Weight, food plan, desperate, parents, help, FAITH, hopeless, positive, stay focused, no help, GOD
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
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Hi dear! On this channel I will share my journey with you how NOT to die from anorexia... I am still alive by the grace of God. I have suffered from all kinds of eating disorders since 31 years (!!) now. It is a miracle that I am still alive! And though I seem to be 'at my last end', I will keep trusting that I am still alive for a reason. One of which is to share my story with you. I will give all I have to give as long as I keep breathing. And I hope that you can use it for the better to prevent you and/or your beloved to suffer as much from this disease as I have. Topics I certainly will address: anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, orthorexia, intestine issues, intolerances, fear, anxiety, what I eat in a day, panic attacks, urges, overeating, undereating, purging, medical help, hospitalisation, inpatient treatment, outpatient treatment, twelve step program, spirituality, Higher Power... and so much more! Subscribe and like not to miss out on anything.
I really want you to beat this. But you walked out of the hospital of your own accord and with all the usual eating disorder excuses. Remember, you are speaking probably to mostly people who have been down this road. We heard it all. We've seen it all. Until you accept that you are the biggest obstacle to your own recovery you're not going to get better. That's the harsh truth. Stick to meal plans, do what you are supposed to do - STOP binging, purging and starving. What's going to happen if you stop those behaviors? You put off death? You might actually start recovering? I only see win-win there. If that is what you WANT. You have to relinquish all of your perceived control over food. You don't have anymore time to fool around with this. And if you are lucky enough to get in the hospital again - STAY THERE. I really wish you the best and send all of my love. But you have to do the hard part.
I was once your weight, my family didn’t help and no hospital wanted to take me and I had co existing medical issues..I know the despair you are feeling well..I was scared to go to sleep at night because I didn’t know if I would wake up..there isn’t Ed places anywhere that know how to handle physical complications and recovery..I know I hoped something would be out there but I had to accept what I needed didn’t exist…when I increased my intake on my own…people could see I was serious about wanting to recover..I had to show people and then help came..the help I got was the best I could find but wasn’t great..I had to eat with pain and have people not understand all the medical issues..my recovery was just hard work, it wasn’t a miracle and during recovery I suffered permanent neurological damage..even though I was eating then..it all caught up.
I didn’t have time to wait for better treatments..I don’t think you have time to wait either..I drank supplements multiple times a day and used heat packs for pain..it was the hardest thing but I was going to die if I didn’t and the idea of the type of help I had in my head that I needed didn’t exist. Please start helping yourself…it’s the only way out of this.
My story is exactly like yours.I did the bloody thing myself,otherwise you die waiting
@@yeahbro760 yes it is possible…even after a thirty year struggle, I was able to eat again freely
hi, may I ask a question to better understand how ED works? is it the fear of gaining weight that makes it hard to recover?
@@earthmoonstars2013 it can be many things..and the fear changes throughout different phases of the recovery process…fear of gaining weight, fear of actually eating, fear of specific foods..fear of losing control, fear of trusting medical teams advice, fear of losing an identity of being the sick one, fear of finding out who you are beneath the illness, fear of feeling emotions instead of being emotionally numb from restriction…for many the mental side of the illness includes negative self talk..tormenting thoughts of self abuse telling you not to eat…the mix is different for everyone and changes throughout recovery..initially people want to cling to their own rules that make them feel safe and feel threatened by making changes…it’s a war within yourself..ambivalence of both wanting to get well but feeling unable to change and do things differently ..you have to force yourself to do things that don’t make sense to your own mind most of the time…in order to restore heath to your mind and body
I wish people understood this. The fact that doctors don't know everything and there are people who push the limits of what they are able to do. This was my experience with alcoholism. It's terrifying how many doctors don't understand that physical complications that come from wd. They also carry the same stigmas against addicts that other people do.
Ok..and this is just from my perspective…when l see you talk Lique..l see you make the excuses and the reasons for why you validate leaving hospital….this is not you …this is the disease talking..with all due respect when you are at such a low weight you are not in the mindset to think rationally and l say this with all due respect..I’m sorry this may be triggering but when you gain weight and aren’t in the total grasp is anorexia then your mind becomes more open to recovery…l can see that spark in you ..and it’s not a question of anyone saying l told you so…it’s just a lot of people feeling powerless because they can’t help you…you’re an intelligent woman that knows what she has to do to recover…but actually doing it is not as simple as it sounds…recovery is very physically uncomfortable…but you have to persevere…with anorexia it takes a long time for the mind to catch up with the body…when you receive the needed nutrients…but your anorexia mindset wants to argue..I’m saying this respectfully because I’ve been through it…and I’ve noticed some of the comments here may seem judgmental but people are frustrated because they just want to fix you and make sure you’re well 🌸
next time you get into ED treatment and want to leave again, please rewatch this video!!!
I said the exact same thing!
It's such a shame you didn't stay in hospital. 😥 They were looking after you. I know you found it hard but I just so saddened you left hospital xxx
They did not look after her . They were without a proper plan and made misstakes and confusion .
@@l.k.orsamaggiore3443 oh ok thanks for clarifying for me. I just fear for her being on her own alot of the time. With her diabetes out of control. I kind of liked it when she was in a safe space being taken care of xxx
That's solely her side of the story. I'm sure there is much more to the story. She even stated in a video she eats more than her obese friends. That is physically impossible,,but her eating disorder causing her delusions.
@@kathk3203 I Believe it's in her interest to get well if she wants to continue to walk on this globe . She has a profession and can easily work brilliantly if only she gets back in health and on track . Living on youtube donations for the fun of it is not her style . She's not a brainless tick-tocker but an intelligent women fighting her problems and reaching back for a a life to live outside youtube .
It was keeping her alive actually .
We empathize with you but you left the hospital. We are now just enabling you at this point.
No one enables me dear. I make my own choices AND mistakes. Just sharing. But I really agree I make mistakes! The consequences are mine to take in.
Presumably the boring food is to work towards a healthier routine, build up your gut bacteria and get away from the binge/purge cycle. It’s a pity that you didn’t stay in the hospital until the program was completed when they took you in. Now that you left, it seems that being there was just a waste of your time and theirs. It’s understandable that they will now prioritise people who are more likely to benefit from their treatment over you. If you truly want to recover you need to commit to following their instructions and stop using the disease as an excuse to beg for love and money. I’m sorry to be harsh but you taking control of the situation is not working. I wish you the best.
You’ve created an identity so deeply rooted in your disease that you’re now afraid to exist outside of it. That is the bottom line. Whether it’s dangerously low glucose levels, desperate sickness or something else you have made being “sick” who you are.
I agree with this. And she has made money off of it as well and so its almost a positive thing somehow. I feel this channel is not healthy for her aside from all of the financial benefits at this point she is getting.
@@kathk3203 What do you mean by that? @VidMerge she told us in her videos that she has intestines issue. Meaning her body is not able to absorb nutrients regardless of how much she eats ? I'm also wondering why her family isn't helping her? Is there a story behind the scene as to why her family isn't helping her? Are you insinuating that all her illnesses, she did it to herself and that is why her family just simply no longer offers help ?
I really wish you didn't leave the hospital in the first place... Please just go back. Go to emergency.
I'm sorry to see you in sich struggle. Unfortunately, you can't wait for anybody to help you, only you can help yourself. If you choose to not die, you have to do what you are told. There are no miracles ❤️
She can't help herself. Anorexia patients CAN'T help themselves.
@@helenchaffer I really think you're being far too harsh. She is not making excuses. Have you ever had anorexia or the diabetes she has?
@@helenchafferEating disorders are so complicated, it’s not just about simply eating. The psychological component, the root, needs to be nurtured. Healing the root will allow for the ease of physically beginning to eat and be healthier again. It’s a lifelong fight to be well with this kind of devastating illness.
Miracles are everywhere, Silvia. Believe 🙏 Ask and you shall receive
She is all about excuses. Diabetes 3c is not an actual medical term or diagnosis, however it's as a result of her anorexia. The correction for that is not leaving the treatment center she is in, and stop trying to control it. She literally tried to claim she eats more than her obese friends. That's actually delusional. She isn't being 100 percent truthful. I not only think she is enveloped in her ED, but also the drama of being sickly. Centers can't keep taking her when she isn't compliant. There are those that truly want to get better. Listen to her videos, it's all dead ends according to her. It's an excuse to not get help
Sending you a warm hug from, the USA 🇺🇸! I wish I could send you a home nurse, a dietitian, a good cook and anything else you so desperately need! I'll keep praying for a miracle, you sure could use one now. I'm so sorry everything is so terrible right now. I'm so glad you made a video letting us know your true situation right now. I hope through the magic of the internet someone hears your pleas for help and scoops you up into a warm healing recovery center! 🙏 🙏 🙏 🙏 🙏
🙏🏻💜
Nothing changes until you change it. You need to submit to whatever plan us being offered whether you like it or not. You cannot continue on this way and expect to turn things around. I am praying for you.
She needs antidepressants urgently but she won't !!
You’re such a sweet and gentle soul, hopefully you’ll beat anorexia one day. I wish you could see it talking, taking over your being, your thoughts and actions. As obvious as it is to the people watching. It’s painful to see and I can’t imagen how hard it must be to endure. ❤️
Can you imagine how hard it is for her family?
@@avalondreaming1433 It's hard for both Ligue and her family.
Your message was the kindest on here 🙏🏻
Why did you leave the hospital ? You couldn't wait until you got a bed. You got a bed and didn't want to listen to the expert's that deal with this everyday.. So you left....
Sometimes God sends you people and if you keep turning them away then what else do you want God to do.. God helps those who helps themselves...
I have recovered myself from anorexia and eating disorders as well and had the same diabetes. I had the diabetes only in the beginning of restoring my weight as it was a symptom of being underweight and undernourished. Don’t worry about the high blood sugar, the body will utilize it all within a few hours just make sure you don’t get too low blood sugar which is deadly.
You may think you are nourished cause you are eating but the body is far behind. In hospital I was on 10000 calories daily for 3 months to restore my weight with no movement gaining at a pace of 2-5lbs per week. Don’t worry about gaining too fast, it’s not unhealthy to gain weight fast it’s unhealthy to stay underweight longer. Don’t worry about increasing food too fast it’s not unhealthy to eat too much it’s unhealthy to not get enough. There is no way for you to have too much I promise and I was told this by professionals for my whole admission from 50lbs to 110lbs.
love you and others love you and you need to love yourself to be able to fully receive this love from others.. I believe in you and you need to believe in you so you can recover then others will believe in you too. Trust yourself not the eating disorder-I know deep down you know the difference.
To gain weight per day I had 9 ensure drinks/resource(2 with each snack, 1 with each meal), 6 Cliff bars (at all 3 meals and 3 snacks) , 3 double portion meals with double carbs, protein, fat, fruit, veg and dairy/soy. Snack we’re as big as meals such as cerial, milk, 2 toast, 2 pb, banana with the bar and 2 drinks. Have an 7th/8th/10th meal/sack if you need to just make sure to get enough calories it’s the most important and what your body needs right now and for a healthy life.
I’ve recovered from anorexia and it was very difficult. I am still working on trauma therapy and that’s really at the heart of all my troubles. I never had parents to care for me, in fact they did a lot of harm.
What I’m trying to do now and what may be helpful for you, is to try and be the mother you need/needed. This sometimes mean giving ourselves tough love. Not tolerating any excuses/reasons to not care for your needs. Even when the very last thing you want to do is to eat… a good mother would make sure your body was given proper nutrition. Enough rest. Some stretching perhaps as I know you aren’t able to exercise right now. The hardest part… love yourself unconditionally.
All those are simple words that work but can be very hard to follow through with. I struggle every day. With the anorexia I recovered alone as it was a year long waiting list for help. You have to sit with the discomfort of making yourself do what needs to be done. Yes the feelings are awful… but dying is worse than temporarily feeling discomfort.
You can do this!!
Thank you dear… it is a wonderful way of looking at it.
@@liquefaith ⚘🙏🎄 Dear Lique, I've been following and am sending a (((virtual hug))). Having been through ED, family denial, Trauma therapy, etc, sometimes, all we can do is go day by day. ⚘ You're right, it's been hard to keep trusting..Thank you for sharing your vulnerability. I know how much that hurts 🙏 We're learning and growing, keep on talking & breathing. You're helping alot of people. 💜
It is hard to accept but accepting your reality and the treatment you need
is going to require releasing control.
Yes… totally true…
This is probably why I need to go so deep… to REALLY let go when my bed is finally ready 😔
I suffered from severe anxiety at one point in my life. It is terrifying to make changes. It took years of therapy and meds to work on myself.
@@liquefaith this is such a hard thing to do Lique, I've been doing it myself. It's been a real process, but I do believe that you can give up control too. Control is just an illusion. Have you listened to any Alan Watts on giving up control? His ideas have helped me. Maybe look there for some guidance? I believe so strongly in you Lique, keep exploring yourself. I know your situation is ugly, but the ideas that can develop in such an environment can be so beautiful. Just like that cliche saying, diamonds are formed under extreme heat and pressure. What you are doing here will last you far beyond this lifetime.
@@liquefaith you can start that now…instead of when a bed is available..
Choose life or death...that's it. Fight!
You have expressed your faith as something that supports you through the toughest of times ..... use this to support yourself; unlike people, it never leaves you. Have you sought support from the local church community? .... I don't mean monetary support, but the other people with the same faith. I hope things feel brighter soon and that you keep following what you have been advised to do for the moment.
I have that digital now yes. That is already helpful indeed.
I am sad to see some hateful comments. Sadly as sweet and kind and smart and beautiful as Lique Faith soul is, anorexia is an evil evil evil disease. Even if the facility is ok and they are treating her well anorexia will try to convince her that there is something wrong with the facility. Yes anorexia can be treated but it often comes with many many years of trial and error. It is difficult and frustrating and upsetting to watch but please dont forget that it is by far the most stressful and difficult thing for Lique Faith and she is so brave for even sharing what this t errible condition is like. It takes a LOT of strength to be so honest. There is no point in being mean or angry or hateful in the comments. You would NOT be angry at someone hearing voices such as someone with schizophrenia because they can’t help it. No one would CHOOSE to do this to them-self. Unfortunately the anorexia voice is so strong and powerful, it is often louder than reason or sense. Most people with anorexia have very very high IQ! It is so unfortunate that problems relating to mental illness are not treated like physical injuries caused by accidents. I believe that people in such severe stages of illness should have to legally stay in hospital or care but sadly that law is not in place in many countries. Yes it is obvious that poor Lique Faith needs help but no one can legally force her to stay at any treatment facility. It is as tempting for her to leave a facility as it is for a drug addict to try to find their next hit (different but similar addictive traits). I am sorry if this comment sounds harsh but I do not intend it to be cruel. I pray for Lique Faith every day and hope she finds the strength to achieve full recovery. I believe truly she has the strength and will one day say GET LOST to anorexia forever. I truly hope that the anorexia voice goes, I believe Lique Faiths voice is stronger 💙💙💙
It was a metaphor not to be taken literally. Anorexic behaviours are addictive and deep rooted in compulsion and obsession. People with anorexia display similar thinking patterns to those with drug addiction. That was the parallel i was drawing which I thought was pretty obvious.
Wow…
This is SO ACCURATE… and true…
I have been watching you for quite some time and I have always been very supportive (and I still am!), but already before there were some questions on my mind: how come that there is no hospital/doctor willing to accept you anymore? You already stated that no more hospitals want to do that. Why cannot / does not want your family to support you? You stated that they have done for you already so much and you also understand why they now said no. I believe such "attitude" could not happen overnight and there is some history about you that we unfortunately do not know.
I was so thrilled about month ago when I found out that you indeed managed to get into a hospital, and it basically saved your life. I did not understand (and I still do not) why you left the hospital - I know you got some kind of virus, but that alone certainly is not a reason that they sent you home (?).
And now we are again at the beginning. You need help, but no one wants to help you, not even an online consulting services!
Of course I do not know exactly what happened and your history, but the facts are - you have been sick / in treatment for almost 20 years (I roughly remember reading that, sorry if this is not accurate) and the result is that everybody is turning their back against you. Why? I also do not like that you say in this video - no one wants to help me, no hospital, not even my parents, I am desperate. Maybe they are also desperate and maybe that already helped enough?
Sorry if this was a bit rough to say, but I just wonder....
She needs to say the real reasons.Otherwise everyone is just guessing
With eating disorders it is very common for inpatient centers to deem someone past the point of recovery. The longer an ED goes on, the harder it is to get help - the medical issues combined with a non-compliant patient make recovery unlikely. And people do stop being their for addicts bc they are pro-liars (in regards to their disease). Not until a real change in behavior (and will) is observed, might people potentially come back. (I’m speaking generally of course - there are exceptions to every rule). The excuses from an ED sufferer are not unique, they are cliche. And they are repetitive.
Online therapy providers are regulated by licensing laws and can't accept imminently life threatening situations without risking their licenses. Although you're right there could be other factors at play, friends and family abandoning the chronically ill/disabled is a thing & happens all the time.
@@Karen-mu7fq yes Karen, she is not the only person who has been abandoned by the medical profession etc
To an extent it isn’t abandoning by the medical profession..in their minds they have offered all the help they can and nothing has been successful..they often view it thru a lens that further intervention might in fact do harm to the patient..it’s confronting to find you have come to the end of what people think is achievable..at that point you need to work to show people you are willing to gain weight..when their is evidence of tangible change..the professionals often re engage….but they need evidence that there has been a shift in behaviour
It’s always starts with a whisper of a voice, some pretend version of crying and then comes the louder voice. And then the rant. Over and over again. Interesting how it goes.
I notice this too !!!!
Please watch this video back if you get back into the hospital/an inpatient treatment facility like you were before and have the urge to flee again. Your brain was panicked and also telling you that you can manage your diet on your own bc you know your healthy issues/dietary issues best...on your own you've lost weight and are struggling. Please remember this when you have the urge to resist help in your inpatient treatment. You need the help of experts. You are a severe case and your mental health issue has been chronic. I wish the best for you. Keep fighting to get well
👍🏻
I've been watching your videos for a while and it seems like you live for the drama and chaos in your life. Yes you have a eating disorder but you definitely have more going on. It's always poor me, the world is against me, no one wants to help me, and when you do get help you look for every possible way to get out. You want to be in control and have your own rules but at the same time you want your eating disorder to get better. It's not going to happen. Please take a good look at yourself and your motivations. Wishing you the best ❤
Remember that ED is a mental health disorder. I see her excuses and resistance/need for control as clear as day but she doesn't. She has a mental health problem and has for many decades. It will be challenging to change her thought process.
So true everything you say .Diabetic c3 isn't that bad with the right medication. She wants to try having type 1 like my mum.she feeds off other people's sympathy. SHE made the choice to make herself ill my 3 siblings didn't with cancer.And all she's goes on about is wanting donations for this and that.God I wish if I could have give my brother one good day last year before I lost him I wud have without pain.she seems to be doing OK except for the moaning she does she choose this path
@@carolbailey1438 I understand what you´re saying and I have also lost loved ones because of cancer (the most horrible disease in my opinion). But mental diseases, such as anorexia, is also a disease. It is hard to understand and I did never have anorexia but mental diseases are not really a choice, just like it is not a choice to have cancer. I totally understand you but I also feel sorry for this girl because it is not only all her fault.
@@annettegohla8057 I understand what you are saying I have hit rock bottom myself and suffer with issue's now.I take up to 20 creons tablets a day just to eat because my pancreas doesn't digest any food otherwise and the pain is extreme. But what I am saying she still made the choices she made you can get help I did .it seems she likes the drama and asking for money.I bet between the lines she is a very hard person to please no matter what you did for her.if you get my meaning
I sometimes even wonder if all the positive reinforcement from the internet all the time reinforces the behaviour. I don't know. I'm not an expert. I definitely don't believe anyone would choose to be miserable and unhappy and suffer in this way. I do agree that there are a lot of excuses but maybe it's because the thought of getting better is terrifying. I find myself caught between feeling the utmost empathy and complete irritation. No one has ever illicited such conflicting feelings in me. I suppose that's what anorexia does. It makes you deeply care for a person but after a while you just feel you have had enough because the rigid behaviour is so infuriating. If you choose to live you have got to put in the work. I have no idea how hard it is but from what I have seen on this channel it is a formidable battle. I hope oneday you will be ok.
Yes, it is hard but at some point you need to take some responsibility here. Yes, you have an eating disorder accepted but you are well aware of what is going on and you make excuse after excuse. You have to give up the control and you have to accept that the professionals know better than you. There was help but you ran away from it and fought the system all the way. one has to question why no unit will take you... because you have not cooperated when you have been there. You can't say God will sort it out, that is a cop out. Yes, a faith is fantastic and hold on to that that at the end of the day this is up to you. Ultimately only you can make the changes and you HAVE to do that. It's bloody tough, painful and scary and everything else, of course it is, but you have to stick with it. Sorry but stop making excuses and start turning your life around. You get one chance, it is up to you. I'm aware you are going to think this is mean, it isn't, it's tough love. There is no point in saying there there there poor you because you need a wake up call. At the moment you are ruled by your anorexia so it's the anorexia I am talking to. You can get there but you have to get tough. I wish you well
I'm going to offer a different perspective here, as someone who has found herself at the brink numerous times over the years. The absolute most important element required to allow true healing to even begin for me was finding a trickle of self trust to build upon, which then allowed for a smidgen of self-love (only after realizing I wasn't a completely worthless human being). The journey, even with all its excruciatingly painful moments, has led me to find a sense of inner power I could never have imagined was possible even 1 year ago (I had been at it for many years prior but the turning point came with beginning to trust in self). There is no denying that balance can still be lost periodically, especially over some of the scary health challenges, but managing those fears continues to get better with time.
Based on my own experience, I see Angelique as being right on track and I suspect that a little more trust in herself would allow the best path forward to reveal itself more easily. I can also say with certainty that tough love is not beneficial for everyone. I, like Angelique, have travelled much of this journey alone and been criticized, misunderstood and judged - people so underestimated me and assumed their superiority, and yet most, if not all of them, will never know what true inner power feels like as I now do. At this point, I truly wouldn't change a thing from my past and believe Angelique can soon feel the same way.
I believe in Angelique and fully support her where she is. She can come out of this stronger than she even dares to dream.
Karen
Well said.
mental illness isn’t someone’s fault, anorexia is the most difficult mental illness to treat. cut her some slack
@@laserfrogrecords8560 that's the problem, people have been cutting her too much slack, it's always someone else's fault not hers, God will save her Guess what ... no he won't. She needs to save herself, stop with all the control. The next bed that comes up, stay there, do the treatment.
@@karenbutnotthatkaren5528 wonderfully said, find trust and self love. Believing you are worthy. And forgiving yourself when you make mistakes. I remember when I dealt with my perfectionism, my therapsit said I was a perfectionist… I was like… me, what? No, nothing I do is perfect… you get it? I was like I am not even worthy of that word.. is this therapist legit, was my thoughts? What have I said to make her believe that? Should I get a sane therapist? hahaha :) okey? What made her say it? Well I had a lot of stops and starts. And I judged myself so hard for not doing things right. So I quit everytime something did not work out from the start. Now I have worked on this for quite some time, and I have healed so much, I have taken on leading a whole department of technology, and I have never done that before, I also do not know how to. But I am learning, and I am reading, when I need help I ask for it, instead of hiding my incompetence I let other people in and let them lead sometimes, and I feel very confident even when I am wrong, as everybody is wrong sometimes. So much more fun and interesting my life has become. :) my mother would always tell me that I was not fit for anything useful, merely pretty. When I was learning how to ski, she would laugh because it looked funny, and whenever I could not succeed straight away at something she would give up on me. As a child I internalized it as, if I am perfect I will be loved and I will be safe. Now at 40, I am feeling safe, loved and nourished by myself, and just travelled alone for 6 weeks, and while on holiday got a promotion and accepted it without hesitation.As I trust myself to find the way as I go along, and it is something I said yes to, as I believe I have the right support. And if it does not work out? Well I know I can pick myself up again, and that I will be okay.
This is why her family said no they have been through this for centuries. I hope you guys see this lady has excuses for everything and blames everyone. No one can help you but you people are tired
And comments like this are hurtful and completely unnecessary. Don't watch if you that is how you feel.
I don’t agree at all, I feel like everyone has let her down and she deserves better.
Lique is an adult and has let herself down
She thrives off the attention and craves it. She suddenly goes into episodes of crying with absolutely no tears, and in a,second snaps out of it. It's all part of the drama she craves and needs to feed her addiction
You had the opportunity to get help and you fled. Anorexia has a severely adverse effect on the power to think rationally. It’s important that you acknowledge that the screen through which you evaluate yourself and the help others offer is distorted . You are seeing the world through distorted lenses which you believe is true.
Sorry, I sent that too early. If you accept you are not thinking clearly,then you can
I really hope you are given another opportunity to go to hospital to get the care you need. It was disappointing to see you had left the last one, despite their care not being perfect. Unfortunately no facility will have perfect care that meets all expectations, especially not with an eating disorder that will make up any excuse to avoid treatment and maintain control. If you are given another opportunity, I hope you will decide to stay and follow all treatment recommendations regardless of how uncomfortable and emotional it gets. Continue to work with your psychiatrist through it and be completely honest about what you’re going through. Your intestinal issues and diabetes will never improve unless the eating disorder is treated first. I would bet they will both go away once your body recovers from anorexia. That should be top priority and everything else second. Wishing you the best. 💓
Classic Manipulation. Stop having a Pity party like poor poor me. No one wants to help a Narcissist. Stop guilt tripping. And stop with the Crocodile tears. That won't work.
Shut up
I understand how hard it is and people don’t know what goes on in your head. Once you get back into a hospital you have to stay. No matter what happens. You have to give yourself that chance. Do whatever they ask of you and no matter how uncomfortable it gets you stay and trust the process. Because at least there you have support. Someone to make meals and do your laundry so you can rest. Rest and recover. I’m sending you all my love. Just hold on a little longer. You can do this. ❤
Yes… so true. I do think I may need this to finally let go TOTALLY 😔
Just praying I will find the strength to survive till than 🙏🏻
@@liquefaith have they given you an estimate on the amount of time it may take until you can be back at the hospital?
@@liquefaith one day at a time. One meal at a time. We’re all rooting for you. ♥️
Yeah, I really hope she will watch this back when she has doubts that the experts can help. She can't afford to keep going on without help. I remember she was so upset at staff that she was woken in the middle of the night to eat. Yet being low blood sugar could send her into a coma. I work in a hospital and had a patient who's blood sugar got too low, and he's still alive/mobile but has brain damage. She's playing with fire right now. I hope she gets the help and accepts the helps she needs the next opportunity it comes around again
@@briethompson439 That's such a sad story. Will that person fully recover or is the damage permanent?
I completely understand that primal need for love and care from your parents. I'm so very sorry they aren't giving you that. You would deserve it so much.
I started following your story from the beginning of this channel and was so hopeful for you and shared your fund page. Like many anorexics you have sabotaged yourself and made every excuse for you to remain in your disordered eating and thinking. You left the hospital on your own free will and now are wallowing over the fact you can't just get right back in as others who deserve to have a chance to recover as well have the bed now. It's hard not to feel swindled by a person who is revealing themselves as manipulative and only grasping for control, seemingly not recovery. It is impossible to not feel sad for you but it starts to seems suspect when it is lots of crying but no tears every video and the same excuses. Eat the food. Sit with the feelings. Grow. I am a recovered addict and know the struggle, but don't understand the narrative of poor me even though you were handed a chance to get better on a silver spoon.
I am seeing a pattern here also I haven’t watched since she was in hospital I came to catch up and see progress I cannot believe I just read in your comment that she left the hospital on her own free will. SMH!
Please be kind, harsh words do not help and can add to the stress, as a nurse I know eating disorders are extremely complex, so please support her sometimes people can’t get out of depressive place without long term therapy, families are very intrinsic and sometimes the parents can’t emotionally cope, nurturing by families can be healing, please don’t judge sending healing and hugs x
Sweet Angelique, never think that because we may comment how you seem well, that it means we’ve forgotten about your daily plight/that we don’t see your pain. ❤️ I’m so very sorry you’ve felt utterly alone and desperate 😢 How are you feeling, since uploading this?
I totally understand how it feels like the world is burning, and no matter what you do, you’re somehow always wrong/ignored. I’m so sorry you’re feeling this, it hurts so much I know. I’ve been trying (unsuccessfully) for the past week to get a hold of my doctor, just a call back, one call back… I’m feeling exasperated. Just damn tired. So many hugs going out to you, girl.
Don’t apologize for feeling down. This is your channel. You have every right to smile, laugh, cry, rant, anything you want. Living with a chronic illness is effin hard 😭 and it fluctuates on a whim, it really does. Once again, as you always do, you will rise and have a better day. Do whatever you want on your channel. Do whatever you want to help yourself through 🌻
I BELIEVE IN YOU!! *HUG*
Brandi 💜💜💜
You are right. For many situations there is no help. So many of us have experienced this. We just have to do it on our own or it won't happen..
So tRue bravo
That’s why though inspirational talks she give are a bunch of crap. She don’t follow her own advice
When I was anorexia many many many years ago my mother used tough love on me and told me my face looked skelitor and my body I cant look at you, , it worked as really I was not happy with myself but when i learned to love myself again and not worry what people thought of me I gained weight and kept eating and now I am a Old lady and much fatter and good with it. I dont know if this would help you. when I gained weight I then met my husband and had a beautiful son, although we are now divorced I am happy within. That beautiful picture of you with a more rounded face stunning please get back to that girl again we love you you are such a beautiful person. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
You should watch Ro Mitchell's youtube, she is absolutley a warrior in weight restoration and I think there is a LOT she could teach you!
It's interesting Lique, because in doing some research on ED and the Netherlands, they actually have some of the top rated facilities for ED in the world. I just kept thinking this is not a 3rd world country you live in, and found it shocking you claim there is no help. I'm glad you're atleast seeing a psychiatrist. Lique, I think it's time you realize it's your job to take care of yourself, not anyone else's. While clearly you need help, I never have once heard you take accountability for the condition you're in, or responsiblity for your recovery. Every road you turn is a dead end according to you. Its everyone else's fault. You're literally missing out on life, and I believe thriving off the negative attention, and sickness. Lastly, what is the medical term for your intestinal problems? I have asked multiple times with no response. You are vague and label it intestine problems, but never elaborate.
They have good facilities indeed. But no help for severe or longterm or complicated eds. They claim they do but in reality’s they dont. There are many articles in newspapers etc and even television programs that go to the bottom of this. I’d say: do more research…
I elaborate about my intestine issues in several videos. I had a perforation on my 6th. See other videos for more info if you are interested…
Bean, what Lique says is true. When you have a difficult care demand (which I also have) then they can't do much.
ED care here in the Netherlands has a one size fits all protocol, which doesn't work for 'complicated' patients. Sad but true
And that's why I NEVER EVER will return to an ED facility, because it only made my ED worse.
And then they gaslight you in those clinics by constantly quoting: 'is that you or your ED speaking?' when in fact your healthy self is talking and asking legitimate questions.
It's infuriating.
@@forestfairie51 and Emma got even help that isn’t available for others… I contacted the organization. Told them that if I would get that help I WILL survive… But is was only a ‘once’ offer 😥
@@marjol3in than no treatment is less bad than bad treatment indeed…
@@liquefaith Afschuwelijk is dat. Die mensen hebben geen hart. Het draait dus toch om het geld. Ik vind het een grote schande.
Mijn terugval in eetbuien (zonder overgeven) ga ik zonder hulp overwinnen. Dan krijg ik er tenminste geen nieuwe trauma's bij die gerelateerd zijn aan de nalatigheid van de psychiatrie.
Lique stop complaining for once. There's Help.
Lique I have what's called Hydrocephalus its a Hidden disorder. Its not treatable with meds. Yours is. So stop complaining. Yours Has meds you can take to treat it. Mine has non. My only option is Surgery. So until you've lived in my shoes for a Day stop complaining.
Shut up
@@catharineburke4494 well that's a extremely unhelpful comment, she could die from heart failure, regardless what medication she is on , you obviously don't understand Anorexia !
@@Debilee16 mine Doesn't have medicine I can take. She Does.
You may have addressed this already..if you have then I’m sorry for asking. Has your nutritionist thought about putting in TPN line so that you could be fed intravenously? Maybe your levels would remain stable that way? I’m so sorry that you’re going through all of this. I wish that you could move somewhere else to get the assistance that you need.
I didn’t battle as long nor as severe as an eating disorder as you but for me it did come down to a decision. I was sick and tired of it and made the decision I didn’t want it anymore and I would try as hard as possible to combat the anxiety that came with recovery. If I could do it over, I would have done it with anxiety medication bc I think it would have made it easier. I don’t think leaving the hospital was a good decision. It was uncomfortable there but you seem equally as uncomfortable now just in a different way. Eating disorders make it hard to see simple equations bc they cloud your mind with lies and anxiety. Maybe pointing it out though can help you in this moment. Your life relies on simple math and science. If you eat a certain amount of calories (which I hope you KNOW this number based on your hospital plan and weight gain target) and get the nutrients you need, you WILL recover. Plain and simple. If you do not get those calories in, you will not recover. Your mind is the only thing in the way. When you do not listen to the eating disorder you are going to have a LOT of anxiety and it’s going to be unpleasant but probably no more than slowly starving to death. When you feel this anxiety, you just have to know that it can torment you but logically if you stick to the math and the science there’s no way it can win. If you have to film every meal you eat (I’ve seen many recovered anorexics on youtube do this in their journey) and document your internal struggle- do it. Every ounce you gain, you need to celebrate it alongside people. A recovery anorexic channel is documenting the journey to recovery… in the details. If you say ok this is what I need to do today to get better- its this amount of meals, this amount of calories, and it’s going to be tough but I’m doing it all for everyone on camera, that’s accountability. I think if you allow your viewers into the details of your recovery, every second of it, you’ll find a lot of help and support in the moments you feel most alone. I would change your channel name to Lique’sRecovery. A lot of people actually do it on their own. You will find in life all you can count on sometimes is yourself. You don’t need anyone’s help. You can do it.
Thank you for stating the truth 🙏🏻❤️
Very,very well expressed. I agree about the accountability. The illness takes you on a path to self annihilation (been there myself).Ultimately, the only way out is to break everything down into achievable goals.One meal/snack/ drink at a time.
Lique,
I really agree with what Katie Beth said, for she has been through it& relates & understands your struggles on a different level
I’m sure we are only seeing a snippet & can’t grasp the enormity of your situation
But God…
Start with changing your page name& make it a declaration & be accountable
Sending love& prayers from USA
I pray that Your soul will prosper & you will be in good health. Amen
Absolutely true, every word, honest!
@@liquefaith no problem. To be clear, I’m still on your side and hoping you can pull through this to the other side. You are human and all humans make mistakes. But also, some people can afford to make mistakes more than others. A cab driver taking you to the wrong destination is not as big of a deal as a pilot making an error and crashing a plane. You’re the pilot Lique, just remember that when you are faced with a decision, really think it over like it’s life or death. Fight hard and make good, logical choices. Your survival will depend on it.
Dear, it is always good to see you. I keep hearing you say how to get help, but you had help. You were in the hospital - the best place for you. You wanted to get to that place so badly, you had it. You need to go back. It is the only way.
You said it : Stay focused . Stop the brain running !! STAY FOCUSED ON YOUR GOAL 💗
I wish you could have someone there to help you, maybe for every meal you could Livestream on UA-cam and we can help encourage you to eat all meals and finish everything and make sure you're eating enough?
You messed up your body so much. You have to listen and take the advice of professionals. It’s your fault. Live with it
I’m very saddened by this news. I had such high hopes for you this time Lique…
I am not giving up. Never ever.
See my last post…
@@liquefaith I’m glad to hear it. Because you deserve to live a long and healthy life, and above all a happy one. I will keep rooting for you from afar. May there be brighter days ahead yet! Wishing you all the best on this undeniably difficult journey ❤️
Parents should be there for you no matter what, if you was my daughter I’d wrap you in cotton wool and never let you out my sight, it’s shocking no one will help you love, keep hoping xxx
And that still wouldn't cure your daughter. Don't judge.
People also tried to help her, but she was always the one who walked away and was really just stubborn. At some point people are just done with it! And they also just want to continue with their own life to which they are entitled.
🙏🏻❤️
@@romanaabo3664 I wasn’t judging any one, and no matter what I’d never give up on my daughter or son, I’m sure she she has pushed every one away at some point, it’s a wicked illness,
@@micheldawnsummers1452 she didn't say her mom gave up on her.
It really all boils down to one thing.....do you want to live or die?
At the point I nearly died to this mental disease, I finally realised tje demon I was dealing with......death. I chose to live
I asked that question before
So much in recovery is about tolerating the emotions. I know you are working on this and I see some changes in your vulnerability, but I want to remind you that thinking about emotions is not the same as feeling them. Let yourself feel, it will be okay… if you allow it more regularly, it will stop being so scary and won’t hijack you so completely as often. Speaking from my own experience with recovery, as well as that of many other people I have seen recover over the past 20 years.
I adore you! I watch all of your videos!
No one else can fix you, you have to fix yourself! If you want it bad enough you will do it! You keep searching for place after place to help you but you won't help yourself.
I know it isn't easy but how bad do you want it?
Why aren't you on peripheral nutrition? Is that by choice?
I'm sorry, I know this is harsh.
Sending love and prayers your way.
Harsh, but true at times. I do what I can but my ed really gets in my way.
Hope to updat soon on changes I am making now 🙏🏻
You can do this! Your life isn’t over but you simply need to go through the pain that goes with your battle. I’m also going through a tough time but it’s via a Narcissist dad who has stripped me of my son’s relationship. I am doing my part to maintain my good character and not texting him except to say I love you. Know that anything that’s worth having is going to hurt in many cases.
We arent psychiatrists here. And she has many Drs and she refuses to let them help ? I think we need to cut her lose here as she will never heal if she keeps coming on youtube like this begging for donations.
Thank you for saying how f***** hard it is for you. It’s not as easy as making feel good videos but it’s what we need to keep you in our thoughts and prayers and think what can we do to help.
I won’t say I didn’t cry all the way through this video, but it’s because your pain, anxiety and desperation are palpable. Life is such crap so much of the times and even I have to remind myself not to say the negative possibilities out loud and it’s a cultural thing for me not to say them. Sending so much love and rays of hope your way. Love love love everything about you. ❤
A big hug for you! Is there a possibility, that you can focus on something completely different than eating, health etc.? Something quiet and calm. For example like writing a book for children , knitting, practising one of your foreign languages, meditating or going on excursions with your wheelchair? Please excuse, if these should be the wrong examples. Only you can say, what is possible.
It's just that I think it takes too much energy, if you are struggling so strong and desperately.
Maybe eating according to the clock and afterwards focussing on something completely different?
Especially slow and calm meditations might help, so that you won't need that much energy by being anxious etc..
Take all the help you can get. You are worth it! And keep in mind: I want to meet you one day!
🙏🏻❤️
Well Stop Moaning about it and just EAT LIKE I had to do over the past 33 years hun Xx
Wow.
You are right. Can’t say anything else.
@@liquefaith can you eat more snacks? What about a few slices of toast before bed? Do you have milk? Full fat milk, what about hot chocolate. Do you like pasta? What kinds of food are you having for your meals? Do you like takeaways? Please eat more as you don't want to loose any more weight.
Praying for you my Sister
Please don’t get upset with her. She’s sharing vulnerable information about herself.
I would love to be able to be there with you every day and encourage you to be well. You need so much talk therapy to get through this.
Please allow yourself to get well. The spirit inside of you needs to be reassured, you CAN do this.
Do not give in to this illness, YOU DESERVE LIFE. A great life.
This comment is everything ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Wish I could be with you daily as well. ❤🙏
People are upset, because they are worried. And that's a natural response.
@@marjol3in Of course I know it’s out of concern. From anorexia experience, any type of wording that displays that you are upset with them is another reason to fall back into behaviors. Not saying for all, just out of experience, it makes you feel more like a failure. It’s a very hard illness to help someone with because anything said can be triggering. I just meant, positive words like “be strong”, “you can do this”, “we want to see you heal”, are much more productive in recovery. But , yes, we are all worried and I understand.
@@jennifermichaels6481 Thank you for explaining.
I care about you Lique. I know you will live. I think some of the comments here are very harsh. Please don't let them get you down. XOXOX
Why did you leave hospital my love ??? Praying for you. 💛✨🙏✨💛
I thought I had listened to all of Lique's messages but I didn't know she had left hospital x
@@franperry5100 yes she did unfortunately and it saddened me xxx
One day at a time! This diabeties situation is very tricky. I trust that there's always a workaround, but also I wish you could finally see a way that is clear and simple. Thank you for being honest, both in the positive and the negative. Keep on doing what you can, there's no perfect decision. You're gonna screw up a little in the process, sometimes be very grateful, sometimes be very whiney, sometimes give it your 100%, and other times make excuses, as we all do. And while sharing this, there's always gonna be differing advices from people (looking at the conflicting comments here!). Some advice may save your life, some may set you back, and some of us are not here to tell you what to do, but rather to listen and cheer you on. It's all okay. Let's pray for eachother. See you next time!
That doesn't sound like very helpful medical advice. 😔 Any way you can get a microphone my friend? I turn it up to hear you, then the ads blow my ears off. Want to hear what you have to say!
So many comments...I'm sure mine will get lost. Lol
Some eating disorders are less about our relationship with food, and more about our relationship with people.
My personal story is one of grief, rejection and loss...followed by an inability to feel any hunger. I thought it would end but it's been 11 yrs now.
There is an archetypal "family table" and I no longer felt invited to it, nor deserving of it. It was a huge awakening to realize this.
But my realization was not my cure. My cure has begun in the slow steady building back of relationships in my life, making me feel human and invited once again. It has been very hard...hard also to let go of the image of myself as the outcast, as the damaged one.
You may not relate to this at all, but eating disorders are often, if not always, about much more than our "body image".
Love and Hope
Granny
Dear Granny, I DO relate! Thank you for sharing this… 💖
Hello dear Lique, this is so heartbreaking to hear, I really hope you can meet someone who lives nearby and who could help you but also be a company to you. I feel that you need a presence of a caring person. I've had a dream last night that I was choosing a warm jacket for you, it was located somewhere by the pool and you had so much fun with other people while I was doing that. A jacket can represent warmth in a dream. In the end, however, I picked up a dress and you loved it! So maybe you also need a bit of a spark in your life. 🙌🙌💜💜Wish only the best for you in the process of healing both, the body and soul.
💜
my mum said I cant look at you and that was my changing
Dear Lique
I think,who has not suffered with Anorexia,can really understand the situation you are in
Yes,it’s normal to look to our Parents for support
I asked my Mother many times ,for different reasons and she was never available emotionally
Hoping your Faith will guide you through
Warm,gentle Hugs 🤗
A good part about feeling angry is it can be incredibly motivating…use the anger to show people you are serious about recovery this time…gain some weight And prove you are serious..people will help you when they see you helping yourself…if it takes investigating foodplans that work or ordering supplements and getting things delivered…do that…do whatever it takes..you don’t get a second chance if anorexia takes your life and you are running out of time…no one sustains a low body weight indefinitely…don’t die waiting for others..your destiny is in your own hands…and lamenting whether that is fair or not won’t change anything..it’s the situation you are in..how you got there doesn’t matter but how you respond…will define you..the knowledge and wisdom you need is inside you…put it into action…it’s time to save your own life
🙏🏻❤️
I think it would be beneficial if you went back in hospital. Or a different one if you don’t like where you were. You can get better. I know how frustrating getting better can be. You deserve life sweetheart.
I don't know your background with your parents and brothers... but think about it in the other way... when they are old and need your help, would you say euuuhm... no??? It feels like they are really cold hearted. I would never give up on my children no matter in what situation they are.
This is so true!!! This is how I've started to look at life and my relationship with my mum. I wonder if her mum thinks well, she is 40, she has made her bed now she can lie in it. Some mums are like that.
Hello please stay strong and don't forget you have a lot of people here that absolutely 💖 you.... and are here for you to help you be strong and to get threw this hard Journey. I'm praying Dear friend 🙏 for you to have strength to stay on the strong side! ... always remember God won't let fall hangon to his strength ever time you won't to give in pop on your utube where you are loved ❤ ..Much love from me Lee Sydney Australia 🇦🇺 sending you sunflowers to cheer you up 🌻🌻🌻🌻
Thank you dear… 🙏🏻❤️
The anxiety with recovery is absolutely terrifying, its so nerve-wracking letting go and beyond nightmarish but you have to push through to get to the other side, we are here for you and I wish to see you recover so badly 💕💟
💜
Why won’t parents step up?? Have they stepped up so many times and now they are done? Must be very hard for them to watch you decline. I still feel you can beat this. Dig deep for the will power. I’m sure you know exactly what you need to do. It’s doing it that’s the struggle. I really can’t imagine your pain and suffering but I see a power in you, a gift, a future of helping others!
Also, let's not forget, Angelique is in her 40's, making her parents most likely of senior citizen/retirement age: 60's to 70's). This is usually a time in life when roles are reversed and children often take care of their parents. Who knows what their position in life is right now, or if they are even capable of supporting her mentally, physically, or financially? She has mentioned in past videos their relationships are strained.
Imagine how tired they must be after 20 years of trying… She also left the hospital again… It seems like she is complaining but the problem is never her. Thats the source of the problem. Before she understands that, there is no healing…
Oh Ang, I know exactly how you feel. It's inhuman and impossible to be positive EVERY SECOND OF EVERY DAY, even for us believers in and followers of Jesus Christ. My prayers for strength, increased faith and perseverance go out to the Lord for you! 💖 🫂 Bear hugs 🫂
Thank you so much dear… 💜💜🙏🏻
Hello precious Lique 💖.Please hold on.Yes,I can see how desperate and tortured you are.I know you are trying...really trying. It's so very, very hard; on your mind & your body.On top of that,the medicos seem to be almost useless.. I want to reach through the phone and hold/ hug you 🥺.And then to be rejected ( for whatever reasons)by your family. It's just all tooo much Lique 🥺.
All I can offer is my love and encouragement. Please ,please ,just keep breathing...keep trying.
You are loved,you are worth it 💖💞💞💞
Thank you Catherine… 🙏🏻❤️
I agree with some people on here. You had earlier said your family was all dead. Now you're saying you asked your parents for help and they said no. Which is it? You seem to have excuse after excuse to help yourself.
Dead? Never said that… they aren’t available due to their own problems. I never stated otherwise 🙄
I know they can’t help me. I had to be there for them all my life to help them survive. But it has been always a struggle to live that way. Since my own needs couldnt be met. And now I am do in need myself I kept hoping that it somehow may be enough to turn things around. Unrealistic. I know. But the wish is often the father of the thought 😳
@@liquefaith omg I'm so sorry. I got you confused with someone else. Please accept my apology and I am so sorry your family cannot help you.
What exactly do you expect from a treatment program for you?
Get me through refeeding, help me stick to a good foodplan, get my bloodsugars stable, gain weight, stabilize physically and mentally, gain strength… but this may be too much to ask/expect 😳🙄
Is there any support groups in your area or online that you can join? Maybe you can get some help from them until you are able to be hospitalized again? I'm sorry you are going through this, please try to stay strong. I know you feel alone but you are not alone.
There are plenty of resources in the Netherlands. But if you just walk away every time and stop the treatment, then it's done and someone else will receive that treatment. She was given so many chances but she threw them away herself. At some point it's just really done!
I know it's hard, I mean I don't know what you're going through because I don't understand it. But we all have a cross to bear. Some days are just way harder than others. But you have God in your life and that's amazing. I said a prayer for you tonight, and I asked God to please help you get better. I have a husband two children six sisters and a brother. Whom all I love very much and they love me. But they don't live in the town I live in, and even though I'm married my husband is deaf so it's hard to have any kind of conversations with him. My brother-in-law also lives with us and he's also deaf and kind of lives his own life anyway. So I know that feeling of being alone I don't really have anybody to just hang out with laptop go to dinner anything. I'll be married 50 years in June. I have a daughter that lives close by but she's so busy she's an attorney and a professor of law. So every weekend just about she's gone. So I am lonely even with people in my life. I will continue to pray for you, and know that people are thinking about you. You can beat this I know you can. And when you get better, you can come visit me in the US, and we can hang out and laugh. Hugs
O dear… you have your fair share of challenges so to hear! Am with you in thoughts and prayers too. Remember (like I remind myself too) that even though we don’t always FEEL it, we are NEVER alone…
Big hug to you dear! ❤️
Thank you for your honesty. Given your diabetes, chocolate and high-sugar processed foods may not be the answer for you (although they would help you to increase your BMI). It is complicated, and I don’t pretend to know the answer. It is also difficult for you to cook from scratch, because that takes a lot of energy, which you don’t have right now.
It is a shame you left the hospital, because there your meals are prepared for you, and are cleaned up afterwards. And they can keep a close eye on your blood sugar, and BMI.
Yes… you are right…
I really hope I learned my lesson.
Hope to stay alive till my bed and SURRENDER…
I don’t understand your parents. Maybe I just don’t get the situation because I haven’t heard you explain it but it makes me so sad that parents could ever see this and not help. You are in my prayers and I’ll pray that your parents find peace too.
Lique, I have the same problem with my blood glucose. I was told it would improve if I were to put on weight. I don’t know whether that’s true, of course my ED wants to believe that is not the case although it does make sense. I wanted to share because I think sometimes our EDs want to make excuses and it’s hard to trust that if we could get to a healthier weight some of these problems might improve by them self. Take care
Thanks for sharing this… 👍🏻😘
Sending love and hard punches Champ 🥊🏆
Love that 👍🏻😅🙏🏻🥰
Yes you are a beautiful person hang in there love you from Georgia hugs and love from me to you prayers 🙏 ❤️ 🙏❤️🙏❤️🙏
Thank you Marcella 🙏🏻❤️
Lique, my diabetes journey was similar to yours. I started with hypoglycemia for years. Now it goes up and down and I have seizures. I had my first seizure when I was 54 years old. It’s crazy. If you keep protein with you and eat small amounts throughout the day, it levels out the sugars. I also had anorexia for decades. Now I have so many health problems. I have gastroparesis, which is why I asked about the feeding tube. But I don’t want one unless it becomes necessary. Since I can’t digest well, I have to be careful with what I eat or face severe consequences. Yogurt has protein, I often have protein bars, and protein shakes. They’re easier to digest than meats. You’re not alone!! We’re here! I wish I could reach through the screen and hug you! Try to live one moment at a time. Count each moment as a win. I feel as though your expectations for yourself are too high. Not that high expectations aren’t great, but sometimes they aren’t realistic. Do you have a hobby you can easily do? You can count little things as accomplishments. Right now, I have to count being able to change clothes an accomplishment. If I can stand for longer than three minutes, it’s an accomplishment. If I can get into my wheelchair by myself and wheel into the living room, it’s a huge accomplishment. I know you’re making strides. God only expects you to do your best. I know it’s cliché, but it’s true. I don’t know if your country legalized medical marijuana, but I started taking it a couple years ago. It calms pain, treats nausea, and helps you feel calm and sleep better. I take it in gummies. I hope you feel peace. You’re in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you so much for sharing this… big hug to you too sweetheart ❤️❤️
Sweetheart, I think we all try to stay so positive in order to encourage you, but you are right. There are always two sides to the coin, and all of us who struggle with living in any way go through the same highs and lows. The lows are so difficult to get through, but one technique I have started to try is when I do start to panic and think of all of the challenges that I truly don't believe I am strong enough to get through, I start by meditating to calm myself to the point that I can disengage my emotional reaction long enough to just observe what is happening and see if there is anything I can learn from the situation. I think of it as disengaging my ego from my soul, if that makes sense. I believe the body is a vehicle we use while we are here, and for some of us, trying to live in this physical world with (in my case) a vehicle that I hate IS the challenge. I'm just going to come out and say it: I can't wait to go back home. But while I'm here, I hope to try and connect with other souls to offer a reminder that they are loved, even by those who they will never meet, just because we are all truly connected by God/Source/etc. I pray that you feel the love and blessings that we send, and are comforted even a little bit. That won't help you physically, I know. Nobody can overcome our struggles for us. I've totally failed this life (with the exception of my daughter), and some days the shame and guilt are overwhelming. Disengaging my ego from my soul has been the one thing that restores a sense of peace and allows me to continue. I don't know if that will work for you or anyone else that might read this, but it's the message I wanted to share today. God bless ALL of us as we make our way along our journeys. 🙏🙏💕💕
I don't think you have failed in life at all. You seem a very kind, genuine person. And that makes you a succes in life. ❤
Beautiful lady.....this is not about you this unhelpful situ.....the world ...needs to care more....we need more love.....just keep doing what you are doing....because you are high lighting this issue of most importance......
Thank you Jackie… 💜
Just breath.....try to be calm.....when you are write down places you could possibly move to where kind volunteers could help you. Put this out there...really you need to find your network.....your family don't want to do it.....they might be doing tough love but that isn't the answer always......I believe you can get a bit better you could meet a kind sweet partner who would love and care for you ....and you would give love back imsure
There’s no god when you have children dying of starvation and then some woman crying on UA-cam killing herself because of her own mental little problems with food right on front of her face complaining about how people are not fixing her problem. Complaining about all the problems and pain that you gave to yourself all in the name of “I don’t want to be fat”. Crazy world we live in.
Please speak up as I can hardly hear you hun Xxx
Ear buds
Catholic Social Services will help you ! Please research them ! Prayers for you tonight.
✨💛💞.. keep your faith and chin up through this very hard struggle. Sending you with much love and prayers 🙏
Thank you Karina 🙏🏻❤️
Lique in you previous video I explained how my blood sugar in the refeeding process went up and down. I'm sorry that it's been such a struggle for you. I praying for you and that a spot open up. Please believe and love yourself enough to keep up with the food plan the best you can. Big hugs🤗🤗
Mooie serie heb je gemaakt Angelique. Toch hoop ik dat je de serie met een positieve afloop een keer kan stoppen en dat je aan een ander hoofdstuk kan beginnen. Cheerleaden zoals Madelon gaat het niet worden voor me, geloof me dat wil je niet, maar laten we het maar houden op sending good vibes. Hopelijk heb je daar ook iets aan.
Watching you desperate, in emotional pain and panic, and crying...makes me wish I could reach through my phone and help you...save you. Then, it hits me, I can't. Only you can do this. Please don't give up. Just keep trying and don't think too far ahead. Sending you love and hugs from the USA.💕🙏😘
🙏🏻💜
For everyone in the comments section who thinks this lady in the video is just crying and asking for money for no reason. First of all you all don't know her situation and second you don't know what she is actually going through. She only shows what she is comfortable showing us all. And for everyone in the comments section putting her down and saying she should do this or she should do that. That is wrong and that is judging her when you say she is only crying and asking for money or wanting attention. You don't know her full story and you don't really know what she is going through. So lay off of her she is already fighting a major battle being sick. And she does not need that. This is the last thing she needs for people in the comments section attacking her and making assumptions about her and her situation. To many people now days are to quick to judge people on appearance or there situation. And it has to stop and it has to stop right now before it is to late. There is only one judge and that judge is God. Not all of you in the comments section who make fun of this beautiful little lady and put her down for making a video telling us all her story. So if you don't like her or don't want to hear what she has to say about her story and her journey in life. Then just leave click off the video or just unsubscribe to her youtube channel. No one is holding you back from leaving her channel. But for everyone who is going along with her on her journey through this stuff she is going through. I just got one thing to say to you all who stay and support her. And that one thing I got to say is. Thank you thank you for staying and being her friend and subscribing to her youtube channel. I really appreciate it and I am sure she really appreciates it to.
Thank You.
You judge people by calling them losers. So you are doing the same.
@@marjol3in agree. And honestly I don't think people are judging her at all as a person - she seems wonderful. I think we all finding ourselves trying to understand the situation. She made a UA-cam channel for people to follow her journey and she always encourages subscribers to comment. She also goes as far as asking for people's recommendations and opinions. I absolutely do not judge Angelique - I just see a situation that is unfortunately being poorly managed. 🙏
@@leanneeggenberger9127 amen
I was losing lots of weight and it wouldn't stop and I wasn't trying to lose weight. I got down to 97 or lower. I went to so many doctors and they did every test. Finally one doctor found that I was severe anemic. He gave me folic acid and iron. I slowly gained my weight back. I vitamins can help you. Omega 3 is good too. I'm sorry you lost weight. Ask your doctor to check if you have anemia and ask for folic acid and iron supplements.
Because I know all about what your going through I didn’t think you were doing great. I thought you looked a bit thinner. Unfortunately, The only person that can get us better is Ourselves. It’s so hard I know. I’m still struggling as well. But we have to just DO IT. I have been told it will get worse before it gets better. I’m really feeling your pain. You are loved Lique.😂
Thank you for sharing this dear… 🙏🏻❤️
Hello Little Sister, Are you eating well? What are your favorite foods? Are you allowed to have them? Please tell me you're still fighting the good fight. Remember your guardian angel is with you. Satan WILL be defeated. I claim it it Jesus' Holy Name. Amen
i think you would really benefit of spending time with animals. a snuggly cat or an older dog. It might give you some light and easy your anxiety. There's a reason why there are so often animal visits in mental health clinics and therapy, especially for children.
Maybe you have a friend that has an animal that you can at least pet and snuggle a bit?
I do, but not here. Animals are indeed so healing! Miss them here too
Hi Angelique I am someone who experiences bulimia and binge eating and have been for about 27 years. In the UK I have been on the waiting list for outpatient treatment now for year and a half and no confirmed date in site. Throughout my whole adult life I was always heavily overweight and was disgusted with myself. 2 years ago I lost all the weight and told myself I would rather die than be “fat” again. Yet today I am 28 pounds overweight and again feel ashamed and disgusted with myself. All thanks to the eating disorder. I wanted my whole life someone or something to come and save me and relieve me of this pain. I felt I deserved it finally after all the trauma I’ve been through. The other day as scale went up again I had a realisation that no amount of people, treatment, resources, help, money or anything else will save me. For me personally, realisation is this: the answer is within ME, true healing and purpose and connection is within me. My true Self is awaiting to emerge and I can’t wait to meet her! I am now 7 days binge and purge free and have to work through every moment of day to day life to do the next right thing. It is so much harder than simply bulimia cycle but so much rewarding and freeing. I now know that I will have to do all the work today and always. And finally, I believe with all of my heart and soul that I will heal from this and learn how to process life without an eating disorder. I believe that complete healing for me is possibly even though I’ve had ED my whole adult life. I have a loving partner - he can’t save me, I have an amazing child - his love can’t save me. My mother is very supportive - she can’t save me. Absolutely nothing and no one can! The answer is within me- it always was I just couldn’t see it… 🙏💖💫
You seem such a strong and dedicated person. Good luck on your recovery journey. I'm a former bulimic myself, but still struggling.
@@marjol3in oh my gosh thank you so much for your kind words… I was thinking about starting my own YT channel to share my journey but not sure yet.. I wish you so many blessings on your own journey.. we can do this!! 🤗🙏💖
I feel that you can really encourage people to heal their eating disorder!
@@bernadettemcmaster4560 thank you so much! I appreciate you taking time to respond x 🙏💖
@@KlaudijaGreen I would like to follow your journey.
Her family is tired of her