My Husband Doesn't Like Me Getting Out Of Debt
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- Опубліковано 13 сер 2021
- My Husband Doesn't Like Me Getting Out Of Debt
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I just paid off my home yesterday!!!!! Debt FREE!
Congrats!
I remember that feeling from when I managed that. Doing the happy dance for you!
You deserve this. CONGRATS!!!
Congrats
Good to hear bro
Calls like this makes more people living life on their own. I can’t imagine being legally tied to a person who is pro spending and pro debt.
I feel like a lot of people get married before figuring out where their would-be spouse is on money.
That's why you get on the same page BEFORE you get married. It's not difficult
Well there is always an option of getting all this figured out before marriage.
@@edb484 50% off all marriage doesn't end in divorce. That's a big lie from the media.
@@imout671 Actually the marriage rate is declining and people are waiting longer to have kids.
This is Why I advocate for everyone to be debt free while single.
This is great idea...the second issue is finding someone who shares your financial habits
@@KahaHajiMohamed Easier said than done. People in general like to spend.
Good advice
@@filb yeah they should spend on their loans.
Ya but she is 50 lol, it's been a long time since she was young or single.
Don't do it! He sits at home and is limited by his income. Once he has access to your money, he will spend it all.
They are married.
It’s been done already.
On another woman while she is on the road.
If that's a legit fear it either needs to be worked through or they have to divorce right away. Dave strongly feels they can get on the same page. But you can't be separate people in some ways and still remain married.
Another story where the spouse that makes the money wants to get out of debt ans spend less, but the spouse that doesn't is skeptical of living on less.
Yep! Easy to spend money frivolously when you’re not the one putting in all the hard work to bring home the bacon 🥓
@@Coco-qw9gq Yep. That was my mom to a t. She hated holding down a job and misused the child support my father sent her to us since she didn't have to pay for the house we live d in (my dad did). With her second husband she claimed she was fired (though I think she quit) from her job after they were only married a couple of months and she always complained to me about how he was so stingy with money and not letting her spending it frivolously. I (only about 25 at the time) told her to get a job at least part time and spend her own money! Needless to say they divorced after less than a year of marriage.
SAVAGE use of the mute button!!
“Get rekt son” - Dave Ramsey
The enemy here is not marriage. The issue is far too many people, myself included, don't have these types of important conversations before getting married. All that on top of the her money/his money dynamic is just a recipe for financial disconnection and possibly trouble.
Yeah you are right
it sounds like their finances changed when their situation changed. don't assume that they didn't discuss their 10-year plan because it obviously changed.
@@jones2277
The vows were supposed to be the lifetime plan.
At least you’re being honest but I honestly had this and other life changing discussions with my now husband soon to be ex husband and as soon as we had children his whole attitude changed and he didn’t keep his end of the bargain...so I rather struggle as a single mom then to struggle as a married mom with the added stress of having a grown child (husband) who refuses to stick with our financial goals and get out of debt not keep creating it
@@Coco-qw9gqSo you’d rather deprive your kids of their dad than work through the hard crap with your spouse. Even the stuff he goes back on. I’m sure you’ve done the same.
I just became debt free yesterday.
Congratulations!
@@MoonMoon-fx1op ty
Congratulations
@@tanyapinnock2347 ty
just because a couple had a wedding does not mean they have a marriage
I suspect there is more going on behind doors than just the money....
Always is.
$20K in CC debt: How, Why, name(s) on the accounts
~$5K/mo take home combined
Why can't make headway without his willingness?
encouraging her to put her money in a shared account with a spender is terrible advice. that is just asking for more debt.
Amen been there done that and had to put the criminal under control. They go mad dog demonic when you shut it down.
Yep, spender will spend all of your money then nothing left in savings.
@@tomstulc9143 LOL voice of experience. My ex really pushed back when I told him the Bank of Lynne was closed.
No it is not. By eliminating all other accounts and sharing one it keeps both people accountable to each other and they are able to see and question their spending. With separate accounts you can't see what the other is doing. When they are doing finances separate they are still raising debt outside of the others knowledge
@@alrbredwall then you just sit around and bicker over money all the time instead of just enjoying each other. being part of a marriage shouldn't mean you lose all sense of identity and autonomy. you can have shared goals and interests as a family and then personal goals or interests. that is why individual accounts and a shared account for family expenses is the way to go. once those bills are paid and savings are invested, then the money left over should be spent each person wants. no woman wants to be calling her husband at work to have money to buy tampons.
Name even ONE disadvantage of being debt free.
I'd say it's realitive to age and risk tolerance. Obviously consumer debt is a big no. But if you have a home with debt, and pay it off early to forego investing when you're young the opportunity cost is pretty great. But as you get older it starts to balance out more. Outside of a mortgage the risk is a bit to high for my personal taste
@@proborderlandsgamer debt free besides a mortage....goodness...
being kicked out of the DR club?? haha jk jk
@@proborderlandsgamer You do not forgo investing to pay off your house. You always, always, always put min. of 15% of your income into retirement to enjoy the advantages of compound interest. When you pay your house of ( sooner the better) you will have even more to invest, enjoy and give.
I am debt free and this is my choice, HOWEVER, one disadvantage is that my income only allows me to purchase so much with cash. My neighbors are enjoying many more things because they are on payments. If MORE matters, being debt free affords less. I still choose this for my peace of mind, security, and to follow Gods word about debt.
I'm selling my house in Massachusetts and moving to Texas! I bought a smaller house with land outright! I'm moving next month and I'm officially mortgage free!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!😁
Dave’s mute game strong.
😅
If there was something more Dave needed to know, the caller should have prepared her presentation a little better, such as bullet points, and kept it short. Don't understand why callers don't realize they have limited time and ramble on.
It doesnt reallly matter in the end if you keep your money together or separate. If your not on the same page then your not on the same page. Period.
That’s a codependent relationship. He doesn’t want her to become debt free because that stressor keeps distracting from them focusing on the bigger issue. Once the debt is cleared, the fog will clear. It seems husband is dependent on her in more ways than one. I hope he gets therapy, being a widower is no joke.
"Let's pull up here" no pun intended dave 🤣🤣
Wow, if she’s only making 850 per week as a team driver then her company is royally screwing her over. Find another company ASAP! People may say that’s not easy to do , not for trucking, the entire industry is starving for good people.
That's her take home. Insurance and taxes are killers.
@@bkay1535 - They are for sure but that is still too low. My husband is a solo contract driver and when he is running good after all expenses are paid he brings in more than twice that.
It was her choice.
Company didn’t force her to do anything.
Even with insurance and taxes she should be making twice that.
Yeeeeaaaahhhhhhh, that is really low. I helped my sister with her budget for the first time. She and her husband are team drivers and make a devil of a lot more than this woman.
I'm kinda regretting my decision to get a masters degree in education when my sister's six weeks of driving school netted her an income triple my teacher salary.
This wife is going to be forced to divorce him under the circumstances even if she doesn't want to that's what I see he will be in assisted living or a nursing home or dead sad
Well there goes the sickness and health part of the vows.
No waiting for death here.
@@blackworldtraveler3711 that’s old times language. It’s just words
@@williamerazo3921
You mean lies before inevitable divorce.
Lying never age.
Marriage and divorce just gets more expensive to broke people and lucrative to lawyers,courts,etc..
What kind of a financial arrangement/marriage is this 🙄🙄
Great Job Ramsey👏👏👏 this is actually my best post so far!
I'm thinking there is a reason why this lady has separate bank accounts. Combining their finances won't change the husband's financial habits; it would more likely just enable him to spend more. If husband had any sense he'd put ego away and make sound financial decisions like dump the bike he can't use and do whatever it takes to get rid of debt, given age and inability to work.
Sell the husband
*If this was my husband, his unwillingness to work towards becoming debt free would be a deal breaker for me*
Step one: big life insurance. Step two: make it look like an accident
Miriam, You are, intentionally or not, sending the message that "it's [your] way or the highway." I wouldn't want to be married to you nor would I want anyone else to marry you with this stance. You are never going to be happy in a relationship unless you can change the "me, I, mine" perspective into a "we, us, our" point of view. A strong marriage is NOT 50/50. It is 100/100...when things are going right. Very often one partner or the other is going to have to shoulder more than his/her share of the load because people will need support from time to time. Sometimes he will be the weak one and you will need to be strong. Sometimes you will be weak and need him to be strong...you know, human being stuff. If you go into a relationship pre-loaded with "if this happens, I'm out" scenarios then you were never all-in in the marriage.
We're they on the same page when they married? If she married him as a spender, it is unfair to make him the enemy when she changed. If he was on board and changed, he is at fault and they need counseling and shared commitments ASAP. Based on their decision to keep finances separate, I doubt they were committed to the Ramsey plan when they got married.
@@UnderDog1911 Miriam is probably the kind of girl who looks for a ‘dealbreaker’ in order to swing to the next branch
@@UnderDog1911 Robert, I agree. People throw deal-breaker and divorce around too casually. Once you're married, you need to stick it out a little. Don't let them spend you into bankruptcy, but get help before it comes to that. Counseling.
My God, people. Ok, NO ONE gets a marriage license until they take a Ramsey course and are in agreement. From now on and forever and ever Amen.
Completely agree. Seems extreme but would save so much heartache and broken homes
A license?
Financially ruined because of woman saying “I’m not happy”.
No thanks.
What happened to freedom ?
Sheep.
LOVE THIS!!!
Divorce, then Netflix and chill when you’re home. He’s going to keep you in debt and all your work will be for nothing.
Agree with the second sentence. This will be a life long battle. All your hard earned money will be for nothing.
Yup
I did this. It is wonderful.
@@donnaryan3162 you are strong . Very happy for you.
@@cjlive5182 All the work I put into fixing the problem is no longer my problem. The quiet is good, the calm is good, my sleep it so good. I no longer have a constant throbbing stress internally that my body carried for years. I guess I am lucky.
I enjoy listening to Christy´s advice. She is down to earth.
She's the best Ramsey personality by a long shot.
She is really angry at her husband....just leave
I was struck by how similar this is to many other calls, but with the genders reversed. It turns out that Dave's tendency isn't to side with the woman but with the free-spending-not-earning-spouse.
Maybe it’s time to find a new husband?
Disagree. Separate accounts. Do not pay his bills.!
She needs to be home get a job at home get him a job they he can do whether it’s call center job or whatever a sit down job get this paid off fix the broken marriage
Same relationship with citizens and politicians. We want out of this debt and they keep spending and coaxing us to get in more debt.
Get a divorce. You two are not "married" in any sense.
Or fix the marriage. You don't just get divorced so casually otherwise maybe don't get married.
one of these days someone's gonna flip the script on Dave and say this is actually what I do to my husband, lets see if he changes the answer.
Joint accounts are not for people are different pages
I hate how he mutes the caller and goes off on a rant and everything ends in ill send you out a book, its getting predictable
So what happened to Anthony?
There’s no way this lady is going to combine accounts with her husband.
Except good Debit.. yess but Bad Debit.. that’s a no Sis! Looks like I need to have a convo w/ my brother in-law 🤣🤣😂
Let's cut you off the line cause you try get word in after they start taking baha always gotta love that 🤣🤣
Love how Dave just mutes people when he's done listening to them. NOPE, YOU ARE DONE!
You never get the amount you think you are going to get from social security disability. In most cases it's not worth the effort and aggravation.
Married that long with separate accounts…..
This man is not pulling his weight _AT ALL_ , she *should* divorce him.
Funny Navy Federal's logo and card colors are mostly used in the graphics. I don't usually see many other versions used.
Wow Sadly
💲💰💲 I know it's hard to pay down debt especially when a spouse may not be as supportive. But *65 million Americans have done it and are debt-free today.* Thank you for you work helping others living the dream of becoming debt free. TY.
Then divorce anyway for other reasons.
Dave “if you talk over me will mute you back in your place in a blink of an eye” Ramsay.
I don’t understand the reaction. I had a loy of arguments and when I told my wife that we should go out of debt and that I thought it should be a priority it took her 3 seconds to get on board, no argument needed becaise it’s what’s best for our family. We sold our cars and bought each a $6000 low profile vehicule
This is not a marriage. She is a sometimes room-mate.
Then you better get out of that relationship then
Well reading through the lines, He might want her focus to be less on working , which is paying the debt, and more on him since he is sounding like he is unable to do much. I think she is drawing a conclusion on the wrong thing just due to likely what a different motivation. He has old debts too so bad habits from a bad situation
@L Cam Becoming Bitter is choice
These people are HORRIBLE with money. They will never own their own life.
???
My wife got sick and went to the hospital (did not accept ANY insurance as IN network)
80/20 became 60/40 and no negotiated discount.
BCBS paid $55K, leaving a $35K balance.
She has been paying his left over medical debt of former wife.
Lady you need to find a better company. Their are better company's who will pay you a lot better.
Wow a lot of debt
Geez. His and my accounts. Are they roommates or are they married!?
Crying out on the phone with relations ship issues Bah
You're the bread winner now woman!
Would love to hear what the disabled man thinks of this issue?
When will this show revolve around finances like it used to?
Push the wheel chair over the hill and move on
Do you really think that finances are not affected by a marriage relationship?! These are clips of the show and the video titles give an idea of what it's about, so you probably shouldn't have clicked on it.
@@lafawnthompson3952 I didn’t say that at all. I’m saying before she found 30 days ago they both were possibly on the same page… they both had this debt together. She’s now on the road with her brother not her husband. It’s not that they once didn’t share the same views
@@666dynomax lol
One more bill to go...
No common goal is the issue here. She's holding the bag....poor woman. But she's right in there as she decided.
Great English and grammar in this comment section!
marriage is not what it used to be nowdays. many divorce due to financial reasons
They're old, in terrible shape, barely working, low incomes, in debt... ugh, rough. I can't hardly breathe even listening to it. How sad.
Thought you were a financial adviser.
" she died from medical issues"... ya dont say
Many get married so young that there's no point in discussing money for a while since there's none of it.
Divorce
Duuuuuuvvallllllllll!
At 75 he gonna be six feet under.
Nothing wrong with separate accounts as long as you work as a team. But sounds like they are not at all.
Deadazz schools should be teaching us this stuff not how to get in debt smh. Thanks for the free class.
Deadazz? What's that?
Nah, this starts at home..a stable, safe, secure home. Never leave the important lessons to some stranger.
I always wondered if Dave supports centralized banking. The whole purpose of the central banks is to keep people in debt. His whole business is about getting people out of debt. Makes you go hmmmm
yes you are right how ever you can txt +1
four zero seven four nine four four two five six
they repa!r cred!t and remove hard inquires
Maybe it would be good for her to get a different job she can be home every night.
Maybe in the future he can work part time
I think the disability and SSA decides on how much he works if at all.
Why are you paying more than him get rid of motorcycle you spit the bills he pays for his wife sell the truck ....you are married you need to sit down and talk he talk and then you talk ....
Had a buddy making $300K/yr, his wife $60K
He had her split costs down the middle. It was oppressive
She got pregnant, and divorced him.
Served him right.
That’s terrible pay i make way more then that home every day
After all taxes and deductions? That's really not bad.
@@sblijheid terrible for being otr for months at a time
I agree, I hate driving, that's one job I couldn't/ wouldn't do . She's a straight up hero in my books..we need truck drivers. Im glad I work from home, I used to have to do a 15 minute drive and I thought that was too long lol.
“She died of medical issues”
I like how they just blatantly hijacked this woman’s problem, muted the call, and turned in into their own private topic of discussion.
I watch quite a few of their YT videos and if any debate to their baby step process being the all mighty, that happens.
they always do that.
Cardano is going to make me a millionaire this year. Any eth tards disagree? Lol
I own both, don’t be a hater
😎✌👌🖖👍😁
First!
Yeah
That advice was garbage. I would never merge my accts w/that bozo. Wife is paying off dead wives debts. No ma'am.
Love to hear his side. Men stay single please.
lol you're acting like an old disabled spender who is heavily in debt is a prize.
@@jones2277 only one side heard. I'm surprised she stuck by him most wouldn't.
Maybe learn a real skill dave!?
They need Dr. Phil
You need Dr. Phil of why you keep spamming!
@@appleforever6664 - Good one Apple Forever!
Casey the Spammer needs Dr. Phil!
In another episode of "When a non-millionaire low NW individual with no credibility gives advice"
@@tigerak02 - Nice one!! Keep up the fight against Casey the Spammer!
Note to Dave Ramsey Staff: "Y'all" has not been a real word ever since the South lost the Civil War. :-)
Y'all is wrong as two left shoes!
Lighten up. It is a good word.
Meh, it’s fine. English doesn’t have any other way to express second person plural…people wouldn’t use it if there weren’t a need for it.
How about "The both of you", or "You two"? We won't even get into making it a possessive as in "Y'all's".