10 Tactics to Put a Narcissist in Their Place
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- Опубліковано 11 вер 2021
- 10 Tactics to Put a Narcissist in Their Place. In this video, we cover 10 ways to put a narcissistic person in their place. You will learn techniques to put down the narcissist in case it's someone you can't get away from.
Do you have a narcissist in your life?
Before you embark on the journey of putting a narcissist in their place, there is one thing you should keep in mind. It will be the fight of your life. If you have been allowing a narcissist to manipulate you and dominate you for a long time, it will be a fight to change things. But you will be so glad you did. Narcissists are wired to be abusive because they lack empathy. They naturally take offense and misunderstand the needs and perspective of others. They can be rattled by the tiniest thing.
When they get angry, they may call the other person names, confront them, use slurs against them, use closed-off behavior, or the silent treatment. They can do it in a very calm and cold way, which is even more disturbing than if they’d rejected you openly.
It’s good for you to realize that the narcissist is not going to change, and you’ll be relieved when you realize you can spend your energy somewhere else. It will be the fight of your life, but it will be worth it. Here are 10 tactics to put a narcissist in their place. We recommend you stick with us until sign number 10. When you hear number 10, you will be surprised you never thought of it.
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We also have a video on 10 Phrases to Stop a Narcissist --> ua-cam.com/video/iSEVBmIPhB8/v-deo.html
@Ten too the left want to take everything because to them, working hard and having anything is selfish. On the otherhand, not working, having babies out of wedlock, and collecting welfare is noble.
@Ten too yes, absolutely. Up is down, good is bad, bad is good. Everything is now backwards.
Their biggest addiction, even if they do drugs, is drama and emotional chaos! I use to say the real addiction is drama the cocaine is to keep it spinning and the booze to keep it swimming but drama is their real fix.
@@Richard-vq7ud Give a young mom some credit. A young mother scared on her own judged by people like you. She figures it out puts that baby first before anything and everything scary diapers food no sleep figuring how to be a mom they grow become more responsible than you ever can be. The bond that's shared becomes one love. My daughter 26 grandson 7 she was the only child she was taught right but things happen when you play grown up grown up happens. She is the best mom that baby is the most important everything to her she has put him before herself wants needs even a life he comes first he is gifted and she gets hatpc(heavens angel) gamanana Seiarra. Mother Mary father Lawrence. We are the angelofGode
@@patriciajohnson9903 im happy for you. Most women purposely have babies out of wedlock, and that is selfish. A child deserves both a mother and a father. You can call me judgemental for placing needs of a child first if it makes you feel good.
I've tried all of this, for many years, and it is exhausting. None of this will work if you're dealing with someone with pathological narcissism. You, simply, cannot beat someone with pathological narcissism at his or her own game, and you will wear yourself out trying to. The only solution you have when dealing with a narcissist is to leave. I have been planning my escape for months. I cannot wait until I'm finally able to leave. I'm not even giving any warning. I'm just leaving.
This is freaking amazing. Narcissists cannot reason, if they could they wouldn't be narcs in the first place
Yeah, this advice works for narcissists you have limited exposure to. When it’s an intimate partner this won’t help, best stay as far away as possible.
The best thing you can do is to make yourself vanish from their life without notice and without a trace. Plan your escape. Tell no one. Make your escape while the narc is gone. Narcs believe they own their spouse much like any other piece of property and they don't tolerate losing control over those they own. Many become violent. Protect yourself. Be careful. Know that you deserve better! Good luck to you!
I agree, nothing will work. You have to leave before they harm you further. Mine knew I was done and instead of me calling 911 on him when he restrained me when I tried to get away from his abuse, he did a bogus tpo on me and had me thrown out to steal all of my possessions. You can have no mercy with these evil souls. Johnny Ray Cannon, Brasstown NC - I his 5th victim with the help of his pastor father, James Cannon, Spring Hill FL and our pastor at Catalyst Church, Hayesville NC and evil narcissistic attorney, Bill Schilling of Murphy and Franklin NC. We need sites to warn each other of these evil charmers!
These are all temporary fixes to get through the current situation or problem the Narc has presented.... Other than that it will be a repeated cycle until YOU get tired bc the Narc will not
I put my narcissist in his place, out of my life. The four years I've had without him are the best I've had since I met him. Life is wonderful!
There you go! My thoughts and actions exactly! Kick them right to the curb and keep on moving down the road. Good for you!
Thank the Lord, that you did not waste more time on this type of individual.
Good for you. If you want to live a positive, happy life, you'll need to cut out the narcissists, they're negative, depressing, and controling. Enjoy your "new-found" freedom!
Exactly, easier said then done. But, anyone you have to work that hard at getting along with, probably doesn't need to be in your life.
What if the narcissist is a close family member who happens to be an alcoholic
Ignore narcissists COMPLETELY with no exception, it drives them absolutely crazy but is fun to watch ! Excellent video 👍
All when you do this they then become more abusive to get a reaction. You have to stay strong and not react or join in with their nonsense. My abuser has even been to the police about me but he has no evidence because it is a lie.
@@Rabswood296 let them escalate. Ignore and walk away. Give their misery back to them.
They go absolutely insane. Some are dangerous. Use caution.
Why would you want to “torture” people with a mental health problem?
@@The_Malaka I’m not torturing anyone, I don’t say or do anything. He’s doing it to himself by way of his own unacceptable anti social behaviour ! I’m just an involuntary witness !
The only way you can put narcissists "in their place" is to get away from them and never contact them again. They are toxic and incurable!
@@Crazy_Clown_In_Town-kx3zq Much as one would want to do that, they will only bad mouth you to others, project their narcissism on to you, and play the victim. Sadly, you cannot insult someone and make them feel like crap if they're perfect. ☹
Hard when it’s your mother
@@kittybluett8887 Of course! Equally hard if it's another family member, or your boss, or a work colleague... The point I am making is that there is no way of "curing" them or "getting the upper hand" and if you can't go no contact, you should limit contact as much as you can, and understand that the problem is them and not you.
@@chrisantoniou4366 yes, I know now that my mother has a disorder and cannot help the way she is, still hard to deal with. I’m mostly as low contact with her as possible and when she gets to hard to deal with I stay away for awhile. She’s 90 now and I’m 67, I have 2 brothers who she managed to turn against me, they blame me for not being able to deal with her but they protect themselves by being mostly low contact with her.
1-call them by their name
2-remind them to stick to the subject
3-if they attack you, do not attack them back. No trigger with an asshole.
4-do not take responsibility for their emotion. Their emotions have nothing to do with u.
5-until they stop attacking you, do not talk to them
6-do not give them excuses
7-keep track of communication with them
8-do not be afraid and what they might do.
9-do not let let them be the center of your universe
10-do not let them rush you
11-learn to say no.
Thanks
Thanks
12. Make sure that you are not dependent on the narcissist in any way...socially, emotionally, careerwise or financially.
If you are, find ways to break that dependency.
@@Coryraisa facts….I did this instinctively and then told my narcissist off and then went no contact. Best decision I ever made in my life
It takes a lot of time and nervs to stop playing their game, specially when they did a lot to make you be or feel alone.
1. Call them by their name
2. Remind them to stick to the subject
3. Don’t take responsibility for their emotions
4. Don’t talk until they stop attacking you
5. Don’t deceive yourself
6. Call them out on their deception
7. Don’t be afraid
8. Don’t let them be the center of your universe
9. Don’t be rushed or pressured
10. Learn how to say no
Number 4 means = forever? Constantly being passive aggressive.
Thank you
This was more useful than the actual video
Thank you:)
@@joaoomega6627.... no ! if someone is attacking you, they are manipulating you to keep you arguing to make it your fault. Passive aggressive is something else. # 4 is setting a boundary where you don't engage unless they comply. They can't argue with you if you don't argue back.
The worst thing you can do a narcissist,is ignore what they say. Narcissists can't stand not being heard.
Yes, they cant stand being ignored .and that is exactly why they might change their behaviour, unless theres a pay-off such as narc fuel. Learn how to modulate your own emotions so they arent getting any fuel from their bad behaviour. Part of thar is realising that its actually our thoughts that cause us to feel bad. We can observe our selves and see this clearly, its not apparent at first.
the narcissist man who's been stalking me for more than 10 years just doesn't know how to stop and let others live in peace with their privacy. how to get rid of such animal?? ignoring them just makes him grow more and more obsessive!!! i really need help
@@oVnftJjVzihkSgaqXleCEI
Get a restraining order
@@oVnftJjVzihkSgaqXleCEIdon't think a piece of paper can save you. Take a self defense class and if you are comfortable with guns, go to a shooting range for classes
Thats thenone I like. Let them rage , yell, scream. When they run out of steam or ask a question, say " what? Huh? I wasnt listening. I tuned you out and was thinking of something else. "
Took me a long time to tell people no. But when I finally did, it felt so good!. People mistake my kindness for weakness, they couldn't be more wrong.
Kindness is power. Keep a strong current of power to repel and banish evil.
Right on spot 👍🏻
It’s such a shame that one dare not be kind towards people anymore. This world has gone mad!! 🤬🤬🤬
Someone said that to me, some people take kindness for weakness. But I heard a different version of this saying. Kindness is not weakness it is strength under control. This is the typical narcissistic attitude and they only see kindness as weakness. For me personally I see kindness as the best way to communicate with others. And I believe that whenever you project kindness to a narcissistic person, they see it as weakness and that's when they started pounding on you. And you don't want to say anything to them because everything you say to them is falling on deaf ears they can only hear your own thoughts and they cannot feel the pain that they cause others, because their hearts are only connected to their own feelings.
I listen to the song "FourFiveSeconds," by Paul McCartney, Rhianna, and Kanye West.
A recurring line in it: "All of my kindness is taken for weakness."
Kindness is a super power! When the world screams screw those people you step up and help those people. Remember people are the most important asset in the world.
Block and delete them. That’s the only correct place for a narcissist. Periodt.
I did and found my peace.
Tell it to the children born to narcissistic parents.
Those are all wonderful techniques for narcs you can simply avoid or cut off, people only think about narcissists in romantic relationships, yes they can be quite damaging, especially if they are in a position of control.
But there's nothing worse than having narcissistic parents, children can't rely on techniques or block and delete.
What an easy life it would be if narcs were only phone contacts.
🤣🤣🤣😘 - exact ❣
The correct place for the narc is far - far - fucking far away from you.
If you do not see, hear and smell them - you done all right.
@@Sarablueunicorn It's more difficult - but you can go no contact when you are adult - they never loved you.
I finally had to block my narcissistic daughter to give me some piece of mind. She fabricates stories that aren't true. For her last 5 births with husband Ricardo Gonzalez, she has never contacted me on their births or invite me to see Grandchildren and bond with. For that reason I don't know the grandkids and don't have a love for them. Quite sad that a narcissist can ruin family dynamics.
The only way to take control from a narcissist is to get yourself from their domain first. You wont be able to figure out anything until and unless you are out of the hellish world. I will tell you one of my favourite stories. Once a King was too disturbed by everything that was happening around him. He felt as if no one was loyal to him and he was always afraid of his kingdom being attacked by perpetrators. He lost his sleep and his life had become hell. So he thought of taking a brief sojourn in the countryside. He passed through lush green fields and picturesque landscapes. The silent breeze that brushed through his hair filled his heart with joy. That is when he saw a farmer who was putting fence around his farmland. But his farmland had weeds all over and they hardly had any crops. This intrigued the King. He asked the farmer as to why was he putting a fence around the farm when the farm itself was covered with weeds. To this the farmer said that the farm was his own so he could get rid of the weeds whenever he liked. But he cant stop the stray dogs from running over his fields and destroying them. That is why he was putting the fence. To stop the stray dogs from venturing into the field. Once he was very assured about the security of his fields he can work on clearing the weeds and planting crops. On hearing this the King somewhat got the answer which he had been searching for. The human mind is also like the field. You cant control assholes from fiddling with your mind or saying bullshit. But you can definitely put a fence ( figuratively) so that these assholes cant influence you. And until and unless you dont put a fence you can never work on yourself. Once you have distanced yourself from toxic people then you can work on the healing process. Same is the case with narcs. Narcs are these stray dogs who suck your energy emotionally. They play mind games for fun because their mind wants melodrama. They hurt the very people who love them. So total isolation from these narcs is absolutely essential for the well being of your Mind. Once you are out of their mind games you can take decisions rationally. Narcs try to drain you emotionally. So everytime you respond to their low vibrations you tend to come to their level. But when you react confidently without panicking and without responding to their negative vibrations that is when you Win. When someone realises that you arent being influenced or being manipulated by their actions they will get tired of it. And after cutting them off completely from your lives you should work on your healing process. Work on clearing your mental clutter and keep yourself preoccupied. Read books and most importantly try to find your Purpose in life. When you find your Purpose you will be able to bear any pain in this World. Most importantly help others in need. When you find someone else who is stuck with a narc help them to get out of that. I feel this is the way to take control from a narcissist. P.S: I hardly find people around me who know about emotional abuse. But I think everyone should read and know about it. In today’s mean world you will find a lot of people who try to influence you or demoralise you using the sweetest of words. Its about identifying these covert manipulators and distancing yourself from them. I have immense respect for people who have survived narcissistic partners. They happen to be the most strongheaded and emotionally stable people you can come across. I learn a lot of things from them. Truly the broken will always be the most beautiful. What ever you do, don’t attempt to tail your spouse in the hopes of catching him or her cheating. Get a professional to do it for you Metaspyhub@gmail. com Ethical remote App - particularly if you need this evidence to file for divorce and damages.
Tears rolled down my eyes after i read your comment. Thank you for that supportive words🙏🏻
You're correct. This takes tremendous strength. If this doesn't improve the situation with a narc, then permanently walk away!! Don't look back. In the end you'll be much better off. This does not exclude family members. This applies to all toxic relationships. God bless and be strong!! It can and will get better!!❤✝️🌈🙏🕊🕊🕊🕊🌞
Some narcissists do not accept No for an answer. These malevolent type narcissists are like mental rapists. They are the worst. Get and keep them out of your life forever.
ua-cam.com/video/W-vdkRG-dvM/v-deo.htmlsi=IGs2QcwwqjTpCKhQ
I fell victim to a narcissist and then one day, I turned the table on them. I lost my fear, I locked away my emotion and took control of the situation. The narcassist did not like that one bit, but I stuck to my guns, I did call them out on their lies and I did that in front of others and that person could not handle that I did that. I was told to get out of their life. I smiled and waved goodbye and today I have peace. If I can do it, so can you.
I believe this is what I need to do to put a stop to my years of dealing with my narcissist. Her biggest fear is being exposed but I'm a quiet person. I can't take it anymore. I know exactly how you felt to come to that point of taking a stand.
So very true. He didn't like when I stood my ground, he'd drag me to the bedroom to make an example of me, how dare I ever have had an opinion. Sex was where he felt most powerful, it NEVER mattered if I had a pulse or was crying, begging 4 it 2 stop, yet I didn't wanna be fussy & whiney, played my hand. I only shared truth tho, experience, real life. He took my punk rock youth & rebellion & channeled it onto Soundcloud songs as twisted & varied as he. N personality? Can't say I have ever met anyone as in love w themselves & as cold & ready to flee if he felt ill @ ease. Almost 6 yrs of that insanity & I still wanna slap myself 4 buying any of it past day ONE.
I did that with my sister. She triangulated her siblings for years. Then she moved on to abusing my mom. My sister knows people are on to her and therefore she is in hiding. She finally got what she deserved.
Lol doubt it was a narcissist or you'd have smear campaigns, people thinking you were the bad person, disbelief because they'd have already anticipated that. If your dealing with a real narcissistic personality they are three steps ahead of you as they've had to Forsee reactions from childhood. A master manipulate as the truly disordered cannot be even spoken to or they would call police after you left and bullshit a statement to have you arrested, questioned and held in a jail cell for hours just to prove they can hurt you. Horrible but the reality is do not give advice like this to true cases as they most definitely would frame you with something to respond.. Best to say nothing and expose in court. Don't provoke someone like a jealous person as they just play victim and over exaggerate ,they'd have it said you threatened or swore despite it being total bs. If I had my time over to replay it, this nasty piece of work I dealt with would have been used as a floor mop and then I'd have went to sleep in a cell for something rather than simply telling a particularly nasty operator to stay away from me. Simple as that,keep your mouth shut or do the job properly. Make the cell stay worth it but try to stay away and always be silent on social media too,no names no backlash.
@Susan Roussouw how did you turn the tables on them? I’m good at ignoring or shrugging off what they say, but I don’t know how to call them out in front of others. They love to call you out in front of others and it’s awful at work.
Walk away don't bother putting the narc in its place, don't interact with them focus on yourself the narc hates that plus it's self empowering that's amazing feeling and it works
Thank you Avril.
Right! 💕
I think this is good advice for dealing with a boss or coworker, or a cousin at a wedding. I like the name thing, there’s power in a name… but an intimate relationship?? When you know, you GO.
You’re not going to “put” a narcissist any “place”; they live in their own world. ✌🏼
@@kelhow1181
Very true. I see, a Sir Tudor fan 👌.
@@ntombifuthiyika5975 😁 I had a hard time listening to him when I was really in the throes of things, years ago. Now I’ve rediscovered him & totally loving the “Harry’s wife” series!
100% right - AVOID - AVOID - AVOID !
Gray rock - block - and no contact.
If you have that beast at work and you can't quit yet - stone wall them.
If they want talk to you - you need to go for a piss so bad - or you need to do a important phone call - right than or go to make a copy or what ever makes you move away from them.
I couldn't believe how accurate these points are, thank you 😊. Married for 31 yrs and she hid these traits for the first 15yrs. These are wicked people and carry a curse.
First step is Knowing what a narcissist is. Second step is identifying a narcissist. Third step is using effective actions to counter a narcissist. Best methods that have worked for me personally and comfortably are, ignore them, converse with others as if there not there, look straight at them calling them by name,DONT ever show or emit weakness. Be of your own will power at all times,laughter will make them self destruct. YOU have the power, keep it! Be careful whom you talk to and what you say, narcissist use back stabbing channels and are highly manipulative to weak minded unsuspecting people around them.
True they always take the moral high ground. You have to keep your cool. Don't bad mouth them to others. Often they come across to others as totally likeable . The covert narcs are the worst, they love playing the victim.
@Rabswood296 by far the hardest to deal with. I live with one who's got heart failure and she uses it.
“There is simply no winning with a narcissist. They will treat you so horribly that you will become withdrawn and depressed and then they will turn around and say, ‘You’re no fun anymore, you’re always so depressed. I need to be with someone more positive.’” - Susan Williams
Same if your sick. You will see how uninterested in you they become. 😢💔 You become a form of baggage or burden.
@@luvmyangels3 yes concur completely God bless you I've even had one sy to me of gynaecologic problems "is it cont@gious?" No compssion or empthy just worried if they will catch something, @lmost everyone knows,,, is not contgious but just the way some women are mde to suffer Unbelievable
She*
@@sn95_capo32 Sorry, i don't comprehend your messge, comment? It just pure&simple s@ys *she* ? 🤔🍀🙏
Why he? Many people who end marrying a narcissist were brought up by a narcissist mother. It's not so easy to get them out of your life as a husband or wife.
Put a narcissist in their place? That's only emotional energy that serves to benefit them. The only way to handle a narcissist is absolute silence, because they're not going to understand what you have to say anyway. Their narcissism will always stand in the way
That’s right - they’ll feed off any input. They’ll twist your words and play the victim. Turn your back and walk away.
SssSssa#zssaazs@👏🏻
I'm awestruck! To know that these soulless beings walk amongst us that have good intentions & believe in truth & integrity & then there's the Narcissists that prey on tens of thousands.. I am not alone anymore I have seen thanks to the 'net & I am not "crazy" or jealous or insane... I was duped! I was strung along. I was a victim & fell so hard for lies. He stole my music taste & style & MY experiences & wrote them into his songs & dares to claim as many jerks do, that "she's a crazy B!". I am healing afa that wasted 6 years goes, I finally don't crumble when he doesn't call or show up for DAYS, I even bought his new wardrobe & gave so much of my blood, sweat, tears. Are there childhood issues & trauma like mommy issues that these love vampires have in common? Still learning about wtf really happened the last years I was in a fog of confusion & self doubt... Even when the absolute truth was in my hands, he'd convince me I was wrong
3:05 " dont respond to the narcissist". I have to sort of disagree.. if the narc is a person in your friend group, with the loudest voice and the loudest laugh, and theyve got their sights set on you... it's going to be tough. If you walk away from them if they start to dump on you (say at a table at the bar) in front of others, and you don't "fire back" somewhat, your silence will look as if you had no comeback ready , and the friendgroup will see that and look at you as if you "retreated" or "uh oh, Bill just blasted Marty again."
It' s a tough battle i've had with ppl over the years :/ Silence wont stop them, only appease them. Youve got to have comebacks ready to meet them fire with fire (not heavy handed, but humorous comebacks/sarcasm can work) or they'll create a negative feedback loop.
@@Defender78 You see I look at things differently. I don't associate myself with any narcissist. So you wouldn't find me at a table socializing with one
The tactic that works for me is to directly challenge their ego and character in front of other people. A narcissist will always take the bait if you bait them by making the first move. As soon as you set the hook, they are yours to control. But you can’t fear them.
It will only enhance the rage inside a covert narcissist and then they will prey on you when you will have your guards down.
@@khawarafzalkiani2127 that’s why you cut them off after you obliterate them.
How do you set the bait
@@dearines anything involving their insecurities.
But when it's your boss you bite your tongue
I love that comment about the zoo. “Don’t feed the animals”❤ that really puts into perspective
ignore
ignore
ignore
ignore
file a retraining order
ignore
ignore
ignore
that's how you deal with a narcissist
Yup
My restraining order was denied..Back to the ignore..
Yup
Try filing a harassment claim if restraining order doesn’t work
This is exactly what I was about to say. Narcissists need attention and validation like a plant needs sun and water.
Deprive and they will go somewhere else sooner or later.
NO CONTACT is the only way to keep your peace of mind and put the narcissist in their place. Otherwise you will continue to be played with like a toy, manipulated and disrespected by a narcissist.
Yeah but, she's my wife!
Divorce her, you're in a toxic relationship, it's going to go that way anyways. Narcs 99 percent of the time do not and don't want to change.
Self love stops a narcissist. We all have issues. Strengthen your boundaries. 🤍
Wow so true.
Amen so true
Amen
So true.
Consequences are equally as important as boundaries because narcissists easily trample boundaries. Resolutely stand your ground and actively follow through with the consequence... repeatedly.
Honestly this is a battle I fight every single day. Three years now. This video is on point! I have got to get away from this situation NOW. :(
We’re probably addicted to these people and need to wein off
Oho y are so strong 💪. Don't loose hope. God always be with u.
yes. leaving is far better than the delusion that you'll be able to shift things. you won't and you'll just waste time and emotional energy trying.
Me too! Thank the parents they know who they put out in this world
I hope you managed your escape and were careful not to leave any traces
Most of these tips actually give the narcissist too much attention and rob your time. No contact is the only solution.
“A narcissist paints a picture of themselves as being the victim or innocent in all aspects. They will be offended by the truth. But what is done in the dark will come to light. Time has a way of showing people’s true colors.” - Karla Grimes
The way you describe a narcissist reminds Amber Heard
@@ocupax338 👍👍
@@ocupax338 she is typical example
Thank you I've always said the truth will always come out. It can take time but just like the cream will always rise to the top
@@arthercamelot1140 God bless you 👍🍀🙏What a beautifully brilliant way you have to describe, folk reveal & shows their true colours, in the end🕊️👍🍀🙏Wondrous & full of enlightenment
Sincerely hope lifes treating you extremely kindly
#11. Get out. Get away.
Go no-contact. Live your best life away from their drama & toxicity.
How? With no resources ?
@@LoveGod1987 leave anyway. Eventually they will kill you.
I agree
I almost died before I did
Even if no one else ever sees them for who they are
You do
You're important no.1 for yourself
My beginning of the end was a simple question..I said ,we all have shortcomings and I was pounded on..anyone who cannot agree to their own failings is delusional..and I mean this in a close relationship..not a topic for strangers
@@samirahahmed9431 you almost died?
What if that person is my father?
Yes changing the subject used to drive me crazy. She would always tell me, I have to push your buttons to get a response. Yes always said I was being defensive all the time. It's just maddening! All types of abuse they show. It's just so crazy. 15 years of that madness and finally I got divorced.
Yes. People who remember your weaknesses and triggers so they can deliberately provoke you are cruel
I subscribed. Everything is very true. I was set free after my narcissist ex girlfriend assaulted me and the police took her to jail. First week in full detox recovery. I desire your prayers and positive energy.
Glory to you for flushing this vermin down the toilet, my heart goes out to you, the hardest part is over and the nightmare is behind you, and never go back, these people are good at playing the poor little things when they want to be taken back. I wish you a great life.
Thank you for subscribing and sharing your story. Wishing you strength during your recovery.
There's no winning against a narcissist. The biggest accomplishment you can achieve is to just save yourself and get yourself out before you fall in too deep.
You can also learn a lot from a relationship with a narcissist. One of the things is that NO ONE CAN HURT YOU, because they are just programs in your mind that you can turn off. It doesn't matter what other people say, if you are at peace with yourself.
one thing is for certain, none of us are narcissists!
Oh yes there is! For one, I can testify to it, they hate the very utmost, their own medicine, their own things, what they do to their targets. Do it my @potatopotat5000 friend? It worked very well to me, just have good self control & patience, yeahh & money.
Winning is getting rid of them.
It’s not called relationship it’s manipulationship
😅
Absolutely agree 👍! All about control 🙄
I still have a long way to go bc it took me so long to realize what I was dealing with!!! I just know that I'm not "liked" anymore bc I became my own person. He cannot deal with that but he won't leave either... what makes it harder is the quiet manipulation, I could probably have blown it out of the water if he verbally controlled me. I know my stress will leave with him!!
Yes agree that
@@XFonti-ik3ql the fvlpp what store are you at Kroger vinegar q
calmly doing research on my narc roommate cause like gi joe said "knowing is half the battle" thank you for this
This has been my life time education, like many of you guys! One time he had been ranting at me about the usual stuff: “you always do things like this…” etcetera. I just thanked him for his feedback in a very polite way. He was gobsmacked😂 he does not feel that powerful anymore. I had been praying for assistence and assistence was granted. Thank heavens! My best wishes to all of you❤
Praying can work miracles. God is great.
Praying!! That is how I survived for 54years of marriage with a narcissist. He's 80 now and still at it!! Jesus carried me through all this years, although not always easy
I loved that one ” thank you for your feed back”👍🏻, I will use that one.. 😂😂
I ghosted my narcissist and never looked back. One of the best decision I’ve ever made. I don’t ask about him but from what our mutual friends tell me ghosting him absolutely got his attention and put him in his place
You were the narcissist....
Petty
That’s the only scenario where I think ghosting is excusable: when you’re really being mistreated. Good for you!
@@Featherfinder Thank you
@@samgibson684 Troll
The ONLY effective action to take against an abuser is to put several hundred miles between yourself and them. Never forget that the abuser is “right” in his/her mind. You will not convince a person who is “right” that their abuse is wrong. Save yourself; there is no way to save the abuser.
I couldn’t stop tears rushing down my cheeks. I hope these work. I don’t think I can take anymore. It just seems like a circle repeating itself. I’m ….soooo ….. drained.
It took me over 4 years to actually understand everything and it's not been easy as you said, thank you so much for helping me identify the narcissist that was* in my life, I greatly appreciate the advice...I needed it and used it, thank you🤘
All narcissists are very good at shifting blame and have very good social skills too. They also have loyal followers who do anything for them. I am an introvert and a domineering narcissist gave me the silent treatment. It was so nice when toxic people give me the silent treatment. It was like the garbage took itself out.
Any engagement feeds them. This is literally continuing the cycle.
I learned this the HARD way. I will never make this mistake again
@@Iceis_Phoenix yes,me too. It takes a lot of practice to not engage them. Gray rock is a skill
Please do not do any of these.
It can be an will be EXTREMELY DAMAGING and DANGEROUS! This is ideal for only unhealthy and at minimum, toxic behaviors however please do NOT openly do this unless only inside yourself until you are able to escape 💜
I think this video is very helpful in empowering victims to get away to an extent. If we are not able to leave, PLEASE DO NOT DO ANY OF THIS !
Thanks 😢 Suggestion if you live with one that knows everything about you and your life? Roommate is attempting blackmail
keeping calm, and being able to speak calmly to them/with them is my issue. I come from a jaded/violent past, in my past I saw these personalities as bullies, I loved destroying bullies-physically/spiritually in everyway...I had a stroke because of this behaviour-no it wasn't the cause of my stroke, just another contributing factor-recently I have been doing some more gardening in my spiritual life and as we all well know, violence breeds violence, I need answers that are practical and violence free, tho devastating to a Narcissists world, not their life only the foundations that their being decieved by and trusting in...I'm more concerned with being at peace with all creation, that includes bullies-I know I can never share peace with them, but oh to be free of the violence! TY for your two cents, hopefully I'll spend it wisely!...-
Leave asap and Never look back, that's how you deal with those toxic demons.
Correct !
They DO have a certain Devil energy about them...
I had a narcissist was living with me and it was harder to get rid of her and I had to put an restraining order on her so far it works game over and I'm getting back to my self again at peace.
@Thor Odinson I couldn't even tell you how sorry I am. Time never pays for someone taking a loved one away in such a horrific manner.
Its pretty hard to leave when it's your child 😕 😔 😪
I use to praise my narc ALL the time. He started treating me worse and worse. I NEVER knew that personal praise brought out the extra evil 👿 monster in them. Thank you for this.
I praised this guy i hung out with and he dropped me. He thought he could get better.
He hasnt.
@@Iceis_Phoenix fucking karma
..."the extra evil monster in them"...💯
@@ilae.williams8280 yes 100./. True
Diedra--YES! And 8f you "co-parent" with one, if you do them a favor or do some extra parenting work that's normally their job, their behavior gets WORSE, whereas with a healthy person, do7ng a favor might increase goodwill. So glad that's behind me!
Running away from a narcissist is the worst thing you do for your mental health. Just make them runaway. Stand your ground ignore them and destroy them with your silence. Just treat them as invisible they can't bear that... never react to thier crookedness. Good luck ...
I was married to a narcissist. Did not realize what was causing here behavioral cycles and her abusive ways. At 8 months being married I told her I was done. She had changed so much from before we got married.
Definitely get rid of friends who don’t believe you or who support them. Don’t look back. And believe it at the first sign. I told a friend I was being abused by a narcissist and she befriended him even more and ran back and told him I said he was abusive. Be careful out there and definitely set your boundaries quick and fast. Don’t second guess yourself.
She's probably got a thing for him herself and thought this was her in. You're definitely better off without her in your life too.
They are enablers...
. .."set your boundaries quick and fast"...💯
Jealousy is evil. If people are your friends, they will realize what is or has gone on, and will later come around.
Jealous people twist things and it can get ugly. Stay confident and patient. 🙏
Not a friend ..
One thing missing, I deal with a narcissist daily, and they are great actors, they can play a role to get what they want but once they get it then the narcissist comes out, that's how do many end up marrying a narcissist, if they would have known ahead of time they would never have gotten married, so never inestimate the lengths a narcissist will go to get what they want, they'll shock most
Spot on! 👍
Sooooo TRUE.
Exactly! I married one too and in the beginning he was extremely charming and romantic!
@@emelmestanoglu1485 same here now it's dr.jekyl and Mr. Hyde
@@samaahammam3126 exactly! He is so quiet and charming to everyone, no one would believe me if I told them. My close family and friends have seen the ugly side to him now and are shocked. I don't know how long I can take this for. Its a very lonely marriage :(
I suffered in two relationships with this subject matter. Spot on with a narc being pathological liars. It’s super good to have the words to have an explanation of behaviors that were very confusing. It’s so sad Thankyou The setting of boundaries is imperative.
This is the best video I've seen on the topic! Thank you. I am going to have to have one of these confrontations. I don't expect it will end with a positive outcome, but it's still necessary and hopefully, there will at least be some closure.
After you’ve dealt with enough of them, it can become quite easy to permanently walk away from a narcissist.
FACTS 💯!!!...And it's ALWAYS the BEST DECISION with these evil people 😈
Not when they are family, very complicated. You can’t go no contact and have to employ other techniques. Very testing
Totally agree! They are worthless creeps anyway - they will just do you harm! Keep walking!
Yes! Limited contact or if possible none...and live your life!
@@JuxtaPositionings I will do very limited contact and enjoy my life.
Narcissist makes things all about them. Even their Children's wedding. Look at me playing a guitar and singing. I'm the one you need to pay attention to, not my child and their spouse.
They like stealing the show and showing people what to do!
My ex narc officiated his daughters wedding!
Plays drums at church and is pure evil!
@@justinamusyoka4986 Yep they know everything better... They will also tell others how to think. or.. to stop thinking ("you think to much" ). They are disrespectful to the core.
@One Fine Day They would be better of with a divers wedding -
- only them and the priest with wet suit and finnes under water -
what a peacefull ceremony - no
narcmonster there.
I would reater putt up with the sharc than the narc. 😁
The narc is allways the bride at the wedding and the corps at the furneal.
The sycest pacient - the greatest victime or hero - the smartest ass in the room and the prettyest anyway - 🤪🥶🥶🥶🤮👽💩🤡
- in theyr mind - 😂
I subscribed!
Also... I've actually been doing a lot of these listed purely out of instinct after 3.5 years of this increasingly abhorrent treatment and control the NARC partner has subject me to. I am maintaining firm on a few but I struggle a lot with the sentiment excuse and the not reacting to the emotional/behavior tantrums and disrespect 😬 even though it's been happening for long time now consistently.. it still feels like the first shocking blow!! Why?! Why am I not desensitized to this nonsense yet?!
I am scared! Every time you are strong to them there will be a consequence by their anger or stone wall cold to me. Even I am not with them I still feel chilled my body is shaking. I don’t know when I will be okay 😢.
Love this
Put them in their place
Draw the line
Dont let them back in
Move on with a better life
Hi Jen 👋 I hope my comment didn't sound as a form of privacy invasion your comment tells of a wonderful woman with a beautiful heart which led me to comment I don't normally write in the comment section but I think you deserve this complement. If you don’t mind can we be friends? Thanks God bless you….🌹
I worked with a narcissist. She was my immediate superior. I cannot describe in words what I experienced and how I felt. At one point, I decided I couldn't go on like this, and I quit my job. I said to myself, "That was it! It's over!" I didn't want more negative emotions, dramas, unnecessary nerves, and not to be respected as a human being, unnecessary meaningless arguments, etc., just because the narcissist wants to be right, to be number one, to be the center of attention.
These tips are game changer. I am practicing tthese advice for years. And ofcourse its not that easy once you start to realize that you're currently in the battle. But its all worth it and fullfilling once you've notice that they start to fade away then leave you alone completely and once that happens then you knew that you win
I also put narcissist out from my life and now living peacefully. All of the facts provided by you were exactly right about narcissistic person that was in my life.
Don't engage with a narcissist. Don't! Whether it's a family member or a coworker or friend.
I had to cut all ties with my narcissistic mother, simply to save myself and she turned my siblings against to punish me - that's the only way she could hurt me, but it's their loss.
I had an associate who always talked behind peoples back, and I found out she had said a lot of shit about me (surprise!!), and I met her and she said " Do you have a second, I want to explain myself, I didn't mean to hurt you.." I just looked at her and said "No you can't, and I don't have time for your BS!" and she left really quick 🤣😅
By responding to your “associate” (albeit, firmly).., you still gave her ‘narcissistic supply’. Had you said nothing at all, then walked away, the outcome would’ve resonated loader. Instead, you gave her words to fuel her next move. Ever heard this saying?-- “Silence can be deafening.”
I think you have the exact response she needed to hear! You cut her Cold with No further conversation about it. She KNEW you weren't about to feed into or play her little shitty games!!!👏😎
Amen to you....my family was the same way... My dad was the only decent one.. My mother could never say she was sorry.....
@@cindyrice5141 Same here. After my estranged narcissist mother died suddenly, then my aunt who was just following my mother’s wishes was to send a check that she had left me in my name for $1.00. I ripped the check up. My aunt died a few months after that. Karma got them! No fucks given. Total narc bitches!
I have a narcissist mother also...hardest relationship I've had!
It's difficult for me because I avoid conflicts but realizing I grew up with a narcissistic parent is making it better. Standing up for myself was disrespectful so I just was keeping quiet, even to this day I have a hard time speaking up for myself.
Same ❤️
That has maybe a bit to do with how they were raised too
I finally let my narcissistic mom have it. I brought up all the stuff she did in the past and her answer all the time was "I don't remember that" instead of just saying "I'm sorry" and I would call her out on her behaviors DURING the conversation and she would claim "That's not what happened" while proceeding to DO/SAY the very things I was talking about in the very next sentence. It got to the point where it started to get funny actually. She's the kind of person who can do and say whatever to hurt you, but then play the victim when you call her out on it.
And of course I heard about her slandering me to my sister which is even worse cause my mom used to put her down the worse growing up despite my sis already having pretty low self esteem as it is. Now instead of my sis growing into a person to stand up for herself, she's allowed herself to be fed lies and be controlled by a narcissistic parent
Omg! This video was eyes opening for me. I am only 2 weeks out of leaving an emotionally abusive relationship where I was made to believe i was crazy
All of my family and friends saw what I couldn't. In between all of this behavior he was amazing to me and pulled me in only to continue the abusive patterns all over again. I believe truly watching this today as I am still struggling with doubt was life changing. THANK YOU ❤
Omg THIS is the exact advice I’ve been looking for! Ryan the Love of my life has narcissistic personality disorder, undiagnosed I myself have been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder so you see my heartache I feel empowered now in a non revengeful way like I can handle things more appropriately now again tysm this was my first experience with this channel I will now be an avid subscriber
I can honestly say that I am not Scared or susceptible to anything that was mentioned on this particular video. Of course, I'm not just a narcissist. I've got other wonderful qualities too,
My heart goes out to all the Victims in this world It's uncalled for and breaks my heart to know so many are losing their lives over this. The Narcissist is uncalled for. *Minslegend* , don't stop doing you we here to support you 💯%..
Very ture I wish everyone going throw this the best the devil I took into my life turned as many as they could against me out of pure jealousy they truly are sick evil people.
I've still my real friends and family and I pray to God these nasty people keep away from us all and anyone reading this Amem 🙏
The cure to this is JESUS!!!!!!!This is such a sad state to live in, never being really happy with oneself or others! God looks at the Heart! God is love, peace, love, joy gentleness and .more! Galatians chapter 5 verses 22 through 26 tells you the Fruits of the Spirit( This is what Jesus is all about road to Heaven! Galatians chapter 6 verses19 through 21 verse strife, hatred, envying heresies, and more this is of Satan Hell! The works of the flesh! Ask Jesus to Save, Cure you come into your life!! He will Save and Cure you!!! I PLea the Blood of Jesus on all Narcisisstic in Jesus Name Amen!!!!
So true I was shot 2x by one! Then my mom is one I was her scapegoat !
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My dad is a narcissist. It has messed me up so bad. I was basically his punching bag. I was always the target of his anger.
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This is hands down one of the most helpful videos on Narcissistic behavior, THUS FAR💯💯👍🏼 ♥️
Thank YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!
After having dealt with narcissists for decades - the #1 piece of advice - walk away, pay them as little attention as possible.
Also, after having dealt with narcissists for decades - if you want to stick it to the narcissist - prepare for one of the most brutal fights of your life.
I DO NOT recommend going down the latter path because it can be very easy to lose yourself, especially if you have no idea what you are doing.
I completely agree that systematically dismantling an abusive narcissist can be the single most satisfying thing in the world.
Standing up to a narcissist is one thing, beating them in their own game is a WHOLE different thing.
But the MAIN reason why I would advised going out of your way to mess with a narcissist:
You have better things to do.
You are free.
Heal, recover, rediscover yourself.
Help others who are dealing with narcissists.
Live your own life.
Peace be with you all!
“They like to claim your accomplishments” hit in me in the feels!!!!
Nothing like hearing Mr or Mrs critic alternate between stealing your own words and phrases in a false flattery attempt,. YET TELLING you you're allegedly worthless. I mean, you just can't make this crap up! After being atheist for 44 years, I am convinced that these people are agents of the dark side of the universe
They lie about what you do for them and take credit for it. I used to feel sorry for them...
Now I don't. They need me and I don't need them. Who the heck needs being used and lied about.
I was complimenting a previous colleagues aptitude, and the response was "well of course, I trained them". This wasn't said in jest, it was said with absolute sincerity.
Or say "if it wasn't for me"
@@jeffyou6340 omg YES! I've realised that when in conversation this person I have in mind literally repeats things I've said word for word back to me in a later conversation.
My phrase for stopping my mum's narcisissm today was this. She said "you could have just done it my way" i said "yes or i can do it MY way. Which is OKAY."
Kudos to u for sticking to ur ground, its not easy, but it makes u damn powerful.
It's tough I know because you love her not matter how bad she acts sometimes, my mom was bipolar an would fly out of control and then just do things that no one should to do. But she was a very damaged and hurt woman who never got over being hurt as a little girl. It's not a justification it's just the truth and you know what to expect so you gotta make sure to always love them but keep them at arms length, never allow yourself to put yourself in their control. Don't borrow anything, or live with them and make sure you stay financial stable an stay out of them being able to control you with threats of getting kicked out. Keep them at arms length and stay strong.
You Honor your parents.. unless she was diagnosed
@@zacharypayne4080 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 (Just sayin]
@@zacharypayne4080 you may honour your parents. that's your right. but it's not for you to say what others should do. narcissistic parents are different from others and, depending how far along the scale they are, can be utterly unable to love their children/partners/anyone. and can be very cruel at the same time.
Keep putting these out there, the3y are informative and REAL.. I am thinkin of the ONE's who fell victim to the Narcissist and don't or do not have this information!!! THEY may never get well and may never know the answers or the truth to set them free. The many are out there suffering thinkin and convinced it was their fault..
yes, I subscribed. Thank you doing this video, it is really helpful. I've been doing some of the things you listed, so it was great to see I'm on the right to path for my health & preservation.
Thank you so much for subscribing and for your kind words! It means a lot to know that the video resonated with you.
I was with a narcissist for 32 years and didn’t see it until he did something unspeakable. My family began showing me the things he did all that time. He didn’t start out that way but once we were married things definitely changed. I have been “narcissistic free” for several years now and am getting better every day. Thank you for showing people they can stand up and stop the bullying.
I have a hard time understanding that you were with someone 32 years and didn't know they were a narcissist. That is pretty unbelievable.
@@floridagirl5250 They lie in wait. It happens. Not all narcs are the same.
@@Fizzy5pringwater I realize that people do stay in abusive situations for years and years...which always puzzles me especially when a woman works and children are grown. My guess is severe codependency ...Stockholm syndrome...trauma bonding. I have a bit of trouble understanding someone who "doesn't know" they are with an abusive and disordered individual...especially a narcissist (who, by definition, have generally similar tactics/playbooks) after 30 years. I was ready to jump off a cliff after a short time with the monster I married because he was so mean and...well...monstrous! How anyone can stick around for that I just don't understand. Don't mean to be a jerk, just can't wrap my head around that.
Which "loser" men did you turn down for that guy who got you with his personality?
Was he a tall guy with money?
“Narcissistic love is riding on the rollercoaster of disaster filled with a heart full of tears.” - Sheree Griffin
Its Best, Not to Think & Speak of Narrow perspective truths; because Others will see the Great, Big picture of Absolute truth. Like when people accuse someone for a Chain reaction of defense towards Anothers Initial actions of Offensiveness. "The Lower" will try to degrade "the Higher-class" in any way (to try to uplift themselves. Like when people accuse the actual Rite-person of being a Narcissist; when of actual reality was only rejecting the Others initial wrongs done of Offensiveness!
100% true, living with them, blow out your mind and never feel the ground under your feet.
@@Maria-jr7sy Yes it's true😔 God bless you ✨☘️🙏Hope you're not having to put up with their wicked treat
ment any more
@@evelina787 unfortunately I'm married with a grandiose narcisist for 41 years now. I always put blame on me because I wasn't never able to make him happy because I wasn't aware about the existence of narcisistic pattern, nobody warned me, even when I whent in psychotherapy for 1 year in 2008. I developed 3 types of autoimmune deseases because I somatise. Fortunately I have a strong and well constructed mind so I have a good resilience even if life is very hard some days.
Now I can't leave because I'm not economically indipendent and my 90 years old parents lives in the same house (not same appartment)
They deserve to live their last few years remaining, in peace.
I put the trolley on me.
😂😂. Yup, that's them !!!😅😅😅
I subscribed. Thanks for all the knowledge and understanding. I'm currently 29 yrs old and it's the 1st time I've dated someone this broken who's only mission seems to break me beyond repair😢 the worst part is I realized it too late so unfortunately I fell deeply in love with my worst nightmare and part of me is unsure/afraid to wake up
Calling them out creates an explosive argument filled with a never ending black hole of gaslighting. Narcissists will never take responsibility for their actions, so calling them out is a waste of time and energy. And when you’re in a relationship with one, you need to protect both of those things with everything you’ve got.
Some comment about narcisists at workplace.
Its not the narcisits against you. Once you uncover you will find that the narcisist only survives as long as there is no transparency. Giving selective information and keep people from being a team. Once you overcome this and create transparent info flow the power of a narcisist just vanishes! Transparency is the thing they hate the most!
💯 🎯
+ document all - communicate only to e mail with them - never be allone with them in a room -
What do you mean keep people from being a team?
@@taniacarvajalpineda3211 77 ranko said it well. Here a real life example: my boss told me that one of my peers want to do a rotation and take my position. After I talked to that person it revealed that he had told her the same about me wanting to take her position. But none of us had any intention about doing that. When we both set up a meeting with him together to discuss... guess who didn t come to the meeting? It could have ended in us both mistrusting each other if we would not have talked...
@77ranko You are thinking of Obama and his 3rd presidency using Biden as his puppet. Obama said he wished someone else was the mouthpiece and he just had to talk into their ear for them to do his bidding. Obama separated children at the border, but the media never told you until Trump became president then it was important. Under Trump, the US had the fastest-growing economy the world had ever seen. Gas prices were $1.50 (I bet you enjoy paying more!). Afghanistan is a complete disaster by leaving millions of dollars of high-tech equipment and Americans behind. Small businesses were hiring, yet under Forgetful Joe businesses are closing at a record rate. Your narc tendency to get socialism, then communism, here faster than any other country isn't surprising. You crave a narc's result.
@@rongurbajr bingo
When your boss is a narcissist, and you stand up for yourself, all your coworkers will take the coward's way out and support the boss.
That's just business though, nothing personal about it. Remember, the only reason 99.999% of people go to work is because they need the money, and that's it. Nothing more to it than that.
Yep.
Or maybe YOU'RE the narcissist and just projecting.
I understand, had a similar experience. The new boss was being backed by someone who had political links and money. People seem to follow power instead of standing up for what is right.
@@STho205 🤣🤣
I subscribed
This video made me realize I have a lot of narcissistic tendencies. I dont want to be like this. This is gonna help be a better father and better to my girl. THANK YOU
Thank you for subscribing!
Yeah. Don’t use ultimatums. Ask for what you want (like an apology or a SPECIFIC answer to a SPECIFIC question). But DON’T threaten them with any consequences if they don’t comply.
Threats like this are PURE GOLD to narcissist. If you don’t word it just right, they’ll either say you’re a maniac or else you’re trying to blackmail them.
Ask for what you want, preferably in a text or email. Then WAIT. They will probably ignore the request. But their failure to respond could be all the rope needed to hand themselves.
Being with my ex narc for the past 6 yrs. made me observe this very pattern. I think they wanted to feel very important in a way that is disturbing. Instead of building trust with their intimate partners, they destroy the trust that they built with you (in that case lying when they tried to put you in their pedestal). Once they have a committed partner, they can’t stand being loved authentically by one person. Instead they go on and prey on other women that is susceptible to their love bombing. My ex narc was a compulsive pursuer in a relationship. He would go back and forth to the women he were involved before or try to meet women in complicated situation so that going public isn’t an option while having you as their main supply. In the end they destroy the very person that loved them. They are like toddlers testing your love for them. Showing and telling them you love them isn’t enough, they will cheat on your face to make you feel inadequate even if you are more than they deserve. They want to test your love for them so they keep hurting you and when you have enough of their abuse, you leave. Then they tell you, ‘you never loved me because you abandon me’. Well in fact it’s their actions and narcissistic behavior that made you leave or in other cases they discard you and will give silly reasons of the discard. Mine would use, ‘she’s crazy’, ‘she’s a nega-star’, ‘she insults me’, ‘she cheated on me’ et al. So with this pattern of infidelities and emotional abuse (who knows what else) it’s better to walk away. I did walk away and is now rebuilding my life with our daughter. We are struggling financially because I’m not earning enough to provide for my daughter but now we get to laugh and bring with us sunshine every day. No lies, no abuse and no fake love. We only live once, forgive yourself and move forward but never forget the lesson that narc abuse taught you. That is to respect yourself to walk away from what’s hurting and destroying you. That you deserve a life of solitude, happiness and love. Hugs*** :) Additionally I hired a private detective *Metaspyhub@gmail. com* . Once I knew what the narc was up to, it got easier to get over that lying, cheating, sack of doo doo, loser. I didn’t need closure from the narc, I paid for it. Best money I EVER spent!
Wow seems like our narcs are very very similar. Your text could be mine. Only that i didnt finally manage to leave yet.
Wish you all the best
It’s like I know the same sociopathic , phsyopathic, narsasistic, piece of shit, scumbag, sex predater, drunkard, loser, what’s the chances ? Ha! Good for you! A lot of women just put up with it , to there detremint,👍
I left, and your message sounds exactly like my story.
This really sounds very much like my own story. Are you better now? Does it get better after you heal from the heartbreak?
Narcissistic projection is an ego defense mechanism used by the narcissistic. to avoid suffering further narcissistic injury equip yourself and understand why they do the things they do and it most reason why I recommend the truth worthy and reliable service man @cyber_tech_service_tools
My mother is a narcissist and growing up with her in the same home was a REAL challenge. As I got older, there were LONG PERIODS I would go without speaking to her. I’m talking SEVERAL years. The last time I had to deal with her was for 13 months. But, I grew up and changed and at 33/34, I just wouldn’t argue with her at all. I learned to walk away, which happened DAILY! She realized I was distancing myself from her and started behaving petty by doing things like, taking toilet paper out of the bathroom or taking the napkins from the kitchen and hiding them in her room or she would try and start fights especially between my sister and her husband. It was the best feeling when my sister, her husband, and I NEVER entertained her not once. We would just replace the toilet paper, replace the napkins, and ignore her childish behaviors. She continued to do petty things and act poorly and we continued to behave maturely. In the past, we would let her have it. Well, guess what? A narcissist WANTS to see you in rage, upset, cry, needing them because for them they feel in control and feel they have complete control over you and your emotions. Guess what? I’m 35 and back living on my own again after COVID shook things up. We have ALL moved out and I continue to HAPPILY keep my distance.
After I left, she told one of my sisters that she would never speak to us again. My sister said to her, Ev(me) went 8 years without speaking to you so I’m promising you she could care less! Hahahaha!!! Damn right!
Story
My sister use to work at Waffle House and we met a LOVELY therapist there. Amazing man! He got us talking and we got on the subject of our mom. He said, you have two options. You can keep a narcissist around and deal with whatever they bring OR you can walk away and love them from afar. He said, personally, I think walking away is the healthy option. I agreed and STILL agree with that and always will! WALK AWAY or take them as they are and allow them to drain the life out of you!
12. Don’t feed into their crap. EVER! Silence is key. They’re already deeply insecure so when you step to them with not a damn thing coming out of your mouth and you walk away, it shows YOU are the powerful one and YOU have control over yourself! Who wins? YOU! Trust, I didn’t always do so. I do it now in general because silence is more powerful than words a lot of times. WALK AWAY!!!! 🦋💙
Thank you for your perspective. It helped me a lot.
I hate how no matter what you do, you feed the ego. "Do nothing, leave them alone" at least is the option that takes the least effort 😕
@Rosario Tato
You are welcome! I’m glad I can help! :*
@ Michael Bracke Well, it all depends on how you are feeling on the inside. I would walk away because in the past it would turn into some drama that I refused to entertain. I know I needed to do that, which even taught me patience. If you walk away with the intent that you are doing whats best for you and you see no point in engaging in nonsense, you are not in your ego.
When I was a kid, my mom would charge at me and scream or smack me and I would stand straight staring at her, at first that is. Hahaha! I did it to piss her off and it worked. I wouldn’t flinch, scream back, or show any kind of emotions. That was my little ego at play! And it worked. Lol! Now, I’m 35, I just walk off or I get quiet because I notice I’m getting annoyed and the conversation will end no where. I witnessed that a hundred times over. Anyone that argues with her gets smacked down, cursed out, and called names. No need!
Sis?
If you’re dealing with malignant narcissist under the influence of alcohol, it’s much harder than many think. They repeat the bad behavior (screaming/banging on doors for a long time or even resorting to violence) until they manage to break you, especially if you can’t get away, such as when they trap you in a room/vehicle. Some narcissistic people are very violent, not just controlling.If they resort to violence it’s much worse, because you can’t reason with them. They’re often filled with blinded controlling jealousy, if they’re your spouse/partner you’re more in danger when you leave/divorce them!
Oh my God! I subscribed and watched to number 10! I am so relieved to know that my intuitions were correct about a female close family member who’s actions almost led to my demise. Was close to death and she abandoned me after volunteering to be my person. Thank you for this sooooo much, I always blamed myself and acted the same. Alienating myself from family because of my low self image. Blessings 😈☮️🎀✝️
Thank you for sharing your story. Very grateful that our content could provide some clarity for you.
If you can do it, NO CONTACT is much easier and better for healing.
I agree with you 💯 %
We go through life absolutely stunned at the needless cruelty that flows from people. It is impossible for decent people to comprehend the minds of the abusers. The way some are born without sight or hearing or an appendage, some are born with no capacity to know good from evil, unless they believe evil is good, which is another impossible thing to fathom.
Sounds like you're talking about most countries leaders. When interviewed, they are good at skirting. We are supposed to obey....
Psychologist have confirmed they know good from evil. They just choose whichever gives them the supply they crave whether it’s to fool a stranger into seeing them as a good person (good) or to be the one to wipe that smile off your face, for no reason other than being tired of seeing you smile. (evil)
Great video. Very well said. Absolutely agree.
Thankyou, watching this gave me a little hope and to know im not alone 👍
Note that you can feed their ego by arguing with them. everything you do feeds their ego so long as you give them attention.
That's so sick evil dirty demons
It got tiring for me....I left my whole family behind... Never looked back....
@@cindyrice5141 same here. I spend all holidays alone but those days don't seem like holidays anymore so they're just days like any other. I stopped feeling sorry for myself a long time ago when I realized that if I had my family in my life just to spend holidays with, I'd also have all their toxicity consuming me. And the sting of all the ugliness stays and lingers until it blends into the next gathering, and on and on. What I've learned is that some folks don't like to introduce someone new to their family gatherings so in the last few years there have been fewer Thanksgiving invites (from friends) and that's ok--I do understand and I'm not hurt by it. I just make a smaller Thanksgiving dinner (roasted turkey thighs) for myself, I won't miss out on that! And who doesn't love holiday leftovers! I have found my peace and I'm better off on my own. 😊
I recently quit my job just to get away from my narcissist boss. I was tired of being put down everyday and called names everyday and he even made fun of my race. It is sooooooooooooo good to have him out of my life.
Really good. I have a narsist attend one of my online groups. She doesn't know she is one. After her multiple lies, and not doing the group exercises. I pointed out some very clear facts. And pointed out that they said they wanted to take a break from the group over 5 times. She can be sweet, charming, but we do not need her disruptions within the group and towards members . So I drew a strong boundary in a kind wa. They blocked me. :) That can be a very good thing.
omg! everthing was so true it was like you were writing about everything that my BF is and does. I have even seen him doing some things and he tries to convince me that I imagined it. It so hard to get away and I dont know why because I know Im better and deserve better. Alot of it is that I care about the person that he use to be
The best thing is to ignore their taunts they will try to get a reaction out of you then turn around and play victim..they have no problem using you then telling you no when you need them. Or even just say you didn’t have to help them..but you know if you said no they would have had a meltdown and you would have been the bad guy. I realized after years that I was a victim of 2 of them. I finally stood up to one when we got into a physical fight I think they were truly shocked that I did that. I was proud of myself because I kept the promise to myself if they ever challenged me and got in my personal space I would not back down like I did in the past.
At a girl!
Awesome! They are very sick and twisted creatures.
Hip, Hip, Hooray! Wish I could've been there cheering you on!!😉😎
So true
@@gionagrace3343 yes yes and yes
One tip I have is never set boundaries. It only tells them how to get to you. They are like children who find breaking rules fun.
Do you mean don’t tell them what the set boundaries are?
Well that is true but only in a very limited way as long as you maintain your own self control and courage
Any enemy will always look for any door (to a fortress or castle let’s say) and they will always try to breach the wall anywhere or any way they can; but at least having the wall or barrier can make it extremely difficult if not impossible for them to get to you
It’s just the way things work and the more walls and barriers you put up against them the better your success will be even if they try to think of ways to get to you
@@TheReetchou
I would suggest that you tell them exactly what and where your boundaries will be
If you don’t do that you will appear weak and unconfident in your ability to resist
People who keep silent about something typically have something to hide (not always and every time of course) and hiding something means you’re concerned about others discovering the truth
If you’re confident and have no fear then you shouldn’t be fearful of people knowing your truth
Narcissistic people cannot be transparent because they live in fear and don’t want you to see them for who they actually are inside
Do not do what they do and stand firm with strength and courage and tell them exactly where you stand and you absolutely will not tolerate their nonsense and there is nothing that will change that
They cannot handle nor cope with a person who is vigilant and confident and who makes themselves absolutely crystal clear
@@TheReetchou I mean they are permanent 5 year olds. And if you tell them what not to do, they will do it out of spite. They know what the boundaries are as you do. They just don't care. Telling them what would upset you or what would effect you is giving them your "weakness" ,because that's how they look at it.
@@johngaulding3710,
You are 1000% correct! Informing a narcissist of your boundaries BEFORE they cross them, is basically giving the narcissist ammunition against you. They’re going to cross “the line” regardless but, NEVER announce areas that affects you deeply! I did that with a past (‘Past’ is the operative word) Covert Narcissist 40 yr.old neighbor. BIG MISTAKE on my part!! However, after MANY disputes, darn near fist fights, Police calls and Court appearances..., I drove that Covert Narcissist and his enabling parents away next door, and COMPLETELY out of the neighborhood!!
I'm an empath... Thank you for your words. I needed to hear them.
Also, be sure you are actually dealing with a narcissist. That term is thrown around loosely anytime someone gets their feelings hurt. I have been accused of being a narcissist by many less than satisfactory employees. What they didn't understand is that I lost sleep every time I terminated them. I was pushing them to be better. They didn't let me down. They let themselves down, and that's what bothered me. If everyone has a gift, I'm guilty of simply trying to unwrap it.
Sounds like the narcissists sensed you were an empath and took advantage of that. You did the right thing by letting them go. You helped the smart ones grow and become better persons. You can't save those who refuse to learn and those who refuse to be saved. So, try not to lose any more sleep.
@@ganymeade5151 thanks! I now have a great crew and stress free!
Narc is the new "crazy"
Whenever you can, just leave.
Thank you for this.
I called out a narcissist... He didn't like it. He kept threatening to call the police on me. That I'm the "mentally ill" one. Except I had been up to my doctors and asked to be interviewed by a psychologist. I passed all the tests. I'm normal for what had has happened to me in the past few years. Contracting Covid, domestic violence and learning to walk again. Plus the court dates that were adjourned and then going to court while in the physiotherapy hospital with my violent ex...
I've cut all contact with him.
It broke my heart but I can't have someone like him in my brand new life.
So yeah, sometimes it's incredibly hard to do but you have to...
Excellent job you have only one life to live no more tolerance no more abusive life so keep it up
I’m in the same boat !
This video is so ON POINT on all possible levels! 👍👍👍
Subscribed! 🙌
Awesome, thanks for subscribing! Hope you enjoy the content!
And all these years I thought I was alone dealing with a nut job! Great advice!
I broke up with my narcissistic boyfriend 3 weeks ago. This video is spot on. I'm so thankful I had the strength to walk away. For good.
How did you find the strength to do it. I cant seem to let go of her.
I think there’s a new form of narcissism which psychology didn’t discover yet.
My mum became a narcissist when I was 14 from lack of pleasure in life because we believes its wrong to have fun. She continues to present day. I am now 28. She has all the narcissistic traits.
There is however aspects of her that are too chilling, even for a narcissist. She worked for 14 years to trigger or make me angry 24/7. She made me sick for 10 years and got me in troubles that would make your hair grey. That’s not what’s chilling.
What made my hair stand and still gives me chills is the calmness and coldness and joy in her eyes when she would make reach the edge of death from pain. The empathy she shows is part of her manipulation.
My advise to others: meditate and learn to be emotionally self-sufficient. That’s happiness
Excellent advice!!! Very good advice! Thank you.
#1 Tactic. Stay away from narcissists.
@@frankybebop2913 Shoot him.
What if u r born in such a fam
I'm afraid of calling out narcisisstic behavior in case the person is just acting stupid in the moment
Somehow it feels like empaths love them and just can’t. 🤷🏾♂️
Well you wouldn't disown your child except as a last resort. Trying to put them in their place might be worth a try before disowning.