real way. My stomach doesn't feel good, I've tried to get out but I just don't feel good enough to do so. I definitely could lay in bed and sleep the entire day, no issue. I just feel like I'm wasting so much time.
I was depressed for 5 years with medication. I was feeling like you for a long time. I was privileged as well. Then I started to create myself from the beginning. I started new healthy habits. Quitted toxic people. Started doing Calisthenics. Started eating healthier. I quitted smoking. Started reading more books. Started meditation. Now i play piano which makes me so happy! I lost all my friends and broke up with my girl i was dating for 8 years. I was alone. But That was a gift because i finally found the time to find the real me! A spiritual journey has lonely moments but loneliness is precious. Where there is silence you can hear everything. After all this work i did, I lost my father from cancer at 70 years old. I wasn't ready but I was. It's been 3 months since his loss but the bottom line is this: Self love. Most of the times it is enough. Staying alone and being happy with it its the soul's treasure. With Love from Greece, Jason! By the way check out my song Pain I composed for my father on my YT channel!
Hey! Thank you for writing this. I recently am going through the phase of loneliness myself...totally broken and shattered. I don't know what should I do and where should I start. Its just a mental war I am fighting with. But your story has just motivated me to take one step at a time and try to learn to understand myself.
Going to be honest with you... On a daily basis I search through UA-cam hoping to find videos I genuinely connect with. About 99% of the time the videos I come across are in my eyesight for no more than a minute. After finding your channel, I have watched 5 videos in their entirety in under a day of being subscribed. I think this is for a few reasons. I feel a lot of the topics you speak about hit close to home. I also think majority of the time we try to have these conversations with others who either a) don't want to confront it or b) "think it's too deep" - it's difficult. Through quarantine, I'm really trying to not look at all the things I'm missing out on, but rather realizing the absence of things that truly make me happy. Once we're through this, not taking those things for granted and doing them more. No matter how it's perceived.
Yeah there is a difference between staying in home with your own will and staying in home without your will. I rarely go outside. But now I wanna go out so much. I will go outside more once this quarantine ends all by myself.
Emma Bunch-Benson Everything is a social construct; this is a non-argument designed to shut down further discussion of a topic. But yes, introversion-extroversion is a nuanced spectrum, if we’re to accept its theory.
@@alfiemarie Don't simply focus on what you're doing and what you have to do to reach your goals, sometimes it's alright to take some time to just enjoy being- being is much different from doing because it's those times where we're just sitting down talking with someone we care about that truly make us happy.
“If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” - C.S. Lewis
Regarding this quote/narrative, I think the modern and especially western humanity are too much focused on satisfaction and think that this must be baseline in our lives, while the baseline should be based on regularly being busy with providing yourself a shelter and food like in the past. Life is not only happiness it is rollercoaster with ups and downs, so accept it. So if you aim only for ups you will even fall off your rollercoaster car as a period with adversity strikes in your life. People do not deal anymore with adversity or difficulties before entering a period of happiness, most people nowadays get without effort a dopamine shot in their brain
"We've taken the tools and the techniques that were meant to give us more time and space in our lives for the important stuff, and ended up filling all of our time and space with those tools and techniques." Dang, that's eye opening.
“Happiness is only real when shared.” I’d recommend watching the movie Into The Wild, or even just looking into the story of Chris McCandless to see just what kind of effect isolation and loneliness have on our emotions and opinions, whether it be forced, like the situation we’re in, or by choice, as Chris did when he decided he wanted to remove himself from society. The similarities between these two scenarios are super interesting!
I thought about the movie and this quote throughout the whole video, in the end we are all connected one way or another, and while individuality has it's importance, being open and connected to others also needs a part our lives, we shouldn't go to one extreme or the other, but have both, balanced Edit: Many individualists who worked on self improvement on their whole lives and had a near death experience, saw that they neglected people too much, that they closed themselves in their shell, and the near death experience made them see that clearly, and changed their priorities going forward.
I love this solitude to be honest. I've never been good at making friends, so when I finally gave up on that I gave up on a lot of stress. I think it's a matter of accepting that not much really matter in this world, including ourselves. That's what keeps me going.
I've been extremely lonely the past few days as well. I have never thought about needing help until now. Please send help. I wish I can give you some encouraging words. It's good that you've found the pleasure to reconnect with people which I haven't. I wonder why I can't just be alone and happy at the same time. It's impossible. Crying everyday is exhausting but I find relief in that. What a weird time. What a weird feeling.
Many are willing to talk to you but they are afraid that they'll be called as creep when they offer help online (comment section). I faced this problem before. I'm willing to talk to you btw.
hey, I'm also willing to talk or just share some of my favorite poetry or youtube videos. maybe we have some stuff in common or can spend a few seconds chatting
“The feeling of loneliness springs up in me as a consequence of feeling misunderstood” There was a moment once when a friend truly understood why I was crying without me having to say a word, she explained it out loud better than I think I even understood yet. I don’t think she knows just how much that meant to me, to feel truly understood. I also feel lonely when others don’t understand me or know me well enough, and I understand that is also on me to let them in and share more with them.
I’ve noticed that the more I focus on what I truly love doing, something I’m truly passionate about-the less lonely I feel. I get this feeling of fulfillment working every single day to get closer to my dreams. My passions is sharing personal finance tips on UA-cam and we’ve already gone up by 555 subscribers and it’s barely been a month🥳Follow your dreams Nathaniel🙏🏻
Man loneliness and isolation is so hard ... as a Syrian in Sweden I wish i have died in the war before coming to this level ... no social life, everyone has steryotype about me and more worse the weather and introvert people in this society ... feels like no place on the whole earth .......I will do my best t ochange my situation and then move to another place perhaps finding something new
This is one of the most beautiful videos I have seen. To stand up and embrace all the feelings. To try understand them rather them lock them in a box and hide them in a corner under some other inboxed feelings. Loneliness is a really scary, we have put so much fear in that word that we don't want to see it in the eye and say : hello, why have you come and how can I help you. We can say that easily to other people but not to ourselves. Thank you for reminding me 🙏 🌻
This was the first time I've heard, "Life isn't a sprint and it's not even a marathon. It's a relay race." So much gold I can relate to in this piece. Had to pause the vid so many times just so I can write down each word. (Side fun note: play video at 50% speed. Makes it sound like we're drunk having a deep convo over drinks with Nathan. 🤣😅)
As a person who takes so much pride in suppressing my feelings about loneliness, this is so relatable! I am starting to see the pattern again and it looks like an awakening mostly, an urge to fill up all the voids that was always there left unfilled. I am on a constant search for mental clarity too and honestly, I'm completely clueless where it would lead me. Sometimes what I fear is the amount of openness that I'm exposed to, while learning all about my emotions. Almost like it has the ability to make me and break me at the same time. All that's reliable is the hope that the future has to offer more. Anyway it's a search for us all. At least that's what I feel...
@@paramaduits558 I gotta admit it's the good old dumb idea of "what would others think if I openly say things", which is one of the few things that I'm working so hard to change. I'm making a difference at least to say it out here on this platform. And that sentence also implies how well Nathaniel does it. It takes a lot of courage to say the way he says those. :) :D I hope you understood!!
“If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.” Seneca I really like this quote, it provided me with some valuable insights into my life.
You breach topics many people are too embarrassed or scared to touch - loneliness, anxiety, happiness, etc - in a way that is both beautiful and comprehensible. Thank you for sharing your beautiful mind!
Loneliness has such a domino effect on so many things in your life. I’ve noticed that, as a straight-A student in high school, the difference between studying with friends at school and studying at home for such a long time is very noticeable. I’ve really let myself go.
It's exactly the same for me haha I found that working at the library allowed me to get school work done very quickly and efficiently, but at home I got distracted easily and can't focus as much as I want to 🤔
@@lucasc2152 I'm in high school at the moment, during my final year, and I have hit rock bottom since this began. I really hope that I can get through this. I don't even recognise myself anymore.
Damn this really, really hit me. I'm introverted as hell, but I still need to connect with people and be around them. It's been nice to recharge a bit, but I feel like at this point I've recharged enough to goto a party every night for at least a week straight haha. Thank you for this. Might be my favourite video of yours so far. Take care, Nathaniel. 🖤
I am an introvert and over the last years have quiet isolated myself. Wasn't really going anywhere, always doubted myself and had thoughts about me that simply are not right. Ironically now that everyone has to quiet isolate themself I start to get the feeling of wanting to go out and meet others and just miss this "regular public life" that basically has been shut down. I look forward to after all this go to the cinema alone, sit down in a cafe atleast once a month and just try to be more there. Sometimes opportunities are only visible when they're no longer there. Stay safe and healthy everyone and thanks Nathaniel for all of this 💙
You sound like you've been on the same journey I have: 'your morning routine isn't a personality trait'. I went through a period of obsessive self improvement, gorging on productivity content, honing my morning routine, meditating for hours. And it got to a point where I almost didn't want to meet up with my mates, as that would throw off my rhythm. But now, I don't worry quite so much about all that. I take the lessons I've learned, and I live a more active, meditative, productive life than I did before. But I also give myself space to hang out with my friends, chill with my gf, and, most importantly, do dumb, impulsive, fun shit sometimes. Without reading stoic philosophy daily, or meditating (unless I'm super stressed), I've found a balanced middle way. All this productivity content is great, but its not the end goal. The goal has to be to be happy, and to be connected to people you love.
It has been so scary to look inward and even start this journey. Adding to it, you rarely find people who understand and can talk to, as people get into religious aspects. Channels like yours have given me so much courage to start this journey of observing and trying to understand everything about mental health and my emotions and to make changes in my lifestyle that is actually making me feel better. I'm in the initial phase of making changes in my lifestyle and there is a lot to learn. But yeah, Thank you so much. Sending you light.
I am getting increasingly fed up with the words "rational" and "irrational". It implies the binary systems of "mind vs matter", "heart vs mind" etc. Our existence is *steeped* on emotion, rationality needs contact with the material in order to create any sort of framework and our thoughts are not separate from what we feel; our emotions themselves aren't messy, the mess comes from the conflict between what we feel and what we THINK we should feel (thanks, society! /s). Our so-called rationality is nothing but a human-made concept we invented to separate ourselves from any other creature and thus prove our "superiority" or something of the sort. We are so damn enamored with the idea of it as a society that we have been taught to ignore our emotional needs and now they are our ultimate weakness; we are so blinded by our own intellect's sense of self importance, we don't even realize how much we rely on our senses and our emotions. When we see the repercussions of our own intellect's emotional neglect we then we blame our "irrational" side for causing us this discomfort in the first place. The problem isn't our emotions. It is us ignoring and underestimating the importance of those emotions in favor of so-called "rationality". Pure intellect, complete objectivity doesn't exist! Stop trying to be "rational", because WE aren't! And that's not something to lament.
very well said! i am so fed up with people wanting to make me feel better or different or whatever. emotions are just emotions! you dont have to rate them, let them be and everything will fall into place just like its supposed to be. not that its easy. but its very simple....
I find that venturing into finding the "God-self" through spirituality has made me whole but has also strangely distanced me from others. Not on their part but there comes a great sense of peace but solitude when one faces and resolves their inner "demons" and starts to see the roles that are played on a daily basis. What truly belongs to someone and what doesn't. What is real vs what is taught to be. I found myself grieving the fact that many around me have not plunged into themselves or grieving old aspects of myself. With that I ask myself "should I just pretend to fit in?". The truth is that there is no going back but at the same time I respect that there are many levels to reach within finding the self. After staying at a level of peace and neutrality, I am ready to venture into joy and connecting with others once again. I find that I have to almost retrain myself to now completely feel others but at the same time remaining in my center to be able to bond and bring out change. It has been a challenging path but one that I have greatly appreciated because it has brought me closer to knowing who I am. I just wanted to share because I relate greatly to your content. Know that what you do by sharing your thoughts and point of view help break a big barrier and brings many together. You are a natural speaker and I deeply thank you for the authentic voice you put out there.
Totally feel you on this. At least we all know we are not alone. Keep up the great work and bringing honesty to UA-cam. You are a great model and inspiration for all of us small Tubers :)
@@karenmcgregor9956 Yes, and thank god for the internet. We are blessed to be able to stay so connected to one another through technology. I can't imagine how people felt with this 100 years ago during the Spanish Flu.
@@AllenDMedia What I'm going to offer is based on a conversation with an aunt who recounted her role in that desperate period and still marvelled many years later that she had nursed everyone in the family, but never been the least bit sick herself. The individuals who were sick were lying in bed at home being nursed. They survived and slowly recovered or they didn't quite oblivious of anyone else's suffering. There was no medical system or ER to which they could turn. Few called a doctor as they couldn't afford it. Those who were well got on with the back-breaking work of nursing others in environments (without electricity or the modern conveniences we enjoy today) and providing the sustenance required of those in their immediate circle. Anyone outside that loop was irrelevant. Many didn't have a radio. A newspaper delivered information several days, perhaps even weeks after the fact. You were in your own bubble whether it was fighting for your life, caring for those who were ill, and burying the dead.
The narratives are gold, perfect in every sense, and also one of the best outros out there that I've ever seen, it's mind blowingly heart-wrenching in good way a nostalgic feeling of memories in every shot.
Yes!! This is comfort and wisdom. God created us for fellowship with Him and when we have that we have the capacity to have purpose and the ability to be content with ourselves and the ability to love and fellowship with others.
Yes! God longs to have a relationship with us. When we do, the loneliness goes away. He'll always be there. He loves us and cares about us. The void we feel is for God to fill. We don't have to live in loneliness.
That invisible pain is nothing to this fused with constant pain. I was on a similar path, very similar, before being struck at a similar age not sure yours but just after turning 22. Essentially went from trekking in the Himalayas to bedridden for eight years, glorious interlude and now 20 years. Much as I empathize, imagine all this with that, as that is the reality for so many rare disease intractable pain patients and those with sudden disability overnight, but for life. Always enjoy your videos and perspective but do spare I thought for those less blessed. Wish you well brother.
I've been watching your videos for a couple of years now and I find the way your train of thoughts evolved fascinating. What is more fascinating is the way you share it with us in a concise manner. Through your videos, I can say that you and I are very similar in a lot of ways so when you talk about things that even I can't explain about myself, it makes me feel understood and less lonely. Keep doing what you're doing!
How tiring would it be that wasn't the case 😬 I make videos on careers, education, family and entertainment. If you have time would love it if you checked out my channel brother. Salams 🙂
That comment about the question " How are you feeling? / How are you?", I am from Slovakia and people never really ask you these questions as a first question when you meet somebody because it's actually quite personal questions to ask and it always gets me thinking deeper about the answer and then I realize that I don't know that person well so why would they even ask me that if they don't mean it? Basically, I think people should ask it if they actually mean to find out what's bothering you or general honest curiosity should be behind these questions. How are you feeling / how are you to me here in the UK is more like hello, people don't even expect you to answer the question cos they're in the hurry anyway. Glad you raised that point. And holly shit totally right about the vocabulary about these crazy times. I admire that you know what to focus on in order to find out where the problem is and why it's happening. Keep up the good reflection.
@@mariemmattoussi7469 Pretty much. I'm from Poland living in Canada now and I remember how I was weirded out by people when asked How I am and I started saying this and that and they looked at me like I'm dumb or from Mars. Bro... you fucking asked me a personal question and it was super rude when someone just said How are you and just passed me by. Shit like that don't happen in Poland and most European countries. People aren't as fake as in the west and yes, we just say Good Morning etc without this How are you with clown smile LOL and we ask friends how they are because we care and want to listen what they maybe did recently, just what's up with their lives or situations. With strangers we don't fuck around with how are yous. It's a pleasant Good Morning and straight to business.
kubasniak That’s not really rude, it’s a cultural difference. We also say “what’s up” in english to our friends to mean “hi” sometimes without actually literally meaning to ask what they’re up to, once again that’s not rude, it’s just a phrase in that’s developed a different meaning in our culture. Saying how are you with a smile is not fake, that’s just how you’re interpreting it. But where I live people do often care and are nice to strangers. You don’t get that in England, and I personally like it. I think it depends on what you’re used to.
@@mariemmattoussi7469 you say hello to only friends, family, and sometimes strangers. I guess the reason why we're a bit less open to having casual banter is because of the past. You know when we were occupied by Russians, there was a lot of things that weren't allowed. Like listening music from abroad and also if you had anything against communism you were chased and kicked out of the country. That's why it takes a wee while to gain people's trust.. But nowadays is a bit better I guess. I live in Scotland so I did change as well. Grateful that I become more open-minded. AS I always say it's still always down to the individual.
@@abcxyz4653 you're totally right, the past that plays a big role and also the culture. But at the end of the day, it's always down to the individual. I wouldn't say also that all the people who ask you how are you are fake, cos I have a lot of friends here in Scotland who do care so much more than my friends back home. Maybe the media is showing the main-stream shitty tv program that exists just to numb people's brains and it doesn't really give us some valuable experience. And then it seems like every how are you is fake. It's not. But I get that from time to time when it happened it made me feel very uncomfortable cos I could tell it wasn't asked with care. But hey ho nobody is perfect and people learn to be better every day :). I appreciate any comments and love rambling
Hey Nathaniel, your thought process is profound. It’s curious and digs deep. I’ve always appreciated your work. It’s a difficult time, we’ve been put in situations where our old belief systems have been challenged. It’s a mess, however that may fit with someone’s situation. I’ve experienced loneliness in this time and it makes me wish I had a pet. We will get through this. Thank you
I applaud you so much for being vulnerable with your subscribers and showing that you are going through something many of us are. On UA-cam and social media in general, so many people seem to live happy lives, even during this pandemic. That is incredible hard seeing all the time when you are a lonely person. You are incredible!
In these times focus on good food, sleeping habits & working out. And if something is outside of your control try and shift your attention, there is nothing you can do. Be proactive, strengthening the immune system is the best action you can take. Stay safe yall 🍀🌎
When I was living in mom's house and the rest of my family I felt like I needed my own space. Then, I finished college I got finally my own place and yes. I started feeling lonely, because I needed someone I can talk to. When I met girl who wanted to spend lots of time with me , I felt like I had to give up from my personal space, it was like and invasion into something I built and took me time to have. So, I learned that I really enjoyed spending time with family and friends, but also I know that those times of being lonely will come and probably they'll wake some tough times. I learned to enjoy solitude because it's something personal and unique for you. Also, I definitely enjoy the company of a good friend and my mom. I celebrate each moment. Life is not a race, it's a journey. Hello from Cozumel.
That's an adjustment that I also needed to make. I love solitude, but I also love living with my girlfriend. It's just the balance. Sometimes when I need my space I just talk to her about it or go outside on my own for a few hours. The best part is that the same goes with her. Best of luck from Bulgaria! :)
"Man is, at one and the same time, a solitary being and a social being." You can be introvert, ambivert, or extrovert, but with time and age, or during the time of probe (now?) you will start seeing your inner needs whom you haven't allowed to speak before. The truth is, that on the way of improving ourselves and thriving for being better and better, wanting perfection, we start wearing the coat of egoism and tend to forget about the world around us. We are connected but also disconnected at the same time. Yet once we lose things we were taking for granted - let it be people around us, the life of the city, simple interactions, or freedom, we realise we miss something... We are all dependant on people, on being part of society. We all need these normal human feelings - fear, loneliness, happiness, feeling of belonging, love... These feelings make us human after all... And if you discover new feelings and allow them to speak, you will learn something about yourself. Some life lessons come with age, some with experiences, some by chance, or during such an uncertain time. How you will use it? You have the choice. Wish you all the best!
Man, I've been watching your videos for some time and must say, with every video you are getting better and better in presenting your message to the audience. The music, the clips you put in the video, everything... And now this one arrived and I'm speechless after watching (not counting this message I really had to wrote). And the ending... incredible, powerful. Thank you.
I love your honesty and approach to this sensitive topic. Feeling lonely is something we can all relate to - especially now. I've been asking myself the same question over and over again: Have I been chasing the right things - and is that even possible? I believe that all things in life happen for a reason and maybe now is the time to rethink the way we have been living our lives. Thank you for your videos, they are incredibly inspirational and valuable.
For me personally, when I felt the most lonely in my spiritual journey was when I couldn’t find someone that felt/thought similar to me. I had all of this newfound knowledge of myself and about the human experience in general but no one to share it with because they wouldn’t understand. That’s the thing about loneliness, it’s a craving to feel understood and validated. To connect deeply with someone that just “gets it.” And it’s ok! It’s a natural part of the human experience. The thing is tho, the only person that truly needs to accept, understand, and validate our thoughts and feelings is ourself. Which is DAMN HARD lol but it is so, so rewarding when you can finally accept all aspects of yourself, the good and the bad. You start to know and love yourself on such a deep level that you no longer care if you are misunderstood. And naturally, you are able to connect authentically and be more vulnerable with others. Sending love and light to all, please know that you are never alone in the way you feel ❤️❤️
“How is your heart?” Is my opener of choice when catching up periodically with people. It takes a minute to answer, and almost demands introspection. Not that I have a heads up, but I’ve been away from “home” (NYC) for almost 5yrs to write and parent alone basically in the jungle. I live in a part of a country that isn’t really interested in diversity, so it’s been probably more solitude than I originally bargained for.....but there’s a flow that eventually happens too in the quiet and space.... and it’s glorious.
Mario I never saw that movie....but now I most certainly will. It’s just a habit I developed when I really started deepening my meditation practice. How I speak to myself. Plus I absolutely hate small talk. Either it makes folks dive deeper into themselves, or retreat. And I’m here for it.
Emma Bunch-Benson Sometimes it automatically offers a safe space for people to real with their answers. “Oh, I’m good” or “Fine” doesn’t suffice. Try it out and see how it works. Ask yourself the same regularly.
I resonate to this 100% Thank you for your honesty and transparency. I just found you and your content today. You've inspired me, made me think, and helped me in my situation not to feel alone. I appreciate you sharing and your ability to flawlessly communicate your inner feelings. Im looking forward to diving deeper into the beautiful art you've created on this channel. Hoping soon you will find a long term solution and relief from this lonely feeling.
I am 44 and I only felt lonely when I was around people, near ones or others . I even never owned a TV, I felt accompanied... I do watch UA-cam now, because I have a choice what I wish to see/hear. Happy to come across You Nathaniel. What you say now, I had a lot similar thoughts before you were born. I feel very connected, you sound very familiar. Sending Blessings, in abundance! 💙
I feel like this crisis is teaching us how precious the small things are that we often overlook, like being able to see friends and family regularly. I really hope we learn something from this...
This probably sounds really weird but when I feel lonely the only way for me to describe it is I feel like I’m suffocating. Physically I can breathe fine but idk it’s weird and horrible feeling.
I feel the opposite. Now that all my neighbours are staying at home and being noisy through the floors and walls I would love nothing more than getting my solitude back.
Literally your video looks like you took my brain and thoughts out of my brain. I think the same way how this whole thing happening around us made some of us connect so much deeper within ourselves... I feel proud of you to share everything over here and make people realize we are not the only ones thinking this way.... Big thank you!
I’ve definitely been dealing with this too! I have weekly zoom “dates” with my friends and that honestly helps ALOT! You could maybe set something like that up to connect with subscribers it’ll make you feel less alone during this crazy time 😌
I've been 'self isolating' for a year now while studying and just as I've finished, everyone is self isolating and the whole world is in lockdown... This timing is just depressing.
The Lemon Eater maybe a reminder to not put off life for after school or this or that.. it’s tough, I’ve definitely done the same thing repeatedly over my life so far. It’s hard when school or work takes over such a large amount of our time and focus, I wish it could be more balanced.
Wow - I wondered if I am ok but finally I see I am not the only one and being resentful towards others when misunderstood is not just me. Thanks man - this is the first video of yours I've seen. I am on the other side of the planet from my family. And you helped me today with describing that loneliness. Like that, I feel a bit less lonely and a bit more understood. Thanks Nathaniel! Lucy
Its 3am, coming across your videos just now and immediately subscribed. First things first, your narcissistic abuse video brought me to your channel, I've have watched almost every video. What's going on right now is difficult, we are in our heads most days, it can be killer. Hang in there and stay focused!
“Loneliness doesn’t just go away when you spend time with other people”
"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."
Robin Williams
@@axeell92
"I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel alone."
Bobcat Goldthwait
When your alone you realise we are all-one
Alex Sabo I love robin williams!
Yesterday I thought about exactly the same topic. Thanks Daniel for the great Video
Just because someone has it harder than you does not automatically discount your struggles
Absolutely. We all have our on struggles, no matter big or small, they make us who we are.
The only time i have come across someone acting like that is only on the internet, i figured maybe its to portray some sort of intelligent figure that oh we are aware of the fact that we are more privileged than others. Honestly that is so bullcrap. Everybody knows that everybody is a bit selfish, they have the right to be selfish and talk about their feelings and problems. No need to act all high and mighty about it and avoid these things. Kind of a weird video, made me realise there are people who actually dont feel comfortable talking about their struggle during quarantine just because they are living a bit more securely. My dad works in a hospital, he is your average man he sometimes complain about the situation at work, sometimes my mom complains too. Fortunately im a bit self centred and productive, so my mind is busy most the time but if i was feeling frustrated i would talk about it with my friends . Is that not simple enough to understand
in the eyes of life and the universe, it does ... stop letting in to the softness, stop the pussification of human beings
Why is that?
True. How could you help people that are struggling “in the low - mid scale” if somebody would always say there are people that struggle more so you don’t have right.
Being alone for a while is dangerous. It’s addicting. Once you see how peaceful it is, you don’t want to deal with people anymore.” - Tom hardy
Wow your channel name and channel
Well, Hardy was right.
Well is it though? I believe that is not a definitive statement. Because for many people, social connections truely are the path towards their livelihood.
4 years being socially rejected, backstabbed, betrayed multiple times by fake friends who left me for more popular kids while having no friends at all in school, at this point *I don't care anymore.*
Yup, im 43 and have started to lose all “tolerance” towards my fellow human beings
Loneliness is the "pandemic" of this generation that we should be talking more about.
There should be an app where you can hangout with people with the same interest
@Belltown Daisy everywhere same, we think only our city but same story everywhere unless in villages
The destruction of familial/community constructs and the amplification of self-importance (a general increase in narcissism) are the two main issues at play.
Past generations had a spouse and kids around for much of their lives. For thousands of years, ancient peoples remained around their families and tribes throughout their lives-an intimate sense of community was a part of the human experience all of the time for most people. Part of what makes the loneliness so difficult is that it is alien to us...humans evolved over millennia surrounded by other humans, many of whom they were related to. People also lived in close proximity to each other-think small villages where you could walk across “town” in a rather short time.
People think they’re very important these days too. Multiple social media platforms where we can broadcast ourselves and receive freely flowing validation from peers and (the pejoratively named) followers make us experience a heightened sense of meaning in our lives. Not only do we feel we are inherently more valuable when people give us attention, we feel that we are more valuable to others as well.
We don’t hesitate to tell people that they’re special and that they should get exactly what they want-we tell people they can be anything they want to be.
We have all of our sorts of products to buy and all sorts of media to absorb, and we can build our own unique identities based on what we consume.
We feel we deserve everything: to be loved, to be heard, to have it now, to have our way, to have the friends we want, to live the life we want to live, etc.
Of course, no universal law dictates or imposes that people deserve anything. Thanks to Enlightenment philosophy imparted by Western ideology and adapted into world-changing doctrines such as the U.S Constitution and the Bill of Rights , Western society has come to a collective consensus that people (white males over the age of 40 back then but this has since become universal) have fundamental human rights. While this advance in human thought was invaluable and necessary, the extreme and excessive nature of Western civilization has unsurprisingly taken such notions too far. We feel entitled to everything.
I’m not saying all of this is bad. In fact, I believe many of the advances that have been made in what we feel people deserve are just and noble. Above all, I believe people deserve liberty (funny how the most basic human right, one which countless people have sacrificed their lives to preserve, is the also the one people will most readily surrender).
Still, if we build all of these constructs and ideals into the mental framework of people to deprive them of it, then we’re bound for disaster.
@@loveuandrew897 yeh.. People will call them "friendly tinder" Or "friendzoned tinder" 😂
@@darklightprojector2688 you nailed it. Social media has made everyone fall in love with themselves... too much.
To all the youtubers I loved before:
"Your morning routine isn't your personality trait"
I think it actually is at this point
thats deep
it's not a personality trait but it shows some of your personality.
It's a different feeling of staying home even for introverts...
yes, l see so many people saying their lives haven't changed a bit, and it's quite horrifying just to think living like that for a long time
tru
It gets to a point where there's too much understimulation :/
@@Amanda-qe5lj some people just have lots of indoor hobbies; video games, reading, netflix, learning an instrument or a language, etc. But those people often don't realise how much they go outdoors and how much they socialise on a daily basis. So they think their lives haven't changed, but that realisation might come later
@@Amanda-qe5lj Yes, they are just romanticizing this quarantine period from introvert's point of view, but the truth is that being introvert doesn't mean you always want to stay at home all the time, it means that being with our self and enjoying our own company whether its home or anywhere
“Solitude is fine but you need someone to tell that solitude is fine.” - I am telling you. It's fine. You will get through it. And if you are reading this, so will you. Sending you all a virtual hug 🙏🏽
Igor Marley Basic 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
Crys share it here. I will give you the support. Even virtually. Don’t forget, people care 🙏🏽
@Crys you think you'll feel better if you did have someone but you won't. You already have everything you need within you to feel completely happy. It may sound contrite but its true I promise. Focus on yourself, figure out what is truly causing the void your feeling the need to fill. Are you living in alignment to your purpose? Have you done your inner work?
I agree very much, i value my solitude alote, maybe even too much.
Mrsirgentleman that’s great. Me too. There is no too much. If it feels good, it’s good for you
“Your morning routine is not a personality trait”
This shit hits harder every time.
Jahir Lumagan, now those are wise words.
This.
Yeah, that resonated more than I like to admit. I actually stopped the video then to write it down as a reminder.
I didnt really understand this quote. Whats it about?
Being around the wrong crowd amplifies my loneliness and feels much worse than simply being alone. Maybe it is about feeling misunderstood
oh my god yes
completely agree!
It’s more than that.. it’s a feeling of being misunderstood, Unvalued, undesired, uninterested and unloved.. the wrong crowd will make you feel these things
This. I feel the most lonely when I'm around people and realize there is no chance there will be any meaningful connection.
Truly, you always have company.
God is always there with you, and whould never leave you.
God is the only source of power.
He whould never let you feel insignificant.
You ignore Them, you feel powerless, and alone. You remember?.. In everything?.. Well... Then - You cant be subdued in reality.
I don't even expect anyone to really read this, especially you Nathaniel. I will only tell you the one thing that my grandmother told me before she passed. I jokingly asked her if she had figured out the secret of life in all of her years to which she replied "Yes, I have." She told me that the secret is LOVE. Love who you are and embrace it, love others, help them when you can and embrace them for who they are. Once you have done that, everything literally falls into place. That is what she left me with, and those are the wisest words that have led me to be happy and never feel alone. Even if I am all by myself. Love conquers all, even if it is not love for another human being. I wish you the best, and thank you for the honest content. I greatly enjoy your videos!
applause!! thx for sharing
Dustin Schultz thank you for sharing
That's beautiful!
What is love? The people you trust who have the "best" intentions love you in the only way they know and it can drown you. It starts with self love and that can only happen with forgiveness. Forgive your parents, your country, ect. for only knowing what they know. Loneliness is managing Life beyond the understanding of the ones that love you and want you to be within their realm of consciousness.
I completely agree with you ❤
"The world isn't ending, but the rate at which things can end, has been evermore visible to me."
Damn.
Terrence Gunther i played back that part back like 6 times. i took so many things for granted. honestly, damn.
“In this terrifying world, all we have are the connections we make.” - bojack horseman
I don't and I'm still doing good.
@@seeyouagain911 but for how long
Hmm no - that's a very extrovert way of looking at it. We also have music, and books, and nature, and art, and travel, and running - just to name a few things.
Angeline Williams i think in a really cool way, these are all connections too, in a way. connections with characters, artists and the earth. we commit to times “with” these people and places, and bond with them, and receive energy, guidance and hope from them. it’s just as beautiful for us introverts too ❤️
Connect with your superior self. Really build that relationship
Your content truly never disappoints. The level of attention you put into your work, the transparency and authenticity you bring to your channel is truly like no other. I am so in awe of how disciplined you have been about mastering this craft of storytelling. I've been following your work from early on and nothing brings me more joy than seeing you grow into the most amazing human being over the past few years and finally seeing you get the recognition that you SO SO SO deserve. Please keep doing what you're doing. Words can't even explain how much of an impact you've had on my life with all the valuable, wholesome and unique content you put out. Thank you, truly.
I'm not good at putting my thoughts into words but you named perfectly what I think about Nathanel work so I just have to totally agree.
@@rat-in-the-void I second you!
I third you guys! :) @ShineOn
I might be wrong, but seeing a fellow Indian ( thanks to your name), commenting deep opinions about such rare and precious channel like Nathan's, makes me happpy! Hey there!
You really articulated everything I feel about him here. Forever grateful for your content, Nathaniel. Thank you!
“The world isn’t ending, but the speed at which certain things can end has never been more visible to me”
Well the world is ending, people of this generation are getting obsessed with social media where they post their fake fancy lives, it's all hypocrisy, well all are alone deep down.
Why is this so true @zach
Nathaniel, doubt you’ll ever read this. But this is some of the most under rated content I’ve seen on the platform and a very special type of content. The bars been set high here, I love the video essays and vibe how you process everything. I know the Algorythm on UA-cam can suck at times, but please don’t stop making videos because we all appreciate the content you’re producing so damn much!! With love from Australia!
+1 :)
Agreed
Yes!!
I whole heartedly agree!
From a fellow Australian viewer.
+1
It made my day. :)
"Found myself spending time with less people...but the right people." FELT THAT.
Andre Lagdameo THIS.
Can't find the right people without meeting more people though..
As introverts, we start to feel lonely because this time, it's forced.
The holystic vagabond
I mean I’m doing pretty good still, but ya it is forced....
Still lovin it tho!
Oh man 100%
Exactlly broo....
It's a new muscle we didn't know we had. Learning how to use it in our new way of life now. Sigh. Great insight. Be well 🕊️
Yes omg 👏🏾👏🏾
"Your morning routine is not a personality trait."
Something we all need to hear in this productivity-obsessed world we have created. Thank you again for sharing your thoughts. We all have our shadows and complications. Sharing them makes us less alone in the world.
NIkki Nadeau 🙏🏼
ps: I was someone who needed to hear this
Okay my experience i was feeling like him last month and im proud to say i found the "cure " for my loniliness .as an only child raised by a single mother, and no bestfriends and no boyfriend i started feeling alone like theres nobody for me and it hurts its the most discomforting position to be in. Anyways i realised that my mom would call her sister when she is feeling of and shit and i would watch couples loving each other or see bestfriends goals around me which was making me extremely JEALOUS AND YEAH.
So i tried to be my own therapist and get down to the core i evaluated everything from how im feeling and my actions and i litrally allowed myself to go under the pool of loneliness. For a week all i did was eat, sleep and go on my phone i was a potatoe basically, i finally started to gradually pick myself up by changing me behavour. I tried self care and self loving and i lol i decided to become my own friend i started getting to know myself and you know its sound silly but yeah i spoke to myself in the mirror and i decided that to get out of this loniness i need to to find true happines within myself . And yeah now im still recovering but i have been chaning some habits and improving myself and now im happy and free . And now im just gratiful for whoever checks up on me and for the people i have around me
I’m going through the exact same thing right now. Thanks for sharing, made me feel better reading that I’m not the only one. Sending good vibes from Australia :)
I have been there in the past, years ago.
Unfortunately, "my week" became years. Glad to know you've made progress so fast. Props on that!!
For me, I identified myself more as the person who have been by themself so long that is kinda of hard to stay balanced. To find a position between being alone and comfortable with that but at the same time connecting with people deeply.
Anyway, focusing in ourselves is always good and I hope you keep up with your good work.
Cheers!!
Made me happy to see this comment and others because I've been going through similar stuff. Recently been doing self improvement and just overall getting to a state of being completely comfortable with myself so I can be more present and comfortable with others. Good luck on your journeys.
The relieving thing I realize that I was never through this alone... I just know everyone is doing through this phase at some moments in their life. So, I guess I give myself chance to be my own therapist and do self-care just like you did.
Thank you for putting me into positive perspective... I hope you are doing well and stay safe
This guy's videos are a level of beauty all on its own.
"The feeling of loneliness always springs up in me almost as a consequence of feeling misunderstood or when I'm seeking a specific kind of connection that I cannot have, either physically or emotionally."
I love this sentence, probably because I can relate to it so much. It's strange how learning about and understanding yourself somehow disconnects you from people. You seperate yourself from them, sometimes deliberately, sometimes unknowingly, because you become more and more aware of who you really are at your core and therefore what brings you real joy and what you truly value in life. It's like you're dismantling your old self, getting rid of all the clutter society and your personal environment imposed on you and made you become. But thus, now you are facing struggles others cannot relate to and mostly not understand and you start feeling misunderstood as a consequence. That's at least my case. Due to this, I turned to writing in all kind of forms, from journalling to poetry to starting to write a book, as an outlet for my mind and soul, to process all my thoughts and emotions and not let them be stuck in my head. Moreover, I'm a hopeless romantic type of guy which adds on top once more but that's another topic...
Edit: Thank you guys so much for your kind words, I truly apprechiate them! :)
Wow bang on! Very nicely put!
so true! I've been encountering this a lot since I started discovering and trying to understand who I truly am. Whenever I want to share with others something interesting and new for me, almost nobody can relate to it which makes me a little sad. Probably, the thing is I haven't found and had those right people yet I do require in my life. I just keep telling myself that I will find that connection I desire in the future, I just should keep going.
So true... Learning new things is beautiful, but sometimes sad as well if it disconnects you from people.
And if you move away from the norm, it is even harder to build new meaningful relationships.
I hope you will find people who understand you and the other way around! There is always someone out there:)
Julian Schmidbauer A creative outlet eases feelings of isolation and loneliness. Keep writing. You’re good at it
Thanks for the words dude! There's definetely a big difference between loneliness and solitude.
“We’ve taken the tools and techniques that were meant to give us more time and space in our lives for the important stuff, and ended up filling all of our time and space with those tools and techniques.” Wow... that couldn’t have hit me any harder...
How he effortlessly put into words what I have struggled to express for so long
“Often times I’m the one obstructing the human connections I so desire”
That’s a tough pill to swallow when you’re the villain in your own story and most of your pain is self induced
So true. But the good thing is that we can be the hero/protagonist in our own story, too.
When you said that you have moved and you thought a new place will solve your problems, I remembered one thing I heard from another youtuber, a woman. She said that we always think that by moving, we will fix everything, a new and clean slate...but we often forget we are carrying ourselves with it, and that alone can be a burden. We must accept ourselves and just remember that running away may be a great temporary solution, but if we really want to change ourselves and our lives, we have to accept who we are and confront with the issues that bother us, not run away from them.
"Loneliness does not come from having no people around, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible." Carl Jung
“Loneliness does not come from having no people about one, but from being unable to communicate the things that seem important to oneself, or from holding certain views which others find inadmissible.” -Carl Jung
As you pointed out in the video, Nathaniel, I think that at the heart of it all is our longing to be understood by another, to have a level of intimacy with another person and know that you are known fully. There are many barriers to this, not least of which is how we are physically separate beings with an interior self that we often don't reveal, fearing judgement, rejection, being hurt. It's kind of tragic that our basest instinct of self-preservation leads us to reject vulnerable intimacy, when it is precisely what we long for the most.
Thankful for your verbalization of these things, Nathaniel! There is a measure of comfort in knowing that we are not alone in feeling loneliness haha
Edit: After living life without ever being truly vulnerable with people, I've decided to give it a go this last year. It was incredibly difficult, but it was worth the effort! I was so afraid people would leave once they knew who I truly was, but was met instead with people who chose to stay by me. All that said, loneliness still comes here and there, but now I know that I am, in fact, not alone.
Man, that quote hits hard.
I suppose this quote might lend itself to the feeling of suspicion that your friends don’t truly accept every aspect of you, and that you simply can’t be a fully honest version of yourself around them. I’ve felt this most of my life now, with a handful of exceptions.
@@Floral_Green Same, although for me it's more like at every stage of my life I've become close with a certain type of people, with the realisation every time that no, this person too won't get it, maybe next time.
And the aggregation of that self suppression makes it that much harder the next time.
Vaidik Khandelwal precisely why therapy can be such an invaluable experience - vital - in rewiring your brain and expectations
lemuel sap, this was helpful. Especially interpreting with Jung’s perspective.
Love these type of videos of yours, when you sit down and talk about things that aren’t easy to talk about. you’re being vulnerable and honest in front of such a large audience, that takes a lot of courage. And it’s a truly inspiring trait. Keep it up Nathaniel.
Thank you, that means a lot. :)
"There is a difference between being alone and being lonely"
This is hitting me so hard. After several human interactions that left scars, I changed. I learned more and more how to stay content on my own, but not happy. I question my relationships and even fear abandonment because it’s all I have known. Would I ever admit this before this video? Absolutely not. Thank you for this.
Same 😢 even with him speaking about moving to Mexico he said this would be the first time he will be actullsy alone and its scary. I'm 34 living with parents. I battle with depression. But I want a since of something idk
Jar-B Nice Have you always had it like this? Or is it something that occurred past 30. Loneliness, depression.
I feel you.
This comment section is really deep.
I've felt so lonely my whole life that I don't even notice any difference between my life before quarantine and my current life. Absolutely nothing changed lol.
Same here
@nemesisgenius Why arent you in a relationship?
Same. I’ve been thinking about that a lot today. I literally have no one to hang out with once this is all over. Everything will just go back to how it was before.
I relate to this. I just wish I had more time to build stronger connections and make new friends at school but there wasn’t. Now when quarantine is over I won’t have anyone to hang out with, I’m not really sure what I’ll do.
I relate to this so much, but didn’t know how to put it into words at first. It seems like these comments have been able to explain how I am feeling better than I ever could, but makes me sad that I am not the only one who’s life hasn’t had that much of a difference from before quarantine to now.
"When we are no longer able to change the situation we are challenged
to change ourselves"- Viktor Frankl
@@emmabunch-benson7922 I loved it too! Truly inspirational!
Dice-Personal Growth Man’s Search for Meaning is, I think, among one of the best books ever written. People are highly adaptable and it almost makes me feel guilty for complaining about this quarantine when so many adapted and were able to survive during the holocaust. Today, I saw Gal Gadot’s instagram and it was a picture of her grandfather wearing his Auschwitz uniform. If that is not perspective, I don’t know what is.
@@lilianmcleod7099 I highly agree, sure a time for us to develop into the best versions of ourselves.
I am currently reading MANS SEARCH FOR MEANING. I have had it in my collection for a long time but I could never get started. I followed my intuition and finally took this opportunity to begin. I am almost halfway through and it's really good. I really needed to see life through a different lens.
You’re lucky to have a friend who’s more than happy to listen to you talk about an unopened pack of olives.
😅
Guys, this is a truly biological and expected response to being isolated. As a social species, we are not meant to be alone. Our group is our safety, which is why you feel this way, introvert or not. Give yourself a little credit in knowing that your body and mind are reacting correctly. It's not a failure of yours perfectly but knowing that you actually are functioning quite well as a human being. However, this is an immediate response to a temporary situation. We won't be alone forever, this will pass.
I think it's a good reminder to get out there and make more friends for all the people who relied on work colleagues and their significant other only. Now is the time you could use someone to talk to. And not just anyone but someone who listens and understands you. I neglected it and now I regret it. And while it might be temporary it's little help while you are stuck in it.
That's how I feel, not only in the quarentine, everyday
Gabriel, me too!!!
I used to feel the same way bro.
Me too
me too ... :(
I hope you're doing better now, I have been and kind of still am in the same position as you. I just let my emotions out sometimes by going to a place outside the city and just scream on the top of my lungs and then work out and it helps for me. You'll get through this!
I am an introvert, and I really loved staying home... until now... I am now craving the presence of strangers, the daily walk to the office, going to grocery stores and many more routine activities, (the stuff I took for granted before this pandemic).
Everyday feels the same... And it's very frustrating.
Elesis Fernandez damn I feel that, I miss school and I really don’t even like it, I just want one more day at my high school
same. I started to drive around town in my car just to feel less lonely during these times
Well, it's kind of the same for me. I don't even mean that I feel lonely. I guess I miss the sense that people around are me do express positive energy, that they can go about their daily life which has ups and downs in an uninterrupted way. I guess what others me is the fact that so many lfes has been turned into havoc. I do not feel lonely. Actually I'm pretty busy with remote work and some course which I attend and which, hopefully, I am about to finish and have exams from. But still this siutation is slowly taking a toll at my emotions too since I feel so many people around me scared, stressed, confused, internally conflicted, business people not knowing what will happen to their business the next day etc. Even my study group gets me this feeling so I'm trying to motivate them not to let their time to go to waste, to organize somehow, to make good , productive use of their time. And sometimes this is the only thing we can do under circumstances like these: support local business or people you admired/ liked as professionals before, motivate people you work or study with, if you still work do your work the best you can despite all the obstacles, learn something that can make your progress in life later on once things get back to normal. If you feel lonely try to interact with folks even online. After all you're not the only lonely person out there, and probably you're not the only introverted person out there having a strong emotional response to it all.
It's been hitting me hard, too. I've actually been exhausted no matter how much I sleep for the past several days. I have never experienced anything like this. It's just odd.
I'm responding to your comment from bed after just sleeping for 10 hours. Honestly, I could sleep for 10 more if I let myself. I'm sorry you're also feeling so exhausted but it's relieving, in a way, to know that it is happening to other people too. This will pass. Stay well :)
Honestly, I'm so relieved to know I'm not the only one feeling the way I am. I'm definitely feeling slightly sick myself but not in a real way. My stomach doesn't feel good, I've tried to get out but I just don't feel good enough to do so. I definitely could lay in bed and sleep the entire day, no issue. I just feel like I'm wasting so much time.
Steven Selby Maybe you should be tested. Lethargy is one of the symptoms. That’s the exact reason why Tom Hanks got tested.
@@lilianmcleod7099 I'll see if I'm able to, Texas is very behind on testing and unless you're at risk, you don't get tested.
5htp - pharmacies have it... helps with depression
I was depressed for 5 years with medication. I was feeling like you for a long time. I was privileged as well. Then I started to create myself from the beginning. I started new healthy habits. Quitted toxic people. Started doing Calisthenics. Started eating healthier. I quitted smoking. Started reading more books. Started meditation. Now i play piano which makes me so happy! I lost all my friends and broke up with my girl i was dating for 8 years. I was alone. But That was a gift because i finally found the time to find the real me! A spiritual journey has lonely moments but loneliness is precious. Where there is silence you can hear everything. After all this work i did, I lost my father from cancer at 70 years old. I wasn't ready but I was. It's been 3 months since his loss but the bottom line is this: Self love. Most of the times it is enough. Staying alone and being happy with it its the soul's treasure.
With Love from Greece, Jason!
By the way check out my song Pain I composed for my father on my YT channel!
Thank you 4 this :) I hope youre doing well
Hey! Thank you for writing this. I recently am going through the phase of loneliness myself...totally broken and shattered. I don't know what should I do and where should I start. Its just a mental war I am fighting with. But your story has just motivated me to take one step at a time and try to learn to understand myself.
You have the most genuine eyes and personality I’ve ever seen in a man. That gives me a lot of hope.
Going to be honest with you...
On a daily basis I search through UA-cam hoping to find videos I genuinely connect with. About 99% of the time the videos I come across are in my eyesight for no more than a minute. After finding your channel, I have watched 5 videos in their entirety in under a day of being subscribed. I think this is for a few reasons. I feel a lot of the topics you speak about hit close to home. I also think majority of the time we try to have these conversations with others who either a) don't want to confront it or b) "think it's too deep" - it's difficult. Through quarantine, I'm really trying to not look at all the things I'm missing out on, but rather realizing the absence of things that truly make me happy. Once we're through this, not taking those things for granted and doing them more. No matter how it's perceived.
"We accept the love we think we deserve." -the perks of being a wallflower
Me: wow, I’m introverted and quarantine will be the best time in my life
Also me: I guess I’m extraverted
I still think I'm introverted, but I really miss doing stuff with my closest friends
Yeah there is a difference between staying in home with your own will and staying in home without your will. I rarely go outside. But now I wanna go out so much. I will go outside more once this quarantine ends all by myself.
Joe T. Same I’ve decided that I really should go out more. It’s true the hardest thing is not having a choice but to stay inside
MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY!
Emma Bunch-Benson Everything is a social construct; this is a non-argument designed to shut down further discussion of a topic.
But yes, introversion-extroversion is a nuanced spectrum, if we’re to accept its theory.
I always have to remind myself to “be” rather than “do”.
nice point
what does that mean?
@@alfiemarie Don't simply focus on what you're doing and what you have to do to reach your goals, sometimes it's alright to take some time to just enjoy being- being is much different from doing because it's those times where we're just sitting down talking with someone we care about that truly make us happy.
“If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” - C.S. Lewis
Regarding this quote/narrative, I think the modern and especially western humanity are too much focused on satisfaction and think that this must be baseline in our lives, while the baseline should be based on regularly being busy with providing yourself a shelter and food like in the past. Life is not only happiness it is rollercoaster with ups and downs, so accept it. So if you aim only for ups you will even fall off your rollercoaster car as a period with adversity strikes in your life. People do not deal anymore with adversity or difficulties before entering a period of happiness, most people nowadays get without effort a dopamine shot in their brain
"We've taken the tools and the techniques that were meant to give us more time and space in our lives for the important stuff, and ended up filling all of our time and space with those tools and techniques." Dang, that's eye opening.
"Happiness is only real when shared"
Into the wild
Happiness starts within, which starts with being OK with who you are. Then it's even better to share it.
“Tough times don’t last, but tough people do...”
Thanks for opening the conversation up on this, Nathan.
“Happiness is only real when shared.” I’d recommend watching the movie Into The Wild, or even just looking into the story of Chris McCandless to see just what kind of effect isolation and loneliness have on our emotions and opinions, whether it be forced, like the situation we’re in, or by choice, as Chris did when he decided he wanted to remove himself from society. The similarities between these two scenarios are super interesting!
I love that movie!
I thought about the movie and this quote throughout the whole video, in the end we are all connected one way or another, and while individuality has it's importance, being open and connected to others also needs a part our lives, we shouldn't go to one extreme or the other, but have both, balanced
Edit: Many individualists who worked on self improvement on their whole lives and had a near death experience, saw that they neglected people too much, that they closed themselves in their shell, and the near death experience made them see that clearly, and changed their priorities going forward.
Yes this is my favourite movie and there’s so much wisdom in those words
the book is much more telling than the movie
Oliver swack yes I’ve read the book too and I totally agree!
I love this solitude to be honest. I've never been good at making friends, so when I finally gave up on that I gave up on a lot of stress.
I think it's a matter of accepting that not much really matter in this world, including ourselves. That's what keeps me going.
I've been extremely lonely the past few days as well. I have never thought about needing help until now. Please send help.
I wish I can give you some encouraging words. It's good that you've found the pleasure to reconnect with people which I haven't. I wonder why I can't just be alone and happy at the same time. It's impossible. Crying everyday is exhausting but I find relief in that. What a weird time. What a weird feeling.
You'll get over these feelings, trust me 😁
Hey, if you want to talk give me a shout. I'm in a similar position
Many are willing to talk to you but they are afraid that they'll be called as creep when they offer help online (comment section). I faced this problem before. I'm willing to talk to you btw.
hey, I'm also willing to talk or just share some of my favorite poetry or youtube videos. maybe we have some stuff in common or can spend a few seconds chatting
“The feeling of loneliness springs up in me as a consequence of feeling misunderstood”
There was a moment once when a friend truly understood why I was crying without me having to say a word, she explained it out loud better than I think I even understood yet. I don’t think she knows just how much that meant to me, to feel truly understood. I also feel lonely when others don’t understand me or know me well enough, and I understand that is also on me to let them in and share more with them.
*We all go through feelings of loneliness. FaceTime someone and remember, you are loved.*
Nah, just go visit them. Somethings are worth dying for.
I’ve noticed that the more I focus on what I truly love doing, something I’m truly passionate about-the less lonely I feel. I get this feeling of fulfillment working every single day to get closer to my dreams. My passions is sharing personal finance tips on UA-cam and we’ve already gone up by 555 subscribers and it’s barely been a month🥳Follow your dreams Nathaniel🙏🏻
Man loneliness and isolation is so hard ... as a Syrian in Sweden I wish i have died in the war before coming to this level ... no social life, everyone has steryotype about me and more worse the weather and introvert people in this society ... feels like no place on the whole earth .......I will do my best t ochange my situation and then move to another place perhaps finding something new
I'm rooting for you, Alan. I hope you find happiness, do not give up!
I hope things get easier for you Alan...remember ‘this too shall pass’. Inshallah. 🙏🏽
This is one of the most beautiful videos I have seen. To stand up and embrace all the feelings. To try understand them rather them lock them in a box and hide them in a corner under some other inboxed feelings. Loneliness is a really scary, we have put so much fear in that word that we don't want to see it in the eye and say : hello, why have you come and how can I help you. We can say that easily to other people but not to ourselves. Thank you for reminding me 🙏 🌻
This was the first time I've heard, "Life isn't a sprint and it's not even a marathon. It's a relay race." So much gold I can relate to in this piece. Had to pause the vid so many times just so I can write down each word.
(Side fun note: play video at 50% speed. Makes it sound like we're drunk having a deep convo over drinks with Nathan. 🤣😅)
As a person who takes so much pride in suppressing my feelings about loneliness, this is so relatable! I am starting to see the pattern again and it looks like an awakening mostly, an urge to fill up all the voids that was always there left unfilled. I am on a constant search for mental clarity too and honestly, I'm completely clueless where it would lead me. Sometimes what I fear is the amount of openness that I'm exposed to, while learning all about my emotions. Almost like it has the ability to make me and break me at the same time. All that's reliable is the hope that the future has to offer more. Anyway it's a search for us all. At least that's what I feel...
Sanjay Skar I got one tip for you brother and it’s to read the book Letting Go by Dr David Hawkins I think you would really benefit from it.
@@ChasingObstacles Thank you! A book suggestion is always the best! I will check that out!! :)
Sanjay Skar
Reading your comment made me wonder what the reason is that you get so much pride in suppressing your feelings of loneliness?
@@paramaduits558 I gotta admit it's the good old dumb idea of "what would others think if I openly say things", which is one of the few things that I'm working so hard to change. I'm making a difference at least to say it out here on this platform. And that sentence also implies how well Nathaniel does it. It takes a lot of courage to say the way he says those. :) :D I hope you understood!!
Didn't expect anyone would notice this comment. But thanks to those who replied and said they feel this too! :)
“If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.” Seneca
I really like this quote, it provided me with some valuable insights into my life.
like being a person who faces with his problems not running from it, can be the change in that quote
You breach topics many people are too embarrassed or scared to touch - loneliness, anxiety, happiness, etc - in a way that is both beautiful and comprehensible. Thank you for sharing your beautiful mind!
Loneliness has such a domino effect on so many things in your life.
I’ve noticed that, as a straight-A student in high school, the difference between studying with friends at school and studying at home for such a long time is very noticeable. I’ve really let myself go.
It's exactly the same for me haha
I found that working at the library allowed me to get school work done very quickly and efficiently, but at home I got distracted easily and can't focus as much as I want to 🤔
@@lucasc2152 I'm in high school at the moment, during my final year, and I have hit rock bottom since this began. I really hope that I can get through this. I don't even recognise myself anymore.
Damn this really, really hit me. I'm introverted as hell, but I still need to connect with people and be around them. It's been nice to recharge a bit, but I feel like at this point I've recharged enough to goto a party every night for at least a week straight haha. Thank you for this. Might be my favourite video of yours so far. Take care, Nathaniel. 🖤
I am an introvert and over the last years have quiet isolated myself. Wasn't really going anywhere, always doubted myself and had thoughts about me that simply are not right. Ironically now that everyone has to quiet isolate themself I start to get the feeling of wanting to go out and meet others and just miss this "regular public life" that basically has been shut down. I look forward to after all this go to the cinema alone, sit down in a cafe atleast once a month and just try to be more there. Sometimes opportunities are only visible when they're no longer there. Stay safe and healthy everyone and thanks Nathaniel for all of this 💙
Yeah that's how I feel too(introvert as well). Nothing much to hear but covid19. Also I am stressing out and getting agitated more easily. 😞
Das Das ... felt the same too, over here. Thanks so much for your honest sharings. Take care, everyone 🙏💖🌷
Me : thinking about feeling lonely
UA-cam algorithm: say no more
same haha
same 😂
Haha
oh my, the upper and under sentence you wrote line up with each other and it's satisfying.
Joshua Liu this...
You sound like you've been on the same journey I have: 'your morning routine isn't a personality trait'. I went through a period of obsessive self improvement, gorging on productivity content, honing my morning routine, meditating for hours. And it got to a point where I almost didn't want to meet up with my mates, as that would throw off my rhythm.
But now, I don't worry quite so much about all that. I take the lessons I've learned, and I live a more active, meditative, productive life than I did before. But I also give myself space to hang out with my friends, chill with my gf, and, most importantly, do dumb, impulsive, fun shit sometimes. Without reading stoic philosophy daily, or meditating (unless I'm super stressed), I've found a balanced middle way.
All this productivity content is great, but its not the end goal. The goal has to be to be happy, and to be connected to people you love.
this, this, this!! I can't agree enough
It has been so scary to look inward and even start this journey. Adding to it, you rarely find people who understand and can talk to, as people get into religious aspects. Channels like yours have given me so much courage to start this journey of observing and trying to understand everything about mental health and my emotions and to make changes in my lifestyle that is actually making me feel better. I'm in the initial phase of making changes in my lifestyle and there is a lot to learn. But yeah, Thank you so much. Sending you light.
I am getting increasingly fed up with the words "rational" and "irrational". It implies the binary systems of "mind vs matter", "heart vs mind" etc. Our existence is *steeped* on emotion, rationality needs contact with the material in order to create any sort of framework and our thoughts are not separate from what we feel; our emotions themselves aren't messy, the mess comes from the conflict between what we feel and what we THINK we should feel (thanks, society! /s). Our so-called rationality is nothing but a human-made concept we invented to separate ourselves from any other creature and thus prove our "superiority" or something of the sort.
We are so damn enamored with the idea of it as a society that we have been taught to ignore our emotional needs and now they are our ultimate weakness; we are so blinded by our own intellect's sense of self importance, we don't even realize how much we rely on our senses and our emotions. When we see the repercussions of our own intellect's emotional neglect we then we blame our "irrational" side for causing us this discomfort in the first place.
The problem isn't our emotions. It is us ignoring and underestimating the importance of those emotions in favor of so-called "rationality". Pure intellect, complete objectivity doesn't exist! Stop trying to be "rational", because WE aren't! And that's not something to lament.
Perfectly said!
I agree with you. Feelings are very important and we need to learn to be aware of our emotions in any moment.
Maybe you are onto something, but it has to be presented more simply and clearlu. I could barely follow you
very well said! i am so fed up with people wanting to make me feel better or different or whatever. emotions are just emotions! you dont have to rate them, let them be and everything will fall into place just like its supposed to be. not that its easy. but its very simple....
Underrated comment. I agree with most of that
I find that venturing into finding the "God-self" through spirituality has made me whole but has also strangely distanced me from others. Not on their part but there comes a great sense of peace but solitude when one faces and resolves their inner "demons" and starts to see the roles that are played on a daily basis. What truly belongs to someone and what doesn't. What is real vs what is taught to be. I found myself grieving the fact that many around me have not plunged into themselves or grieving old aspects of myself. With that I ask myself "should I just pretend to fit in?". The truth is that there is no going back but at the same time I respect that there are many levels to reach within finding the self. After staying at a level of peace and neutrality, I am ready to venture into joy and connecting with others once again. I find that I have to almost retrain myself to now completely feel others but at the same time remaining in my center to be able to bond and bring out change. It has been a challenging path but one that I have greatly appreciated because it has brought me closer to knowing who I am. I just wanted to share because I relate greatly to your content. Know that what you do by sharing your thoughts and point of view help break a big barrier and brings many together. You are a natural speaker and I deeply thank you for the authentic voice you put out there.
Totally feel you on this. At least we all know we are not alone. Keep up the great work and bringing honesty to UA-cam. You are a great model and inspiration for all of us small Tubers :)
Yes, we are all in this together and have to lean on one another for inspiration and motivation!
@@karenmcgregor9956 Yes, and thank god for the internet. We are blessed to be able to stay so connected to one another through technology. I can't imagine how people felt with this 100 years ago during the Spanish Flu.
@@AllenDMedia What I'm going to offer is based on a conversation with an aunt who recounted her role in that desperate period and still marvelled many years later that she had nursed everyone in the family, but never been the least bit sick herself.
The individuals who were sick were lying in bed at home being nursed. They survived and slowly recovered or they didn't quite oblivious of anyone else's suffering. There was no medical system or ER to which they could turn. Few called a doctor as they couldn't afford it. Those who were well got on with the back-breaking work of nursing others in environments (without electricity or the modern conveniences we enjoy today) and providing the sustenance required of those in their immediate circle.
Anyone outside that loop was irrelevant. Many didn't have a radio. A newspaper delivered information several days, perhaps even weeks after the fact. You were in your own bubble whether it was fighting for your life, caring for those who were ill, and burying the dead.
The narratives are gold, perfect in every sense, and also one of the best outros out there that I've ever seen, it's mind blowingly heart-wrenching in good way a nostalgic feeling of memories in every shot.
This channel is SO underrated, he is truly an inspiration to my thoughts
Idk why I scream "Aww" when seeing the title
"I will never leave you nor forsake you." Heb 13:5. The best verse ever.
Christine C amen
Yes!! This is comfort and wisdom. God created us for fellowship with Him and when we have that we have the capacity to have purpose and the ability to be content with ourselves and the ability to love and fellowship with others.
👏🌱 love
Yes! God longs to have a relationship with us. When we do, the loneliness goes away. He'll always be there. He loves us and cares about us. The void we feel is for God to fill. We don't have to live in loneliness.
The sad thing about loneliness
is that people tend to cope to it with addiction to something
That invisible pain is nothing to this fused with constant pain. I was on a similar path, very similar, before being struck at a similar age not sure yours but just after turning 22. Essentially went from trekking in the Himalayas to bedridden for eight years, glorious interlude and now 20 years. Much as I empathize, imagine all this with that, as that is the reality for so many rare disease intractable pain patients and those with sudden disability overnight, but for life. Always enjoy your videos and perspective but do spare I thought for those less blessed. Wish you well brother.
I've been watching your videos for a couple of years now and I find the way your train of thoughts evolved fascinating. What is more fascinating is the way you share it with us in a concise manner. Through your videos, I can say that you and I are very similar in a lot of ways so when you talk about things that even I can't explain about myself, it makes me feel understood and less lonely. Keep doing what you're doing!
all the excitement for being able to do shit 24/7 has quickly faded
“Your morning routine isn’t a personality” BOOM!
How tiring would it be that wasn't the case 😬
I make videos on careers, education, family and entertainment. If you have time would love it if you checked out my channel brother. Salams 🙂
That comment about the question " How are you feeling? / How are you?", I am from Slovakia and people never really ask you these questions as a first question when you meet somebody because it's actually quite personal questions to ask and it always gets me thinking deeper about the answer and then I realize that I don't know that person well so why would they even ask me that if they don't mean it? Basically, I think people should ask it if they actually mean to find out what's bothering you or general honest curiosity should be behind these questions. How are you feeling / how are you to me here in the UK is more like hello, people don't even expect you to answer the question cos they're in the hurry anyway. Glad you raised that point. And holly shit totally right about the vocabulary about these crazy times. I admire that you know what to focus on in order to find out where the problem is and why it's happening. Keep up the good reflection.
so what do people from Slovakia say instead? Just a hello?
@@mariemmattoussi7469 Pretty much. I'm from Poland living in Canada now and I remember how I was weirded out by people when asked How I am and I started saying this and that and they looked at me like I'm dumb or from Mars. Bro... you fucking asked me a personal question and it was super rude when someone just said How are you and just passed me by. Shit like that don't happen in Poland and most European countries. People aren't as fake as in the west and yes, we just say Good Morning etc without this How are you with clown smile LOL and we ask friends how they are because we care and want to listen what they maybe did recently, just what's up with their lives or situations. With strangers we don't fuck around with how are yous. It's a pleasant Good Morning and straight to business.
kubasniak That’s not really rude, it’s a cultural difference. We also say “what’s up” in english to our friends to mean “hi” sometimes without actually literally meaning to ask what they’re up to, once again that’s not rude, it’s just a phrase in that’s developed a different meaning in our culture. Saying how are you with a smile is not fake, that’s just how you’re interpreting it. But where I live people do often care and are nice to strangers. You don’t get that in England, and I personally like it. I think it depends on what you’re used to.
@@mariemmattoussi7469 you say hello to only friends, family, and sometimes strangers. I guess the reason why we're a bit less open to having casual banter is because of the past. You know when we were occupied by Russians, there was a lot of things that weren't allowed. Like listening music from abroad and also if you had anything against communism you were chased and kicked out of the country. That's why it takes a wee while to gain people's trust.. But nowadays is a bit better I guess. I live in Scotland so I did change as well. Grateful that I become more open-minded. AS I always say it's still always down to the individual.
@@abcxyz4653 you're totally right, the past that plays a big role and also the culture. But at the end of the day, it's always down to the individual. I wouldn't say also that all the people who ask you how are you are fake, cos I have a lot of friends here in Scotland who do care so much more than my friends back home. Maybe the media is showing the main-stream shitty tv program that exists just to numb people's brains and it doesn't really give us some valuable experience. And then it seems like every how are you is fake. It's not. But I get that from time to time when it happened it made me feel very uncomfortable cos I could tell it wasn't asked with care. But hey ho nobody is perfect and people learn to be better every day :). I appreciate any comments and love rambling
Hey Nathaniel, your thought process is profound. It’s curious and digs deep. I’ve always appreciated your work.
It’s a difficult time, we’ve been put in situations where our old belief systems have been challenged. It’s a mess, however that may fit with someone’s situation. I’ve experienced loneliness in this time and it makes me wish I had a pet. We will get through this. Thank you
I applaud you so much for being vulnerable with your subscribers and showing that you are going through something many of us are. On UA-cam and social media in general, so many people seem to live happy lives, even during this pandemic. That is incredible hard seeing all the time when you are a lonely person. You are incredible!
In these times focus on good food, sleeping habits & working out. And if something is outside of your control try and shift your attention, there is nothing you can do. Be proactive, strengthening the immune system is the best action you can take. Stay safe yall 🍀🌎
When I was living in mom's house and the rest of my family I felt like I needed my own space. Then, I finished college I got finally my own place and yes. I started feeling lonely, because I needed someone I can talk to. When I met girl who wanted to spend lots of time with me , I felt like I had to give up from my personal space, it was like and invasion into something I built and took me time to have.
So, I learned that I really enjoyed spending time with family and friends, but also I know that those times of being lonely will come and probably they'll wake some tough times. I learned to enjoy solitude because it's something personal and unique for you. Also, I definitely enjoy the company of a good friend and my mom. I celebrate each moment. Life is not a race, it's a journey.
Hello from Cozumel.
That's an adjustment that I also needed to make. I love solitude, but I also love living with my girlfriend. It's just the balance. Sometimes when I need my space I just talk to her about it or go outside on my own for a few hours. The best part is that the same goes with her. Best of luck from Bulgaria! :)
"Man is, at one and the same time, a solitary being and a social being."
You can be introvert, ambivert, or extrovert, but with time and age, or during the time of probe (now?) you will start seeing your inner needs whom you haven't allowed to speak before. The truth is, that on the way of improving ourselves and thriving for being better and better, wanting perfection, we start wearing the coat of egoism and tend to forget about the world around us. We are connected but also disconnected at the same time. Yet once we lose things we were taking for granted - let it be people around us, the life of the city, simple interactions, or freedom, we realise we miss something...
We are all dependant on people, on being part of society. We all need these normal human feelings - fear, loneliness, happiness, feeling of belonging, love... These feelings make us human after all... And if you discover new feelings and allow them to speak, you will learn something about yourself.
Some life lessons come with age, some with experiences, some by chance, or during such an uncertain time. How you will use it? You have the choice. Wish you all the best!
Man, I've been watching your videos for some time and must say, with every video you are getting better and better in presenting your message to the audience. The music, the clips you put in the video, everything... And now this one arrived and I'm speechless after watching (not counting this message I really had to wrote). And the ending... incredible, powerful. Thank you.
I love your honesty and approach to this sensitive topic. Feeling lonely is something we can all relate to - especially now. I've been asking myself the same question over and over again: Have I been chasing the right things - and is that even possible? I believe that all things in life happen for a reason and maybe now is the time to rethink the way we have been living our lives. Thank you for your videos, they are incredibly inspirational and valuable.
For me personally, when I felt the most lonely in my spiritual journey was when I couldn’t find someone that felt/thought similar to me. I had all of this newfound knowledge of myself and about the human experience in general but no one to share it with because they wouldn’t understand. That’s the thing about loneliness, it’s a craving to feel understood and validated. To connect deeply with someone that just “gets it.” And it’s ok! It’s a natural part of the human experience. The thing is tho, the only person that truly needs to accept, understand, and validate our thoughts and feelings is ourself. Which is DAMN HARD lol but it is so, so rewarding when you can finally accept all aspects of yourself, the good and the bad. You start to know and love yourself on such a deep level that you no longer care if you are misunderstood. And naturally, you are able to connect authentically and be more vulnerable with others. Sending love and light to all, please know that you are never alone in the way you feel ❤️❤️
Yocelyn YEEEEEEESSS!!!♥️♥️♥️
So am I Nathaniel but watching your videos and creating some myself helps so much!
“How is your heart?” Is my opener of choice when catching up periodically with people. It takes a minute to answer, and almost demands introspection. Not that I have a heads up, but I’ve been away from “home” (NYC) for almost 5yrs to write and parent alone basically in the jungle. I live in a part of a country that isn’t really interested in diversity, so it’s been probably more solitude than I originally bargained for.....but there’s a flow that eventually happens too in the quiet and space.... and it’s glorious.
Did you get that from the movie “New Years Day” by any chance? Because ever since i saw that movie I do that too.
Mario I never saw that movie....but now I most certainly will. It’s just a habit I developed when I really started deepening my meditation practice. How I speak to myself. Plus I absolutely hate small talk. Either it makes folks dive deeper into themselves, or retreat. And I’m here for it.
Emma Bunch-Benson Sometimes it automatically offers a safe space for people to real with their answers. “Oh, I’m good” or “Fine” doesn’t suffice. Try it out and see how it works. Ask yourself the same regularly.
I resonate to this 100% Thank you for your honesty and transparency. I just found you and your content today. You've inspired me, made me think, and helped me in my situation not to feel alone. I appreciate you sharing and your ability to flawlessly communicate your inner feelings. Im looking forward to diving deeper into the beautiful art you've created on this channel.
Hoping soon you will find a long term solution and relief from this lonely feeling.
I am 44 and I only felt lonely when I was around people, near ones or others . I even never owned a TV, I felt accompanied...
I do watch UA-cam now, because I have a choice what I wish to see/hear. Happy to come across You Nathaniel. What you say now, I had a lot similar thoughts before you were born. I feel very connected, you sound very familiar.
Sending Blessings, in abundance! 💙
I feel like this crisis is teaching us how precious the small things are that we often overlook, like being able to see friends and family regularly. I really hope we learn something from this...
This probably sounds really weird but when I feel lonely the only way for me to describe it is I feel like I’m suffocating. Physically I can breathe fine but idk it’s weird and horrible feeling.
It's like you can't release something from yourself, holding it in, but it craves to go outside.
I have felt that way several times last year so I know what you mean.
@@elishac2254 go convert people somewhere else, religious bitch.
I feel the opposite. Now that all my neighbours are staying at home and being noisy through the floors and walls I would love nothing more than getting my solitude back.
decentradical 😂
Haha I totally get you 😂
Literally your video looks like you took my brain and thoughts out of my brain. I think the same way how this whole thing happening around us made some of us connect so much deeper within ourselves... I feel proud of you to share everything over here and make people realize we are not the only ones thinking this way.... Big thank you!
I have never seen better videography in my life. BRILLIANT!!! Thank you Nathaniel, you are light!
I’ve definitely been dealing with this too! I have weekly zoom “dates” with my friends and that honestly helps ALOT! You could maybe set something like that up to connect with subscribers it’ll make you feel less alone during this crazy time 😌
Man when you are starting your podcast?
Your voice is so soothing 😌
I've been 'self isolating' for a year now while studying and just as I've finished, everyone is self isolating and the whole world is in lockdown... This timing is just depressing.
The Lemon Eater maybe a reminder to not put off life for after school or this or that.. it’s tough, I’ve definitely done the same thing repeatedly over my life so far. It’s hard when school or work takes over such a large amount of our time and focus, I wish it could be more balanced.
I absolutely relate to this, it's really tough :(
Wow - I wondered if I am ok but finally I see I am not the only one and being resentful towards others when misunderstood is not just me. Thanks man - this is the first video of yours I've seen. I am on the other side of the planet from my family. And you helped me today with describing that loneliness. Like that, I feel a bit less lonely and a bit more understood. Thanks Nathaniel! Lucy
Its 3am, coming across your videos just now and immediately subscribed. First things first, your narcissistic abuse video brought me to your channel, I've have watched almost every video. What's going on right now is difficult, we are in our heads most days, it can be killer. Hang in there and stay focused!