Do We Need to Frame Dads as Heroes?
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- Опубліковано 4 жов 2024
- It's episode 237 of the Bare Marriage podcast!
Every Father’s Day, there’s a rallying cry in many conservative evangelical spaces that men are losing out and fathers are under attack. Where’s the truth in this? And what are the problems with talking about marriage like this? Plus we rewrite Harrison Butker’s commencement speech!
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THINGS MENTIONED IN THE PODCAST:
Focus on the Family Broadcast, Finding the Hero in Your Husband (Part 1) www.focusonthe...
Harrison Butker Speech and Transcript
• Harrison Butker | Comm...
www.today.com/...
Our Bare Marriage podcast on the idea that women talk too much (put forward by Focus on the Family under James Dobson):
baremarriage.c...
My post from last Father’s Day about framing your husband as the hero: / pfbid02qqiygnrcv1ategw...
Reminds me of when I saw Matt Walsh encouraging his followers to brutally mock a video of a house husband because he was supposed to get his lazy butt out of the kitchen and do "real work". That's when it hit me that for all their goopy talk, men like this don't really respect the "traditional" women the way they say they do.
EXACTLY!!! Thank you! So many husbands have 0 respect for that task. It’s really disgusting. If they really valued it, they would take on an equal role once they returned for their office job of 8h. You can’t blame women to choose the office job which is done after 8h vs the 24/7 job of serving her husband. Eyeyey, have husbands not learned that if only they are being served by their spouse, they are doing it wrong.
If you feel disempowered by the empowerment of someone else; you are the problem.
I think it’s important for dads to provide spiritual input for their children, not just leave it up to their wives. Wives should feel empowered to also give spiritual input for the family and not wait around for the dad to step up if he is not inclined to lead spiritually. Really, it’s important and ideal for children to see both of their parents caring about God and His word and ways.
Yes, it’s important for both parents to. But, a mother/wife is able to lead just as much as a man- not ONLY if a man doesn’t “step up”. It’s a complementarian concept that is not biblical. It just keeps men in control. Mutual submission is biblical. Mutual leading is biblical. Men are not to be in authority over their wife. There is no hierarchy. The gothard umbrella is not biblical.
Good morning, I’m so glad you’re back! ❤😊
I feel more secure as a single woman than I ever did in my 17 year marriage. I never felt like I had a partner and that IS what I hoped would happen but never did. 😢
Love your point about if homemaking is so great, why don't men agree to do it while their wives use their God-given talents to achieve outside the home? Over-emphasizing choice scriptures to put women on a pedestal and keep them in the home for their "protection" really is a con job that people of most faiths have completely bought into.
And I agree that telling kids their dad is a hero when he's a total flake is major gaslighting. Kids will see through it eventually and resent both the dad AND mom. Besides, kids automatically think their dads are heroes even if they're just average! This "must regard dad as a hero" business reminds of giving out blanket participation trophies. They don't mean anything! Great show. Rebecca you are so funny and I enjoy your gently sarcastic quick wit. You could do stand-up!
"Oh God! If there be a God, I cannot bear it that I am not Thee!" Nietzche, said while banging his head against the asylum wall.
Great speech at the end of
Teach your sons how to shoot a rifle…for aMERica!😂
Is her favorite verse in Colossians 😆😆!!
The Other Guys is a hilarious movie
I'm glad we're not alone!
My husband loves ' The Other Guy's. He's shown me the clip with Will Ferrell 's wife multiple times 🤣
I love that her name was Sheila. We quote the "Sheila" lines a lot at our house!
Fathers don’t necessarily need to be framed as heroes, but they greatly appreciate it when they are. Men enjoy being looked up to. There’s a reason why little boys love comic book superheroes so much.
Edit: I’m well aware that many women enjoy comic books. I never claimed otherwise. However that doesn’t change the fact that those women are the minority. It’s just a simple fact.
Don't all people appreciate high regard?
@@carlamariee1 Of course they do. But men value respect much more deeply than women do. While women value being heard and having their emotions validated far more than men do.
@@armandvega2752 Where's your proof? As Sheila has talked about in the past, men and women actually value respect at virtually identical rates. What makes men or women feel "respected" may vary, but that's likely a reflection of different social expectations. Women likely value being heard and having their emotions validated *as a form of respect* because men have so frequently dismissed them and their feelings; men, on the other hand, have often been stunted in their emotional development and are used to being heard, so they're more likely to view "respect" in terms of power and control.
And by the way, your assessment of boys and superheroes isn't accurate, either. There are lots of women who are into superheroes, and lots of men (myself included) who have never cared for superheroes. If there is a difference between male and female interest in superheroes, it likely comes down to the fact that male superheroes far outnumber female superheroes, and the female superheroes that do exist tend to be heavily sexualized.
@@micahbush5397Sir, please don’t jump to conclusions. My comment about boys liking superheroe is spot on. Most boys do love superheroes, this is brute fact. I’m not making a universal statement about all men and women. I’m making a generalization. Human beings naturally generalize things it’s just how our brains work.
I never said that girls don’t like superheroes. Growing up I had plenty of female friends who were into comics, games, anime etc. What goes unsaid however is that the number of girls who aren’t interested in superheroes dwarfs the number of girls who are. Society nowadays is more accepting of women having masculine interests. However most women still choose traditionally feminine things. That’s why most superheroes are men because women don’t show that much interest, and since women don’t show much interest, comic book writers have little reason to create more female characters. There’s a reason why the romance genre is female oriented/dominated. Do guys consume romance media? Of course! I’m one of them. I love a good romance story. But guys like me are the minority and there’s nothing wrong with that.
As far as sexualized female characters go many of those characters are designed by women and female fans actually enjoy the sexy designs. Not every woman is ok with a scantily clad woman in media but MANY of them are.
Don’t believe me? Google female cosplayers and see for yourself how often women objectify themselves.
Concerning the whole respect thing….. you’re right women value respect just in different ways. My mistake.
Look I’m not one of these chauvinistic pigs who thinks that women voting was a mistake. I just made a generalization about men and boys. That’s all. Was it slightly inaccurate? Yes I admit that but the rest of my point remains valid.
*munches popcorn in “I preferred Star Wars to Disney Princess movies as a child, scared the boys with my snake catching skills, and married a man who definitely needs his emotions validated more than I do”…* 😏
Yes mine is always always always always very very very Godly& Super Super amazing. And He is my Hero here is a shout out to you daddy :)@Sheila Wray Gregoire