This is so real!!!❤Thank you amber and guy for being so real here!! I think most of us feel we’re alone in these feelings but it’s so great to hear that these struggles are ones that we’ve had also!! So amazing!!! ❤
I so appreciate your sharing the end game of belonging to Christ as the key. Thank you Guy and Amber, for being an example of redemption in marriage 💑. Christ truly is our foundation! Thank you for becoming friends again. 💓
This is so encouraging, and common 8n marriages. They were in the devil's trap of fighting in relationships. It was the anxious and avoidant trap, due to their psychological programming of how to relate and show love since in childhood.
Thanks for sharing, friend. If you’d like to talk about your situation with one of our counselors (at no cost to you), call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). May the Lord draw you and your husband closer to Himself and enable you both to serve one another in love in the days ahead. God's best to you!
Hello, friend. Although the videos and other materials produced in our US office are not available in French, our Canada office does have a French-language outreach: focusfamille.ca. Dieu vous bénisse!
💯 percent agree. Mind reading is fun when you're in synchronicity. That expectation is not sustainable in the long term. Communication of needs, wants, and expectations gives your partner a fighting chance at success.
When we were first married, i was shocked that i became the enemy and that my husband labeled me as a terrible mother because he expected me to do everything and he didn’t have to do anything!
I get all this, I’m not a wife with kiddos at home. We are empty nesters. We spend every waking moment with each other. He is content with just me. I love serving at church, getting together with gals for lunch or a coffee. It doesn’t sit well with him. I have to really monitor how much time I spend out of the house... what I volunteer for. His mother was an amazing mother/ wife. Proverbs 31! We’ve been married 48 years, lost a son 5 years ago who I was a caregiver for many years. Now I am trying to find a different way of living...
I understand men aren't mind readers. But to have to tell someone you want them to be thoughtful (and make a card or cake for bday) doesn't sit well with me still.. I feel like that's a must.
I agree, I want someone to be thoughtful and kind, because they feel loving towards me, and as far as the bday, just show me that you think of me, by putting a little forethought into it.
I can appreciate that perspective as expressed as previous precedents. However I can also visualize after having an husband with repeated attempts at doing his personal best @ guessing from his different upbringing the perfect gifts while trying equally as well with making surprises a must as requested or alluding… Then thinking about hearing afterwards which sounds like potentially “failing” in some regards. Like never getting an A+ after working at full potential but typically an c or less with minimum coaching afterwards and seemed more ridicule or condemnation lacks real relationship growth help. If that makes any sense
Typically from my experience By default we hear things straight up as stated. No is simply negative no yes is positive yes. Unlearned We don’t hear that no! Also Meaning but….if you really love me or can can read my mind then you already should know wife is not starting on a diet or had two other parties at church and work or mother Inlaws etc…and don’t need another birthday cake etc…. If that helps from our logical mindset instead of an emotional response
I like the idea of performing the actions, in hopes that it'll be rewarded in time. That's faith, instead of pretense. It's a "do it, til you renew it", spirit for me, instead of "fake it til you make it" one.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5,6
Ok so what do you do when he acts one way before "I do", sets up the expectation, and then turns it off like a switch and completely ignores you for the next 15 years?
Thanks for sharing about this situation, Jennet. To talk more and offer appropriate assistance, we invite to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you) -- please call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). Blessings and peace to you and yours.
Soooooo, she is getting her love bank filled through words of affirmation coming from her sons. What's going to happen when her kids fly from the nest?
My husband is truly a bad driver. Friends and family won't or don't like to be a passenger. It is very necessary for me to instruct, say, "watch out" or did you see that car? A test by a driving agency recommended he not drive anymore. HELP!
Amen Jakki, yes, safety for others, considers others better than ourselves, you can write DMV and person can be tested or it can come from Dr Jesus peace John 14:27
It was simply an example in this couple's marriage. Maybe it is best to help your husband while driving. Take your marriage to the Lord and ask Him to convict you of your own sin/areas that need growth. He will! Then, tackle (in His strength) those areas. Each marriage is different. 😊
I thought the word trigger in the series was the same that they use in mental health. Such as something that brings on or worsens symptoms of people with a history of trauma. I mean, I know trigger can mean a reaction to something that bothers us, but I think I took this to a whole other level of the word trigger in this series.
The trigged life is a normal life style for some of us. But we are a bit better now we give each other LOTS and LOTS of space, separate bedrooms was a win for us. LOL
My problem is that i assumed that i was unmarried, (divorced twice), until people started presenting to me, that i was married. I feel very angry and frustrated about the fact that i MIGHT be connected to someone i do not like , love, or want to share my life with. First, i would have to know WHO THAT IS.
Hello, Claudia. We're sorry we don’t have the resources to add captions to most of our videos at this time. Our digital team is working on this. In the meantime, please know that there are written transcripts for most of our programs here - bit.ly/3N9BcC9. We hope this is helpful. God bless you.
I understand that you have to work on yourself, but when you have a husband that if it isn't done his way, he won't help or compromise And you always wrong & told he never said or did that. And talked to as if you have to prove it.
Amen, makes you realize how many people are in the same boat
This is so real!!!❤Thank you amber and guy for being so real here!! I think most of us feel we’re alone in these feelings but it’s so great to hear that these struggles are ones that we’ve had also!! So amazing!!! ❤
I so appreciate your sharing the end game of belonging to Christ as the key. Thank you Guy and Amber, for being an example of redemption in marriage 💑. Christ truly is our foundation! Thank you for becoming friends again. 💓
Thank you for sharing ❤
This is Excellent!! Thank you.
I found this so helpful❤️
Thnku this was really powerful and helpful
This is so encouraging, and common 8n marriages.
They were in the devil's trap of fighting in relationships. It was the anxious and avoidant trap, due to their psychological programming of how to relate and show love since in childhood.
Hearing and it seams like you are sharing my story with my husband.
Thanks for sharing, friend. If you’d like to talk about your situation with one of our counselors (at no cost to you), call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). May the Lord draw you and your husband closer to Himself and enable you both to serve one another in love in the days ahead. God's best to you!
Plz do we have some speaking in french?
Hello, friend. Although the videos and other materials produced in our US office are not available in French, our Canada office does have a French-language outreach: focusfamille.ca. Dieu vous bénisse!
💯 percent agree. Mind reading is fun when you're in synchronicity. That expectation is not sustainable in the long term. Communication of needs, wants, and expectations gives your partner a fighting chance at success.
THANKS SO SO MUCH FOR YOUR POST
When we were first married, i was shocked that i became the enemy and that my husband labeled me as a terrible mother because he expected me to do everything and he didn’t have to do anything!
Yup
Now why would you go and say something that paints your husband in a such a bad light as that, in the public eye?
I get all this, I’m not a wife with kiddos at home. We are empty nesters. We spend every waking moment with each other. He is content with just me. I love serving at church, getting together with gals for lunch or a coffee. It doesn’t sit well with him. I have to really monitor how much time I spend out of the house... what I volunteer for. His mother was an amazing mother/ wife. Proverbs 31! We’ve been married 48 years, lost a son 5 years ago who I was a caregiver for many years. Now I am trying to find a different way of living...
Call to “focus on the family” and schedule time with free professional counselors!
Don’t delay!
Blessings to you and your family.
Aq
I understand men aren't mind readers. But to have to tell someone you want them to be thoughtful (and make a card or cake for bday) doesn't sit well with me still.. I feel like that's a must.
And that’s the problem. Thinking it’s a must but not wanting to communicate it’s a must.
I agree, I want someone to be thoughtful and kind, because they feel loving towards me, and as far as the bday, just show me that you think of me, by putting a little forethought into it.
Someone might need to learn your “love language”.
I can appreciate that perspective as expressed as previous precedents.
However I can also visualize after having an husband with repeated attempts at doing his personal best @ guessing from his different upbringing the perfect gifts while trying equally as well with making surprises a must as requested or alluding…
Then thinking about hearing afterwards which sounds like potentially “failing” in some regards.
Like never getting an A+ after working at full potential but typically an c or less with minimum coaching afterwards and seemed more ridicule or condemnation lacks real relationship growth help.
If that makes any sense
Typically from my experience By default we hear things straight up as stated.
No is simply negative no
yes is positive yes.
Unlearned We don’t hear that no! Also Meaning but….if you really love me or can can read my mind then you already should know wife is not starting on a diet or had two other parties at church and work or mother Inlaws etc…and don’t need another birthday cake etc….
If that helps from our logical mindset instead of an emotional response
This was refreshing. Thank you!
We're glad you enjoyed this broadcast, Shanann! Blessings!
❤ Love overcomes fears and troubles
I like the idea of performing the actions, in hopes that it'll be rewarded in time. That's faith, instead of pretense.
It's a "do it, til you renew it", spirit for me, instead of "fake it til you make it" one.
VERY VERY INTERESTING
I kept being confused on why amber
Kept referring to her husband as “guy “ lol , then I saw it’s his name!
😂
PREACH Sister Amber! 🙏🙏🙏🙏
What is expected of me against what I hear. Brilliant. Thanks for everything.
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, submit to Him, and He will make your paths straight." - Proverbs 3:5,6
Ok so what do you do when he acts one way before "I do", sets up the expectation, and then turns it off like a switch and completely ignores you for the next 15 years?
Thanks for sharing about this situation, Jennet. To talk more and offer appropriate assistance, we invite to talk with one of our counselors (at no cost to you) -- please call 855-771-HELP (4357) weekdays between 6 A.M. and 8 P.M. (MT). Blessings and peace to you and yours.
Amen 🙏🏻 🙏🏻🙏🏻
Soooooo, she is getting her love bank filled through words of affirmation coming from her sons. What's going to happen when her kids fly from the nest?
My husband is truly a bad driver. Friends and family won't or don't like to be a passenger. It is very necessary for me to instruct, say, "watch out" or did you see that car? A test by a driving agency recommended he not drive anymore. HELP!
Amen Jakki, yes, safety for others, considers others better than ourselves, you can write DMV and person can be tested or it can come from Dr
Jesus peace John 14:27
It was simply an example in this couple's marriage. Maybe it is best to help your husband while driving. Take your marriage to the Lord and ask Him to convict you of your own sin/areas that need growth. He will! Then, tackle (in His strength) those areas. Each marriage is different. 😊
What about if your spouse constantly telling you if it weren't for the kids.....
🙏🙏🙏
What would you advise for a woman who is married to an unbeliever?
1 Corinthians 7: 13-16
I rather have the divorce than endure the suffering 😢
It takes two to do homework and pass the test.
I thought the word trigger in the series was the same that they use in mental health. Such as something that brings on or worsens symptoms of people with a history of trauma. I mean, I know trigger can mean a reaction to something that bothers us, but I think I took this to a whole other level of the word trigger in this series.
The trigged life is a normal life style for some of us.
But we are a bit better now we give each other LOTS and LOTS of space, separate bedrooms was a win for us.
LOL
Around the 3:00 mark he swore. I saw his wife's face. And that was it for me. Focus on the Family What's up with that?
He didn’t finish the word “she” and then repeated it.
He said shifted
My problem is that i assumed that i was unmarried, (divorced twice), until people started presenting to me, that i was married. I feel very angry and frustrated about the fact that i MIGHT be connected to someone i do not like , love, or want to share my life with. First, i would have to know WHO THAT IS.
Subtitles please :')
Hello, Claudia. We're sorry we don’t have the resources to add captions to most of our videos at this time. Our digital team is working on this. In the meantime, please know that there are written transcripts for most of our programs here - bit.ly/3N9BcC9. We hope this is helpful. God bless you.
I understand that you have to work on yourself, but when you have a husband that if it isn't done his way, he won't help or compromise And you always wrong & told he never said or did that. And talked to as if you have to prove it.